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ackerpreach · 3 years

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This ending .... I can name 500 reasons and I will name them right now, because I don’t think I’m the only one who is upset with how things turned out. (Also, A positive message for all of you at the end)

MAJOR LEAKS SPOILERS/ READ WITH CAUTION

Update: after reading more theories from fellow RM bloggers, and sleeping over it one day, this entire chapter might be an april fools... Don't fully lose hope yet beautiful people. It's me just giving a review on a possible fake April fools chapter

After following this franchise since 2013, so nearly a DECADE. this ending is a pure disserve to the entire fandom. I feel like Yams has rushed it just for the sake of being done with the entire manga. So many things are left open, characters and their developemt are reverted back all the way to chapter 1 or are left even worse than that...

Mikasa’s worthless character development/ Aaronmika’s horrible toxic codependent relationship

Oh honey... Let’s start with how horrible Isayama has treated her. We were all rooting for her, because we all felt like she was so misunderstood. She had a horrible childhood and imprinted on a guy who treated her like trash 99 percent of the story. And then, slowly but surely, she starts to realize she has to stop obsessing over him in the uprising arc with the help of a real man who treats her like a queen, more importantly, he treats her like a real human being. This man sees her for her abilities and that she has the power to be self dependent. She learned parts of herself, that she was able to work together with him like no one else could. She learned parts of herself she was unable to do so if she kept obsessing about Aaron. All this love, care, mutual understanding and RESPECT these two shared.

but...NAH FUCK THAT, right Yams?? Throw all this development away, all this bonding. Let’s make the main female lead even more yandere than she already was in the first season. Let her make out with his decapacitated head (like dude, this is also pure disrespect to Aaron’s dead body btw) and let her obsess even more about the guy who has treated her no better than a piece of toilet cloth 99 percent of the time. The guy who was never really appreciative in front of her for saving his ass billions of times, who always pushed her away, who yells at her and snaps at her whenever he can instead of reasoning and talking calmly with her in mature way. (EVEN PARODY YOUTUBE CHANNELS WHO DONT SHIP ANYTHING MAKE IT A TROPE WHERE AARON TELLS MIKASA HE HATES HER GUTS WHENEVER HE CAN)

Then after all that, suddenly Yams tries to last minute persuade us Aaron’s always been head over heels for her??? He should have build their relationship better which he hasn’t even tried to do so... He must be thinking his fans are stupid for eating this from his hands.

Like seriously??? What is this???

Isayama is just fully contradicting himself. It’s like someone tipped him off with a buttload of money for him to write Aaron like this to satisfy shipping needs and to cash in those extra money’s from it. Even if he tried to cater to Erem*ika, this is not how you write a loving and caring couple which people will root for.

This next two panels just freaking infuriates me to the core of my soul. I can’t even describe how dissapointed I am with Mikasa.

Why is she clutching that head so obsessively like that? Why is she walking and turning her back away from her comrades? After everything they have done for her, after all they’ve been through?! After everything Armin has done? Standing up for Mikasa, beating up Aaron for hurting her. I feel like even Jean, Connie and Sasha have cared more for her in a healthy way. Sure, Aaron cares for her romantically too apparently (What a twist Yams :)), but has he aided her to becoming a mentally healthier individual? Has he aided in her mental stability? The answer is a big fat NO! All I see between these two after today’s raw Chapter’s are too Yandere obsessed individuals who have no clue on how to maintain a healthy relationship.

Love should only go as far as the heart can endure and it seems like her character is not willing to be aware of that. Even Armin was able to let go of Aaron in those latest panels. Why does her entire character resolve around this guy??? I really do not understand. Her Ackerbond and her age is not an excuse for her to throw her life away like this.

Shonen’s disgusting portrayal of women

I’ve seen this countless of times in the many years I’ve watched anime. SasuS*ku from Naruto, Ichih*me from Bleach, Shinji and that oranged hair girl from Neon Evangelion.. Why do these women get decreased to simpletons with one single goal? And that is to obsess over a bland male lead who either treats them like trash or doesn’t notice them up until the last last chapter (LITERALLY WHAT YAMS HAS DONE). Some go even as far as the male leading wanting the kill the female love interest and yet the female lead is still in love with them???. It’s disgusting for him to write the MAIN female character this way.

It’s dissapointing we believed in Isayama doing Mikasa’s character right. That she’s finally being able to let go of her codependency and to live for herself maybe live in Hizuru and find more about her roots???, but every single time she shows some improvement, it’s burried deep in the ground again by the Author. It almost seems like a lowkey kink of some of the male Mangaka’s to write about a girl obsessing over them no matter what. I see this so many times to the point that I truly stand behind it that some of them might have this fantasy.

I wished he didn’t portray her last panels like this. Everyone else is living their lives while Mikasa is still grieving about him. I’m not saying she’s not allowed to grieve and everyone takes it at their own pace, but cmon... Show her living her life too. This is too much. Her being next to his grave and grieving him as her last panels just shoves it in our faces that YET AGAIN, BEING OBSESSED WITH AARON IS ALL HER CHARACTER STANDS FOR.

I truly despise how Isayama handles her grieving, kissing his decapacitated head, carrying it around like some handbag, and her last panels being thissss.

The world leaving Paradis alone miraciously after all that???

It’s so weird and out of place with so many political feuds and disagreements between the world and Paradis, the entire Rumbling happening and we can see Mikasa just chilling outside in Paradis with no one bothering them. You can see the rings of the walls in the picture below. I don’t know the exact reason behind as the manga is still in Korean, but from what I see, the story went the route of: throwing a happy ending without enough proper reason and it was all fixed just like that in a snap! It doesn’t fit the entire narrative of attack on titan for things to be so peacful out of nowhere. When it comes to the narrative, how things work in that world, how hard it is to achieve peace, everything made somewhat sense up until chapter 138. 139 seems so so out of place... It’s like I’m reading a chapter from a totally different manga.

Aaron Yoghurt got defeated so easily/ Aaron’s character assassination

The build up on the first part of the rumbling was great, those kids carrying coins. You could feel humanity’s fear and Aaron’s hatred in those pages. As if he truly had a goal and he has turned away completely from his comrades and his closest friends with no return. The world seemed truly doomed, but he got defeated just like that. He was in the nape all this time (because screw the warhammer power of hiding yourself elsewhere in his ginormous titan body). There is no master plan as we all expected, and in the end he just acts all yandere in the paths with Armin and that’s it... They massacared his entire character as well. Many fan theories created a better ending with his character. Him being reincarnated as Historia’s baby would be so much better. For him to still keep on seeking and to strive for power. It has always been his motive. It’s his personality from the start until chapter 138. Even if things are okay, to keep on going and to seek that adventure, but then.. He’s so weak and directionless suddenly.. It’s so weird... This is not Aaron at all???

Using Aaron for him this entire post, because I don’t want others to invade our tags... :)))

Historia’s baby

The only panel we got from Historia’s child was this. Just a normal kid, normal life... Why did Isayama put so much effort in highlighting Historia’s pregnancy if it was nothing too spectacular anyway? It seemed he had major plans for this kid and for their development too??? It’s again, big plans, big developments, big relationship dynamic, but all got thrown out of the window...

Don’t read the next sentence if you are a minor :’)

It’s like almost ejaculating, but stopping right before it and repeating that every single Arc.

My energy when writing about this chapter is the same as Nostalgia Critic and his hatred for atla the live action

In Conclusion...

I know us fans should not be deciding on how this story should end, because this is Isayama’s story after all, but I truly wished for him to wrap up things much more rounded. There are so many unanswered questions... Again, I think for the sake of being done with this manga, he rushed all of it. He’s become a millionaire from this story and now his pockets are jammed full, I guess he doesn’t need to put in any effort anymore, right? Perhaps a controversial opinion, but I really wished he cared for his fans a little bit more with this last chapter by giving some answers that make sense at least. It’s his fans who gave him this platform and the opportunity to tell his story and for him to at least give in a bit of effort especially in the last chapter is the least he can do. Rivamika being canon or not, he truly rushed it without thinking much about the entire story line. He expanded it so much, he didn’t know how to bind it all together.

