#i love me some traumatized fictional characters š
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Tag Game!
Tagged by: The wonderfulĀ @arcieleeĀ ššš
Your name? Maggie! (although lowkey I really should have picked a fake name to use on Tumblr because I am not a fan of my name at all, too many dogs are named MaggieĀ šš)
The last thing you listened to?Ā My favorite podcast, TheĀ Evolution of a Snake. Itās about Taylor Swift and itās super insightful and entertaining š
What are you wearing?Ā Sweatpants and a T-shirt, all black per my usual aesthetic
How tall are you? 5ā²3...I teach high school and most of my students are taller than me
Piercings?Ā Just the ears!
Tattoos?Ā None yet but Iād really like to get a specific song lyric on my forearm someday
Glasses? Contacts?Ā Glasses but they annoy me so I only wear them when Iām driving for the safety of others. I refuse to get contacts because I had a teacher once who told us about how he fell off a ladder and the force of the impact knocked his contacts behind his eyeballs and he had to get them surgically removed. I got traumatized-by-proxy.
Last drink? Berry flavored Gatorade Zero (I have food poisoning š)
Last thing you ate?Ā A single Saltine cracker (again, due to food poisoning)
Any pets? None yet but I LOVE dogs!!! We travel like 10 weeks a year so I feel like that would be stressful for a dog but Iāll get some one day.
Do you have a crush on anyone? āOmg, Ewan Mitchell ā„ And my husband, probably obviously.ā This was Arcieās answer and Iām keeping it because it applies to me too! š Ā
Favorite fictional characters? At the moment, Aegon and Aemond TargaryenĀ š And Iām sure this is a surprise to absolutely nobody.
A movie you think everyone should watch?Ā Rosemaryās Baby, Saving Private Ryan, Titanic, Accepted
A book you think everyone should read?Ā Memoirs Of A Geisha, Birds Without Wings, The Red Tent, Pet Sematary
The last place you travelled?Ā Pennsylvania to see family over Thanksgiving. But Iām taking students on a field trip to Japan this summer!!!Ā š
NO PRESSURE TAGS: @ladylannisterxo @imtheinvisiblequeen @lauraneedstochill @flowerpotmage @burningcoffeetimetravel @minttea07 @narwhal-swimmingintheocean @im-an-adult-ish @teenagecriminalmastermind @nenelysian @elsolario
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some of my favorite(*) books:
book lovers by emily henry- I know that at the bottom of this I just said I didnāt like most tt recommendations or romance but I actually really like emily henry. I would absolutely NOT compare her to Jane Austen (such a dumb thing to do, honestly) but I like the mix between romance and āwomensā fiction. book lovers is my favorite of hers (sorry beach read fanatics) because I really enjoyed how the romance between charlie and nora complimented both of their inner struggles.
raybearer by jordan ifueko- honestly I read this extremely quickly back in july so i donāt have many thoughts on it anymore, but i think i liked it so much because it was a reintroduction to african based fantasy, and also because of how valued friendships were.
the girl who fell beneath the sea by axie oh- to be honest, I donāt think I would like this much upon reread but thatās okay because I really loved it the first time around. mostly for the vibes and the friendship though because in my opinion the romance wasnāt very compelling/ there was no chemistry.
all my rage by sabaa tahir- I am first and foremost a sabaa tahir stan. would say that as opposed to how I felt about modern stuff being explicit in highly suspicious and unfairly cute, I did not like all of the name drops of authors sabaa is friends with at the end, but that is a small bone to pick. I will reread at some point and add updated thoughts.
legendborn by tracy deon- honestly there is a few things I could critique about this book, and if I ever reread it Iāll definitely have slightly more coherent thoughts on it. but despite my issues with it Bree, the main character has creeped into my mind and claimed a corner there. I will remain invested in her story for better or for worse. also, there are things that I really like about it!
pride and prejudice by jane austen- itās pride and prejudice what do I have to say that hasnāt already been said. 2005 movie supremacist.
howls moving castle by diana wynne jones- I will always always always always love howls moving castle. each time I reread it I forget jones is dead and then relive finding out š. Even though the movie adaptation changes a lot itās my favorite book to movie adaptation. I love it sm. diana wynne jones youāll always be famous.
