#hadn't even noticed lol
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I'm at that part of chapter three my friends, so let me be a reminder that Colm O'Driscoll's plan to lure in Dutch after taking Arthur failed because nobody came looking for him.
He would have died being held captive any longer, he barely escaped.
The gang did not come for Arthur.
#and it makes me seethe#listen in my first playthrough this was the part I thought Arthur was going to die in#that's how little I knew about this game#I was crying real tears#I was mourning arthur three chapters early lol#and I know I know micah explains himself but god it is not good enough#tilly went missing and they noticed right away#they hadn't seen trelawny in a few days and they went to find him#FUCKING BILL GOES MISSING AFTER BEING TAKEN BY BOUNTY HUNTERS AND THEY NOTICE#I seethe I seethe#Arthur Morgan your own family failed you#I get so caught up in the fun family dynamic that I have to remember that arthur is the “protector”#so who protects the protector? well then this mission tells you everything you need to know#arthur has to save himself because nobody was there for him#and again I know that if the gang knew he was taken they would look#but the fact that hosea said LOUD AND CLEAR that it was a trap and that THEY HAD SAID TO MEET UP IF ANYTHING WENT WRONG#AND THEY STILL DIDN'T LOOK FOR HIM!!!!!!!!#THEY DIDN'T EVEN TRY#ARTHUR WENT MISSING FROM A MISSION THAT WAS CLEARLY A TRAP AND THEY DIDN'T GO LOOKING FOR HIM#FOR THEIR SON#THEIR BROTHER#THEY DIDN'T LOOK!!!!#my blood is boiling#rdr2#red dead redemption 2#mick squeaks#arthur morgan#red dead redemption 2 spoilers#mick rants#colm o'driscoll
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Warrior Nun - 1x07 || 2x02 - requested by anonymous
#warriornunedit#warrior nun#ava silva#sister beatrice#alba baptista#kristina tonteri young#warrior nun spoilers#warrior nun 1x07#warrior nun 2x02#avatrice#femslash related stuff#requested by anon#sent on 20221111#anon if you thought I didn't immediately notice this!#and this time doing it deliberately!#but I probably wouldn't have done this until much later if you hadn't requested it#what happens when the halo didn't choose you but the halo bearer did#other people still casualties lol but bea will be safe always#and then bea's mad at her for exposing them but she did it to save her and she can't even share why she'd always save bea
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Me @ the Luffy tab
#@ all the people whining and complaining about it#sucks to be u i guess#meanwhile i'm having the time of my life#monkey d. luffy#one piece#opla#luffy#like it's such an easy thing to ignore#i've managed to ignore the 'for you' and 'your tags' options this entire time#it's not hard#and when it gets changed to something else i'll simply ignore that too#i honestly wouldn't have even noticed it if people hadn't been pointing it out#lol
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“I didn’t.....die. Now that’s weird.”
Idk exactly where Grian is going with this whole thing but I do know I love the vibe of it already
[Twitter • Instagram]
#see I opened this document intending to draw his floating nether portal#because I just love how that looks so much#then after about two minutes of scribbling out a shape#i realized the shape i was drawing was the crack in the cave#and I hadn't even noticed what I was drawing lol#Lee speaks#hermitcraft#hermitcraft 9#grian#hermitcraft art#i feel like i haven't drawn in soooo long. this was nice to do#looking at this as I type the post I'm actually pretty happy with how it looks wow#there was a point about halfway through drawing it#that I was like ehhhh it's doesn't look great and idk if I can fix that#but tbh I think i did fix it lol#i'm posting this at like midnight my time#so if it completely flops on notes#don't be surprised if you see me delete this and repost it tomorrow lol
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TUMBLR KEEPS MAKING ME UNFOLLOW U FOR SOME REASON SORRYYYY
they try to turn us against each other but NOTHING can keep two mentally ill girlmutuals (gender-neutral) apart. #win
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Thinking about how Claudia felt like Louis and Lestat made her to be his sister, a sort of replacement for Grace.
And in a way, Louis chose being with Lestat over maintaining his relationship with his sister.
And ultimately he chose Lestat over Claudia too, repeatedly.