Even after all this, I’ll still ship them in the headcanon type of way. I do give credit to Isayama for giving us a template for such a beautiful dynamic between Levi and Mikasa. He decides to waste it, but that doesn’t mean we have to. I want to thank all the people with amazing writing skills, the ones who give us beautiful art like @carmenlee @phit chan @vialesana and many more. I want to remind all of you that we can create something beautiful of our own and we don’t neccesarily need canon lore for that. The art I’ve seen, the fanfictions I’ve read have touched me deeper than Isayama ever could at times.The Mikasa in our mind is appreciate of Levi, is mature, classy and has a strong will for herself. They spend their remaining days together peacefully. Keep writing, keep drawing, stay creative.

I love you all so so much, I’ve only been publicly active since March, but thank you Rivamika fandom for giving me so much joy as a lurker these past 7 years <3

#rivamika #snk leaks #snk 139 leaks #levimika #mikalevi

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ultralovedeluxe · 3 years

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Yan! Josuke with prompts #19, #44, and #29

Hello everyone! This was requested by @mochimizuki121 , thank you for requesting! Feared that it came out ooc, that’s why it took so long. Not proud of this one, but I hope you enjoy it!

‘Please don’t cry, show me that smile I love so much!’

‘Did you really think you could escape?’

‘Stop denying our love! Stop denying our future together!’

Warnings: 18 year old Josuke, female reader, yandere behaviors, assault, manipulation, break-up, angst (?), some Okuyasu x reader, ooc, light nsfw, non/dub con, blackmail

A word to describe Higashikata Josuke would be, emotional. Yes, that’s the perfect way to describe him. He lets his feelings take over in situations, but most importantly, his feelings towards you were getting in the way of his friendship. But he won’t ever admit that

Yes..emotional was a perfect word to describe Higashikata Josuke..

Here he was again, listening to Okuyasu’s ramblings. Usually Josuke wouldn’t mind listening to his friend, after all it was a delight to hear his friend speak. If only his friend wasn’t talking about how cute you looked when you slept, or what noise you made when he would poke your cheek. It was painful to just keep smiling, seeing your best friend with the girl of his dreams together. Josuke wanted to be happy for his friend, but his jealously kept making it harder for him to just pretend everything’s fine.

He couldn’t understand how his friend could mange to get a catch like that. What did Okuyasu have that he didn’t? Wait, he can’t be thinking of something like that, he has to be happy for his friend..

“You should’ve seen her Josuke! She looked so cute when she came over! She was wearing that necklace I bought her along with a cute skirt, ah she looked amazing! I’m so lucky to have her” Okuyasu said letting out a dreamy sigh, as he continued to walk back home. The poor bastard was too in love to even notice Josuke’s burning rage. Josuke tried not to grit his teeth to what he was hearing, but ended up doing it anyway. Josuke let out a low chuckle, “Wow Okuyasu..that’s sounds great..wish I could’ve seen it too...” he mumbled. “What did you say Josuke?-” Okuyasu asked, looking back towards his pompadour-haired friend who was falling behind. “Nothing” Josuke said a little bit more louder and more clear this time.

A few more minutes into the walk, Okuyasu kept babbling about you, Josuke was really about to lose his cool; but he didn’t want to hurt his friend. After all he’s supposed to be happy for him. “So as I was saying, I’m thinking of getting her a necklace with those initials-”

“Okuyasu, have you ever imagined [first] with somebody else?” Josuke asked in the friendliest manner possible. Okuyasu looked at Josuke with confusion, “No, why do you ask that?” Josuke shrugged and threw his school bag over his shoulder, “Just curious man, you know [first] is a really cute gal, don’t you wonder how she’d look with somebody else?” Okuyasu shook his head, “No I never thought about it that way..But now that you mention it, she is kind of better than me right?” Okuyasu asked scratching the back of his head lightly. “I don’t know man, well I gotta get home, see ya tomorrow then Okuyasu”

“Right see ya tomorrow..”

Unfortunately for Okuyasu, Josuke knew what he was doing.

Today seemed perfect for you. You had woken up extra early just to prepare lunch for Okuyasu. You weren’t an expert on preparing Italian cuisine, but a few tips from Tonio helped you get the hang of it a bit. Either way, Okuyasu is going to eat it since he never brings lunch from home. Feeling satisfied with what you prepared for your boyfriend, you decide it’s time to finally head to school.

You didn’t live far from the school, so it was easy to get there in time. You sat near one of the open benches and sat the lunch you prepared earlier this morning. Usually you’d would start working on your homework before class began, but thankfully you’d done it last night; so now all you had to do for the remainder of your free period was wait for Okuyasu.

Minutes passed by and you finally saw Okuyasu walk up to campus. The wait was finally over, you ran up to Okuyasu and hugged him tight. “Good morning Oku! How’s Mansaku-san? Oh! Here’s your lunch for today, I stopped by Tonio’s to prepare that Italian dish you liked so much, I know it’s not good as his but-” Okuyasu cut you off, “[first] could we talk real quick?” he asked walking over to sit by a bench nearby. Confused, you follow after him and sit down beside him, “Alright, what is it you want to talk about?”. Okuyasu bit his lip slightly, although it looked as if he was holding back tears, “[first]-chan, you are one of the most amazing people I’ve ever met, but I’m not sure I deserve you as my girlfriend” he said rubbing the back of his neck. You chuckled nervously, “Oku, what are you saying? You know I love you so much-” Cutting you off again, Okuyasu wiped a forming tear from his eye, “I know you love me, and I love you too..but I’m not sure about us. You deserve someone better, I’m sorry [first]-chan, but I want to break up..” and with that Okuyasu got up from the bench and walked away. Leaving you alone with the Italian cuisine in your hands and a broken heart.

You ate spaghetti that you had eagerly prepared earlier this morning just for your precious..exboyfriend with tears running down your cheeks. Not even after hours of sitting in class thinking about your ex, you still didn’t understand why he broke up with you. You wanted to understand why he did it, but you still couldn’t. Seriously? After all you’ve done for him. You thought your relationship with the male would last, but you guess not. You wiped the tears from your face, the sweater you wore was damp from how much you were wiping your tears. You just couldn’t stop crying, the break up really hurt. Thank god no one else knew of this place in school, you couldn’t even imagine what you’d do if someone saw you like this.

“[first]-chan is that you!?” you heard a familiar voice call out to you. When you turned around to see who it was, you were met with the pompadour-haired male running down the hill to meet you. “Josuke? What are you doing here?” you asked before frantically wiping the tears from your face. Josuke sat down next to you, “I didn’t see you go through your usual road to lunch, so I went to go look for you..” he said before looking at you more seriously, “[first]-chan, were you crying?” he asked with a concerned tone in his voice. You sniffled “I wasn’t crying, its just allergies..”

“Bullshit! You’re eyes are red and puffy! Did someone hurt you, tell me their name and I swear I’ll make them pay!” you shook your head and managed to calm Josuke down. “No Josuke it’s not like that, it’s just..Okuyasu broke up with me that’s all..” you couldn’t manage to finish the rest of your sentence before you broke down crying. Josuke gave you a warm embrace, “Shh, it’s okay, I’m here..” He felt your tears go through his yellow shirt as you kept on sobbing. Josuke let you go and held your face up, “Let it all out [first]-chan” When he saw that you kept sniffling, he sighed and gave you a quick kiss on the forehead, “Please don’t cry [first]-chan, it hurts me so much to see you like this, ah cmon show me that smile I love so much!”. Once Josuke let go of your face, you rubbed your nose and smiled a bit before softly whispering a ‘thanks’. In truth, you still didn’t feel better, but you appreciate that Josuke is trying to at least make you feel something else other than misery. It was the thought that counted right?

Meanwhile, Josuke couldn’t be happier. Sure, it hurt to see you cry, but the important thing was is that you were single. And now that he comforted you in a time of crisis, he was sure now that it wouldn’t be long that you would start to feel the same way.