*okay so reading. I read OBSESSIVELY as a child and then in middle school I kind of just. stopped. I guess, well, I still read fanfiction ā ļø but that hardly counts (donāt get me wrong thereās amazing fanfic out there, just the majority of what I read wasnāt) but then! traumatic event happened in my life and I started reading as escapism š but because I was reading to escape reality and because I wasnāt able to consistently go to a shop or the library I was getting most of my recommendations off of tiktok. and reading mostly romance. and I hated most of it. And this year Iām trying to branch out, discover my own unique taste a bit. but yeah, most of these will be super popular, apologies.
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What are your thought s abt Kim and harry? Saw ur post abt harry as an extension to eyes and was wondering if you see Kim seeing harry as Harry by the end of the good ending
I am not a gamer in any meaningful sense of the word, I had never played an rpg before DE but my friend who got me into it is super into rpgs in general. After that first playthrough she explained some rpg tropes i had no idea about, like the fact that it's super common to interpret chemistry between main characters and their companions just because they're...companions. They're helpful and concerned about you/the mc because that's their job in the game. I saw the appeal of kim/harry when I played the first time I think because I fell for this, basically.
Having played a few times now I find kim/harry as a romantic/amorous/they're getting married thing completely insane and not appealing at all. I can see them hooking up but the idea that at the end of the game kim is in love with harry I don't see at all. I also never saw what seems to be a pretty common interpretation of kim: that he was sitting in a room having no fun or life at all until harry came along and pulled him out of his shell. I see kim as having had his own entirely actualized existence and rich inner life, then getting himself put on this case and being distant at first because he's temporarily partnered with an amnesiac alcoholic then warming up as the investigation goes on because that's pretty much how it would go if this were a real situation.
I think the interpretation of their relationship comes down to whether you prefer a pretty objectively wild fantasy of romance or a more down to earth reading of them as how people would actually act. people like kim who actually exist do not fall in love with amnesiac drunks after knowing them for five-ish days. in a made up fictional story, sure they could, but because i personally related to that experience of kim's that is hinted at through the stuff about eyes (losing a parent at a very young age, losing a partner, being very closely affected by addiction, being subsequently traumatized, uptight, and hard to get to know) i absolutely cannot see how falling in love with harry is appealing because their characterizations feel more realistic than not and i don't see a romance for them as grounded in reality (even though this is fiction, i know, it's just like that). i get why a lot of people have turned it into a romance novel, it's just not for me.
at this point having played maybe 4 times i pretty much actively dislike harry and don't care about him as a character at all. the way he clings to dora is pathetic and how badly he's hurt jean is very sad. i can't see how wanting kim to be next on that train makes any sense, and i can't see kim being interested in someone who has hurt everyone around him so consistently and acted so selfishly for so long while barely apologizing let alone actually doing anything to make amends (that we can see). yeah you get a good cop point for saying kim is cooler than jean, but kim has no idea who jean is in that moment. jean could be as fucked up as harry for all he knows. people point to that interaction a lot as proof of their connection but i think it's more kim just appreciating someone standing up for him and being a little vain on principle, which he is. i can't see kim learning about all the shit harry put jean and everyone else through and being like š
so to actually answer your question, i think kim sees harry as a person by the end of the game but i don't think he's that impressed with what he sees despite what he says about harry's work considering he's coming down off psychoactives, nursing a concussion, and is generally exhausted. i think it's more him being relieved at having solved the case and being able to get the fuck out of there so he's able to look back like "that wasn't so bad actually."
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Nesta?
