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#he decided to move back to texas . and told my little sister (14 years old!!!) that she could go with him . without telling my mom . yknow
francisforever2014 · 3 months
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my dad did something to fuck up the whole family so now i’m trying to convince him (subliminally) to come down here to help me move in summer . you know as reparations
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My Cousin, Pedro Pascal
Ximena Riquelme
16 NOV 2017 12:53 PM
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Before being the protagonist of Narcos or filming with Colin Firth, José Pedro Balmaceda Pascal (42) was a child whom I knew very well because we are from the same family. A man who today looks with nostalgia and some perplexity at his place of origin and his history and who still does not answer what would have happened if he had stayed here.
The first memory I have of Pedro is in the arms of my mother during his baptism, in the garden of my house. She was a weeping bus and had huge black eyes. I was 9 years old. It was cloudy. Years later I learned that the priest was Gerardo Whelan, the legendary rector of Saint George's College. Pedro's parents were not at his baptism: my uncle, José Balmaceda, my mother's only male brother, and his wife Verónica Pascal were asylees at the Venezuelan embassy, which was on Bustos street, near my house. Pepe, as we used to say to my uncle, who years later would become a famous gynecologist, an expert in fertilization, was then a 27-year-old young doctor, in those days wanted by Dina. Some time before they had hidden Andrés Pascal Allende, Mirista and his wife's uncle. One day they came to take him to the José Joaquín Aguirre Hospital and he managed to escape by jumping through the roofs. It was October 1975.
Like most of the Chilean families, there were supporters of both sides in mine: for and against Pinochet. Trying to help Pedro's parents, my dad called a relative who held a high position in the Army. "Tell the children to get asylum, because I cannot guarantee their lives or that nothing happens to Veronica," was his reply. She was 22 years old. Then began the journey of my uncles and with them that of my cousin José Pedro Balmaceda Pascal. Pepe and Verónica had to start living secretly in different houses. Pedro, who was only 6 months old at the time, and his 3-year-old sister Javiera were left in charge of my mother's older sister, "Aunt Juani."
The second memory I have of Pedro is when I accompanied my parents, who carried him and his sister in their arms, to stand on the sidewalk in front of the Venezuelan embassy so that their parents could see them through the window.
My uncles left the Venezuelan embassy for the airport in January 1976, Pedro was 9 months old and obviously does not remember anything. I just remember that they didn't let me go. Pedro could not record the image, which I could not see, of his grandfather Luis Pascal Vigil - a very prominent lawyer - singing the National Anthem on the balcony of Pudahuel. A memory that is not mine but that I adopted, for cute.
As the people of the International Red Cross advised our family on time, Pedro and his sister did not leave the embassy with their parents, but arrived directly at the airport: this allowed their passports not to be stamped with the "L" for " limited to circulate "that stamped on the exiles who left. Therefore, the years that Pedro and Javiera came could come to Chile without problems. And for that reason, the choclón of cousins, we were able to share long summers in Pucón and some winters in Santiago.
The Balmaceda Pascal first arrived in Aarhus, Denmark, in October 1976. A year later they left for San Antonio, Texas, where Pedro's father was able to continue improving himself thanks to a grant from the Rockefeller Foundation. Veronica earned a PhD in Child Psychology.
________________________________________
"But Denmark is invisible to me," Pedro writes me by email. A while ago I proposed to interview him at a distance to travel a little about his history, and here we are, in front of the computer, sharing memories. "It is invisible to me, like everything that happened before. Although once, after telling him about my childhood, a doctor told me that the temporary separation with my mother was trapped in the memory of my body and that I could remember it through the senses".
My cousin, far away
The third memory I have of Pedro is a summer in Pucón. It must have been in 1978. "Pepelo", as we said, was no longer a guagua but a restless, very blond boy, who was so impacted by poverty in Chile that when he went out on the street with his gringo accent, he asked any person: "Are you poor?" He took food out of the pantry and gave it away. With my cousins we rented a warm wooden house, colorful, with the door frames out of square. It was summers with trips to those black sand beaches that burned the feet and picnics in Caburgua with lamb on the stick. They took us to mass and Pedro sang very inspired.
"This is where the memories become more vivid, like dreams," he writes. "I remember so many details: my older cousins, children my age who were like family. The beach seemed endless. I also remember running down the hallways and stairs of Aunt Juani's house looking for Santa Claus at Christmas."
XR: What was it like leaving your parents in the United States?
PP: "I think the trauma was going back to the States, although I obviously wanted to be with my parents. But childhood in Chile, with the Balmaceda and Pascal, was a dream, a world where nothing was missing, pure adventure and love."
Now that he tells me that, I remember that image of Pedro hanging on the neck of our aunt Juani, crying in Pudahuel because she did not want to return. At that time going to the airport was a panorama: we were going en masse to leave him and his sister, who traveled in charge of the stewardesses.
In 1981 I went with my parents and my two sisters to see the Balmaceda Pascal in Texas. I remember an eternal road trip from Miami, I remember Pedro's house, in a middle-class neighborhood, comfortable, beautiful, lovingly arranged by his mother. I remember the tears of my mother and Pedro's mother when we said goodbye to return to Chile. We still didn't know when they could return. Although Pedro never fully returned.
In December 1983, Pepe and Verónica were able to enter Chile. The whole family was packed on the terrace of Pudahuel, waiting for them. I remember the Balmaceda Pascal walking from the stairs of the plane to the International Police. I remember them happy, triumphant. Pedro was 8 years old and chose to stay in my house, in love with my girl sister.
We all went to Quintero, to the house of our grandfather Pepe, a great smoker, tennis player, and fanatic fanatic who took us to the town cinema to see double Tora! Programs, Tora !, Tora! More Bridges on the River Kwai and other old movies. Surely Pedro had to see several. Since he was a boy he said he wanted to be a "director". He liked horror movies and was a big movie consumer, like his dad.
PP: "I remember going to the movies with the cousins and the grandfather to see anything with Clint Eastwood, Sylvester Stallone. They leased me VHS movies to see alone and happy."
XR: You once recited Hamlet on the beach with Grandpa.
PP: "No, it was Death of a Salesman, by Arthur Miller. I was about 14 years old. I videotaped it and lost the fucking camera on the trip back to the United States."
After that summer, Pedro began to come more sporadically. He was already grown up, at school and then at university. They had moved to Newport Beach, California. His father was doing very well. But Pedro, not so much.
PP: "I think that the way the family supported me in Chile was the opposite of what I experienced in Newport Beach. I started well in California but at 13 years old, very involved in the cinema, reading plays, books, TV, TV, TV, obsessed with these things, I had the bad luck to find few like me. It was a world very attached to conservatism and its privileges where not fitting was punished. There was a group of shitty goats who were my friends the first year and became my terrors thereafter. I don't enjoy remembering that time, but there are deep connections from back then. Friends of my parents who are like parents until today."
Pedro's mom soon found a performance arts program at a high school in another district. A more inclusive school compared to Corona del Mar, the neighborhood where they lived in Newport.
PP: "My mom and my driver's license were my salvation. There I was able to unleash my appetite for movies and theater without limits."
As time went by Pedro became a fun, provocative teenager with character. He said he was "lazy", but he went to study Theater at NYU in 1993 and he loved it. I started to see it less. When he came to Chile he went out with his friends, I was already married and having children.
XR: Did you find that our way of life was very boring?
PP: "Bored, no. But overwhelming regarding life's permanent decisions. I didn't have the Catholic structure, and I felt there was no room for a young guy like me. Like suddenly, from one trip of mine to another, you had lives that included marriages and children, and pleasing the visits of the gringo cousin was no longer an option for all of you. I had to duel, because I was jealous of his inattention."
XR: Do you find us very conservative?
PP: "Yes, but it is a major contradiction for me. I come from the perspective that no one can decide how someone else should live their life. And well, in our family there are social rules that are very firm. I think that a person has the right to live his life conservatively or wildly as long as he does not negatively impact anyone or tries to embarrass others by his lifestyle. I don't touch these issues very much with our family for fear of hearing their perspective, but what I do know is that if I ever needed help I could ask any member of our family by the name of Balmaceda, and I would get it."
In 1995, Pedro's parents returned to Chile with their two youngest children, Nicolás and Lucas, who had been born in California. Javiera also came for a couple of years. Pedro stayed in the United States.
PP: "It was a very scary period. I grew up with my family in the United States and from one day to the next there was no home to return to. Suddenly the idea of the safe nest was gone. It was shocking because in previous years I took for granted the privileged life we had in California. I never thought that this could change as suddenly as happened to my parents when they became exiles. Everything felt fragile. Also, I knew that my parents' marriage was wrong and that the tension of those circumstances was hardly going to end. My mother's life felt in danger and the line between needing her, being there for her and finishing my studies and pursuing a career was a horrible conflict. I knew that my mom wanted me to continue doing mine, she never would have wanted me to sacrifice it."
XR: Did you really resent the failure of your parents' marriage?
PP: "For me it was the hardest time. I have not been able, and I do not know if someday I will be able to reconcile completely how my parents separated and the tragedy that came after that separation. The circumstances of my mother's death made it very hard for us to keep her memory of who she was. It hurts so much ... Sometimes I feel distressed and try to face it in the best possible way, because I know that my mother would not like me to do it in any other way."
Pedro lost his mother when he was 24 years old.
PP: "It's hard to say what I remember most about her. You met her, so it is easy for you to understand that she was the love of my life. I think of her every day. Since I don't pray, I can't say that I have a practice to feel her close, but I live for her even though she's gone, and that makes sense to me."
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From Alexander to Pedro
XR: Do you believe that pain makes us stronger or does it seem like a horrible cliché?
PP: "I don't think it's a terrible cliche but a profound reality. In some way, losing the most important person in your life, discovering that something like this is possible and that what you fear most in life can happen is an identifiable and permanent moment. There is a before and after after his death. I think, yes, that old age would not have been for my mother, there would have been no footwear with her. Of course, no one wants to grow old, but others can handle it better. I would not have liked to see my mom struggling with it, but at the same time, I wish I had her every day still with me."
It may have been the summer of 2012. Pedro said to our aunt Juani: "I am 37 years old and I still can't get what I want. And it's the only thing I know how to do." It had been a long time since the death of his mother in the summer of 2000 that Pedro had changed his name. From Pedro Balmaceda to Pedro Pascal. He had been searching for years, years of casting where, by being called Pedro Balmaceda in the studios, they hoped to find a Latin or classic Mexican phenotype. He had only made minor appearances in some series.
XR: Although you did not regret it, you did wear Alexander at some point. Why?
PP: "That was a desperate period and directly related to having lost my mother. I was desperate to work, to fill my days with something more to suffer. To eliminate the confusion that casting directors had with this guy named Pedro with European or Caucasian traits, I changed my first name to Alexander and took my mom's last name, Pascal. That only lasted a year, until I was able to find a job and be selected for an Ibsen theatrical classic. But it was too late for people to identify me as "Alex". Also, my mom named me Pedro. So the decision was to call me Pedro Pascal, a name that fits with me more than any other."
Soon after that came Brothers and Sisters, other small roles, and later more important ones in The Good Wife, The Law and Order, The Mentalist, until Game of Thrones, Narcos in 2015 and now, filming Muralla china with Matt Damon and William Dafoe - last year we all went to see his cousins together - and then Kingsman 2 with Colin Firth, Julianne Moore, Jeff Bridges, Halle Berry and Channing Tatum.
XR : Have you ever been excited acting with such powerful actors?
PP: "I have been thrilled with everyone."
With fame have come the new meetings of the cousins with Pedro Pascal. We all want to see him, take pictures of us, we ask him for greetings-chub for friends, we inflate ourselves by saying that he is our cousin. That Peña, the protagonist of Narcos and the sexiest guy in the world, is my cousin-brother. He laughs and humorously calls us "scoundrels" because now we remember him. In fact, that's what our cousin chat on Whastapp is called.
But there is also the modesty to disturb him. Know that you are busy. That while I'm sending you these questions, you're filming in Boston with Denzel Washington. And to feel that there is always a lack of time to speak to him calmly, a space to ask him questions like the ones that occur to me now:
XR: Exile changed your life. Can you imagine growing up in Chile?
PP: "I don't know, because I haven't thought much about it. I have been asked this question all my life and have never been able to come up with an answer. Perhaps my life would have been more complete and solid. What I am used to is that the past disappears as if it had been lived by someone else, in another time."
XR: Do you miss something from when you were Pedro Balmaceda?
PP: "You know? There is very little difference between Pedro Balmaceda and Pedro Pascal. As it is all part of José Pedro Balmaceda Pascal, I feel the same person. But with back problems and more money."
XR: Would you like to start a family?
PP: "Being a dad? I don't know. I have no fucking idea. I love being an uncle. It may just end there. But anything is possible."
XR: Marialy Rivas said something very nice about you on Saturday: that when you play a character, you pretend that this character brought a whole previous story, much bigger than what they are telling. And it's true: you carry a bigger story than you tell it.
PP: "I don't know, cousin. I am very confused trying to organize the past and see what turns out. It helps me understand the pain or be grateful for what I have. Sometimes I feel like I'm a fraud, living between waiting for fame and attention and completely embarrassed by these wishes.
In reference to what Marialy said, I think she means that I put all my confusion, joy and sorrow, ambivalence, hostility, rage, love, lust, greed, compassion, ignorance, knowledge either to indicate a map with the finger on Narcos, throwing an arrow in Game of Thrones, lashing out at Kingsman. Cool! But I think my experience in theater taught me that."
XR: Would you someday like your life to be a script?
PP: "No way." (in english)
XR: Do you still want to be a "director", as you used to say when you were a kid?
PP: "Yes! That will be my way of being a father. Father of a production."
XR: Is dreaming about an Oscar the dream of every actor, even if you don't confess it?
PP: "I confess that possibly… yes."
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ion0ra · 6 years
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Story Time
So, as a lot of you who've ever seen my family posts will understand, they're pretty messed up. Like, there's lighter things from just bad jokes, to things like full-on bigotry and abuse.
I wanna lay it all out, because I was thinking about it and wanted to get it off my chest.
So, there are 3 kinds of messed up with my parents, all their own special brew of abusive and neglectful.
So, you have my mother. She seems like a typical Southern mom on the surface. You can see her at church. At Wal-Mart. Dresses kinda trashy. Big & loud hair, and bad teeth. But if you knew her for longer than a week, you started to get this vibe from her you couldn't quite put your finger on until you REALLY knew her.
She's one of the few people I genuinely hate in this world. Growing up, she called me names (to my face) like "fat," "stupid," and other such names, and constantly verbally demeaned, bullied, and abused me (she'd constantly "joke" about things she disapproved of, sometimes even so far as to physically do things to me I'd rather not discuss publicly; she'd withhold information from me constantly, the list goes on. When my parents were talking about getting divorced, she took me to the Taco Bueno/Raising Cane's parking lot shortly after my birthday and told me and made me choose right then and there who I wanted to live with (which is a whole other emotional experience.)) She'd do things from her "jokes," to the "punishment" she came up with where every time I said something she didn't like, she'd slap my face.
Point blank. Didn't matter where or when it was, she did it. More often than not, it was whenever she felt like.
And then there was the privacy invasions. At first, it seemed logical (for someone who's grown up like that) that she saw everything. All my game accounts were linked to hers, and she knew my school-assigned email address (they used it to help teach us about "the real world".) I wasn't allowed to have a phone until age 13, which she could go through any time she wanted.
She'd punish me for whatever she wanted, whenever she wanted, however she wanted. One summer (and this was in Texas, in an area where it gets particularly hot/humid) she locked me out of the house all day (from 9 until about 6 or 7 at night, whenever she decided to get back,) and told me I wasn't allowed back inside (she would contest that because she only forbade me from entering, and told my older sister and two stepsisters I was allowed exactly 1 five-minute bathroom break all day and to tie me down outside if I needed to be, that she "technically" didn't lock me out) until she got back. I wasn't allowed any food, and had to drink from a dirty ass hose. I wasn't allowed to accept help from anyone, and my sisters weren't allowed to take food outside to me. She got home that evening and made me go straight to bed, then said I "hadn't learned anything" and made me do it all over again. I literally went 48 straight hours without food during that time.
The thing she was "punishing" me for? My dog had decided it wanted to lay down while I was taking it for a walk and got his belly a little red and some dirt on it.
Point is, knowing my mother, she was out-right abusive. Case #1 for abusive parents. From her, trust issues and paranoia got amplified, but those are whole other stories.
My dad and stepmom, on the other hand, were more into the manipulative side of things (my dad resorting to getting physical "if need be.")
My dad looks like a quirky guy on the outside. Tall, bald, tattooed. If you meshed with him, you'd get along swimmingly. Otherwise, you were me.
At first, I didn't notice his bigotry (I mean how could I? I was basically a smaller version of him, but not quite.) It wasn't until I'd gotten on Tumblr (about 2010 ish was when I first got on? If I remember correctly) and started questioning basically everything about myself when I started recognizing the subtler things, and it was definitely apparent when my older sister moved in with us.
At the time, she'd left my mom's house (because she'd gotten to her, too) and I was about 14-15. I found out before my parents did that she was actually transgender (and went by he/him pronouns, had a support group, etc.) I was like "oh cool I've always wanted an older brother" but the condition was I not tell my parents until it had already been brought up.
Now... Especially with my dad, he'll say he'll support someone he cares about unconditionally, but if you do something he doesn't agree with, he'll either get... Apprehensive, or just straight-up drop you. When he found out about my older brother, he basically bullied "the phase" (as my dad called it) out of him. It officially ended with a Christmas story that actually involves my stepmom.
Anyways, that's where I started finding out that even though he claimed to be unconditionally supportive, he wasn't.
Long story short, had a Tumblr and a support group, they found out about it, literally took everything away from me and invaded my privacy on literally all my accounts, told me I was "being enabled" because I had friends who'd sent me positivity during a barage of Anon hate, wouldn't even listen to me when I tried to explain how I literally didn't know how some of the stuff that was on there wasn't me (someone has gained access to my account and basically started up a sideblog that let's just say a 14-year-old shouldn't even look at, much less have,) tried to get me to tell them "the whole truth" and when I came out about my sexuality had to bottle it up again and act like it was "just a phase" because of how they reacted, and over the course of the next 5 years tried to invade my privacy as much as they possibly could. (Hell, even today, my dad still has my old email account on his phone to "check on it")
He's the kinda guy who would physically restrain me from doing something, then claim I voluntarily didn't do it. The list goes on.
My stepmother was arguably one of the most manipulative people I ever knew. Anti-vaxxer (to the point that she signed a consent form saying neither of my little sisters could get immunization shots from their schools and when asked about it, shrugged it off and was like "they don't need them," but there was more), terf bangs, the whole shebang. Would constantly goad people, then when someone called her out on it acted like she was the victim. Got my dad to yell at me/restrain me because I was "being too aggressive" trying to not have a panic attack because she was yelling. Got the word "ridiculous" banned in the house (yes, literally banned.) So, so much more.