You still felt awful after your breakup with Okuyasu, its been hard especially when hanging out with your friend group. You and Okuyasu still speak to one another, but it’s just not the same. Speaking of which, you’ve been talking to Josuke a lot more lately. Ever since he had helped you get somewhat over your relationship with Okuyasu, he has been glued to your hip. He walks you to class, and always accompanies you for lunch (or anywhere really). You have to admit though, it was annoying at first having Josuke follow you around like a lost puppy, but you soon got used to it. After all, all Josuke wanted to do was help you. You thought it was sweet that Josuke wanted to help you, but that still didn’t explain why he was acting..let’s say odd.

Holding you by your hand as you walked by the halls, never inviting the others to hang out during the weekends (and here you thought Okuyasu was his best friend). It was almost as if he always had time for you.

Oh but that’s just a silly thought. Maybe you were the weird one for thinking that Josuke was acting strange. He’s just being a good friend, that’s all.

Josuke is just a really good friend.

The sun was shining bright in Morioh-cho, everything seemed so lively today. Everything from tourists popping out every now and then, to the squeals of teenage boys raging about the latest chapter in Pink Dark Boy. Today seemed like the perfect day for Josuke to finally get something off his chest. He had planned everything out for today. He had invited you over to Tonio’s to hang out for the day, and you had agreed. He had bought you some flowers to give you by the end of the day, he had even asked Rohan to draw something you might like (which the mangaka had reluctantly agreed to).

Josuke was prepared, he was oh so sure you were going to say yes. Of course you’re going to be his girlfriend! Why wouldn’t you be? He had hanged out you for the last couple of months, he had given you the right amount of attention you’d ever need. Everything was going according to plan.

“No, I’m sorry Josuke, but it’s a no”

Josuke couldn't’ believe the words that had just left your lips. No? After all he had done for you, your answer is no? This couldn’t be happening.

Josuke shook his head, and quickly rubbed his eyes with his sleeve (trying to hide the fact that he was about to shed a tear). “But why? Am I not enough for you? Is there someone else you like?-” the pompadour haired male asked, trying his best to not let his voice crack. You smiled and shook your head while caressing his cheek with your hand, “Josuke..in all honesty I only see you as a friend, nothing more” you let go of his cheek and sit down on a small gray bench that was near. “Josuke, you are really one of the best friends I could ever ask for, but I just don’t see myself dating you, and besides..” you took and deep breath “Despite all that happened, I’m still in love with Oku, and I don't know maybe I'm just not ready for a relationship at the moment, y'know? But we can still be friends right?" you said, blushing lightly at the thought of your ex boyfriend. You'd expect that Josuke would've taken the rejection lightly, after all you were kind enough to still remain friends with the male.

Josuke however, did not take the news lightly as you thought he would. Almost immediately, Josuke had grabbed you by your hands and pulled you close to him. "Why do you still love Okuyasu after he broke your heart!? Why don't you love me, I've done nothing but give you adoration!". You looked at your friend in extreme fear, you didn't know what to do in this situation. "Josuke let me go you're hurting me! If you don't stop I'll-" you stuttered your words out. Josuke was just looking at you with a menacing glare, "Or what? You'll call Okuyasu? Stop thinking about him already! Just date me please, I loved you for so long! Longer than he has" You shook your head, you were starting to get fed up with his behavior, did he not understand what 'no' meant? "I said no Josuke! I don't want to date you! And if you think I will after this you're fucking stupid-!"

Before you knew it Josuke had slapped you, but due to his strength, the slap didn't feel like a slap at all. "I'm sorry [first]-chan but now you see what happens when you don't just agree with me. You need to stop denying our love! You know you love me, so please stop denying our future together!". You couldn’t believe the words that were coming from Josuke’s mouth. Were these obsessed, disgusting words truly coming from Josuke? Sweet, and caring Josuke. While you were lost in your thoughts, Josuke took this opportunity to grab you and hold you close to his chest. “I’m sorry for hurting you [first]-chan, but what you said really hurt me so I-” he stopped for a second and leaned his head closer to yours just to take a small sniff of your hair. You just smelled so good, he had to do it. You smelled like the coconut shampoo you had bought recently. And your perfume was different this time too. He knew he could overpower you at any time, so he took his chance and caressed your breasts softly with his hands. Along with this, he rubbed against your backside and groaned into your ear. He imagined it was him thrusting inside you. He imagines how warm you must feel. Or how cute you’d look when you were on the verge of climax.

Him grinding against you and touching you was the last straw, you knew you had to get away from him. You turned around and looked at Josuke with both disgust and fear, and then you ran. You didn't want to be in his presence any longer. Here you thought that Josuke was a good friend trying to help you in a time you needed the most. But he’s just some asshole who needed to learn when a woman says no is no. How upsetting, you only wished that the incident didn’t exist.

But for Josuke, those few moments felt almost heavenly. Grinding against you felt so good, he wanted more, but you just had to get away didn’t you? He watched you run off to who knows where. He knew he’d get you eventually, he just had to be patient. But his patience wouldn’t last long.

For at least three weeks you have completely avoided Josuke and your friend group. You ignored all their calls, because the farther you were from Josuke, the safer you felt. You wanted to forget that day you hung out with Josuke. You wished you just never went to that damn Italian restaurant. Maybe then he would never have confessed his ‘love’ for you (that is more obsession than love in your book). Maybe then none of this would have happend. But alas here we are.

The telephone rang and you overheard your mother speak with what sounded like Yukako. “[first], dear it’s for you! It’s your friend Yukako!” your mother shouted. You held the phone and answered. “[first]-chan where have you been? Are you okay? We’ve been worried. You didn’t come across a stand user have you?” Yukako asked concerned. You lied, “No, I haven’t, trust me even if I did I wouldn’t notice. I’m fine I’ve just been..stressed, that’s all..” you lied, you didn’t want anyone to know about your situation with Josuke. “Well that’s good. So I was wondering if you wanted to hang out with me and Koichi-kun today. We were thinking of going to the beach just for the weekend”.

At first you were hesitant, you didn’t want to see Josuke, but you did want to see your friends since you missed them. And if it was just Yukako, Koichi, and potentially Okuyasu, then you were down to go. You sighed and agreed. It wouldn’t hurt to see your friends once more, and to be honest you were excited.

Yukako planned on picking you up and then walking to the beach, which you had agreed on. However, when she went to pick you up, she had brought some company. She brought Koichi (of course), Okuyasu, and to your horror, Josuke. Not once did Yukako mention that she was bringing Josuke along. Throughout the whole car ride you felt uncomfortable. You felt Josuke’s eyes watching your every move. It didn’t help that everyone else was having fun, while you were paranoid.

Arriving at the beach, things got worse. Josuke was behind you at all times, and really if people weren’t around you would have yelled at him to leave you alone. Unfortunately you couldn’t do that. Not with Okuyasu and the rest of your friends here at least.

You excused yourself to the bathroom just to get away from Josuke, and you could say that those three minutes you spent alone in the bathroom, were the best minutes you had in your life up until this point. You then heard the doorknob jiggle, so you walked over to it and unlocked it. “Yukako is that you? I’m almost done let me just-” you gasped at the sight, but before you could react, Josuke had covered your mouth and locked you both in the bathroom.

You whimpered and tried to scream but it was no use, Josuke was using Crazy Diamond to close your mouth. You heard Josuke chuckle, “You know its really cute when you think you can run away from your future boyfriend [first]-chan. Did you really think you could escape me?” he said. You felt as if he was mocking you. Things escalated from bad to worse as Josuke began to kiss your neck. Kisses went from heated bites on your neck, then sloppy, inexperienced kisses from Josuke. He had your breasts exposed, since he ripped your top immediately. You tried to remain emotionless throughout this whole session, but Josuke noticed, so he pinched your nipple to get a reaction. And a reaction he got as you released a muffled moan from your covered lips. “Please stop..” you whimpered.

