#i know there no such a thing as BAD or GOOD marketing
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♰ 'bout damn time ༻ C. HOWARD.*ೃ˚
➻ masterlist. ➻ buy me a coffee!
CW ➻ mention of being a little hungover ⋆ Cooper being rude to Lucy (as always) ⋆ lowkey lovesick Cooper ⋆ other than that not much ⋆ if i missed anything, lmk!
PAIRING ➻ the same reader x Cooper relationship from this drabble series!
SUMMARY ➻ after a while of travelling, seems all Lucy had to do was get rid of the Vault suit. OR, many times Cooper is nice to you, and one time he isn't mean to Lucy. WC ➻ 750~.
AUTHORS NOTE ➻ i'm taking a short break from writing! no longer than a few weeks don't worry! college finals are getting closer, plus life's getting pretty busy so i could use all the time i can get to take it easy and not over work myself. so here have a cute silly fic before i go on break 😁
© 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒 𝐇𝐓𝐂𝐇𝐍𝐑. 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐲, 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦, 𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫!
Lucy notices Cooper's deep care for you through both little things.
those things would include giving you the first cooked skewer of meat off a fire, (not before he takes a piece off to taste or see if it might make anyone (you) sick.) he always has you walking in front of him, then Lucy in front of you. wether he does this so he can stare at your ass all day, or to make sure he can always keep an eye on you she'll never know.
he lends you his hat from time to time, mainly when your headaches are bad or he notices you could use some cover from the harsh sun of California. Lucy's even seen Cooper lend you his duster if it's particularly cold at night. hell, he even allows you to snuggle up to him for extra warmth. she mainly thinks he allows this so he can keep better watch on you, but a small part inside her thinks that he likes the comfort of your body against his.
despite him knowing you can more than handle yourself in a fight he always puts himself first, as if to scope out any possible things that could happen and catch whatever bad things come first.
and perhaps the thing Lucy has grown to adore the most, is watching Cooper wordlessly extend a hand to you — wether you fall behind a little and he reaches to hold your hand, or to help you get up. it almost feels like she's invading something intimate and personal when she catches glimpses of the actions.
the market is loud and busy, full of people buying and selling a wide range of things. you had moved through town in the hopes for a hotel, the last bounty having paid more than enough for a few nice nights of sleep.
"hey, you need anythin'?" Cooper asks from beside you as the three of you walk through a busy market. "i'll do an extra poke 'round for whatever."
you nod, "i'm good i think," you reply, and Cooper looks at you with that 'yeah sure' look, as if to nudge you to think harder. looking down at your thin coat, you sigh, "okay.. maybe if you can find a better coat anywhere? winter's coming up and it would be very nice of you?" you smile at him, another warm autumn breeze blowing past.
he nods, scarred fingers rolling the caps around in his coat pocket. "well i would like some-" Lucy speaks up.
"zip it Vaultie, didn't ask." he huffs, raising a hand to pat your shoulder. "i'll be back," he nods to you, looking over your shoulder to give Lucy a sour, unamused look.
you nod back, "if we're not here in a bit we'll probably be back at the hotel, my feet are killing me and last night at the bar was too much," you groan, rolling your shoulders. Cooper nods, walking off.
you huff with a small smile before moving along the market stalls to peruse for more med supplies. Lucy scoffs behind you, walking up to your side. you look over to her, brows twitching with tired curiosity. "hm?" you hum, as if asking her what's up.
she shrugs, "how does he keep doing it?" she asks, her face displaying her confusion and frustration.
you shake your head, looking over at a stall. "what do you mean?"
"switching like that," she adjusts her backpack. "he's shockingly nice with you, asking you if you need anything, then when i pitch in all of that is gone and he snaps," she huffs.
you wave her off, "it's nothing personal," you reply, eyes glued to a stall selling a bunch of clothes. "well, probably anyway." you pull Lucy along with you, stopping before the stall. "you know what might lessen his snappy-ness towards you?" you turn to her, her big doe eyes blinking back at you.
"what?" she answers.
