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zendvyaa · 8 months

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To All The Years I Had Before

A solo para written by Zendvyaa

27. That's where I am now. Not just 'what age' I am. But, where. I know that it might not make much sense, but, it's how I feel. You know what they say; "It's about the journey, not the destination." And that rings true for me. 27 years young today, and I feel like I've accomplished so much more than I could ever imagine.

It all started that the California Shakespeare Theater. If it wasn't for my Momma Bear, Claire taking the opportunity to become House Manager for Cal Shakes - that's what they call it -, then I might've just continued to be a quiet kid. I mean, I went from a shy kindergartener that had to repeat the grade due to just that, to a kid that found the spotlight, and never let it go. Thanks to my Mom being the trouper that she is, taking the job to support herself and my Dad as teachers themselves, I was able to pursue my theatre classes. If it hadn't have been for that, I don't think that I would be where I am. That's just one of the things that I'm so grateful for. I mean, I was even cast as Little Ti Moune in Berkley Playhouse's "Once on This Island" in 2009.

I did so much as a kid. From playing basketball at age six, to dancing in a hip hop dance group called Future Shock Oakland at the age of eight, and my theater classes that I took along the way at Cal Shakes. These things helped shape me into not only the kid that I would be come, but the woman that I would turn into. I can't have one without the other. Basketball, dancing, and acting is apart of me now. Even if no one sees me doing it as much.

'The Effect of Gamma Rays on Man-in-the-Moon Marigolds' was not only a monologue I used to audition for the Oakland School of the Arts, but it was the same one I used when I auditioned for 'Shake It Up' on Disney Channel. Not only that, but dancing helped me land a Sears commercial at an early age with THEE Selena Gomez in 2009. It's crazy thinking about this now, because Selena and I are good friends now.

Things came full circle because a vast majority of the kids that were in that Sears commercial went on to pursue a career in the entertainment industry. Ross Lynch included. And to top it off, my 2009 audition for Shake It Up was originally for Cece, but they called me back to audition for Rocky Blue. My first major network show. My first character I played on tv. I'm so grateful. I still find the working title of 'Dance, Dance, Chicago' is so hilarious. Thank GOD they chose 'Shake It Up' instead. I digress. I was talking about full circle moments, yes.

The biggest full circle was how I went from dancing in the Sears 'arrive lounge' commercial with Selena Gomez, to having Selena Gomez sing the theme song to the tv show that I later became a lead on within the same year. A show about teenagers wanting nothing more but to dance, and wind up dancing in a popular local Chicago show called 'Shake It Up, Chicago!' Not only that, but I was apart of Kidz Bop 15. Also in 2009. I was in the 'Hot In Cold' music video if you're wondering. I don't wanna talk about how they didn't really use my singing voice. Matter of fact, I don't wanna talk about it at all.

Proceeding SIU, I was overwhelmed as a kid. Being thrown into the spotlight like that, and the show doing well was both a blessing and a curse. I wasn't really ready for it. Not like I am now. I mean, I still get overwhelmed, but I think I'm better at tackling those feelings now than I was before. From being on other shows on Disney Channel like Good Luck Charlie, and A.N.T. Farm, to doing many music videos for SIU as well as my own when I started my short-lived music career. The 'Something To Dance For' and 'TTYLXOX' mashup video is still one of my favorites. Oh, and 'Contagious Love'.

My DFTS and ZSwag era…..that…I loved that era. Did I mention on top of being a dancer, actress, and basketball player, that I loved the arts too. I used to draw all the time. If you scroll down my Instagram feed far enough, you are sure to find my old drawings. Not only that, but I loved to sing, and modeling became yet another passion that I started to have. I really blossomed from this quirky, high energy kid to this woman that knows her angles, can flow effortlessly from one click of the camera, to the next. I mean, have you seen the behind the scenes shot of my Vogue Italia shoot in June 2022? Not to toot my own horn, but…going from fun poses as a kid to what I'm able to do now just blows my mind!!!