She'd constantly demean me and talk down to me and about me, tell my sister's they didn't have to listen or pay attention to me, and when I brought it up to my dad/publicly, she'd simply act confused and say she didn't know what I was talking about, or that I was misremembering (a common tactic my mother used that my dad and stepmom hated.) One time, my dad actually asked me if she turned into my mother when she was gone, and I paused for a moment and was like "I mean yeah." (Don't ask how that resolved.)
She was the kind of woman who would slap you in the face and then talk to you long enough to try to convince you that you were never actually slapped in the face (unlike my mom, who would and would just tell you you deserved it.) This was the woman who, when my older sister's friend asked how her son was doing, almost caused a scene by loudly stating that her "daughter was doing just fine and I'll let her know that you were thinking about her." (Mind you this friend didn't know that my older brother was trans. This friend only knew him as he, and once even when I slipped up they didn't seem to notice it.)
All my parents would constantly demand someone access my email, messages, and history at any given point. I had friends who I talked to about this that I was scared shitless my parents would find out about because I didn't wanna lose them. I made so many accounts to cover my tracks I've literally lost access to a lot of them because I just can't remember the login details. My parents constantly told me "if you're hiding something that means you know it's bad" out of the blue, keeping me in a constant state of paranoia.
One time, I'd accidentally left my phone in my room and my dad walked in and stayed in for an abnormally long amount of time. I didn't go in because I knew they would definitely see that as a sign something was up, and just rode out my anxiety until my dad walked out, a hand in his pocket. He made this dramatic deal of calmly saying "Now... You know the rules... I'll forgive you this time, but next time will be worse... Especially after what's happened before..." And I was freaking the fuck out. He looked at me and laughed as he pulled a candy wrapper out of his pocket. He said he chose those words specifically because he wanted to see what kind of reaction he'd get out of me.
There are so many other examples I could bring up that I don't have the time or emotional energy to all in one post, but it breaks my heart there are still people who don't believe there are people like this out there. I once had a guy ask "well if your mom's that bad how come she's not in prison?" And my reply was simple: "Because she can cover herself up well." Parents like this are out there. People like this are out there. Please don't let this be your relationships in any fashion because you don't deserve it.
tl;dr: parental abuse and violations take many different forms. If you have any parents or people you know like this, as soon and as safely as you can, get the fuck out. They may only damage you permanently even worse.
The post that got me thinking about all this over the last emotion-charged hour and a half: https://freckledfemme.tumblr.com/post/169530766178/omgwhy-bpdcalvinfischoeder-staar84
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wsmith215 · 4 years
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Family separation returns under cover of the coronavirus
Jose walks with his children, who were recently released from a government shelter where they had been held for more than two months. (Kirk McKoy / Los Angeles Times)
Dad lives about 10 miles from the White House, stringing together gardening jobs, not letting the kids touch him when he gets home for fear of contagion.
Mom lives in a makeshift refugee camp on the border in Matamoros, Mexico, one of the world’s most dangerous cities, rationing soap.
Three of the children — ages 10, 14, and 16 — just joined their father, Jose, after winning release from a government shelter where they had been held for more than two months. Now, they have deportation orders hanging over their heads.
U.S. officials are fighting in court to take the three children and deport them to El Salvador — to no one. The only way to avoid being separated from their parents, officials say, would be for their mother in Mexico to give up, too. Government lawyers said they’d put her on a plane with the kids if she agreed to return to El Salvador and never again try to join her husband in the U.S.
This is the new family separation, two years after taking kids from their parents at the border blew up into a crisis for the Trump administration. Citing the coronavirus to seal the border to an unprecedented extent, the administration is engaged in a pressure campaign against immigrant parents to get them to give up either their kids or their legal claims to protection in the U.S.
Scores of migrant families across the country are being targeted, according to court documents and more than 20 officials, judges, lawyers and migrants. Many spoke on condition of anonymity for fear of jeopardizing their legal cases.
The fates of many of them may hinge on Jose’s family’s case, which has become a test of the administration’s latest policies to bar migrant kids and families, said Claudia Cubas, the litigation director for the Capital Area Immigrants’ Rights Coalition, and Jose’s lawyer.
With Jose’s family’s case the furthest along in the courts, “this is either going to make it or break it for people,” she said.
Administration officials deny that they are deliberately trying to separate families.
Story continues
“Consistent with President Trump’s June 20, 2018, executive order, it is the policy of the administration to maintain family unity,” Immigration and Customs Enforcement said in a statement.
The statement came after ICE officials this month presented the roughly 180 parents in its custody with the choice of separating from their children or remaining indefinitely detained with them, according to government filings in court and legal service providers. Several hundred more unaccompanied children have been united with a sponsor in the U.S., like Jose’s children, but remain at risk. ICE declined to say how many have final removal orders.
Advocates argue that unaccompanied minors are entitled to receive immigration hearings under U.S. law. Government attorneys maintain that many of the children had a hearing under the administration’s “Remain in Mexico” policy after they first arrived at the border and still face deportation, even if that has the effect of dividing them from their parents. The Remain in Mexico policy requires people seeking asylum in the U.S. to wait in Mexico throughout their court hearings.
“There has been due process afforded to those minor children,” one administration lawyer said in a May hearing for Jose’s family, citing the previous proceedings.
Bridget Cambria, a lawyer with the Aldea People’s Justice Center in Pennsylvania, represents detained parents who testified that ICE officials pressured them to separate from their children, rejected the claim that the government’s actions constitute due process.
“Whatever you want to call it,” said Cambria. “It’s asking mothers and fathers to give up their kids.”
Attorney Claudia Cubas talks to Jose and his children in April, shortly after they were released from a government shelter. (Kirk McKoy / Los Angeles Times)
Jose’s three daughters — ages 16, 14, and 11 — are about as tall as he is. The 10-year-old boy doesn’t leave his father’s side.
In less than a year, the two oldest girls and their little brother have gone from safe-houses in El Salvador to a tent on the Rio Grande to a government shelter, and now to a home in a Washington suburb with a green lawn, a bicycle and a driveway.
Jose mostly speaks for them. He still doesn’t feel safe, even in the U.S.: MS-13, the gang in El Salvador that told his wife they’d kill the kids if she didn’t tell where he was, has offshoots in Maryland.
“There’s still this sadness in them,” Jose said of his children. “The biggest change that I’ve seen is that now that we’re here, it’s like they can breathe again.”
In El Salvador, Jose was a street preacher. The gangs ordered him to stop, but he wouldn’t. He met his wife, who also proselytized, at their evangelical church. MS-13 had killed her first husband, the two eldest girls’ biological father, in 2006.
Jose fled first, thinking the threats to the family would lessen if he were gone. He crossed the border with his youngest daughter in Laredo, Texas, just short of one year ago. The decision to come separately — they couldn’t afford to bring everyone at one time — has splintered the family in the U.S. immigration system.
Jose told U.S. officials at the border that he was afraid of persecution in El Salvador and was allowed to go to Maryland, where he has a brother and close friend.
By the time Jose’s wife and the three other kids arrived at the border about three months later, the Trump administration had imposed its Remain in Mexico policy across the entire southern border, dramatically changing the rules. Officials turned the four back to Matamoros.
In January, an immigration judge in Texas denied their asylum claims. Jose’s wife believed the judge said she could not appeal without a lawyer.
In roughly four months in Matamoros, the kids had “suffered physical and sexual assault; endured illness, extreme temperatures, and malnutrition,” according to a legal filing. Ten days after the judge ruled, Jose and his wife decided she should take the children to the bridge and send them across the border on their own.
Many parents have chosen to take that chance rather than risk keeping their children in the refugee camps along the border. Of some 65,000 migrants subject to Remain in Mexico, at least 1,114 have been kidnapped, raped or assaulted in Mexico, including children, according to Human Rights First. Of asylum seekers subject to the policy, fewer than 1% have ultimately been granted relief.
On Jan. 17, the three children turned themselves in to U.S. officials at the port of entry between Matamoros and Brownsville, Texas, and were designated as unaccompanied minors, affording them special protections under the law, including a hearing before an immigration judge.
As soon as officials located Jose, he applied for custody. But the reunification stalled when the government discovered the kids had prior removal orders dating from the ruling against them and their mother in January.
Cubas and the children’s legal team sued for their release in March. The case has moved through the immigration system and federal court.
For already traumatized children, Cubas said, “it’s been an emotional roller coaster.”
In the little boy’s legal declaration — in El Salvador, the family moved so much to hide from the gangs that he never learned to read and can hardly write — he says he doesn’t really remember what happened after they crossed into the U.S. “because I’m little.”
“I miss my mom I don’t know what is happening to her,” he said. “I don’t want to return to Mexico because it is a bad place and in El Salvador the gangs are after us.”
Jose’s wife, seen in April, is stuck in a makeshift refugee camp on the border in Matamoros, Mexico. She faces dim prospects for reuniting with her family. (Javier Escalante / Los Angeles Times)
Their mother now lives alone in a blue-tarp tent in Matamoros.
“It’s just me left here,” she said in an interview last month.
The camp, which exploded in size with Remain in Mexico, has no cleaning materials or private bathrooms. Many people bathe in the muddy Rio Grande, where her three kids once saw a dead body floating. Sickness is rampant.
Public health advocates and experts have warned that a coronavirus outbreak in the migrant camps along the border would be devastating.
The mother is not so worried for her kids anymore, now that they’re in Maryland with Jose. She says she talks to them every day.
The legal battle over the children has left Jose trying to play the part of both parents amid a pandemic. He takes as many precautions as he can.
“I have to provide for them,” he said, “but then I’m exposing myself.”
He’s even more worried for his wife in Mexico. So long as they’re apart, he said, “I have this gap in my heart.”
A young migrant named Stephanie, 10, near the Rio Grande in Matamoros, Mexico. (Carolyn Cole / Los Angeles Times)
On May 8, lawyers for the government submitted a proposal for Jose’s family:
If the children agreed to “their expeditious and immediate repatriation to El Salvador” and withdrew their suits against the government, and if their mother presented herself at the border, ICE would deport them together to El Salvador, “thus, ensuring that Plaintiffs remain in the care of a parent.”
But, they warned in a footnote, should Jose’s wife try to pursue her immigration case, they could send the kids to El Salvador alone.
“To be removed with her children, Plaintiffs’ mother would have to immediately elect an expeditious reunification and joint repatriation with her children,” they wrote, “and choose to forego further action.”
They are far from the only family to be presented with such a choice; a very similar case involving two sisters, 8 and 11, unfolded recently in Texas.
The girls crossed the border by themselves after their father was mugged in Matamoros, where they’d been required to stay under the administration’s policy after seeking asylum last September. Their mother, who entered the U.S. on an existing tourist visa and is also applying for asylum, is in Houston. Thirty minutes before the girls were due to be reunited with her, ICE moved to deport them to El Salvador.
After lawyers filed suit, the girls were released to their mother. ICE has agreed not to deport them until a decision by the immigration appeals court — but they still have removal orders.
“This is another form of family separation, and it’s quite in your face,” said Elizabeth Sanchez Kennedy, immigration legal services Director at YMCA International Services, who represents them.
At a hearing in early May in Jose’s family’s case, federal district Judge Randolph D. Moss said he was “troubled” by the government’s effort to “orphan” the children.
“The plaintiffs here are very young,” Moss said.
“You’re taking a nine-year-old child, removing that child from the parent and sending that child to a place in which the child has no guardian.”
With the judge questioning the constitutionality of separating Jose’s family, ICE said it would hold off on deporting the children until November or a decision by the immigration appeals court. That allows Jose time to pursue his separate asylum claim.
Getting a hearing, however, is no easy feat, with already backlogged immigration courts thrown into further chaos by the coronavirus. Already, Jose has been waiting close to a year for the Baltimore immigration court to schedule one.
Ashley Tabaddor, president of the National Assn. of Immigration Judges, noted that the administration repeatedly has pushed back Remain in Mexico hearings while insisting that unaccompanied children continue to attend court during the pandemic.
“It’s clearly more driven by law enforcement priorities than health considerations,” Tabaddor said.
Meanwhile, ICE’s stay is at the agency’s discretion; Jose’s kids still face removal orders. If he ultimately wins asylum, he likely could include his children, and potentially their mother.
In Matamoros, she said she will never allow her children to return to El Salvador.
“My wish is to be with my children there in America one day,” she said. “But if it is my turn to return, I have already lived my life. They are just beginning to live.”
Times staff writer Patrick McDonnell and special correspondent Cecilia Sánchez contributed from Matamoros and Mexico City.
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A Weekend in Paris
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This is it! The final chapter, I hope you all think it’s worth the wait. This chapter wraps up two stories, Farkle Meets the New Year and this one. Please let me know what you think, I would love to know. Thanks to all who have commented and reblogged and read this story. If you need links to previous chapters, please let me know. I’ll be happy to send them. Enjoy!
A Weekend in Paris
Chapter 12
 Monday, August 14, 2023, the loft of Maya and Riley, New York City
It was 5 o’clock in the late afternoon when Riley finally arrived back at the loft she shared with Maya. She and Lucas had just flown in from Texas and the taxi they took from the airport had just left to take Lucas back to the apartment he shared with Josh in her parent's building.  Maya and Josh weren’t due to return from Pennsylvania until Friday, Riley was honestly happy for the peace and quiet. She loved Lucas and being on the ranch but she was ready for some alone time. Time just to be Riley. Sarah had vacated the apartment a month ago when she and Zay had returned to the city from their own trip to Texas. It seems Zay had asked Sarah to move in with him and she accepted. Since Zay lived next door it was easy for them to keep an eye on things until Riley and Maya returned.
Riley had pulled her big suitcase into her room and threw it on her bed when she heard a noise come from the small kitchen of the loft. Riley grabbed the baseball bat that she kept next to her bedroom door for emergencies. She quietly walked out of her room when she heard the faucet running. Why would a burglar need to run water? She moved closer to the wall that went all the way to the kitchen counter. She would walk slowly and quietly until she could see who was in the kitchen. She was scared but hoped it would be Zay or Sarah. The closer she got to the kitchen the faster and harder her heart was beating. She wished she’d thought to pick up her phone to dial 911. She tiptoed along the wall with the bat held up over her head, hoping whoever it was wouldn’t hear her. She was about halfway to the kitchen counter when she heard glass breaking. She thought about running back to her bedroom and locking the door, but the next thing she heard eased every fear she had.
No one knew that Maya and Josh were leaving Philly earlier than originally planned. They decided they had missed their friends so much that they wanted to surprise them. They had gotten back into the city about 1 o’clock that same afternoon and for some reason once Josh dropped her off, all Maya had wanted to do was sleep in her own bed. It had been 2 months and 10 days since she had been able to and even though Morgan Matthew’s old bed was comfortable it still wasn't her own. After Josh helped her bring her bags upstairs to her room she kissed him goodbye and headed straight to her bed. She didn’t plan on sleeping for 4 hours but was glad she did, now she could stay up late and clean the loft. It wasn’t messy by any means but she wanted it to look nice for Riley. She needed to go the market as well, there was no food in the place, not even a bottle of water. She was so excited to see Riley and catch up. This is the longest she’d ever been apart from her.
When she woke up Maya went into the kitchen to get a drink of water. She pulled a glass out of the cabinet. She didn’t remember turning on any lights, but there was one on in the living room, maybe Josh turned it on. She turned on the faucet and filled her glass with cold water. Once she emptied the glass she turned to put it in the sink, but it slipped out of hand and hit the floor, shattering in what looked like a million pieces.
“Crap!” Maya said. She hadn’t bothered to put on a pair of shoes after her nap, she was going to have to climb on the counter to get out of the kitchen without getting glass in one of her feet.  The kitchen was so small that it only took her a couple steps to get to the counter that opened the kitchen up to the living room.  As she jumped to the floor she got a surprise that nearly gave her a heart attack!
“Riles! What are you doing here? When did you get here? Why do you have that baseball bat?” Maya asked, still startled to see her best friend.
“Peaches!” Riley yelled. She saw the startled look on Maya’s face but just grabbed her friend and hugged her all while Maya was asking a million questions.
The two were so happy to see each other and immediately started talking, the broken glass was forgotten.
 Monday, August 14, 2023, at the Apartment of Josh and Lucas
Lucas was happy to be back in New York. He had missed the sights and sounds of the city and couldn’t wait to get back to his job and school. This was his last semester before vet school and he was excited about the next phase of his life. He and Riley had made a few plans about the wedding but no date had been set yet.
Lucas paid the taxi and took his bags from the sidewalk and headed up the steps of the brownstone. He unlocked the door, letting himself in the building and placed his bags just inside the door. He pulled the largest suitcase down the hall to his apartment. He was getting ready to unlock it when he heard a whoop coming from inside. He had forgotten that Cory and Auggie had been using his and Josh’s apartment as their man cave for the summer. He quietly opened the door and had to laugh at an oblivious Cory and Auggie. They were so engrossed in the Phillies vs. Mets game they didn’t even hear him come through the door.  He quietly rolled his bag into the living room and headed back down the hall for the rest of his stuff. When he came back they still didn’t hear him. He quietly closed the door and walked over to the couch and sat down next to Auggie.
“Hey Aug, will you pass me the popcorn?” Lucas asked.
Without taking his eyes from the TV, Auggie handed him the bowl of popcorn and said, “Sure, here you go, Lucas.”
Lucas couldn’t believe what he was seeing. He was about ready to say something else when Josh walked in the room. He walked right past Lucas and to the chair sitting next to the other end of the couch. All the Matthews men in the room had their eyes glued to the TV and not one of them gave Lucas being there a second thought. He set the bowl of popcorn back on the table, got up and opened the front door and slammed it as hard as he could. Still, not one of them even blinked. Lucas was dumbfounded.
Josh knowing full well that Lucas was in the room, looked at his brother and asked, “Cory did you just hear something?”
“Not a thing, What about you, Aug?” Cory asked his son without ever taking his eyes off the game.
“I didn’t hear nothing, what about you, Lucas?” Auggie asked trying to hide a grin.
Lucas saw Auggie trying not to smile, “You guys really want to do this? I guess if I’m not wanted here I’ll just go back to Riley’s place and sleep there for the night, see ya.”
That got Lucas more attention than he wanted. Cory ran to the door and threw himself against it, “I don’t think so, Friar! Let me have those boots!”
For once in his life, Lucas happily pulled the boots off his feet and handed them to Cory, “here ya go, Dad.”
“Uh-uh, don’t call me Dad, you can’t say things like that about my daughter and then try to be all nice!” Cory took the boots and threw them across the room.
“What did you say about my sister?” Auggie was only 14 but he was as tall as the other men in the room and he walked over to Lucas and grabbed his shirt and was in his face.
