#i like to do weird stuff with paper
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old man's gambit
#x men first class#x men days of future past#xmen#marvel xmen#xmen fanart#charles xavier#professor x#cherik#3d drawing#i like to do weird stuff with paper#vintage#academia aesthetic#illustration#traditional drawing#traditional art#gay#gays#chessplayer#have a beautiful day
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Permission to headbutt: Granted (Patreon)
#My art#UT#Sans#Papyrus#Ft. something smol and I do on a regular basis ♪#This could be Handplates or it could be classic Undertale I leave that up to you lol#I definitely picked up a lot of the style quirks lol - but there are some of the ones that I like myself! Like Papyrus' darkmode clothes lol#And Sans' shorts having the stripe in the front haha - little details ♫#Realistically it probably is Handplates tho just based on where my head's at lol - I love the Handplates dynamic :D#Handplates#I talked myself into it! Pfft ♪#I found myself relating a lot to Sans especially while rereading - I want nothing more in the world than for my siblings to be happy! <3#So I gathered up a bunch of ideas of things especially me and smol do together and this was the most obviously cute one haha#Easiest to do! Tho I did still go a little extra on this lol#I'm trying to do more digital stuff ♪ It wasn't the best art day and I'm still a little nervous to jump right in :')#Not doing any sketches on paper beforehand feels weird but I guess it is thematic in a way lol#And I'm still pleased with how they turned out hehe#It really does feel nice to be drawing them again <3#And doing silly sibling things! Hehe#I dunno how clear it is since it's so ingrained into how smol and I talk to each other lol family language!#One of us will literally just announce ''bonk'' and the other will prepare for/lean in for a headbutt haha#She is a tiny bit taller than me - it's not quite /this/ extreme but she does lean down for me! S'cute <3#I like to think Papyrus would do the same hehe ♪ Let your lazy brother headbutt you! He can only reach so far!#On minimal effort anyhow hehe#It's just a fun way to be silly together ♫♪#Also yes I did show this to her and she cosigned lol - ''Cute'' -smol
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I had a scrap piece of paper and drew the little freakish dog 👍 I have been silently enjoying your art for like a couple months now? I found it randomly on uploaded Pinterest and was like “oh huh that’s rad” and yeah he’s such a lovely sad little beast
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#oooh another tiny machete sighting!#I don't know but I find it just so endearing that people are out there doodling his weird little face#on post it notes corners of scrap paper and at work#I do that too but then again I'm rotating him in my head at least fifteen times a day so I kind of have to#the WHISKERS ah#scruffy little animal#putting him in my pocket and taking him to the grocery shop as we speak#thank you! and I'm glad you've been enjoying my art!#I've always had a little difficult relationship with pinterest because a lot of art gets uploaded there without proper sources or credit#and whenever a piece of yours gets reposted sourcelessly often enough you kind of end up losing ownership to it which isn't fun#it gets used without artist's consent as bootleg prints and shirts and tattoos and such#but lately a lot of people have come to me saying they discovered my stuff through pinterest#or had seen my character there and recognized it later when they came across one of my own posts#and it's always very nice to hear that I'm glad you've found me here#but I'm getting very off topic didn't mean to ramble like that#gift art#answered#wwildcatt#own characters#Machete
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Jacked up the brightness obscenely on the menu screen after Romeo's fight. Looks like the papers are articles "about the plague" (pretty sure these are on some walls or the floor somewhere too; just wanted to note it's not unique here but omg what if there WERE unique papers from/to Romeo).
I'm just nosy af and wanted a peek
#remember how some of the papers in Geppetto's study are about a war#I HAD TO LOOK#I WANTED TO KNOW#ok I'm done I have to do work#I will be annoying another day#sorry someone's probably already looked here before AND I WILL LOOK AGAIN!!!!!#there are three chairs around the table which makes sense because that's how they are at the opera house#I have bad headcanon about that anyway though I HAVE BAD HEADCANONS AND I CANNOT BE STOPPED#re: Geppetto's weird papers on the war -- I feel like there's probably more stuff like that somewhere in the game#irrelevant but fascinating 2 me#lies of p#俺の
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steadfast sailor, paper captain...
