#higgs x reader
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Imagine getting a phone call late at night that wakes you up out of a deep sleep. You're only barely awake as you groggily murmur "hello" into your cuff, forearm now over your eyes to block out the light. You can't work out what's going on at first until you hear his voice, strained and panting lightly. Whispering and grunting the filthiest of things. The sound of skin on skin loud in your ear as you listen quietly.
#church of higgs#higgs monaghan#death stranding#seshat writes#higgs x reader#still not 100% but i'm not half dead anymore so here I am!
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Play Pretend | Higgs Monaghan x GN!Reader
a/n: just a lil thing i kept meaning to post, nothing meaningful i just keep thinking about him 🥺
warnings: TW: allusions to self harm, allusions of suicide. higgs being a dick like always.
summary: You’re in it for something, he concluded. He needs help, you thought, more than he’s willing to take.
The fire that warmed your hands crackled softly, the cold breeze gently nipped at your ears and nose. You took a bite out of the lukewarm chicken that Higgs had managed to scrounge up, cook, and not actually burn. Your eyes didn’t dare glance away from the sight before you, the once highly feared man was now reduced to a man barely surviving. It was honestly a sight; his clean shave was now a dark scruffy beard, his usually short hair was now growing out and becoming wavy. You knew it was hard on him since you were an independent Porter and he couldn’t go and rest where you would, but it did give him a good shock not being able to be in control of everything.
Today was the day before you were able to finally go to your new shelter and finally be able to get Higgs into a real place.
“You’re starin’, sugarplum.”
You blinked quickly before giving him a soft smile. “Sorry, just zoned out.”
He answered with a grunt before beginning to devour the other chicken wing, and you couldn’t help but gaze at him from across the fire. If you had just met the man, you would’ve thought he was just a lost person from one of the Knot Cities; he looked harmless with that blank stare in his eyes. Barely spoke a word when you finally found him in front of the Middle Knot Ruins, you could’ve sworn that he was trying to get hung upside down by the BTs.
You looked down and took another bite, then looked back up to Higgs, who met your gaze with furrowed eyebrows. “Why are you starin’ at me for?”
“You just look very beautiful in this lighting.” You said and even though the fire had a warm glow, you could see his entire face flush red. He immediately looked down at his food and continued to eat and so did you, that inkling of doubt in your stomach for complimenting him was becoming bigger.
“Don’t compliment me.” He answered after a few more moments of silence; He chucked the empty bone into the fire, staring at it. “I don’t deserve sympathy.”
He tossed another bone into the fire and you decided to stay quiet. Time went by quickly, almost five minutes passed before he spoke again.
“You shouldn’t care about me.”
“I know.”
“Can’t you-“ He threw a bone at your head, it barely even grazed your hair as you looked at him. His face flushed red with anger, his body tensing, “-fucking hate me? Yell or something?”
You let out a breath, eyes boring into the stormy seas of Higgs’ own eyes. He was looking desperately for something to exploit, to gain leverage - there wasn’t anything he hasn’t used.
“Pass me the salt packet.”
The damn thing was stuck. All of these credits poured into this brand-new shelter and the terminal was stuck in the floor.
Higgs stood off to the side in the overhang, the heavy timefall thundered upon the cold mud outside. Your foot hit the floor again, hands in your pockets as you just kept kicking the damn thing. The man looked towards the timefall again, watching as the trees swayed in the strong winds; he took a step further into the shelter. The timefall looked peaceful to him - no matter how hard it was raining, he considered the timefall to be an ideal death. Suffering until the rain decided he needed to return to the Earth - he deserved to suffer.
His daddy was always right, Higgs concluded. The outside world was out to kill him, the timefall would wash him away, that he deserved to suffer for even breathing. He only turned away, looking to you as you moved backwards from the circle in the floor.
He was still trying to figure you out - no one gave pity without knowing they’ll receive something in return. You wanted something from him, he felt it in his bones; but he had nothing to give. Amelie had taken his power, his fire, his will to even stand, all of the friends he had once hate him now or have died by his hand. He had no possessions, no credits - what were you in it for?