“I was only kidding, Aug, please let go of my shirt,” Lucas said as nice as he could.
Auggie’s face softened into a huge smile, “I don’t have it in me to hurt that pretty face of yours, besides we all know you could whoop me good.” He let go of Lucas’ shirt and smoothed it out. “Welcome home big brother! We got ya!”
Josh walked over to Lucas and put an arm around his shoulder, “Welcome home, Howdy! Did we have you worried?”
Lucas shrugged his shoulders and answered, “I was beginning to think something was seriously wrong, what are you doing here? I thought you and Maya were going to be in Philly until Friday?”
“Topanga told Maya that you and Riley weren’t due back until tomorrow, we wanted to surprise you. I guess we did,” Josh said with that trademark grin plastered across his face.
Cory had walked across the room to pick up Lucas’ shoes. When he got back to where the others were standing, he handed Lucas his boots and put his hand on Lucas’ shoulder, “no more stealing your shoes. I know it’s been a while but, I’m done, you and Riley, together forever, you’ve more than proven yourself to me Lucas, welcome home, Son.”
Lucas just laughed at the antics of the Matthews men and decided it was indeed good to be home with his family.
 Tuesday, August 15, 2023, Riley and Maya’s place and Topanga’s Bakery
Riley didn’t mean to sleep until 9 a.m. the next morning, but she and Maya had stayed up late talking, the two of them were all caught up on what’s been going on in each other’s lives. She had called Lucas before she fell asleep to tell him goodnight. The two of them decided to ask their respective roommates to have lunch with them the next day. They would all meet at Topanga’s at 11. Riley got up and went into the bathroom to shower, she wore shorts and a tank top and braided her hair and added a bit of lip gloss. Maya was already up and dressed and was talking to Josh on the phone. Riley sat down next to her., but Maya didn’t seem to notice her there.
“Yeah, I know we have to tell everyone, but let’s start with Riley and Lucas,” Maya said quietly.
“Think they’ll be surprised?” she asked whoever she was talking to.
Riley had the feeling she walked in on a private conversation between Josh and Maya so she cleared her throat so that Maya would know that she was there.
Maya was startled when she heard Riley, wondering how much of the conversation she had heard.
“Hey, Riley’s awake,” she said into the phone and offered up a smile for Riley. “Yeah, we’ll see you in a little bit, love you too.”
Maya hung up the phone and looked at her best friend who had the biggest smile on her face, “what’s that smile for?”
“Maya, you told Josh that you loved him, when did that happen and when were you going to tell me about it?” Riley asked as she grabbed Maya’s hand.
“Well, you know, it just kinda slipped out one night after we got to Amy and Allen’s,” Maya answered.
“It ‘kinda’ slipped out? What’s that mean and why didn’t you tell me?” Riley asked, sounding a bit hurt.
“Riles, I’m sorry! It just happened, you should have seen how cute he was when he realized what he said,” Maya said with a dreamy look on her face.
“Wait, Josh said if first? Where were you when he said it? Did you say it back right away and how did he act when you did?” Riley was genuinely happy for her Uncle and best friend.
“So many questions, Riles! Ok. We had taken a walk one night and stopped to look at the stars and he just let it slip. He just looked at me and said that he thinks he found his Topanga and told me that he was in love with me. His face and ears turned red, he was adorable. Yes, I said it back and he had one of those Riley smiles on his face. It was the second-best moment of my life.” Maya told her as she stood up and walked to the kitchen for a bottle of water.
“Wait, second best? Shouldn’t the man of your dreams telling you he loves you be the best moment?” Riley asked while following Maya to the kitchen. “Hold on! Something else happened, didn’t it? Did you and Josh…?” Riley couldn’t finish her question because Maya’s hand was suddenly over her mouth.
Maya‘s cheeks were a little redder, but she was not discussing any details with Riley, “I’m not discussing this with you, so don’t ask, or I’ll ask about you and Lucas.”
Riley’s eyes got bigger and she was the one turning red. She pulled Maya’s hand from her mouth and turned an imaginary key in an imaginary lock and said, “not another word shall escape these lips on that subject.”
They just looked at each other and laughed. They noticed the time and decided to head to the bakery to enjoy a smoothie before the guys arrived.
They had gotten a table out on the patio and Katy has stopped by to congratulate Riley and sneak a peek at her ring, with Topanga.
As Josh approached the table he said, “Well if it isn’t the four prettiest ladies in the whole city!”
“Josh!” Riley said with an excited squeal. She stood and walked right past Lucas to give Josh a hug.
“Riley!” Josh said back. He had missed Riley a lot. When she pulled away from him he looked at her and had to admit he liked that smile on her face.
“Something sure has that smile glued to your face. Is it this beautiful ring or my roommate?” he asked with a smile.
“I should hope it’s both,” Lucas said walking over to kiss Riley.
Maya stood and gave Josh a hug and a kiss and greeted Lucas.
“Hey, Huckleberry, glad to have you and Riles back,” Maya was happy to see him.
Lucas thought something seemed off about Maya and asked for a minute to talk to Riley. Josh and Maya walked into the bakery with Katy and Topanga.
“What’s wrong, Lucas?” Riley asked.
“Is something going on with Maya, she was nice to me? She wasn’t her usual sunshiny self,” he said sarcastically.
Riley was bouncing up and down and couldn’t hold it in any longer, “she and Josh said their first I love you to each other while they were in Philly! Isn’t that wonderful?”
“And she just told you about it today?” Lucas knew that was something Maya would move heaven and earth to tell Riley about, yet she didn’t. She waited until they were both back in the city, something wasn’t right.
“Riley isn’t that a little strange, you and Maya tell each other everything,” he said to her.
Riley could feel the heat in her cheeks when she looked up at Lucas and said, “Not everything, babe.”
Lucas gave her a nervous smile and scratched the back of his head, “that’s good to know, but something isn’t right. Josh never mentioned a word to me.”
“Maybe they weren’t ready to go public with it. I did overhear her talking to him on the phone this morning about having something they need to tell us, maybe that’s it. I’m sure she’s just nervous. Can we go inside and order food? I’m starving!” Riley pulled her hand out of his and headed inside without waiting for him to respond.
Lucas followed Riley into the bakery and to the booth in the back that Josh and Maya were sitting in. Katy came by and took their orders. Josh and Riley were talking about everything under the sun and Maya would join in on occasion. She tried to keep up appearances but something was wrong. Just after they finished eating Riley grabbed his hand under the table and he looked at her. He saw the concern on her face. She knew Maya better than anyone and knew that something was terribly wrong. They both also noticed the way Josh kept wringing his hands like he was nervous.
After Katy made a final stop at their table, Riley got an idea, “How about we go for a walk? It’s a beautiful afternoon.”
Maya and Josh both jumped at the chance to get out of the bakery. The pair headed out the door before Riley and Lucas could even exit the booth.
“You see it too?” Lucas asked her.
“Oh yeah, neither one of them is acting normal. Hopefully, they’ll tell us what’s going on.” Riley answered.
The four of them walked up the stairs and crossed the street to head to the nearest park. Maya smiled when she saw where they were. This park is where she was almost arrested in the ninth grade. The statue of the children still stood and you could still make out the mural she painted. It made her feel good to know that no one had painted over her own work. She wished Farkle could be here with them, this was an important to place to her, Riley, Lucas and Farkle.
Josh had heard the story of Christopher Park a few times and couldn’t believe he was standing here. He watched as Maya, Riley, and Lucas talked about the statue and the night Maya had vandalized the park. They had all come so far since then. His eyes lingered on Maya, he didn’t know how his niece and Lucas would take their news. Part of him wanted to grab Maya’s hand and run as far away as they could get. He knew telling their parents would be the hardest but honestly, he wasn’t looking forward to telling any of them.
“So, this is the famous Christopher Park I’ve heard about?” Josh asked.
“It sure is, there’s my hope mural. I have to say, I’m kind of happy to see it still here after all these years.” Maya answered.
“This was the place we got Maya back,” Riley said.
Lucas walked over to the trio, “It sure is. Now it can be the place that the two of you tell us what’s going on with you.”
“What are you talking about, Huckleberry? Boing and I are fine, better than fine actually.” Maya wasn’t ready just yet.
“Come on, Maya, Riley overheard you on the phone. You and Josh have both been preoccupied tonight and you haven’t made fun of me once.” Lucas told her.
“You can tell us anything, we won’t judge you. We love you guys,” Riley added.
“We love you, too,” Maya replied. “We should just tell them, they are our best friends and family, this is the right place to start, Josh. “
Josh smiled at her and grabbed her hand, “I know you’re right.” He turned to Lucas and Riley, “we just don’t know what the two of you will say and don’t want you to think less of us.”
“Think less of you?” Lucas asked, “As a group, we’ve always been able to share things and if Farkle, Isadora, Zay, and Sarah were here they would tell you the same thing. We’re your friends, we know who you are. We won’t judge you.”
“It’s not like the two of you could have done anything so awful, what did you do? Run off and get married, you two wouldn’t do anything like that.” Riley said with a laugh, looking at Lucas who laughed with her. When she looked back at Josh and Maya they looked like two little kids who had been caught with their hands in the cookie jar.
“Wait a minute,” Lucas said when he saw the looks on their faces. “You didn’t do that did you?”
Josh gave Maya a questioning look, “we have to tell them.”
“How did she guess that?” she asked.
“Wait, what did you say, Peaches?” Riley walked closer to her best friend, waiting for an answer. She noticed Josh reach in his pocket and pull something out and hand it to Maya.
“What is that Josh?” Riley asked, moving even closer to the pair. She watched with an open mouth as Josh and Maya held up what appeared to be wedding rings.
“Is that what I think it is?” Lucas asked.
“I think it’s what we think it is,” Riley answered him.
They watched as Josh placed a gold wedding band on Maya’s finger and then as Maya did the same for Josh. “We got married!” Josh said, smiling.
Riley and Lucas looked on in disbelief. The two of them were standing with their mouths open, in shock.
Maya reached up and closed both of their mouths, “Surprise?”
Riley grabbed Maya’s hand and held it up to look at the ring, she did the same with Josh. She had no words. She just grabbed both Josh and Maya and hugged them.
“I guess Riley’s happy for us,” Josh said. “What about you, Howdy?”
Lucas was still in shock and didn’t quite know what to say so he just shook his head yes and reached out and shook Josh’s hand.
Riley had let go of Josh but held onto Maya a bit longer, “I don’t know what to say. I was just kidding when I said that.” She finally let go of Maya but they both had started crying. “If this is what the two of you want and if you're happy then I’m happy for you!”
Lucas finally found his words, “I’m happy for the two of you as well, shocked but happy.” He looked down at Maya and opened his arms for a hug which she accepted. I just can’t believe it, when did all of this happen. Riley was telling me about the first I love you earlier, but this is news.”
“How did the two of you pull it off and who knows and who doesn’t? What day did you get married? Where did you get married? Please, tell us everything!” Riley was bubbling over with excitement and rambling.
“We’ll tell you everything you want to know, but can we go home first, I don’t want everyone hearing this,” Maya asked.
“Yeah, let’s go back to the guy's apartment,” Riley suggested.
The walk back to the guy’s apartment took them about 20 minutes and there wasn’t much said on the way there. Once they got in the apartment, Josh got everyone a bottle of water from the fridge and everyone found a place to sit. Riley, Maya, and Josh were on the couch and Lucas was on the arm of the couch closest to Riley.
“So, tell us everything!” Riley and Lucas said simultaneously.
“Well, it all happened the day Lucas proposed to you, Riley.  After you called to tell us all the news, Josh and I decided to go for a walk. This was when he told me he was in love with me, I told you that Riles, but I didn’t tell you that he asked me to marry him, too.” Maya explained.
“We were so excited for you and Lucas, the whole family was, but I just wished that it was me that had proposed to Maya. We went for our walk and I told her how happy I was for the two of you and it kind of turned into talk about us and our relationship. Maya asked me where I saw us heading and that’s when I told her she was my Topanga and that I was in love with her. I could have stopped there but I had to tell her everything that was in my heart. I kind of got down on one knee and asked her to marry me.” Josh continued.
“I said yes! I was jealous and wished it was me announcing my engagement. We kept to it ourselves, we didn’t want to steal your thunder. The next day we were going to Atlantic City and we went to a casino that had one of those silly wedding chapels in the lobby. I looked at him and he looked at me and it just felt right. It was just us and it was perfect. We spent the night in the honeymoon suite.” Maya was blushing by this point.
“We spent the next three nights in Atlantic City and the rest of the summer sneaking around to be together. It’s been an adventure. Something I knew life with Maya would always be.” Josh said while looking into Maya’s eyes.
Lucas looked at Riley and could tell she had wheels spinning in her head. He knew that look on her face.
“Wait, no one knows, but us?” Riley asked. “What about Grandma and Grandpa? Uncle Shawn and Katy need to know. My parents will want to know and all of our friends and family. Where will you two live? You can’t keep living apart.” Riley had so many thoughts.
Josh looked at his niece and said, “Slow down, Riley. We will tell everyone, just not yet. Telling the two of you was nerve wracking enough, you made it easy on us. I don’t want to think about our parents, your parents. None of them will be happy. As for the living arrangements, Maya and I have thought about that.”
“What are you thinking, roomie?” Lucas asked.
“Josh and I want to live in the loft. It’s a bit farther from JQA for Josh but it’s closer to the gallery for me. We want the two of you to have the apartment, it’s close to NYU, the bakery, and the animal clinic. What do you think?” Maya asked.
“It sounds like the two of you thought everything through, except for one thing. My Dad will never go for me and Lucas living together before we get married and in the same building as him, no way.” Riley said.
“Riles, you're engaged and there are two bedrooms here. I know you don’t want to move back in with them and you shouldn’t have to. We’re all adults and you and Lucas are engaged now. Surely Matthews will be okay with it,” Maya was pleading.
“I don’t know, Maya. You know how he is.” Riley just didn’t think he’d go for it and Lucas would be stuck with an apartment he couldn’t afford on his own.
“Riley, he may just go for it. Remember me telling you about what your dad, Auggie, and Josh pulled on me when I got home yesterday? Your dad said something to me. He told me no more stealing my shoes, that he was done. He knew that you and I belong together.” Lucas told her.
“Hmm, I wonder if he really meant it?” Riley asked, she had an idea but didn’t know if Josh and Maya would go for it. “I’m fine moving in with Lucas as long as you guys tell everyone that you're married. It’s the only way it will work. You do it tonight, I don’t want the two of you spending any more nights apart.”
Maya looked at Josh, “What do you think? We can video chat with your parents beforehand and then have my parents and Cory and Topanga here and tell them, Zay and Sarah, too. We can tell Farkle and Smackle, as well. It will be morning in Australia soon. I’m tired of walking on egg shells.”
“Let’s do it, Mrs. Matthews!” Josh said as he kissed her.
“Oh, no!” Riley said
“What is it, babe?” Lucas asked her.
Maya was concerned by the look on Riley’s face, “Riles, what’s wrong?”
“I just realized that you’re my Aunt!” Riley said. “You told me in the seventh grade that you would be my aunt one day and now you are.”
“Don’t worry Riles, I would never make you call me Aunt Maya, but once you and Huckleberry get married, he has to,” Maya said flashing a sinister grin to Lucas
“Great, just great!” Lucas said, shaking his head.
“It’s okay, roomie, I already told you I’d never make you call me uncle!” All Josh could do was laugh.
“Yeah, thanks for that, at least,” Lucas didn’t find any of it humorous.
 Four months had passed since the day Josh and Maya had told Riley and Lucas about their marriage. They did what Riley had asked them to do that night and told their family and friends the truth. Everyone was surprised and happy for the young couple. The only person that was unhappy about it was Shawn. He was happy that Josh and Maya were together, but he was upset because he had been robbed of walking Maya down the aisle to give her away at a wedding. That was something he had looked forward to ever since he adopted her. Riley couldn’t stand to see Shawn upset so, Riley, Lucas, Zay and Sarah threw an impromptu wedding and reception for Josh and Maya. It was held on the roof of the Matthews building. Riley was the maid of honor and Lucas was the best man. Maya walked down the aisle on Shawn’t arm and he happily handed her over to Josh. Cory performed the ceremony and got a little teary eyed. It turned put to be a perfect day.
Josh had moved into the loft with Maya and they were happier than they had ever been. The only real problem Josh had with living in the loft were the frequent visits from next door neighbor, Zay. Even Sarah couldn’t stop him.
Cory Matthews didn’t have any concerns with Riley moving in with Lucas, it seems he meant what he said to Lucas. Of course, that didn’t stop him from dropping in on them at random times of the day and trying to give them as much trouble as possible.  He only did it because that’s what everyone expected from him.
 Sunday, December 31, 2023, 8:00 p.m. At the apartment of Riley Matthews & Lucas Friar
It was New Year’s Eve and time for Riley’s annual party. This year she and Lucas were hosting in their own apartment, it was going to be a much smaller gathering than previous years. Just the two of them and Zay, Sarah, Maya, and Josh. The real party would be held next weekend when Farkle and Smackle were due back from Australia. The gang couldn’t wait to see them, they had genuinely missed the geniuses.
Riley had just finished getting dressed and walked into the living room when she heard the speaker box. It was Zay and Sarah. Lucas had buzzed them up and opened the apartment door. Lucas turned on some music while Riley was putting some food out on the coffee table.
“Time to get this party started, Zay and Sarah are here!” Zay said as they came through the door.
Lucas greeted them and said, “it’s not that kind of party this year Zay, it’s just the six of us tonight. The big party is next weekend, remember?”
“Yeah, I remember, I was just trying to liven the place up. It’s kind of quiet in here.” Zay answered.
Riley walked into the room and hugged both Zay and Sarah. “Things will liven up once Maya and Josh get here. Plus Lucas and I have a surprise planned.”
Zay elbowed Lucas in the side, “What’s the surprise?”
“I’ve been sworn to secrecy, she’ll hurt me if I tell you,” Lucas told him.
“Can I talk to you in private for a minute?” Zay asked Lucas.
“Sure, let's go out in the hall,” Lucas suggested.
“No, I don’t want anyone to over hear me and with Josh and Maya on their way, I don’t want to risk it,” Zay said, he was being too serious.
“We can go out on the fire escape if you want, is that private enough?” Lucas asked.
Zay nodded his head, yes and Lucas turned to tell Riley where he would be.
“Is Zay okay?” Riley asked Sarah.
“I guess, he’s been acting weird all day. He’s a little jumpy and won’t tell me what’s wrong,” Sarah said.
“That’s not like Zay, maybe he’ll be in a better mood after his talk with Lucas?” Riley was trying to ease her mind.
Out on the fire escape, Lucas asks Zay, “What’s up?”
“I need your help, man. I have something I’ve been wanting to do since Christmas and I just can’t get past my nerves.” Zay explained.
“What are you up to, Zay?” Lucas was curious.
