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its-snicket-here · 2 years

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The mom reader thing for overlord is pretty neat! This might be a weird thing to 'ask' but wouldn't it be cool if there was a doppelganger mom that chose to be a doppelganger because she knew that her son made pandora's actor and thought that it was cute if she was a doppelganger too? (Also it'd be funny if PA reminds her of Ainz when he was younger and still in That Phase) have a nice day/night!

Nothing is weird, once you seen it all. I'm going to collect all Overlord MILF/Moms and build a bootleg MCU, but Overlord edition, out of it. But thanks of enjoying my mom reader shenanigans, Peanut qwq

But behold! The power of the [Mom's Embarrassment Curse]! She will and physically will break that suppressed emotions out of Ainz. Nothing will stop her doing so, as well with the powers of Pandora's Actor! It does not help the fact that both doppelgänger mom and Pandora's Actor are the same race that the both would share embarrassing stories about Ainz. There is nothing Ainz's can do to stop them.

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Lowkey, I feel like she would do that to embarrass her son further during his phase and to at least feel human, but more on the latter, but it is a good another reminder why he left Pandora to the Treasury other than his jacked skill levels.

She'll even push it further by dressing up slightly like Pandora's Actor and doing all these dramatic poses he would do to. Extra points if she was taught these poses by Pandora himself. She will also would shift into Ainz and embarrass him more by reciting anything he did by heart to embarrass this skeleton mage further. Somebody come save this boy from his mother, please.

Though other than that, when alone with Pandora's Actor in the Treasury, she feels... sad. She would reminisce about that the past with Pandora, often times about Ainz's younger years. Often times, Pandora would tell his tales about Ainz when you weren't there and the two of you would reminisce together in silence. Pandora is the only physical reminder she have about Ainz. Every time she try to remember about Ainz's younger years, sometimes certain memories are fuzzy from old age. It became Pandora's self appointed job on keeping every single memories that she told him to bring up against once a while to cheer you up.

Honestly, she would only pick doppelgänger just because she holds on to the past of Ainz's younger years. She missed everything in the real world, such as working, cleaning, cooking, anything that she can do to become useful. Most of all, seeing Ainz's human face. Hearing him through that low signal phone calls, asking how his day was and such. Cooking him his favorites meals and dropping them off. Chiding and then cleaning his whole apartment for him and filling his fridge. With the skills of the doppelgänger, she would often self duplicate and reenact memories to still remember. A coping mechanism she has when she missed the real world and the past.

But those days are no longer there, as there were servants and Ainz being left with no time in his hands. Often would be occupied with the floor guardians or with the kingdoms. You didn't try stepping in, as you felt like you would intrude him with his work, so you did what you thought would be reasonable. Disguise yourself as a maid and just work, work, and work around Ainz to at least help him around a bit. Don't tell her that Ainz and literally everyone knows that she's the maid that is always around Ainz.

Ainz in turn feels guilty in this. He is negating his mother now in the new world and honestly.... he misses everything in the past too. Once a while he would send a voice scroll to doppelgänger mom to say hi and talk about his day, or go talk to her messaging when he has more self him time when alone and far away from the tomb. Rare times when he is able to be alone and not being off to work in spreading the words of Ainz Ooal Gown, he would physically visit her and just talk about anything that comes up to mind.

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Personally, this form of mom would be by far the weakest and more human like mom that has been created. Unlike Nymph, CDE, and Wyldy Elf Moms, she doesn't have any threat levels than can wipe out a whole army or have any followers. Her skill base would be more on the silver tongue and deception that would follow behind with heavy emotions as she doesn't have the heart to kill.

Her personality would be more on a down to earth and often lots of quietness with a side of sadness once a while. She wouldn't have a glade, but rather much a library where she could personally record memories so she wouldn't forget. Though the rules of the Glade follows with her, as nobody is allowed to go in without permission. Not servants or even Ainz himself.

Sorry this came out late, though I hope you have a good day/night as well!

#overlord #snicket speaks #overlord x reader #mom reader #ainz ooal gown #x reader #doppelganger #lord ainz #overlord headcanons #platonic

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poelya · 15 days

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Nyyym, I come bearing two questions.

1) as a fellow tea enthusiast, what's your favorite tea?

2) if I can ask, what's fictoromantic?

(I hope question two isn't invasive, I'm just curious)

Hiya Orb! Eee, questions, I do love those. I'm a big fan of black teas, so my favorites are english breakfast, irish breakfast, and the elusive lady grey. I honestly would love to explore more variety of teas, but I'm too afraid to get into the different herbs because of my allergies (that are seemingly random)....

As for the second question! It's not invasive, no! And despite the fact that I put it in my pinned, I'm going to be putting the explanation under the cut because I'm shy - I could just send this privately, but again. I did put it in my bio, so it'd probably be helpful to have a statement somewhere explaining!

So fictoromantic is a term I discovered last year! It's a microlabel that I believe is most commonly found in the aroace communities, and (of course) has some overlap with the self-shipping crowd as well - so y'know, it's a fairly niche thing that not a lot of people have heard of.