You heard Okuyasu shout from outside, “Hey [first]-chan! Are you good in there?”. You wanted to cry for help, but Josuke bent you over and slapped your ass, “Go ahead doll, tell him you’re okay..” he whispered. Crazy Diamond lowered it’s hand from your mouth to let you speak. Josuke raised your head up, “And remember, if you yell for help, I’ll open this door right now and show Okuyasu how much of a whore you look-”

“I-i’m okay! Just a bit dizzy! I’ll be out soon!” you told him, you didn’t want Okuyasu to see you like this. “Okay! Just call me if you need anything” and with that you didn’t hear from the husky voiced male anymore, but you heard Josuke whisper in your ear,

“That’s my good girl...”

#yandere imagines #yandere x reader #yandere jjba #yandere josuke #yandere jojo's bizarre adventure #yandere josuke higashikata #jjba imagines #josuke higashitaka #yandere headcanons #Jojo no Kimyou na Bouken #JoJo's Bizarre Adventure #jojo x reader #yandere josuke x reader #not proud of this one but oh well

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sinnaminsuga · 3 years

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Title: Money Counter Part 2

Summary: Just the filthy continuation of the first part of this mess

Word Count: 2629

Warnings: smut, power struggle, slapping, choking, rough sex, a tad violent, a little blood, daddy!kink, i think that's it if i missed something let me know!

A/N: hello again! the beautiful @connieisland popped into my messages and inspired me to make a part 2 to my latest fic and this is what i came up with! feedback is appreciated! thank you for reading! ❤️

Link To Part 1: right here

Tags: @october505 @infinite-shite @hope-to-hell @inlovewithhisblueeyes @littlefreya @viking-raider @wolvesandhoundshowltogether @foodieforthoughts @raspberrydreamclouds @wendimydarling @oddsnendsfanfics @its--fandom--darling @the-soot-sprite @connieisland @feralrunaway @oddduckthatgirl

There was no mistaking the groan and shudder that ran through that dangerous man’s body when you spoke softly into his ear. “Now. Let's talk about your punishment for doubting me. You'll be a good boy for me, won't you darling?”

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Henry’s grip tightened on your waist. “I demand control in all aspects of my life. I don't give that up easily.” he growled.

“So I'll just take. What. I. Want.” you hissed, shoving him backwards swiftly, his broad back hitting the sturdy wood of the table with a muted thud. His eyes widened in surprise at the quick change of his position. Before he could really even adjust, you straddled his waist and leaned down to suckle at the soft tender skin of his neck. You wedged your hands between the already straining buttons of his dress shirt and pulled as hard as you could, sending the buttons flying in every direction. Henry groaned as your lips continued their assault down his now bare chest. You moved slowly and lapped at the skin above his waistband as your hands palmed at his solid length through his pants.

“Well fuck! Are you going to do something or what? I'm dying here!” He all but whined, hands scrabbling for purchase, meeting nothing but loose hundred dollar bills. You giggled to yourself as you fondled him, doing no more and no less than you had been. His hands crumpled the copious amounts of money and as he became frustrated with your lack of desire to do anything but fuck with him, he threw the cash as a feral scream tore from his throat.

Suddenly you were the one at a loss for words as your body was pulled up and flipped over onto your back, thrown into the position Henry was just in. Henry hovered above you, eyes frantically scanning your dress clad form. “Too much.” was all he ground out, not unlike a caveman, before using one hand to tear your dress right down the middle, and making quick work of your panties as well. “HENRY! Do you know how much that dress cost?!” You shrieked, slamming your fists into his chest.

He caught your flailing limbs and pinned them on either side of your head. “Don't care. Get you a new one later. Fuck baby, I can smell you. Like raspberries. And sugar.” Henry moaned lowly, running his nose along your jugular, sharp teeth grazing over your buzzing skin. You couldn't stop the shiver that wracked your body, your sensitive core pulsing around nothing.

“Needy little thing aren't you? You want me? Tell me you do. Because I want you. More than anything. Say you want me, want this, and I’ll take you to levels of ecstasy you’ve never even thought of. Would you like that?” Henry whispered, his knuckles running over your steadily weeping entrance. You whined out a “yes”, lifting your hips looking for friction.

As soon as he got your permission, Henry was on you, his thick strong tongue diving into your lush cavern. You fell victim to his honey coated tongue and soft hums rumbling from his chest. He repeatedly flicked his tongue over your sensitive clit with the vigor of a starving man, pulling sugar sweet moans from your throat. He used his thumbs to pull your folds apart and marvel at the depraved sight that was your aching cunt. You flinched a bit when you felt the pads of Henry’s fingers ghosting over your most sensitive place. He ran his fingers through the sticky sweet slick dripping from you, coating them thoroughly before raising them to his mouth and sucking them clean. The animalistic growl that tore its way out of him was something you’d never grow tired of hearing. When he sank his tongue back into you and curled it in such a way that it rubbed against that spongy flesh inside you, your hand flew to his thick mass of curls atop his head. You could feel him grin against your damp flesh before he lifted his gaze to meet yours.

“Come on sweetheart. Beg me for it. Beg me to cum.” He hissed with a grin. The smile on his face wavered just a fraction when he felt your sharp nails dig into his scalp, sending sparks of pain shooting down his spine.

Tightening your fist around the handful of his hair you had in your hand, you pulled his head up and met his eyes with fury burning in yours. “Fuck you. I don’t beg for a goddamn thing. Never have. Never will.” You ground out between your teeth. Never breaking eye contact with you, he huffed out a laugh and said “Then I guess, I'll just. Take. What. I. Want.”

With a speed you've never experienced, you were flipped over onto your stomach, breasts mashed against the now forgotten money. You attempted to push yourself up onto your forearms but Henry’s broad hand quickly shoved you back down. The lack of control agitated you and you turned as much as you could in his grasp, wriggling your way into a half turned position. Henry attempted to turn you back onto your front and your palm connected with his cheek with a resounding CRACK that echoed in the room.

The force of the slap you delivered had split his lower lip after it collided with his bottom teeth. Henry brought his thumb to his mouth to assess the wound, blood coating his fingertip. You raised an eyebrow at him as if to say “What are you going to do about it?”. A wicked grin split his face, baring his glittering white teeth to you. “Oh you little bitch! You asked for it.” Henry bellowed, his hands once again finding your waist and manhandling you to your front where he had you before. The only difference was his massive hand pressing the side of your face into the wood of the table.

The metal clanging of his belt coming undone sent your body into a frenzy, your pussy clamping down hard around nothing but air. The soft rustle of fabric being pulled down was followed by the sound Henry moaning just a bit as his hand made contact with his engorged manhood. You managed to turn your head under his hand just to get a glimpse of his glorious cock. You knew it would be massive, no one carried themselves around like Henry did if they weren't packing some serious heat.

His erection stood proudly at the apex of his thighs and you shuddered at what you saw next. He held his length out steady, and let a mouthful of spit pour out from between his pillowy lips to land directly onto his shaft. He wiped the excess drool from his mouth with the back of his hand before using it to pump himself, his own spit slicking the way. You keened, watching him intently. When he was ready, he leaned in close so his mouth was against the shell of your ear and his tip notched against your opening.

“I want to fuck you now. But I don't know if you deserve it. Submit to me, wildling,-” you stiffened beneath him, ready to fight him off again, but he continued speaking with his hushed tone. “-and I’ll make you touch the stars. It doesn't make you weak, to let someone else take care of you, you know. I know what you want, what you need, sweetheart but I need to hear you say it. Let me give it to you. Cmon baby.” he murmured.

You weren't ready to say anything just yet and he could tell, so he slowly slid the tip of himself into you, punching out a whimper from your chest. But then he stopped. No movement, nothing. “You can have the rest if you use your words, love. Cmon. Just say it. I gotta hear you say it. Please please please.” Henry rambled, his forehead pressed to the side of your head. Your cunt squeezed around what small piece of him had pushed inside of you, attempting to suck him in further. You burned with need, the ache almost becoming painful. You gritted your teeth, trying to wait him out for about another minute. Then you gave in, the need coursing through you taking over and making you a soft, pliant, whimpering mess. You fell limp against the table and tried to push back onto him.