"getting rid of that Vault suit." you point to the massive crate full of clothes. "pick a few things out, i'll pay, and we'll call it a uh, little experiment, yeah?"
she thinks for a minute, the Vault suit did have it's benefits, but it was also a blaring neon sign telling people where she's from. which Lucy has learned the hard way that that's usually not beneficial anymore. she nods, hands moving to start sifting through the pile of clothes.
the sun has long since set by the time the two of you got back to the hotel. you had briefly looked around the market for Cooper, but upon not finding him you decided to just head back to the hotel. you sluggishly walked up the steps, occasionally eyeing Lucy's new clothes. it sure took some getting used to, not having that hideous Vault suit to look at.
you stepped up the final stair, walking through the short hall until you reached the door of the room you were renting. you unlocked the door, finding Cooper lounging on a chair in the corner of the room. "hey," you offer, letting Lucy walk in before closing and locking the door.
Lucy eyed Cooper as you two came it, watching for any change in his expression. yet, she got nothing.
he groans as he gets up, grabbing his hat and chucking it on the bed you and him shared. he reached for something that laid on the bed, then chucked it your way. you caught the item, moving it around in your hands — a thick coat.
you grinned, "thank you! it looks my size too!" you put on the coat, grinning as it fits almost perfectly.
he cracks a small smile, nodding. "not a problem, dollface."
Lucy looks between the two of you, watching as you take the coat off and throw it over a chair. you set down your heavy bag and pull your boots off, throwing yourself face first into the bed. god that feels good, you think to yourself.
Cooper huffs, throwing his duster over your new(ish) coat. "c'mon move those legs, else you're sleepin' on the floor." Lucy's eyes widen, he'd never, right? though the tone in his voice doesn't hold an ounce of seriousness. well, just the part where he asked you to move.
you groan into the mattress, mumbling something he can't hear. "c'mon, move it doll," he grunts as he kneels on the bed, strong, scarred hands gripping your thighs as he shoves you to one side of the bed and goes to lay down not before landing a crude slap on your ass. he rests his head against the headboard, his hat tipped forward to cover his eyes.
you let out a long, tired sigh, turning to face him. you lay beside him, hands idly fiddling with one of his belts. you lean in closer, voice hushed. "y'know," sleep lacing your voice. "managed to get her to ditch the suit, it'd be nice if you would say something,"
Cooper's hairless brows furrow as he sighs. you let out a yawn, nudging your head against his shoulder as you slowly drift asleep, hands merely resting against his hip.
Lucy always finds herself quietly observing you two, watching the little strangely affectionate gestures between you and the man who seems to have it out for her. like now, she watches him sigh deeply, before lightly shaking his head.
"hey Vaultie?"
Lucy nearly jumps at the sound of his voice, even though it's quiet as to not wake you.
"yeah?" the corners of her lips almost twitching.
"'bout damn time you got rid of it."
Lucy's lips pull into a small smile. the comment might not have meant much to anyone else, but to her it was neutral, rather than his usual hostility. and she'll take any win, no matter how small.
TAGLIST ; @live-logs-and-proper @looonytooons @seeingstarks @thewastelandwriter @lacey-mercylercy @marina-and-the-memes @p4rsuade @anonymous-creep @likoplays @iceviolet11 @https-junebug @silverose365 @athanza @songbirdemerald-blog @justt-myth @looneylooomis @v3lv3tf0x @keyofgigi
#⋆୨🩷©2024 htchnr#⋆୨⭐️cooper howard#cooper howard x fem!reader#cooper howard imagine#cooper howard oneshot#cooper howard x reader#cooper howard#the ghoul oneshot#the ghoul imagine#the ghoul fallout#the ghoul x reader#the ghoul#walton goggins#walton ghoulgins
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WIBTA if I left a bad review on a book I haven’t purchased?
(📚📖 to find later)
I’m an audiobook narrator professionally. I do most of my work via independent contracting with a production company. NOTE: they are NOT a publishing house. They do not provide editors/betas/etc for the text, they focus on turning (usually self published) books into audiobooks and marketing those audiobooks.
Most of the books I record with them are great, and I have a lot of fun reading good books! But…some of the books I’ve read for them have been. REALLY. REALLY. bad. Like I personally would have stopped reading within the first few pages bad if it wasn’t literally my job to read the words out loud.
I’m currently reading a book for them that makes me want to tear my hair out. The writing is boring, badly paced, and repetitive. None of the characters are likeable, and the relationships are shallow, the combat is boring, there are no stakes, etc etc. To give you an idea, the main character is the type of kid who on the playground would insist he had a mega super invincibility shield so you couldn’t touch him, but he also had a mega super invincibility shield breaking sword if you decided you wanted a shield too. And the narrative REWARDS HIM for acting that way.
