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that-one-weeb-but-it-transformer · 2 years

Text

Optimus with an artist human s/o

I must do the drawing is your always mood

But with art block half the time your chucking your shit out the window

He was there to actually pick up Jack, because Arcee was out on a mission with bulkhead you skipped class so you sat there sketching him, bee, and wheeljack

Couldn't get the grill right so you oh so casually went up and rubbed your hand against it

"Oh...so in....that looks right..."

Taking pictures for reference

"Can I help you-" "oh shit-"

It was just jack

"Sorry was taking refrence photos. Is this your truck?" "Uh...yeah..." "Can I get and interior shot?" "Maybe another day?"

Ayo Optimus not noisy but he kinda wanted to see them drawings

Turns out Arcee was out longer than expected and the next day you were there again and so was he because Jack was so nice and let you take some refrence photos of the outside you slipped a drawing through the open window with a thank you note and went about you way.

Hah. Not Knockout and breakdown thinking your an ally to the autobots and basically snatching you like they snatchin someones weave

"Ayo can I draw you-" "Bitch im litterally kidnapping you" "....okay so can I take some ref picks atleast? Please?" "...well shit you said please"

Not you having fun being kidnapped

"Damn I look good. Whats your name human?" "Y/n" "and why is such a fabulous artist with the autobots?" "The who?"

Oh. You- oh...oh shit.....

Not knockout dropping you off at your house and grtting your # ya'll buddies now

You despite being kidnapped for two days just show up again randomly and walk up to Jack.

"Yeah can I see the inside your truck no pictures no anything, just. Real quick?" "Sure?"

Oh shit your sitting in a transformer.

"Okay I know about your talking alien car that transformers into a huge robot"

Bam friends now now you go to the base everyday

Ratchet wasnt very Happy till he realized you were just extremely quiet. And YES he could work in peace

Often you sketch the autobots forms.

"Wow! Thats real detailed!" "Holy shit miko-"

You often let her go through your sketch book.

"This is a lot of-" "Shhhhh"

It was alot of Optimus: you dont know why to be honest it was like he your comfort person to draw

You've probably had every expression of his in your books, sketches of...well everything.

Mhmm those hip sketches somethin else dude

"I made my first art based Tarot card deck!"

Smokescreen realizes there based off them and is obsessed with his tarot card desgin (the sun card because come on its Smokescreen)

Optimus even compliments you on them and ask you about them you happily explain them to him

You tell him you based him in the Justice card and told him it was pretty explaintory

He told you he was honored that you seen him such a light, and there you go getting all flustered and complimenting him back

Arcee wants to know why shes the hanged man but your too busy being flustered

Now often he'll wander up behind you looking over your shoulder why you sketch away.

"What are you drawing today y/n-" "Ah! nothing! Nothing at all! Hah! Ha...."

Not more optimus hip images: they're just too fine not to draw

Despite being well Optimus he's very innocent and would simply see them as anatomy drawings

But they aint....you know that

For that reason: you refused to draw Optimus (or his hips) anymore and now your crying inside but tiding to have will power

HOT ANIME GUY POWER; drawing hot anime guys to leed your mind occupied but you just make Human Prime and your crying and screaming without the s.

Miko, knows because you forgot your bag at her house one time

"Damn man you got it bad." "I know..."

Luckily ratchet sees Vaule in your skills and ask you to draw out invention plans you say yes immediately

With Ratchet asking for help your around the base more often, sketching out plans for him

Which means you and Optimus talk alot more

He finds your conversations relaxing

You often fall asleep at the small table, after finishing plans and starting on your own work, usually homework

So that means he sees your litrle fifth grade crush drawings, you know with lopsided hearts and all luckily you know better to draw Human like alien robots in your notebook so he only sees the O + F/i surronded in hearts

He doesnt know why but now he's gotta talk to you more: its a now or never situation.

"Y/n-" "It wasnt me!-" "would you like to go home to rest?" "Um. Yeah that sounds great"

Optimus now drives you home everyday, and picks you up from school instead of you just riding with Bee and Raff

Litterally a dream come true on your part and on his part

Is it akward silence? Or do you both just think its awkward silence making it more awkward

Asking Ratchet to describe how the iacon archives use to look and sketching it out and giving it to Optimus

"Im not sure I got the file cases right. I had Ratchet describe the your world to me as best I could.

It was perfect to him, and he thanked you for it, it never leaves his glove box

Usually because your an artist your dressed in clothes that have paint stains, perhaps the back of your shirt is hand painted or your old converse.

Yet you had a presentantion you had to get dressed up for, for school, in a knitted pencil like skirt and a knitted sweater with some boots

He couldnt pick you up or drive you to school that day so Wheeljack went with you instead and Smokescreen picked you up

Not wheeljack bragging trying to get Optimus to confess that you look rather hot that day.

Turns out when Optimus returned to base he'd be blown away by your change in outfit.

"How'd it go!"

"All the energon secured. There was no doubt after all!" Wheeljack laughed, "Right Optimus."

You looked at him with such a big smile and eyes he only nodded with a smile

Wheeljack drove you home: saying the boss was tired and just like he had hoped you left your bag in his back seat

Now Miko and Wheeljack both have the power to tease you

Not Optimus seeing where you work and creating a holo form to go and see you

"Hm? Y/n?" The employee asked, "Yeah shes in right now there doing a study. Come on I'll take you there."

When he said study he thought idk maybe like with a book. Not figure studies, you know the ones where your naked

So he was not expecting to walk in with people surrounding you as you sat laid on a couch with a thin sheet covering your lower hips down, top bare and a hand propping your head up.

Poor baby had to stand there for twenty mintues attempting not to stare at you

But time was called and you got up going to dress again.

"Ayo n/n." "Hm?" "This guys here for you."

You only smiled hoping it was an art scout as you apologized for your current state and fixed yourself.

"Hello Im Y/n!" "I...I know..."

Voice sounded oddly familiar

"Do...I know you from....Wait a mintue!"

Pretty easy to figure it out, "stay there!"

He only listened as you rushed to your bag, flipping through the pages of one of your sketch books and lifted it up besides him.

"Its...Op-"

"I believe Orion- would be a better choice sounds more human."

Your weezing; hes evern prettier as a human

"I had no idea...you could..." "its older technology but works well." "Ah... I see..."

Thank god for being 18...primus hes just so pretty

"Um...I have to go pick up my work bag...do you wanna come along?"

Not you guys having a moment in the locker room where you told each other your feelings.

Making out in the locker room super softly? Absolutely.

Making out in his Alt form? Even a bigger yes, especially if hes dropping you off at your house

But its best to keep it a secret

Miko and Wheeljack notices that the teasing doesnt get to Y/n anymore and Miko realizes you stopped drawing Optimus and some human guy now. What a bummer

They realize Optimus does seem to have a much brighter glow to him, and he always lightly smells like something fimilar.

*cough* your perfume *cough*

"Is Y/n okay?" "What would be the problem?" "Shes always in a daze these days."

It true, drawings and plans you offered to help ratchet draw out are completed but sometimes you dont even remember drawing them or the process.

"Hmm? Yeah....I don't really care....whatever you want Miko." "Um Im jack and Im asking for the science text book back." "What!? Oh- sorry!"

"Ah Miko! Isnt the world so bright today!" "Its raining outside Y/n-" "Lets go run in it!" "What-"

You've never been so happy, even around finals your kicking your feet like a schook girl

It causes everyone great fear,

Not Optimus sneaking out of base to help you sneak out of your house so you guys can go have fun in some forest.

Refused to go into your room, its your private space but you convinced him anyways and well...its chaotic organization.

You show him around, pointing out things to him that your super proud of.

Ends in you guys on your bed trying to be quiet as you laugh with each other.

Falling asleep in his arms for the first time is wonderful

Not he leaving a jacket behind for you to wear and you do just around the house it did have the autobot insignia on it after all.

Sleeping prime refrence photos if you wake up before he has to leave

Can dance surprisingly well, and he'll go dancing with you in abanded parking buildings

You couldnt find a more perfect boyfriend

Finds a way to go to every art gallery your in.

You often do peices based on the bots and there stories, like a verbal reference

Some of your paintings worry him: you always reassure him you cant always have a happy peice but your happy to have him

Old people think your both just the sweetest couple

Until your parents pull up and your not a couple anymore, you try and keep it a secret from everyone and ya'll manage

Your parents like him upon introductions that you are both friends

Your dad's actaully a greek philosopher, and gets along very well with Optimus, he did introduce himself as Orion after all.

Life is good for the both of you

#transformers #tfp #tfp headcanons #transformersprime #tfp optimus prime #tfp fanfic #tfp fic #transfomers prime #transformers prime Optimus #optimus headcannons #optimus x reader

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maymyheartbmyguidingkey · 3 years

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aren’t we a nice pear

you can blame @duelistkingdom for this, not me

Yugi was quickly learning that certain fruits may have been tough to come by during the 18th dynasty - if not non-existent.

His first clue was when he brought a coconut back to the apartment, intending to make his famous coconut curry and sticky rice.

Atem had peeked into his grocery bags, adorably curious (Sugoroku had always done the grocery shopping, and rarely did he ever obtain fresh fruits), and had gasped dramatically, startling Yugi so badly he nearly jumped out of his own skin.

"What? What's wrong? I swear to god, if I broke the eggs -"

But when Yugi swivelled to survey the damage, he found instead Atem holding a coconut aloft, reverently.

His shoulders fell.

"A coconut," Atem hissed. "When father would return from his diplomatic travels he would near always bring coconuts. The juice was divine."

Yugi rolled his eyes good-naturedly and returned to putting away their groceries. "You almost gave me a heart attack over a coconut. What, were they not very popular in your time?"

Atem was silent for long enough that Yugi knew: if he looked back at him right now, he'd be met with an unfairly incredulous stare.

So Yugi turned to him, face resolutely deadpan, finding his prediction entirely correct.

"Yugi, my partner, light of my life -"

Yugi's eyebrows climbed into his hairline.

"- coconuts were an import," Atem said, like it was especially important, clutching the coconut to his chest as if it were a wounded animal. "Only the fabulously wealthy -" he pantomimed tossing hair over his shoulder, "could possibly afford such a luxury good."

Yugi snorted, finding the eggs (thankfully, in good shape) and placing them delicately in their designated spot in the fridge.

"Well you were fabulously wealthy, O dearest Pharaoh, so why are you clinging to it like a starving man?"

"Because coconuts are - what is it Jou always says? It is the most ridiculous - oh yes - lit."

Yugi froze, eyes squeezed shut. "Atem. My world. Dearest heart. Never say that again."

But then his brain buffered. Wait a damn minute -

Eyes comically wide, Yugi said, "Wait. Atem. What kind of fruit did you have?"

Atem pursed his lips, tossing the coconut from hand to hand, resting his elbows on the quartz island between them. "Grapes. I rather liked those. Oh - figs, though I found them too sweet. Nabk -"

“Atem,” Yugi pressed, suddenly desperate, “what’s a strawberry?”

Atem blinked, confused as to how and why the tone of their conversation shifted. “I... suppose I'm not quite sure? When you say the word, an image crops up, but I have not the faintest -”

Yugi was already grabbing his keys. “I'm going back to the store.”

“What on Earth -”

“I’ve been craving cherries anyway. Oh my god, and pomegran - no, wait, you guys had those, right? Pretty sure that was an 8th dynasty thing. Peaches! Pineapple? Holy - I need to learn how to slice a pineapple -”

“Yugi, my love, what is happening right now?”

“Oh, I’m so stupid,” Yugi scoffed, taking Atem by the hand, who squawked indignantly at his self-insult. He dragged Atem hurriedly to the front door, fumbling to slip on his shoes with only one hand. “You can just come with me.”

“Call yourself stupid one more time. I have hands now, Yugi. I can smack you.”

“Why, what better for me to kiss, my dear?” Yugi said, throwing his pharaoh a sly smirk, raising Atem’s knuckles to his lips. Atem’s face flushed a pretty red, and he stared pointedly down at his own backless loafers, grumpily slipping them on.

“Cheeky,” he mumbled, sounding secretly pleased.

☆

“Yugi. Where... what is this place?”

Yugi sent him a bright grin, squeezing Atem's hand where he held it in his jacket pocket. “This, O mighty Pharaoh, is the grocery store.”

Atem gawked at the various signage as Yugi dragged him to the cart well, snatching up a handbasket and promptly making a beeline for the produce section.

“Wait, wait, was that - was that a massive cart to wheel your groceries about in?” Atem asked, incredulous. “How affluent must you be to fill one of those?”

Yugi snorted. “I can't believe I never once brought you to a grocery store. Goes to show how often those lunches from 7/11 saved my life in high school.”

“Oh,” Atem said, staring at the wall of colorful greeting cards as they passed. “Well, this is delightful. It's much like the market, just. Indoors. And with fluorescent lighting.”

“Yeah, you get it,” Yugi encouraged, leaning over to kiss Atem’s temple firmly. “C'mon, this way.”

The produce section was lush today, what with it being a random Thursday afternoon, and Atem was already spotting things he had never seen before but knew the names of (thanks to the brain of a certain now-adult who he had often possessed when he was nothing but a no-name disembodied spirit).

“There! The - what was the word? - strawberries,” he chirped. “What kind of name is that, by the way?”

Yugi squeezed his hand twice, their mutual sign for it’s okay, grab it, holding the basket within Atem’s reach. “Says the guy with nabk. Throw ‘em in there, hot stuff.”

“The -” Atem blanched, holding up a packet of strawberries, confused. “All of them?”

Yugi raised his eyebrows. “Yes? What, you want me to open it and pluck out a single strawberry?”

“Well - wouldn’t - isn’t the whole thing expensive? They seem like they would be expensive.”

“Oh, no,” Yugi slid the basket to the crook of his elbow, swiping up a packet himself and giving the label a read. “Strawberries are one of Japan's biggest exports. Oooh, and I love amaou variety. Perfect for your first try.”

He gently took the packet from a stunned Atem’s hand and dropped both into the basket. Atem sputtered.

“That is - you can just, buy fruit en masse? Affordably?”

Yugi laughed quietly, spotting the pineapples and leading Atem toward them. “Maybe not as cheaply as in other places - we kind of have a thing for designer fruit here. But these packs are only ¥500 each.”

“Only how mu - oh my land, those are horrifying.”

“Yeah, if you’re not used to them, they’re pretty freaky,” Yugi acquiesced, reaching for a piece of the spiky fruit - only for Atem to slap his hand away.

Yugi whipped around to stare at him, bewildered. The look on Atem’s face wouldn’t be out of place beside the dictionary definition of appalled.

“My Yugi will most certainly not be touching the pointy death fruit!” he hissed, gesturing violently toward the pineapples, like his reaction was obvious. “I used to inhabit that body, you know.”

Yugi pressed his lips into a firm line, trying desperately not to burst into laughter.

“Atem. Pharaoh of my heart. My angel,” he whispered, taking a deep breath. “I love you so much. Just - watch this.”

And Yugi - while giving Atem a pointed, amused look - reached again for a pineapple, easily picking one from its perch by its uninviting body.

Atem, perplexed, brows raised in astonishment, stammered. “But - it - you -”

Yugi offered it to him. “It's not a cactus. Its bark is worse than its bite.”

Atem hesitated, but Yugi patiently held the pineapple toward him, nodding encouragingly when Atem met his eyes doubtfully.

And so Atem took it in his elegant, princely hands, brows furrowed in confusion when it did not, in fact, slice him to ribbons.

“But... it looks so evil.”

“Right? But it’s only poke-y. Honestly I just wanna meet the guy who saw one for the first time and immediately thought, “hey, I’m gonna crack this shit open and give it a taste”.”

☆

Yugi created a monster.

They had picked out a few more things for Atem to try, including the promised cherries and peaches (Atem giving a smug “now that is more like it” when he saw the peaches priced at two for ¥1990), but also some things that yugi had realized he took completely for granted: blueberries, kiwis - bananas. God, bananas.

Atem had also discovered that coconut water was sold by itself, in convenient single portions, and had happily trotted off to the self-checkout counter with a case of six, an endeared Yugi in tow.

It had been a week since that fateful day.

Atem sat on their cute little cream loveseat, newly-acquired and much-needed reading glasses on his nose and feet propped up on the matching ottoman, his current read in his lap. He held one of Yugi's many reusable water bottles in his hand, half-full with coconut water, blueberries, strawberries and ice floating prettily at the top. His bottle-holding arm was curled protectively around a bowl precariously perched on the arm rest, where he kept his (perfectly sliced) pineapple rings.

"Living in the lap of luxury, I see," Yugi said, plopping down beside Atem and draping himself directly atop the open book. He gazed up at his boyfriend, mischievous. "Lavish attention upon me as you do your precious books and fruits, O great Pharaoh."