Anyway, I love fashion. Even when I was in my 'ZSwag' era. Where being a tomboy who could rock high heels was everything to me. I still love that photo I took of myself with a pair of Jordan's on and heels. I look back at it, and laugh. That part of me never left. One minute, you would see me playing basketball, or skateboarding, the next, I was making the most out of the clothes Law and I were given on the red carpet. Which, by the way, were slim to none. No one wanted to dress me. No one at all. Not even during the SIU era. We really struggled for a while. Something really shifted for Law and I between the end of SIU and K.C., because you could see it. I went from wearing clothes from Kmart, to high end couture before I knew it!!I mean. If younger me knew that I would go from being an 'easy, breezy, beautiful, Covergirl', to now being the face of Lancôme beauty, from being the face/ambassador of Valentino, to the House Ambassador of Louis Vuitton, from rocking Momma Claire's handmade jewelry - I still do!! -, to being the face of Bulgari jewelry? Like???? That's HUGE! And I'm now the face of Smart Water as well??? I think she would LOSE IT!!! Just….

And Law… I'm so grateful for his light. He has been through a lot. He got really sick one time, which I won't talk about, but, he made it through. We always talk about how I found him so fabulous when Law worked as a personal shopper in 2011 while I was on 'Shake It Up!'. Things really just fell into my lap. We had a mutual friend introduce us, and the rest was history. Law has been my Fairy God Motha since I was 14, and doing the met as Cinderella and The Fairy God Mother in 2019 was by far, my favorite moment. I got to share that with him. Like…. I wouldn't be such a sought after name in fashion has it not have been for Law. Let's keep it real. I may do my own makeup for events, but Law keeps me together with the looks. I'm so happy to have him as my Creative Director. I will always support him in his career. Whatever he decides to do. We are thee dynamic duo, after all. As much as I love fashion, and although I did style him for Canada's 'Fashion' magazine, I just don't think I could exist in fashion without him.

After Frenemies, Zapped, and the success of SIU, I started to make my exit as a Disney star. Disney Channel asked me to come back, and Ieveraged that in telling them that I would only come back to Disney if I would be made as executive producer in whatever tv show they wanted to do next. That tv show being 'Super Awesome Katy', being renamed to K.C. Undercover. There was no way I was going to be on tv being called 'Katy'. No. 'K.C.' was just fine.

Sometime after that, I was able to land the role of Michelle "M.J." Watson-Jones. Keeping the secret that I was about to become the new MJ of the Marvel Cinematic Universe was one that was very hard to keep. But unlike the guy who plays the friendly neighbourhood Spider-Man (yes, that was intentional. Yes, I'm still brushing off the London that rubbed off on me. Hush.), I was able to keep a secret. That to me was such a massive role to land. Even though I might not be an important character to some people, I'm speaking about it, because although I left Disney Channel to technically still work for Disney through Marvel, Spider-Man: Homecoming helped lead me from K.C. Undercover to Euphoria. Which, is the show that I'm apart of now.

Anyone who knows me, knows how much of a Beyoncé fan I am. Being in the 'All Night' music video in 2016 is the biggest accomplishment for me. I met someone whom I've looked up to for years, I got to star in her music video!! And I know y'all have seen my Yoncé car dance video. I was acting up with Darnell when Renaissance dropped. There are several videos out there with me cutting up and having fun with Darnell, my personal assistant since K.C. Undercover, or by myself. Don't play with me!! The set of the 'All Night' music video was also where I met Amara and Chloe. Even then, I knew those two were destined for greatness. If I could have Beyoncé as my mentor? I'd be fainting every time we spoke. They're so blessed. I love those girls. They're really doing amazing things as a group, and as individuals.

Immediately after HOCO, I stayed in New York to Film The Greatest Showman, aka, TGSM with Hugh Jackman and Zac Efron. I had the time of my life. I mean…. the training I had to do to portray an aerodynamic Circus performer was intense. I hate exercising. Which, is something I remember mentioning in my 'Zendaya' app when that was a thing. When it comes to work though, I suck it up, and do the training. I like learning new things, pushing myself, and making each role believable. Anne Wheeler was pretty scary though. Performing trapeze isn't easy, but I just know she's working her butt off in the air to this day with Phillip Carlyle by her side. Aerodynamics is scary, though. I won't lie. And the music in that film? Ugh! Phenomenal. Benj Pasek and Justin Paul really deserved all the awards for what they created.