The basic gist is that it is someone who feels a significant (or solely feels) amount of romantic attraction towards fictional characters. Technically the term is fictosexual, so I think initially it is something people coined to have a term for the common (but not general) asexual experience of occasionally feeling attraction if the person in question is COMPLETELY unattainable - relevantly, like a fictional character.

But I don't really have the sex feelings (much) so when I found it, fictosexual didn't resonate with me. I thought it was fucking neat as hell, we need weirder queers, but then I kinda began realizing that...

Well. I do feel attraction to fictional characters. Romantic attraction. To the point that I was convinced for about two years my two queerplatonic partners who are married, were yanking my chain everytime I asked them what romantic love felt like because I was like. 'Well that can't be right! That's how I feel about x character' (oh I don't know why I'm redacting we all know who I'm talking about).

So, I kind of wound up coining my own term for myself. fictoromantic. I kept it close to my chest for a long time (only my partners knew about it), not because I was embarrassed but - I know how weird, and especially aspec, queers are treated. I didn't wanna get made fun of.

But! Aromantic as a term just doesn't resonate with me. Trying to identify with it honestly just doesn't feel right to me, and makes me miserable. So I started using fictoromantic a little more openly, because that does feel more Correct for me.

tl;dr it's a microlabel where you feel significant genuine romantic attraction (like one would for a real person) towards a fictional character. more commonly known by its counterpart, fictosexual.

#asks #userorb #catch me posting this and then diving into the ether

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zeeph-containment-zone · 6 months

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I could go on FOR HOURS about all of the things I love dearly about the SMRPG remake but I'm gonna be different,,, I'm gonna talk about the things that I didn't like/were weird to me instead >:) (even then they aren't even really game changing things they're just me being nitpicky lol, none of these change my judgement on the remake being absolutely wonderful either!!!) There'll be spoilers under the break so tread with caution if you haven't beaten the main storyline yet!!!

Difficulty:

or rather, lack thereof. I know the game isn't too hard to begin with, but I did feel like it was a little too easy on the normal mode. I think inclusion of the breezy mode was fine because people who want to play on it can play on it and I don't have to, but I do think the main difficulty should have been a bit less forgiving with the timed hit windows and the gauge boosts. The limit breaks didn't bother me all that much, simply because I never used them and was never forced to except for when the mechanic was introduced. In fact, I'm gonna be totally honest, I've never even SEEN the other limit breaks/triple moves aside from the Mario/Mallow/Geno one because I didn't really want to use them and didn't ever really feel like I had to. I think it's fine that they're there and it was a really really neat inclusion, but I also like how you aren't roped into using them and have the option to just, not. However, something you don't have the option to not use is the splash damage and gauge boosts. I found I hit the 10 combo mark pretty quickly pretty often and the stat buff was nice but it did make the game a little too steamrolly at times. The splash damage from perfect timed hits was also kind of annoying and steamrolly, especially when trying to collect Thought Peaks. (I DO really like the perfect block timed hit mechanic though!!!!!) I know the postgame boss rematches are harder and gimmicky and I'm very excited to play those when I have the chance to like, sit down and play vidya games again (ESPECIALLY CULEX'S)! But I do wish they had opted for a hard mode that got rid of the splash damage and either removed/lessened the gauge stat buffs. And also dare I say, make the timed hit window smaller and get rid of the party swapping mechanic for it as well. I did really like the mid-battle party swap because I got to utilize characters I never really got to in the SNES version (namely Peach and Mallow, I'd always run Mario/Geno/Bowser. But then again playing Mallow as someone who knows how to correctly use a mage now was much easier than back when this was the only jrpg I'd ever played.) But I think It'd make for a more challenging and authentic-to-original experience.

Not being able to swap out Mario:

See, I understand why this is in there. Because he is The Guy™ and also so you don't get locked in battles where you have to jump on an enemy to win, like the dry bones. But I think it would have been a really nice QOL change to let you switch mario out for someone else, at least once you hit the postgame. I'd really like to experiment with different team comps that don't have mario in them, my preferred team I'd like to try being Mallow/Geno/Bowser.

The Cutscene Font:

idk it just really clashed with what was going on behind it. I can't pinpoint what it was exactly that was bothering me about it, it just kinda felt awkward

Localization Changes:

I'm going to start this by saying I'm actually VERY happy with the direction they took, by making appropriate changes but keeping the Woolsey translations that made the game as charming as it was. I was so happy to see Culex's goofy antimatter speech before his fight that made me so so happy!!!!

There were some things that got removed that were a little weird to me though:

☆ The toad in the Mushroom Kingdom that asks Mario to "Get Hitched in a few years"

I can see why this was changed, but I always read it as a "celebrity crush" type thing. We all had them, it's a pretty normal thing. I'm just happy I could still stand on top of him and make Mario dizzy

☆Gambling removed from Grate Guy's Casino

It's weird because they kept Casino in the name, but removed the actual gambling. Blackjack has been completely removed and the slots are still there, just named something different and you don't have to spend coins to play anymore. Blackjack did get replaced with a cute memory match minigame though! Gambling has been getting phased out of games for a while now and it's just one of those "huh, that's weird" things to me.