Atem rolled his eyes, plucking a ring of pineapple from the bowl and tearing it in half. Yugi opened his mouth expectantly.

"Who said this was for you?" Atem snorted, popping one half in his mouth. "This is the last of it and you are a brat."

Yugi, as per usual, pouted to get his way. Atem, as per usual, was unable to resist said pout, huffing and presenting Yugi with the other half.

"A brat maybe, but loved by you nonetheless," he cheeked as he chewed.

"Exhibit A. Eat with your mouth closed; you are in the presence of royalty," atem said. "And sit properly, for goodness sake - you'll choke, and I refuse to have that on my conscience."

And sit properly Yugi did - mostly. He slung himself over Atem's shoulders, muttering into his neck, "You know, that's the third pineapple you've -"

"Ananas."

Yugi scoffed. Ever since Atem had Googled the Arabic name for the fruit (an adventure in it's own right), he refused to use anything else.

"Yes, ananas, yet somehow I’m the brat here," Yugi continued, "point being: it's the third one you've decimated this week. We just ran out of bananas, and I think that was the last pack of strawberries, too. I'm gonna go broke."

"This is fine. We can subsist off of fruit alone."

Yugi leaned back and stared into Atem's face, who had gone back to reading his book, unfazed. "You can subsist off of fruit alone. I need meat. Protein."

Atem pulled off his glasses and slapped the book shut, giving Yugi the most skeptical look he’d ever seen. "Yugi. You are a waif."

"Hey! No body-shaming here!" Yugi protested, pulling his legs up and into Atem's lap, again smothering the book. "All the more reason for me to have meat in my diet! I won't survive."

"You know, I used that miraculous thing - Google - and it told me that meat is actually quite bad for you. Did you know that humans only evolved to eat it because -"

Yugi groaned, stuffing his face back into the crook of Atem's neck, his next words muffled. "Google made my boyfriend health-conscious and now I can't have bacon. I'm sending corporate a strongly-worded email."

Atem's quiet laughter was like warm sunshine, and Yugi basked in it, the tell tale thunk of his water bottle being set on the side table music to his ears, as Atem could only be freeing his hand for one reason. He began to stroke Yugi's hair, and if Yugi could purr, the sound of it would reverberate through the entire apartment building.

They fell into a comfortable silence, only broken by the soft sounds of their chewing as they polish off the pineapple rings, Atem more than happy to continue feeding Yugi pieces.

"I may joke around," Yugi finally whispered, like they were the only two who existed in the universe, "but you're the best thing that's ever happened to me. I'd sell my kidney to buy you whatever you wanted."

Yugi felt a puff of a laugh against the crown of his head; the press of Atem's lips. "No need to go to such extremities, precious one. You are all I would ever wish for."

#katie writes #me? writing?? yeah i still do that sometimes #prolly never again tho lmao i'm exhausted #ygo!#puzzleshipping #fanfic

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kanene-yaaay-o-retorno · 4 years

Text

Cats, coffee, an old apartment and... oh, yeah, the apocalypse

Kanene’s note:

Gooooood day, my lollipops! It's been a while!

Oh my gosh. It's colddd. I wanna sleep and write. How, my dears? H o w

Weeeeell, anyway! This chapter is a little crazier. Can you blame him, tho? Remy is pretty sleepy here. xDD

Poor, poor writing desk. :''3

Coffee is, like... 90% of Remy's self control xDDD

At least he is absolutely, completely alone and there was no one for him bother, right?!

Or any monster/alien/enemy to be afraid of!

...

...Right?

Warnings, fun facts, random things and stuff:

* That is just a Crack Fanfic with Remy and the Sides. There will be angst and action, but it will be more centered in Crack, fluff and being a big, crazy family.

* This characters do not belongs to me. They all belongs to the amazing Thomas Sanders in his series of Sanders Sides.

* This is the chapter after that one! The next chapter will be posted soon!

* Something around 1500 words. -w-)b.

* Sorry for any spelling, pontuation and grammar mistakes! Any advice is very very welcome!

* There aren’t any ship, but feel free to see them in a Romantic or Platonic Relationship!! ^w^)/

* Remy is pretty sleep here, so this chapter can be a little crazy.

* Tô com preguiça de postar a versão em português brasileiro aaaa! Thankys for reading, my lollipops! Try and have fun with new hobbies, talk with the one that you love, drink water and sleep well! Byeioo!~

[~*~]

Chapter 02 - Your time has arrived

Remy stared at the furniture in the middle of his living room with narrowed, uncovered eyes, since it was night and the Sun wasn’t capable to hurt his chocolate, brown pupil irradiating an almost palpable disapproval as he realized the contrast that such object had in his, now completely clean and reorganized, living room. Not that was its fault, sure, he observed while his upper lip twisted into a thoughtful, unpleased feature; the writing desk clearly had already seen better days. Days when its drawers were complete with all its handles, and scratches didn’t adorned the entirety of its length after surviving several moving. Or even a glorious past where its paint was impeccable and free of flaws, as a sneak that can’t decide with color better matches with their scales, therefore they just throw a variety of paint cans on the floor and slide into it in somersaults and the futile hope that it will work out, but then all the paints just get mixed in an old, strange color and then, I don’t know, the paint cans…

… They fall

And the snake... become a writing desk and…

Falls.

Or something like this.

Look, it’s 4 AM, just because Remy is awake into another insomnia episode, it doesn’t mean he is functional. You don’t expect a metaphor wonderfully meaningful, Shakespeare.

His eyes wandered through the desk’s extension once again. He has found a Furniture Store halfway to his apartment and now the picture of the said insistently shined in his mind, as if his brain wanted to tell him something but it was too much tired to formulate the message into words and for that reason it just threw random images in his synapses and hoped that would be enough. A handful flashes of memories gleamed in front of his eyes: The lustrous furniture, the small statues, pleasantly useless which everyone knows that will regret of buying in the exact second they step out of the store, the extremely difficult to clean, but also so comfortable and soft and big and soft carpets, beautiful writing desks…

Yes, yes, yes.

Beautiful writing desks, unlike that one, they had handles.

Handles, writing desk, store, soft… Wait, his living room was also different. It was… changed, organized, new...

New as a writing desk he saw in a store.

Oh, yeah.

He had been wanting to redecorate his apartment for a long, long time, albeit he never found enough… time to do such a thing. However, which time is better than the present? When an apocalypse broke all the notions of economy formerly intrinsic in the society and the money lost all its value since there were no one in the city to valorize it, anymore.

Or in the whole world.

He wonder if there is still people in the world. Some part of Remy, that part usually pushed to the dark corners of his mind which currently was too much sleepy to attempt to hide it, hoped so.

What was he thinking before??

…

Oh, yeah. Store, soft (the apartment’s owner let go an annoyed scoff while glanced to his floor and noticed it didn’t looked comfortable in any way, as a child who didn’t gained his favorite toy. Yet, an unsupervised and with a total of zero self-control left in a store without any camera nor people and with enough strength to run away with his toy, child.) and redecorate his living room.

The coffee lover wasn’t going to overdo it, of course. He already had moved the couch to the other side of the room seeking to modify his television’s position and open free space to the future his gigantic carpet, which he definitely was intending to get. Comfy enough to sleep in case he falls of his couch (something that occurred with a, at least, irritating frequency) and became without reasons or will to get up, so he could just turn and go back to sleep. He also had already cleaned all the room, floor and furniture with a sweet lavender scent which maybe he had exaggerated a bit, no that he would admit that out loud, not even if someone threatened his coffee (Ha! Remy would like to see some bitch try). The only thing that was missing was the desk.

He clicked his tongue. Yup. His decision has been made.

“Sorrey, gurl, but I did everything I could. Your time has arrived.” and, with that emotional speech, he started to push it towards his door. Even empty, the furniture was a lot heavier than it seemed.

His arm muscles ached and his panting breathe was almost as fast as the sweat droplets sliding down his face, certainly only a consequence about how much heavy and almost impossible to move the writing desk was and absolutely not from the thousands of years spent bathed in sedentary lifestyle without doing a single one physical exercise. Pfff. Of course not.

His brain sent him an accusing memory of a lost battle against a pickle can tightly closed. Remy told his brain to fuck off.

The adult fixed his glare at the stairs leading to the ground floor and he could have sworn he heard each one of the steps mockingly crackling at his astonished expression, almost as if they knew that no matter how much Remy stared at them with hate, they wouldn’t disappear nor make the travel easier.

The only soul woke at 5 AM reorganizing his apartment in the middle of a Post Apocalypse tried anyway.

…

Shit.

He turned, seeking to change the angle and thus push the odious piece of furniture better, his gaze then finally fell on the window which had originally been completed and was now just a hollow shadow of his past.

(Remy was so good at poetry, seriously. He should write a book. He would get rich easily. He would make so much money until the point when he would be able to buy all the Coffee Shops in the world, then he will order someone to build the biggest caffeine shop of the entire world so he could spent the rest of his life there drinking coffee and watching generic Coffee Shops AU’s being canon. Yeah. It sounds like a great plan. Holy shit, he was so fucking smart. How didn’t he have an Oscar, yet?)

An epiphany struck his mind.

He looked at the furniture, the stairs and, in the end, his window.

…

Perfect.

A cat warily wandered down the street, his fur bristling towards the sky in an attempt to make them look bigger and riskier that they usually was, something which, honestly, just their two colored eyes shining mid the cold air of night as two danger signs was enough. The same eyes that now fixated themselves on the messy, shattered pile of pieces of wood in their most diverse sizes and shapes that definitely did not belong in that landscape. The feline hissed to the said before hissing towards of the steps which began to echo in the place, clearly showing their dominance before any and every living being that dared to dwell the same planet as them. However, in an act of mercy, the animal got a notepad from the wreckage and elegantly ran out, researching to their next victim.

Remy threw some flowers that he found in a forgotten vase on one of his shelves on the remains of what had once been his desk. His ear still buzzing from the previous crash.

“We spent great memories together. You did your best and now it's time for you to rest in peace.” - Gave some reassuring pats on the wood and jumped back when a splinter got in his finger, probably karma. The coffee lover wished he had his sunglasses on so his clearly superior human gaze would obtain more effect (effect that didn’t had much help with how much he was shaking his injured hand from side to side, a few begin of tears taking over his eyes’ corners. THAT THING HURTS, OKAY???) - “Bitch.”

And turned away, hair fabulously dancing in the cold, stuffy nighty wind as he departed towards a Pharmacy nearby, which probably should have some tweeze. His steps sounding and being wobbly by the tiredness due all the exercises executed that night and the sleep, his rebel son, who had finally arrived from its walk. Remy asked to himself if the Pharmacy also possess some chair or couch for him lay down, since there was exactly zero percent of chances for him to use the stairs again in such a short period of time.

His thoughts were interrupted by a voice, calm and low, albeit of tune and words extremely clear, which had cut through the silent street. The sound was already so weird, new and incredibly nostalgic that, for a heartbeat, he was immediately paralyzed. Wide eyes trying to concentrate themselves enough in the form focusing midst the darkness.

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wheredidhiseyebrowsgo · 5 years

Note

MORE MALE POLYPACK FICSSSSS PLEASE

OKAY! - Anastasia

Past and Present by goddessofcruelty

(1/1 I 2,269 I Explicit)

Jordan rushes to Peter, who catches the younger man, slides arms around his waist and lifts him up. Jordan's legs wrap around the older man's hips, arms around his neck, and holds Peter tightly. The Sheriff arches a brow at Chris. “I'd say they definitely know each other.”

Love-Letters in the Form of Dresses by Whispering_Sumire

(1/1 I 16,025 I Mature)

"Ah!" Stiles cuts him off, scooting closer to the wooden bars that seemingly make up his prison, "No! You're both here for a reason, okay? Don't be a speciest bigot, Chris, you're the best of a bad lot, I expect you to act like it," Chris is shocked to actually feel chastened, he puts his gun back in his waistband, "And Peter, you are smart enough to ask questions first. Sane enough, too, might I add."

"Well, then," Peter says, still glaring, and Chris wonders how this boy all dolled up in a dress, knows all this about them. "I suppose my first question would be: Why did you invite a Hunter to join us, hmm?"

"Same reason I asked you to join me, Peter," Stiles answers, and doesn't even bother hiding how coy he's being, "I'm lonely. I wanted people to talk to, and I wanted said people, specifically, to be useful to a certain cause, later."

"And what cause would that be?" Chris asks, wary.

"That," Stiles beams, "is a secret."

[Or: The one where there's a boy in a dress, a werewolf, and a hunter. It sounds like the beginning of a joke, but it's all fairly serious business... Mostly.]

living on borrowed time (but we live it so well) by cywscross

(3/3 I 23,943 I Teen)

Whatever last desperate piece of magic Gerard played after his body rejected the Bite, even that old bastard probably didn’t mean to raise the dead with it. Not that it makes a difference either way of course.

'cause you're on your own (in the real world) by canistakahari

(1/1 I 26,368 I Explicit)

Scott only invites Derek over the first time because he thinks he's lonely. It gets a lot more complicated from there, but to be honest, Scott doesn't really mind.

Memento Mori by HDHale

(2/4 I 28,000 I Explicit)

To save Stiles being stuck at home, isolated all summer, and stewing on his recent possession and the deaths he’d caused, he agreed to the unexpected offer of joining Chris Argent for a retreat in France.

What good Peter’s exile would do, Stiles was clueless.

In Any Version of Reality by alisvolatpropiis

(7/7 I 39,853 I Explicit)

Standing next to not-Derek – whoa, holding not-Derek’s hand? – is someone who looks remarkably like Stiles. Is Stiles, a slightly-altered replica, just like this guy both is and isn't Derek.

It’s not like looking into a mirror – one, because looking into a mirror actually makes some kind of sense, and two, because not-Stiles looks older too, mid twenties maybe. And the tips of his short, spiky hair are dark purple, and he’s got a lip ring and he’s shirtless and covered in tattoos and what the holy hell?

“Time travel?" He's sufficiently freaked. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he hears his dad laughing.

“Not exactly,” not-Derek says, and shit, even his voice sounds exactly the same, disconcertingly gentle. He gestures behind him, and Stiles looks over his shoulder, where behind him, scattered across the porch and in the front yard, are more…Dereks and more Stileses.

Fourteen total, including the two at the door, he notes distantly, eyes feeling like they’re about to pop out of his head from bulging so hard.

Seven other Dereks. Seven other Stileses.

Seven Derek and Stiles pairs.

Failing by TriDom

(16/20 I 66,788 I Explicit)

Stiles goes home to Beacon Hills after five years away. He gets set up in an apartment with the help of his dad and starts taking classes at the local university. The town is old and it's boring, it's safe and it's stable. It's just the kind of place that Stiles needs to get his feet back underneath him, after managing to completely fuck his life.

Scarlet by Red Whip the Destoyer of Law (tajita_chan)

(19/19 I 81,626 I Explicit)

Fed up with being taken for granted and tired of feeling rejected, Stiles starts to pull away from the pack he's not sure he's even a part of in the first place. Along the way of building up his self image, he meets some new fabulously flamboyant friends and rediscovers a side of himself he'd forgotten about.

Plus One by migratoryslashfan

(43/43 I 101,445 I Mature)

Stiles takes a pregnancy test as a joke. It turns up positive.

Desolate by Vague_Shadows

(27/27 I 130,463 I Explicit)

Derek stops short the moment his eyes fall on the huddled mass in the corner. The beta lying crumpled there is trying desperately to make himself seem as small as possible and cover his most vulnerable areas. It takes Derek almost a full minute to realize who it is and another to realize that he’s wearing tattered, blood-stained remains of the clothes he disappeared in over four months ago. The acrid stench clinging to him tells such a vivid story of the atrocities he must have endured while he’s been missing that Derek thinks he might be sick.

“Stiles?” he asks in disbelief.

Iron Claws and Fragile Hearts by TVTime

(65/? I 326,253 I Explicit)

Friend or foe? Packmate or werewolf? Safety and security or excitement and danger?...Good or evil?

Unfortunately, not all choices are black and white, and sometimes heroes and monsters lurk where they don't belong.

As supernatural forces loom large and threaten to destroy his pack, Isaac has a choice to make: Stiles or Ethan?

#teenwolf #sterek #steter #stetopher #polyamory #stiles stilinski #derek hale #chris argent #peter hale

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lost-incident-kid · 4 years

Text

Happy Birthday Miyu Sugisaki (for tommorow) might do some art for her idk

———

Edit: ah heck! Ive had this queued for months, but i forgot to actually do the art haha, i’ll get something done overnight so it might be rushed and look like trash, it might look reasonably ok. Who knows at this point. I dont trust the sleepy version of myself to create anything good but hey, theyv created some stuff that wasn’t horrifying before :/

Ok, starting here i legit just start live-blogging myself staying up alnight drawing. Ignore me. I didnt know where else to say it. I’ll delete it later.