Zay reached into his pocket and pulled out a box, he held it up for Lucas to see. All Lucas could do was smile from ear to ear. He knew what was in that box.
“May I?” he asked.
“That’s why I’m holding it up like this.” Zay was in no mood.
“Calm down, Zay.” Lucas could only smile. He took the box out of Zay’s hand and opened it. It was a beautiful solitaire diamond ring with a smaller diamond on each side of the center stone in a white gold setting. Lucas smiled and handed the box back to Zay. “Sarah’s a lucky girl, why are you having so much trouble with this?”
“My nerves just get the better of me and I can’t get the words out, what if she says no?” Zay was honestly worried about that.
“Zay, this is Sarah we’re talking about. She’s been waiting for you to pop the question since Texas. She loves you and there is no way she’s going to say no.” Lucas thought Zay was just overthinking things.
“Are you sure?” Zay asked.
“I’m 100% sure that there is no way Sarah Carpenter will say no to your proposal, man,” Lucas answered, giving his friend a pat on the back. “I’ll give you an opening, kind of like we did with Yogi last year. You just get right in there and say what’s in your heart.”
“That sounds like a plan, just hope the words come,” Zay said.
“The day you can’t find the right words to say or any words for that matter is the day I don’t ever want to see. Lucas said with a laugh. “Can we go inside now, it’s kind of cold out here? Josh and Maya should be here soon.”
They walked back inside of the warm apartment and sure enough, Maya and Josh had just arrived. Zay greeted his friends and sat on the couch next to his girlfriend. He smiled at her and took her hand in his, “Sarah, I’m sorry for how I’ve been acting today, I’ve just had some things on my mind and needed Lucas’s opinion on something. I promise I’ll be on my best behavior for the rest of the night.”
Sarah was happy to hear that whatever was bothering him had passed. “Anything you want to share with me?”
“I promise that you will know what’s going on with me by the end of the evening, ok?” he said.
“If you say so, baby,” Sarah said with a smile. She wasn’t too sure about it but she was going to stick it out.
They spent the next two hours watching a movie and talking among themselves. At 10 p.m. Riley called for everyone’s attention and said that she and Lucas have an announcement.
“Lucas and I have a surprise for all of you,” She grabbed Lucas’s hand and was just about to speak when the door bell rang,
“Who could that be, everyone that’s supposed to be here is already here,” Riley said, as Lucas walked to the door and used the peep hole. He turned and looked at everyone with a big smile.
“I think we’ve just gotten a delivery all the way from Australia!” He said with a huge grin on his face.
“Australia, what do you mean, Huckleberry?” Maya asked, everyone, got up and walked toward the door.
“Open the door Lucas, don’t keep these people waiting,” Riley said. Just as she was about to open the door for him, he opens it and none of them could believe what they were seeing on the other side.
“SURPRISE!!!” the two of them said at the same time! Farkle Minkus and Isadora Smackle were standing in the door way.
Riley walked over to them and grabbed Isadora’s hands, squeezing them to make sure she was real, “You’re really here?” she grabbed one of Farkle’s hands, as well and sure enough they were both there.
“You bet we’re real, Bubbles!” Smackle said. Riley pulled both of them through the door and took a turn hugging each of them. “We just got in and this is the only place we wanted to be.”
Maya was next to hug Farkle, “I’m so glad you got to come home a few days early, we’ve missed you so much!”
“It feels great to be home Maya, or do I have to call you Mrs. Matthews?” Farkle joked.
“You only call me Maya, Smackle I have to say, it looks like Sydney was good to the two of you,” Maya said.
“It was we had so much fun in the city and enjoyed it so much. It appears that marriage has been good for you and your Boing. I’m very happy for you Maya.” Smackle added.
“Thank you, Smackle. I have to say I do like being married,” Maya said.
While everyone was greeting Farkle and Isadora, Riley noticed Lucas standing back and enjoying the reunion.
“Did you know about the two of them returning early?” she asked him.
“I did, Farkle texted me this morning and told me that the two of them were on their way home and should be back in the city, just in time for the new year. It was their idea to come here before heading to their own homes. “ Lucas explained.
“We’re all together again, isn’t it wonderful, this night just keeps getting better and better. Speaking of, do you think they are ready for our surprise?” Riley asked.
“I think they are, want me to get their attention?” he asked.
“Yes, please.” She kissed his cheek in thanks.
Lucas used a whistle he always used when he was working with the horses on Pappy Joe’s ranch, needless to say, it worked like a charm. He had everyone’s attention in no time.
Riley started over, “As I was saying before Farkle and Isadora’s wonderful return, Lucas and I have a surprise for all of you…”
“I’m sorry Riley, is it okay if I have the floor for a moment? I won’t take long.” Zay interrupted
“Uh…sure, Zay, if it’s that important.” Riley couldn’t believe the night she was having, It must not be meant for her to make this announcement tonight.
“Hey everyone, first I want to say that I’m very happy that Farkle and Smackle are home from Australia and that topping that surprise might be a little hard, but I’m going to try.” Zay took a deep breath and took Sarah by the hand and pulled her to the middle of the room between the living room and dining area.
Sarah had no idea what was going on but maybe this is what has had Zay on edge all day.
“Sarah, thank you for coming back into my life. It was just a little over a year ago, wasn’t it? You were just getting out of a bad relationship and I was, well I was looking for someone. I wasn’t sure at the time who that someone was going to be, but then I ran into you at the bakery. We reconnected that day as friends and after a while, we connected as something more. I thank God every day that you are here, I love you, Sarah. I never experienced real love until you. I thought I knew what it was all about, I mean look around us, these people in this room accepted me into their lives and have shown me the true meaning of friendship and how it can blossom into something stronger and much more meaningful. I think that describes us, we were friends in middle school and high school, but then we weren’t, then we were. That grew into the love we share now. I love you, Sarah Carpenter and you’re my best friend and I want to spend the rest of my life with you.” Zay paused.
“What?” Sarah couldn’t believe what he was saying.
Zay pulled the ring box from his pocket, opened it and got down on one knee. “Sarah Jane Carpenter will you marry me and spend the rest of your life with me?” he had tears in his eyes and Sarah was speechless.
Riley was in tears and there was no way she could be mad at Zay for the interruption. This was way more important than what she and Lucas had to announce. Maya and Smackle were crying as well and Farkle, Lucas, and Josh couldn’t help but smile.
Sarah looked around the room to see that everyone was waiting for her answer, she looked at Zay down on one knee in front of her and knew that this is the moment she had been praying for.
“Yes, Zay. I will marry you!” she said through tears.
There was clapping and cheering going on from the group of friends gathered in the apartment but all Zay could see was Sarah. He stood up and took the ring from the box and placed in on her left hand, he gave her a kiss and she hugged him.
Lucas and Riley were the first to congratulate them. Zay accepted the hug Riley offered him.
“I’m sorry to ruin your surprise, but I’ve been trying to do that since Christmas, you're not mad at me are you?” Zay asked.
“I could never be mad about that. I’m glad you did it here in front of all of us. I’m so happy for the two of you, I love you, Zay!” Riley told him.
“I love you, too, Riley. Thank you.” Zay gave her another hug. Of course, Lucas was right there behind Riley, ready to offer his best wishes to his brother.
Sarah was busy showing off her ring to others, she had a beaming smile on her face.
“I thought you were going to wait for me to give you an open, man. I guess you couldn’t wait any longer, huh?” Lucas had one arm around Riley’s waist and the other was around Zay’s shoulder.
“You were right, I was letting my nerves get the better of me, I just felt like if I didn’t do it right then, that I never would,” Zay said.
“I think this calls for some of that sparkling grape juice you bought, Lucas,” Riley suggested.
“What, no champagne?” Zay asked with a smirk. He knew all about Riley’s last experience with champagne.
Riley could feel the heat in her cheeks at the mention of champagne, all she could do was playfully punch Zay in the arm.
Riley followed Lucas to the kitchen to get the plastic champagne flutes out for him to pour the sparkling grape juice in.
“I’m so happy with the way this night is turning out, aren’t you? Farkle and Izzy are home to stay and now Zay and Sarah’s engagement, it’s all wonderful.” Riley said as she put the full glasses on a tray.
“It’s a pretty good evening, I’m sorry we haven’t gotten to share our surprise yet. But ours will keep a day or two if we don’t get the opportunity tonight.” Lucas wanted to reassure her.
“I know, but I think we should tell them, they’d be upset if we didn’t.” Riley wanted them to know their news, so badly.
They carried the filled glasses into the living room and Lucas made a toast, “I know it’s still an hour and a half until midnight, but this night couldn’t be any more perfect. Welcome home Farkle and Smackle, we have missed you more than we let on and are happy to have the two of you back in the city. Congratulations, Zay and Sarah, we wish you a lifetime of love and happiness, here’s to you.”
“Nobody dare take a drink, we have one more surprise to come and I think we would need another toast and more grape juice, so let's hear what Riley and Lucas’ surprise is before we drink, this is their party after all,” Josh said.
“It’s okay, it’s nothing nearly as exciting as what’s already happened. We can tell you tomorrow,” Riley said.
“No, my best friend has an announcement and we’re all going to put our glasses down until we hear it,” Maya walked over to Riley and took the glass from her hand. “Go on, Riles, tell us what it is.”
“Okay, Maya. Thank you. It’s just that everyone has been asking us if we have set a date for our wedding yet and we just wanted to let you all know that we have finally done it. I will become Mrs. Lucas Friar on July 20, 2024.” Riley was glad that was finally out.
There was one more round of applause and Josh shouted, “To Riley and Lucas!” while holding his glass in the air.
“Now you can drink!” Maya announced and so everyone drank.
It turned out to be a night none of them would never forget, just before midnight the 8 friends went up to the roof only to be greeted by Cory, Topanga, Auggie, Ava, Shawn, and Katy. They all counted down to midnight and each couple kissed then everyone sang Auld Lang Syne.
Riley stood with Lucas as the fireworks went off, “look at all of these people, Lucas. Our family and friends all gathered to start another New Year. Did you think way back in the 7th grade that this would someday be our life?”
He smiled at her and thought about the all the years that had passed since she first fell into his lap on the subway. He had hope that one day they would be together, he just didn’t know it could be as wonderful as it actually was.
“I had hope for us way back then, City Girl. There was only ever one time I almost lost hope. But we made it and we’re here with people that mean the world to us. We have a pretty great life and it can only get better,” he looked down at her to see tears in her eyes.
“I’m glad that brother stuff and triangle mess is behind us, it’s ancient history now. I never wanted to hurt anyone, I just thought I knew what I was doing. I’m glad that we get to walk through this life together and I can’t wait to be Mrs. Lucas Friar. She reached up to kiss him like she did so many years ago and he gladly returned that kiss.
 Seven months have passed since New Year’s and so many things have changed in the lives of Riley, Lucas and their friends. First and foremost is the fact that Riley, Lucas, Maya, Farkle, Smackle, Zay, and Sarah have all graduated from college! Pappy Joe, Marcus and Lily Bradford, Jesse and Jack Meyer and Grandma Gandy all made the trip from Texas to witness the occasion. Big changes were coming for the Friar family as Lucas’ parents have decided to move back to Texas after the wedding. Pappy Joe spent the month between Lucas’ graduation and the wedding in New York. His relationship with James stronger than ever. Pappy Joe also spent as much time with Riley and Lucas as he could. He took to city living pretty easy and enjoyed the sights of the city.
Lucas was accepted into the veterinary program at NYU. He was excited to be closer to his dream. Riley got a job at Abigail Adams High School teaching English and would start in the fall. She was excited to see if she could have the same impact on the lives of her students as her father had on hers. She was also excited that she would get to have Auggie as a student. Poor Auggie had to deal with his father and his sister as his teachers.  Maya and Josh were getting ready to celebrate their first wedding anniversary, Josh was still teaching at JQA and Maya had some luck selling her art online, but was helping her mother at the bakery in the meantime. Farkle had decided that since he had a degree in business, he was going to change his field of study to science, that was his first love. He’d go to school and work part time for his father. Isadora was going to continue her education right along side Farkle at Princeton. Zay was working hard rehearsing for his new Off Broadway gig and Sarah had landed a job with a large event planning firm. Oh, just so you know she ended up pulling off the wedding of the year, Darby and Yogi were married on Valentine’s Day in a beautiful ceremony. Yoby really is forever!
 Saturday, July 20, 2024, the roof of the Matthews and Friar apartment building
It was a beautiful wedding ceremony on the roof of the apartment building, everything from the flowers to the dresses the girls in the bridal party wore was perfect. It was a small wedding, their closest friends, and family in attendance.  Riley chose a beautiful ivory lace, knee length dress that was sleeveless and had flowers in her hair that had been put in a beautiful up do. Her matron of honor and bridesmaids wore beautiful knee length turquoise dresses with purple accents. The guys all looked handsome in their gray suits. Of course, Riley had asked Maya to be here Matron of Honor with Isadora and Sarah serving as her bridesmaids. Lucas had his two best men, Zay and Farkle by his side, along with Josh. Auggie and Ava were a bit old for the ring bearer and flower girl, but that is what they were happy to do for Riley and Lucas. Her parents cried as they walked her down the aisle and gave her away to Lucas. Once the officiant had pronounced them husband and wife, Lucas didn’t even have to hear the words before he was kissing his beautiful bride, the whole crowd cheered for them.
After the ceremony, the chairs were moved and the food was served buffet style. Riley wouldn’t let Sarah talk her into hiring a caterer for the wedding. Riley knew exactly who she wanted to prepare the food and since Pappy Joe was in New York, his cook/housekeeper, Ellie was free for the job. She brought along her cowboy Sam to help her serve the food and Riley was happy they could be there. After the food was served everyone got a chance to say something to the bride and groom. Everyone had beautiful words to say to them. Pappy Joe stood to speak and actually ended up reading the beautiful letter he had written for Riley and Lucas’ engagement, there wasn’t a dry eye in the place. Riley had noticed some cookies next to the cake when they cut it, they were her favorite snickerdoodles that Zay’s Grandma Gandy had brought with her from Texas.  After all the amazing food and beautiful words, it was time for dancing, Riley and Lucas had their first dance as husband and wife.
As they swayed to the beat of the music Lucas whispered in her ear, “Are you happy, Mrs. Friar?”
She smiled up at him, “This is the happiest day of my life, I can’t believe we’re finally married. I’m so happy everyone is here to share this day with us, I don’t think it can get any better.”
He gave her his best devilish grin, “Oh it can get better, later when we’re alone, on our honeymoon.”
“You never did tell me where we were going or is it a surprise?” Riley asked.
“It’s a little cheesy, but we’re going to Niagra Falls. I could only get a couple of days off, one of the other techs asked for 10 days of vacation time, so we have to stick close to home. I figure we can do the whole boat ride and all, they say it’s really beautiful.” He explained.
“I’m sure it is, and I think it’s perfect, who needs Paris or even Cabo like Yogi and Darby. Besides we already had Paris, she said with a laugh.
“Someday, Riles. I will take you to France, I promised you, remember?” he asked.
“I remember,” she answered. Just as she laid her head back on his shoulder she heard someone clear their voice.
“May we have your attention,” it was her father. Everyone was standing around him.
She and Lucas stopped dancing realizing they were who he was talking to.
“Dad, what’s going on everyone is supposed to be dancing,” she told her father.
“There is plenty of time for dancing after you and Lucas open your gift,” Cory said.
“Dad, we asked for no gifts, there’s only a card, we decided to open it later,” Lucas added.
“Luke, listen to your father-in-law, would you, son.” James Friar told his son.
“Come on niche, do what your dad said,” Eric Matthews was smiling at his niece.
“Ok, Uncle Eric, Lucas and I will open the card. I don’t see what’s so important about one card,” Riley complained, “but if it means that much to all of you, we’ll open it. Where is it?”
“Right here, Riles,” Maya said, handing the card to Riley.
Lucas took the card from Riley’s hand and opened the envelope. Inside was a beautiful generic greeting card, “On this, your wedding day we wish a lifetime of happiness,” Lucas read.
He opened the card and there was a nice verse inside and something written in Topanga Matthews’ perfect handwriting, “We hope that happiness follows you through all the years that you spend together. Much love, Us.”
Riley took the card from him and started reading what her mother had written, “We know the two of you asked for no gifts, but we wanted to give you something extra special for your wedding day, we all got together and pooled our money and are able to spring for an all expenses paid trip to Paris, France.”
She looked up with tears in her eyes and handed the card to Lucas, he read the words again but still didn't comprehend it. He looked at her and they looked at their family and friends.
Zay figured the newlyweds needed a little help, he walked over to them and put a hand on each of their arms and said, “This is our gift to you, each of us pitched in, obviously some more than others” he gave Farkle a pretend evil eye. “The two of you do so much for all of us that we wanted to do something special for you. Besides, Lucas did tell you once that the two of you would go to Paris someday. We cleared it with the doctors at the animal clinic, you have 10 days and Mr. Minkus is giving you the use of his jet, you leave out of JFK at 9 o’clock tomorrow morning.
Lucas and Riley stood there listening to what Zay was telling them, but it didn’t feel real.
“Is this really happening?” Riley asked.
“I think so,” Lucas answered.
Zay pulled an envelope from his suit coat and handed it to Lucas, “all of the arrangments have been made. Car from the airport, hotel, cash, even your passports are in here, you can finally use them. All the information you need is in here.”
Riley still in shock started walking around the room hugging everyone and thanking them. “I can’t believe all of you would do this for us, you’ll never know how much it means.”
Lucas finally accepted the envelope from Zay and hugged his best friend. He started thanking everyone as well. This was a dream come true for them and he didn’t quite think words were enough, “Thank you all so very much, this is our dream and you all have made it come true.” Riley finally joined Lucas.
“We are so blessed to have every single one of you in lives, we love you!” she had no more words.
Someone started the music again and Lucas pocketed the envelope and took Riley into his arms, “How do you feel now, Mrs. Friar?”
“I feel wonderful. I’m the happiest I’ve ever been in my life and I owe it all to you, Lucas. Thank you!” Riley said,
“You don’t have to thank me, Riley, I love seeing you happy,” he told her.
“You’ve done your job then, before today the happiest day of my life was the day you asked me to be your wife in front of that Paris, Texas Eiffel tower,  our weekend in Paris. But our wedding day trumps that, it’s been the perfect day and we get to top it off with a week in Paris. Now no matter what, we really will always have Paris.”
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storm278 · 7 years
Text
Home is where the heart is CHAPTER 3
10 years after college, Riley has gained a reputation of being a flight risk. Her friends and family have tried to stop her from taking off but truthfully there is only one person that can make her stay for good. what happens when riley sees said person for the first time in 14 years. Rucas centric
Rated T
Cross posted to Fanfiction.net here
Prologue Ch 1 Ch 2
A/N
The time jump happens a little later in this chapter
Italics are flash backs
Two days after the dinner, Riley left New York. Meanwhile back in Texas Lucas came back to his house exhausted from work to see Zay cooking up a feast in his kitchen.