☆Peace Signs removed

Don't get me wrong, I like the new victory animations a whole lot! But I do think it was a strange choice to phase out the peace signs from Mario's, Mallow's, and Peach's victory pose. Was there a reason for it?

☆Card Symbols removed

Not sure why these were taken out either, I always thought it was a really cool detail how each character had their own playing card symbol and color attached to them when they used a magic attack. Maybe they did away with it because of the gambling association?

☆Heavy Troopa, Big Bertha, Speardovich, and Claymorton

I kind of get why Heavy Troopa and Big Bertha (one of the bullet bill cannon enemy's) names got changed because of the connotations, but the original names are pretty harmless given the fact, specifically in the case of Heavy Troopa, there's still dialogue that references his size. Speardovich, iirc, was a localization change but Yaridovich just rolls off the tongue so much nicer and I feel like even with the name change people are just gonna call him Yari anyway. Mack's name being changed to Claymorton is probably the one that makes the least amount of sense to me, but it could be because a lot of the pop culture references were phased out (like the Bruce Lee line and Punchinello's James Bond introduction.) Mack's name was probably a reference to Bobby Darin's "Mack the Knife." That or it had something to do with an SNES character limit.

The other name changes didn't really bother me that much and I feel like they fit pretty well (except for Neosquid because of the haha funny it really doesn't bother me at all shhhhhhh)

☆The Royal Bus Logo

The ONLY reason I'm listing this on here is because despite having been removed from the 3D model, it's still present in the Credits sequence. Was probably an oversight, but I thought it was funny. It was probably removed since players outside of Japan wouldn't get what it was referencing (which is quite literally Jugemu Basu, which translates to 'Lakitu Bus' as it was referred to that in the JP version of the game.)

☆Geno's curls are part of his hat

Okay this isn't an actual issue I had with the game I just always drew him with ribbons for hair. I'm probably still drawing him with ribbons for hair lmao

☆Grate Guy Reward RNG

This also isn't an issue I had with the game but it is just me bitching how I didn't get a single red essence from Grate Guy while getting the star egg. I'm just super unlucky I think, can't find anything about his item pool being changed.

Framerate Issues:

So this is actually INCREDIBLY minor. I noticed the game chugs a little bit when you're in the water/by the water. Not sure why that is exactly but there's certainly a bit of a slowdown. Not a super duper obvious game breaking one, but subtle enough to be noticed.

And that's really all I got. Again reiterating before someone grabs their pitchfork and tries to skewer me that this doesn't change my judgement on the game at all and I still truly believe this is a near 10/10 remake that did an incredible job respecting it's source material while also adding fresh new content and QOL changes. I have a HUGE list of positive things to say about the game that heavily outweigh the nitpicks!!!!! Looking forward to running around in the post game, ESPECIALLY the final Culex fight!

#super mario rpg #mario rpg #critique #nintendo #no really i say these things but the game is still unnironically super good #please don't take this as me saying the game is bad pls pls pls

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nulltune · 1 year

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five interesting facts about Hakuno & five things you consider uncanny. Go!

THANK YOU SUE FOR MY LIFE!!!! talking abt hakuno is my hobby fr so thank u 4 enabling me ehe <3 here we go!!

5 interesting facts about hakuno:

her name is an annagram of kimi no na hakushi which translates to "your name is blank". i think it's suuper neat because 1. it gives you the impression of it being an insert name here kind of thing that's common for self-inserts, but it's a nice way to start off hakuno's character journey of becoming her own character from a blank slate and 2. it's a pretty straightforward way of telling us that her name, much like herself, is blank. empty. there's nothing there ^_T

speaking of- you know how with mc characters, there's usually a silly haha kind of dialogue option? that's present for hakuno too but i like it because it's more like an illusion of choice than something more like a self-insert thing. the point hakuno makes in the end is essentially the same, she's just being a lil goofy about the delivery, y'know! i'm not even kididng btw sgfkshfj hakuno herself admits sometimes that she did do it to get a rise/see the other person's reaction to it. moon lady's got a lil michievous side ✨️

she knows the sa-shi-su-se-so which is an expression to memorize essential ingredients for japanese cuisine. so it's safe to say that she'd at least know the basics of cooking, though it's a lil headcanon of mine that although she knows it theoretically, she absolutely flops at the execution (and if you wanna make this more nuanced, you can think of this through the lens of food as a love language-)

she "doesn't particularly like octopus". we don't get a reason why, but it's kinda funny when considering the sea motif in fate/extra! maybe hakuno wouldn't like seafood in general? this isn't that interesting but agfkshf we barely get any information about hakuno herself ya kno!!! which makes sense considering she doesn't even know herself, but that's why i treasure these little crumbs !!

i've noticed this in my reread of fate/extra, but i feel like hakuno brings up the fact that she's "not alone" Quite A Lot post chapter 4 or so. it's her only solace after finding out the truth of her existence so it makes sense why that fact is important to her, but i also like to think that repeating it so much is her (likely unconscious) way of trying to cope with how truly lonely her existence is :,)