“Finally.” You muttered as the terminal popped up from the floor. Placing your cuff link underneath the scanner, the menu popped up and Higgs looked back to the outside world. He deserved to sit under Timefall and wither away. Maybe flowers would grow from his corpse, only to wither a moment later - maybe cause a voidout. He’d love to finally end it, to finally be able to be at peace.
Higgs almost walked into the downpour if it wasn’t for your arm slithering around his own, pulling him downstairs. His gaze moved from the outside world to a tiny prison. You pulled him with you - not ahead, behind. Beside you. Like he deserved to live here.
Higgs has never wanted to blow his brains out this much until now.
But he held his tongue as he was pulled around, you flicked on the lights with a button on your cuff link hologram. He made a quick glance around the place, deciding very quickly that he wasn’t meant to be here.
“Get out of your head.”
You pulled him forward and down the hall, Higgs gave some resistance but quickly followed. Flicking on the light, you pulled him into the small bedroom and turned to look at him again.
“Sleep.”
You moved right past him, now standing outside of the room while still watching him. He gazed around the BRIDGES-style private room, condensed into a small room. He set down his dufflebag onto the floor before looking back at you.
If you weren’t still angered about the terminal upstairs, you would have sworn to God that he looked to you for guidance.
“You’ll be safe here.”
He huffed out a laugh.
“I’ll never be safe as long as I breathe, sugar.”
Copyright © 2023 lethalchiralium. All rights reserved.
#lethalchiralium#lethal chiralium#death stranding#higgs monaghan#higgs x reader#higgs monaghan x neutral!reader#higgs monaghan x reader#higgs monaghan oneshot
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incorrect higgs x reader quotes
y/n: i owe you one.
higgs: that’s ok. you can just date me and we’ll call it even
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y/n: *angrily presses higgs against a wall* WHERE'S MY BB?!
higgs: …
higgs: are we about to kiss?
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higgs: you fuckers don’t know about my knife stick. it’s knife taped to a stick and it’s the ultimate weapon.
y/n, not looking up from their book: spear.
higgs: BLOCKED
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higgs: do you know why i called you in here?
y/n: because i accidentally sent you a tit pic.
higgs: *stops pouring two glasses of wine* accidentally?
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y/n: bro-
higgs: no no, hold up, rewind
higgs: my tongue was literally down your throat just a second ago and now you’re calling me bro?!
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y/n: i hate you.
higgs: according to the picture i drew of us holding hands that must be untrue
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higgs: must be hard not being able to laugh
y/n: i do have a sense of humour you know.
higgs: i’ve never heard you laugh before
y/n: i’ve never heard you say something funny.
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higgs: they say love is an uninvited guest
y/n: is that why you barge into my shower without permission?
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higgs icons !!!
#yuyu icons !! 💌💭🌷#higgs#higgs icons#higgs ff#death stranding icons#death stranding higgs#death stranding game#death stranding#hideo kojima#black icons#troy baker#troy baker icons#higgs x reader#sam death stranding#dark icons#aesthetic#higgs layout#gif#video#impoeticbeauty
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You could hear his breathing in the silent office, a calm, soothing sound even as your fingers worked gently to clean and dress his wound. You weren’t sure how he was so calm in this situation, it hadn’t been minor. “Oh Pete,” you had quietly admonished him when he walked into your office, even as you felt a rising warmth in your body at the thought of him always returning to you for aid, his boyish grin lighting up the room. As you focused on the final steps, hands working on their own, you were acutely aware of the way his lashes framed his blue eyes, the way he absentmindedly moistened his lips with his tongue, the way his fingers drummed on his thigh as he sat patiently. You can tell when his eyes dart over to yours, and you catch his gaze, his eyes getting that iconic crinkle around them as he smiles quietly, keeping his secrets to himself. It takes all of your will power to silence your rapidly beating heart now drumming in your chest. The two of you were away in a quiet bubble, away from the rest of the world, away from the rest of the employees in his company. You were alone, together.
