#how am i still on this website | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

arbor-wilds · 5 months

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My humor has peaked

#neopets #neopets 2023 #how am i still on this website #pteri #baby pteri #bad jokes #so help me

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n0ahsferatu · 3 months

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pov you are a locked chest or perhaps someone bleeding to death

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the-real-list-of-ominous-threats · 3 months

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Today and every day going forth, you WILL be nice to trans women, or else every threat on this blog comes true for you.

#TRANS WOMEN ARE COOL #I LOVE TRANS WOMEN #YEAH #trans men too but it's trans women who have been targeted recently so i am emphasizing them #(if you're going to say that i must not mean it because i'm still on this website. I never give them money and i use an adblocker.)#tumblr has the worst ceo it's ever had and hot damn that's saying something considering how tumblr management has been in the past

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ministarfruit · 2 months

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straya outfit swap

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dopscratch · 9 months

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i'm sorry, isaac, but it was inevitable

edit: hold on it's gunner wright's b-day today! happy birthday to the man who brought my favorite traumatized engineer to life

#he is so marketable #this was gonna be a low-effort silly doodle how did this happen #the power of my dead space obsession i guess #also i am slowly trying to acclimate myself to isaacs new design #i color picked from his portrait on the website lol #still love old isaac though #dead space #isaac clarke #dead space art #trashmann treasure

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cupid-circus · 4 months

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Your boy finished the drawing for the gary mousepad!!!!!

I will show it properly soon, and hopefully get the actual mousepads soon

#venture bros #henchman 21 #ball pit trinkets #gary mousepad #small business #so i didnt know how to do cmyk #and the website for my supplier asks for it specifically and i wasnt abt to spend A Lot a Money for CMYK Russian Roulette #and i already took such a long time to do the og one and i highkey got uh #got pretty down abt having to redo all the values l #but its doooone #and im so happyyy abt it #will show tomorrow ✌️#the conversion was for the better and anyone still here and still interested i am incredibly grateful for

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icewindandboringhorror · 4 months

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reminders of the passage of time moodeboard

#my blog is in his last year of middle school. he'll be off to high school next year (at least I think so..? 13 yrs old is usually 8th grade #at least from my experience. 9th graders are usually 14. 10th are 15. etc. etc. and then you're in 12th grade #and graduate high school usually 17yrs old.) ANYWAY.. wow he is so ancient..#maybe he's still in a preteeny early teen emo phase or something.. I hope he gets some black and white striped armwarmers and black eyeline #r for his birthday. Maybe an MP3 player of course. Though because I don't really like most alternative music and he is my son he's actually #not allowed to listen to metal or pop punk or emo rock whatever stuff. I open the mp3 player and pre-stock it with only #disco and funk and classical music. he can have a little chiptune or techno stuff as a treat (sometimes emo adjacent maybe more #scene. I think a lot of scene kids were into that more.. emo's weird eccentric brother))#Also he starts taking iron pills his 13th birthday because he's probably incredibly anemic just like me #so on and so forth and et cetera (I'm just being silly.. I am not pro-controlling your children down to whatmusic they #listen to or etc.etc. lol)#THOUGH I love that it's in january... january is one of my favorite months if not my favorite. yeeaaay #just such a nice cool month. I like that it's the start of the year mostly and that it's sometimes snowy here. Like where I live nov - dec #isnt really actually snowy?? You always associate those winter Months with snow but I think snow happens later on this coast #so it's more like Jan - March or even april sometimes. Though that may just be climate change lol.. But it's cool that Jan is winter AND #ACTUALLY snowy. plus the Beginning Of Year vibes and energy.. hrm... nice nice.. ANYWAY #AND this is not even my first tumblr blog. I had a different one before it I think..#evviilll to be on one website for so long lol.. Very thankful that most websites I used to use as a 10 year old or whatever #are now defunct. There's something weird about how humans are just creating endless streams of words and pictures and all of this stuff #and it just goes out into the void and stays there long after the person themselves has forgotten it. not even like 'oh no what if i said #something bad!!' but more just the general sense of.. people create so much more ideas than they can actually hold in their heads. nobody #remembers exactly word for word every post they've ever made or etc. It's like parts of yourself that you've externalized and then fade awa #from you but they're still you but they're not so you just have little snapshots of yourself in time floating around entirely unbenknownst #to you. like making clones of yourself and then forgetting you did so but every once in a while going 'shit... there's clones out there..#of me and I don't even have track or awareness of them anymore.. what an odd concept..' etc. not EXACTLY like that ghbj..you know what I me #n.. or maybe you dont.. hrmm... ANYWAY #I am just now slightly recovering from my most recent mysterious illness spell and etc. so I would like to post more again and mAYBE even #do a costume if I'm being ambitious.. but after so many times of being randomly stricken by problems I'm now fearful of ever being too #hopeful lol.. always like 'I would like to go to the grocery store tomorrow! .... MAYBE.. if i CAN.. possibly... NOT getting my hopes up'.#etc. etc. etc. every statement has a caveat and a backup plan and so on and so forth and such is life.. anyway. happy birthday evil tumblr