5 things i consider uncanny:

OH MAN THIS IS A PERFECT THING TO ASK BC there's always hints about something being "off" about hakuno. in hindsight, it's pretty sad when this disconnect with everyone and everything else seems almost inherent to her existence when all she wants is to be a normal human and find her place in the world </3 and spoiler alert: She Is Not and She Does Not. but it's neat!

there's this one hakuno dialogue response that was essentially her introducing herself in an almost automatic "pavlovian response" — it's a small hint about her true nature as an artificial intelligence but i wish we got more of this aspect explored tbh! how much of her is real? how much of her is her? it could really mess up hakuno's head but it'd be hella interesting to see !

her reaction to being felt up by someone as a first meeting was seriously underwhelming ! a lot of hakuno's reactions to things are pretty tame and iirc it's been noted that she's strangely calm for someone in such a high-stress situation (enough to cripple even the finest soldiers, according to rin). it's likely her being so numb to it all tbh ^_T but it's still pretty weird hakunochan!!!

this one's kinda graphic but there's a scene where hakuno tries to reach her servant-- even as her body is literally being broken down and deleted in the process :,) i say it's uncanny because damn it's a great scene but hakuno's thought process behind it all is a widdle fucked up!! look at what she has to say when she goes numb from the pain + her stomach collapsed: "I just feel gross, like I’ve turned into a skeleton-monster. Though with my body being lighter, I’ll be able to walk faster, which is nice." HELLO??!? (bassbooted)

this one comes a ccc anthology chapter but basically hakuno was asked to pose for a photoshoot and she has no problems wearing a suggestive nightgown, a bikini, and a wedding dress but Draws The Line at a maid outfit (girl?) (she ended up wearing it — and absolutely slaying the look, if i do say so myself — but was Very embarrassed)

#femtaile #&&. out of #THIS WAS RLLY FUN TO LIST DOWN WAAAH TYSM FOR THE ASK SUE !!! 🥺🫶💖💕#i love h.akuno in all her peculiar and uncanny ways okok VDKSCHSJCJ SHE IS SO INTERESTING 2 MEEEEE #ngl canon disappoints me sometimes bc they they purposely leave stuff abt h.akuno Vague to maintain that ~~self-insert feel~~#even tho it goes against the entire point of her character and development.!!!!!!#so i feel like sometimes she's in a weird position of character & self-insert solely because they want to appeal to both ppl who like #an mc with their own personality; but also ppl who want to just project what they want onto an mc #it's sad because she becomes more self-insert than her own character in later games (looking at you e.xtella-) 🥹#AND IM SO UPSET OVER IT TBH 😭😭 H.AKUNO DESERVES BETTER SMH #BUT YEA- i like to repurpose that to make it more in line with h.akuno's character #a nameless being that wants meaning; bonds & connections because she wants to have some sort of humanity/life to herself #I JUST HAVE A LOT OF THOUGHTS ABT THIS GIRL AAAAA 🥹🥹 but yeah she makes me facking die !!!#i wuv her......... A whole lot.......

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casspurrjoybell-26 · 1 month

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Too Old For This - Chapter 12 - Part 1

*Warning Adult Content*

"I'm just going to be gone for the afternoon. It's not a big deal," Leroy said as he made a turn.

He was speaking to his sister on his cell-phone that was propped up on a phone holder by the steering wheel.

It was a Sunday and Leroy was on his way to pick Zachary up to do some grocery shopping.

At first, he'd just been leaving the house as usual and then his sister had started a racket when she noticed that Zachary was taking their mum's car.

She wanted to know if he was off for a date and trying to impress a girl or something but the young man had simply shrugged her off, telling her he was going to get groceries before asking her what she wanted.

She didn't believe him, of course and decided to call him on the phone to continue her inquisition about his whereabouts.

"Don't kill somebody," his sister said from the other end and Leroy sighed, rolling his eyes as he made a turn.

"I'm not the best driver but I'm not the worst. You've bumped into more things than me."

"That's because you quit after your first accident."

"I wouldn't call that an accident if we don't call your curb abuse accidents," Leroy shot back, changing the gear as he came up to the house Zachary lived in.

He could feel his heart begin to slow down, as nerves twisted together in the pit of his stomach.

He hadn't seen Zachary in a while and even though they talked every day, it was just different interacting with him in person.

He was less dry, more animated and his humor was the type that involved facial expressions that Leroy couldn't make out through text and he missed that, even though it'd only been a week.

'Calm down,' he told himself, as he came to a halt on the driveway.

"I'll talk to you later," he told his sister, who had been silent on the other line before hanging up.

He then scrolled through his contact list, then pressed the call button for Zachary and waited.

The phone rang for a while, denting the car's otherwise pin-drop silence.

When Zachary picked up the call, he muttered a raspy...

"Hello?"

"Hi. It's Leroy. I'm outside," the younger man said, staring at the phone as his heart beat a little faster.

The last time Leroy had been to this house... had seen Zachary in person... was when he had slept over after they'd watched a movie.