I’ve never left a review on any of the books I’ve narrated before, but this one…i am seriously considering writing a review to try and warn people away from this book.
A few things to consider, though:
1: i am not being paid royalty share from the book, i get a flat rate based on the number of hours in the final audiobook. But as far as I know, the author only starts making money from producing this audiobook once the production company makes back the money they paid me for making it.
2: i would review anonymously/under a fake name and only on the book product page, not the product page for the audiobook version.
3: if an audiobook does not sell, then it is most likely I will not be obligated to continue recording the rest of the series (and it IS a series. At least three books are out as of now. I am currently slated to record them all, provided the audiobook sells decently)
4: the book currently has ~250 reviews already, and a 4.7/5 rating (how???? get some fucking standards), so it’s not like I’m leaving a 1 star review on something that only has 6 reviews.
I don’t think that one bad review would tank the whole series, but I do feel like leaving bad reviews on a product I didn’t even buy might be a dick move, especially if the author’s pay for this book relies on it selling well. But on the other hand, his book sucks and people should know that.
I wouldn’t be leaving a “0 stars: this sucks” review, I’d want to make it comprehensive and detailed. But I’d also feel bad about that because I’m sure the author reads his reviews, and even though his book sucks shit, i don’t want to like…make someone lose their passion to write? But ALSO if you’re making people pay $16 for the book and/or $40 for the audiobook, maybe the book should be fucking good? Idk.
So, tumblr, WIBTA?
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Hello Cowboy Jen! I was wondering if you had any advice for me
Here’s the situation- I’m a young lesbian (I’ll be 17 going into college) and I’m going to study geology. I’m assuming my classes and later on my work environments are going to be mostly men since geology is a male-dominated field. Any advice for being in spaces without very many women? And picking a different field’s not a very good option either, geology’s been my obsession since I was five and I doubt I could give any other field as much attention and focus.
When I was DEAD SET on being in the DNR or a Forest Ranger or some kind of Park worker I was in my tweens and early teens. I loved the idea of working with people and animals and outside and getting to use my hands and my knowledge of land and history. Then some Jack Ass at the Corps of Engineers station I volunteered at told me women couldn't really do the job right and it was too dangerous and I lost confidence. I stopped going and didn't reapply for the Mayor's Youth Parks program I had worked at for two years. I just left the idea behind.
I see now all the older women park rangers that are around and read stories of women like my current boss who was a naturalist for years in our county. I work at a nature center almost entirely staffed by strong women with the exception of the CEO, the marketing guy and one outreach guy. If I had seen any of these women in my teens i would have said "heck yeah women can do this".
You are going to be that leader, that beacon. That is a thought to keep in your pocket on hard days.
The truth about working with men is, in general, they don't really care and they kinda just feel awkward. They lack social skills around women so they end up saying the dumbest stuff. I am not saying men can't be total pains in the ass or feel threatened by you being around, they absolutely can. At the end of the day we are all human and women are 50% of the population so at some point they have dealt with women in class or at a job.
Mostly just start off with giving everyone the benefit of the doubt. Saying stupid stuff to try and be funny is not the same as harassment or hate. If you don't feel offended or insulted or threatened don't try feel like you are because you think you are supposed to be.
Look them in the eye, do listen to those who have good things to share, teach or discuss. Don't dismiss men for being men. Just as many humans, they want to share what they know and tell you what they have learned. I have been taught so much by the men I work with at the farm but I had to tell myself to listen and not just paint them in my brain as being bossy or mansplaining.
Don't shy away from questions when you need help. Ask when you need to ask and thank them for helping when they do. If you are interrupted by them say "I am not finished, please wait your turn" or something similar. Stand up for your right to share what you know or to get more information when you require it.
Basically, think of men as neutrally as possible until one proves he is to be avoided or ignored. Listen to your gut if you feel unsafe or degraded and keep notes on that behavior. If you must, tell your professor or a dept head if you feel like the bad actor will continue or possible endanger you.
Once you learn your trade you can recruit other women and share your love of your job/degree and some day it will not be more men than women around you!