Thank you for asking me about my fave, @foxybananaaaz! Tagging @highfaenesta too because you also sent me my girl š
How I feel about this character: I donāt even know where to begin. Nesta Archeron is the first literary, fictional character who has made me feel fully seen on the page in terms of her emotional response to her particular trauma, which without getting into specifics is incredibly similar to my own. Thereās a line inĀ āWings and Embers,ā which, when I first read it, I crumpled into an emotional, gasping heap because I had never seen my own inner experience written so clearly:Ā
āShe didnāt know what to do with it, that rage. It still burned and hunted her, still made her want to rip and roar and rend the world into pieces. She felt it allātoo keenly, too sharply. Hated and cared and loved and dreaded, more than other people, she sometimes thought. Could sift between them all in a matter of moments, like she was trying on different sets of clothes, and no one could tell or care.āĀ
The irony is, in my day to day life, I donāt act or appear rageful. But getting to see a fictional character fully experience and at times act upon the rage I also feel, but am a regulated grown person who knows it isnāt healthy to act on my own rage in the real world in the same way, is cathartic, and badass (women are allowed to feel rage - Nesta reminds me of this), and validating, and just, yea, I could go on.Ā
Then we get to ACOSF where Nestaās particular traumatic response in terms of her inner life and experience of the world and herself in it, is also so deeply similar to my own, and my love and compassion for her (and by extension, for me - see how powerful that is?) only deepened. Thereās so much more I could say, but Iām grateful for this character every damned day of my life since I met her when I first read the series years ago.
All the people I ship romantically with this character: Cassian, obv. Because that quote above, that made me feel deeply seen? Cassian is the first person in her world to see that part of her as well, really see her, and not run or shy away. That is next level OTP right there. Nessian has my whole romantic heart.
My non-romantic OTP for this character: Gwyn and Emerie, her fellow Valkyries. Friendship on the page does not get any better than what SJM gave us in ACOSF between these three.Ā
My unpopular opinion about this character: My opinions about Nesta are all gonna be unpopular with someone š The two I think are unpopular with some of my fellow Nesta stans, though, Iāll go ahead and share, and they are intertwined with each other.Ā
First, I think Nestaās healing arc in ACOSF, as it relates to her feelings about her father, Papa Archeron, was handled beautifully, and in just the way I felt made sense for someone who does not want to be held down with the heavy baggage of resentment and hate toward a parent whose relationship with her was deeply complicated. (I know many people think narratively that Papa A got off too easy, but when I consider the generational trauma and dysfunction that he was likely in turn enacting --- we donāt know anything about his childhood, what kind of father figure he had or didnāt have --- I think the ruling on what he deserves or doesnāt deserve in the narrative becomes less black and white and a lot more greyscale, and I think where Nesta lands in terms of her feelings about her father, at the end of ACOSF, is the most healthy place for her to have landed. This is also super personal for me, which I admit, but how SJM handled Nestaās feelings about her father was on my shortlist of needs in ACOSF, and for what I was looking for in this regard, the book delivered and then some.)Ā
And second, I also think Nestaās healing arc as it relates to her traumatic response in terms of her spiraling anxiety and negative self-talk, was also portrayed realistically, and in a satisfying way for me (as someone who has experienced the exact thing we saw in ch. 50 before). This one I hope to unpack in longer posts someday after I finish my slow, deliberate reread of ACOSF, but for now, suffice it to say in this book I continued to feel really seen by this part of her experience as well, and it means ACOSF, for all of its faults which I can readily admit exist, will be a beloved, favorite book of mine always, despite its faults.
One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: I want Nesta to remain a main character (lol), and for the bargain she made with the Mother at the end of ACOSF to play an important role in the rest of the series. I also want a true but believable reconciliation of the three Archeron sisters in canon on the page, but I can see why we havenāt gotten that yet at this point in the meta series arc. And I want Nesta in the future books to still be her prickly self, even as she has access to inner peace a lot more now than she used to.Ā
Send me a character and Iāll break them down!
Past character posts: Mor | Rhys | ErisĀ | Elain
#pinned post#nesta archeron#acosf spoilers#acotar series#nessian#getting personal#ask answered#papa archeron#sarah j maas#acosf#a court of silver flames#foxybananaaz#highfaenesta#wings and embers#character asks
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all the questions of the shipping ask gameāØ
Sorry it took a while, i wanted to get on my computer. Also i copy and pasted the ones that were already asked.