#em draws stuff#hornblower#william bush#horatio hornblower#first and foremost! sorry for melting bush's face off in this image#but for a bit more context this is because I had the idea that a hornblower story based in 'the steadfast tin soldier' would be interesting#so here we've got pewter-cast model bush and paper theatre guy hornblower (and things are not going well for them!)#this one was an interesting challenge since I wanted bush to look like the metal was sort of melting out from under his paint#and then hornblower's paper hasn't quite caught alight yet but is starting to char at the very edges of him and where he's touching bush#both of them are much more complex designs than I'd originally been planning for (bush has got ball-and-socket joints and all...)#(the original original plan was that I would learn pewter casting and make him Real. as you can see I did not do that.)#but hey I'm pleased with how they turned out in the end! this took me three sharpe episodes to draw :|#(eleven episodes in and I think it made me weird in the head so I think I will slow down for the time being! too much riflery!)#aaaaaanyway. I don't know if I'll ever write anything about this idea so I'm releasing it into the wild if anyone else likes it#part of this was. an excuse to put some sequins on hornblower yes. fellow should sparkle a little more often!
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trying out a new type of watercolour paper so dave gets to be my guinea pig
#art#traditional art#watercolour#oc art#ocs#oc group: dave#oc: dave#im trying out some of the fluid student grade stuff. i like their fluid 100 fully cotton stuff but if i can find a non 100% cotton paper#that works well with my painting style my wallet would appreciate it LOL so far it seems good!#i paint kinda weird because i hate lifting so much i dont do it and i hate when it accidentally happens#its a technique that has a lot of uses but none for me HJFDHBFSKD if i make a mistake and i dont wipe it away fast enough with my finger#then its just there now. it was meant to be LOL but yeah i dont do lifting so i get like#irrationally angry when im trying to layer something and it lifts. which is always a problem i have with watercolour paper thats not 100#cotton. and also for some reason the mixed media paper i use does well with layering too so i like it#but if i can find a nice thick not as wrinkly cellulose paper that lets me layer that would be very nice hJFJDKJFD#but i'll need to to test out this paper more. its promising it let me layer pretty well with daves skin (tho the shading is a little light)#(but thats because i put too much water in the mix RIP) and it seems the colours that are supposed to stain arent lifting which is good#(so many watercolour papers ive used have made my most staining of staining pigments lift which always bugs me LOL)#but we shall see!
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made a cleaner version of that rising sun AE combination patch thing i had on the back of techno's jacket :]
some edits:
black lineart and white lineart
AE-colored and GAY!!!
#lost internet for 2-3hrs and made this while i was bored out of my mind#my art#uhhh what do i tag this as. that's like. That's It jhdjd#it's not really smpe or sb related exactly????? so throwing it in those tags would feel weird#sbpkmnau#technically#feel free to do whatever with this since it's transparent :0 not sure why anyone but me would use it tho lol#i looooove making transparent stuff like this oh yea woo yea#i might actually print a sticker of this tbh. i have sticker paper#hey watch this *makes something that is so personal*
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HAD A DREAM THAT. like my friend took me to this shop at like a mansion estate and there were butlers showing us around and the place opened up into this qhole warehouse with like little alcoves of stuff to sell right and the gimmick is that theyre all magical items or. maybe more like scps or something like they all did something and we were looking around and trying stuff out and it was pretty cool and then the butler gestured me over to this like plushy of like a stereotypical sexy cowgirl right AND IT HAD A VOICEBOX AND SAID LIKE. '' i'd be more nicer if i was more rounder'' WHIXH. RHYMED IN THE DREAM and i think it was like a doll that made your tits bigger and i was so shocked that this like 90yr old butler had seen through my boymoding that i immediately woke up
#there was some neat stuff like. im forgetting alot of it but there were all these little pieces of paper in a box that all acted as a tool#while only having the weight of a piece of paper like there was a tiny paper pickaxe that would break tinyyy chunks out of stuff#and there was a wall of like idk. monster parts set up like those pick&mix sweets with all the plastic tubs and they all had like weird uses#ans they were all rly gross like a chunk of flesh from something that you could yse to clean your teeth or a like sea urchin thing that#released like a cream for your skin when you rubbed it on yourself. also there was a manga shelf. and anime notebooks that#didnt do anything i think. if they did we couldnt figure it out
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Nothing pisses me off more than when people talk about my friendships with mid-support needs autistics and other people with differently-wired brains as if I am descending to help them because I’ve taken them on as a charity case. That is NOT true. Oh they’re a burden because they’re neurodivergent? WELL GUESS FUCKING WHAT: SO AM I! THE REASON I HAVE SO MANY FRIENDS WITH SO MUCH SHIT WRONG WITH THEM IS BECAUSE I HAVE A LOT OF SHIT WRONG WITH ME. WE ATTRACT EACH OTHER! WE LIKE EACH OTHER! IT’S NOT THAT FUCKING HARD TO UNDERSTAND!