It was the worst sleep he'd had and it wasn't because Zachary's bed was uncomfortable or that Zachary had made things weird.

It was just him being paranoid and fighting with his own thoughts, as the older man had slept like a baby next to him.

Leroy had spent most of that night just observing Zachary, staring at his features and noticing how his slightly parted lips let out the cutest snore he'd ever heard.

He'd also been fighting the urge to hug him, kiss him... fuck, he'd been battling a whole boner even though that's not something he'd fully admitted to himself yet.

"Oh, okay, give me a few minutes. I'll be getting out soon," the older man said, hanging up.

Leroy blinked at his screen, turning away from it to look out of his window.

He stared at the house's porch, expecting Zachary to step out at any minute.

It took a while but eventually, the front door creaked open and Zachary came out in his wheelchair.

He closed the door behind him before reaching down to run his fingers through the fur of one of his many cats before looking up.

He spotted Leroy waiting in the car and then smiled at him before giving the man a wave.

Leroy blinked, looking away for a bit before turning and waving back to Zachary.

The man looked a bit different... maybe because he wasn't in his signature pajamas or loose clothes.

His hair was also different.

The once curly trove of hair that bounced everywhere or that was restrained by hair bands, was now laying down in tight neat twists.

Leroy thought they suited him.

You could actually see his face now.

Zachary had a good-looking jawline and cheekbones to die for.

Things that were usually hidden by his hair.

Leroy watched the older man stroll down the wheelchair ramp before making his way, very slowly, through the lawn.

He reached the other side of the car before knocking on the door. Leroy reached over to open it and there was Zachary, staring at him from his wheelchair.

"Hi," Zachary said, smiling at Leroy before looking around.

"Okay, seems like there'll be enough space."

Leroy raised a brow.

"For what?"

Zachary bit on his bottom lip, sighing as he looked at the back of the car.

"I'm going to need your help. Like, I can sit in the passenger seat but we need to fold up the wheelchair and put it in the back seat. I mean I would prefer the trunk if it's big enough or if you don't need groceries there..." the older man trailed, as he twirled one of the strands of newly twisted hair.

"The trunk is big enough," Leroy said.

"There's a spare tire in there but I can move it."

Zachary sighed at this.

"If it's a lot of work, you don't have to."

Leroy shrugged.

"It'll only take a few minutes."

With that, the younger man put off the car engine and got out of the car.

He walked over to the back, pulling the truck door open before pulling out the spare tire.

Zachary watched the younger man pull it to the side before opening the back door and hurling it in.

"You can get in the car. I'm sure I can figure out how to fold a chair," Leroy said, shutting the back door before looking over at Zachary.

Zachary looked from Leroy to the door of the passenger seat before getting up and getting into the car.

Leroy walked over to him and looked about the chair before figuring out how to fold it.

"Be careful..." Zachary trailed, watching the man lift it.

Leroy nodded.

"I'm not going to drop it, don't worry," he said before walking out of sight.

Zachary listened to the rustling at the back and then the slam of the trunk door.

The younger man was soon in the car with him, shutting his door and starting the engine.

"It was a good fit, I think it should be good," Leroy said, turning on the air conditioning before adjusting the driver's mirror.

Zachary nodded, turning over to look at the man.

He noticed that he'd seen Leroy in both formal work attire and super casual wear but never something in between like he was in now.

His dress shirt had a few buttons open, and his jeans looked more like slacks than jeans.

"You look good," Zachary blurted before he could think about the potential consequences of his words.

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bloodgoddarlin · 3 years

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Okay so this is just shamelessly my oc, I'm not even going to try to make it just gen reader bc I don't think I can

So Thysia (he/they) (I'll dm you the picrews I made of him btw)

His "human name" is Eli

He's not a God, not the way Protesilaus is or the other gods are

He's essentially the primordial spirit of sacrifice. (Not just the traditional kind but all kinds, from the most mundane to the self destructive kind. (I based him off of immolation, but that's not the only thing he's a part of))

He doesn't have the same direct control other gods have, he can only inspire or uninspire a population to have sacrificial tendencies (and if they do too much it'll push them become martyrs) but he doesn't need worshipers to keep him healthy. He just is. (Sacrifices and people with a sacrificial spirit make him better but by himself he just vibes)

However the pantheon he was with wouldn't listen. They would expect things he couldn't do and not appreciate him doing what he did (also quite a few refused to stop referring to him as a woman when he asked)

So eventually he got tired of it and left.

Fucked around as a human for a few centuries, in which the world kind of forgot him. (The older pantheon, who thought he was like them despite him telling them otherwise, assumed he was dead because of this)

One day he stumbles across the disciples of the blood god (and if they're anywhere as devoted as the anons, the amount of sacrificial energy there would really empower him)

He thought it'd be neat to see what kind of deity has such a fervent influence.

He's confident for one of the first times in. Ever

And I imagine him trying to challenge Protesilaus, maybe in a small way, not following an order the right way, or being a smart ass

(In his mind, he's kinda freaking out like "I'm doing this?? Holy shit what am I getting into" but he's high on confidence)

He at some point is in a physical altercation I imagine, and he, not being human, obviously is ludicrously strong in comparison to the human he appears to be.