“Oh god please! I cant take it anymore! I cant go another minute without you inside me! Please oh god please Henry please fuck me please I’m begging you!” you cried, begging was foreign to you and it caused shame and tears to soak your cheeks. Henry brushed your hair behind your ear as he tutted at you. “See? Was that so hard darling? I’ll give you what you need. Shhh don't cry. I'm gonna make it all better okay?” He cooed, lapping up the briney tears that streaked your face as he pushed into you. He bottomed out inside you and you howled with the feeling of being so complete. He pulled back and slammed into you again, his tip kissing your cervix.

“Jesus fucking christ woman you're so tight. Like a god damn virgin. You take me so well. Do you feel me? Here?” Henry splayed his massive hand over your lower stomach. You were unable to form coherent thoughts or words so you nodded as best you could. His palm once again slid up your back and sunk into the hair at the back of your head. He roughly yanked your head back causing you to gasp and sputter. “I'm going to fuck you like an animal. I’m not going to be nice and i'm not going to be gentle but that's what you want isn't it?” Henry spat, his hips beginning to piston his cock in and out of you at a rapid pace. He kept spewing filth into your ear as he moved in and out of you, grinding your clit against the table causing the most delicious sensation that teetered on the razor thin edge of pleasure and pain.

“I’m going to fill you up over and over and over again until your hungry little hole is spilling over with my cum. I want to see it drip out of you. Maybe I’ll give you a baby, would you like that, little one? Yeah I want to see you round with my child.” Henry spewed his heated words as his heavy length plundered your channel. Your walls squeezed him, attempting to force him out but also suck him back in at the same time. Your body moved against the table but your brain was mush. He hooked his hand under your left knee and pulled your leg up to rest on the table, opening you further. He tipped his hips at just the right angle, hitting that spot inside you causing you to scream out.

“Oh god yes Daddy!” rolled off your lips and you felt Henry’s rhythm falter.

“Oh sweetheart, I could get used to that. Say it again. Let me hear you.” he moaned.

“Fuck me Daddy! P-please! I-i need to c-cum!” you whined, pathetic and broken. Henry stopped moving for just long enough to gently turn you over onto your back, never slipping out of you. He picked up his pace once again before answering.

“Go ahead pretty girl. Cum on my cock. Yeahhhh just like that baby. Fuck! You're squeezing me so tight” he snarled, massive hands tightening and bruising your waist. You felt the coil in the pit of your stomach snap as you came around him, sparks of unbelievable pleasure shooting up your spine and radiating out to the tips of your fingers. Bliss took over your body and a strangled cry clawed it's way up your throat and out into the hot air between you two.

Henry kept fucking into you as you rode out the aftershocks of your orgasm, drawing little “Ah!” sounds from your sweet mouth. He halted his movements long enough to lift your naked form into his arms to continue fucking you while in the air. You noted the fact that you were moving around the room but you didn't know where and to be honest you didn't really care as most of your attention was firmly focused on the slick rod impaling you repeatedly. Suddenly your back met the wood of the door and Henry’s right hand snaked it's way up and settled around your vulnerable throat, applying a good amount of pressure.

“Cmon baby give me another one. I know you can. Give it to me. Give it to Daddy, yeah?” Henry barked through clamped teeth, hammering up into you harder and harder with every thrust. His hand on your throat tightened, limiting your speech. That hand left your neck and weaseled it's way between your bodies to rub fast tight little circles over your clit causing you to gasp. Henry rushed forward and licked into your open mouth and your hands flew to his shoulders, sinking your nails into the supple flesh. Neither of you realized how hard he was railing you against the door until you heard the splintering of wood and the crash of metal as the locking mechanism in the door gave way at the same time that you came around his throbbing length once again. There was now a hole in the door but neither of you gave a fuck. Henry pulled you tight against his chest and continued to piston in and out of you at a near punishing pace, now chasing his own high.

“Fuck! I-i’m gonna cum sweetheart. I’m gonna cum inside you. Fill you up real good. Put a baby in you. God fuc- shit! Oh my god!” Henry roared and thrashed like an animal as he shot deep inside you, soothing your aching womb with his seed.

He lowered you both to the ground so you were straddling his lap, still full of him. You rested your head on his shoulder, the both of you panting desperately attempting to fill your lungs with the sex-thick air. Henry's fingers danced up your spine as you relaxed against him.

“We made quite the mess, young lady.” he mumbled, nudging you to turn your head and look. The money you had been tasked with counting now littered the entire room, your supplies for banding the stacks of cash strewn about the floor.

“Yes I suppose we did. Wanna make another one?” You snickered, tightening your walls around his softening length inside you. He let out a low hiss before delivering a light snack to your ass.

“Let me get you to my bedroom first, you heathen.” Henry remarked with a grin as he planted a kiss on your shoulder. “Well cmon then Daddy. Show me what else you got.” You giggled with your hands on either side of his face.

Henry’s broad frame shook with his laughter before he looked you in the eyes, his glinting with mischief. His tongue ran up the column of your throat, lapping up the salty sweat glistening on your skin before whispering “Oh I’ll show you what I’ve got darling. Don't you worry.”

Your response died on your lips as his teeth sank into the meat of your shoulder. This man had ruined you for anyone else. And you couldn't find it in yourself to even pretend to be mad about it.

THE END

#henry cavill #the cavillry #henry x reader #henry cavill smut

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a-purple-lizard · 3 years

Note

Could you please do a Kabal x F!Reader

Where the reader hates the fact that he’s in the black dragons but she still loves him. So could you please write something of a love and hate relationship

With smut please 🥺

Swift dragon

Kabal x female reader

[This post is NSFW]

I’m am SO sorry this took so long, I had major writers block with this one. Personally, kabal isn’t my cup of tea, I’ve just never got the appeal to him, but I hope I did him justice.

But seriously, if anybody has any Kabal tips, please tell me! I would greatly appreciate it!

[FINAL WARNING, NSFW BELOW THE LINE]

Cold wind blew through the rugged streets, whistling as it passed through poorly made shacks and campfires. At least a hundred people, including small children and babies, were gathered around the small fires. Their clothes were little more than rags. Suddenly, a woman approached out of the darkness.

She held out her palm, allowing the homeless people of outworld to hastily take the food she has offered them. S/o smiled sadly at the children who attempted to give their food to their parents, only to be rejected. She wished she had enough to feed all of them.

After she ran out of the bread that she handed out, she swiftly climbed up only a nearby rooftop. The air stunk with smoke and human waste. “What’s up s/o? Come to visit me?”

Her heart jolted from her chest, turned around, tackling the man with a hug. He yelped at the sudden contact as s/o peppered his face with kisses. The two turned into a giggling mess as s/o sat up, straddling his thighs. Her smile suddenly melted into bitter resentment when she saw the black dragon uniform. “Babe? What’s wrong?”

“Tell me, kabal, how many children did you steal from today?” She asked coldly, getting off of him. Kabal quickly scrambled to his feet, following her to the edge of the building.

“H-hey! What’s up with that accusation?” He demanded, sitting beside her, his legs dangling off the edge.

“A month ago, half these people lived in small houses. When Kano and his goons started to charge a “protection fee” they were reduced to living out here in the cold.” Her tone held an edge to it. “So tell me kabal, when you were out collecting, how many kids did you see?”

The way kabal grimaced and turned away reminded s/o of a child who knew he was wrong was but too stubborn to admit it. “It's just business, babe. Nothin personal.”

“You’re right, it isn’t personal. Who the hell cares about starving civilians? Not the emperor, not Kano, and sure as hell not you.” Her cold voice growled. “Just business, they’re just numbers to you, specifically check numbers.”

Suddenly, s/o let out a grunt as she was pinned to the ground. Kabal stared down at her, anger in his eyes. “Don’t you put that on me.”