#How about I just start strangling ableists from now on?#Would THAT convince them I’m actually this person’s real friend?#Literally nothing I say to them is able to get through their dense fucking skulls—#as if it’s sooooo hard for them to believe I actually enjoy their company#Also (halfway unrelated): if I hear “It takes a special person to work with special children” one more time I am going to SCREAM#Tell me I’m calm; tell me I’m patient; tell me I’m creative— do NOT tell me I’m “special” for doing a job I LOVE#Can you imagine telling a quantum physics major “It takes a special person to solve special math problems?”#😂💀 WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. I’m gonna start saying that to people from other professions. To see how they like it.#The children are not a burden to me; the children are very enjoyable to be around#and I enjoy troubleshooting what is preventing them from learning and coming up with workarounds for them#I made a glued roll of paper for a kid who constantly peels their skin because I saw them peeling crayons#It works!#I made math problems into a Skibidi Toilet role playing game for another kid who hides under tables when it’s time to work. It works!#You know why I was able to come up with either of these inventions? Huh? You wanna fucking know?#1.) I peel my lips and mouth and palms of my hands and calluses and cuticles and scabs; and#2.) I have awful executive dysfunction and have to do weird stuff to engage myself#People talk to me like I’m one of the “normal” ones; little do they know I’m getting assessed for ADHD and score 142 on the RAADS-R#and I essentially self-destruct when I get mad so I don’t break valuable items or punch through drywall and oak doors#I give myself bruises that swell a half inch high and form hematomas under the skin#I think I’ve permanently weakened the blood vessels and a vein in my right thigh from beating it so much#because it only takes one well-placed blow on my right; but several blows to my left#And I can see the bruise pooling towards my heart along the path of that vein from day to day after the initial beating#and sometimes it just randomly aches when it’s not injured; so I have to shift my weight when the kids sit in my lap wrong#so with that and something else I did to it not super recently that I should have gone to urgent care for… I probably have nerve damage lol#so it’s gross when people say such things about other NDs to me as if I am above them#Just fuck off already
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Some days I'm pretty content with my childhood other days I'm ripping my hair out because it just doesn't add up !! someone is hiding things from me !! I don't trust anyone !!
#im studying 'family as a psycosocial context' rn and its been pretty interesting!#and i was talking to my mom an article with an evolutionary perspective#bc we've talked before abt how this area of psychology can come off as dismissive abt socioeconomic factors & put unfair pressure on mothers#so i brought it up bc the paper didnt define parenting in terms of good/bad which was interesting !#but then at the end i said something abt 'the article talks abt abuse which obviously isnt relevant for me'#and she wouldnt answer me but her eyes were all watery and weird and I DONT LIKE THAT#like girl 😟 i was coming to terms with the occasional childhood neglect but abuse ? dont even tell me that bc what#like i know things werent perfect for me growing up but i hate how weird my mom is abt everything#and she starts crying if we get too much into it so i feel a little bad bringing it up#i also feel like when i do get new information abt something in my past it always makes me have a crisis#so maybe its just not worth it ?#bc i do feel like im in a rly good place rn and i dont need to know if i was 'abused' whatever that means#what i do know is bad enough and makes me sad as it is#i think the reason i get so paranoid abt it is because i have trouble remembering the stuff that has been told to me#and some vague things i do remember have been refuted ? so i cant rly trust my own memory#but idk if i can trust anyone else either#i mean i do trust my mom generally but shes so emotional and guilt-prone that im not sure what to believe#what i do know for sure is that there is a lot shes holding back in terms of what shes told me#which i dint love tbh#personal
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Ohh I would love to request a redraw of one of your strangels sketches ♥♥♥ if it's not too much trouble hehe, thanks!