"Well isn't this a nice way to end the day" Lucas said gawking over all the food
"Well hello to you too"
"Ah ribs" Lucas was fixing to pick one when Zay slapped his hand away
"Hands to yourself till I'm done oh and my trip to New York was fine by the way" he turns back to his matched potatoes "so impolite"
"sorry buddy how was New York?" Lucas hops on the kitchen island
"Good" that's when Lucas finally cleared his heard of work and looked around him. Zay never cooks for him voluntarily and this wasn't just regular dinner it was a freaking thanksgiving feast
"Uh-oh good? Just good? Zay how was New York or more specifically what did you do in New York"
"Nothing have some casserole man, you look tired you should take a shower and then come back and have some turkey" Lucas opened the oven and saw the huge turkey cooking "You made me turkey? Zay seriously what's going on"
"I was hoping to get some comfort food in you first but I guess that plan's out the window now" Zay put the casserole down. "I have some news and before I say what it is I want you to know that I'm always going to be there for you buddy; whenever you need me" He exhaled "I bought a restaurant'
"Zay that's awesome congratulations" Lucas gave his friend a bro hug "so what's the problem"
"The restaurant is in New York man. I'm moving back home to be with V" Lucas was taken aback by this, but Zay has been there by him for way too long so now it was his turn to do the same
"Man that's great for you and V. So you got the ring already?"
"one step ahead of you on that one" Zay explained while showing Lucas the engagement ring for Vanessa
"Is that your grandma's ring"
"Yea, I'm gonna miss you buddy"
"same here, I still can't imagine you leaving Texas for good"
"it was bound to happen at some point" both boys started digging into the ribs "I mean I will always love Austin. I've spent a lot of my life here but as ma always says home is where the heart is; mine just isn't here and I hate to break it to you buddy but neither is yours, not anymore" Zay was hoping and praying that Lucas will catch on to what he was insinuating.
"What are you talking about"
well I guess everyone is in denial this season Zay thought
"Really? do I have to spell it out for you" Zay said with raised brows
"I mean I guess Austin isn't like it used to be since we both went to New York, but it's home for me now; The ranch is here"
"Yea right ranch man. Okay just answer me this, apart from me or the little family you still have here who else in Texas do you talk to; like really talk to, and not about work now, I mean the personal stuff?" Lucas thought for a minute
"I guess you're right on some level. With the whole gang in New York, I guess I never really met new people because you were here"
"wow dude blame the best friend" Zay feigned taking offense
"Oh you know it's true, but dude you know I'm going to be in New York in couple days anyway. I told you that"
"Oh yea, your new clinic how's that going"
"Everything is set and ready. I have great partners over there. I just need to get professional cleaners for the floors before opening day"
"When's that" Zay asked with barbeque sauce smudged on his face
"Next Monday and here" Lucas passed him a napkin "wipe your face"
"You know when I said home is where that heart, I wasn't just talking about the gang right"
"Zay stop!" Lucas warned
"Be mad at me all you want but you know I'm right. I don't even need to mention her name Lucas; It's been 14 years and all I have to do is say an expression and your mind goes straight to her…"
Lucas spaces out and recalls past memories; Riley and Lucas are in an empty classroom back at Abigail Adams high school
'How am I in the wrong here. You are the one who keeps icing me out, keeping huge secrets from me, even right now you won't look me in the eye' Lucas said highly frustrated
'If you can't see that I kept this from you to protect you from getting hurt then I don't know what you want me to say here"
'Damn it Riley! What the fuck!" He ran his hands through his dirty blonde hair "Say something that makes sense to me, because lately it's like I'm fighting with a brick wall. You punch and punch and it never hits back"
'Ok so I'm just going to leave you and your brick wall' Riley tapped on the walls of the classroom 'to finish your conversation because I'm tapping out of this' She starts walking out of the classroom
'Wow Riles you're just going to walk away real mature of you'
Zay snaps his hand in front of Lucas' face "Hello? Earth to Lucas"
"hmm sorry"
"I bet you she was the center of whatever you were thinking of"
"You don't know what you're talking about" Zay rolled his eyes at this. The doctor got up and picked his suit case up to go shower "Look man I'm gonna go freshen up, would you please make a plate for me"
"Sure whatever you want. You know you can run but you can't hide away forever. Riley might not be there right now but she will come back and so should you plus you love it in the city"
"Whatever Zay" Lucas shouted from down the hall.
GMWGMWGMWGMWGMWGMWGMW
A year and a half later
Maya, Josh and Melvin are at JFK waiting for Riley at her arrival gate. Maya was way too excited she started bouncing on her spot waiting for her best friend. Melvin even had a cute sign that read 'welcome back aunt Riles'. Her plane just landed so they were just waiting for her to get through customs. Riley came out and immediately ran to where she spotted the blond artist.
"Peaches!" Maya jumped into her arms like her she use to do when they were kids "Peaches I missed you so much" Riley said
"I missed you too honey" that's when Riley noticed her little nephew and his sign
"oh hey there Mel, you are growing up too fast on me now" she picked him up, pecked his cheek and spun him around, the little boy giggled and it melted Riley's heart "Aunt Riles I missed you". Melvin kissed Riley's cheek
"I missed you too Mel" she put the little boy down and hugged her older brother.
"Welcome home sis, how was Canada"
"Surprisingly not as cold as I imagined" All four began strolling out of the airport heading to Josh's jeep.
"Yea I could have guessed Vancouver wouldn't be as bad as New York weather wise" they all got into the car and Josh started driving back to their parent's house
"ah I miss the city, and the bagels just wish I wasn't homeless though"
"Whose fault is that, I showed you five different places and you rejected them all" Josh said
"Josh be nice" Maya playfully smacked him
"Yes Josh be nice to me, plus I didn't get a good vibe from the places you showed me, they just didn't have the homey feeling I want"
"That's because you were looking at them through a computer screen" Josh countered
"Same difference"
"Honey sorry you had to lose your pent house, at least your parents are happy to take you in" Maya said while Riley rolled her eyes
"oh don't remind me"
"Riles! you know mum and dad miss you. You have no idea how excited they were when they found out you would be living with them again" Josh said
"I love them don't get me wrong, but I don't think dad's ever going to let me move out again. You remember when I was to leave with Sarah after graduation"
"can you blame him, you were literally going on exile I still don't know why and how I let you go" Maya said
"Maya it happened years ago you're gonna have to let it go sometime"
A thought hit Josh and his eyes widen "That reminds me Maya, as you can see Riley came back alone so pay up"
"what!" Riley scream "you guys bet on my love life, are you shi-" the brunette stopped herself because there was a four-yea-old sitting next to her
"Thank God she has filters and technically I didn't lose; the bet said I lose if Riley comes back single I hate to break it to you sweetie but she ain't single" the blonde explained
"No I'm her brother I would have known about that" Josh said to Maya
"is this happening right now" Riley said to herself because to her it was clear Maya and Josh had lost it
"Sorry sweetie you lost the bet about seven months ago. Nathan landed New York yesterday so actually you owe me a twenty so pay up"
"that's still going on, I thought they would have ending things by now" Josh peeped at his sister through the rear view mirror while Riley had her arms folded arms looking out the window
"yea apparently it's still on, and even better he's a fellow New Yorker so lover boy decided to move home with our girl"
"Riles is this true?" Josh asked
"Oh me? You mean I actually exist in this conversation go figure"
"Someone's in a mood, common riles, Josh and I were just having a little a fun" Maya said with puppy dog eyes to Riley
"did you guys really bet on this" Maya's hands went up "hey I bet on your relationship staying together"
"Joshua!" Riley punched his shoulder
"ow! sorry Riles, I wanted the twenty" the brown eyed boy said rubbing his shoulder
"Peaches would you come house hunting with me next week, I think I'm just going to buy a place this time"
"Riley are you sure you want a house. I mean it's going to be just you in a big house" the blonde said with panic in her voice
"I didn't mean a house kinda house I meant something like the pent house I lost"
"Oh sure honey" Maya had a mysterious smile on her face because she and the genius Farkle had a full proof plan to ensure Riley never left the country again and the blonde had all her fingers and toes crossed that this would work.
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Family separation returns under cover of the coronavirus
U.S. officials are fighting in court to take the three children and deport them to El Salvador — to no one. 
WASHINGTON — 
Dad lives about 10 miles from the White House, stringing together gardening jobs, not letting the kids touch him when he gets home for fear of contagion.
Mom lives in a makeshift refugee camp on the border in Matamoros, Mexico, one of the world’s most dangerous cities, rationing soap.
Three of the children — ages 10, 14, and 16 — just joined their father, Jose, after winning release from a government shelter where they had been held for more than two months. Now, they have deportation orders hanging over their heads.
U.S. officials are fighting in court to take the three children and deport them to El Salvador — to no one. The only way to avoid being separated from their parents, officials say, would be for their mother in Mexico to give up, too. Government lawyers said they’d put her on a plane with the kids if she agreed to return to El Salvador and never again try to join her husband in the U.S.
This is the new family separation, two years after taking kids from their parents at the border blew up into a crisis for the Trump administration. Citing the coronavirus to seal the border to an unprecedented extent, the administration is engaged in a pressure campaign against immigrant parents to get them to give up either their kids or their legal claims to protection in the U.S.
Scores of migrant families across the country are being targeted, according to court documents and more than 20 officials, judges, lawyers and migrants. Many spoke on condition of anonymity for fear of jeopardizing their legal cases.
The fates of many of them may hinge on Jose’s family’s case, which has become a test of the administration’s latest policies to bar migrant kids and families, said Claudia Cubas, the litigation director for the Capital Area Immigrants’ Rights Coalition, and Jose’s lawyer.
With Jose’s family’s case the furthest along in the courts, “this is either going to make it or break it for people,” she said.
This is the new family separation, two years after taking kids from their parents at the border blew up into a crisis for the Trump administration. Citing the coronavirus to seal the border to an unprecedented extent, the administration is engaged in a pressure campaign against immigrant parents to get them to give up either their kids or their legal claims to protection in the U.S.
Scores of migrant families across the country are being targeted, according to court documents and more than 20 officials, judges, lawyers and migrants. Many spoke on condition of anonymity for fear of jeopardizing their legal cases.
The fates of many of them may hinge on Jose’s family’s case, which has become a test of the administration’s latest policies to bar migrant kids and families, said Claudia Cubas, the litigation director for the Capital Area Immigrants’ Rights Coalition, and Jose’s lawyer.
With Jose’s family’s case the furthest along in the courts, “this is either going to make it or break it for people,” she said.
Jose’s three daughters — ages 16, 14, and 11 — are about as tall as he is. The 10-year-old boy doesn’t leave his father’s side.
In less than a year, the two oldest girls and their little brother have gone from safe-houses in El Salvador to a tent on the Rio Grande to a government shelter, and now to a home in a Washington suburb with a green lawn, a bicycle and a driveway.
Jose mostly speaks for them. He still doesn’t feel safe, even in the U.S.: MS-13, the gang in El Salvador that told his wife they’d kill the kids if she didn’t tell where he was, has offshoots in Maryland.
“There’s still this sadness in them,” Jose said of his children. “The biggest change that I’ve seen is that now that we’re here, it’s like they can breathe again.”
In El Salvador, Jose was a street preacher. The gangs ordered him to stop, but he wouldn’t. He met his wife, who also proselytized, at their evangelical church. MS-13 had killed her first husband, the two eldest girls’ biological father, in 2006.
Jose fled first, thinking the threats to the family would lessen if he were gone. He crossed the border with his youngest daughter in Laredo, Texas, just short of one year ago. The decision to come separately — they couldn’t afford to bring everyone at one time — has splintered the family in the U.S. immigration system.
Jose told U.S. officials at the border that he was afraid of persecution in El Salvador and was allowed to go to Maryland, where he has a brother and close friend. 
By the time Jose’s wife and the three other kids arrived at the border about three months later, the Trump administration had imposed its Remain in Mexico policy across the entire southern border, dramatically changing the rules. Officials turned the four back to Matamoros.
In January, an immigration judge in Texas denied their asylum claims. Jose’s wife believed the judge said she could not appeal without a lawyer. 
In roughly four months in Matamoros, the kids had “suffered physical and sexual assault; endured illness, extreme temperatures, and malnutrition,” according to a legal filing. Ten days after the judge ruled, Jose and his wife decided she should take the children to the bridge and send them across the border on their own.
Many parents have chosen to take that chance rather than risk keeping their children in the refugee camps along the border. Of some 65,000 migrants subject to Remain in Mexico, at least 1,114 have been kidnapped, raped or assaulted in Mexico, including children, according to Human Rights First. Of asylum seekers subject to the policy, fewer than 1% have ultimately been granted relief.
On Jan. 17, the three children turned themselves in to U.S. officials at the port of entry between Matamoros and Brownsville, Texas, and were designated as unaccompanied minors, affording them special protections under the law, including a hearing before an immigration judge. 
As soon as officials located Jose, he applied for custody. But the reunification stalled when the government discovered the kids had prior removal orders dating from the ruling against them and their mother in January.
Cubas and the children’s legal team sued for their release in March. The case has moved through the immigration system and federal court. 
For already traumatized children, Cubas said, “it’s been an emotional roller coaster.”
In the little boy’s legal declaration — in El Salvador, the family moved so much to hide from the gangs that he never learned to read and can hardly write — he says he doesn’t really remember what happened after they crossed into the U.S. “because I’m little.”
“I miss my mom I don’t know what is happening to her,” he said. “I don’t want to return to Mexico because it is a bad place and in El Salvador the gangs are after us.”
Their mother now lives alone in a blue-tarp tent in Matamoros.
“It’s just me left here,” she said in an interview last month.
The camp, which exploded in size with Remain in Mexico, has no cleaning materials or private bathrooms. Many people bathe in the muddy Rio Grande, where her three kids once saw a dead body floating. Sickness is rampant.
Public health advocates and experts have warned that a coronavirus outbreak in the migrant camps along the border would be devastating. 
The mother is not so worried for her kids anymore, now that they’re in Maryland with Jose. She says she talks to them every day.
The legal battle over the children has left Jose trying to play the part of both parents amid a pandemic. He takes as many precautions as he can.
“I have to provide for them,” he said, “but then I’m exposing myself.”
He’s even more worried for his wife in Mexico. So long as they’re apart, he said, “I have this gap in my heart.”
On May 8, lawyers for the government submitted a proposal for Jose’s family: 
If the children agreed to “their expeditious and immediate repatriation to El Salvador” and withdrew their suits against the government, and if their mother presented herself at the border, ICE would deport them together to El Salvador, “thus, ensuring that Plaintiffs remain in the care of a parent.”
But, they warned in a footnote, should Jose’s wife try to pursue her immigration case, they could send the kids to El Salvador alone.
“To be removed with her children, Plaintiffs’ mother would have to immediately elect an expeditious reunification and joint repatriation with her children,” they wrote, “and choose to forego further action.”
They are far from the only family to be presented with such a choice; a very similar case involving two sisters, 8 and 11, unfolded recently in Texas.
The girls crossed the border by themselves after their father was mugged in Matamoros, where they’d been required to stay under the administration’s policy after seeking asylum last September. Their mother, who entered the U.S. on an existing tourist visa and is also applying for asylum, is in Houston. Thirty minutes before the girls were due to be reunited with her, ICE moved to deport them to El Salvador.
After lawyers filed suit, the girls were released to their mother. ICE has agreed not to deport them until a decision by the immigration appeals court — but they still have removal orders.
“This is another form of family separation, and it’s quite in your face,” said Elizabeth Sanchez Kennedy, immigration legal services Director at YMCA International Services, who represents them.
At a hearing in early May in Jose’s family’s case, federal district Judge Randolph D. Moss said he was “troubled” by the government’s effort to “orphan” the children. 
“The plaintiffs here are very young,” Moss said. 
“You’re taking a nine-year-old child, removing that child from the parent and sending that child to a place in which the child has no guardian.”
With the judge questioning the constitutionality of separating Jose’s family, ICE said it would hold off on deporting the children until November or a decision by the immigration appeals court. That allows Jose time to pursue his separate asylum claim.
Getting a hearing, however, is no easy feat, with already backlogged immigration courts thrown into further chaos by the coronavirus. Already, Jose has been waiting close to a year for the Baltimore immigration court to schedule one. 
Ashley Tabaddor, president of the National Assn. of Immigration Judges, noted that the administration repeatedly has pushed back Remain in Mexico hearings while insisting that unaccompanied children continue to attend court during the pandemic.
“It’s clearly more driven by law enforcement priorities than health considerations,” Tabaddor said.
Meanwhile, ICE’s stay is at the agency’s discretion; Jose’s kids still face removal orders. If he ultimately wins asylum, he likely could include his children, and potentially their mother.
In Matamoros, she said she will never allow her children to return to El Salvador.
“My wish is to be with my children there in America one day,” she said. “But if it is my turn to return, I have already lived my life. They are just beginning to live.”
Times staff writer Patrick McDonnell and special correspondent Cecilia Sánchez contributed from Matamoros and Mexico City.
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christfollower75 · 4 years
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My life in and out of Christ.
Jesus has done so much for me. I was born and raised in a Baptist Church so I was brought up in knowing about God. It was not until my late teens that I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior at church camp. I came from a poor family. My dad was a deadbeat dad that abuse me mentally and physically. My mom was a good Christian woman that tried to keep peace in the house. When I got into highschool I ended up with the wrong crowd. Started smoking pot and drinking. I'm still going to church. In church I was in choir the bus ministry and puppet ministry. I grew my hair out to shoulders length and the pastor told me if I did not cut my hair I could not be in any of the ministries. So a few weeks after that my mom sister and I went to another Baptist Church and became members. I joined the choir. Went there for about a year and when I decided to get a buzz cut. The pastor told me I could not be in choir because I had a punk hairdo. I quit going to church after that. By this time my dad had left us and joint a carnival helping build and tear down moving town to town. I was still hanging out with the wrong crowd at school. Skipping school smoking pot, drinking and having what I thought was fun. I did graduate high school. After high school I got arrested for not paying my speeding tickets. For getting into fights. I got married. I was 21 at the time. She grew up in a Pentecostal church. I started going to church with her. This was the first time since I was 19 step in foot back into a church. The marriage lasted 3 years. We had a daughter together. Then one day I got arrested for a car I did not steal. I spent three and a half months in County jail before even seeing a lawyer. I did not see the lawyer until I was finally bailed out by my girlfriend after my first marriage. We went to court and the charges got dropped. After that I ended up moving out of Amarillo to Vidor Texas. I was still smoking pot and drinking. I am about 26 then. One Wednesday evening I was heading to the liquor store when I saw a bright flash of light coming the right side of my car I looked over to see what it was and I saw a church. Instead of going to the liquor store I went to church. It was a non-denominational. This was the first time I ever really felt welcome at a church just as I was. I lived in Vidor for a year before I got a letter from my dad telling me he had triple bypass surgery. Right then I packed up my stuff and moved to San Angelo Texas to be with him. I forgave him and made amen ds with him. There I met a friend and we started hanging out and drinking and going to bars. One night we went to a bar and I'm at this wonderful lady. We dated for about a year and ended up getting married. We have a son together. I did not go back to church in San Angelo. 2005 my dad ended up dying of lung cancer. My wife was going to ASU and San Angelo to be a school teacher. She ended up getting a job here in Austin so in 2008 we moved here. The shortness story up a little bit one Sunday morning I had turned on the TV and there was a church service going on from Shoreline Church. I believe this was in 2009. A few months went by before I ended up going to Shoreline Church. I rededicated my life to Christ for the first time since ask Jesus to come into my heart when I was 16. At Shoreline I am team lead over the parking lot team. My mom passed away in 2017 of uterine cancer. My son had epilepsy but is now fully cured of it. I am no longer drinking and smoking pot. I have now been married for 14 years. I have a healthy 14-year-old son and a healthy 22-year-old daughter. During this pandemic I am at peace. I know God has got this under control and I know God has my life in his hands. I know I have had my ups and downs through life. But God has always pulled me back to him. A bright flash of light or turning on the TV and there's Shoreline Church. God has answered so many of my prayers throughout the years. I hope this helps you out. God bless 😇
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str0ngerafterall · 5 years
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The end.