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wispybunbun · 4 months

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🍰 ⸝⸝ ꒰ Carrd Design #1 // Client: Uxsakki ꒱

A soft, very lightly Y2K inspired Carrd that feels like a little flower meadow! (..◜ᴗ◝..) I am a little bun bun who makes Carrds if you would like one please check out my VGen: https://vgen.co/WispyBun (ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)ꕤ.ﾟ

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s0ckspuppet · 10 months

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I have been obsessed (an understatement) with Avenue Q for several years now, sooo, I have finally decided to crawl out of my corner and actually post something, so hi! Here's some silly shitposty/quick stuff from the past week or so :-]]]

#avenue q #rod avenue q #nicky avenue q #I am so scared to post for the first time hjgkdshj #I'm going to make more posts hopefully I just wanted to solidify my existence on here #I have no idea how this website works still

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apostaterevolutionary · 7 months

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Ngl I get super annoyed if someone makes a post unrebloggable not because it got horribly misinterpreted or because it was a personal thing that wasn’t supposed to spread or because it got hateful assholes on it, but solely because it got popular, especially if it’s still under 10k notes. Unreadable notifications is the price you pay for fame. A good portion of us have gone through it, have had a post randomly get 50k or 100k and suffered the consequences. It’s just the tumblr ecosystem. By making it unrebloggable, you have interfered with the natural balance of the tumblring and tbh you are a coward. Accept the price of fame like the rest of us or just delete the original post as god (or rather david karp) intended

#just feels like ruining the fun you know #if everyone on this website did that think of how many famous and iconic posts would be out of circulation forever #usually block these people because you are weak and will not survive the winter lmao #idk it just bugs me like. ohhhh nooo you got scared of notifications ooog #just fucking delete the original post like god intended and let everyone else have fun #is this like a completely minor thing not worth being annoyed about #yes absolutely lmao #am I (a person who has had a post breach 100k notes and just dealt with it) still annoyed #also yes lmao #text #misc #shut up nerd

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puppyeared · 9 months

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man ok so you know the spiciness scale on menus that show you how spicy a dish is so you can order based on your tolerance. can we have that for sauces too please

#im being serious btw. the sauce to rice ratio is very important and sacred to me #whenever i eat at home i get to choose how much sauce i can have with my rice because i dont like absolutely dousing it but i still wanna b #able to taste it yanno. i dont do well with slippery/saucy foods and ive given up trying to understand it. it might be a sensory thing #i am so sorry to admit this on the soup website but i cant handle thick/chunky sauces or curry. forgive me #the worst part is that i actually can handle and even enjoy some like caldereta and congee. but its so hard to tell people ill eat this but #not that.. its embarassing because it feels like im making exceptions. which i am!! because its preference!! but alas #but anyway with the sauce scale. i was thinking it would be nice to include a scale for how much sauce you want with a dish #rather than just skirting away from a food because you feel like you cant handle the texture or feel unsure about it #sauce could be adjustable without completely changing the recipe so it would be more like a matter of quantity or serving size #also i feel like i can make cool names for the scale. like “light drizzle” to “sauceageddon”#im asian so when i eat sauce i pair it with rice and it works because the rice kind of cancels out or makes the sauce more tolerable for me #with caldereta i make it an even 50/50 because i can taste it in the rice without the texture getting in the way #but with pasta and sauce its normally 1/3 sauce because the pasta normally isnt enough to cancel it out #i also grew up with relatives making fun of my eating habits and i really really hate eating at restaurants and gatherings because of it #maybe its because they want to make sure im eating right but!! you dont have to call me out for my 1/3 portion of spaghetti sauce!! damn!!!#anyway im not sure if anyone feels the same abt this and maybe its just me. but it would be really nice to have this a normal thing #without judging ppl for their eating habits and preferences. on god #yapping #food ment #EDIT: ASKING FOR SAUCE ON THE SIDE. MY EYES HAVE BEEN OPENED. I DIDNT KNOW THAT WAS A THING

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ryllen · 1 year

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my daughter has no personality other than being timid & poor from the start i kinda want her to pair her with someone manipulative that she trusted only because they are an octoling