Edit 2: this isnt gonna be done. Like frick, i just spent 6 hours on miyu’s fricking hairstyle, thats all done and even shaded and looking fabulous but ive only got a rough lineart for litterally everything else. This might not be done, but if it is then her hair is gonna be a fuckign masterpiece (i hope). Im writing this edit at 1:42am, and im gonna go to bed somewhere between 4 and 5, lets go! Hell yeah! I might do this! Perhaps! Im gonna try! 3-4 sprint time! Yeah!

Edit 3: frick, im failing to do this, miserably. Its 3:03am and i got distracted playing mobile games and didn’t get anything done. My existence is futile, existentially im a waste and I should not exist. The atoms within me deserve to be part of something better. Sorry. I’m a f*ck up and unless I get my sh*t together in the next like 5 mins (unlikely) then this aint gonna be finished.

Edit 4: ok, meltdown like 20% over. Its 3:52am, I think the issue then was the face. Faces r hard bruh, they suck do draw. They a festive lil ho ho ho. I was drawing everything too high up on the face cuz my dumb *ss forgot to draw the line thingys on the face or even look at a reference image for proportions. Ive done it now amd life is now a bit more on track. Might get this done if I continue work in the morning.

Edit 4.5: nothin much (hence the .5), its 4:14am, just downed 4 cups o tea for caffeine and sugar (all the coffee we got is decaf lol). I’m gonna get this sh*t done! Ive litterally only coloured down to the face, neck and the hair but still.... I’m gonna get it done anyway! I dont care about going to bed between 4-5 anymore! I’m getting this done!

Edit 5: its less than ten mins later (4:22am) and im taking a quick 20m break to watch youtube while I wait for the caffeine to kick in because im too braindead to continue right now. Like what art style am i even trying? Idk... its really fricking complex tho. Lowkey pretty tho, like if i finish this im gonna be so proud of it like it looks great. But its taking forever and im need break.

Edit 6: ok we back. Its 4:41am, caffeine has not really kicked in but i cant permit myself any more time anyway. Back to drawning.

Edit 7: holy frick, new episode of the vrains dub came out. Man... im leaving vrains fanart to watch the vrains dub. Am I obsessed? Is this hyperfixation? Probably? Either way, its 4:50am and im going to go watch the new episode. I’ll come back to this when im done.

Edit 8: HOLY FRICK GUYS! THE DRAWING APP IM USING KEEPS CRASHING AND SAYS ITS STILL THERE BUT WONT LET ME CONTINUE AND KICKING ME OFF THE APP?!?! ITS 5:06AM AND THE PANIC ATTAC IS BACC! The new episode of the dub isnt completely out yet, im watching that version on yt where its just smol clips of it. Not all the clips r up yet. I was just going on it while waiting for the next clips to go up and thats when the app did the thing and life got 280% sucky-er.

Edit: 8.5 wahoot it stopped kicking me off the app and it let me continue. Its 5:12am and we are FINALLY continuing.

Edit 9: its 5:36 Im tired sleep time I’ll finis thos in the morning goodbye yall have a greatt day

Edit 10: ok, so im a failure. We live in the timeline that god abandoned. I cannot sleep. I shall get more cups of tea, watch yt until the caffeine actually kicks in, and then continue. Its 6:03 right now, I shall be back. Perhaps half an hour?

Edit 10.5: its 6:11am. Not much has happened, just a slight change of plans. Ik its irrelevant but im liveblogging so i gotta say, my eye hurts so im gonna stop looking at screens. Perhaps gonna try to sleep again, if not then i’ll put read a book, redo my makeup (it smudgey) or straight up just listen to music and stare into the void. Litterally anything other than look at my laptop/phone. Peace out homies, i’ll be back at some point before 7 probably (unless i do go to sleep).

Edit 11: Its 6:41am, my eye hurts. Ive been staring into the darkness and listening to various fallout boy songs. Now i feel edgy. Its been half an hour, so im gonna continue drawing. Caffeine and sugar has worn off again so im tired and unmotivated but yno what, it is what it is. Aint life nifty, i gotta get this done.

Edit 12: 6:52 everything burns im in pain my eye is on frickign fire and it looks bloodshot but now also weird azz headache that i never got one like this before so im gonna turn off all lights cuz that seems to make it marginally better am i dying probably idk either way im not gonna continue for multiple hours it is stare into the void time and stare into the void time alone ok this should be the last update

Edit 13: It is 3:16pm, didn’t continue liveblogging cuz i got one heck of a migrane. Im back and well... Happy birthday Miyu for today! I’m still gonna try to get this god forsaken art done, but holy shit what is that art style i did. Its genuinely nothing like anything ive done before, I don’t remember doing any of the colouring but apparently I did and it looks better than anything ive done before and idk if non-fricked up me can replicate it. I’m starting to wonder if i got bored and just copied it or something, like idk how i did it. Look at it

The grey is the lineart I remember doing but man tHE FRICKIGN HAIR like i couldnt have created that, could I? I can see why it was taking so long yesterday like holy shit man that stuff takes time yno

#long post

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chac-ozai · 5 years

Photo

A cut straight out of a ficlet I wrote for @ryu-no-joou about Modern AU Chac’s struggle with a falling out with his best friend Teldryn.

What the hell, why not post it?

Jealousy

“Chac Ozai went from being “Single” to “In a relationship””

Teldryn scrolled passed it in a hyperactive haze, the big heart symbol beside Chac's name link caught his attention, and he scrolled up. His heart dropped, what the fuck is this? For the first time in weeks Teldryn clicked on his best friend's FB page and was amazed at what he'd missed by unfollowing him a few months ago. There where dozens of pictures of him taken by someone else, a bright smile on his face; there was some of him posing on someone's old car, of Chac climbing a tree shirtless, of him asleep on someone's couch with a giant lizard resting on his bare chest.

“Who...the...fuck.” Teldryn started to sweat, something in his heart squeezing at the sight. He was jacked up tonight, it was no different than the rest of his days lately, but the next set of pictures sent Teldryn's mind spiraling downward. Chac was hugging on a man taller than him, he had well-defined muscles and a ashen-brown mohawk. His best friend looked enamored with this unnamed person, and a fire started in Teldryn's gut.

From one picture to the next Teldryn paced up and down his apartment, Junie following him dutifully. The guy had no facebook profile, and he looked WAY older than Chac; what the fuck?! When he scrolled passed a picture of Chac kissing the rough-looking guy he saw that both Sirius and Vorstag had “liked” the image, Vorstag had a comment below- “You both look happy! I'm glad you decided to get serious.”

…..”Serious”?? How did he not know about this guy? This blatant ripoff? In a fit, Teldryn scrolled through until he found Sirius on his contacts, messaging him a long block of text after taking a screenshot of Chac kissing the stranger.

He sent it as an attachment, and underneath- “Who the fuck is this guy? I find it dsisturbing that Chac would keep this infomartion for me, how long has this been going on? I ahv been busy and so that means everyone can just cut me out of the loop? Wha'ts his name? Where did they meet? Chac must be going mad for dating a man that old. What the fuck”

Teldryn was smoking a cigarette furiously in his bathroom by the time Sirius bothered texting him back, the guy on the other end was fucking pissed and it showed clearly through the tenor of his text. Sirius wanted to complain directly to his husband but they where both at their jobs, choosing to just screenshot the incoherent text and send it to his husband. Oh, he had something to say to Tel for this.

“If you had bothered to talk to Chac at any point in the past few months you'd have known he's dating a new man. Guess what he got done with crying over your dumb ass. He's happy for the first time since YOU chose the fuckin powder over your best mate. What the fuck do you have to say anyway, you don't love him and you damn well don't want to date him. I bet youre high right now. When you're sober you won't give a shit. Leave Chac alone.”

Teldryn suddenly felt like hitting his head against something, it was a rush of energy and painful emotions that struck him deep. He was going to destroy his fancy new phone but decided to attempt a coherent text back, threateningly.

“Give me his name. What's his fucking name.”

Sirius got nervous. Teldryn had been very unstable the last he saw him and he hated the idea of him getting involved in Chac's love life again. “Why, Teldryn? Planning on committing a murder? You jealous Chac isnt crying over you anymore?”

Teldryn never sent a text back. Sirius was irrationally worried and had projected these ideas to Vorstag, wanting to find a way to keep Chac safe. Neither of them knew the proper route to take, and for the married couple Teldryn had once again seemed to disappear from their lives. Months went by.

Chac was filled with an energy he hadn't known in a long time; music flowed from him at his live show like it had been once when he was inspired by love. He felt as if it was back to the way it was, his eyes bright and shining for the crowd of fans who had rejoiced the return of their local musician. Chac was offered a drink by a fan and he sipped at it, a high five going out to the fan who had long sought his return. These early summer months, warmth on the breeze and music in his heart, Chac was feeling perfect right where he was.

“I've been working on a song for a little while now, It's my first time trying it out but I want to dedicate it to someone very important to me in the audience somewhere. He doesn't know I've been working on this, but you know who you are and I guarantee every word in it's for you, babe.” Chac got comfortable on his stool and prepped his violin, tapping his foot on a variety of pedals until a long came to life. He scanned the crowd and saw Gage was sitting by himself with a worried smile on his face.

What was that boy planning? Porter thought to himself. Chac swayed as he began to play his violin, coming to life in a dramatic Orbison vibe.

“Walking, spend a lot of time walking

That's what people do, getting over you

Smiling, did you see me smiling?

The whole act's just for you

What else can I do?

People say I'm better off alone, So I'm trying, trying, trying

Oh please, if you see me cry

I apologize, I'm a little crazy, crazy crazy”

Gage had no idea what to do with himself, tears welled up in his eyes before he even had a chance to man up. He picked up his shirt and covered his nose and his mouth, eyes locked with Chac's. He knows they've had a rough patch, but the soul that Chac's voice projected towards him was too much to bear. Chac's singing mouth was smiling as he saw Gage crying like a baby in that corner, could see his big strong boyfriend reduced to a puddle by the sound of his voice.

“Please, if you change your mind

I won't change mine

So i'm trying trying trying

I'm on my knees, I'm on my knees!

I know you're over me

and it's driving me crazy, crazy, crazy”

These lyrics where meant for him. Every word Chac cried out was a direct message from his heart to the Dunmer's. Teldryn was sure of this as he watched from far away enough that the musician wouldn't see him.Was this what he was doing, calling out in a fit of passion to him week after week at these shows, and Teldryn hadn't been there to hear it? Not sober but coming down, Teldryn's mohawk cruised through the crowds of young people like a shark's fin as he flanked the stage. He was looking for a better view, but was pushed to the back as the song crescendos into nothingness, followed by a roar of applause.

“Thank you. That was a rough one.” Chac placed his violin down and opened his arms up, walking through the crowd and towards the lonely table where Gage sat wiping up his tears. Teldryn's hawk eyes locked on the sight of Chac going to hug the man he'd seen in the pictures and despised. The older man had his face buried into Chac's shoulder, both of their arms looped around each other and hugging tightly. For the first time, Gage wasn't ashamed of the public display; he was however..ashamed of everything else.

“I'm sorry, baby.” Gage choked out, his voice ragged.

“I forgive you. Love you.” Chac kissed his right eyelid and left for the stage again, his heart feeling renewed.

Teldryn could have killed the man with his glare. From a dozen paces back and over a sea of shorter folk, Teldryn glowered at the man Chac claimed to be in a relationship with. Charlatan! He receded into the depths and got another drink to calm his nerves, listening to Chac fall back on the old songs he used to listen to every weekend night in the past.

People recognized him there, and that was obviously so- Teldryn was at almost every single show Chac performed in the past years, only recently having given up his place as his helper. He thought about the lyrics Chac sang out, begging for a change of heart..that he wasn't over him. Fuck that being about what's-his-face over there, that big crybaby. Teldryn's heart shook in his chest at the memories of these concerts, how Chac had promised Teldryn once upon a time that every love song had Teldryn at it's center.

The concert was over before Teldryn could decide what to do with himself; he was a few drinks in and had just enough chutzpah to make his entrance; yes. He came here for a reason and that was to see Chac, screw the other guy being there. Chac made his grand exit speech and was folding up his equipment with the help of Gage when Teldryn fixed his lapels and strode up to the scene.

“Just when I thought I'd never see you again,” Teldryn spoke, his voice proud and so unique. “Fabulous performance, Chac. As always.”

Both men turned from their work to look at the tall Dunmer, Chac's every feature went stark with shock-

“Teldryn! Holy shit, since when have you been back?!” Chac felt awkward but opened his arms for the hug that Teldryn went for, stunning red eyes casting a quick glare at the older man beside them.

“Not long, not long.” Teldryn sighed, holding onto that hug long enough to raise an eyebrow. “Couldn't come back home and not say hi!”

Chac pulled away and looked to Gage immediately, who wasn't smiling but looking at the very gay-looking Dunmer with a mysterious expression. “So, uh, Teldryn. This is my ...friend, PG.” He stammers, opening a palm towards Gage.

Obviously, Gage wasn't going to touch him. He did a nod, his features dark. “Feel like I've seen'ya around.” Gage comments, Teldryn chilled to think that Chac was dating a southern guy.

“..Uh, Teldryn is featured in a lot of the advertisements around Times Square..maybe that's it.”

“Come now, Chac. Don't introduce me like that. How do you do,” Teldryn extended his hand, glaring at Gage- “Chac and I go miles back. He's my best friend.”

“Huh.” Gage reached out and practically crushed Tel's hand in his own “Best friend? Strange, I haven't heard of you at all since the time I've been dating Chac.”

“...dating?” Teldryn feigned surprise, he slapped Chac on the back and the musician was utterly red-faced. “Well there's a twist and a half! Why don't I buy you two a drink and maybe we can do a spot of catching up?”

Chac was so torn, he hadn't seen Teldryn in person for so long he'd forgotten how he looked, how the very air that clung around him seemed to just be so taken by his presence. Gage had noticed it too, he was glowering at the thought of this dandy stranger wanting to reconnect with Chac. What was going on here?

Chac was going to say no. He should have, but by god when Teldryn looked at him with a smile that could warm hell over, he couldn't help but say yes. “Yeah, I'd like that. PG, how about you? Do you mind?”

Hell yeah, he minded. Porter had a killer headache kicking in from all the tears he'd shed before, but now he had to sit around and keep Chac happy while he caught up with this supermodel?”

The three of them sat down, Chac in the middle with his drink. Porter immediately went to scan his phone, he wasn't looking at anything in particular but he'd be damned if he wasn't listening to every little thing the two of them shared. Chac held Gage's hand, but everything else was affixed to Teldryn as he told a grand story about Hollywood.

“-and then I opened the door to the set medic and saw him trying to fish the shoe out of his ass before the director came back from break.”

“PPFTTT HAHAHA!” Chac howled, hard enough to spill his damn drink on his knee. Teldryn seemed so kind to offer him a napkin before Gage could reach them, Chac reaching up and wiping a tiny tear away from his eye. Teldryn was making him laugh nonstop, maybe it was the anxiety of finally seeing Tel again or just forgetting how fucking hilarious he always was, but he could not get himself to stop giggling. Long minutes went by before the bar was closing up, and Teldryn had exactly what he wanted.

“Well it was bloody grand to see you again, I'm home for good so if you're in the area...”

“Yeah, Tel. That sounds good. Maybe we can chill with Sirius and Vorstag again, get the whole gang together.”

“Whatever you want.” Tel went in and did it, he gave Chac a kiss on the cheek before heading off, Gage staring daggers at the beautiful Dunmer as he left the bar. They still had more packing to do and Porter was simply floored by what just happened; Chac was never like that until tonight. A giggling, soppy mess.

“Known each other long, I take it.”

“uh..Yeah, 7 years. He's been in and out of the friend group as of late, last I heard of him he was doing commercials in Hollywood.”

“Yup, heard that. He mentioned it maybe 5 times. You guys ever...ya know, date?”

Chac could immediately see where Gage was coming from after that comment. Shit, was he really that giddy around Teldryn?

“No! No, he's straight. I think he's dating a Nigerian model right now.”

“Hell, He coulda fooled me.” Gage didn't feel his heart hurt any less by the statement, but he kept it down.

“Yeah, people say that. He's just uh, very British...um, enough about him, eh? Let's get back home and get to sleep.”

“Uh huh. You're the boss.” Gage said flatly. He had some digging to do tonight, even if it meant making a dumb FB profile to do it.