HERE WE GO.
1. What was your first OTP?
Sabrina and Puck from the Sisters Grimm series. Probably one if the first series I read and even then I just knew that they would come together.
2. What is your current OTP?
HUMONNNN (hugh everhart and simon westwood) They deserved so much more š¢š¢ There isn't much of them on the books as a couple but all the head cannons have made me think they are the perfect couple and deserve the world. ššš
3. Do you have any OT3/OT+ ships? What are your favorites?
I do not have any romantic ones. If you count friendship i would say team sketch and the rampion crew. They were made to come together and be friends. ~found familyyyy~
4. What is/are your favorite trope(s)?
I love enemies to lovers. Like the whole time its just ĀØget over yourself yall are in loveeeeeĀØ Its so cute. There also always a little ĀØohĀØ and you know their whipped. I also like total opposites but same in a way coming together. Plus found familys. dont know if that counts as a trope but i like it.
5. What is/are your least favorite trope(s)?
Abusers to lovers. I don't understand it. I like enemies to lovers but when it gets physical I just cant. It's not right.
6. Do you have a certain kind of ship youāre more attracted to?
Hc Humon??? I think this is the same as #2(?)
7. Are most of your shipsĀ āpureā orĀ āproblematicā?
Problematic.
8. Who is the most shippable person you can think of?
what makes a shippable person
9. Are there any fandoms you donāt have any ships for?
No, by brain is love deprived so i find love in literature.
10. Do characters have to have canon interactions for you to ship them?
All the tlc ships, nodian and oscarxruby: Yes
Danissa and Humon: NO! GOD DAMMIT! (cannon no, hc yes, god i love fan fiction)
11. What makes a great ship in your own opinion?
I dont really know, you kinda get the vibe. Like you can just see how they act toward each other.
12. What drives you away from a ship?
Any type of abuse. Im a one strike and your out type person. Or when people just try and put two people together when it doesn't make any sense.
13. Is there anything you ship but refuse to interact with the community for?
i dont interact with the community in the first place i am s c a r e d.
14. Has a fanbase ever made you ship or not ship something? Why?
Humon, I didnt think of them much when i first read the book, but then i stumbled across some fan fiction and now i have been influenced heavily and i cannot go back.
15. Do you like/participate in ship wars? Why or why not?
I never have before.
16. Are there any ships you just canāt/donāt understand? What are they?
iko an kinney, they had one scene together, which they showed obvious hate, theres almost no fan stuff to persuade someone so i dont really get how people see it.
17. Are there any popular ships that you just donāt like? What are they?
Honey Harper and Ace or Leroy. I don't believe any of the anarchist were truly love with each other. (I believe Honey was attracted to Aces power but not much more.)
And hate me if u will I don't like Nobell or NovaxRuby. Ruby and Oscar are made for each other. Quite literally soulmates (in my opinion). So it feels weird to match them with other people.
As for Nobell, I just don't see it. One, I just kinda don't like cannon Danna. Head cannon Danna i would die for but thats off topic. Danna hates the anarchist, it shows multiple times throughout the book she believes the councils code is right. Nova doesn't. Plus Nova held her captive WITH THE ANARCHISTS and that has to be a bit traumatizing. They might mend their relationship but I don't think enough for them to be a couple (i see them as more of power badass besties / Brotp) Also I like Narcissa and Danna (for the same reason as oscarxruby). It would be a bit hard for them (again with the different views and all) but at least theirs no previous hate between them.
18. What is your favorite unpopular ship?
Mal and Evie from Decedants. "Sisterly Love" my ass they were in love and deep down we all know it.
19. Do you prefer fluff, angst, or smut for your ships?
All, im a little sensitive to strong emotions. Like i wont cry (usually) but if theres a cute scene, the either fluffy or angsty feeling will stick with me all day. As for smut, i like it but it doesnt stick with me after reading it.