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#salamence#THIS one is a good one. someone else mentioned the chin and claimed they look like lord farquaad. and would say “why YES this is Divine” and#i didn't like how accurate that was. anyway dragon/flying 4x weakness to ice my belovèd. if anyone says ice is bad#keep in mind how much of the competitive landscape it totally nullifies. ice is like. probably my second favorite type. behind electric#even though none of this is about salamence. they've got the whole primary colors thing going on but minus yellow#red and blue. red white and blue. american pokémon? big red wings that're just Flat. i really dunno what's happening here i just know it's#supposed to be really good in competitive. and also they got a paradox form which i Guess TPC is trying to market as totally new unrelated#pokémon but i'm always going to call them “paradox hariyama” and such instead of ~iron hands~ or whatever they're supposed to be called#don't want my pokémon names to have two words in them……
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fr tho @staff why are you trying to make tumblr more like other sites why are you destroying your niche in the market please there have got to be ways to make tumblr more accessible to new users without sacrificing the very things that your existing userbase loves
#its a genuine problem... I have had friends sign up for tumblr and then not use it because they dont know how to navigate non-algorithmic sm#but come on. there have got to be ways to build up the onboarding process so that people learn how to search for blogs + content#and/or ways to create separate contained algorithmic feeds OR to create the option to turn the algorithmic feed off like it is rn#and honestly I do think tumblr's focus should be more on 'how do we convince people non-algorithmic is good'#rather than 'how do we become algorithmic'#there's gotta be a whole angle in there right??? something like emphasizing that on tumblr you find the content YOU want#not the content we want you to want#also the whole thing about drawing in new creators. have they talked to existing creators??????? bc I dont know that they want algorithms#i dont know I just think tumblr will never be able to do the algorithm better than sites like FB or tik tok or even twitter#so if they try to become algorithmic they will fail to meet the standards of new users AND they will drive away the existing userbase#its a bad look. this is your niche. play to it. thats marketing 101
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I get hating certain political systems and trying to abolish totalitarian regimes but at the same time many of them are so interwoven with our history and society they have become tropes and when I consume media with a setting where the monarchy is absolute and revered then I am playing my part and sucking that princeling off
#litchi.txt#there are games that address this kinda stuff! and thats good! its good that there are games talking about how this is bad!#but at the same time when I go into a game knowing I will be the prince's sword and shield I dont expect the game to be anti-monarchy#despite having pretty strong opinions on many a thing I tend to put most of them away the moment I engage with media#imperialism bad. monarchy bad. doesnt mean I cant enjoy roleplaying in a game where I help these systems#because guess what its fictional and not everything needs to be a strong statement about politics#sometimes we just... wanna vibe with a setting#I am so very thoroughly exhausted from the politics in this country and where things are going I just kinda need that no brainer gameplay#even if it means working as the secret police for an emperor#even if it means replacing one dictator with another#because its still a game#a lot of people talk about imperialism-monarchy-colonialism with these things because they are a big issue even today#and they are important to talk about!! in real world!!#but I rarely see people be this upset about like religion etc which like. thats also a massive problem.#idk Im just tired of trying to look at fanart of all my fantasy medieval games and people being upset that the games#are not super anti-monarchy despite the marketing being literally 'you are the emperor's bestie. you help him out and go on a quest.'#'your quest is to manipulate local government to support the emperor and do his bidding'#like idk how That is supposed to be a game that addresses it properly#and maybe it does but ig since the MC doesnt look at the player and go REMEMBER KIDS! THIS IS EVIL AND BAD AND WHY MONARCHY SUCKS#it doesnt count??? I guess???
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Anyone else think short form social media based on algorithms designed to promote topics that create more engagement instead of more joy, the idea of fast fashion but conveyed through social media, and the fact you can monetize suffering and outrage better than ever has largely resulted in the death spiral of media literacy and the mass emergence of bad faith readings?