#my gay art #Porter Gage #Chac Ozai #Chacozai #modern AU #FO4 #Teldryn Sero #fanfic

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rwbyremnants · 5 years

Link

CHAPTER WARNINGS: awkward public boner, sexy underwear.

NOTE: These next chapters do not take place during Dustmas. Also I'm sorry, I wanted to get the rest of this posted last month (Christmas In July haha) but got too distracted by new writing, and also life. I really do apologise. Then again, I'm not sure people are even still keeping up with this account anyway LOL

Either way, I hope you guys like this random selection from the RWBYRemnants Vault! There’s tons more to come in the future!

=Chapter 5

A few months later, Ruby's birthday had come and gone. She had a small party of her own back at the Xiao Long residence, this time with not as much alcohol. But now, she was old enough to drink. And to do other things.

Not that it was something Blake Belladonna had acted upon. Since Dustmas, they hadn't had another such encounter. Not even a kiss. It seemed that an entire morning of Weiss and Yang flinging accusations at them sort of scared them off from pursing anything more. But it made no difference; if anything, Blake enjoyed her company and friendship all the more in those months. Despite how much fun Dustmas was, Blake didn't think to bring it back up. Not until her friend made the first move. After her negative reaction to a wandering hand, it was only fair that way.

And as agreed, for her birthday treat, she's taken her on a rather small trip around Vale. It was such a simple request that Blake didn’t dare refuse it, even though she privately hoped to find something a little more special to do for her while they explored.

"So we've been to the weapon stores, Dust Till Dawn, Tukson’s… where next?"

"Maybe we should grab a bite to eat!" Ruby chirped happily, reaching out and snaring Blake's hand. This was the most contact they had enjoyed since the bathroom that morning, though they had done it with increasing regularity. "What sounds good to you?"

"No, it's your birthday, Ruby. You should choose." As much as she wanted to say ‘fish’, she understood not everyone had her taste for it. The birthday girl ought to have something she loved. "Something sweet? I know a place that does a good strawberry sundae."

"Whaaaaah!" Ruby gasped, glowing. "Do they… do they crumble up cookies on top?! Oh, that's the best! Let's go, let's go, where is it?!"

"Hey hey, alright, alright!" she laughed, leading her up the road along the various pathways to get to where she had in mind, cutting through various different alleyways along the way.

Soon they were seated in a small restaurant, Ruby bouncing up and down and Blake humouring her. The menu was not strictly dessert items, as it turned out, but their dessert list was extensive. They found a booth near the window, where the Vale sun could smile down on them as they waited to be served.

"I'll have one hot dog and a glass of water, and then your triple-decker strawberry sundae with bananas, cookie crumbs, and extra whipped cream!" she blurted at the waitress before she had finished asking if they were ready to order.

"Sorry, she's just a bit excited," Blake chuckled, remaining calm throughout looking at the menu. Was there anything she actually wanted? "Just your fish-and-chips for me, please."

Once the server had disappeared off into the kitchen, Ruby turned back to Blake and said, "So! Um… that party was…" Dropping her voice, she whispered, "Yang should never be given both beer and fireworks."

"I had a feeling something like that would happen, a fireproof woman in control of fireworks; what could possibly go wrong?" She laughed, folding her hands atop the table.

"Everything!" Ruby chuckled in return. The server brought two glasses of water and nipped back into the kitchens, and Ruby drummed her fingers on either side of her glass. Thoughtful for a second.

"Hmm? What’s up?"

"I'm, um… I was wondering about something." As she went on, her voice got steadily quieter, and her head hunched down lower. "Is there… a reason you haven't w-wanted to kiss me the past few months? Or be alone with me for more than a few minutes? Or anything like that?"

Of course, that wasn't what Blake expected. At all.

"I wasn't sure if you were ready," she admitted. "Or if maybe it was just a drunken mistake you made, a-and you wanted me to leave it alone from then on. So I thought I'd let you make the first move instead of being pushy again."

"But I'm not… I don't make moves. I have no moves! Moves are not what I do! I mean, outside of the battlefield." Ruby shrugged one shoulder. "And I guess when you didn't try to kiss me or anything again, I just figured… yeah, too much wine. That's fine if it's true! So, um, I guess that's… what I wanted to ask. Yep."

"Well…" She was visibly blushing, leaning in toward the girl to whisper to her, "I know it sounds stupid, but I'm also kind of… afraid? Because we're both girls, and I’m the way I am – and then at the time, you were underage. If Yang found out… well, let's just say I'd have ended up like that fence she decided to throw a rocket at!"

Wincing at the mental image, Ruby whispered back, "Y-yeah, all of those things are true, I guess. But I don’t think it sounds stupid. Sure, I wasn't expecting to like kissing a girl, but that's mostly because I never thought about it before. Do we have to care about that other stuff, though? If we decide not to do anything about w-what we did before, I want it to be our decision, not somebody else's."

She made a good point. Making a choice based on how she thought other people would feel about it was ridiculous. Ruby was old enough to decide what she wanted – hell, she was their team leader!

Clearly, they both enjoyed their tryst under the Bristletoe, alongside the other events that happened. And the girl was very beautiful, and cute, and fun to hang out with. Everything she could ever want.

"…I do really like you, Ruby," she managed to breathe as she took hold of Ruby’s hands, holding her breath afterward.

"And I like you, too." Blushing and grinning, she shrugged and continued in a brighter tone of voice, "So maybe we kinda messed up at the start there and went too fast, but can't we start over? Just let things flow naturally? I'm up for that if you are."

Just then, however, the waitress brought out their hot dog and fish and laid them in front of their respective table settings. Within an instant, she let go of Ruby's hand. Not that she realised it may offend the younger girl. Unlike Ruby, it seemed with the affairs of love, Blake was extremely private. No one knew of her past relationships; Ruby was the only one to know she had a partner in that way previously at all. With Ruby, at least there was reason to hide it in public; some people still weren't comfortable with homosexual relationships, despite it being such a small portion of the global community. But hiding her past experiences from the person she now shared everything with was silly.

Ruby did in fact flinch when her hand was released, but she tried to hide the reaction behind her hot dog. They didn't say much until the sundae was brought out, and then they both gasped.

"This… is the biggest, most awesome thing I've ever seen in my life!" she squealed as she gazed at the lumps of ice cream so covered in toppings that she almost couldn't see any of it. "How do they serve this to a single person?!"

"I knew you'd love it here." Blake grinned.

Even when Ruby was well into her ice cream, she was still going on her fish, savouring the delicious flavours on her tongue. And the fries were also cooked wonderfully. The younger girl only had eyes for her dessert until she was about halfway through it and Blake had polished off her meal. Then she paused with her spoon halfway to her mouth, thought for a minute, and held it out to Blake.

"Wanna bite?"

"Oh, you don't mind?" she asked, looking down at the spoonful of strawberry ice cream, cookie crumbs spilling to the tablecloth. "It's your gift, you know."

"What's the fun of getting a dessert bigger than your head if you can't share it?"

"Well… Alright." She couldn't argue with that logic! Besides, it looked fabulous. And so she leaned across the table, taking the spoon full of desert into her mouth.

It was heaven. Unlike any ice cream he had tasted before, it was deliciously creamy, and light on her tongue. And the cookie crumbs added to the texture to overall deliver a wonderful flavour. Unable to help herself, her eyes closed in content. "Mmm…"

Giggling slightly at Blake's blissful expression, Ruby whispered, "Um, you can let go of the spoon and I'm pretty sure the ice cream stays in your mouth."

"Mm??" With that, she let the spoon fall from her mouth, giggling contentedly as she swallowed. "Holy shit. That was too good!"

That was the moment Ruby became glad they had picked a booth seat instead of chairs. Scooting closer, she dipped into the bowl for another bite and held it out for Blake. "Say 'ahhh'…"

Rolling her eyes, she gave in to the younger girl's demand, closing her eyes and opening her mouth. "Aaaaahhhh!"

"Nyooom!" Ruby said as she thrust the spoon inside.

"MFF!" Of course, she was surprised by the sudden intrusion of the spoon, but giggled as she quickly swallowed what was on the spoon. Snorting and cackling, Ruby dipped the spoon back into the bowl but then noticed something.

"Oh, you have…" Leaning in, she licked a tiny fleck of ice cream from the corner of Blake's mouth.

Blake blushed when feeling her tongue so close to her mouth. It bought back memories of their first night together, and where else that tongue was…

But those memories triggered a most unwanted reaction, as she could already feel herself becoming warm below. "Damnit…"

Ruby drew back, biting her bottom lip and raising her eyebrows at Blake in a questioning way. She wasn't quite yet aware that anything was truly wrong; she just knew she had flustered Blake slightly with her boldness, which had been the goal.

"Ruby…" She spoke quietly, quickly looking around the restaurant to make sure no one was watching them or could overhear. Thankfully, they were all tucked into their meals and ice cream and took no notice of their surroundings. Blake leaned toward her ear, whispering quietly, "Keep that up and I’ll have a problem… uh, down there."

"Hm?" Then she seemed to catch on to what sort of "problem" Blake meant. "Oh? Wait, here?!Wh-why?"

"You licking me." She looked around once again, suddenly feeling really self-conscious, one of her hands reaching down to cover herself as well. "I’ll be fine, but c-can you dial back with the flirting for a while? Just because… that definitely makes this condition worse."

Now Ruby was also looking around the restaurant cautiously. The few people there were at least four or five tables away. Added into that was the short tablecloth; it wasn't long enough to conceal her legs entirely, but certainly nobody could see that "problem" they were discussing.

"Um… okay, so I know I helped you before, but h-how can I help you now? This is kinda different!"

Managing to spot that the bathroom wasn't so far, she looked over to it, and then back to Ruby. "Look, you stay here and eat your dessert, I'll run to the bathroom and, um… take care of it."

"Really, it's that bad already?" Without thinking, Ruby reached under the table to press her hand against Blake. It wasn't quite fully aroused yet, but she could tell their conversation was making it steadily worse. "Whoa…"

"R-Ruby!!" she suddenly burst out, shuffling away from her by instinct. But her shout had gotten the attention of one of the waiters who looked over to their table. Able to sense the problem was only going to get worse, Blake quickly shuffled to the end of the seat. "I-I'm sorry, I have to- I gotta… Sorry."

And with that, she made a quick dash for the bathroom. Even when Ruby's goal was to only fluster her, it had worked too well, it seemed. But why did Ruby set her off so easily from barely doing anything at all?

"Blake!" Ruby hissed, but couldn't bring herself to speak any louder or say any more. Guilt shot through her chest. True, she hadn't meant to do anything of that nature, but she also couldn't stand knowing that her friend was dealing with something so difficult and it was as a result of something she did. A repeat of what happened in their bathroom on Dustmas also seemed to be unwise, given how upset Blake had seemed. Could she do nothing right?

---------------------------------------------------

It took quite a while for Blake to reappear again. Thankfully she had calmed down before her situation worsened, especially after washing her face with the cold water of the sink. There were words of apology when she had eventually returned, and all was back to well again as they finished dessert.

But on their walk back home, the Faunus kept thinking to herself. She couldn't keep doing that to Ruby, running off with no explanation, shying away and shutting her out. Ruby by now knew her better than anyone else, even more than her best friend and battle partner.

But there was one other person who knew her just as much, the very reason she acted that way. The reason she was so skittish about starting another relationship at all.

"Ruby?" she asked, walking by her side. "Have I ever told you about my partner before I came to Beacon?"

Looking up from her scroll, which she had just been checking, Ruby blinked at her companion. "Not that I can remember. Then again, I can be pretty scatterbrained sometimes."

"Well… I worked very closely with this guy. His name was Adam. We did quite a few raids together for the White Fang, protests, demonstrations. We were…" As she went on, she looked down, staring at her feet as they continued their journey. "We were close."

"Okay," Ruby prompted gently. She could tell this wasn't easy for Blake, but without further details she didn't quite know what else to say.

"Of course, we used to share our sleeping quarters. I didn't trust any of the other members, but Adam… I trusted him more than anyone. And the feeling was mutual, or so I thought." Her pace slowed as she delved deeper into her memories. "We were together a while, and when things were developing, we thought we'd… go further. But when he discovered what made me different from other women, he… he suddenly wasn't as kind as I thought. Or as trustworthy."

"Oh, Blake," Ruby breathed, hand closing around her upper arm gently. "That's not fair. Did he… hurt you, or anything?"

"No, not… physically." She looked back up again, and to the silver eyes looking back at her, then out in the direction they were walking. "He demanded I leave, put me in a group with men I didn't know. None of them did anything, but I was rather scared they would. Slowly, more of the members began making snide comments, giving me dirty looks. I knew he'd told a few, but of course, a rumour like that spreads."

A nauseated look flashed across the younger girl's face as she took in the thought of that. "So he… he punished you by outing you? Just for having different junk? But that's crazy, you have the same junk he has! Why would any of them care? I don't understand…"

The girl's naivety forced another chuckle from Blake. "Not everyone is as open minded as you, Ruby. Most of them called me a freak. Most of them made comments about me being some form of sex object, some even described what they wanted to do to ‘put me in my place’. It was humiliating. I don't think Adam meant for as many people to know as wound up knowing, but the fact he just tossed me aside over that… it hurt. And that's why I don't want people to know. I don't want anyone else just… Not liking me anymore over something I was born with and can’t do much about."

"Well…" Ruby's sentence died in her throat. It was true that other people thought differently from her, and she couldn't do anything about that or about Blake's past. All she could do in the moment was reassure her about the present and the future.

"Blake, I like you. A lot. And I can't deny finding out you're a little different was a surprise, but I mean, sometimes people have silver eyes and sometimes they have cat ears, or tails, and sometimes they have both boobs and a deal. That's just… it's details. Who people are on the inside is the important part, and I know not everybody's smart enough to understand that, but I am, and… and I think Weiss and Yang would probably understand, too. They're pretty smart."

"That is true. But…" She looked down again. "I just didn't see it important for them to know, you know? I'm not sleeping with them, so why is it important?"

"No, no, I'm not-" Squirming, she leaned in slightly to add, "I didn't mean you had to tell them. Just that if they found out, they wouldn't be like those White Fang guys. That's all."

"Ah… well, you’re probably right. Thanks." She smiled. Soon after, she locked her arm around Ruby's, leaning against her as they walked. "For the record… I like you, too."

Nodding, she replied, "Yeah, I'm pretty likable, huh?"

"You are. And humble." This time she leant in closer toward her ear, whispering rather quietly. "Another thing… you can help me out when we get back, if you wanted. J-just if you’re interested; if you aren’t, that’s fine."

Sputtering and flushing bright red, she whispered, "C-could I? I mean… are you sure you want me to? Because the other times it was just kind of a thing that happened, so I w-wanna make sure you really want my help!"

"Well I…" She too began to blush at the thought. Thankfully this time, it didn't cause any embarrassing results whilst they were on their way back, but she confessed, "I really, reallyenjoyed it… and I have to admit, I’ve thought about it a lot since then.”

“Really?! You thought about… me?” After a few more paces, she whispered, “Do you think about me while taking care of it?” Blake’s silence said it all, and she grinned. “That’s hot.”

“Yeah. I'm kinda curious to help you in the same way one day, if that makes sense?"

“What?!” When Blake didn’t answer, she gulped. "Well, I'm still not ready for that, I don't think… maybe I am? Wow, this wasn't what I was expecting to think about later today when I woke up!" Swallowing, lowered her voice as she responded, "But… can I explore a little? Explore you? Because it’s my turn to confess… I k-keep thinking about it. When I'm falling asleep, or in the shower, and it makes me kind of f-feel how you must have felt last Dustmas, s-so… whatever that means, I hope it's a good thing!"

"If you want to, of course. I don't wanna rush you into anything." She smiled, taking the younger girl's hand for the final stretch home. Yes, Ruby was now old enough to do this sort of thing, but after her own past, the last thing she wanted to do was to apply too much pressure on the girl.

"Don’t be silly! This is just another kind of adventure."

---------------------------------------------------

Alas, when they got back to the dorms, Weiss and Yang were already there, and immediately engaged them in a philosophical debate about whether or not using Dust on a pet was humane treatment. Blake immediately said it wasn't, and Ruby said that Zwei seemed to like the taste. The discussion wore on for quite some time, and neither of them found their way back to the "mood" afterward.

It wasn't until several days later, while they were in gym class doing flexibility exercises, that Ruby thought she might have an opportunity again. Their instructor was asking them to find people to spot each other, and she didn't hesitate.

"Spot me, Blake!" she blurted out. Weiss had been approaching, but having heard that she rolled her eyes and turned to walk toward Yang. Which of them she had been going to ask would forever remain a mystery.

"Oh don't look like that, sour-flake. I don't smell that bad, do I?" Yang smirked when Weiss was by her side again, one hand ruffling in her hair as she leant down to whisper teasingly, "Besides, you got to be as hands-on as you want…"

The heiress’s response would also be a mystery.