There were no words to describe the elation you felt each time he came to you, the fleeting moments you got to be near him, feel his warmth radiating off of him, the warm scent of his cologne permeating your senses, feel his scarred skin under your fingertips. It was enough to keep you craving the next moment. You wanted nothing more than to have this same moment under different circumstances, one where he wasn’t in need of aid from some MULE attack, or a slip on a rocky cliff. It was enough to drive you to tears after he’d leave, the silence screaming in your ears as his absence became painfully obvious. But for now, he was here, inches away from your beating heart as you patched him up again.
As you finish up, your hands limply rest in your lap as you wait for him to leave you once more. He hesitates, and you notice the way his lips part for a moment, the way his throat moves as he swallows heavily, the way his bright eyes look at you earnestly. Anticipation burns within you, but he thinks better of what he was going to say, and murmurs a soft thanks. He gets up and leaves, the color and energy he brought with him leaving as well, leaving you with your hands clenching the fabric of your outfit, shoulders trembling as you fight back tears. You ached for him, longed for him as you got to know him all those years working for him. There was an inherent need to be close to him that you couldn’t describe or explain. Everything about him drew you in, welcomed you, brought life to you, yet time and time again, you let him slip away. You knew he was the one, even if it was a sentiment you didn’t truly believe in. He was different.
And it was this state of emotional anguish that you were in when you felt a gentle hand on your shoulder, soft hesitation holding it back, and you know it’s him, it’s always him. It has always been him. You turn to meet his eyes, and your heart races as you catch his gaze, the way his eyes soften as he smiles down at you, and he kisses you. Soft and passionately, hungry and longing and all the million little things going through your head all fade until they’re focused on one thing. The way he feels against you. The way his hands bring you in close. The heat from his body, the scruff of his beard, the way his cologne permeates your mind.
All of it is him. And all of it will always be him.
#sorry blanked out for a moment and wrote some soft Peter/Higgs content#death stranding#higgs monaghan#Peter englert#Higgs Monaghan au#Higgs x reader#gender neutral reader#my writing
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Higgs. Reader. Fluff. Cute. Soft. uwu. Need cute soft tender feels. Make me wanna puke with the cuteness. This prompt: in a moment where stress and anxiety are running high, the sender tries to ground the receiver by gently guiding them into a hug, resting their foreheads together to steady them.
(Also, please and thank you very much, long time no see 😂)
@astrandofgold bitch I sees you on twitter 😂 BUT VISIT ME MORE ON HERE GOD DAMN IT! Haha! Coming up!
Y/N panted heavily on their hands and knees. Tears brimmed the corners of their eyes as they gasped. A series of curses escaping their throat as they tried to stabilize themselves. The shock of a BT almost succeeding in killing them had Y/N a mess. All the hairs on their body stood, and their nerves fired up as if they had already been obliterated by the dark. Y/N was beyond petrified as they attempted to pull it together, but to no avail.
"Hey," A deep voice broke through the ringing in Y/N's ears. They swallowed, tensing up as a pair of hands reached for their shoulders.
"What the hell are you doin' out here darlin'?" The gloved fingertips slowly made their way towards Y/N's face and gently pulled their chin up. Coming face to face with a familiar set of blue eyes.
"Higgs?" Y/N breathed out, surprised that he was out in the middle of a BT infested area. At first Y/N thought him to be a hallucination, but the touch to their face as he tucked a strand of hair behind Y/N's ear had them second guessing. Whatever the case or his reasons, Y/N was grateful to Higgs for showing up.
"Higgs--I can't move. I can't, I'm too scared--the BT almost," Y/N breathed out, their shoulders tensing as hushed murmurs escaped his throat. His arms snaked around Y/N's trembling form, pulling them into a tight embrace. One that radiated with care and a sense of protection.
"Shh, shh, I gotcha." Higgs murmured against the skin of Y/N's forehead. He was gently rocking them back and forth. Much like he had done for fellow porters in the past when he himself was one. Before he became a terrorist. Something Y/N remained unaware of.
"Steady, steady. Alright?" Higgs whispered, his forehead pressing to Y/N's as he watched them close their eyes tight. Their breathing attempting to sync with his own. He could recall when he was a kid, how he had gotten close to BTs and his body reacted violently with panic. As much as he tried to hide it, Higgs's heart went out to Y/N. Understanding very well what they were going through.