Voicing Lola Bunny in Space Jam: A New Legacy was very fun for me. I got to voice my favorite character, who wasn't sexualized. I love Lola, I really do. I love that that made her more about her passion, which is basketball, then to make her this weird sexualized cartoon. Thank God that at least in that film, she wasn't. Focusing on her craft and passion for basketball was far more important and meaningful to me seeing as I was a basketball player when I was younger. Yet another full circle moment.

I won't go through literally every tv show or movie I've been in. My point is, I'm grateful and blessed to have experienced all of them. I however, am vastly disappointed that the two films I was a lead in, Dune 2, and Challengers have been moved up to 2024. I obviously am in full support of the writers and actors strike of course.

Especially as an actress myself. I just wish that I could've gone to the Venice Film festival this year. I miss Venice. That's all. I do think it's rather ridiculous that writers and us actors have to beg Hollywood for fair pay. It's disgusting, but I will talk about that another day. 2024 is going to be here soon, and I hope everything gets resolved by then. I don't really know where Euphoria stands. I could go without the show coming back for a third season, really. I miss the cast and crew, of course, but with the writer and actor strike going on, and the fact that we won't have Angus Cloud there…. I just don't know what's going to happen there. I don't think it'll be the same. And that's okay.

Getting to be apart of Project Backboard a few days ago really hit home for me. I miss playing basketball for fun. I hope that the kids at Oakland Middle got something out of that more than just a 'wow factor' of having 'a celebrity (or two) at their school'. I just want to help nurture the children of our future to become the people they want to be. Following your dreams should be at the forefront of all that they do. I just hope that I was able to help give back in some way. Oakland will always be in my heart. I grew up there, so I will always go back, wanting to help, wanting to be a light in some way.

I still can't believe that I won my first Emmy at 24! I was blessed with the award for 'Outstanding Actress in a Drama Series' for Euphoria back in 2020. That was the craziest night of my life, knowing that I could win or lose, and the people who had the awards were standing outside of my house, waiting for the announcement. And two years later in 2022, I won the same award again for Euphoria season two. I'm so blessed to have just been in the same categories as the amazing women on both nights!

Right now, I'm just chilling. I still have my home in California. I do miss London, and I will miss the home I picked out with my ex, but I sold that months ago. I moved on, and it's time to keep pushing, keep working, keep grinding. There are always projects being worked on behind the scenes. Most of which are modeling jobs as an ambassador for the businesses I mentioned like Lancôme, Louis Vuitton, Bulgari, and Smart Water, they keep the lights on. Aha. Some things that I'm working on, I keep to myself. My fans know how private I am. They know what's up. If they need to know something, they will. Some things I can't share due to NDA's and things of that nature, but some things I like to keep to myself, because I love the element of surprise. You'll never know what to expect from me.

As I said, it's about the journey, not the destination. Being so young, and accomplishing so much is just…sometimes, I can't believe it. It's crazy. I still have so many years to go, and I'm not stopping soon. 27 cycles around the Sun. Many more to go. So to all the years I've had before? You ain't seen nothing yet. Happy mother fucking birthday to me!!!

Xoxo, Zendaya/Daya

~ Archive Edition via twitter.

Alright. I know that this isn't your traditional 'para', nor, is it how one is "normally" written. I really tried my best to write a para almost story-like. But, it wound up being like a letter from Z to Z, from the older Zendaya, to the younger Zendaya. Or technically from me, about Zendaya and everything she's accomplished, really. However you wanna look at it. She has done so much since her career started, and I just wanted to showcase that she has come so far.

There's no secret how much I love Zendaya. If you read everything prior to this, you should know that she's my favorite (vegetarian) Virgo. As a Scorpio myself, I love me some Virgos!! I used to rp as Lauren Keyana "Keke" Palmer years ago, another Virgo, and I love Michael Jackson and Beyoncé as well.

A bit about me; I used to be a big Selena Gomez fan. But, I think it's crazy that Zendaya was someone I thought of as 'cute' while I was in high school during Shake It Up!, but I didn't realize until much later in life that she was one of the many kids chosen to be in the nationwide Sears commercial casting that happened. I remember hearing about that, wanting to go so badly, but I didn't have the money or transportation to make it to any auditions sadly. And looking back at the videos now, as I was pulling references left and right, it looks like they wanted actual kids, not teenagers. ;-; Anyway…

I do appreciate you all if you read this far. I really do. I may not talk much to anyone, but that's just because I'm so used to being a lone wolf and an outcast. That doesn't mean that I don't care for anyone of you that I follow. I hold a lot of you in my heart, and think about you often, I just, again, am so used to being alone/lonely/a loner….. bad habits die hard, for real. But I do make it my business to show love when I can. Because even though I may not talk much, all I wanna do, is show love, and give love in return, because it's what I desire to have the most. Love.