Ironically, that was precisely the reason why Blake was so eager to work with Ruby. Not only would it keep her secret safe, but it would allow her to also assist Ruby and touch her somewhat intimately. But not too much, of course.

Pacing off a few steps, Ruby turned back to her and whispered, "I can't believe Weiss wanted to partner up with any of us in the first place. Could have sworn she'd go for Pyrrha, given a choice."

"Pyrrha has Jaune though, that's a given." Of course when they were stood by one another's side, they awaited instructions. Truth be told, Blake didn't even know why they had this class; they were all very athletic and flexible, as performed many times in battle. Spotters weren't really necessary.

The first command came in: handstands. A simple enough start. Ruby turned to face Blake and shrugged, setting her feet slightly apart. "Okay, so do you wanna go first, or me?"

"You can, I'll make sure you won't tip over." Blake eagerly smiled, stepping back enough so Ruby could do as commanded. She was unable to help but look over to Yang and Weiss, who were currently arguing over who should go first.

A secret smile stole over Ruby's face. She had been hoping for this sort of thing. Planned for it. If her plans never came to fruition, it wasn't a big deal, of course. But if they did…

"Alright! Ready or not, here I handstand!"

In a quick, effortless move, she was being supported by only her two hands against the thick floormats, stocking feet flailing in the air above her. Right away, Blake was at hand to support her, hands quickly resting either side of her hips to help hold her upright as best she could get. However, apparently Ruby had only tucked her shirt in the back – and the view was marvelous. As she was stood upside down, her top fell slightly, allowing her to see the sultry black bra underneath.

"Oh…"

That told Ruby that she had seen the top. All that was left was to complete the show.

"Oh, what?" she said softly as she parted her legs slightly. Up through the legs of her shorts, someone at Blake's angle could clearly see yet more black lace that matched the bra.

As the blush coated her face, Blake immediately tried to look up and away from her. To other things to distract her. Ruby had planned this all along! Wearing matching bra and panties with rather lovely designs all over them. How she wanted nothing more but to strip her to nothing else and-

No. She had to keep composed while they were in the gym, and concentrated on holding her friend upright.

"Well," Ruby said somewhat suggestively as she flexed her hindmuscles. "How long do you think I'm supposed to keep this handstand up? She didn't say."

"Did you-" She looked around the room, sure enough to notice others were indeed getting out of their handstands in their own time, but Ruby had no plans just yet. Sneaking another gaze at the girl, she said as quietly as possible, "Did you plan this?"

When at last every other student had dismounted, Ruby did as well. People might talk if she kept handstanding too terribly long afterward. "Maybe," she admitted with a coy grin, though she was also flushed and panting from the effort. "Picked out some stuff last time I went into town with Yang. She, um, looked at me funny, but also seemed to think it was a 'rite of passage' kinda deal."

"I… um… wow." Rite of passage was certainly right, but it was the last thing Blake had suspected Ruby would try. She was always focused on fighting monsters, or leadership, or her friends. Never impressing anyone in the bedroom department!

Until now, it seemed. If only they weren't in public… but now of course, it was Blake's turn, and she couldn’t worry about what she might do if they were alone. "J-just spot me, you little jerk."

Nodding, Ruby stepped back so Blake could do the same, holding her arms out and away slightly. "Go for it!"

Right away, Blake bent down to her head, only to then bring her weight upon her hands as she stood upright. A lot more graceful then Ruby, there was no flailing of her legs. Of course, she had plenty of training for these sorts of thing in the White Fang, so she was a little ahead of the curve.

Indeed, Ruby reached forward to spot Blake directly as she had for Ruby, but it wasn't necessary; therefore she simply held her hands near her hips instead of on them. Of course, Blake's chest was much more ample than Ruby's was, and she elected to tuck her shirt into her shorts as a precaution against people who might want a peek.

The fact that Blake didn't need her direct spotting enabled Ruby to cast a glance over her shoulder. No one was watching them too closely. Turning back away from the crowd, she leaned in and delivered a swift and fleeting kiss against one of the thighs near her face, just under the hem of the shorts.

Now that was something to break the Faunus woman's composure! Immediately one of her arms began to wobble slightly, legs rocking as she managed to right herself. She hadn't been expecting contact at all!

"R-Ruby?! What are you playing at?!" she hissed as quietly as possibly.

"What?" Ruby giggled softly, kissing the other thigh. "It was just a little peck, no biggie!"

"J-just… G-gah!" Once again losing her balance, one arm completely gave way, making her fall over into the girl below. Unfortunately, the two fell into a rather unorthodox position: Ruby's head was right near the inbetween of Blake's legs.

That's when Ruby scented it; the smell of Blake's arousal. Oh, it wasn't particularly strong, and seemed as if it was slightly less than perfectly fresh… as if she had just felt a slight twinge a while ago and it had since departed. Even so, the scent wrapped itself around her and squeezed gently, and Ruby sighed in distant pleasure.

"Wow, coordinated much?" Weiss remarked from nearby, where she was standing on a single hand.

"Sh-showoff!" Ruby shot back at her.

After a call of concern from the teacher, Blake quickly struggled to get back up again, placing hands on either side of herself to force herself back up onto her feet. Only then did she help Ruby back up. Yes, there was arousal there from when she had stared at Ruby, but the girl was trying her best not to let it show elsewhere. That would be awful.

A flushed Ruby turned away just enough so that no one could hear her or see her mouth moving. "Blake, here? Seriously?"

"I'm trying not to…" Thankfully, no one would notice. Not unless they were really looking out for it. But it didn't matter so much. If she could hold off till the end of the lesson, the next period was lunch. And no one would be in the showers or changing rooms. Perhaps that was Ruby's plan.

Part of Ruby wanted to make things worse for Blake. At first, she didn't even understand why – but then suddenly realised it was because it meant she was enjoying her presence, the sight of her in the black lace. It gratified an ego she didn't even know she had, pleased her that she could elicit this type of reaction. But that would be a terrible thing to do.

Instead, she merely whispered, "Um… th-think about Jaune getting motion sickness."

"Eww, oh eww… " That was one way to make that go away, which certainly worked. Thankfully if she didn't think about it, she would last the end of the lesson. And then, have Ruby all to herself at lunch.

All to herself.

#Dustmas Cookies #rwby ladybug #rwby fanfiction #rwbyremnants

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wildflower8281 · 5 years

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Am I a Gypsy?

Today I sat down at a periwinkle wooden table with lime green cushioney chairs and journaled out how I want my life to look and feel for the next few years. All of the realms of it - feelings, body, home, work, friends, lovers, leisure. I’m currently house & pet sitting in a beautiful home in Scottsdale, with a huge pool, spacious, bright interiors and the sweetest, shaggy dog you’ll ever meet, Murray. It feels like a rather large Airbnb experience to me and has given my mind a place to rest and a bit of a vacay vibe, which is welcome after a few weeks of transition and seeking some new work opportunities.

So here I am: Age 37 and in a place in my life, yet again, where I can totally recreate my world in a new way. I’ve done this a few times already in my life and I look at it as a gift each time, albeit not always arriving when Kelly feels ready, or in the way Kelly thinks it might arrive, but a gift nonetheless - a space in time where I shed a version of myself that is no longer and step into something new, yet at the same time, is still fundamentally me.

(Photo: Current View, #house-sittinglife)

Past and Present

To give some perspective, 10 years ago, Summer 2009, I was halfway into a 4 year stint as a missionary nun in East Harlem, having 5 years of convent life under my belt. I spent a good part of that summer in Guyana, in S. America, living the adventure, sleeping under a mosquito net, driving on the left side of the road and boating down the river to visit remote communities. We organized a girls summer camp, bathed in the river twice a day and slept in tents for 2 weeks. It was pretty awesome honestly. Guyana and Harlem were both vibrant communities, with beautiful people and so many lessons. And yet, that life - as a religious sister - was not one I wanted to live for the rest of mine, so in 2011, I walked and it was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made.

(Photo: Bright Lights of Guyana, 2009)

So, when I say I’ve been here before, in this space of recreating my life and who I want to be in this world, I most definitely have been and returning home from the convent was one of those moments. At age 30, I came home from religious life with a few-inches-past-buzzed hair situation, 1 pair of sports pants, a few t-shirts, sneakers and sandals much too worn. For the past 8 years, my identity had been Sister Lumen (and/or Madre Lumen, at least in Harlem)....Now, I had to re-take-up my birth name and being of KellySue...Who the heck is that and what is she like at age 30 out here in this new world where people curse, read magazines and don’t ask permission for things?!

Holy Fucking Shit! (I wrote that honestly prior to realizing the amazing irony of the phrase...needless to say, I’ve come a long way.) Yea, the journey back into ‘the world’ is pretty fantastic actually, even though it’s laced here and there with some tears and fears. Everything from shopping for clothes, applying to jobs, making friends and, gasp, dating is like navigating uncharted waters when you haven’t even really been trained in how to sail. I have an entire post dedicated to “Things They Don’t Tell You When You Leave” here if you’d like to walk through the details: 15 Things They Don't Tell You When You Leave the Convent

So, post-convent I was faced with creating not only a new life in pragmatic ways, but truly a new identity. Or more accurately, finding the original one! So, while I dabbled in teaching and other cool gigs, flitted around with a few cool folks and loved a magical man from Brooklyn, the most important thing I “did” in New Jersey was find KellySue. And it was with that Found-Self that I boarded a 1-way flight to Arizona and knew in my gut the bright, mystical southwest would be my next home, and in many ways my first home - a space and life that I had created from the ground up, from the desires and images in my heart, to the colors that hang on my walls, the geeks and artists I spent my time with and the friends and lovers who have traversed my life here.

(Photo: Essequibo River, Guyana where we camped & bathed for 2 weeks)

And yet today, about 3.5 years into my Phoenix stint, I sit here at this table that

is not mine, before Life Herself yet again. I have moved on from the Art Center, my first landing and family community here (aside from my real family of course,) a place that held me as I grew and challenged me to thrive. I rent The Dollhouse (a fabulous casita snuggled in the backyard of the main house, in the eclectic hood of #Coronado) and love her very much, but have very few possessions - no car, the bike I ride is not mine, no large appliances. I have clothes, a phone and my laptop. I have a great mattress, 1 dresser, 1 couch, 2 pretty teal chairs and a table from #Target. My smaller tables & most art supplies are from my Aunt, my dishes are from #Goodwillphx, as are mostly everything of decorative purpose. I don’t own many books by choice and prefer the #phxpubliclibrary. Even though I’ve curated my space lovingly and it most definitely echoes my vibe of colorful, bright and cozy - none of it is stuff that anchors me in this city. If someone offered me a job or to house-sit for a few months in Spain or Belize or pretty much anywhere new to me, I’d be off in a heartbeat!

(Photo: Unsplash)

That Time on Mt. Washington

So, today I sit here and ask myself, “Kelly, what do you want in your life?” I dedicate 1 page per theme: Feelings, Home, Work, Friends, Leisure, Lover. And I feel and write, imagine and think. And it crosses my mind more than once that not many people have this luxury. Well, I consider it a luxury! Perhaps some would consider it frightening or some other adjective, who knows?! To be 37, no kids, no pets, no house, no partner (3 out of 4 are very intentional...the 4th is seasonal, lol!) To sit at a table and draft & craft some Life up for the next 3-5-10 years or so. To be open to all the opportunities the Universe offers me, to list and discern and choose things I desire, experiences I want, types of people and energy I seek to feel. To me, this is luxury.

But this moment of vision and serenity hasn’t come without some unrest and many months of annoyance! It’s been a long journey to arrive to this table, to my journal, to feeling calm and open to the Universe’s next plans for me. Read on...

This arises in me every few years now, since I’ve been home. I feel like I’ve landed, I settle in, get cozy and then, kinda little by little, but eventually all of the sudden I look around where I am and my eyes grow wide….

I pause, really look around, almost squinting to make sure, like, “No, it can’t be. Not yet. Not already…” That takes a good 3-4 months.

Then, I sigh and look around again, really feel into the energy of the space I’m in in my life and interiorly nod my head, as I think, “Uh-huh, yep...Alli esta….There it is...Ha llegado la hora…..It’s time.” This phase lasts another 1-2 months….

I think on it, ponder it, hold that feeling between my fingers, feel the texture of it and ask Life, “Really?! Again?! Already?!”

And, as I’m examining this situation from all angles in fits and starts, Life leads me (kicks, shoves me) right out the door because It Is fucking time, Kelly!

She ushers me into a brand new space (in all the senses) and opens the Doors of this new space so wide that the bright light actually hurts at first glance…

Like some aching pain, squinting, not seeing quite clearly, some fear, uncertainty, wanting to turn around and run back to where it’s darker, but familiar and I’m good at the stuff back there….

One thing the convent teaches you is humility….for better or worse, ha (#chapteroffaults.) It is a good virtue to possess and it has been a tool I have wielded in these moments in my life many times, a trusty friend if used wisely and, seemingly ironically, with confidence. Because humility allows me to be a novice each time, to be Ever-the-Learner, to be always open to the new. Humility allows me to be ok with not knowing everything, to be ok with being the new girl yet again, to be ok with waking up for weeks on end not knowing where you’re going to land, but trusting that you will, indeed, land, and land amazingly well because that’s what you do! Because ultimately, humility is not just relying on myself. It’s Me & The Universe. It’s trusting the shove out the door and believing the blinding light will one day actually clearly guide your path onto your next adventure and into a fuller version of yourself. Humility is like that time we (the nuns) hiked down Mt. Washington as the sun was setting, lead by only a flashlight, in the dark, wet forest, holding hands and trusting that if the sister in front of you landed her step safely, then the tiny light was all you also only needed to land safely. Humility allows for the one small step at a time, even if you don’t see the end or full picture yet, you know the Universe is showing you what you need in the moment you need it….

Also, Nature Herself is Humble, so there’s that….

Trees thrive where they’re planted.

Flowers are brilliantly radiant, yet silent.

The Ocean ebbs and flows forever without fanfare.

Birds unknowingly bring joy with their songs.

Mountains rise in splendor and ask no glory.

Gypsy Secrets

For someone who left the missionary life proper, who considers herself a homebody and most definitely a lover of the reliable routine, I find it funny that in the grand scheme of things, I actually move through life quite like a #gypsy! I’ve always been someone who leads with simplicity and doesn’t need many material items to feel happy, and I have never set an anchor in a place so deep that it forfeited my freedom to roam - a desire I’m learning is an essential part of my being. It’s a paradox of myself that I find really interesting. I will be the most reliable worker, on top of all my shit, I will work out faithfully and read daily, I eat the same things most days because I like them….and yet, every 4 years or so I will hop on a plane, take of my habit, walk out of a job and just fling myself into the Universe in this kind of radical, unconventional way (‘You’re leaving your job and you don’t have the next one lined up?!’….I’ve done this now 3x in my life quite successfully thankyouverymuch!) only to be explained by a feeling inside of me that I can no longer ignore. Or, more accurately, that no longer lets me ignore it. And so I go, I leave, I move, I reconsider, I recast dreams, I open, I sigh alot...I take that one clear step and then breathe, wondering what the next version of myself and my life will taste and feel like, grateful for the adventure and most importantly, knowing that “home” is not a place, but rather is within me, the liberating secret that every true #gypsy lives by.

#intuition #hiking #exnun #formernun #catholiclife #gypsylife #wanderlust #nomad #anchors #freedom #dwntwnphx #phxlife #nunlife #conventlife #postconvent #catholicnun #formerpriest #girlswhotravel #ponderings

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ferrybaker0-blog · 5 years

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Glitter, glam, grit

Driving down the Sunset Strip in the 1970s could be hazardous to your health. The dozens of balconies lining the Continental Hyatt House were often populated with visiting rock stars, including The Who, Rolling Stones, and Led Zeppelin. Like overstimulated toddlers, these men ran riot over the hotel.

Zeppelin band members rode a motorcycle up and down the halls, Jim Morrison hung off a 10th-floor balcony like a monkey, and orgies were an almost nightly occurrence. Oblivious to the people below, Keith Richards and Keith Moon supposedly threw TVs off the balcony, while John Bonham pelted cars with water balloons and champagne bottles.

Hotel staff had a remarkably lenient attitude toward these rock ‘n’ roll antics.

“One night we got crazy and threw a chair out the window,” Neal Doughty, REO Speedwagon pianist, told Michael Walker, author of Laurel Canyon. “Ten seconds later we got a call from the desk. All they said was, ‘Did you at least look first?’”

The Sunset Strip of the 1970s was miles away from the whimsical peace and love of the mid-1960s. The new scene was grittier, tougher, and more jaded, with a hard-edged glamour befitting the times.