Day 19 - The privilege ✨
#Requestober#Vargas#Edgar#Scriabin#Depending on your time zone it still might not be tomorrow yet! It's tomorrow for me tho#I just had no energy today lol I could not get my brain to focus on drawing at all#All that fun data - here's more!#Anyway lol#This happens to be the first redraw-request! Nice#Also for the record Brusk did specify this drawing behind the scenes lol I didn't just pick a random one#Lots of Scriabin resting his head in Edgar's lap around these parts#This was actually a way more challenging redraw than the ones I've done in the past :0#Since it's only been a few months - considerably less than half a year even! - my style hasn't developed much in the meantime#You'd think that would make it relatively easy to translate from paper to digital but no actually lol#Not me thriving on novelty and recent art is too familiar lol#It's good to know though ♪#And I'm still rather proud of the original so I was half like ''What can I improve here'' - I did improve some stuff! So that's neat#Plus I got to do weird stuff like with Edgar's halo and Scriabin's horn and tail! Neat#And kind of finally drew his wings digitally! Ah!#Still definitely want to return to that when I have time to dedicate to them properly haha
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#hate hate hate when you have to mail someone important documents if they dont send you any confirmation that they received them#like. i even wrote in the email that i wasnt sure which email address they wanted me to send stuff to#and im *pretty sure* that they checked that account and likely got my docs but. what if they didnt#also my anxiety levels are skyrocketing as is#i have to do so much stuff for work rn#plus this project im working on is. a trainwreck not gonna lie and my project partner is *not* helping#also my health insurance situation is still kinda weird#also the bone marrow donation agency (?) wants me to preemptively fill out some form about my health status and idk how to communicate that#im fine on paper but theres most likely something wrong#also my grandma passed away on saturday. yeah. thats also something that happened#right. sorry. once again i cant find my physical journal so. oversharing on tumblr dot com it is i guess
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what if my Void and @doktorpeace's Erato had spiderverse counterparts....and they were both spidermen.......and they kissed.........
#spitblaze says things#wip#ocs#void#masks#uh. lol this is what i was saying before#might have to buff les's design out a bit#but i think les's backstory is 'bit by the spider at a young age and it just didnt do anything for a long time'#'until the Inciting Incident where he got sucked into a black hole from a faulty particle accelerator'#'and instead of getting all Spots about it the spider powers managed to save him'#cause in his NORMAL story hes got like. sort of a metahuman autoimmune disease?#he already had a latent metatrait in a healing factor but once that got mixed with the weirdness of the black hole stuff it just became#les's atoms tearing each other apart and pulling themselves back together constantly and it hurt SO BAD all the time#i could go on a rant. the point is that in this case whats keeping him together isnt a healing factor but the latent spider powers#does he even need the web if he can just fall at terminal velocity in any direction to 'fly'?#no but hes also a weeb nerd who couldnt lift his way out of a paper bag#so like. probably for the best for him to develop a bit of muscle mass#anyway erato (spidrato)'s deal is that they're an artificial spiderman#i mean. obviously. robot. but like specifically made by the Spiderverse HQ#for the purposes of. idk. subduing rogue spidermen or something#either way their project was scrapped until Viceroy reactivated them and gave them purpose#anyway thats all i really have for them so far lmao this is way too many tags
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my fatal flaw is that i love notebooks and i love taking notes and i love reorganizing files and love to rewrite things and so i am constantly fielding the impulse to do nothing but rewrite the same notes in new configurations in different notebooks all day long
#N posts stuff#the binder was working really well for us for a while but now i'm like#'oh what if i copied a bunch of the notes from the binder into a different notebook for better readability/organization'#the notebook in question being a book i made myself by cannibalizing empty pages from an old notebook that i wanted to throw away#but it's smaller and more portable than the big binder is; since all the notes i want to retake are ones from Shows it's not like#portability is a major issue - i'm not ever going to go out in public to watch stuff to take additional notes - but my vision is WEIRD and#sometimes printer paper size pages are like. Too Big for my eyes to want to focus on (no idk how much sense this makes to me either)#but mostly i just like to rewrite things like i'm not Feeling Good and so it's like. idk. reassuring/soothing to just rewrite the same shit#as a kid i was like 'damn. i Fully do not understand why writing lines is supposed to be a punishment it is like Enrichment to me'#technically this fatal flaw is not a sin unless you have the subconscious internalized belief that it's Bad to not be Actively creating#and so feel guilt about rehashing comforting things as opposed to using the time to push yourself to write brand new things#so on one hand i DO have that on my shoulder but on the other like.. . pray tell WHO will stop me?