I have a few fanstagrams dedicated to Zendaya. I even attempted to make a separate fan account on twitter that was actually a fan account and nothing more, just so I would look 'normal' to the Zendaya fans that follow me, but I simply couldn't do it.

'Zendvyaa' is my home, you know? It's where I show my love that I have for Zendaya as a fan, and as a writer who just wants to write; I choose to rp as Zendaya too. If you don't like it, can't get behind it, or whatever. That's fine. But if you can't understand that I too, am a fan of Zendaya, that just shows it in a different way? Then my account really isn't for you. I don't mean to be rude.

Anyways, I do plan on writing an actual para soon. I have these feelings that I want to write as Zendaya/Daya, that I want to get out soon. I hope that when it does come out, you all show kindness, love, and understanding.

Happy 27th Birthday, Zendaya!!! <3 Thank you, Daya's writer. <3

#rp #para #celeb rp #indie rp #solo para #TATYIHB #solo: to all the years I've had before

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dachi-chan25 · 4 years

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OMFG! I can't belive I did read them all.

1.-Murder at the Happy Home for the Aged by Bulbul Sharma.

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So it wasn't bad but it wasn't exactly great. Had some intresting stuff worth exploring much, but the book didn't go there and I mean fine, the characters were pretty bland, I was hoping more definition to them but nope, still the book is a pretty straightforward murder mystery and it is entretaining.

2.-None of the Above by I.W Gregorio

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I absolutely loved it!!! There is still not much talk or information out there about intersex people, so I really think this book is great for intersex people to come forward and tell their own stories, I.W Gregorio wrote a very informative story and honestly is great, the characters are so human and that’s what I loved the most of this book it felt so real.

3.- Defy the Stars (Constellations #1) by Claudia Gray

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Claudia Gray made me fall in love with a robot (sorry not sorry) and I adore her for it. Ok so this book is great, it laids out such an intresting complicated future for Earth and what would happen if humanity did succeed in colonizing habitable worlds, honestly this book is so great and the romance the FUCKING romance is *cheff kiss* exquisite like I want them together forever and I can't wait to get to the sequel.

4.-Gone with the Wind by Margaret Mitchell

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Fucking god this book is a whole ass ride. I wasn't expecting to enjoy it at all I thought I would drag myself through it but nope I was turning the pages like a possesed entity, I guess that it helped the fact that I found all the main characters such insuffrable hateful people that it filled me with joy to see what fucking misfortune was gonna happen to them next. Honestly I thought this book was gonna be all white power fantasy (it had some of that and the fucking PoC representation in this book is atrocious like fucking disgusting how Mitchell dared to think slaves were happy as they were her idiot mind) and all the glory for "ThE CaUsE " but this book is surprisingly self aware and it shook me cause most of the main characters think the war was a stupid ass idea and the only think they miss is the privilege and position they lost and honestly the way that post war is portrayed is quite raw and yup honestly it was a great read even if there were moments that made me sick.

5.- Feminismo para Principiantes de Nuria Varela

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Un libro muy informativo y bien documentado acerca de la historia del feminismo y las diferentes olas y los momentos históricos que los ocasionaron. Me fascinó, siempre es un placer leer acerca de la lucha por el feminismo porque creo que al menos a mi me da una nueva perspectiva de porque es importante seguir luchando por un mundo más justo y equitativo para todos.

6.- Skyward by Brandon Sanderson

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I loved it!!! Spensa is so extra and she has my whole ass heart, I am dying for the next book to come out. That plot twist tho like I wanted to know what the Krell are and my mind was blown. This is the 1st Brandon Sanderson book I have ever read and I see why he is so succesful his stories are fucking bomb.

7.-The Tea Girl of Hummingbird Lane by Lisa See

This book made me ugly cry, it was so good and honestly I could see a lot of similrarities between how ethnic minorities are treated in China and how they treated here in Mexico and I depressed myself all over again about the unfairness of it all. The book was an amazing story of growth, healing, suffering... simply amazing, and I will definitely read more books by Lisa See.