In the late ’60s and early ’70s, a new spate of clubs and musical venues opened that would define the Strip for the next two decades.

These included the rock ‘n’ roll venue Gazzarri’s, where Van Halen got its start, and the Comedy Store, which opened in 1972 at Ciro’s old home. Soon, the kooky and shrewd Mitzi Shore would be playing den mother to a group of comic geniuses, including Robin Williams, Richard Pryor, and, later, Sam Kinison, and Andrew Dice Clay. In 1973, the upscale Roxy Theatre opened, backed by music industry heavyweights David Geffen, Elliot Roberts, and Lou Adler.

The venerable Whisky continued to rock, being the gold standard for new acts starting out on the Strip. Then there was the brief reign of Rodney Bingenheimer’s English Disco (first at 8171 Sunset and later at 7561 Sunset), which opened in 1972.

“The three pioneers of the Sunset Strip during the ’70s and ’80s were Bill Gazzarri, Mario Maglieri, and of course Rodney Bingenheimer, who was a very popular disc jockey on KROQ,” Sunset Strip historian and resident Alison Martino says. “He introduced bands to Los Angeles that would never have gotten their start without him.”

Through his popular radio show and the English Disco, the soft-spoken, starry-eyed Bingenheimer, known as the “Mayor of the Sunset Strip,” would bring glam and glitter rock to Los Angeles.

He would introduce the Strip to the wonders of David Bowie—and later Iggy Pop, Blondie, and New Wave acts. Inside the Disco, legendary groupies like Lori Maddox, Pamela Des Barres, and Sable Starr danced in sequin pants and halter tops, attempting to get the attention of rockers like Rod Stewart or Robert Plant. In November 1973, writer Richard Cromelin reported in the Los Angeles Times:

Once inside, everybody’s a star. The social rules are simple but rigid: All you want to hear is how fabulous you look, so you tell them how fabulous they look. You talk about how bored you are, coming here night after night, but that there’s no place else to go. If you’re not jaded, there’s something wrong. It’s good to come in very messed up on some kind of pills every once in a while, and weekend nights usually see at least one elaborate, tearful fight or breakdown.

The Disco, which included regulars like The Runaways’ Joan Jett, Lita Ford, and Cherie Currie, even enticed the King himself to find out what all the fuss was about. “Elvis Presley came in, and they I.D. him,” Martino recalls. “And he actually left his license at the front while he went in and hung out for a while… he left his license there—I think Rodney still has it.”

The scene was just as intense over at The Rainbow, a mock Tudor-style Italian restaurant with a dance floor upstairs. Opened in 1972 by Whisky impresarios Mario Maglieri and Elmer Valentine, it was financed by a group including Lou Adler and press agent Bob Gibson. The Rainbow served as what Walker calls a “round table of LA’s rock elite.” It was soon a popular hangout for the likes of John Belushi, Elton John, Ringo Starr, and John Lennon.

But not everyone was impressed with the rarified air of the Rainbow. “It is a hellish place, desperate and crowded and it means you aren’t satisfied with your friends if you have to drink with them at the Rainbow,” writer and socialite Eve Babitz wrote in Eve’s Hollywood. “It’s no fun.”

After the clubs had closed for the night, the stars and their paramours decamped to hotels like Chateau Marmont and the Continental Hyatt House, which earned its nickname as the “Riot House” with its balcony antics alone.

According to Walker, teenage waifs like Morgana Welch, part of a pack of groupies known as the “LA Queens,” spent their days in the coffee shop of the Hyatt House, waiting for their rock gods to check-in and check them out. Today, the Hyatt House is the Andaz West Hollywood. It’s still a hotel, but it’s missing its most defining feature. “When the Andaz took it over, they took out the balconies,” Martino says. “That was probably smart!”

During the ’70s, the Strip musical scene evolved from rock and glam to punk. With the dawn of the 1980s, a new musical genre was germinating on the Strip—glam metal—which would soon take over the clubs on Sunset and charts across America.

In 1981, three young punks named Vince Neil, Tommy Lee, and Nikki Sixx (who had spent part of his itinerant childhood living in the Strip’s Sunset Tower) moved into a house at 1124 North Clark Street, directly above the Strip. As members of the band Motley Crue, they were making a name for themselves on the Strip, while living in a filthy house, swarming with roaches and vermin, which became party central for the likes of David Lee Roth. Neil recalled the scene in the band’s autobiography The Dirt:

We played the Whisky, half the crowd would come back to our house and drink and do blow, smack, Percodan, quaaludes, and whatever else we could get for free… There would be members of punk-scene remnants like 45 Grave and the Circle Jerks coming to our almost nightly parties while guys in metal newborns like Ratt and W.A.S.P. spilled out into the courtyard and the street. Girls would arrive in shifts. One would be climbing out the window while another was coming in the door.

It was while playing at the Whisky one night that Motley Crue was discovered after a record scout noticed hundreds of kids waiting in line, clad in tight leather with high teased hair. The Crue was soon one of the biggest bands in America and the new kings of the Sunset Strip. “We’d get drunk, do crazy amounts of cocaine and walk the circuit in stiletto heels, stumbling all over the place,” Neil wrote. “The Sunset Strip was a cesspool of depravity.”

With the success of other hair bands like W.A.S.P., The L.A. Guns, and, later, Faster Pussycat and Poison, the Strip was soon teeming with aspiring glam rock stars and their adoring fans. Strip record stores like Licorice Pizza and Tower Records became important social gathering places for stars and teenage star-gazers alike.

“Tower Records… was where everybody went to get their records,” Martino says. “Everybody from Elton John to David Bowie to Van Halen, they were all in Tower Records. I saw all of them there, buying their own records. I remember seeing Valerie Bertinelli with her mother at Tower Records the week that ‘Jump!’ came out. They used to have on the wall all the number one singles. I remember she went up to the cover of the ‘Jump!’ 45 and turned it around to see Eddie’s face and left it that way.”

According to Martino, both Axl Rose and Slash did their time working at Tower Records before Guns N’ Roses took off, and they weren’t the only ones. “Every musician and struggling band worked at Tower Records,” she recalls. “It looked like a metal band when you walked in. The employees all looked like members of Motley Crue! They all had their own bands, and you would walk in and buy records, and they would hand you their band’s flyer and put it in your bag.”

The advertising continued into the Tower parking lot, another popular hangout. “You’d walk out from buying your records, and flyers were all over your cars—all metal bands,” Martino says. “They’re valuable now those fliers, but back then you either threw them away, or you just drove off with them on your car, and they flew off.”

Slash, Steven Adler, and Izzy Stradlin backstage before a sold out show at the Roxy in 1986.

Getty Images

The Strip followed the trends of the decade. “The ’70s were gritty,” Martino says. “Then the ’80s got very decadent.” Tattoo parlors were everywhere; Motley Crue loved their tattoo artist from Sunset Strip Tattoo so much, they brought him on tour.

On the weekends, the Strip was crowded with teenagers cruising up and down its 1.7 miles. “Headbangers would all go up and walk from Gazzarri’s. They’d walk up and down and up and down. It was like a party on the street. The ’60s was the hippie movement,” Martino says, laughing. “This was the hair band movement!”

Poison frontman Bret Michaels told Rolling Stone about the first time he and his Pennsylvania bandmates caught sight of the fabled stretch of Sunset. “When we finally pulled onto the Strip it was, ‘Holy shit!’” he recalled. “We’re driving past the Rainbow, Gazzarri’s, the Roxy, the Whisky, and there’s gotta be, like, 100,000 people walking around. And they all look like they’re in a band. For a bunch of small-town guys, that’s a lot to take in.”

Over at the venerable Rainbow, the scene had gone from the rock ‘n’ roll elite to a scene of glam metal stars and strivers. Motley Crue drummer Tommy Lee remembered:

When the clubs began to close, we’d go to the Rainbow. The place was set up like a circle, with the coolest rockers and richest deviants sitting at the center tables. Guys had to be twenty-one to come into the club, but girls could be eighteen. The guys would sit at their regular spots and the girls would walk around the ring until they were called over to someone’s empty chair... Afterward, everyone would spill out into the parking lot: Randy Rhoads, Ozzy Osbourne’s guitarist, would be hanging upside down from a tree screaming while junkies tried to score dope and everyone else tried to scam on girls.

No open space on the Strip was safe from the mayhem. “I saw so many people f*** on the lawns behind Gazzarri’s that I actually got bored of watching and started to throw empty beer cans at them,” Ratt frontman Stephen Pearcy wrote in his autobiography Sex, Drugs, Ratt & Roll: My Life in Rock.

“We’d get drunk, do crazy amounts of cocaine and walk the circuit in stiletto heels, stumbling all over the place,” Motley Crue’s lead singer wrote in the band’s biography. “The Sunset Strip was a cesspool of depravity.”

There was also violence. Hot-headed and fueled by cocaine and alcohol, rock stars like the Motley Crue guys frequently got in brutal fights in both Strip clubs and parking lots. Amid all this madness, West Hollywood, and therefore the Sunset Strip, finally became a town.

“In 1984, a coalition of gay men, Russian Jews and the elderly, spurred by the imminent expiration of L.A. County’s rent control protections, successfully held a vote to officially incorporate the area as the City of West Hollywood, electing a city council with an openly gay majority and immediately passing a series of rent control measures to protect its longtime citizens,” according to the city of West Hollywood.

The era of glam metal would be the last gasp of lawlessness on the Sunset Strip. While the tragic 1982 drug overdose of John Belushi at Chateau Marmont had done little to pause the debauchery, the advent of the grunge movement and the senseless overdose of River Phoenix in front of The Viper Room in 1993 seemed to signal the end of an era.

Over the past 30 years, the Strip has become increasingly staid and upscale as rents have gone up and big business has taken over.

“I’m afraid it’s just becoming hotel row,” Martino says. “I’m very nervous about the future of Sunset Strip. I grew up off Sunset Strip. I still live off Sunset Strip. There are many ghosts on this boulevard. And I will not go anywhere. I’ll still be here. But I don’t go as often as I used to. There’s really not a destination. On a Friday night in the 1980s it was: ‘What do you want to do?’ ‘Let’s go to the Strip!’ I don’t think anybody does that today.”

Source: https://la.curbed.com/2019/3/21/18270439/sunset-strip-motley-crue-the-roxy

#read more #see more #check it out #interesting #learn more

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uglypastels · 6 years

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When You Say Nothing At All - Tom Holland movie AU (2/3)

Part 2

(a/n) I don’t think I actually have anything to say about this...

word count: 8184

warning: swearing; mentions of divorce, infertility, the dark side of fame; sexual themes; SPOILERS FOR NOTTING HILL

part 1

Tom’s POV - 1999 - London - Characters are in their late 20′s It had easily been the most painful hour of Tom’s life. All of the actors he had met, looked at him as if he was crazy or stupid. Tom couldn’t decide which was worse. But he knew they weren’t wrong.

He walked out of the last interview he had done. It was with a young child actress that clearly already at the age of twelve had her life more put together than he would ever have. It was clearly already getting late, as the crew had started to pack up and most journalists had already left. Tom was also more than ready to leave this suite. He never wanted to come back again.

He was almost at the door when Karen’s voice sounded from the end of the hall. “Mr. Holland,” she called him out. Tom stopped in his tracks, mumbling “Oh, no” a bit too loud. He slowly turned around. Karen was looking at him brightly. “Have you got a minute?”

“No.,” he said honestly. Karen, fortunately, heard it as a joke and broke a little laugh. Defeated, Tom followed the assistant to a room, in which he surprisingly had not been in yet. He wondered how many rooms there could possibly be in this suite alone.

She opened the door for him. Tom’s face lit up with a smile at the sight in front of him. (Y/N) got up out of her chair when she saw him. Her suit jacket lay somewhere abandoned. Her long hair loose. She said a small “Hi”. The door closed behind him. He didn’t even look. They were finally alone again. Had she asked for him? Probably. Tom did his best to hide his excitement. He also responded with just a “Hi.” For some reason, (Y/N) looked nervous. He didn’t understand why. It was just him.

“Uhm… Yeah, so, the, um…” She started mumbling. It was cute, Tom thought. “The, the thing I was doing tonight. I’m not doing anymore. I told them I had to spend the evening with Britain’s premiere equestrian journalist.” She smiled.

“Oh,” Tom smiled too. “Well, great. Fantastic.” He already started to think where he could take her this evening. Of course, nothing would probably even come close to what she was used to. He barely could afford to eat himself. Dinner...oh no! He completely forgot.

“Shit. It’s my brother’s birthday. Shit.” He rolled his eyes at his own stupidity. “We’re meant to be having dinner.”

“Okay, that’s fine,” she said, not seeming to be very bothered by the fact.

“No. I’m sure I can get out of it.”

“No, I mean, if it’s fine with you, I’ll be your date.” Had he heard that correctly? Did (Y/F/N) really just suggest to be his date? He looked at her with wide eyes. “You’ll be my date to my little brother’s birthday party?”

“If it’s alright.” She looked a bit concerned. He must have sounded rude.

“Well, yeah, I’m sure it’s all right. My friend Max is cooking,” he remembered, “and he is generally acknowledged to be the worst cook in the world, but you could hide the food in your handbag or something.”

“Okay.” she genuinely seemed happy to go.

“Okay.”

Tom had asked (Y/N) if it would be okay if he picked her up at eight. She had simply nodded and then her publicist walked in, saying that she had a sudden interview in two minutes and had to get ready.

When he got back home, Tom called Bella, Max’ wife to check if it was okay if he brought a date. The party would be held at their place as it would be very likely that Max could burn down the kitchen in an attempt to cook. So it would be better if it wasn’t someone else's.

(Y/N) stood next to him as Tom rang the doorbell. She looked very casual, but still very fabulous. Her hair was up in, what he thought was called, a milkmaid braid. She was just wearing jeans and a t-shirt, over that a light jacket.

The door opened. Max had not even come up to it. Just opened it as soon as he could reach the handle, and walked away immediately after it. “Hi, come on in. Vague food crisis.” He disappeared back into the kitchen. Tom looked at (Y/N), who was in a small shock. They laughed together and stepped into the house. Tom, of course, let her walk in first.

“Hiya,” Bella said from the living room, they followed her voice. “Sorry, the guinea-fowl is proving more complicated than expected.”

“He’s cooking guinea-fowl?” Tom asked. It was a classic move for Max, to cook something he could barely even pronounce.

“Don’t even ask.” Bella rolled her eyes. Then, she noticed (Y/N). they both said hi and shook hands. Then, Bella’s eyes widened. “Good lord, you’re the spitting image of…” before she could finish, Tom said: “Bella, this is (Y/N).” he introduced his date to his friend. Bella scoffed in disbelief and answered with a “Right.”

“Okay, crisis over!” Max could be heard out of the kitchen. Bella’s eyes didn’t leave (Y/N).

“Max, this is (Y/N).” He put his hand on her back, and lead her to the kitchen, where Max was fanning away some smoke erupting from the oven with a hand towel. (Y/N) gave him her hand and said a small “hi” still remembering her entrance.

“Hello, (Y/N)...(Y/L/N).” Max seemed to be in a small state of shock, realizing whose hand it was that he was shaking. “Have some wine.” he smiled nervously.

“Thank you,” she said. Then the doorbell rang and Max, being the good host, excused himself to welcome their next guests. While he was gone, Tom thought it would be quicker if he poured the drinks. “Red or white?” he asked. She was about to answer when Tom’s brother, Patrick, walked in.

“Hi guys,” he seemed excited, probably ready to give Tom a tight hug. Then he saw (Y/N). “Holy fuck!” Tom felt like he was the one that was supposed to break the ice in this situation.

“Paddy, this is (Y/N). (Y/N), this is Paddy - Patrick. He’s my baby brother.” (Y/N) was looking at him and her expression softened when she knew what was going on, she turned around to Patrick, who was holding a hand in front of his mouth in shock. “Hi.” she smiled.

“Oh god. This is one of those key moments in life when it’s possible you can be really genuinely cool and I’m going to fail just 100%.” (Y/N) looked very confused at the younger man in front of her. “I absolutely adore you.” he took a few steps to her. “And I just think you are the most beautiful woman in the world.”

Tom looked at (Y/N) while his brother was having his little moment. She didn’t seem mad that Patrick was technically confessing his love to her, but she wasn’t very comfortable with it either.

“And I’ve believed for some time now, that we could be best friends.” Well, that was not as bad as Tom had expected. “So what do you think?” (Y/N) looked at Patrick rather flabbergasted. She mumbled a few uhh…’s before saying: “Lucky me.” She cleared her throat and remembered she had a present for him. Tom had told her that she didn’t need to bring him anything, but she had insisted.