"Ya'll got the case of the BT Shock. It'll pass, I promise. C'mon, 'lets get you outta here before those ugly bastards show up again." Higgs coaxed Y/N to rise on their feet. His arms and hands supporting them as Y/N shivered. They leaned against him, hands grasping where they could for fear that if Higgs had slipped away, they too would perish.
Out of the way, and now residing in a safe house, Higgs held Y/N tightly to his chest as they sat on the edge of a bed. He swallowed nervously. Not used to affectionate touch in the slightest. He felt his body wanting to retreat out of self preservation, yet he remained. His forehead once again nuzzled and pressed to Y/N's.
Higgs hated this. The effect one person had on him. How they got under his skin and had him giving a shit. Second guessing everything he had worked hard to accomplish on behalf of his EE, his goddess.
"I ain't lettin' her harm you." Higgs murmured.
Y/N was unsure what he meant by his statement. A tremor ran down through their spine at how serious Higgs's tone was. Nevertheless, it didn't matter. Y/N felt safe again.
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#drabbles#higgs monaghan#higgs#ds higgs#death stranding higgs#higgs x reader#reader x higgs#death stranding#death stranding fandom#hope you like it!#man i haven't written this dude in a long time#forgot how fun he is!
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Sacrifices
One day I might actually be able to write things in the order they're supposed to go, but for now, I'm just writing the moments that pop into my head.
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In the darkness behind his eyelids, all he could hear was the crunch of sand under a pair of patent leather pumps as they slowly circled around him. His angel of calamity, silently appraising him as he knealt on the beach, waiting for her direction. He was suprised when instead she asked him a question.
"Where do you go?" Her tone implied curiosity, though something a little darker seemed to lurk beneath. He ignored it.
"I'm just lookin' around, checkin' on Sam, keepin' things in motion." He gazed at her beautiful face as she stood over him, her brow knit in what seemed like disappointment. Lowering herself, she took his chin in her hand. The smile that curved her lips did not reach her eyes.
"Liar."
It felt as though he was being pushed deeper into the sand by the weight of her gaze. Clearing his throat, he lowered his head. "They've got nothing to do with this-"
A soft scoff left her lips. Her hand dropped from his chin and she stood, pacing a few steps away before turning back to face him, her disappointment now clearly clouding her features. "They have -everything- to do with this." Amelie sighed, her voice soft and reasoned. "There can be no hesitation here. No distractions. You know that."
Beneath his hood Higgs' jaw clenched. If she knew about them, she should know that they were only waiting for it all to end. Waiting to watch the world go up in flames together with him. How could that possibly be a detriment to their end game…?
"I know."
"Sacrifices must be made. The greater the sacrifice, the more powerful it is." Amelie returned to him, lowering herself once again, reaching to carefully push back the hood of his cloak, smoothing his hair. "You do this and there will be nothing stopping you. Not even Sam." She cupped his cheek. "Do not forget your purpose."
Higgs closed his eyes, lowering his head. His reply was a whisper. "Yes ma'am." He leaned back, away from her, pulling his hood back over his head, hiding his face once more. Careful not to appear avoidant, he slowly rose to stand, his breath steady. "Of course, I'll take care of it." He bowed before vanishing in a flurry of chiralium, leaving his extinction entity alone on her beach.
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Higgs: Be a good pet and do I say. And you may make it out alive.
He leans in, having removed his mask, and licks your face. Having enough of his antics toward you, especially in front of his men, you turn your head as he is leaning up, running your tongue across his lips. Higgs pulls away and stares at you in disbelief.
You: What? If you can't take it, then don't dish it out.
Higgs: (snorts) I'll remember that.
You certainly hope so.
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So, if I decided to finally sit down and write the sequel to Dance Around - Jump Forward, is this Fandom still alive enough to be interested in it? Just wondering.
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Imagine sleepy morning sex with Peter. Neither of you are quite awake, hands slowly exploring, morning breath mingling as your bodies slowly rock together. Neither one of you is in a rush to finish, just enjoying the cozy comfort of the moment.