#I may be venting a lil but god it blows my mind#fyp is a blessing and a curse because i don't think ppl were ever meant to be subjected to this many ppl at once#god i took a bird site hiatus for weeks and now BARELY check it and it already feels like a hit#oughhhhh#even fandom spaces have hugely incorporated marketing and networking into them bc of cmms and sponsorship and building portfolio#which would be fine tbh if it weren't for the way socmed is designed#now it's like you can't support too many ppl or else you're shadow banned or you have to make yourself palatable and marketable#and websites with threads in which people will only read the first post before qrting because ratios are seen as five minutes of fame#features that permit beating an algorithm are locked behind a paywall that promises you money if you go viral#and what goes viral is usually incendiary content meant for those ratios or trends. whether for or against OP#even in hobbyist spaces the climate has changed so much due to the monetization and marketing and just. ugh#not to mention side accounts dedicated to gossip in this new priv account culture like...idk#if you have to make another account so you can make fun of a friend on main with selected priv friends it just doesn't sit well with me#and not every priv account does this but enough do and it makes me tired#unsolicited hate comments are still as bad as they used to be on ff dot net except now people openly are proud of it more#why do most socmed feel like passive aggressive sticky notes on high school lockers#there is so much more I could say about everything that has left me weary about the internet but I don't know the time or place#and I don't want anyone to think this is about them because it's a general statement. though if you are doing the more inflammatory things.#maybe rethink that. it's not good for anyone else and it's not good for you either#I keep coming back online to check on ppl and see art and I *know* it's draining for my health every time#but I feel a lot better now that i use socmed less overall. and that I try to focus on what makes me happy#it just sucks seeing so many people i care about endure absolutely wild struggles bc people online do not care.#I like rambling in my tags because this is the only place I ramble except my personal journal and to my wife
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I think people overestimate how feminist team black is. If someone brings up how Baela should be the heir to Driftmark, it's always "she would've been Queen if not for the Greens!", ignoring that 1, she would be Queen consort, not a Queen in her own right, and 2 she has a legitimate claim in her own right to Driftmark. Team Black's goal is to crown Rhaenyra, but Rhaenyra becoming Queen isn't a win for feminism because it does nothing to dismantle the rest of the patriarchal system that exists in Westeros. From what we've gotten so far, it reads that Rhaenyra wants to be the exception and not the rule. Rhaenyra has made a lot of bad political decisions, which means she can't acknowledge Baela's claim because it would weaken her own claim (blatantly admitting her eldest sons are illegitimate would not end well for her to say the least). So she betrothes Jace and Luke to Baela and Rhaena to kind of atone for that, like as a consolation prize Baela will be Queen and Rhaena will be lady of Driftmark, neither of them would hold either title in their own right. It's good matches because the kids like each other and will treat each other well, but it's not a feminist win or a feministic liberation. It's usurpation, usurpation that takes place because Rhaenyra has to do damage control after having illegitimate children and after a serious of bad political decisions (both hers and her fathers, Viserys is the arbiter of this entire mess). To me, Rhaenyra is very reminiscent of Mary Queen of Scots, I can see a lot of elements drawn from Mary's history in Rhaenyra's story and character, down to their sons eventually taking the crown they failed to claim/keep.
#hotd#hotd spoilers#house of the dragon#house of the dragon spoilers#Rhaenyra targaryen critical#I'm going to do a rewatch prior to season 2 & I'm going to analyse the bad political decisions from vis & Rhaenyra that lead to the dance#like by no means the only factors at play lets not forget otto daemon larys etc#but it's an interesting factor that the fandom doesn't really acknowledge#and a lot of Rhaenyra's bad political decisions are understandable because of her youth and because viserys does fuck all to prepare her#like even if she wasn't who he choose as heir she should've been given a better political education as a princess#but vis fails his most of his other four kids in that regard to#i mean he also fails to acknowledge them or remember them but anyways#he is a huge part of the reason aegon and aemond became he they did#props to whoever probably alicent for sending daeron to oldtown so he could grow up well adjusted#alicent: i'm writing a letter to daeron is there anything you would like to say to him?#viserys: daemon? why are you writing to daemon?#alicent: daeron?#viserys: who?#alicent: our son? the one you sent to squire in oldtown?#viserys: i think i'd remember if we had a son who's name was one letter different to my brothers#viserys: in fact i do alicent do you mean the one who lost an eye?#alicent: *screaming internally*#viserys targaryen#king viserys#rhaenyra is such an interesting character but i hate how the fandom sanctified her because how dare characters be complex and have flaws#like you dont have to justify their actions or bend over backwards to deny their faults to like a character you know 😭#and the same thing is done to daemon who is far more fucked up and far more flawed in the show than the fandom allows#i hate the team stuff tho i get hbo going for it as a marketing move that was genius but my god are certain stans insufferable#the entire point of the dance is that its a pointless tragedy there's no good or bad side theyre both awful in their own ways#but thats a longer rant for another time outside of the tags