“Happy birthday.” She handed him the small box. Patrick actually gasped. Tom wasn’t sure when the last time was that he watched his baby brother act like that. It was like he was twelve all over again.

“We’re best friends already, then.” he smiled. Then, his eyes lit up, “Marry Tom, he’s a really nice guy, then we can be siblings.” Tom laughed awkwardly. Thinking, if he would slam his head hard enough on the cupboard, would he maybe pass out? This was getting a bit too much. (Y/N) smiled politely and responded with: “I’ll think about it.”

The doorbell rang again, releasing a bit of the awkward tension in the room. Max sighed: “That’ll be Bernie.”

Bernie walked into the living room, holding some shapeless purple package, that was probably Patrick’s birthday present. Max introduced (Y/N) before Tom had the chance.

“Hello, (Y/N). Delighted to meet you.” They shook hands for a second and then Bernie immediately walked to Patrick. “Pads, happy birthday to you.” he sang. He said a quick “Hi” to Bella. Patrick looked interested at the strange package that was now in his hands. “It’s a hat,” Bernie explained. “You don’t have to wear it or anything. Hi Tom.” Bernie walked around, grabbing a handful of peanuts that were displayed on the table as a casual snack. Everyone looked at him, awaiting a moment of realization and shock about who was standing in front of him, but nothing happened.

“Hi,” Tom repeated, a bit awkwardly.

“What?” Bernie saw how everyone was looking at him. Then Max moved into action. “Wine, Bernie?” Bernie hummed a yes. Max picked up a glass from the kitchen and then pulled Tom away from the rest, to the corner of the room where all the alcohol for the night was laid out.

“You haven’t slept with her, have you?” The sudden question startled Tom a bit, almost making him burn his hand from the match his was holding.

“That is a cheap question and the answer is, of course, no comment.” they had been doing this to each other ever since they met, years ago. The answer always stayed the same, whether it was true or false.

“No comment means yes.”

“No, it doesn’t.” He looked at Max, again almost burning his fingers while he tried to light another candle.

“Do you ever masturbate?”

“Absolutely no comment.” He looked away from his friend.

“You see, it means “yes”.” Max walked away with the wine bottle. Tom followed, not being done with the conversation. They soon did change the subject, getting a bit too uncomfortable with the last one. From the corner of his eye, he saw (Y/N) talk to Bernie. He couldn’t hear what they were exactly talking about, but at a certain point, he saw Bernie widen his eyes… almost as if in horrific shock.

“Right, I think we’re ready.” Max clapped his hands. Bella and Patrick were already at the table. (Y/N) turned around from Bernie and looked down at Bella. “Bella, can you tell me where I can find…”

“Oh, sorry, yeah, yeah. It’s down the corridor on the right,” she said, understanding the problem without it being said. Patrick got up.

“I’ll show you. I’ll show you.” Tom almost choked on his drink. What was Pads doing? Before he could stop his younger brother, unfortunately, he had already walked into the corridor. (Y/N) walked behind him, smiling nervously at Tom. He smiled back, reassuring her it was gonna be fine. The moment she was in the corridor too, Bella and Max gathered around him. In a quick and hushed voice, she said: “Quickly, quickly, quickly. Talk very quickly. What are you doing here with (Y/F/N)?”

“(Y/F/N)?” Bernie said out loud, “What, the movie star?” Max and Bella tried to shush him. Bernie hit his head with the palm of his hand. “Oh god. Oh goddy God.”

“What did you say to her?” Tom asked scared. Right then, Patrick walked back in. His face almost the same color as the hideous red-orange shirt he was wearing.

“I can’t believe it. I don’t believe it. I actually walked into the loo with her.” Tom felt like he was about to faint. His brother just harassed his date, great. “I was still chatting when she started unbuttoning her jeans. She had to ask me to leave.” Max started laughing. In any different situation, Tom would have laughed too at the idiocracy of his little brother, but this was not okay.

“So you knew who she was?” Bernie asked Patrick, who was now laughing along with Max.

“Of course I did, but he didn’t!” he started to laugh at Bernie, who rolled his eyes.

“Well, not instantly, but I got away with it though.” Tom slightly started to wish he hadn’t brought her with him.

Those thoughts did slowly fade, once dinner had actually started. The guinea-fowl had not been a complete disaster. The six of them were now talking and laughing about nonsense. Max left the table momentarily to get the cake.

“So, how’s the guinea-fowl?” he asked from the kitchen. He wasn’t looking at anyone in particular, but Tom knew it was mostly intended to (Y/N). She smiled and said: “Best guinea-fowl I’ve ever tasted.” That was a bit strange of her to say, Tom thought, as he had not seen her eat the poultry and he was pretty sure that he had read somewhere that (Y/N) was vegetarian. Anyway, he appreciated it how she didn’t want to hurt his friend's feelings.

Patrick put on the horrible blue hat that Bernie had given him. It looked horrendous, but he somehow pulled it off. There were many more laughs after Max had brought out the cake and the brownie. Patrick had blown out the candles and then they talked more while popping celebratory crackers. Tom couldn’t help it but gaze over at (Y/N) from time to time, who was sitting right opposite him. She didn’t say much through the whole evening. She mostly just observed while the others held their conversations. He doubted that she had many chances in her life to just do simple things like that: sit around a table with close friends and laugh. Nothing specific on anyone’s mind, while they stuff themselves with slightly overbaked cake.

“Having you here, (Y/N), firmly establishes what I’ve long suspected, that we really are the most desperate lot of under-achievers,” Max said as he shoved another piece of brownie into his mouth. Tom agreed. “I’m not saying it’s a bad thing,” Max added. “In fact, I think it’s something we should take pride in.” He looked as Bernie handed the plate of brownies to Tom and he, in his turn, gave it to Patrick. “I’m gonna give the last brownie as a prize to the saddest act here.” He smirked. Everybody was getting a bit excited, already thinking of some sad stories in their lives, in a chance to getting that brownie… at least, that’s what Tom was doing.

“Bern?” he suggested his friend goes first. Bernie looked surprised at the call of his name. Max, Bella, and Paddy started laughing. (Y/N) had also giggled a little bit.

“Alright, alright. Well, obviously it’s me, isn’t it?” he said, almost inaudible because of the piece of brownie still in his mouth. “I mean, I work in the city in a job I don’t understand and everyone keeps getting promoted above me. I haven’t had a girlfriend since, well, since puberty.” He swallowed the rest of his brownie. “And nobody fancies me...and if these cheeks get any chubbier, they never will.” With that, he put the last piece of his own fudge brownie into his mouth.

“Please, unless I’m much mistaken, your job still pays you rather a lot of money.” Max commented once Bernie was done pitying over himself, “While Paddy here earns twenty pence a week flogging his guts out in London’s worst record store.”

“Yes!” he agreed. “And I haven’t got hair, I’ve got…this” he pointed around his head. Tom had to admit, it looked rather tragic. “And I’ve got funny looking eyes and I’m attracted to cruel women. Actually, no one would want to marry me because my balls have actually started shrinking.” everyone laughed.

“You see, it’s incredibly sad,” Max concluded.

“Yeah, but on the other hand, his best friend is (Y/F/N),” Bella added.

“That’s true. I can’t deny it. She needs me. What can I say?” Paddy smiled while taking a tug at his cigarette.

“And most of her limbs work, whereas I’m stuck in this thing day and night, in a house full of ramps.” Bella sighed. “And to add insult to serious injury, I’ve totally given up smoking, my favorite thing. And uhm…” she looked at Max, who smiled at her lovingly, “Well, the truth is, we can’t have a baby.” A silence around the table fell. Tom shared a look with (Y/N), who was sitting right next to Bella and Max.

“Oh, Belle,” Tom felt so sorry for his friend. Tears were beginning to form in her eyes.

‘C’est la vie.” she sniffed. “Still, we’re lucky in lots of ways. But surely that’s worth a brownie.” She smiled.

“Well, I don’t know.” Max leaned forward in his seat, “Look at Thomas.” Tom laughed, knowing what will come next. “Very unsuccessful professionally.”

“That’s true.” Bella and Patrick agreed. Tom hoped that (Y/N) somehow managed not to hear any of this. Although, that was very unlikely to happen. His friends continued bashing his life. “Divorced. Used to be handsome, now kind of squidgy round the edges.” Max specifically looked at (Y/N) while he said this last part. She laughed with the rest. “And absolutely certain never to hear from (Y/N) again once she’s heard that his nickname at school was Floppy.” Before Max had finished the sentence, Tom tried to stop his friend, but he only said it louder, accompanied by Bernie.

“You did. I can’t believe it, you did.” His friends laughed even louder. “Thanks very much. Thank you.” he bowed down in his seat. “Well at least I get the last brownie, right?” he was already leaning forward, trying to reach the plate, when (Y/N) stopped him: “Well, wait, what about me?” The rest stopped laughing and looked at each other, a bit surprised. Even Tom had not expected her to join in.

“I’m sorry?” Max asked, “You think you deserve the brownie?”

“Well, a shot at it at least, huh?” she looked around the table, lastly at Tom. “Right, well, you will have to prove it,” he smirked, the brownie still in his hand. “I mean, this is a very, very good brownie and I’m gonna fight for it.” She thought for a moment and then started naming a list, that was, even for Tom, a bit too long: “I’ve… been on a diet every day since I was 19, which basically means I’ve been hungry for a decade.” she laughed, giving the rest an OK to join her. “I’ve had a series of not so nice boyfriends, one of whom hit me… And every time I get my heart broken, the newspapers splash it about as though it’s entertainment.” she gave a nervous laugh, the rest didn’t. Too captivated by her sad story.

“And it’s taken two rather painful operations to get me looking like this.”

“Really?” Paddy sounded fascinated.

“Really.” (Y/N) said, pointing first at her chin, then at her nose with a sly smile. “And one day, not long from now, my looks will go, they will discover I can’t act, and I will become some sad middle-aged woman who looks a bit like someone who was famous for a while.” Her eyes were transfixed onto one of the candles that stood on the table. Bella put down her cup and looked sadly at her, so did Max. From his angle, Tom couldn’t properly see what Patrick or Bernie were doing, but from his own actions and those of his other two best friends, he could assume it was something like it. Max stroke his chin, as if in deep thought.

“No, nice try, gorgeous, but you don’t fool anyone.” She started laughing at Max.

“Pathetic effort to hog the brownie.” Tom joked. On the inside, he wasn’t very sure if it was appropriate, but she kept smiling.

Not much later, it was already getting late and it was time for Tom to take (Y/N) back to her hotel.

“Thank you for such a terrific time.” She shook hands with Max and gave him a small kiss on the cheek. Max had wanted to say that he was delighted but suddenly fell very still. “That’s a great tie.”

“Now you’re lying,” he spoke.

“Okay, it’s true. I told you I was bad at acting.” She walked over to Bella. “It was lovely to meet you.”

“And you, and you. I’ll wait until you’ve gone before I tell him you’re a vegetarian.” Bella smiled. Max, who had been re-adjusting his tie, almost choked on it when he heard his wife say this. With terror in his eyes, he apologized. (Y/N) smiled and then walked to Patrick and Bernie. “Goodnight.”

“Look, I’m so sorry about the loo thing.” Tom wished he wouldn’t bring it back up again. It was already rather uncomfortable. “I meant to leave, but I just…”

“Happy birthday.” She said before Paddy would dig a whole he couldn’t get out of. He thanked her. “Sorry, can I just,” he gripped her in a small embrace. This was a definite sign for Tom to go.

“Leave her,” Tom pulled his younger brother off of her and lead (Y/N) back to the corridor. They all said “Bye” a few more times until the door between them was definitely closed. Tom and (Y/N) were already walking away when the sound of people laughing and screaming loudly could be heard from the inside of the green house. (Y/N) started to break out laughing too.

“Sorry. They always do that when I leave the house.” Tom joked. “It’s a stupid thing. I hate it. They continued walking, in silence once the screams of his friends died down.

“Floppy, huh?” she asked curiously, looking ahead.

“It’s the hair. It’s to do with the hair,” he explained. Tom saw on her face that there was another question she wanted to ask. “Why is she in a wheelchair?”

“Because she had an accident about 18 months ago.” He looked down at the ground, not sure if his friend wanted him to tell (Y/N) her whole story. He simply kept to the very basics of it.

“And the pregnancy thing, is that to do with the accident?”

“You know, I’m not sure. I don’t think they tried for kids before, as fate would have it.” They walked on in silence. It was not exactly the silence that would be called uncomfortable, but it was not the silence that you want to keep for long. It was a silence that Tom had a need to break. Just didn’t know with what.

“Do you want to…” he started talking before the full question actually had formed in his mouth. She looked at him, waiting for Tom to finish the question. “My place is just…”

“Too complicated.” She said. There were no clear emotions in her voice or her face. Yet, still, Tom understood what she meant.

“That’s fine.” He put his hands in his pockets. Feeling a bit stupid he had asked her in the first place.

“Busy tomorrow?” She asked. He looked up at her, surprised.

“I thought you were leaving tomorrow.” they looked at each other and she smiled. “I was.”

They walked on, the streets were dark for the most part. Some bits lit up with the old lanterns and some lights coming from the houses around them. Tom was not sure how late it was. It didn’t feel past midnight, but it just as well may be already 3 in the morning.

“All these streets round here have these mysterious communal gardens in the middle of them.” He told her, while they passed a wall of bushes and hedge, separating two houses on either side. “They’re like little villages.

“Let’s go in.” She said when they were in front of the gate. It was towering above them, a big lock on eye height.

“No, that’s the point. They’re private villages. Only the people who live around the edges are allowed in.” She turned to look at him, looking a bit disappointed.

“You abide by rules like that?” She raised an eyebrow mockingly.

“I don’t, no, no, but others do.” He started walking up to the gate. “And I just do what I want.” Tom pulled at the gate. It moved around but it was still far from opening. He saw that a part of the fence which was normally covered with ivy, was a bit visible, making it hopefully easier to climb over it. “Uhm… right.” He pulled his leg up on a horizontal bar in the fence and started to pull himself up. He could already look over it when he felt his leg slip up. He could just manage to not fall on the ground. With a ground he kept his balance, mumbling a “Whoopsie-daisies.”

(Y/N) was laughing. “What did you say?” He turned around.

“Nothing.”

“Yes, you did.”

“No, I didn’t.”

She smiled knowing very well what he said: “You said whoopsie-daisies.”

“No one says whoopsie-daisies, do they? I mean unless they’re…”

“There is no “unless”. Because no one has said whoopsie-daisies for 50 years. And even then it was just little girls with blonde ringlets.” She could barely make out the words while laughing. Tom, feeling extremely embarrassed, just nodded and said: “Exactly, right.” He glanced at the gate, then at her, then at the gate again. “So here we go again.” He gripped the bars tightly and tried to pull himself. Alas, once again, he felt his legs slip and he fell against the wall of ivy that covered the rest of the iron fence. “Whoopsie-daisies,” he exclaimed as he this time really fell on the ground. (Y/N) laughed loudly at his actions.

“Yeah, well, it’s a disease. It’s a clinical thing.” He got up and turned to her. “I’m taking pills and having injections. And I’m told it won’t last long so…”

“Okay, stand aside,” she shooed him away. Tom did as she told him. “I don’t think that’s a good idea,” he said as she was eyeing down the fence. “Really, it’s quite tricky. (Y/N)... (Y/N), don’t, it’s harder than it…” She was already at the top and pulling her leg over the fence. “No, it’s not. It’s easy.” She got her second leg over it and jumped down on to the little wall next to the gate. She held onto a thick tree branch to keep her balance.

“Come on, Flopsy.” She said, looking ahead of her and leaving Tom behind the gate.

“Right. Right!” He could do it. He had to do it. He couldn’t leave (Y/N) alone in the garden. For the third time, he gripped onto the bars at the top of the fence and pulled himself up. With a groan, he managed to stay up there. Now was the really hard part. He had to manage to get over to the other side. He tried not to think about the spiked bars that were right underneath him while he pulled his leg over the fence.

“Oh, God. This could be very unpleasant.” He said to himself. He managed to get one leg over it. Now the other one and he would be there. OK. Slowly, carefully, he pulled his other leg over the fence. Then he could feel his hand slip from one of the iron bars. He swung a bit to the right, hitting his knee on the gate. He groaned in pain.

(Y/N) was standing a few feet away from him. In an open space of the garden. She was turned with her back to him.

“Now what in the world in this garden could make that ordeal worthwhile?” He said as he reached her. His knee still hurt, but he tried not to think about it. (Y/N) turned to him and kissed him. It threw him off a bit. Why did she have to kiss him everytime he wasn’t ready? Once, just once, he wanted to be the one to make her feel like that.