20. Do you prefer bigger fanbases or smaller ones?
Idk, iv only ever been in smaller or dead ones. I hear that big fan bases get really toxic real fast (so may opinions and all so i get it). But i see... not mean but not entirely friendly people in small ones too. I guess small ones bc you can interact (even i get brave enough) with a lot more of the community and you can see fan stuff for almost everyone.
21. Have you ever received hate for a ship you liked?
Not personally but I know people hate Humon with a burning passion and i get kinda anxious that they'll hate me too. i get paranoid real fast.
22. Do you have any ships that you ship, but would never want to see as canon?
nope
23. Have you ever had a ship become canon, but you didnāt like how it was portrayed?
no
24. What is your favorite canon ship?
I have many, i love marissa meyers books rn so all of them im for.
25. What are your favorite ships from a dead fandom?
idk if sanders sides is dead, i recently got into it but theres not much. I like prinxiety and loganxpatton. Opposites attract.
26. What are your favorite shipping scenes?
i dont wanna go searching for all so here are ones that came to mind right now:
Wolfet: The train scene in Scarlet and literally all of Winter.
OscarxRuby(really gotta learn their ship name): the part where they played videogames. it was short but sweet. WHEN THEY CUDDLED ON THE STAKEOUT! when oscar asked her out, it was kinda weird (timing ya know. people literally just got massacured) but the little speech he made was really cute (what is up with confessing love right after someone dies in the books)
Humon: When Simon bid on the pie for Hugh when hes a cake lover. I love sacrifice (i also love food) and when Hugh ran to Simon when the bees hit attacked him, although it was kinda his job as a husband to do that. i dont have many canon ones for them.
Nodrian: the whole trilogy. how can u expect me to unravel all that in a few sentences. i just cannot.
Jacinter (pretty sure i did not spell that right): when he faked her death. It was G O L D and the way jacin sat bu her bedside 24/7 was so damn cute.
I have many more non cannon shipping scenes to canon. it didnt really ucure to be now that 1/2 my thoughts on books were fake.
i need help
27. What are your views on reader x canon ships?
Their cool. I dont personally read them much and when i do i never think of me in the situations. I read it as any other thing in short.
28. What is your best shipping advice?
Support what you want. Don't care if other people don't like it or harass you for it. You like what you want. If you want character a and b *(+) to be together do it. It's nobody's business but urs. (Unless it's pedophilia, abusive or any of that stuff the just stop)
*+ is for more than 2 people.
29. Do you like OCs (Original Characters)?
Yeah, I like OCs. Their creative and apart of the writer in some way.
30. What are some of your favorite shipping blogs?
ever interacted with them but i had one blog that i loved, it was all based on one ship i adored but THEY DEACTIVATED i miss u.
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It's been days and im still thinking about teen kaeya talking out loud to himself in Khaenri'ahian as he starting to feel like he's losing his identity and origins during his stay in Mondstadt-
Khaenri'ah being nearly forgotten and him being Diluc's shadow everytime they're together helped him get away from any inquiries. Although he never were able to escape Diluc's curiosity.
"How come you remember your mother language perfectly but not the name of your homeland?"
But Kaeya is used to lying and deceiving now, "Haha. Ironic, isn't it~?"
Neither Diluc nor the Dawn Winery's staff mind Kaeya's new habit.
No one dares to interrupt him or even look at his direction when he start talking afraid they might embarrass him
They smile to themselves as warmness spreads in their chests whenever they hear soft humming of some foreign song they assume or a quiet giggle.
Every sound and giggles sound as if he shared a secret with them despite them not understanding anything he's saying,
But that's the closest they felt to the teen that never speak unless spoken to, and hearing kaeya's smooth voice was a pleasant change to the usual quiet of the manor.
But that quiet soon returned intensified after Kaeya's first mission as a knight of Favonius.
And no canary or budgie can replace kaeya's melodical voice.
No one knew what happened that night, not even Diluc, his sworn brother, the one who founds him in one of Mondstadt's caves.