#but then my daughter will probably never smile and will always be miserable #i actually kinda eyed on my friend's oc for that reason but i guess that kind of thing would be too much to drag someone else to #not that i am great at writing evil i still want to keep my daughter safe #splatoon #splatoon 3 #splatoon oc #octoling #octoling oc #fanart #i wanted to name him another language for satan or devil #but i like the part where u r named contradicting to what u are #like exactly my friend's oc that's named something bright and yellow but his aura is totally dark #https://www.collinsdictionary.com/dictionary/english-french/angel #the pronunciation of anđeo from that website is so cool #that i decided to pick it #i still think how my daughter is still fidgety around inklings like she can't really trust or understand them #while it's actually the octoling near her that can't be trusted #she is mostly comfortable befriending other species that don't talk much #or just other species really #anđeo is probably a really killer soldier but scrapped because he starts losing parts of his body like eye and leg #and those defects count him as uneffective #and now he lives on with evil & resentment in his heart #anđeo #master jellyfish #slza #oko #octarians

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hmcbook · 1 year

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it's something else seeing videos of myself as a teenager and realize. That I was actually cute and adorable and sweet. And not at all hideous and awful and ugly as I thought at the time.

#like sure I was cringe and awkward but that's just me!! that's how I am baby!!#I used to film these vlogs every now and then. just for me #I was watching them for the first time and. I feel. sorry for baby me:( for thinking I was so awful. bitch u weren't #like I still struggle a LOT with my self esteem dont get me wrong lmao #anyway. I found a video from 2013 where im like. ''so I found this website called tumblr and it's so cool!!'' jfkgkgkgkkgj #in the same video I was like. ''so ive started reading these online stories. okay they're (whispering) fanfiction''JFKFKFUEJASJDJ PLEASE #mine

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consult-sherlockholmes · 8 months

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Looks like your blog is a bit late with the asks. Let me run an experiment:

It's September 18, 8:23am In London. Could you tell me the time when you answer?

Oh you can't even imagine how late this blog is with the asks, I have over 3000 still unanswered, some since years.

Why should I tell you the time, when every post has a time stamp of when it was posted, thus also answered asks. Or are you incapable of pressing those 3 little dots up there? There you go, the time. Very useful for deducing blogs. Experiment concluded.

#And second of all how am i supposed to answer an ask immediately when i am still asleep? I literally just woke up #I dont have notifications on that wake me up because this website is far not important enough to disturb my slumber #However if Lestrade calls for a case that has a ringtone that the whole room shakes so it wakes me up #Rp #sherlock roleplay #sherlock rp #roleplay

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ki11j0y11 · 8 months

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"phantom limb pain" Phantom limb pain is the perception of pain or discomfort in a limb that is no longer there.

#my art #good omens #good omens fan art #crowley good omens #anthony j crowley #crowley #i am so sorry #I HAD TO DRAW HIM </3 #uhm I still don't know how to work this website but I'm trying my best #ALSO I AM BACK..?#KILLJ0Y #lordhavemercyilovethis #SATANHAVEMERCY!!!#ineffable divorce #good omens angst #</3 #fanart #yippeee!!!

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kirkwallguy · 23 days

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can i get your mary having Realizations. maybe at the day of her wedding?

omg TY for this prompt i love talking about mary but very rarely actually write about her. this stumped me for a little while because everything that happens at her wedding requires SOO much context that i had no idea how to start, and it felt ooc to just have cullen suddenly do something so terrible. so here's him and mary just kind of sucking in unique and strange ways. this takes place juust before the wedding when everyone is beginning to gather at the winter palace.

mild tw for vomit mention and templar ptsd-esque nightmares (???).

Mary awoke in Cullen's arms. Their bed at the Winter Palace was bigger and softer than any she'd ever slept in - she and Cullen gravitated towards the middle of the feather mattress together, leaving a large indent that would inevitably linger after they crawled out of it in the morning, waiting for their return later that evening.

Cullen never looked more like a Templar than when he was sleeping. It was strange - Mary had heard (and, she was ashamed to admit, read in Varric's romance novels) that people were supposed to look innocent in sleep. Haunted heroes became innocent boys, creased foreheads smoothed, racing thoughts slowed.

But Cullen's brow remained creased as he dreamed. He muttered to himself, kicked, scratched, growled like a dog. Sometimes, he frightened Mary. She'd cling to him in the dark, heart pounding, as he whispered cruel words at some imagined threat that taunted him behind his eyelids.

Were all Templars like this? Were there thousands of people all across Thedas just like her? People who lay awake with their palms flat against their lovers' sweaty backs, thanking the Maker that they weren't born a mage? Was she just unlucky? Or was this, as Hawke had darkly insinuated that final time they'd spoken, exactly what she deserved?

According to Varric's stories, Mary had a duty here. She was Cullen's reward at the end of a difficult road, a symbol of all he had lost and gained. She was supposed to comfort him, to soothe and fix his troubled soul - her arms designed to wrap around him like bandages, her kiss the perfect antivenom.