She pulled away before he could do anything, and smiled. Tom felt his cheeks heat up a bit. “Nice garden.” He had to keep it a bit cool. She rolled her eyes and pulled his hand as she started walking. He hadn’t even noticed when she grabbed it.

They walked around for ages. Talking about nothing and everything. They looked around, even though there was barely anything visible in the dark. Finally, they stopped in front of a wooden bench in the middle of a clearing. A lamp behind them made it possible for them to see the engraving that was added to the backrest. (Y/N) read it out loud: “For June who loved this garden, from Joseph who always sat beside her.” underneath that, stood: June Wetherby 1917 - 1992, with a shamrock. She looked at it amazed, while Tom couldn’t keep his eyes from her. She looked so beautiful in the night light. The one street light illuminating her profile and making her eyes sparkle.

“Some people do spend their whole lives together.” she gasped and sat down on the bench. She looked at the sky. There weren’t many stars visible, due to the clouds and light pollution in general. Tom stood there, a few feet away from the bench. His legs started to move backward. It felt like she wanted to be alone.

“Come and sit with me.” She said. He did exactly that.

The next morning, Tom woke up late. He was supposed to meet (Y/N) at the movies and he couldn’t find his glasses anywhere. He had gotten out of the shower, he ran around the flat looking for them. Water still dripping off of him while he tried to hold on to the towel around his waist.

“Have you seen my glasses?” He asked Harrison, who lay half awake on the couch, his feet on the table in front of him. He hummed out: “No, afraid not.”

“Big, big bollocks.” he looked at the bookshelf, “Average day, my glasses are everywhere. Everywhere I look there’s a pair of glasses. But when I want to go to the cinema they’ve vanished.” He turned over pillows and threw some clothes around. “It’s one of life’s real cruelties.”

“That’s compared to, like, earthquakes in the Far East or testicular cancer, is it?” Harrison said, not looking up from his paper. Tom wanted to comment on his flatmate's sentence, but when he looked up his eyes caught a glance at the clock on the desk.

“Oh shit, is that the time?” He ran upstairs to get dressed. When he ran back down, he yelled out to Harrison: “Thanks for all your help on the glasses thing.”

“Oh, you’re welcome,” he said, still not looking up from the article he was reading. “Did you find them?”

“Sort of.” Tom groaned as he couldn’t find the sleeve of his jacket.

“Great.”

He only had one other option, except for going to see the movie half blind. So, when the movie started and the lights went off, he put on his diving goggles. (Y/N) almost started crying from laughter when she looked at him. He didn’t mind. He knew he looked like a twat.

During the movie, she would keep throwing popcorn at his face, scaring him every time as he couldn’t see her because of the goggles blocking most of his peripheral vision.

After the movie, they went to a sushi restaurant. It was an average dinner time, so the place was quite packed. Every table was occupied with people talking and laughing. Including the one where Tom and (Y/N) were seated. They had a table at the window. There wasn’t much of a view except for the plants growing outside. They had been talking about their own lives. Just getting to know each other a bit better.

“So who left who?” she asked him. Somehow they managed to land on the topic of his tragic divorce. Normally he didn’t like to talk about it but he felt comfortable around her. “Er - she left me.”

“Why?” she stirred the drink in her hand. Tom had to think about how to make his story less pathetic.

“She saw through me.” he smiled a lightly. She brought her glass to her lips. “Oh-oh, that’s not good.”

A laughter from behind them broke out. There was a table with a couple of businessmen. They all looked to Tom as neither could pronounce any of the dishes that they were currently eating. Their laughter getting louder and more obnoxious.

“You can give me (Y/F/N) any day.” One of them said. (Y/N) raised an eyebrow as she listened to what the man had to say. There was a small wall between their tables so the man couldn’t see her or Tom.

“I didn’t like her last film.” Another one commented. “Fell asleep as soon as the lights went down.” She gave Tom a look of “fair enough”.

“I don’t really care what the film’s like.” the first guy said. “Any film with her in, it’s fine by me.” The man laughed. (Y/N) smiled. A third man added to the conversation: “She’s not my type at all. I prefer the other one. You know, blonde, sweet looking. You know, what’s her name? Has an orgasm every time you take her out for a cup of coffee.” (Y/N) mouthed the words “Meg Ryan” to Tom just as the man at the next table said it too in a chorus.

“No, she’s too wholesome.” the first one talked again. “You see, the point about Miss (Y/L/N) is she’s got that twinkle in her eye.” She gave Tom a seductive look with a wink and smirked, then started laughing. The conversation of the men at the next table continued: “Probably drug0induced. Spends most of her life in bloody rehab.” She rolled her eyes.

“Well, whatever. She’s so clearly up for it.” (Y/N) the smile disappeared from her face. She listened in concentration to what they had to say about her. “I mean, you see, most girls, they’re all like, “stay away chum”. But (Y/N)...” he made a disgusting sound. “She is absolutely gagging for it.” Tom saw her getting a bit uncomfortable. He wanted to do something about it. Those guys were being extreme dicks.

“Do you know that in over 50% of languages, the word for “actress” is the same as the word for ‘prostitute’?” They started laughing. One of them asked where his friend got that “fact” from.

“And (Y/N) is your definitive actress,” the same guy said it, with his mouth full.

“Right, that’s it. Sorry.” Tom got up, now really sick of it. His heart was raging with anger. Who did they think they were, talking like that about another person. About (Y/N). The sweetest, most beautiful woman he had ever met. She tried to stop him, but it didn’t work. He walked up to the table of dicks while they were enjoying another of their vulgar comments about the girl that was sitting just a table away from them.

“Sorry, sorry to disturb you guys, but…” they looked up at Tom, still laughing. One of them, the one who had made most of the remarks asked: “Can I help?”

“Well, yeah,” Tom said. “I wish I hadn’t overheard your conversation, but I...I did. And, I just think, you know the person you’re talking about is a real person and I think she probably deserves a little bit more consideration rather than having jerks like you drooling over her.” he didn’t want to pull her into it. He could handle it himself.

The guy in front of him scoffed. “Oh, sod off, mate. What are you, her dad?” they all started laughing obnoxiously again. Tom wanted to say that he was her boyfriend, in fact. But was he? They’ve only been on two dates, one including his brothers birthday party one night ago. You wouldn’t call it a relationship really. Before he could come back with a remark, he could feel her tug at his arm, pulling him backward.

“I’m sorry,” Tom said embarrassed at his failure to defend her.

“No, I love that you tried.” Ow, that hurt. “Time was I’d have done the same thing. In fact…” They had been walking to the exit when she stopped. She put on a smile on her face and walked back, straight to the table of jerks. Tom followed her but stayed in the distance as she neared the table. “Hi,” she said. Tom couldn’t see her face, but the expressions on the guys’ faces were priceless. The color of their faces vanished as they looked up at her.

“Oh my God!” said the most obnoxious one of all.

“I just wanted to apologize for my friend. He’s very sensitive.” The guy shot up, his chopsticks held on to a piece of fish that were on the verge of falling to the ground and he held his pint in a way that it could spill if he only moved his hand by a millimeter. He stammered something that could be a start to an apology. (Y/N) stopped him. “No, no, no, leave it. I’m sure you didn’t mean any harm. I’m sure it was just friendly banter… I’m sure you guys have dicks the size of peanuts.” She added the last part through gritted teeth, probably still trying to smile. “Enjoy your dinner. The tuna’s are really good.” and she turned around. Tom walked after her, giving the guys one last look. They still looked paralyzed as they watched her walk away.

“I shouldn’t have done that. I shouldn’t have done that,” she repeated it all the way up to the entrance of the Ritz.

“No, you were brilliant,” Tom assured her.

“I’m rash and I am stupid.” she laughed at herself, “What am I doing with you?” she looked him in the eyes.

“I don’t know, I’m afraid.” He really didn’t. How had he managed to convince the amazing (Y/N) to go out on a date with him? It was a miracle.

“I don’t either.” They reached the entrance of the hotel. (Y/N) looked inside and then at Tom again. “Here we are.”

“Yes.” He didn’t know what to do. “Well, look…”

“Do you wanna come up?” she asked.

“Well, there seem to be lots of reasons why I shouldn’t, so…”

“There are lots of reasons.” she agreed. “Do you wanna come up?” Tom simply nodded. “Give me five minutes.” She walked away with a smirk. When she disappeared behind the door, Tom leaned against the wall. This was really happening. He would go up to her room. Where they would be alone. And, possibly, kiss…

Four minutes and thirty seconds later, Tom walked inside. He got into the elevator, pressed the same number three button he did last time and the doors closed. When they opened again he was on the third floor. Immediately taking a turn to the right, he walked on. This time there were no journalists. No interviews. It would just be him and her. He knocked on the door.

(Y/N) opened. They said hi. Tom walked up to her to kiss her, but she had moved slightly, causing his lips to land on her cheek. He wasn’t mad. “To be able to do that is such a wonderful feeling.” He confessed with a smile.

“You’ve got to go,” she whispered.

“Why?”

“Because my boyfriend, who was in America, is, in fact, now in the next room.” She pointed to the wall next to her.

“Boyfriend?” Tom didn’t understand. He thought he was the boyfriend. Or, at least, possibly on his way there. Was it too bold of an assumption?

“Yes.” She wanted to explain but as if on cue a voice from the other room called: “Hey, baby, who is it?”

“It’s a…” (Y/N) didn’t manage to mumble out much. Out of the next room, walked out a man, who Tom couldn’t help but think that he would fit perfectly around the jerks from the restaurant. He looked at Tom suspecting.

“Uh… Room service.” Tom improvised.

“Oh. How are you doing?” he smiled. Tom had to admit, the man looked a mess. “I thought you guys always wore those penguin coats?” he joked. Tom had to go along.

“Usually we do. But I was just changed to go home. And..uhm… then I thought I’d take this final call.”

“Oh, great. If you don’t mind, I would like something, too.” He was unbuttoning the cuffs of his shirt. “Could you bring me up some really, really cold water?”

Tom barely heard the words, still confused about the whole situation. She had a boyfriend. Who was standing right in front of him? Blankly, he said: “I’ll see what I can do.”

“Still, not sparkling.”

“Absolutely, Ice-cold still water.”

He removed the dress shirt, under which he had a normal grey t-shirt. “Unless, of course, it’s illegal in the UK to serve beverages below room temperature. I wouldn’t want you going to jail just to satisfy my whim, now.” he joked. Tom didn’t exactly understand it, but smiled.

“No, I’m sure it’s fine.”

“Thanks.” he left to the bathroom. (Y/N) looked at Tom and was about to say something when her boyfriend came back. “Hey, one more thing, if you don’t mind, could you adiós those dirty dishes and take out the trash, too?” Tom was sure that under any other circumstance, he would be a really great guy, but now he just seemed like a huge dick. As if in trance, Tom stepped in and went over to the table where the plates lay. (Y/N) tried to push him back.

“No. No. Don’t do that. I don’t think it’s his job to clear.” she explained to her boyfriend who looked at her weirdly.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I’m sorry. What’s your name, man?” Tom couldn’t think of his own name. Completely blanking on everything… maybe he was having a seizure? Yes! And these were all some cruel hallucinations. That must be it. Tom just said the first name that popped into his brain: “Bernie.”

“Oh, listen, Bernie, thank you, I really appreciate it.” the man pulled out a note and put it in Tom’s hand. He didn’t see how much it was. Then, he went over and kissed her. Right in front of Tom. The audacity to pull her in so close, just like Tom wanted to do ever since he met her. He pulled away.

“So, tell me, tell me, tell me. Good surprise or nasty surprise?” She stared at him, definitely surprised, then said: “Good surprise.”

“Oh, you’re such a liar.” he shook his head excited. He turned to Tom to tell him that “She hates surprises.” How funny, Tom thought, he hates them too. “Hey, what are you gonna order?”

“Huh?” she looked confused at her boyfriend, who suddenly was jumping with energy.

“From him,” he pointed at Tom, “What are you gonna order?”

“Oh, uhm… I haven’t decided yet.” She confessed.

“Well, don’t overdo it.” he walked away to the bathroom. “I don’t want people saying, there goes that famous actor the big fat girlfriend.” If Tom wasn’t scared of him hitting him back, he would have punched the shit out the guy.

“I should leave,” he whispered when the bathroom door closed. (Y/N) looked at him with broken eyes. He picked up the dirty plates and the waste bucket. (Y/N) rushed her hand through her hair, clearly feeling nervous and uncomfortable. Tom wanted to make her feel better, but it wasn’t his place to do so. Not with her boyfriend in the room next door. “This is a fairly strange reality to be faced with.” he sighed.

“I’m so sorry,” she whispered, her words were getting a bit stuck in her throat. “I don’t… know what to say.”

“Well,” he looked away for a second, “I think goodbye is traditional.” he hated goodbyes. He hated traditional. Especially both together, if it had to do with her. In her eyes, he could see she was thinking the same.

(Y/N) walked him out, apologizing once more. Tom walked down the empty corridor, now feeling much colder than when he was walking there before. He left the plates in front of another room, knowing that the actual room service would clean it when they saw it.

Finally, outside, he was met with fresh air, but he still couldn’t breathe. He started walking wherever his legs were taking him, which was apparently the bus stop. The red vehicle didn’t come much later. Of course, it was one of those that promoted the HELIX movie. Her beautiful face right in the middle of it.

Tom stepped inside, paid for a ticket and then walked all the way to the back. There were other places for him to sit, but he felt like the last row would be isolating, very fitting to his current situation and feeling.

Once he got home all he wanted to do was fall into his bed and fall asleep, hopefully never to wake up again. But he couldn’t even close his eyes. He lay wide awake for at least an hour. He wondered what he could do to get the sleep to hit his brain. He knew that there was a movie theatre not far from the flat which had late screenings. Maybe there was something.

There was definitely something. Unfortunately, the only movie that still had tickets available was HELIX. Tom had no other choice. He purchased the ticket and went inside. There weren’t many people in the small room.

He wanted to hate it. He wanted to hate her. But his heart wouldn’t let him. She still looked as beautiful as she did yesterday, before all of that in the hotel room happened, before the boyfriend. Tom watched (Y/N) walk in slow-motion. Her space suit shiny from all the touch ups the editors had made to the film. He watched her stop in the middle of the hall of the space station and put on her helmet. He listened to her saying her lines, but nothing stuck. He couldn’t concentrate on anything.

“Come on. Open up.” Harrison was sitting opposite of him on the sofa. “This is me. Hazza.” He made some sad jazz-hands. It somehow made Tom chuckle a bit.

“I’m in contact with some quite important spiritual vibrations. Come on. Hit me with it.” Tom looked at his flatmate. Not really sure if he was the person who he should tell this to. But Harrison was the only person there and Tom at least hoped he could trust him a little bit. He took a deep breath before talking.

“There’s this girl.”

“Aha.” Harrison nodded along. “See, I’d been getting a female vibe. Good. Speak on, dear friend.”

“Er- she’s someone who… can’t be mine.” Tom stared into his cup of now cold tea. “And it’s as if I’ve taken love heroin and now I can’t ever have it again.” he laughed at his stupid analogy. “I’ve opened Pandora’s Box and there’s this trouble inside.”

Harrison leaned back. “Hmmm, yeah. Tricky. Tricky.” He talked very slowly. “I knew a girl at school called Pandora.” Tom wasn’t sure where that came from or what it had to do with anything he had just said.

“Never got to see her box though.” Harrison giggled idiotically.

“Right. Right, thanks, that’s very helpful.” Harrison kept on giggling.

“You didn’t know she had a boyfriend?” Max asked. Together with Bella, Paddy, and Bernie, they were eating dinner at Tony’s new restaurant. It had been open for a few weeks already and they were, with the exception of two others, the only diners there that night.

“No. No. Why, did you?” he looked up from his food. Had his best friends known and not told him? Max didn’t respond, just raised an eyebrow to Bernie and continued eating his soup. “Oh, bloody hell. I don’t believe it. My whole life ruined because I don’t read Hello! magazine.”

“Let’s face facts. This was always a no-win situation. Y/N)’s a goddess.” Tom definitely agreed with that. “You know what happens to mortals who get involved with the gods.”

“Buggered, is it?”

“Every time.” he smiled to Tom weakly. “But don’t despair, I think I have the solution to your problems.” Tom wasn’t so sure about that.

“Really?”

Max nodded proudly, straightened the napkin on his lap and announced: “Her name is Tessa, and she works in the contracts department.” Tom laughed at the idea of a blind date. So did the rest of his friends. “The hair I admit is unfashionably frizzy. But she’s bright as a button, and kisses like a nymphomaniac on death row.” Bella stopped laughing and looked Max dead in the eyes. “Apparently.” He added quickly, too scared of his wife.

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