When I was 14 I thought that nothing would go my way. That day, I thought my life was over and that was my first attempt. I ended up in the hospital and my parents found my letter. I was only a freshman in High School mind you. Since then, I really tried my best to work on myself. Fast forward almost 7 years later and I feel like I'm in the same boat, but now I really understand where my sadness really came from. Will this be the end today? I honestly don't know. But  I always knew that I'm able to express more in writing than my words.
To my parents:
     I'm sorry I was never your golden child. But here's the reality, your choice to force me to move to Texas was the worst thing you could ever do for me. You know what you did, you were being selfish. You thought you were benefiting me? No, you weren't, you honestly made my life worst. You ever realize since we moved here you never told me ONCE that you were proud of me for anything? Have you realize why I never came to ask you for advice or talk to you because you know .. I'm your daughter? Its because YOU ALWAYS CRITICIZED MY MENTAL HEALTH AND YOU ALWAYS MADE ME FEEL EVEN MORE hatred for showcasing any emotion. That's why our household was always broken. It wasn't me. It was because of both of you.  Remember when you guys fought like every other year to the point that I thought someone was literally going to kill themselves or each other? I literally had to pull it together why? Why would a 10-year-old, or a 15-year-old or an 18-year-old need to see that REPEATEDLY in their lifetime? You guys always manipulated every situation, in my opinion, you guys never opened your eyes and saw how broken I really was. You guys never helped the situation you only made it worst too, in the end, benefit your selfish ways.  You thought you brought me here to Texas because there were more opportunities? You brought me here to restrict me. You took all the opportunities I could have in NYC and forced me to work harder for something I knew at a young age I had in arms reach. You told me my mood changed since I came back from New York and you wanna know something. You’re right it did change cause it opened my eyes and saw how lonely I was. For 3 whole years, one person held me together and it took those 3 days to see that there is someone in the world who really does care about me. I came back from that trip and yes I was depressed cause I'm ALONE HERE. Since I met him, He talked to me every day. EVERY DAY since I moved here, helped me through my panic attacks, attempts and made me feel like a damn person unlike anyone in this god damn family. So, dad remember when you asked that question if you are doing something wrong? Yes, you did something wrong. You never saw how broken you made me. I haven't really eaten in a month. Every time I try to eat, whatever I eat. I puke it. You ruined me because you were selfish. Mom, we were never close, and now I see why. We never shared the same opinions but the reality is you were either angry or depressed and you only wanted to buy and shop. You only thought about making yourself happy and that was it. When you never got your way,  you would manipulate me or dad for your own ways. Don't try to deny it. You know what you've been doing. I think all the “love” you try to showcase was fake and disgusting in the end and that's the truth. You guys w
To Steven:
      I'm so grateful that I met you when I came here. I'm always in debt for the memories of watching football with you or your little parties. Or the idea of you slipping into this family. I'm sorry that we never got to go to a Cowboys and Giants game. That would have been such a memorable time. If anything happened to me, I would want you to tell J for me. He has gotten used to you and I'm happy about that. I rather him hearing the news from you than my parents to be honest
To Angie:
     I’ve known you since 6th grade and you will always be my sister. We found our love for Big Time Rush and you became my concert buddies for so long. From there we decided to be Harley and Joker for Halloween and I wish we were able to do more. We celebrated our birthday as much as we did. I'm sorry that we weren’t able to celebrate our 21. Just know I tried my best. I tried my best for so long. I will always love you okay. You made such an impact as we grew up. -Your worldwide girl.
To JJ:
    You would be thinking, why I would be writing a letter to you although we haven't talked as much since H.S. Well the reason why is because once you knew what I was going through you tried to save me. I'll always be appreciative for that. I'm sorry I didn't fight harder.  I'm sorry that I’ll never get to see A4 or Captain Marvel. I'm sorry that Id never gets to meet Chris Evans or Sebastian Stan. I'm sorry I let you down as well.
To J;
“When every life meets another life, something will be born”
     In the end, I can never really thank you enough for what you did for me. You fell in love with me when I was broken. I never thought that little ole me deserved to be loved. I could never thank you enough for keeping me motivated for so long. You were the only one that gave my life some kind of purpose. When you send me the winter soldier hat and then the Captain America bear. I knew I was worth something, I'm sorry it took so long for me to say “I love you” I feel like If I said that earlier or if I just opened my god damn eyes we wouldn't have had that fight.  Then that thing with her wouldn't have had happened. Then I wouldn't have had those nightmares or anxiety attacks of losing you. I'm sorry for not saying it earlier. I was honestly scared of you leaving me, every time I said that to someone they always left. But you, no matter what stayed. I'm sorry for not being strong enough babe. I know for a fact you are my true love, and you are my soulmate. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. I wanted to walk down the aisle in a white dress and see you cry tears of joy. I wanted us to write our wedding vows and end it with “I'm with you till the end of the line” .I wanted us to dance to “Dangerous Love” by 3STM. I wanted to go on coffee dates with you.  I wanted to travel with you.  I wanted to go to all the comic cons with you. I wanted to celebrate all of our birthdays together. I wanted to grow old with you. I wanted to have children with you. I wanted to be happy with you. You made me happy. You were the ONLY  one who made me happy. I wanted to make your mom so happy knowing her son found the one. I wanted to cuddle with T’challa. I wanted to kiss you when the clock struck 12 on New Year's Eve. I wanted to open Christmas gifts with you. I wanted to have pokemon battle dates. I wanted to binge all the Marvel Movies and hear your wild conspiracy theories on what could have happened. I wanted to dress our family up as the Avengers so badly. I wanted to have a house that is decked out in Marvel and DC with Funkos and other merch. I wanted us to create so many memories together. My idea was that once I left Texas and spent the rest of my life with you, I’d have no more worries. I wouldn't have to cry myself to sleep every night with the thought of losing you. Or waking up to the idea of the world hates me.  I love you more than anything. I never thought in my life that I’d find another soul so pure like yours. I know for a fact that there will be moments where I feel like I need to give up. But I know you never gave up on me. I just feel like Im in this battle alone sometimes because of the distance. In the end, You changed my life. You’re right. “The sun will shine on us again”
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alwayssummerblog · 6 years
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Kacey Musgraves & Ruston Kelly - Romance Review
Kacey Musgraves has had one hell of a year! Not only has the country sensation toured with Harry Styles, but her fourth studio album Golden Hour has received high praise from both fans and critics alike, along with multiple nominations across several award shows. To top it all off, Musgraves is celebrating her first anniversary being married to fellow artist, Ruston Kelly on October 14!
Having the benefit of getting to watch some of their love story play out in public, it’s safe to say that as Kacey and Ruston were falling for each other, we were falling for them as well. And, even luckier for us, the couple has been generous enough to let us into some of their more personal moments, from the story of how they met to their stunning fall Tennessee woodland wedding. With their one-year wedding anniversary right on the horizon, we’re celebrating a year of Kacey & Ruston Kelly with a brief timeline of their romance. Here’s to the everlasting union of two of music’s brightest songbirds!
A Chance Meeting
As it seems to always go, the country starlet wasn’t “looking to date” when she met her future husband. “I decided to go to the Bluebird one night for a writers’ round, which I never do because it’s so touristy,” she recounts in a July 2018 interview with Hits Daily Double. Note for the non-Nashvillians, the Bluebird Café is a legendary club famous for its’ remarkable writers rounds. “I didn’t go with anyone, and I was sitting by myself at a table. Ruston played his first song, and I was just stunned by everything in it—the words, the melody, what he was saying. I was just sitting at this table, crying.” 
In another uncharacteristic move for her, Musgraves was compelled to introduce herself to him, “Hey, I don’t really ever do this, but here’s my number; I really wanna write with you.” Flash forward from their March 2016 meeting to the date they had finally nailed down for a write, May 11. A fateful day indeed, the songwriter explains their first “date” with only the beauty and imagery she could. “The second Ruston walked into my house, I felt like Dorothy when the colorized part happens in The Wizard of Oz. We didn’t even write a song. We just talked, and talked, and talked. He didn’t leave until like 3am. It was the easiest, most natural thing in the world—and I didn’t want it to stop.”
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I NEVER KNEW LOVE COULD BE THIS FUN (Photos by @kellychristinesutton, of course!)
A post shared by K A C E Y M U S G R A V E S (@spaceykacey) on Dec 25, 2016 at 7:19am PST
“I NEVER KNEW LOVE COULD BE THIS FUN”
Once the two found each other, they never looked back. Only months after meeting, they knew they had found a home in one another, illustrated by the caption on a photo Kacey posted of the two in July, relatively early in their relationship, “with all the craziness that is plaguing the world it feels nice to have a little bit of quiet land to come home to and rest my heart.” 
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with all the craziness that is plaguing the world it feels nice to have a little bit of quiet land to come home to and rest my heart.
A post shared by K A C E Y M U S G R A V E S (@spaceykacey) on Jul 7, 2016 at 9:34pm PDT
The newfound stability fostered incredible works of art. Known for writing stories from others perspectives, Kacey was asked if her husband had any impact on the deviation from her typical style on latest album Golden Hour. She responded, “I'm living in a much more positive light now. It’s maybe opened my heart a little. And I realized maybe I’ve been a little over-[self] protected. Maybe I can let loose a little more, trust more in the songs, what I have at home and out here.” Needless to say, it wasn’t long before Kelly popped the big question, in an incredibly thoughtful and sweet display in her childhood bedroom, surrounded by loved ones, during Christmas break. The caption of an Instagram photo Musgraves posted of her brand new engagement ring says it all, “I didn't say yes...I said HELL YESSSS!! Last night, the best man I've ever met got down on one knee in my little pink childhood home, in the same room I played with my ponies and barbies and asked me the easiest question I've ever been asked. ❤I finally know what everyone means when they say "you just know”.
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I didn't say yes...I said HELL YESSSS!! Last night, the best man I've ever met got down on one knee in my little pink childhood home..in the same room I played with my ponies and barbies and asked me the easiest question I've ever been asked. ❤ I finally know what everyone means when they say "you just know".
A post shared by K A C E Y M U S G R A V E S (@spaceykacey) on Dec 25, 2016 at 7:16am PST
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We had just been at my parent's house randomly having a night of watching bittersweet old home tapes of all these beautiful family memories that were made in this little, old country house I grew up in that I now have. We came back to that house afterwards and he had somehow pulled off having my sister + brother in-law sneak off and completely decorate my childhood bedroom in the most nostalgic and perfect Christmas decorations. I was bewildered and confused when I saw it all and turned around and the song "Two For The Road" by Henry Mancini started playing (this song is so emotional and sweet..it's one of my favorites..you have to go listen) and he was on his knee with a baby pink velvet ring box and the sparkliest thing I've ever seen! 💖Then my sister busted in and captured it all with her camera. It was so beyond special. Of all the places in the world I've gotten to see, nowhere could mean more than this happening in tiny Golden, Texas in the house that completely made me who I am.
A post shared by K A C E Y M U S G R A V E S (@spaceykacey) on Dec 25, 2016 at 7:38am PST
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Perfection 💍😭💕 Thank you, my love.
A post shared by K A C E Y M U S G R A V E S (@spaceykacey) on Dec 25, 2016 at 12:26pm PST
Woodland Wedding
Their wedding was reflective of the couple itself, intimate, family-oriented, and anchored by nature. In her own words, the bride recalled, “Saturday, in a sacred place where two rivers meet and join together, I married my best friend, barefoot and surrounded by the deepest kind of magic and love that exists. I've never felt so tranquil and happy. We made our promises to each other under the trees and then drank and danced into the night. We couldn't have done any of it without the help of our wonderful families and amazing friends.” The groom added that it embodied, “The best kind of magic. Best day of my life.”
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Saturday, in a sacred place where two rivers meet and join together, I married my best friend..barefoot and surrounded by the deepest kind of magic and love that exists. I've never felt so tranquil and happy. We made our promises to each other under the trees and then drank and danced into the night. We couldn't have done any of it without the help of our wonderful families and amazing friends. PHOTO BY @nbarrettphoto ............................. [extra massive thanks to Melissa and @evan_tate of @photowagontx + @bowsandarrowsflowers and crew for coordinating/planning/florals/styling and making everything a reality + @jbamn for the funny, personal and beautiful officiating, @peytonfrank, @allikdesign @unclecarl13 @leeuwnashville @thekindcake @indahevents @silveroakcellars Hair/Makeup by @carlenekmakeup + Ali at @thedryhousenashville We love y'all!] ❤️More to come.
A post shared by K A C E Y M U S G R A V E S (@spaceykacey) on Oct 17, 2017 at 7:30am PDT
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The best kind of magic. Best day of my life. 📷: @nbarrettphoto
A post shared by RUSTON KELLY (@rustonkelly) on Oct 17, 2017 at 7:30am PDT
The photographs show the whimsical wedding we dreamed that Kacey Musgraves would have. Complete with bio-degradable confetti, a photo trailer, and a grassy aisle, the small gathering had less than 100 guests and only one bridesmaid and groomsman, their sister and brother respectively. Our favorite feature? The photos of family members that adorned the wall above the guest book table. See some of the beauty for yourself in these photos posted on Marth Stuart Weddings HERE.
The Release of Golden Hour
In the same thought from the Hits Daily Double interview quoted earlier, the artist elaborates on how meeting the love of her life changed her entirely, and therefore her music. “I’ve never had love songs or relationship songs. I write about other things, other people’s stories or perspectives. When you’re with someone you truly love to the core and they feel that way about you, there’s no sense of panic—or that it’s going to come apart.” All one would have to do is listen to the album in its entity to hear all the impact Ruston has had on its’ creator. Later, she reiterates, “I love love. So much I’ve never expressed it inwardly in the songs. Now that I’m with someone who loves me no matter what my flaws are, it’s a whole other thing. And you see it even more clearly.” 
That support from Ruston radiates, ahead of Golden Hour’s release he told his Instagram followers, “There is nothing more attractive than someone continually striving to master their craft. Allowing your creative output to evolve synonymously with who and where you are in your life is essential to the artist who gives a shit about the quality of their platform. But when surrounded by a popular musical climate that encourages complacency and awards the mediocre, it is truly a brave feat. Ever the does-what-she-fucking-wants creative woman, she knows what’s up. As a comrade, I strongly champion this new wonderful work.” Talk about a supportive spouse!
Collaborating on “To June, This Morning”
The newlyweds had the opportunity to participate in an homage to icon Johnny Cash through a project titled, Forever Words. Kelly once posted on his Instagram sharing with his followers, “Last night [Kacey] and I sang "To June, This Morning," a poem written by Johnny Cash in 1970. I had started to put music to this 12 years ago and forgot about it. Kacey and I revisited it recently and finished it in like 6 seconds. Finding the love of your life can make words like that come alive. It will be released on the upcoming "Forever Words" project featuring several artists singing Johnny Cash poems. We feel um VERY LUCKY.” 
In an incredible interview with Rolling Stone Country, the only son of Johnny Cash and June Carter Cash expressed his appreciation that Kelly brought the song to his attention, according to the interview “having seen it himself in a memorabilia book while he was a teenager.” He goes further to comment, “Here’s a young couple running parallel lives with where my mother and father were. In that vibrant, excited point where there is all that hope.” And that there is plenty of, just watch the video they released to accompany the music, the two are full of love for each other.
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The Release of Dying Star
6 months following his new wife’s fourth studio album release, Ruston Kelly celebrated the September 7 release of his debut album, Dying Star. And like his wife, finding the love of his life had a monumental impact on him as an artist and his craft, and discussed this earlier this year in an interview with Sounds Like Nashville, “She really helped me pick up some of those pieces and remind me that what I’m doing is important and to understand what I need to do to pick myself back up.” He calls her “that classic receptive feminine force in a man’s life.” Adding that they bonded over “talking about art and music and also doing things the way you were meant to do them and not being apologetic whatsoever about it.”
Now that doesn’t surprise us.
While we’re only able to highlight a few of the major public moments from this power couple, we know there are countless we’ve missed and even more to come. We patiently await the numerous artistic benefits the union of two super-songwriters brings. With both artists busy promoting their latest releases, they are forced to spend most of that time apart, something they understood from the start. Kacey is currently out on her Oh What a World Tour, spanning Norway to the UK before traversing the US. 
As for Kelly? He’s playing a number of fun festivals and shows over the coming months, some tickets to which are available HERE. 
We’d like to congratulate one of our favorite country music couples one last time on a blissful first year of marriage, and toast many more to come. Please, do continue keep us in the loop!
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Auto Insurance question!!1st car, Mitsubishi eclipse?
"Auto Insurance question!!1st car, Mitsubishi eclipse?
im getting a mitsubishi eclipse for my 1st car but im going to be payin for half of the insurance on it and i want to know if it'll be considered a sports car under the insurance.it'll be between a 1995-1999 and one of three models(RS,GS,GS-T).im pretty sure the gs-t is a sports car but what about the other two? the insurance will already be high enough being a teenager and a male so i just want to make sure if any one of those would not be considered a sports car under car insurance.thanks for the help.and plz no smartasses talking about oh no another teen driving they really need to get that law change blah blah.just people that will help.o yea im in texas if that would make any difference
BEST ANSWER:  Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://freeautoinsurance.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr 
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What is a good health care insurance provider for self employed people?
What is a good health care insurance provider for self employed people?
Will your insurance go up with a Seat belt ticket?