8.-The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath

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Wow simply wow. This book has such an intense style such a way of taking you along the emotional and mental break down of Esther when she is faced with the world out side school and all this expectations she faces from her family, society and herself that it's just too much, that shit felt so real for me, I really liked it a lot but I don't think I'll be reading it again anytime soon cuz it really hit me too close being a woman that has (and still is) struggled with mental health a lot .

9.-An Assassin's Guide to Love and Treason by Virginia Boecker

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The plot of this book is completely outlandish BUT it was a welcomed respite after the intensity of "The Bell Jar" and honestly I fricken love Shakespeare retellings (like pls go read Hag Seed by Margaret Atwood y'all) and the Twelfth Night is such a silly fun play what is not to like??? The pacing is good, the characters are ok, the romance is good and it's an all around fun silly story (yes they attempt to kill the queen but who cares?)

10.- Fight Club by Chuck Palahniuk

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I had only ever watched the movie before and it low key annoyed me how every incel fan boy out there thinks the movie is the truest shit out there (cuz boooooy the toxic masculinity of the whole ass concept of a Fight Club all those edgy ass bitches Tyler Durden wannabes drawing anarchy signs in their notebooks that I have had to deal with *sigh*), but I absolutely love Chuck Palahniuk's books, his sense of humor is my jam and I knew there had to be more to the Fight Club than edgy fake depth and omg like it was so funny this book is about the dangers of toxic masculinity (half of the book I thought our narrator was in love with Tyler and I was like omg this shit is so gay how are those incels not seein this??) and that fake ass depth all those edgelords worship had me in stiches. Truly loved this book.

11.- The Lady from the Black Lagoon by Mallory O'Meara

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This book tho. Millicent Patrick was a fricken badass and such a wonderful artist and her story is so incredible. Like wow the film industry hasn't changed all that much huh? It was an amazing biography, I was crying by the end of it at the amount of love that went into all the research and how important it is to bring to light all these creative amazing woman facing the odds just to pursue their dreams, the thing I loved the most about the book was Mallory intertwining the story of her research with Millicent story like I appreciate all the effort it took her and it was amazing to read it.

12.- The Prince (Original Sinners #3) by Tiffany Reisz

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First off, how dare u Tiffany Reisz!!! That fucking cliff hanger. Now onto the book, wow, just when I thought Søren's life couldn't get more fucked up u proved me wrong, also why u make me ship everything, like now that I know what Kingsley and Søren's relationship was and how much Kingsley still loves him and wants to be with him aghfhfhhd, but also Nora and Weasley, he is so goddamn sweet and they love each other but thing is I don't think they will work out at all, cuz Nora and Søren are so much like each other (the parallels between the 2 of them were so clear) and their love is still there even if they are apart and whyyyyyy u make me suffer like this???

13.- Descendant of the Crane by Joan He

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This book is really great, all the construction of the lore and the political drama!!!! Like I live for that and I seriously need a sequel. A great fantasy with an amazing protagonist, those plot twists !!!!!! I never saw them coming. I just need the next book pls 😢😢.

14.-The Poppy War by R.F Kuang

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This blew my mind, honestly this month I read such great fantasy books. I wasn't expecting anything that happened (well I did guess about what Rin was but it was pretty clear) it broke my heart time and time again and I need to get to the sequel soon (like why do I do this to myself, I need to finish a hella lot of series and I just keep starting new ones like a dumbass).

15.-The Way of Kings (Stormlight Archives #1) by Brandon Sanderson

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💞💞💞 High Fantasy is my favorite thing in the world and this book, gosh i fell in love. The characters! The fucking world!!!! The political drama, the magic, the religion, (also all those drawings throughout the book were amazing) ahdhenmdhdj I adore when writers create whole ass worlds and this omg I hadn't been so excited about a high fantasy book since I finished the ASOIAF books. The story blew me away Brandon Sanderson dives right into it and I need to read the next book.

It was a great reading month for me tbh, I didn't think I would finish my TBR for this month but suddenly I did and it was because I got really great books and I hope next month will be just as good.

#october 2019 #wrap up #booklr #dachi reads stuff #dachi rambles

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