#grace de pointe du lac#louis de pointe du lac#claudia de pointe du lac#iwtv#when I say he bailed on grace#I don't mean the turning which was a muddy situation#but the way he progressively abandoned ship during the first few years of his living with Lestat#rewatching the episodes I was harder than I should've been on grace#I forgot he'd never even met the twins and by 1917 he had to make an effort to remember she even had any lol#of course him only being able to come at night would've been more noticeable if he'd visited more#but like grace's actress said on the podcast he never even apologized#in the confession scene he says he lost ‟his mother and his sister‟#but he hadn't lost her at all#idk if he meant ‟to levi‟? ie in reference to the fact that during the funeral his mom#kind of acted like she was willing to ‟replace‟ him with levi#after all Levi made money too#even if not as much as Louis#so if money's the only reason the mom bothered with Louis or if he felt that was the case#I can see how he'd feel like even the narrow place he got to occupy by his family's side was being taken away#especially that Levi was neither gay not being the scapegoat for Paul's death#but grace wasn't involved in that beyond marrying the man she loved#and though she definitely could've stood up for him better when his mom blamed him for Paul or at the funeral#she was also grieving and to be fair it doesn't seem like their dynamic was ever one in which he could rely on her#so I wonder why he immediately felt he'd lost her. but yeah#my posts
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#Looking at my childhood art like i was a TERRIBLE artist even by child standards#No wonder my dad was so angry when i decided to try to make art work rather than get a comfy software engineering job#Like child me was DETERMINED to do this i thought it was a given there was no way i wasnt going to be an artist#Pretty much from the age of 4 when i saw beauty and the beast for the first time#But looking back at it as an adult like...i get it#I can see why my dad watched me draw these shitty weird cartoons as a kid and worried that i was going to fail miserably lol#He was partially right :/#My art is still shit but i keep at it like...like one of those whack a moles#Or the punching bag thing that gets hit and flips right back up#Did i mention i saw my dad briefly on my way up here#He's so disappointed in me i can just see it in how he talks to me or looks at me#But for fucks sake even when i was doing EVERYTHING right and getting my computer science degree and graduating with straight A's#He STill didnt want anything to do with me so its not much of a fucking change#I did notice he asked if i had heard from jordan#And no i dont keep tabs with my brother much#But i was shocked that dad hadn't heard from him in years because last time i saw my dad 2018 ish jordan was the golden child#He was the one who was finally steering his life in the right direction and studying programming#(not at my level but he's a boy so its fine)#And getting a programming job and shit#I guess that golden child status didnt last long kind of like my own lmao#Journal shit#Anyway tldr im feeling real shitty about my art right now \o/
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One of the most loving couples out there is the one with the girl being 50 years older than the guy.
They're very much in love but also very gullible & stupid and end up breaking up(?) each episode cause three losers want to eat their tears and wish to be superheroes
They have the blue/red couple thing going on and are also an endangered species
And their names are ancient
#as a kid i hadn't realized how old they were#but i watched the movie recently and noticed the fact that Pandora is 430 and Platonas 380 and they've been in love for 300 years#like... how do you even come up with these ages#also how the fuck are they an endangered species if theyre immortal#idk why i wanted to make this post but take it#i wanted to talk about their bizarre ages lol#also can we talk about the fact that the movie was basically the characters να ταπονουν ο ενας τον αλλον?#και να βρίζονται#like if the villain called an alien vlammeno nowadays it would have been canceled i think#Πανδώρα και Πλάτωνας#τα φραουλοπουλα#sugarenia talks
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//I’ve missed my high-strung son and his historically inaccurate side bangsTM.
#OutOfCamp#through a glass darkly#//clearly my writing/inspiration issue was i hadn't watched turn in like...months#i weep i cry i hrrrgh#anyway yeah i work today but i only have one draft so#hopefully i'm good to go again?? we shall see#not that anyone noticed since i pressed on#even through the lack of inspo since i have no self-control lol#my stoofs
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cut my own hair for the first time ever
#I'm such a scaredy-cat about my own hair#it's literally waist length and wavy like the most forgivable style possible#literally no one will notice I took like less than two inches off#but I'm worried it's not even in the back lol#on the other hand...the sense of absolute power...I understand why everyone did this as a kid#(my sister did it for me before I got the chance and it was a whole thing)#(I didn't look good with a pixie cut as a three-four year old and I doubt I would now)#but anyway I hadn't gotten it trimmed in like at least 9 months bc I forgot to have my mom do it over christmas#so the situation was getting pretty desperate
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I hadn't taken my adhd meds for a few days and yesterday I accidentally ran a red light. I was stopped by the police and had my driver's license, car plates and vehicle registration taken away and i also have to pay a 700€ fine.
Moral of the story? Always take your meds
#it was like 2 am and i was basically alone on the road#and no i hadn't drank#i didn't even notice what i did#the police asked me and i couldn't answer them#i was so confused#and shocked#the car isn't even mine#it's my parents#my own car is safe and sound in cyprus lol#the cop was really sarcastic and mean to me btw#now my hate for cops is also personal#like i get that i made a mistake but you could at least act professional#adhd#attention deficit hyperactivity disorder#adhd meds#btw i hadn't taken my meds bc it's easter break and i didn't have uni etc#big mistake#strattera#text#my rambles
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today was orientation for my grad program, and then there was a party at a professor's house this evening for all the slp students (1st and 2nd years) and it all went pretty well tbh!! i was worried it would be overwhelming and i'd stand in a corner on my phone talking to no one like i usually do in social gatherings but i actually managed to talk to people and they were mostly pretty cool!