In Georgia, will your insurance go up if you get a seat belt ticket with statefarm insurance?""
Question about healthy families health insurance?
is it true healthy families cuts off the insurance for you when you turn 18??? im gonna turn 18 in a week and i need to go to the doctor. will they cut off the insurance?
Why buy life insurance if you are young?
What is the benefit of buying life insurance if you are young and not married and have no kids?
Auto Insurance question!!1st car, Mitsubishi eclipse?
im getting a mitsubishi eclipse for my 1st car but im going to be payin for half of the insurance on it and i want to know if it'll be considered a sports car under the insurance.it'll be between a 1995-1999 and one of three models(RS,GS,GS-T).im pretty sure the gs-t is a sports car but what about the other two? the insurance will already be high enough being a teenager and a male so i just want to make sure if any one of those would not be considered a sports car under car insurance.thanks for the help.and plz no smartasses talking about oh no another teen driving they really need to get that law change blah blah.just people that will help.o yea im in texas if that would make any difference
""Moving from Texas to Arizona, how will it impact family auto insurance?""
I have auto insurance with my family who lives in Texas, but I am moving to Arizona. Right now my insurance is on a family plan which has multiple vehicles as it is much cheaper than if I were to get the car insurance by itself. If I register my car and license in Arizona, will the insurance agency not allow me to continue insurance with my family as we're in different households and states? Insurance agency is Metlife if that helps.""
Will admiral beat an online quote if I phone them?
Ok, So i've been quoted around 1000 for my insurance through the admiral site, I was wondering if they would beat that quote if I phoned them and spoke to them over the phone. Or are online deals always better?""
Child only health insurance?
I have done some research and haven't been able to find any decent child only insurance. My daughter is four months old, and we are looking to insure her in the state of Connecticut. What insurance companies supply insurance for just her? Thanks!""
Cheapest florida car insurance?
i only want liability and im looking for really cheap car insurance please help
Is there affordable health insurance for pregnant teen girls?
i need any kind of reliable resources. please help.
Help! driver's license and auto insurance?
so I just got my driver's license (im 18), but i don't have a car yet. im driving my mom's car, is that ok? do we need to call the insurance comany and tell them to add my name to our car insurance? do we need to pay extra money? thanx for ur time! p.s. we r in Maine""
How much insurance would be if i bought a 1994 honda civic dx?
i am 18 and i plan on buying a car next year so i just wanted to know how much insurance would cost
Affordable Health Insurance?
I was in a pedestrian accident earlier this year. The case has since been settled and I was awarded $25,000. That was the maximum insurance the driver had, after lawyer fees, etc., etc., I didn't end up with much. I am unable to work and have no health insurance. My back is still scarred. Everyday, all the time it aches. I stopped treating with the chiropractor because he was making me feel worst the entire 2 months I treated. I need prescriptions and medical attention period! I have about $4,000 left, but I am unemployed and do not want to continuously dip into my savings. Since my lawyer has been paid, I seem to be of least concern.""
What could i expect to pay for insurance being a first time driver?
Hi, im looking to buy my first car with some money im getting from school; it will be used of course but i would like to know if anyone can give me insight on insurance costs. I will soon be 21 years old, have had a license for about a year and a half, and i have one accident on my record (possibly) that happened almost a year ago while driving my sister's car; and i was not listed on thier insurance as a driver does that make a difference? With all that being said how much could i expect to pay for insurance? Oh and i live in Philadelphia,PA if that helps with answers. Also what additional fees should i expect to encounter outside of insurance? Thanks!""
Life insurance for seniors over 75yrs?
Whats the slim chance that their is a company out there that provides life insurance for a Senior over 75 and has had and removed cancer in the past 12 months? None i bet huh?
Insurance screwed me over so my motorcycle got impounded.?
(If you want to know how I got screwed then just ask but here is my question..) I got a GSXR 1000 a week ago and it got impounded this past Saturday.. I'm going tomorrow to pick it up, and I'm wondering what will happen if I get there and the bike has scratches or it's been dropped.? Will they be held responsible to get it fixed or my insurance company because they screwed me over or myself?""
How can a full time college student over age 26 get health insurance?
What are our options?
Car Insurance Temporary Additional Driver???
I already have a car insurance policy with Churchill. I am doing a very long journey this weekend and want to Insure my boyfriend for 3 days to help me with the drive. Is it possible to put someone on an existing policy for 3 days?? I take it there would be a cost involved.
Speeding tickets and insurance?
If I just got a ticket for speeding today and would like to take it to court, will it appear on my insurance statements right away or do I actually have to be found guilty and THEN it will appear on the statements?""
How much does car insurance cost?
I am 17 years old and looking to get a car immidiately, althought I've only had my G2 for a week. I'm looking to buy a 2door Pontiac sunfire, anywhere from 1998-2002. My dad is a single parent, with one vehicle, and a perfect driving record. How would me and my dad go about to find thr cheapest insurance possible? Would I be the primary driver on the car? How much does teen insurance under a parents insurance usually cost per month and year? THANK YOU! EASY BEST ANSWER GETS 10 :)""
How much would insurance cost on a 1996 wrx?
im buying a 1996 wrx as a first car ( red P's), it cost $16,000. how much would the insurance be?""
Car Insurance?
how much car insurance do i pay for a 6000 dollar car
Will I be paying two deductibles or one for two car accidents different insurances?
Hi, Today I hit a car that is of a stranger and we exchanged information about each other's insurance. That person's insurance company and mine are different. We didn't ...show more""
""Roughly, how much would it cost to insure a 17 year old for a motorcycle?""
Hey, I'm sixteen, and live in Birmingham, England. I'm thinking of buying a geared, 125cc motorbike for when I am seventeen. I have looked around for insurance quotes, but none are straight forward, and as I don't have a bike yet, I can't get a very accurate one. I understand the only way to get a quote is to simply ask an insurance dealer, but I just wanted a simple, rough figure to get a price range for my self. If anyone can give me any information on price or how to get insurance, that would be greatly received. Thanks if anyone can help.""
Auto Insurance coverage -- How much Liability and Medical?
I got a couple of questions about about auto insurance coverage. Namely, what's the best amount of liability and medical coverage to select. 1) For the liability, I know it's wise to get the best liability that one can afford to cover your assets. But how about if one also gets umbrella coverage. For example, if one gets an umbrella coverage at a $2 million limit and the liability limit for the auto insuarance is $300,000 or $500,000, does it make sense to select the $500,000 or is it better to select the $300,000 limit since the umbrella coverage would kick in? 2) for medical, is this redundant coverage and not needed because wouldn't the liability portion also cover medical expenses? Or is it wise to get this, for example, if a passenger is not insured (no health insurance), so the medical part would help out in that case? Thanks.""
What would be my annual AND monthly insurance cost for me to own a car in my name?
What would be my annual AND monthly insurance cost for me to own a car in my name?
Car Insurance: Driving Parents Car?
I have Insurance With State Farm on my vehicle. Currently it is being repaired and I have no car. I need to drive a car to get to work and school. They have State Farm also, but on a different policy. Both Insurance policies say Uninsured motorist on the card. I live in North Carolina (insurance is required) Could I drive my parents car? If I get pulled over what will happen?""
How much does is cost to insure a motorcycle?
i am a 21 yr. old female in so cal. it is a ninja 250r, never been in an accident, & it is kept in the garage!""
Lapsed car insurance ?
I never received bill or warning in the mail or phone call from my agent. Either they made a mistake or my parents thought it was junk mail. Over 6 months have gone by. Should I call my agent or the insurance company? I figure rates will go up even though I didn't do anything wrong.
What is the best auto insurance company?
i live in Chicago, Il and whant 2 know the best auto insurance company.""
Auto Insurance question!!1st car, Mitsubishi eclipse?
im getting a mitsubishi eclipse for my 1st car but im going to be payin for half of the insurance on it and i want to know if it'll be considered a sports car under the insurance.it'll be between a 1995-1999 and one of three models(RS,GS,GS-T).im pretty sure the gs-t is a sports car but what about the other two? the insurance will already be high enough being a teenager and a male so i just want to make sure if any one of those would not be considered a sports car under car insurance.thanks for the help.and plz no smartasses talking about oh no another teen driving they really need to get that law change blah blah.just people that will help.o yea im in texas if that would make any difference
https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/nebraska-health-insurance-providers-ashley-bray/"
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My weekly challenge was to remember my favorite song from five years ago and listen to it. I have no idea what I was listening to five years ago but it certainly was not on the top 100 from July 2013. I had an idea, a better idea, and I went back 40 years to when I was 16; the summer between my sophomore and junior years in high school. That was the summer of all sorts of memories.
This week’s challenge was to go back 5 years and listen to my favorite song – have no idea – decided on going back 40 years to the summer of 78 – 40 years ago! @fiveminutejournal
A post shared by Clay Watkins (@makingthedayscount) on Jul 1, 2018 at 1:59pm PDT
This past Sunday afternoon, we drove north. I had a driver for the first hour and the last hour. My daughter O is working on her driving hours and loves driving. It gave me time to go back in time – 40 years – to the summer of ’78. I checked the top 40 from July ’78. I recognized most of the top 10 but my memory took a jolt when I read #14 – Miss You by the Rolling Stones. That song took me back and brought back all sorts of memories and I found my song…. But first… how I got there.
I turned 16 in November ’77, but I couldn’t get my driver’s license I hadn’t completed the required behind the wheel driving training. Instead of taking driver’s ed during the summer, like all of my peers, I had been visiting by dad in England for five weeks. I took the driver’s training during winter break of my sophomore year and was ready to get my license in January of ‘78. January in Houston, Texas is cold, but not nearly as cold as January where I now live – there is no comparison.
I am the oldest in my family, so I was the first of the kids to get my license and the first child to teach my mom all sorts of lessons she and her sister probably did not teach their parents when they were growing up in the fifties.
When my parents divorced, my dad moved to Saudi Arabia and a year later he and my step-mom moved to London, England. Whatever he had, he took with him or put in storage except for the 1969 blue Volkswagen Beetle. It was stored in the garage. I had my name on it. Or rather, I had put my name on it.
this is my car, but it looked like this…it even had some very cool pinstripes
For a 16-year-old boy in 1978, having your driver’s license is cool, having a car a car is even cooler. Once I got my license, I began to drive the ‘blue bug.’ I could drive to work and back and had to ask permission beyond that. The little blue bug had air conditioning, but it didn’t work and the radio had AM only. I had a job and made minimum wage as a busboy and dishwasher at my next-door neighbor’s Italian restaurant.  By March, I had scrimped and saved enough money to purchase an in dash 8-track cassette player and FM\AM radio and a couple of speakers for the blue bug. I had barely enough money leftover to buy two 8-track tapes – I picked Van Halen’s debut album and Jackson Browne’s Running on Empty. I listened to those constantly.
The blue bug was nothing brag about. Beside the AC not working, there was a hole in the passenger side floorboards caused by battery acid spillage. A friend of my mom’s helped with a fix and  the radio and speakers were an improvement. To make up for the lack of AC the blue bug had side windows which could tilt inward and force air into the car. But driving it in the hot Texas spring and summer was pretty uncomfortable and perspiring was the norm.
I finished my sophomore year and summer arrived.
I don’t know how I did it, but I convinced my mom to let me drive with my younger brother Warren to Lake Travis near Austin, Texas for the fourth of July weekend. A couple of my friends were going camping and asked me if Warren and I could go. It’s a little more than 200 miles from Sugar Land to Lake Travis. I don’t know why my mom let me go, but she did.
Warren and I packed the car and took off. As brothers, Warren and I weren’t very close at the time. He was closer to my youngest brother David. We ere all the same distance in ages apart – 17 months. But, I was two grades ahead and at the time I had been in high school for a couple of years and he was going to be a freshman that fall. We had common neighborhood friends, but two years is a big difference. We took off in the late afternoon and I don’t remember the exact route we took, but whatever route we took, it took us through La Grange, Texas.
By the time summer had arrived, my 8-track cassette collection had grown and I owned a variety of tunes including The Rolling Stones’ Miss You and Joe Walsh’s Life’s Been Good to Me and more. We jammed the 8-track and kept the windows down to keep cool or as cool as a hot Texas summer evening can be.
We reached La Grange and it was dark and I don’t remember seeing the 35 mph speed limit sign, but I certainly remember the patrol car’s lights behind mine.
I pulled over, turned the music off, and said my ‘yes sirs’ and ‘no sirs The officer asked me how fast I was driving and I replied, ’45.” But I didn’t sound convincing. He told me that I was driving 48 mph in a 35 mph zone and wrote the ticket for me. He reminded me to keep the car at the speed limit, gave me my ticket, and let me go. I thanked him and we were on our way.
We arrived safely and without further incident. We had a good time at Lake Travis as only teenagers could in the summer of 1978. We camped, swam, and went boating under the supervision of no one.
That summer was a summer of discovery and the soundtrack included a variety of music but I was probably listening to ‘Miss You’ by the Rolling Stones, or ‘Life’s Been Good to Me’ by Joe Walsh, or it could have been Van Halen’s ‘Girl You Really Got Me Now” or Jackson Browne’s album “Running on Empty. I don’t know, but I am sticking with ‘Miss You’ by the Stones.
I was grounded from the car for a week when I told my mom about the ticket. I could drive to and from work and that was it. I survived that summer and started my junior year of high school a few weeks later. Little did I know how much my life would change in the coming year. I had the blue bug until it caught fire while I was driving it on my way home from college Memorial Day weekend in ’82.
I listened to all four albums on the drive north Sunday afternoon and early evening. The sounds brought back memories. When ever I hear any of those albums I think of that drive to Lake Travis and the summer of ’78. I even smile when I think of that first traffic ticket. Still.
It’s the 29th day of summer break and the 22nd day since my surgery. Every day is a better day. Doing my exercises, working on getting stronger and more flexible. It’s been a great summer. We’re at the lake for a couple of weeks. I can’t go in, just watch from shore. But there is still plenty to do. I can read a book, watch the birds, cook, clean, fold laundry and all sorts of things. It’s been a great day already. Making the Days Count, one day at a time, one favorite song at a time.
What were you listening to 40 years ago? Or if you can’t remember that far back, what is one of your favorite summer song memories?
Day 29 – Miss You My weekly challenge was to remember my favorite song from five years ago and listen to it.
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ralphmorgan-blog1 · 7 years
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How I Got Sent To Rehab For Being Too Gay
Flickr / rabble
I grew up as a sassy little boy in Arkansas. My parents separated when I was three or four years old and had an ongoing custody battle for me and my two older sisters until my seventh birthday. I was raised by my sisters, who had to grow up far beyond their years at such a young age. While they were raising me, my parents would use us as pawns in their game against one another. Wed be carted from one parent to the other every other weekend, despite our tears, screaming, and demands for all this to stop. It wasnt our choice; the court had ordered it.
Ive always known that I was gay. In fourth grade I told my best friend that I was in fact a bio-sexual. Yes, I said bio-sexual, and I remember explaining to him that that meant that I liked both boys and girls. He looked at me for a moment, as if planning his next move, and he promptly said that he didnt want to play with me that day. I went home, and the next day I told him that Id just been joking. Though he accepted my excuse, he became my enemy when he rode his bicycle down the street, called out my name, and then spat in my face. Rage filled me as I stomped down the pavement after his bicycle, grabbing at his backpack in anger. It was then that I realized that Arkansas was not the best place in the world for me. I had to get out.
It wasnt until I was 14 years old, after I had read Harry Potter and done copious amounts of research, that I decided that I wanted to go to boarding school. My mother was against these sorts of ideas, coming up with all manner of excuses, including telling me that I was going to die and that Id never see her again. My father, on the other hand, loved this idea, because the only way it could be properly executed was if he had custody of me, a thing he had been seeking so desperately for many years. Years later, I question his motives. Why would he want custody of his son when he was just going to send him off to boarding school? Why would he want kids if he wasn’t going to raise them? But I wanted to go to boarding school, so at the time I didnt care. For the first time, I thought I was finally free.
My freshman year of high school, I attended Stevenson School, a private, co-ed boarding school located in Pebble Beach, Calif. This was an absolute dream. I had finally found a place where I could be myself. I was gay, from Arkansas, and now living in one of the most open-minded states in the nation. By the time Christmas rolled around, I had completely come out of the closet, with minimal resistance from my peers. For the first time in my life, I felt like I had truly found a place that I could call home without the fear or anxiety that my parents caused me.
Spring break arrived, and I traveled back to Arkansas to visit my family. One day my father and stepmother sat me down in the study, a routine they often engaged in when they wanted to catch us children off-guard about a problem that they had with us. This is something that I like to call the sneak attack, where they would gaslight the situation.
My stepmother began. Back at Christmas, your sister found your journal and was shocked by something that you wrote, she told me. We know youre questioning your sexuality, but what do you have to say about that?
I looked from my father to my stepmother and knew my life was about to change. My response: Well, Im gay.
Thats when the frowns began, and I dont think Ive seen my parents genuinely smile at me since. Their questions came at me like bullets: What do you think about the Bible? Dont you want kids? Youre backing yourself into a corner; why dont you wait to decide to be gay when youre 25? I’m far past 25 now and I am most definitely gay.
That summer my father forced me to work as a maintenance man. I had the pleasure of working alongside some of the most ignorant, grotesque men. These middle-aged men would spit homophobic slurs and make sexually suggestive comments about my sisters, and when I used their restroom, I was forced to stare at pictures of naked women that they had posted on the wall. As I endured my own personal hell, I came to the conclusion that my father was somehow trying to butch me up. It was as if he thought that if I spent enough time doing manual labor, listening to crude humor, and keeping away from the arts, the gay would eventually just wash away. It didnt work. What worked was that that I learned patience, perseverance, and the value of staying true to myself. I also learned how to fix a sprinkler system. I chronicled all those days in my LiveJournal that summer. Finally it was time to go back to my boarding school.
My first week back at school, my father and stepmother came to pick me up to send me to rehab for being too gay. I was sitting in biology class when my advisor came to pull me out of class. I asked her if I was in trouble, and she assured me, Of course not. On our way to the admissions building, where her office was located, she casually asked me what Id done over the summer, how my siblings were, and how my parents had been taking my coming out of the closet. I told her that my summer had been hell, that my siblings were grea,t and that my parents werent really handling my coming out very well. As we walked into the admissions building, I could see two men sitting on the couch eyeing me suspiciously (I later found out that they were narcotics officers who had been hired to restrain me and escort me if I tried to escape), as well as my advisors husband and the dean of students. Everyone was just staring at me with the saddest look in their eyes. My advisor then walked me to the door, and I will never forget what she said to me: Im so sorry about whats about to happen. Just know that Tom and I love you. And everyone here at Stevenson does, too. Your parents are here, and theyre taking you away. She then opened the door, and sitting there were my father and stepmother.