“Oh I’m sorry, is reality ruining your little bad boy with a cause complex?” She yelled, struggling against him, “wake the fuck up, look around, these are real people, like you and me, that you are hurting!”

“Why are you so worried about what I do!? Why can’t you just mind your own damn business!?” He yelled, his grip bruising her wrist.

“Because I love you goddammit!” S/o cried out, kabal froze at her words, grip loosening. The woman below him had tears running down her face, “I love you, more than you know. Watching you burn away your soul like this… it hurts. You’re a good guy, but Kano is corrupting you! And you’re letting him!”

Kabals eyes drifted from her for a second, clouding over with some unfamiliar emotion. The raging storm within his soul was put on pause by a soft hand on his cheek. S/o gave him a weak look. “Please, Kabal, listen. Leave the black dragon, leave Kano.”

“It isn’t that easy.” He mumbled, easing his lower body onto hers. The weight was comforting to s/o as she lifted her head to place a soft kiss into his lips. The man quickly returned it, passionately and desperate. His fingers locked around hers, pressing her down harder beneath him.

Kabals lips broke from hers and latched onto her throat. He hummed as he dragged his mouth across her skin, the rhythmic sound was intoxicating. “No, but I can make it easier.” She whispered.

A startled groan tumbled from his mouth as an knee pressed up between his thighs. S/o could feel the hardness of him through his pants. With agonizingly slow movements, she rubbed her leg up and down. His grip tightened with a growl.

“Is this your way of persuading me?” He grunted, grinding onto her leg. His mouth broke away from her flesh, he looked down atp her, eyes clouded with lust. “Cause it just might work.”

S/o leaned upwards, planting a soft kiss on his lips before pushing him back. The man fell on his back with an oof. Before kabal could even make sense of the action, s/o was atop him.

Placing a hand down onto him, she gently cupped his cheek. He sighed and leaned into it ever so slightly. “Promise me.”

Her thighs clenched around his wait as she steadily grinded into him. He grunted and tried to buck his hips up in pleasure. “I’ll only let you have me, if you promise to leave the black dragon.”

“B-babe- fuck. This is hardly fair, cmon- ah!” S/o slid her hand under her, massaging the hardness between his legs. Kabal seethed and writhed, nails digging into the ground. His eyes rolled back as she unzipped his pants, allowing her fingers to slip in.

Kabal tried to sit up, hand reaching for her breast, only to he pushed back down with her free hand. “Touch me, and I’ll stop.”

Helpless groans and pleas fell from his mouth, turning into moans of pleasure as her hands continued. She rubbed, squeezed and even licked the piece of flesh in her hand, watching each reaction as she did. “Fuck, s/o I’m close.”

Speeding up her movements, he was practically fucking her fist as he arched his back, mouth agape. He was so close only a little more-

Her touch quickly disappeared just as his high was at its brink. The man whined, trying to touch himself, but s/o didint allow him. “S/o, please, cmon.”

“Not until you promise me!” Her hands crashed on either side of his head, staring into his eyes. Her gaze held anger, sadness, regret, love? “You’re better then this, I know you are. Please.”

“I’ll- I’ll only take jobs that don’t hurt civilians, how about that?” He rasped out, at a lost for breath. “I won’t do anymore protection frees, I’ll just do regular old assassination jobs, only for people who deserve it. Bad people.”

S/o frowned, but the heat of her gaze had subsided, she sighed. “I suppose that’s the most I can get out of you at the moment.” Closing her eyes, she rolled on her back beside him. “You better get the most out of me. While I’m still around.”

Despite the threat, Kabal could hear true despair in her tone. She really did love him. Guilt clouded Kabal as he mounted her thighs. Normally there was no slow moments of intamcy, only a deep connection of mutual unspoken passion as they mercilessly merged their body’s. Tonight, that would be different.

S/o flinched in surprise when she felt a soft, pleading kiss flutter on her lips. Her wide eyes stared up as his desperate gaze. There was genuine fear and sadness. “Kabal?”

“Hey, look.” His voice was breathless as he spoke. “You are, the best thing that’s ever happened to me. You have treated me like a human being, which is more then I can say for others. I know, I’m a scum bag, I know I’m everything you’re not. But at the end of the day, you love me, no matter what I do.”

S/o smiled up at him, “I try to hate you, but everytime I try, I just end up loving you more.”

Kabal laughed, giving her a smug look, “guess I’m just that good lookin.” That earned a playful elbow in the back. He laughed once again, “ok, ok, I’ll shut up now. I’ll make you feel good.”

“Yeah?” S/o smiled as Kabal started to unbutton her shirt, exposing cleavage as she wrapped her arms around him.

“Yeah.” His lips connected with hers in a kiss. Hands crept down her body, fingertips tracing her skin, grabbing onto her thighs and separating them. Kabal placed himself between her legs, his pants were still unzipped, his problem was out in the cold air.

Kabal hovered atop her, kiss becoming much more heated as she bit his lip, demanding he give her entrance. He smugly chuckled, holding back a remark as her tongue assaulted his. After a short battle of dominance, s/o was declared the winner as she hastily explored his wet cavern.

Ripping her shirt open and unclipping her bra, sliding it off and throwing it to the side, kabals mouth ripped from her kiss and latched into her breast. S/o released a whiny moan, nails digging into his back as began to lick and suck all over. His tongue traced her skin, searching her the right spot.

Her mouth opened with a gasp as Kabal located a tender scrap of skin and began to abuse it. Biting down in it, only to suck it between his teeth. That was definitely going to leave a Mark.

S/o grinded upwards into his exposed groin. The man moaned slightly, hand reaching down to unzip her pants. His fingers slipped past her panties and into her soaked folds of sensitive flesh. He rubbed and slid his fingers around each crevice, leaving s/o a pleading mess. “Fuck... just fucking do it already.”

“As my girl commands.” He teased breathlessly, positioning himself at her entrance. His fingers took hold of her wrist, pinning them above her head as he entered her at an agonizingly slow pace, allowing himself to stretch out her inner walls. S/o writhed beneath him, clumsy moans dripping from her mouth.

He then proceeded to fuck her brains out. He was FAST like, ridiculously fast. Not superpower fast, but it was clear that he was going to make s/o pay for her teasing.

Hands tangled in hair and nails dug into skin as he drilled into her. She early met his thrust with her own, hips slamming hard enough to leave bruises. Neither of them cared.

Leaning over, his mouth assaulted hers, this time he took complete control of her mouth, invading it as he pleased. The two groaned into the kiss as his thrust became heavier, slower, sloppier.

S/o was left gasping for air as Kabal left her mouth, his saliva decorating her lips. He trailed down kisses from the corner of her mouth to the crook of her neck. His teeth met her flesh, biting and sucking.

They were both getting close already. S/o cried out each time he slammed into her, her face was pure ecstasy. “Kabal! Fuck... I’m-“

“Yeah, me too babe.” He rasped out, grip tightening as his thrust became desperate and rough until finally the knot in s/o’s stomach snapped. The two slammed their faces together, keeping eachother grounded as their release washed over them.

Kabal let go of her wrist, his hands tangling themselves in her hair. One hand drifted down to her side to rub comforting circles in her flesh. His chest steady rose up and down, the rhythmic movement against her made s/o relax her body unde him.

The high started to go down as they broke away. They simply remained still as they caught their breaths. Kabals raspy gulps of air turned into a cocky chuckle, “sombody enjoyed that.”

S/o was too exhausted to playfully slap him, instead she just gave him a look which earned a laugh. “Shut up and take me to wherever your staying. I’m tired.”

“Oh, so we can fuck on the rooftop with pigeons staring at us, but sleeping here? That’s fucking disgusting.” That one gave her the strength to slap him.

#mortal kombat #mortal kombat x reader #mk kabal #kabal x reader #kabal

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zayray030 · 3 years

Text

Ramble

Summary: Spencer knew that his tendency to ramble has at times frustrated people but he thought that at least the BAU wouldnt mind. Guess he thought wrong. OR 4 times someone told him to shut up and 1 time someone told him to ramble

Spencer rambled a lot. It was conman knowledge. He especially seemed to ramble when he was either anxious, scared, injured or with someone he was close with.

