lol i'm seriously considering giving camp keshet a complete overhaul AGAIN... like y'know how it used to be universally bird-themed? and then i scrapped that when i made the theme flight generally speaking, thereby making each character's theme individual to their personal interests? and now i want to make it universally butterfly-themed???? like goodness gracious i need to stop

still unwell over the prospect of Howdy slowly putting the pieces together and having a complete mental breakdown over it. Laughingstock edition!

having thoughts about how Husk actually has very little left to redeem bc he started his journey of self-change before even coming to work at the hotel, but at the same time redemption isn't even his goal- he ain't even aiming for heaven, he just wanted to be a better person and maybe now with friends and especially Angel, who he supports so much and wants to see succeed, maybe now he has a reason to be a better person

sometimes when i find myself getting too into the weeds on gender issues i find myself feeling weird and bad about myself and going 'whats wrong with me. am i not a man' and then i remember that duh. of course im not a man. despite touting the FTM and transmasc labels i am thoroughly nonbinary. 'they' is the first pronoun i have listed in my bio for a reason

a couple of days ago i finished the spanish duolingo course so after some back and forth, i started on french, and not to repeat myself but it really is wild how much you subconsciously keep of a language if you ever engaged with it at all. like. i had three years of french at school which was literally over a decade ago, but between that and my latin and spanish, it's just coming back SO easily. the language brain is just WILD. my most beloved

Size difference.png (Patreon)

'kay so I doodled another thing before bed, just to test the tool further. I wanted to see what I could do if I went beyond just a sketch with a bit of color slapped onto it. Not gonna lie after fiddling witth the brushes further I was a bit dissapointed - they're not unworkable, but the limitations are frustrating nonetheless. I ended up doing the lineart as though I was working with a mechanical pencil - set the brush size to being as thin as possible(i worked on a 800x600 pixel canvas here, for the record) and then just sorta went over the parts I wanted to be bolder several times. It didn't turn out great but that's more of a skill issue on my part.

All this isn't to say that's it's bad, for the record, the main goal of the people making this was clearly to make something for people to have fun together with and not a perfect clone of [insert your preffered drawing program here]. If I experimented further I could definitely figure out plenty of interesting things that can be done with just the free features, I just don't have the time or the patience tonight.

the problem with exclusively having hobbies that involve staring at a screen is that you can recognise that there is a problem and The Screens are probably making your mental health worse but when you decide to do something against that by not doing one of your screen hobbies your brain just starts fucking eating itself from the inside out and you end up feeling like absolute dogshit

HEY

I keep almost writing Lua instead of Luna/moon and Infestation instead of Hive. maybe playing Warframe and writing Destiny fanfic at the same time isnt my greatest idea (i refuse to stop)

On another note, Chains of Harrow has inspired me to torment Rancher and his gaggle of Hunters (F for his sanity) but we'll see if this actually goes anywhere/if its another drabble to chip at between Arsenal Check and Stormjoys...

rip alicent hightower u would've loved adam parrish.....

A controversial thought just occurred to me that I've tried to put into words many times now about my hero (Janis Joplin) and other musicians and people who died "tragically" (especially in a "self-inflicted" way), and that is: every time I see someone online, on Youtube or Facebook or wherever, say something (always unprompted/unrelated to what the video/photo/article/etc. is about) along the lines of, "What a waste of their talent/skill their death was," I think, What a waste their death was? What have you said of their life? Why do you only choose to comment on, and apparently highlight, their death? Did their life, and their accomplishments, and what they brought to the world while they were alive mean nothing to you? Have you not a SHRED of gratitude that they were alive at all?

I am quite sure that there is some sort of psychological explanation (and I say that with the confidence of only having a basic understanding of psychology) for why people focus particularly on people's (in this case, celebrities') "tragic" deaths, but is it not a tragedy in itself to reduce those people's lives to their deaths and the fact that they're dead? Why not appreciate what they were able to share with us while they were here? You know?

huh, it's not really all that fun to look up and realize that actually you've been quite depressed for several months, is it

i got very lucky to meet the people i've met in my life i think.

forever thinking about how mirror kirby in super star looks just like marx and how marx’s scales look like mirror shards and how he’s clearly meant to resemble kirby despite not being the same species and how kirby in the anime (verified by sakurai himself who worked on super star) is literally called the mirror of all the foes he faces.

((The easiest way to con me into picking up a new muse is to make me think about them and come up with hcs bc then I'll sit there and think: all this thinking... it would be a waste to not write them out, right?

Me staring at Iemitsu and Cervello like hm... been a while since I picked up a muse I dislike but considered picking up for plot.

Edit: or the- "hey Neo can you please try picking up [insert character here]"))