My parents told me that theyd hired someone to go through our home computer. Theyd found my LiveJournal, and they were shocked to discover that not only was I gay but I was in fact super-gay. My stepmother looked me in the face and said, You need to butch it up. My father said that theyd also found a profile I had created for myself on a support site for young gay teens. In my biography section, I had said something to the effect of, Since there arent a lot of people in this area, I decided to include myself in the San Francisco area. For this they accused me of soliciting sex online. The wording they used, soliciting sex, made me feel like a prostitute. Additionally, theyd found transcripts of AOL instant messages in which Id discussed with a friend how I would eventually come out of the closet to my younger siblings, who were merely hypothetical at the time. (My stepmother was going through in-vitro fertilization.) Of course, they accused me of wanting to turn my hypothetical siblings gay. I do have younger brothers now, identical twinsbut I’m unaware of what they know about me. I just hope that our parents hate and closed-mindedness didn’t seep into them.
At that point my parents escorted me out of the admissions building, the two narcotics officers holding me by the arms as they led me toward a car. I didnt know why I was being escorted by the two officers; I would later find out that my parents believed that I was on drugs. My peers were watching me as I took the slowest, most humiliating walk of my life. Those two burly men placed me in the car and forced their arms against my shoulders on each side of me so that I was incapable of moving. I felt like a criminal. Then my parents put me on a private plane and sent me to Timberlawn Mental Health System in Dallas, Texas.
As I was admitted into the mental institution, I was visibly upset. Of course I looked crazy, in a Claire-Danes-in- kind of way. I was being put away against my will for being gay, not to mention in a drug and behavioral facility that focused on kids with eating disorders, drug problems, and suicidal tendencies. I didnt belong there. I was stripped of my shoelaces so that I couldnt kill myself with them. I was tested for drugs (it came out negative), given a full-body cavity search (completely clean), and started on a dose of Zoloft that rendered me incapable of feeling any type of emotion. Talk about completely losing every shred of privacy and dignity in a matter of 24 hours. I was a zombie. I was stuck. I was gay and couldnt get out of there.
The kids that I dealt with while in rehab werent the same as me. There was a girl who had tried to cut her fingers off with childs scissors in order to kill herself. There was another girl who had tried to kill herself by wrapping shoelaces around her throat; she was forced to sleep on a mattress on the lobby floor so that the nurses could keep an eye on her at all times. I was the only kid in the unit who was allowed to go to sleep at night with his or her door closed. Several times staff members asked me why I was there, telling me that they thought I seemed pretty level-headed for a teenager. I told them that I was gay and that my parents werent ready to accept it. I was a minor, though, and there was no way of controlling my own destiny when it came to getting out of there. Luckily, I was discharged on my fourth day. I called my parents, thinking that theyd be happy for me and would return me to my boarding school. I was wrong. They were too busy to pick me up, and I was forced to stay there for a full week.
The next facility I was admitted to was Meridell Achievement Center, located outside Austin, Texas. This was a longer-term stay. An alternative program would have been something like Outward Bounds Intercept program, which takes troubled youth on camping adventures in order to teach self-sufficiency and survival skills. I like to describe the differences between these types of programs in MTV terms: Meridell Achievement Center is like The Real World, with youth living in the confines of a safe, structured environment, often fighting (in group therapy in our case), whereas Outward Bounds Intercept program is more like Road Rules, with a group of individuals forced to work together on adventurous outdoor tasks.
I actually enjoyed Meridell Achievement Center, in a Stockholm Syndrome sort of way, because although I was there against my will, the staff assured me that they werent going to try to turn me straight. They asked me what sort of treatment I wanted instead. So I decided that instead of becoming a straight man, I would become more assertive. Over the month and a half that I was at Meridell Achievement Center, we would chronicle our treatment via journaling and a group session called Goals and Feelings. This is where we would sit around in a circle and discuss what our goals and feelings were for the day. This was an extremely cathartic experience. I read the dictionary for fun and worked on my vocabulary.
Eventually my parents began to call and ask me how I was doing in my treatment. They were always vague about why I was there and what I needed to do in order to get out of there. They just kept telling me, You know what you have to do. Work on your treatment. Whatever that meant. After Id been there for a month and a half, they would call and ask, So when do you think youre going to get better? My response was that there wasnt anything wrong with me. Because the facility was so expensive, they once again decided to send me to another facility, for a much longer stay.
I arrived in Sutton, Vt., to attend the King George School upon the first snowfall of the year. If there is a hell, Im convinced that its actually cold and in Vermont. KGS was somewhere between a boarding school and a rehab facility. It was kind of like a prison for shady kids. I was essentially stuck there until I was 18 years old and allowed to discharge myself. Though Im still friends with some of the kids I met there, I was surrounded by misfits. It was horrible. I had a roommate who defecated on the floor, forcing us all to evacuate the dorm for health code reasons. I had another roommate who poked my eye with his penis while I tried to sleep. There was a girl who decided to eat my puzzle pieces so that I wouldnt be able to complete it. These kids were far more troubled than I was as a hormonal gay boy. During my first four months there I didnt receive any kind of psychiatric treatment whatsoever, and then the appointed psychiatrist declared me completely stable and normal. He even told me that I never deserved to be there in the first place. But how to get out?
I remember during Christmas, my parents and my sister came to visit me. They took me off campus to stay at the Wildflower Inn just outside of town. We were having dinner one night and all having a glass of Chardonnay, which only furthers my point of the absurdity of me being in rehab in the first place. The candlelight was dancing across our red faces when my stepmom blurted out that I was an accident, meaning I wasn’t a planned pregnancy between my father and mother. When I asked my father if this were true and if I were a last ditch-effort to save his marriage with my mother, he solemnly answered, Yes.
Finally, after 279 days of rehab, I was released back into the wild. As it turned out, the person who convinced my parents to let me return to Stevenson School was the very woman who had helped my stepmother through her first divorce back in the 1990s. That must have been one hell of a mental breakdown, because that was my ticket back to the place that I loved, the place that had accepted me unconditionally, the place that had made me the strong-willed, no-holds-barred, wonderful gay man that I am today.
As for my relationship with my parents today, Ill tell you this. I called my father the other day and left him a voicemail. I had left him a voicemail every day all summer long, begging for help financially because I don’t know when I’m going to eat next or let alone be able to pay my bills or rent. He hadn’t answered or returned a single phone call. I finally called and asked him if he wanted to have a relationship with me at all. He called me back and began to list all the ways that I had manipulated him over the summer in trying to receive help. Mind you, I suffer from and seek help for major depression and PTSD from childhood and adolescent abuse caused by this man. I am also a recovered alcoholic and have a little over two years of sobriety. By no means am I trying to manipulate the situation, but he instead gaslights the situation and backs me into a corner to make me feel that I had. I let him know that I felt the same about him with this situation on the phone. He did say he wanted to have a relationship with me in the end, but based on his actions and words, he doesn’t. He has five children and he could care less about any of them. Why have kids if you aren’t going to be a father?
In terms of my recovery, I drank a lot because of my memories of my childhood and the experiences I had while in rehab. I have explored in trauma therapy one in particular that had me at the bar almost every night staring into the mirror ahead of me sipping on whiskey, replaying the events from childhood. At the age of three, in his truck, propped up against the steering wheel, the pleas to, Come on, and Quick. That’s the man who sent me to rehab for being too gay. He’s a hypocrite. He sickens me. He’s a monster. And I might as well be done with him for good.
I never got the chance to come out of the closet on my own terms, so I would like to take this opportunity to let everyone know, Looks like I relapsed, because Im still gay.
More From this publisher : HERE
=> *********************************************** Original Post Here: How I Got Sent To Rehab For Being Too Gay ************************************ =>
How I Got Sent To Rehab For Being Too Gay was originally posted by A 18 MOA Top News from around
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njawaidofficial · 7 years
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Leah Remini Doubles Down on Anti-Scientology Crusade: I Want a Federal Investigation
http://styleveryday.com/2017/08/09/leah-remini-doubles-down-on-anti-scientology-crusade-i-want-a-federal-investigation/
Leah Remini Doubles Down on Anti-Scientology Crusade: I Want a Federal Investigation
The firebrand star revs up her war in season two of A&E’s Emmy-nominated docuseries ‘Aftermath’ as she heads to New York to join Kevin James’ CBS comedy amid a church counteroffensive: “It’s been really trying.”
Some moments from Leah Remini’s childhood will never fade. Like the afternoon she rode a graffiti-covered B Train with her big sister, Nicole — at ages 8 and 10, their first time alone on New York City mass transit. Their journey took them from Bensonhurst, Brooklyn, to Times Square — a seedy porn-theater mecca in the late ’70s — and the Church of Scientology building on 46th Street. There, they met their mother, Vicki, a divorcee whose new boyfriend had indoctrinated the family in the self-fulfillment movement. “We went all-in, because Scientology is an all-in proposition,” says Remini. “My mother thought she’d found the answers to her life and, you know, our future.”
Three decades later, Remini is going home again. The 47-year-old actress and anti-Scientology activist is currently relocating from Los Angeles, her home since age 13, back to the East Coast. The move is a practical one: She’s joining the cast of Kevin Can Wait, part of a major second-season retooling of the CBS sitcom that sees the departure of its current female lead, Erinn Hayes. Beginning Aug. 7, Remini will be seated in a Long Island soundstage alongside Kevin James, her TV husband for nine years on The King of Queens, for the season’s first table reads. But right now, she’s just trying to cram her life into cardboard boxes. “It’s been really trying,” she offers wearily on July 28. “I’ve never been apart from my daughter for longer than five days.” Sofia, 13, has opted to remain in her current school and will travel to see her mother on weekends with her father, Remini’s husband of 14 years, singer-actor Angelo Pagan.
Remini also will continue to produce and star in Leah Remini: Scientology and the Aftermath — the second season premieres Aug. 15. This enthralling A&E documentary series profiles ex- Scientologists like herself — people shunned and targeted by the church and, all too often, by their own family members. The two vastly different shows will air concurrently (“hopefully not on the same day,” says Remini). Aftermath has earned Remini, who stars and executive produces the show, an Emmy nomination for best informational series or special. It’s her first shot at an Emmy and, after nearly 30 years in the business, that feels good — even if it’s not quite as she had always imagined it. “When I was just acting, of course it was something you always wanted,” she says. “Like, hey, we’re on a show for nine years, you want some recognition from your peers.” Now she’s more interested to win it for her Aftermath subjects. “They don’t get paid to do the show. The only thing they get is a hate website put out on them by Scientology. They get paid internet ads against them. Their families turn against them. Any award I get is for them.”
But not long ago, before the nomination and new show, Remini had doubts that Hollywood would ever embrace her again. Her profile had waned in the post-King of Queens years, during which she appeared in a string of failed sitcoms with names like Family Tools. In 2010, she began a stint on CBS’ The Talk that culminated in her firing the next year — followed by a very public war of words with her Talk co-star Sharon Osbourne.
But her flight from Scientology in 2013 dramatically altered the course of her career — and, it turns out, revitalized it. Doubts about the organization and its strong-arm tactics had begun to creep in as early as 2004, but it was at Tom Cruise’s storybook wedding to Katie Holmes in 2006 that Remini began to seriously contemplate cutting and running. At the ceremony, set at a 15th century Italian castle, she’d innocently asked about the whereabouts of church leader David Miscavige’s absent wife, Shelly. That was apparently a big no-no, and she says church elders cursed at her and told her to mind her place. Drawn to keep asking questions, Remini soon saw her life become hell, as former friends and colleagues subjected her to blacklisting and the filing of dozens of “internal reports.”
Remini filed a missing persons report on Shelly Miscavige, whose whereabouts are still in question. A Los Angeles Police Department detective later told Remini, “She is fine,” which Remini considered an unsatisfying response. “I asked, ‘Did you see her? Did you see her body? Was somebody speaking on her behalf?’ ” (She recalls the detective replied, “Can’t tell you that, ma’am.”) Remini says the detective in question has since been hired to speak at Scientology events. “Does he work for the Church of Scientology, or is he LAPD?” she asks aloud. “Like, what’s going on here? They host detective lunches at the Celebrity Centre for the LAPD Hollywood division. I mean, they’re very, very friendly with each other.”
Remini chronicled her flight from Scientology in 2015’s book Troublemaker: Surviving Hollywood and Scientology — a by-turns dishy and disturbing tell-all that includes, amid the dirty laundry, a story about Cruise berating an assistant over faultily prepared cookie dough. The book was promoted heavily in the run-up to its release with a 20/20 interview and dozens of talk show appearances, and it shot to No. 1 on The New York Times best-seller list.
With the book’s success, several ex-Scientologists reached out to Remini in gratitude and to share their own trials with the church. She brought cameras with her (and a high-ranking church defector, Mike Rinder) to document one shocking story: a woman’s deathbed account of her forced estrangement from her daughter, under church orders. Against the protestations of her management team, Remini brought that footage to producers Eli Holzman and Aaron Saidman and proposed turning such narratives into a series. “I said, ‘Don’t be pussies. If you’re going to be pussies, you’re not the right producers for this,’ ” Remini recounted at a TV Academy event this past May. After a tense huddle, the two men assured her they weren’t “pussies” — and the series was born.
Remini is astonished at the impact of Aftermath‘s first season — which focused on disconnection. “We’ve heard from people who were inside Scientology, who told me, ‘I watched your show. I went on the internet. I decided to leave. I am fighting for my children after watching your show,’ ” says Remini. “We get tons of those. And it’s those moments that you go, ‘OK — we’re doing something.’ “
Season two will ramp up the attacks on the religion, shining a light on what Remini calls “all of the abusive practices of Scientology — sexual abuse and physical abuse.” Remini intends for the sophomore outing to move into an “activist” realm — meaning she hopes to present enough evidence of criminal wrongdoing to warrant a federal investigation. “I’m talking about the FBI, the police, the Department of Justice, the IRS,” she says. “If the FBI ever wanted to get anywhere, all they would need to do is do a raid. Everybody who’s ever gone to Scientology has folders, and anything you’ve ever said is contained in those folders.”
Asked to explain these “abusive practices,” Remini takes a deep breath, then lays out some foundational principles. “Scientology policy dictates that children are grown men and women in little bodies. They believe a 7-year-old girl should not shudder at being passionately kissed. That’s in Dianetics,” she says, referencing L. Ron Hubbard’s 1950 book that establishes core tenets. “If you join the Sea Org [a clergy class with a nautical heritage] as a child, your parents give you over to Scientology. Children are treated as crew. They are assets. And if a child is molested, that child and/or parent cannot go to the police, because it’s against policy. They handle it in Scientology. They will usually bring the molester in and give them spiritual ‘auditing,’ or counseling.” The victim, she continues, “gets punished for ‘pulling it in,’ which is a Scientology term that means you did something that you’re not telling the church about — and that’s why you received the abuse. The child is usually made to do some kind of amends, to make up for what happened to them.”
Remini (who says she once was falsely accused of being “Out 2D” — Scientology’s term for having premarital sex — after church officials found lace panties in her drawer) argues that “there are no victims in Scientology. Anything that happens to you in Scientology happens to you because you made it happen.”
The church has a different take on Remini and her A&E series, citing a spike in anti-Scientology hate crimes, bomb threats and death threats since Aftermath began airing. That escalation has required “drastic increases in security in many of our churches,” says Scientology spokeswoman Karin Pouw, who adds that since the show first aired, “there have been more than 500 incidents of vandalism, harassment and threats of violence against the church, its parishioners, staff and leadership.” Pouw cites several recent incidents, including “a woman who gushed about Leah Remini on social media [then] drove her car through the front doors and lobby of our church in Austin, Texas, coming to rest just short of a nursery where earlier children [had been] playing,” and a man who “served five months in jail and is now on parole for a credible assassination threat against the leader of the church, which he said was inspired by the ‘King of Queens lady.’ “
Adds Pouw: “Leah Remini is just an actress whose current role is starring in a scam of a show whose singular goal is to incite religious hate and violence for ratings, money and Emmy nominations.”
With both sides ramping up for a new — and, in all likelihood, much uglier — phase of this all-out war, Remini says the fight has been “rewarding, but very taxing.”
Amid such stress, working with James again takes some of the edge off. “I’m just happy to be laughing again,” she says.
The two reunited in May for a two-part Kevin Can Wait season finale in which they played rival detectives forced to team up to investigate a drug-smuggling case. After the show notched a surprise win in the ratings, it was apparent to everyone involved that the chemistry was still there. “They have a natural ESP. It’s magic,” says showrunner Rob Long, who worked with Remini on a 1993 episode of Cheers. (Long was a writer on the show; Remini played the daughter of Rhea Perlman’s Carla.)
When NBC passed on Remini’s comedy pilot (based on the 1991 Bill Murray comedy What About Bob?) in May, Kevin Can Wait producers saw a window of opportunity. Says Long, “It was a very small group of us that thought it would be fun to bring her back as a series regular. We were looking for a creative reset — a way to create a little bit more emotion.” Season two will see the action move ahead in time and Hayes’ wife killed off, leaving open the possibility of romance between James’ and Remini’s characters.
Still, Remini, who claims that she has no idea what her arc on the show will be, says she was pleasantly clueless about the opportunity. “My agent just said, ‘You’re going to be on the show.’ I said, ‘How many episodes?’ He said, ‘No — you’re going to be on the season.’ I was like, ‘Oh, my God — that’s amazing!’ That was the first round of excitement. And then, of course, reality sets in, where you’re like, ‘Oh, wait — I have to move my whole life there.’ “
Yet Remini isn’t complaining. “When I was younger, I was like, ‘What’s the character’s name? And I need to speak to the stylist on the show. And I need to have certain shoes and, like, what’s my dressing room look like?’ ” she says. “Now I’m like, ‘Great. Where do I sign?’ “
Remini will have shot three episodes when, in September, it’s back to L.A. for the Emmys, where her status as Scientology Public Enemy No. 1 could make things a little awkward for her. What if, for example, she were to cross paths with Elisabeth Moss, a nominee for outstanding lead actress in a drama series for The Handmaid’s Tale — and a lifelong member of the church?
“Elisabeth Moss believes that she can’t talk to me,” says Remini. “There’s a thing in Scientology called ‘acceptable truth.’ It means you only say what’s acceptable to the public. But she believes that I’m an antisocial personality — because I’ve spoken out against Scientology. So she isn’t allowed to talk to me. And me knowing that, I wouldn’t put her in the awkward position.”
But what if, say, the two were to suddenly come face-to-face at the Governors Ball, each carrying a freshly engraved Emmy? Would she congratulate her fellow winner? “I would, of course,” says Remini. “I don’t hold anything against Elisabeth Moss other than she’s continuing to support a group that is abusive and destroying families.”
But, Remini adds, “That’s for her to learn — just as I needed to learn it.”
This story first appeared in the Aug. 9 issue of The Hollywood Reporter magazine. To receive the magazine, click here to subscribe.
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