But on nights like this, when she pressed her lips to his twitching cheek, the taste of stale sweat always made her draw back with disgust.

One night early in their relationship, Cullen had drunk far too much and vomited all down himself. Shuddering and crying, he'd reached out for comfort. The smell of his breath, beer and vomit mingling together, had made Mary turn and run, leaving him alone on the floor in his own filth. The next morning, he'd kissed her chastely on the cheek at breakfast and his breath had smelled of peppermint.

It was easy to resent him for drinking like that. Many women resented their men for drink.

"Drink doesn't make men into beasts," her mother had whispered to her one night before bed, not loud enough to cover her father's heavy snores in the next room, "it just tells us which ones have beasts hiding inside them."

After that, she'd spent years of her childhood trying to see who did and didn't have a beast inside of them. She wasn't sure about her father - if he was a beast, he was nothing but an old bear, loud but too tired and lazy to do any harm. A few of the Chantry Mothers, the ones who would rap her on the knuckles when she giggled during the Chant, seemed to have dragons inside of them. The men who fought outside the taverns late at night were wolves, howling at the moon with their hackles up. And the girl in the portrait that hung above the fireplace in Mary's bedroom stared at her with the eyes of a songbird.

Cullen had something inside of him as well, but Mary wasn't sure if it was a beast. A beast, after all, could be killed.

As his dreams became more violent, so did his body. He writhed in her arms, as if a demon was taking over him. Mary held him tighter.

"She'll regret it," he muttered, "she'll be sorry soon."

Mary shuddered. Trying to distract herself, she traced the muscles in his back with a morbid fascination, feeling as they shifted and bulged unnaturally. If she'd been a healer, she might have understood how muscles worked - the violent snap and pull of them beneath her fingers might have been cause for gentle concern rather than a sensation that revolted her. But the inner workings of the human body were as good as witchcraft.

Cullen groaned, "kill it," he said, so loud that Mary squeezed her eyes shut and prayed that nobody else could hear, "kill it now!"

Whatever he was dreaming of terrified him. He cried out and twitched, kicking Mary hard enough in the shin that she yelped and pushed him away roughly enough to wake him up.

Cullen's eyes flew open. He stared directly at Mary, panting.

"Oh, thank the Maker," he whispered.

Mary stared back at him, keeping her eyes half closed as if she'd just woken up, "hmm?"

He looked like was going to cry. To Mary's horror, his trembling lips embarrassed her; she edged away from him a little, hoping he wouldn't notice.

"I was dreaming," Cullen said, "it was just a dream. A terrible dream."

Mary didn't respond. This was exactly how this scene played out in every single one of Varric's stories. She swallowed her disgust and reached out to brush Cullen's hair from his sweaty forehead, almost gagging as her fingers met his wet skin.

"Just a nightmare." She agreed, hoping Cullen didn't notice how flat her voice was.

Cullen, Maker help him, closed his eyes at Mary's touch. He lay there and shook as she stroked his hair, tense shoulders beginning to relax. That innocence he lacked in sleep was plain on his face now - he looked like someone Mary had never met before, someone she wasn't sure she would ever meet again.

"What was the dream about?" She tried.

Opening his eyes, Cullen stared at her for a long moment. His gaze passed over her face, lingering on each detail for so long that she almost found herself blushing.

Only when Mary was sure that he'd forgotten she'd asked him a question did he answer her:

"You." He said.

It should have been a shock, should have made her blood freeze, but in that moment his answer seemed like the most logical thing in the world.

Mary continued to stroke his hair, "what happened to me?"

"You were possessed," Cullen closed his eyes again, sleepy, "an abomination."

"Did you kill me?"

He was halfway back asleep now. He leaned in closer and wrapped an arm around Mary's waist, "I did," he whispered, "I killed it."

And then he stuck his face into Mary's neck, his hair brushing her collarbone, and fell straight back asleep.

Mary didn't sleep again. She stayed awake, palms against Cullen's sweaty back, and thanked the Maker that she wasn't born a mage until the sun was high in the sky.

#iceta #ask #oh mary.... i mean this is on cullen too but i think she's disgusted by vulnerability beyond the templar stuff #i ALMOST just said fuck it and started planning a 10k thing about her wedding day but it STILL didnt do the context justice #maybe one day ill do something about the trevelyan siblings. idk how though. i like the idea of a bunch of concurrent short stories #anyway i hope you find this a fun insight into mary's twisted mind sorry it took like 2 weeks and is short #also a little purple prose-y. but when its under 1k it doesnt count ok i just wanted flowery mary being terrible..#also aware i am on the piss on the poor website and anyone can see this... this is just mary's pov i dont think addiction #or violent nightmares make you a bad person. its just terrible circumstances.#fanfic

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