How this transitions a romantic relationship I don't actually know but uhh it does, let's say.

Thysia makes it clear that there is more to him than he lets on, but that he doesn't want to talk about it. They aren't trying to lie and be like "I'm normal and nothing is weird", especially since they're in a legit relationship.

One day, in an attempt to idk do some business thing, the pantheon Thysia used to work with show up while they and Protesilaus are together.

This causes problems. The pantheon don't recognize him, they don't know him how he is and assume him to be dead. But he remembers them. God he remembers them. If he's feeling okay he'll just be uncomfortable and stiff. But if he's already off? Panic attack time baby! He'd try to put it aside as to not interrupt but he realizes that it's time to finally tell about his past. He initially wouldn't want to confront the pantheon but he could be persuaded because the support of the blood god himself telling them that they're great and a man could make anyone strong enough to fight a God.

This might be a little weird and I'm sorry if it's annoying or wildly mischaracterized (I tried to avoid Protesilaus having any real dialogue to avoid mischaracterizing him but I'm still nervous about it)

🌌anon

Oh my sweet Jesus I am SO SORRY for not answering this sooner!! Life has been Busy recently between my job & my birthday coming up in a few days plus also mental health being Not Great so I'm sorry :(

But this. I love this. Yes. Blood God is the type of man who would fight and kill for his partners, 110%.

Just imagine, Thysia is just vibing with his hot bf and the pantheon rolls up like "ayup" and he's all just like "shit. fuck. god dammit."

#snail answers #long post #blood god tag

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superangsty · 3 years

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ok ficlet prompt: tomgreg coffeeshop au but Tom is the barista and he's a total bitch about it. up to you whether this is a) an au where they don't know each other at all or b) post season 2 au where tom is on the outs. basically i just think it'd be funny to see tom forced into doing menial labor and taking it out on customer!greg by belittling his order. if you hate this, you never saw it lol

fsdgfgfdhs I feel like I didn’t get much snarkiness in there and I’m not sure if 1k+ words can still be called a ficlet, but here we go!

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Tom doesn’t normally pay attention to customers. Sure, some of them you get used to when you’re seeing their miserable faces day in, day out, and for an even smaller percentage you remember their orders and sometimes, if you’re feeling particularly generous (or bored, either works), you let the ones who look like they’re about to cry skip the queue, but for the most part the hundreds of faces he sees each day blend together.

Hard, though, for a face to blend in with the others when it’s a foot above everyone else in the store.

It’s eleven in the morning and the rush is on, but every time Tom looks up from the till or coffee machine his eyes automatically dart to where this guy is standing in the queue, just briefly before he gets back to what he was doing.

When the guy gets to the front of the line, he smiles and says “hey, how are you?”, and for the first time in his years in this job Tom smiles back.

Then he goes and ruins it all by ordering a skim milk vanilla mocha latte with, and this is a direct quote “some kinda sprinkle things?”. Asshole.

He comes back the next day, in mid-afternoon when it’s quieter and Tom’s the only one behind the bar (and thank god for that, because after he’d left yesterday Tom had got honest to god wolf-whistles from the others).

“Hi,” he greets, still with that carefree smile. He tucks a piece of hair behind his ear. “How’re ya doing?”

“I’m great,” lies Tom. “What’ll it be?”

“Um, an iced almond-milk macchiato with, like, do you have some caramel? Like a lot of caramel?”

This guy had better not become a fucking regular.

He becomes a regular. Every day for a week, and never at the same time, he comes in and orders a new, somehow even more ridiculous drink than the one before. It’s infuriating.

Still, Tom can’t help but notice things about him. His hair needs a cut, he’s carrying a backpack that needs to be thrown out, like, ten years ago, and his suits are cheap but if Tom knows his shoes – and he does know his shoes – he’s wearing a pair of Crockett & Jones oxfords.

A line has to be drawn somewhere. Luckily, the guy draws the line himself when he comes in one day, 10pm, and asks for a cappuccino with four shots of espresso.

“Absolutely not.”

“What, why?”

Tom cocks his head, frowning. “Because you would have a heart attack, that’s why, and I don’t feel like dealing with a lawsuit.”

“No, it’s fine, I’ve had it before, actually, so.”

“Then get it somewhere else.” Tom waves a hand towards the door when the guy doesn’t move, just stands there with his eyes wide like a deer caught in the headlights. “Shoo!”

He comes back the next day, orders himself a herbal tea, and introduces himself as Greg. Weird and unnecessary, as far as apologies go, but whatever.

Greg starts ordering normal drinks. Tom keeps on making ridiculous sugary crimes against humanity for him, and then telling him he’ll get diabetes when he accepts them. This is not flirting.

Greg starts staying to sit and drink in the café, rather than rush out. Sometimes he reads the newspaper, sometimes he flicks through paperwork. Sometimes Tom gives him one of the day-old cookies that are normally claimed by staff. This is still not flirting.

One day, there’s snow and no customers, and Greg says “hey, Tom, why don’t you sit with me for a bit?”, and Tom does.