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you will look into the faces of passers by hoping for something that will, for an instant, bring me back to you.
some higgs x lee angst lol. they r both not mentally well. sort of based off of a rp i did on beta.character.ai i basically broke his leg and had to take care of him while he kept saying “why don’t u kill me” like BC IM IN LOVE WITH U DUMBASS
(reblogs are appreciated!)
#death stranding#higgs monaghan#oc x canon#self ship#self shipping community#f/o community#f/o#self shipping#fictoromantism#fictosexual#fictoromantic#self insert x canon#fictional other#higgs x oc#higgs x reader#blood tw
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『Having a Crush on a Porter』
Fandom: Death Stranding
Characters: Sam, Higgs.
Genre: Fluff, Headcanon.
Warnings: Slight spoilers to Higgs' backstory, but nothing major; mention of stalking. Reader is gender neutral!
A/N: 'DDS' is delivery dependence syndrome for those who don't know/ forgot! It's mentioned in Sam's part.
Requests open!
.ೃ࿐
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Sam Porter Bridges
Sam isn't one to want to interact other porters, he's just there to get the job done, nothing more
You two just coincidentally met at the same location when completing your orders
And then it happened again. And again... and again. That was when you just had to get to know eachother, you of course starting the conversations, which then lead you two to become friends after a good while
Sam is always looking out for you, telling you to take breaks when you need and telling you to watch out for the MULEs during your deliveries, wouldn't want you to get DDS or getting your things stolen
If he finds an area that was hard to traverse or has a lot of timefall, he'll put up upcoming warning signs or, if he's got the time, build timefall shelters with you in mind
In his opinion, he doesn't think you should be a porter, but that's just his worried self talking
'This job is too dangerous, you shouldn't waste your life on something like this', is something that runs through his mind when he thinks about you, but he knows you're fully capable of handling yourself out there, as much as he hates to admit it
Would he confess to you? Most likely not, unfortunately
Sam is more of a lone wolf type of guy with all he's been through, so not only does he prefer to keep it that way for those reasons, but he doesn't want to ruin the already existing relationship between you two
Sam fears losing you, both to death and if you were to end your friendship
So if keeping the good friendship he has with you comes at the cost of the two of you not developing into something more, then so be it
Let's just hope it's you who confesses for him
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Higgs Monaghan
Unknowing enemies to lovers lol
In all honesty, he only took interest when he saw you frequently talk to Sam while delivering
And he knows Sam of all people wouldn't have a friend, I mean come on! Why would anyone want to talk to him?
So what was with you? He couldn't get it off of his mind, and he didn't want to admit he was jealous that Sam got the attention of someone who genuinely liked being around him and he didn't
And so he made it his duty to take your attention off of Sam and onto him instead, as he can't stand Sam of all people having something he doesn't
It doesn't take long for him to thinking of you romantically, with all the stalking he's done on you
You're his new pizza delivery person from now on, get ready to have your email spammed by a certain 'Peter Englert'
Look, he already likes to mess with Sam on his deliveries, do you really think you'll be any different?
Though, it won't be done by the same hate he has for Sam, rather, he does it out of his own enjoyment of watching you struggle with deliveries
He'll even go as far as to mess with you while you're delivering his orders, but not too much since he still cares about his pizza
But if you manage to deliver his things on time and in good condition, he'll be sure 'Peter' gives you many compliments on your delivery, ever so grateful for your effort
So basically, during your time as a porter, you'll be shown both his "good" and "bad" sides without even knowing they're the same person
If he ever decided on trying to confess to you, he wouldn't say it outright, deeming it a bit too "cliché" for his tastes. Instead, he would write for you in one of his emails (or in all of them until you finally realize lol) a secret message for you to decipher on your own
Which is just him spelling out something like 'I like you' or 'ur hot' with the first letters of his sentences. Nothing too complex, but also enough to let that nerdy side of him out
#death stranding#death stranding fanfic#death stranding x reader#death stranding headcanons#higgs monaghan#higgs monaghan x reader#sam porter bridges#sam porter bridges x reader
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higgs monaghan
#death stranding#death stranding 2#higgs monaghan#higgs death stranding#higgs monaghan x reader#vp#death stranding director's cut#virtual photography
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hairy disaster - adrian pucey
Description: The boys make you feel a bit better after you try to cut your own hair Warnings: Swearing. Mainly dialogue Word count: 640 A/N: wrote this after absolutely butchering my hair last night and now i have almost a bob no its fine guys i promise.