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Really enjoy the theory that Sonic x Shadow Generations was named that way so that search results would show the game instead of Sonadow
This is particularly because of how much more Sonadow fanart/edits/fanfics I've been seeing as of late BECAUSE of the title LMAO
#like actually the best and worst marketing to have sonic x shadow gen come after all the gay ass clips we saw in Sonic Prime LIKE–#Frozen made people forget about the whole Walt Disney's body preserves in ice thing#Sonic x Shadow did the opposite LMAO#god I fucking love gay people I wish they were real#god I fucking love hedgehogs I wish they were real#literally don't know who at Sega thought they could stop people from being gay#bro we are literally spreading homosexuality and indoctrinating children#^^/J /J /J /J /J /J /J I SWEAR /JJJJJJ#I like to imagine there was one younger employee in the conference room trying so hard to be like 'guys... this isn't gonna work...'#and the ceo goes 'ofc it will! what'll they do? call it canon? make more art?'#cut to the present the ceo is all: 'un-fucking-believable'#'these bitches gay... good for them... BAD FOR US'#sonic the hedgehog#shadow the hedgehog#sonic#sonic fandom#sonic x shadow generations
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every day im glad that i only encounter popular video game discourse from 2000 miles away
#man every time i hear about it it just sounds so backwards#blah blahblah BIG GAMESTUDIO blahblah thing is OBJECTIVELY GOOD/BAD blahblahplaymoregames#like bro your discourse vocabulary is 20 years behind the times#you are trapped in the console war era thinking of caring more about companies than the art itself#bet you dont even know piracy#then theres the odd guy who unironically believes marketing is effective at causing mass social degeneration of taste#i know where youre from . lay off those steam forums mang the “normies” arent in this room with us right now#you need to learn to say “i dont like the current trend” without moralising it ok
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I hate how the only acceptable response in front of personal tragedies is fear and commiseration. I'm angry I'm angry I'm angry and I despise how it gets me condescending looks instead of the pity support that fear would get me instead
#i hate it so much because when you don't talk people don't take you seriously#but when you do talk you have to watch your tone and your emotions because otherwise “#'you're making too much of a scene' or 'oh i didn't know it was that bad'#or 'other people have it worse'#or 'you should have said something sooner'#The sad thing is that it all comes from people near me or from professionals#apparently having more than one bad thing going on at the same time annoys people around you#who feel like your trying to rob their spotlight with your shitty life#god i hate it here#and let's not talk about the money required to get good treatment#and time#and the precariousness of the job market#I'm so scared#it's just not ny fault that my first response to fear is reacting#roba mia
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I have this thing that happens with longer personal writing projects where I go, “what would the query letter to an agent look like” - partially bc I’m a creature of habit and want to publish everything, partially because fits about focusing on the through line and can help me figure out the core of the project.
And right now it’s very much like, why should anyone care about my lil guys? What are their journeys and what is compelling enough to encourage people to go beyond the first paragraph, let alone the first page?
Which in turn leads to the question of like, why am I compelled by these stupid guys?
And honestly, it’s because I sat them down and gave them my issues and pushed them to the point of absurdity and said “go live with that for a while and get back to me” and now they’re fucked up in some pretty fun ways and I like writing about the hopes and fears that it inspires
But I’m still like, questioning why anyone else would care about this, beyond the queer rep
#I live in fear of writing a book for publication and the marketing resting solely on the queer rep#like yeah nothing I touch is straight obvi#but also this isn’t going to be for people that expect family values#there’s a lot of myself in this which isn’t Great but also not the bits you’d expect#I love by the ‘art should disturb the comfortable and comfort the disturbed’ mantra and this really hits that#but it’s also very sad and I can already picture the kind of drama this is going to inspire#I hope this is what gets published. I hope it blows up booktok. I hope breadtubers make videos on this work because no one knows#what the real takeaway is#bc tbf there is no good takeaway beyond the fact that people can love you#with all of their hearts even#but it’s not enough to save you or prevent bad things from happening.#the love is there and casts its hue to the world but a knife is still a knife and bloody hands are still bloody#huh. talking in the tags just helped me figure this out.#thanks for the help everyone
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So let's say you've been procrastinating on an assignment for a week, it was due a while ago, prof accepts late assignments but you've hit a total brick wall and have tried
the power of that last minute adrenaline rush (doesn't work anymore, there are worse things than failing a class)
setting a timer for 20 min increments (managed a total of 20 minutes on the project 💀)