They sit in silence for a couple of minutes, each sipping at their respective drinks, and then Greg asks “so you been working here long?”

“Couple of years,” Tom replies. “Came into some money, saw the storefront for sale, thought ‘why the fuck not’, right?”

He’s gotten very good at keeping this part vague. The money had come wrapped in the neat little bow of ‘redundancy package’, when in reality it was hush money in response to the breakup and the breakdown and the subsequent NDAs.

It’s not what Tom thought his life would be. It kinda sucks, actually, but whatever.

“Oh!” Greg says, again with those wide eyes of his. “I – I didn’t know you owned it, um, sorry? If I offended you?”

Tom waves it off. “New to the city?”

“Ha, yeah,” Greg says, smiling into his cup. “How could you tell?”

Everything about you, Tom wants to say. “You’ve just got a vibe,” he says instead.

A customer walks in, and the conversation is cut short.

This keeps happening. It’s like Greg knows when Tom won’t be busy, and he chooses those exact times to show up. It’s annoying, really. He’s annoying. And Tom isn’t flirting.

A couple of months later Greg walks in during the mid-morning rush with another, significantly shorter (not that it’s hard), man in tow.

Tom takes one look at him, unties his apron, and walks into the back room.

Kendall fucking Roy.

Of all the coffee shops in all of Manhattan, he had to come into Tom’s. Of all the customers in all the coffee shops in all of Manhattan, Tom had to befriend the one guy who just happened to know his ex-future-brother-in-law.

He stays back there until he hears Greg’s voice disappear out the door again.

“I brought my cousin by here yesterday, told him it was the best coffee in the city.”

The next day, Greg is back at his normal time and is sitting in his normal seat. Tom is reluctantly sitting across from him.

Cousins, jesus fucking christ, it keeps getting worse.

Also, Tom’s coffee is only okay. Greg should probably try some new cafes.

“And what did he think?”

Greg shrugs. “I don’t know, he said it was only okay. He also saw you walk into the back? Said ‘hey I know that guy’?”

“I used to work at Waystar Royco.”

Greg smiles incredulously. “No way! That’s where I work too!”

“Mm, nothing like a good bit of nepotism in the workplace, is there?” Tom bites out. But it’s not like he’s bitter, or anything. That would be hypocritical.

“Oh, ha, I guess.” Greg shifts awkwardly in his seat, like he’s worried Tom will think less of him. “So you used to work together?”

“Used to be engaged to his sister, too.”

Greg doesn’t drop his cup, but it’s a near thing. He gapes at Tom. “You’re Tom Tom?”

Whatever the fuck that’s supposed to mean. He wonders what they’ve been saying about him, whether Greg’s important enough to know the real story or if he got the version they feed their friends and colleagues.

Not that it matters, because there’s no way Greg’s coming back after this. There’s no way Tom would want him to come back.

“I think you’re done, Greg. I’ll clear up your cup.”

Greg looks like he’s going to say something, but Tom walks away and doesn’t look at him until he leaves.

Against all odds, he comes back the next day. And the next.

#Anonymous #tomgreg #ficlet #my child is fine your child just wrote a 1.25k tomgreg coffeeshop au in the space of like 20 minutes

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killian-whump · 4 years

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So who in the Coven of Colin or Coven of Hooks (Are they separate covens or the same one?) would be most likely to bang intelligent lifeforms of outer space? Not counting Gordo, cause that answer's obvious so it'd be cheating.

Well, the Coven of Hooks is a subsection of the Colin Character Coven. Like, when the Colin Character Coven gathers for meetings, only one Hook is allowed to attend. Otherwise, things get way too piratey and sexy and murdery for everyone else. Also, it’s a well-known fact that Kraken-san can’t resist congregations of two or more Killian Joneses in one place, so it’s important to keep the Hooks down to one (1) for the anal integrity of all those involved. Also, due to the relative importance and prevalence of the Hooks, as a group, they tend to also moderate most of the meetings, for better or worse.

And for those wondering, the standard present-day Killian Jones from Storybrooke is usually the Hook that gets sent to the Colin Character Coven meetings - though they do occasionally send other Hooks instead, particularly if its a themed meeting or the topic of discussion is something one Hook feels a little more strongly about than the others.

Case in point - this discussion right here. For some reason, it appears that Old Hook has decided to attend this meeting on behalf of the Coven of Hooks. Let’s take a peek in at the meeting. I believe they’re taking the final poll now...

Rowe: No. Brendan: I’m not weird, but yes. Peter Sheerin: Eh, why not? Jamie: No, but can I write a story about one of you doing it? Conor Elliott: Erm... No? (he’s on his meds this week) Security Guard: It’s tough, it’s tough. Duke Philip: I shan’t be partaking, gentlemen. Ben: No. No. Michael Kovak: Is that like a demon? Mark: YES. Michael Kovak: Then no. Been there, done that, didn’t enjoy it.