“I fucked up”
That statement alone was enough to snap Adrians attention away from his conversation with Terence and Graham. When he saw you walk up he smiled, nodding in acknowledgement whilst patting the cushion next to him, careful not to disturb Graham's train of thought. He assumed you would nestle yourself under his arm and join in as they spoke about the upcoming holidays. Yet there you stood completely still, shoulders hunched in defeat and embarrassment.
“What happened?”
He straightens his back a tinge of concern knotting in his stomach. You bite your lower lip scratching at your tied up hair.
“I cut my hair” you pause sighing shamefully “and it’s pretty bad”
“You cut your own hair?” Terence squeaks out eyes brightened in surprise.
“Oh I'm excited to see this,” Graham grins, leaning back in his seat, legs spread open in front of him.
“It can't be that bad” Adrian reassures you but your face twists unconvinced “Go on show us then”
You sigh again, taking your hair in your hands and slowly pulling out the hair band that was protecting your dignity. You want to tell them not to laugh but part of you would rather them do it to your face than later on.
Your hair drops, zigzagged lines, uneven ends. Layers that weren’t supposed to be there.
“Oh it can be that bad” Terence laughs standing up to run his fingers through the choppy hair.
“What the hell did you use? What was it again Terence, a chainsaw?” comments Graham scratching his cheek trying to recall their muggle studies lesson from earlier.
Your gaze travels between them and you grimace as Terences fingers brush through already made knots.
“No, a chainsaw would do a better job than this,” Terence responds, his laugh ringing louder in your ear.
You could take their jokes and stupid remarks knowing their affections as friends wouldnt change. However your stomach churns in fear at Adrians opinion. You’ve known him long enough and been officially together for months to be certain he wouldn't break up with you, not over this at least. When you think about it you had both seen eachother go through every ugly phase and loved each other just the same and even more.
When you finally look at Adrian he has a twinkle of amusement in his eyes and he grins as assesses the damage “Cute”.
“Adrian shut up it's horrible” you groan, slapping away Terences hand just as he tries to undo another knot.
“It's fine we can fix it” his shoulders shrug unbothered.
“No we can’t”
“I'm not sure if you want me to comfort you or agree with you?” he questions, eyebrows frowning with a cheeky smile.
“I don't know either”
“Hey at least it's not as bad as Graham's hair in second year-” Terence begins pointing at his friend reclined back in his seat.
“Enough” Graham interrupts “We’re meant to make her feel better not bully me”
“No that did make me feel better thank you” a weak smile spreads across your face remembering Graham's infamous second year hair. He had shown up after summer holidays wearing a beanie and it wasn't until Miles Bletchley snatched it off his head that everyone saw what lay beneath.
Adrian drags himself up from the seat, cupping your face smiling down at you softly “We’ll go to the hairdressers tomorrow yeah? They’ve got a potion that will grow it out and they can fix it”
He kisses the top of your head before leaning his forehead against yours “Its fine, I promise”
“Thank you”
“Remind me to never let you touch my hair with a pair of scissors though” he hums, sneaking a kiss to your cheek as he grabs your hand to pull you towards the couch.
“Seriously shut up”
(join my) Taglist: @limerenze @lilyswh0re @dayangestre @rottenstyx @solacestyles
#adrian pucey#adrian pucey x reader#adrian pucey imagine#graham montague#terence higgs#adrian pucey fluff#adrian pucey scenario#harry potter#harry potter imagine#harry potter scenarios#harry potter fluff#slytherin boys#slytherin quidditch team#slytherin#loverssfevers writing#writing
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for any DS readers,
i think i have a couple higgs fics left before i fell down the COD rabbit hole. i’m still willing to write for him, i’m not sure if i post anything new you guys would read it.
anyway, higgs fic on the horizon
#it’s about time i circle back to rat man#he’s like an itch that comes back at the most inconvenient time#higgs monaghan#troy baker#higgs monaghan x reader
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