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I don't know how any of you stand being so kind all the time. It's annoying.
#my random stuff#delete later#These kind messages just keep pissing me off.#UGHHHHH#They're worded so sweetly you all sound like pushovers.#When I'm doing my weird villain thing and I ask for some kind of hero#gah#ughhhhh i'd want someone who would argue back and be meanish not some wet paper bag#ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh#(forgive her she hates everything)
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...
#so i survived my 1st week as a phd student. it's interesting. im not sure how i feel#the negatives are that i forgot how much stress being around people causes me. as a research assistant i was able to be on my own schedule#and go into the lab at odd hours so i never had to see anyone. but now im in classes and teaching and have a shared office#classes are tolerable stress wise so long as im sitting on an edge. i only feel a lil like im dying. teaching makes nauseous beforehand.#which is odd bc im not really worried while im doing it or before im doing it. i thibk its just that i have to interact ans i kno im a#mediocre teacher bc id rather die than do the back and forth of asking questions and u should teach interactively#i like to break down complex idea and help people with problems but i was not build to teach in classrooms. i get knocked off points when#i give class presentations bc i cant make eye contact lol. so that'll b annoying this semester. and its just so hard to function in an#office space. idk its weird like i dont even feel it that much while im there its just like a flashing *i need to leave* alarm. and then#when im alone its like a physical weight off of me. and i cant tell if thats what's draining my energy or if ive just cycled into a low#energy lul bc im just like. i wanna sleep. and for me thats always a sign that somethings wrong. i dont feel that bad mood wise but its#like there's a rock weighing me down as im trying to tread water. so those r the big negatives. the positives r that#i do enjoy being back in school. i love the structure of it. but im also self destructive abt structure so well see how it goes. but my#lab mates seem nice as does my advisor. i feel a bit bad bc ill have to learn genome stuff from the ground up. and today i was trying to#convey ideas to him like an insane person. bc i dont have enough background to talk fluidly abt my prospective project and i have a picture#of what i mean but not all the details. hopefully i made some sense. i think the idea is cool. and thats the other really positive thing.#the papers i have to read associated with this project r waaaaaaaaaay more interesting than anything i ever had to read for my masters. like#they're the types of papers i would force other ppl to read for lab meetings. so im optimistic abt not hating it by the end haha#yay for being excited abt science. but i guess thats the other thing i feel bad abt. like im interested but haven't read a lot to prep bc#i cant express how difficult dyslexia makes things but also i cant control how interested in things i get so i bassically banned myself#from reading papers im actually interested in like 3 years ago bc in retrospect i was prob going thru a hypomanic episode#and i was like reading papers abt microbes in Antarctica all day and not working on my stuff. and i just remember walking into the lab at#like 5am to trasfer alage with tears streaming down my face bc i was just like. i cant have this nice thing and b functional. it has to stop#so i just created this weird barrier in my mind where im not allowed to read fun papers. so its odd to b reading them now for work. its odd#also i was walking to my office worring abt things and then i saw some moss growinf around the edge of the sidewalk and it made me wanna cry#bc i am an extremely normal individual. i have normal feelings abt photosynthesis. but anyway yeah. its been interesting#hopefully ill stay optimistic. next week we have a orientation for new grad students. and i might have to drive like an hr away. hate that#the driving i mean. not the orientation. that should b fun#unrelated
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