Promising yourself rewards (not working because not watching anything is better than doing the assignment)
Taking breaks instead and coming back to it (just doesn't happen)
sheer willpower. Just do it (again, happened for 20 minutes)
writing each tiny specific step I need to accomplish (didn't make it more bearable)
going to different locations
guilt
annoyance
frustration
What is the next step. Like what else can I even try
#aside from getting medicated#i know what it is too. it's a class designed to make us better at marketing ourselves. i didn't know that going in#but the projects are like stuff we'd be having to do to advertise ourselves as a freelance writer or to get hired at a company#and i have a thing about carefully presenting the best sides of myself. i know you have to do it sometimes as a human being#but it plays into all the masking stuff that made my life hell for most of my 20s#it's like the second i recognized that's what i was doing & i wasn't just bad at being human my brain said no we're not doing that anymore#your options are be genuine or lie down in a stupor#good luck getting through the next phase of your life i've just nerfed you#anyway more info than y'all needed but i'm just not sure how to navigate things when i know the exact reason i'm blocked#but i've tried all the typical solutions and just wound up feeling worse
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when i was a kid i was really REALLY into fantasy books and comics but interestingly ive noticed as an adult im like. too picky about it? i still read and love a lot of fantasy fiction but while when i was a kid i loved it because of the fantasy worldbuilding but as an adult, 99% i like it Despite it all LOL like ive noticed i prefer most fantasy stories to not dwell too much on magic systems or whatever because i just dont care EXCEPT
except. recently i have discovered that actually i do really like fantasy, low or high, soft or hard, but you need one thing. you need your main character to really REALLY care about some hyperspecific aspect of your fantasy worldbuilding and make it the foundation of the story's scenarios:
either make them autistic and really into monsters or magic or whatever (a certain tasty dungeoning manga that i have been reading recently has taught me this) OR
make them a fucking business major and do real life financial stock market bullshit but like. in fantasy medieval times with wolf goddesses (spice and wolf <3)
#i read the first spice and wolf novel early this year it was so good. so so good. they tried to do a currency shorting scheme#the wolf woman was helping. she was helping our main character play the markets. she was in on it#actually in general i need more fantasy fiction to do dubious things with money and politics. i love white collar crime in my fantasy#and of course i like the dungeony manga because that blonde bitch wants to eat everything so bad. and hes a dog. in his heart#now THATS a fantasy protagonist i can get behind. either be a dog or be a business major. im being mean to lawrence sorry#but he is a business major. this is true. he stares at notebooks that say 'supply = demand' all day#i am so picky tho with fantasy worldbuilding is the thing. sometimes i like 99% of a world but then they throw in something i think is dumb#and im like. come on man. but its not their fault. because what i think is cool is not always cool. i want fantasy to either be about eatin#or unethical financial practices. so. um. OH and i would love to see some legal dramas in fantasy#im sure theyre out there. i should look for em. i wanna see fantasy copyright law so bad#none of my pickiness applies to games tho im a lot more forgiving. theres still a bunch of stuff i dont care about in a lot of games#worldbuilding. but because im playing it i can ignore it easier i guess LOL i dont know why im like this!!!#i swear i genuinely used to eat up any and all fantasy!!! i dont know why im so picky now!!!!!!!!!!!!
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So fucking tired of the gods damned temu ads being fucking everywhere. I’m so fucking sick of this bullshit system temu and shein have built themselves on of fucking, palatable exploitation where westerns are fine with it because “but it’s so cheap and it gets here so fast” at the fucking cost of people working for the equivalent of pennies an hour
#crow rambles#temu and shein both highlight a massive issue I have with current society#of everything having to happen NOW NOW NOW with no regard for the cost of it happening Now#no concern from the majority of the explotation#of the mass fast consumption use today throw out tomorrow mindset#no concern of the shoddy materials and construction going into these flimsy fast fashion type market items#‘well I know it’s bad technically but it’s really cheap and there’s no ethical consumption….’#shut up shut up shut up. that’s not what that fucking means#being really shit quality and really fast arrive Is Not a Good Thing. it means people are being explotated for your stupid little trinket
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i need to stop having problems before i completely lose it
#moth post#i need to stop imagining about what i wish i was or couldve been#god this year has been so fucking horrid so far. not as bad as last year i guess. but im just constnalty in the spiral of feeling like#im never good enough. im just wasted potential and that itll all ill ever be. i know im only 22 but i feel like ive failed already#i dont know my life direction. i dont know what to do after graduation. i dont know. im scared ill not be able to hold a job#im not a good enough artist to make a living off it im not good at marketing im not good at graphic design#im mid in everything. i already made a post with these exact fucking things but its just. still here. its always here. it never leaves
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