When Spencer had been younger he had regretted rambling so much. Maybe if he hadn't rambled so much his father would still be with him. If he hadn't rambled so much maybe, just maybe he wouldn't have been bullied so much. Maybe he could have a happier life.

Anyway, he shouldn't think like that! He had a new, even better family. The BAU had accepted every part of his weirdness with limited questions and light teasing.

The BAU had especially adapted his rambling tenancies and listened to him when he rambled. Most times anyway.

I mean, Spencer couldn't exactly blame them. Not everybody could continue having the patience of a saint. Some people tended to snap when too much was handed to them. Spencer guesses he was the too much they couldn't handle.

He knew that the team didn't mean to be hurtful. It just hurt that the people he thought he could trust were just so…cold when they wanted him to be quiet. But they were.

And Spencer didn't know what hurt the most. The fact that he wasn't shocked that they had gotten tired of him or the fact that they did.

Instance one where people had too much of him (Maybe talking about the importance of healthy eating wasn't a good idea)

Spencer and Morgan had been at the lunchroom when Spencer had noticed that all Morgan had was a protein shake, two cookies and milk.

Those weren't nearly enough calories to be able to power Morgan up! Especially considering the older agent had the tendency to overtrain himself to get more muscled.

“You know that isn't enough right?” Spencer asked, gesturing to the measly meal in front of Morgan.

Spencer missed the look that Morgan sent him and continued rambling about the health and safety of having limited food and the dangers that can do to the body. Just as he was about to start rambling again Morgan cut him off, harshly.

“Listen, thanks kid but I don't exactly need health tips from a skinny twig. How about you shut up and just let me eat in silence, okay?” and without waiting for Spencer’s reply Morgan up and left, not bothering to look behind him.

If he had he would have seen the heartbroken expression on the younger agent. He would have seen the slight fear in his eyes at the thought of another person is his life leaving him.

Spencer looked down at his meal and shook his head out of any thoughts to do with Morgan just being a tad bit rude with how he wanted Spencer to be quiet.

He should have just kept quiet and not spoken. This was all on him. He shouldn't have bothered the older man. He'd be quiet around him to make him happier.

Instance two where people had too much of him (Maybe he shouldn't ask someone if they need help from now on.)

Spencer was making his way to Garcia’s office. Maybe spending some time with the older woman would help but his mind at ease with what happened with Derek. She might even offer him a solution!

However, when he walked in there it was too see Garcia focusing on something on her screen.

“Hey Garcia!” he said happily. He hadn't been able to have an actual conversation with the other in a long time and he wanted to just rant with her. She was the most patient with him and sometimes even joined in with some of his ramblings.

“Hey Spence” she greeted distractedly. Maybe that was one of the clues that Spencer should have taken and left the older girl to her devices before coming back, but he was too stressed and he wanted to talk to his ranting partner.

“Did you know that…” and he continued rambling about the dangers of constantly staring at your screens (we'll just ignore the slight hypocrisy) when he stopped when García banged her hand on the table.

The boy jumped and turned to look at the girl in a mix of confusion and fear. The blonde took a deep breath before turning back to Spencer.

“Listen, Spencer. I love you, okay pumpkin? But currently, I need to do this so please shut up.” and she spun her chair back around and continued back to what she was doing.

Spencer took that as his cue to leave. The other didn't notice as the genius of the BAU turned around and left her office. She didn't notice the dejected look on his face as he turned away, sure that this was another person who was tired of him.

Instance three where people had too much of him (Maybe he shouldn't be asking questions. He is a genius after all)

He hadn't been able to understand why the unsub had the tendency to put a picture of their victims' happiest moments near their dead body and had gone to Rossi to explain it to him.

Not his brightest moments he would admit to that.

He had approached the older man in hopes of learning more from him but maybe he should have done it when the man was feeling better. But it was hard to tell with that man whenever Spencer was around him. He would always have a constant scowl. Maybe he should have taken that as a sign to not continue speaking.

“But why?” Spencer continued to wheedle. He had hated not knowing something. It was truly frustrating.

“Listen, kid.” the older man snapped, turning to glare at the genius. “Maybe for once it would do you some good to not know something. Or maybe just use your genius brain to figure this out. Either way, shut up and stop bothering me!” the older man was almost yelling by now but he lowered his voice at the last minute, making it sound like a vicious hiss. Spencer couldn't help but feel like that felt worse.

Before he could respond to the other, Rossi had turned around and stalked off, muttering things about kid geniuses being a pain in the ass.

Another person left him. Maybe he really was the problem for everything going down.

Instance four where people had too much of him (Maybe he should stop trying to explain things to people. It never turns out well in the end)

Emily and JJ had been talking about a new campaign thing they can do and Spencer had decided to drop in his two cents. Big mistake.

Just as he was about to go into detail about the various colours and where they come from, Emily put her hand up.

“Listen, Reid. Not that we don't appreciate your input.” she began, shooting him a tight smile. The same smile his father would have whenever he explained anything to the older man.

“We don't.” cut in JJ, before stuffing a dorito in her mouth.

“We would much rather you shut up and leave and let us handle this on our own. We don't need or want you to explain this to us.” Emily continued as if she hadn't heard the blonde.

Spencer didn't say anything, just nodded and shakily stood up. He walked out quickly, the only tung he could hear behind him is Emily and JJ talking about the campaign again.

He had lost two people in one go. He hadn't thought he would be able to hit that number after he sent his mother to the asylum. He truly was alone again.

And one instance where someone hadn't had enough of him (A.K.A Aaron Hotchner is the best)

Aaron was confused. Now, this wasn't exactly unusual. In this job, you tended to become really confused when dealing with the crazy things that happened in the BAU.

No, what confused him was the youngest member of the BAU. One Spencer Reid.

Once again, this wasn't exactly shocking. The young genius tended to confuse things with his ramblings about the most random things. Some people would find it annoying but Aaron found it quite endearing. Whilst he might not understand what the genius was blabbering about, he found it nice that the younger man would let down his guard enough to not care what he was talking about and just let things be free.

He also couldn't say anything when those sparkly eyes were targeted at him but no way was he going to admit to that. If anybody found out they would use it to get away with almost anything. Especially Morgan. Aaron inwardly shuddered at the chaos that would cause.

So that's why the agent couldn't possibly understand why Spencer wasn't rambling to him and why he seemed almost scared about even going near him.

“Hey, Reid?” and he couldn't help but feel slight anger when Spencer jumped and flinched when he called his name.

Not anger at Spencer, never. Anger at whoever had hurt him yes.

“Y-yeah?” and the younger man winced before starting again. “I mean yeah Hotch?” and he was fidgeting with his sleeve, looking anywhere but him.

Aaron shot the younger man a look, not liking the lack of rambling.

“I was wondering if you could tell me something about the stars.” and it was an absolutely pathetic attempt at a conversation and he knew that, but he was getting desperate now.

“Umm, well they're up in the sky.” answered the younger man, words coming out more awkwardly than intended and both men winced.

“Cmon. I'm sure there's more than that in your big head. Come on. Tell me more.” the older man encouraged, a small smile on his face.

Spencer shot him a surprised look, and Hotch couldn't help but feel confused.

“Umm well, did you know that…” and hearing the younger ramble made him relax ever so slightly. It was just one of those things that once you get used to it feels too weird not to be around anymore.

However, Hotch’s peace was interrupted by the very boy who started it. “I'm sorry. That's probably enough. I'll shut up now.” he said bashfully, looking down and scratching the back of his neck.

Hotch saw red briefly before calming down. He can get angry later, right now he was going to deal with why the younger man seemed to care that he was rambling so much. He didn't care before, so why know?

“Why would I want you to shut up?” he asked, slowly making his way to the smaller man when he noticed the slight shaking in his shoulders.