Crickets: *chirping quietly for several moments*

Old Hook: At any rate, I would. In fact, I mis-read the invitation. I thought we were gathering here to do exactly that, and while I appreciate the free donuts, I have to say I’m pretty disappointed, lads. Mark: You skipped me. Old Hook: No we didn’t. You said, and I quote, “YES” - in all caps, even. Mark: I was answering that Michael nerd’s question! Old Hook: Ah. Right. Well... Mark: My answer is NO. In all caps. Hell no! Aliens exist, and they’re absolutely terrible, murderous, disgusting beasts with gaping, toothy maws and one fucking ATE MY FACE OFF. Old Hook: Right. But you see, I’m using pen here... Mark: What’s that got to do with anything?? Old Hook: Well, I’d have to scribble out your YES, you see, and it would just make everything look much less neat. Michael Kovak: Neatness is next to Godliness. Mark: Nobody asked you! Jamie: Can we stay on topic here? I’ve had a lot of coffee today, and I just feel like there isn’t really a story here, after all. Old Hook: *coughs* So Mark stays with the YES and- Mark: No he doesn’t!!! You change that right now! Old Hook: But it’s pen... Mark: Listen, old man... Unnamed Lumberjack: *stands up* *opens his mouth to say something* *decides not to* *shakes his head and sits down*

Crickets: *still chirping softly in the ensuing silence*

Old Hook: Next is... Brennan Sullivan? Has anyone seen Brennan? Rowe: He’s out back, puking. Everyone, including the Crickets: *siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh* Michael Kovak: It’s that Nora again, isn’t it. Old Hook: Well, unless she’s an alien- Mark: She’s not. I keep telling you people, aliens are real and I know exactly what they look like, because one fucking ate my goddamn face right off and- Old Hook: I’ll put Brennan down for “no” then. Mark: Oh, sure! You’ll put that loser down for a no, but you thought I’d say yes to fucking one of those things?! Conor Elliott: Ah... You do recall trying to sleep with each and every one of our girlfriends at one point or another, right? Peter Sheerin: The git even tried to bang me sister. Mark: Yeah, but I wouldn’t- Old Hook: Well... according to this official coven document, you would. In all caps, even. It’s written in pen.

Crickets: *chirp out little tiny cricket laughs at Mark’s expense*

Old Hook: Lets carry on, shall we? Where were we... Professor Harrison: Well, I wouldn’t have sex with an alien. I doubt they’d know anything about how to please a man like me in bed. Hisirdoux Casparan: I don’t really think it’s fair to judge an alien species and decide whether or not I would find them attractive or worth pursuing romantically without having met one of them and gotten to know them properly... Mark: You’re a 900-year-old virgin. Hisirdoux Casparan: *gasp* You take that back! Mark: You don’t even deny it. Hisirdoux Casparan: I am on a children’s show! Mark: Exactly. 900-year-old virgin. Hisirdoux Casparan: *frowns* *starts chanting quietly*

Crickets: *chirp nervously*

Elder Peter: God frowns on sex with alien creatures. In the scriptures... Michael Kovak: Here we go. Elder Peter: In the scriptures... it says- Michael Kovak: They’re not scriptures if you just wrote them on a napkin twenty minutes ago in the bathroom. Elder Peter: I am God’s mouthpiece. My word is gospel. Michael Kovak: You’re a loony, is what you are. Old Hook: What do I put him down for, then? Mark: I don’t know. If it’s a fully grown female, he’ll probably try to marry it in a lake and hump it, so put him down for a yes. Old Hook: Done. J.J., do you have a response? J.J. Sneed: OW, goddammit. Old Hook: Try to stay on topic, mate. We’re discussing fornication with intelligent alien beings this week. J.J. Sneed: I ain’t got any goddamn knees, you bastard! Every week, y’all ask me some dumb question and I tell you I am in dire need of medical care, and every damn week, you assholes ignore me! Old Hook: Come now, mate. It’s all in good fun. Just give us an answer, so we can put you down in the official poll tally. J.J. Sneed: NO, then. No, I would not fuck a fucking alien. Now can someone please get me to a doctor? I’m bleeding out here! Conor Elliott: I tried to drive you to the clinic just last week. You stole my wallet and drove off in my car, laughing out the window about what a pansy ass I am. J.J. Sneed: Now you listen here... Old Hook: Well, that’s everybody then! Meeting’s adjourned. Michael Kovak: We didn’t ask Gordo. Old Hook: Yes, well, the Ask specifically said, “not counting Gordo” so I think it’s acceptable that we leave him out of it this time around. Besides, he’s not here right now. Ben: Uh... where is he? Old Hook: It seems he’s on a “date” with a space kraken of some kind. He sent along his apologies on a card emblazoned with the word “YOLO” on it.

Absolutely No One: *is surprised*

Hisirdoux Casparan: *stands abruptly, knocking over his chair* Appearium Facade Masticating Extra-Terrestrionus! Alien from Storage 24: *appears as if summoned by a master wizard* Mark: *screams and runs away, chased by the alien* Hisirdoux Casparan: See if he calls me a 900-year-old virgin again...

#colin character coven #kw fanfic #sorta #whatever it is it's #oc #and #my attempts at humor #anonymous #kw ask box

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