His first mission was a simple hilichurls camp clearing, any team of newbies could clear it with ease.
Kaeya was nothing close to a newbie, he was a kid from a royal family who has opened his eyes to what it seemed an endless war.
He learnt how to hold a sword before he could read or write. He was one of the few who passed the knight of Favonius exam almost instantly.
He wasn't worried about a thing, not even about the possibility that he have to kill who used to be his people,
He made his peace long time ago, he knows that even though they all grew from the same ground they're no longer humans.
They're no longer look human, they aren't even able to communicate or think. They follow their instincts in order to survive only.
"/They're closer to animals than humans../" he bitterly whispered to himself after him and his team finished clearing the camp.
But before he can sheath his sword, two abyss mages surrounded the area with a hilichurls horde three times bigger than the camp they just cleared.
The ambush frightened the horses of the knights sending them away. The only way out now was to face on the horde of the hilichurls and defeat them.
Kaeya already managed to kill a bunch of them and was able to call for his horse back and sent one of the injured knights back to Mondstadt so they can ask for reinforcements.
The fight was short after the reinforcement came, but kaeya didn't noticed he wandered too far chasing one of the cryo abyss mages that tried to escape.
"/You can't run away now, you shameful pig./"
The stillness of the mage when hearing kaeya's words after he cornered him in a cave alarmed Kaeya, especially after its shield suddenly went down throwing the mage on its kneels.
Kaeya takes a step back panicking as the mage is crawling towards him, extending its hand, "/... Prince?/"
Kaeya jerks his hand back dropping his sword when the mage hand reached his.
"/Prince! Where were you? What's happening?! Where are we-/"
The young knight unable to form a single coherent thought kicked the mage in panic before it can reach his feet.
' it..? '
The quietness that followed did nothing to ease his racing heart or shallow breathing.
Kaeya didn't noticed he broke the abyss mage's mask when he kicked them until the mage started to scream in agony holding their face looking at it through the small water puddle.
The whole ordeal already made his body wobble forcing him to lean on one of the cave's walls, but the mage's shriek was the last straw that broke the camel's back.
Kaeya pulled his knee close to his chest, hands on his ears, unable to tear his crying eye away from the mage.
Kaeya's sobs must've reached the mage's ears and they fully turned to him.
"/What happened to me Prince?! Why do I look like a monster?? Where's my wife and son?!!! Prince, please-/"
The mage was silenced once and for all by kaeya's agonized scream and dagger.
That night, the only thing the cave echoed was the muffled crys of a landless prince.
//
"Kaeya!"
Kaeya, still worn out after hours of crying, mourning, not sure what is he mourning exactly, but it was the only thing he was can do at that moment, couldn't push away the strong arms that was wrapped around him,
"Where have you been?? You were missing for hours after the abyss order ambush!! I was told you went after an abyss mage. I was worried sick.."
Diluc's wavering voice took what air left in Kaeya's lungs out. He wants to throw up.
Kaeya clenched the white fur in his hand and helplessly held on Diluc.
"Kae.. is that.. the mage's.."
But Kaeya couldn't hear anything anymore, he wants to crawl out of his skin, he wants to scream the emptiness out, he wants to throw up everything inside him.
But instead he held on to the only comforting warmness instead of the flesh-dusted fur that only managed to suffucate and weigh him down more.
#yeah i wasn't sure how to end it i just wanted to throw one hc but ended up with a small fic#the fur in the end was supposed to be the fur he's wearing now#and the texts between // are supposed to be khaenri'ahian#i wrote this on twitter first that's why it might look a bit weird o(-(#i love me some traumatized fictional characters š#this is kaeya x cruel fate fic i guess :D#genshin impact#kaeya alberich#genshin impact kaeya#kaeya#kaeya genshin impact#Diluc#genshin impact Diluc#diluc genshin impact#tbh I'm posting this on Tumblr to see how many people will like this or at least read it#do people read long posts by people they don't follow?#anyway#if you read this far i hope you enjoyed it <3
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