“B-because everyone w-wants m-me to s-shut up and I-I don't want to l-lose the o-only family I have l-left” the brunette answered through his choked sobs,

Hotch enveloped the prodigy in his arms, not allowing him to escape. The younger made a small sound of surprise before collapsing into the man, shaking as he continued to son in the man's arms.

When he looked up he realised he had an audience that consisted of a group of oddly guilty-looking BAU members.

Suddenly, something clicked but he needed to make sure.

“Who's everyone, Spence?” he asked gently, contrasting the harsh glare he sent everyone else. A ripple of satisfaction went through him when they all looked away in shame.

“D-Derek, G-garcia, Emily and JJ and R-rossi.” he answered shamefully, burying himself deeper in the man's arms, almost as if he was trying to make sure the older man wouldn't see him in such a weak state and judge him harshly. So that he wouldn't see the look of disappointment.

Hotch felt his heartbreak as the young man in his arms continued to cry. Eventually, those sobs died down and only light breathing could be heard. He must have cried himself to sleep.

Making a split-second decision he quickly gathered the man in his arms before picking him up and laying him down on the couch. He took a blanket that was lying there and draped it over the peacefully sleeping form.

He then turned around to the people who caused this mess.

“Do you guys have anything you want to say or do you want me to make an assumption?” he asked sarcastically, shooting them all a furious look.

“Look, Hotch we didn't kn-”

“Shut up, Derek,” he replied and took little satisfaction when the man in front of him flinched away.

“I don't really care how stressed you guys were, what happened that day, what you ate. But none of that makes it alright to tell the person who was told to shut up for most of their life and mistreated for most of his life to shut up.” he hissed, mindful of the sleeping agent in the room.

When none of them disagreed with him he continued.

“Know, here's what you guys are going to do. You will all listen attentively to whatever he has to say, clear? You all have to do as he says, clear? And if I don't hear him ramble and the only cause is because he's tired I will personally assign all of you to convenience store robberies. Clear?” and he knew that would get them to agree if Spencer’s crying face wasn't.

Nothing is more humiliating than being assigned convenience store robbery cases. They all nodded their heads quickly, not wanting to anger the other man any more than they had.

“Good. Now go. I doubt Spence wants you guys to be the first faces he sees when he wakes up.” and they all scuttered away, like mice.

‘Rats would be more fitting.’ mused Aaron as he turned to the man he'd grown to see as a son.

“Get some rest, k Spence. You're going to need it. After all, tomorrow you're going to have to deal with a bunch of sorry ass' ' and he placed a small kiss on the boy's forehead before making his way out and closing the light and door after him.

Spencer would be okay. And if he wasn't you would have to deal with one Aaron Hotchner.

#spencer reid #derek morgan #Penelope garcia #Jj #emily prentiss #Rossi #aaron hotchner #Rambling #Awkwardness #angst with a hopeful ending #Angst #Hurt/comfort #Dad Aaron hotcher #Guilty BAU #Bau

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kyledumb · 7 years

Text

TW: depression update

Today was such a weird day my brain has no idea what happened today… (smh at my anxiety shutting things out and my brains inability to remember things short term without being reminded).

I remember that I had my second (this time in person interview which I had 44 minutes to fully prepare for but I think based on my first and second interviews I’m fitting in into their decision process. I have one more interview tomorrow over the phone but based on how expedited the process has been and my background I feel like I have a good chance at nailing this position which will help me excel in my intended career path of working with animals, I would get to take a UC Davis (cmon top school for vet med) course on microbiology and food interactions and dietary needs within the animal kingdom.

Tomorrow I have the last interview in this process and hopefully I will come out of this championing my dedication to animal welfare!

After the first interview today my mom and I drove over to my grandparents and it was nice to see them in person again. They hear a lot about my struggles and how I haven’t had the easiest time being out on my own so it’s nice to know that they know and that they worry because it’s nice to feel genuine concern from people you’ve always wanted love from but due to family issues and my own personal walls I’ve built to keep the hurt from the past away it’s been hard to re-establish these relationships without the fear of everything coming back i just need to allow myself to accepts this love as a genuine care and have my family be my cheerleaders like I’ve always dreamed.

Moving on with me day we came back to my parents home and I basically came out fully to my parents that I smoke weed to help with my depression and they were shook because growing up with that kind of substance"abuse" and seeing what it did to my family turned me off, of it completely.

But I’ve discovered weed on my own as those wounds from my childhood healed and its allowed me to keep me grounded and it allowed me to release a lot of stress and with friends it’s a nice way to bond and laugh until you’re weak.

But with my family today we smoked (a lot for me we did buckets and I usually do joints or a bong) with them and it was nice, it allowed me to further break down that wall I’ve built from being to hurt about what happened while I was living with them before I moved out.

my moms health is better, she tells me stories about her drinking which breaks my heart but i feel like if I could just allow myself to fully heal from those wounds and open up to them I can hopefully rekindle some sort of a relationship and help her out with her depression because I imagine she feels the same way that I feel most days… isolated from what should be your main support system. We haven’t had family caring vibes for so long but maybe this is the time to help pull us both out of that depression by helping each other. I just need to keep my guard down and allow the relationships to build naturally so she can get to know who I am now and vice versa.

have been always been private and reclusive with my family, they genuinely don’t know who I am today, they see bits and pieces of my personality but they really do not know me but through the more harrowing times I’ve been through I’ve found avenues in which I am able to reconnect slowly interaction by interaction, so hopefully if I put in more work and let the fear of getting too close and and I have opportunities on the horizon, I have some good support systems I just need he courage to push past my anxiety and depression to truly take advantage of the people who do care about me instead of just bottling in everything and sleeping all day. But I had a nap midday after getting really stoned and woke up in a daze, you know when you wake up with severe anxiety and you don’t know why it’s there… so I fought through it. I’m going to try to do more for myself to make my life more fulfilling… I’m going to really push myself these next few days to go out and just do things I wouldn’t so my anxiety and depression will be shook like “how he do that?” “He’s doing things alone on his own taking control of his happiness… as if”

I’m medium high on benzos right now (considering a prescription of this continues) but they allow me to really departmentalized my brain so I can understand what’s missing and what I can do to help cope I want to start living like I used to. I find that where I live now it’s really heard to appreciate the good things in life especially when all your mental illness is telling to you do is lie in bed, constantly check you social media and feel defeated and lost again once you run out of the new meme content. I really need to stop just scooting by sadly and do what I can to restructure my days so they’re more fulfilling. I’m going to take a full dose tomorrow to see if these feelings of freedom and the inspiration to go out and live life is continued during daylight when I have stuff to to like take care of myself. It’s time to stop wallowing and get back to kicking butt and taking names. I am smart and have done a lot for myself despite my less than ideal upbringing and regardless of pace I know I’ll get to where I wanna be emotionally and financially. I have a good opportunity tomorrow and am hoping this isn’t just a one night thing where I feel like I’m making progress but I wake up feeling the same. I want to buy a calendar to help structure my life because being a free man who can do whatever he wants whenever (aka lying in bed watching big brother) I can take this possible downtime to turn my life around and be the person I want to be like the only person who is stopping me is me. There are days where I feel I can’t leave the house if I don’t have someone to go with because of my insecurities, I never feel like I belong as a single identity I feel like a lot of how I contribute to society is often through other people but I want to be that beacon of creativity. I want to reach out to people in the past. I want to rebuild old relationships, I want to learn from these people and find passions and things that fulfill my time on earth.

I’m making a calendar so I can organize and hold myself accountable.

Idk if any of this makes sense I’m high and going to bed. If you guys made it this far… let me know what’s helped you when you feel alone and depressed and like you’re just waiting for things to get better instead of proactively putting yourself out there. What do you do? Tips appreciated. I’m working on slowly becoming a better more happy fulfilled me and not completely devoid of emotion, self worth and meaningfulness. Someone help me stay accountable.

I might either buy a diary or make a diary blog we will see. Goodnight. Send me messages if you need advice or anything I'm here.

#so long sorry!

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