#i am crediting this on two things: me being older than a lot of the (sometimes visibly nervous) other students#and also i think me being visibly transmasc in a very female-dominated environment made me stand out (in a good way)#some people recognized me from zoom class and were like 'yoo joyce what's up' even tho we hadn't really talked in zoom class before#so that was nice#i also think now that i'm dressing in men's clothing and actually liking my appearance that probably didn't hurt with the confidence either#anyway i think i'm sticking out but i like it lol i think it's gonna get me friends and also make me more noticeable for professors#bc i need connections with professors if i want a ga-ship#also there is one clinical supervisor who does gender-affirming voice therapy and i'm big👀#hello yes i would like to work with you pls#here is that grad school tag#OH also one of the second years invited me to a new dnd group this sunday so that's exciting too#we'll see if it goes anywhere but they seem cool
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🐭 You're just so cool ;-; ♥
Awwwwwwwaawwaww??? Naff????
You're the cool one!!!! *shaking you* <3 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And like I told the other anon, I'm just a shy ball of anxiety ocassionally posting my art shjshsjshshs no reason to be intimidated!
#love that I got to your ask when a SJ song came on lol#shjshsjsvsbsvsvs#*shakes you more*#<3#beloved mutuals <3#ask cero#naffeclipse#oh! I hadn't even noticed!#you didn't send it on anon like usually!#good for you! hsjsgsjsb
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Holy smokes XD
#the only flirt options I've ever noticed in this entire game are with valdez and rahmani#and allegedly there was supposed to be one for Shin if I hadn't pissed him off buuuut. let's not even go there#but I sort of wonder what the point of the flirt options even is if you can't actually romance these characters#I both really want to see what valdez would say to this and don't want to put poor Trin through the hell of having to say it lol#I've done all the bos quests so I doubt it would damage anything#but poor Trin XD#chaos plays fallout 76
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it's been said before and i'm sure said better than i can phrase it. but really, really - if you like making "i'm going to kill myself" jokes, please try switching to being ironically conceited instead.
anytime something goes wrong, say things like "ah well at least i'm beautiful and charming and everyone loves me." when you forget something, try "my big huge brain is so smart and thinking about too many other very big wizardly thoughts you wouldn't even understand." when you're frustrated by one of your symptoms, start talking like you're in My Immortal. "Life has come for me but my eyes are beautiful pools of gorgeous fire and my hair is amazing. I stuck my middle finger up at life and told it to fuck off and it did."
just... try it for a month or two. try saying the most absurdly self-congratulatory shit you can think of.
i know it's tempting to make suicide or self-harm jokes. and for me at least, a decade ago (!) when someone suggested i stop making those kinds of jokes, i was kind of at a loss for what to replace them with. i wanted to make light of these moments, but genuinely (at the time) my first thought really was suicidal ideation. there was a part of me that even felt like ... i was kind of "making light" of that voice. that if i could say i want to die lol, it would help take the sting out of that genuine (albeit passive) desire. like i could turn my illness into a joke.
when i started complimenting myself instead, it felt awkward and stupid. it felt really, really ironic. what i was actually saying was nobody would ever think this stuff about me, that's what makes it so fucking funny.
but. the effect was immediate. first thing i noticed was the people around me. when i dropped a glass and said ah my skin is too beautiful and sleek the glass has swooned and broken for me, other people were suddenly overjoyed to jump in with the joke. rather than making an awkward moment, we'd both start cracking up. ah princess sleek hands, i've heard of you.
i was 19. i hadn't noticed i'd been making others tense when i said i want it all to end. i know now that it's incredibly hard to know how to walk that moment - do you talk to them about your concern? do you potentially make them uncomfortable by asking if they're okay? do you ignore the situation? do you help them pick up the glass, or do they need to do it by themselves? are they genuinely made suicidal over this small moment? and most importantly, how do you - without professional training or supplies - actually help?
most people want to help you pick up the glass in your life, they just have no fucking idea how to do it. they don't want to make anything worse. they don't want to make assumptions about you. they love you, they're scared for you - and being scared makes people kind of freeze up. it's not because they don't love you. it's because they do.
now when something bad happens, my first thought is how can i make a stupid joke about this. it isn't my brain saying you're a dumb fucking bitch. i spend more time laughing. i spend more time being gentle with myself. i spend more time feeling good.
and the thing is - what's kind of funny - is that you'd be surprised by how many people agree with you. the first time i said i'm too pretty to understand that, someone else said to be fair you're the prettiest person in this room. i promise - you really don't know how kindly your friends see you. but they love you for a reason. they sort of reverse-velveteen-rabbit you. your weird and ugly spots fade away and you just become... the love they want to give you.
go love yourself ironically. the worst thing that happens is that you end up tricking your reflection into actually loving you.
#something something toxic relationships notwithstanding#(re: the friends stuff)#most people love you. automatically. for being alive. like people are just MADE that way.#and the reason kms jokes don't always land is bc people fucking love you and are like - ahhh how do i help#let them help you!!!!!!
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hahahahahaha i am so screwed hahahahahahaha
#got an email today to send in our information for the big scholarship i got last year and guess who doesn't meet the GPA requirement!!!!!!!!#i litrally don't know what to do#i literally can't even text my friend who also got the scholarship because her grades and gpa are wonderful and mine are shit and it will#make me feel like the most stupid person in the world!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#anyway. i am going to email the lady tomorrow and be like 'hey heres the situation pls tell me if theres anything i can do'#because i was genuinely depending on this scholarship to help me pay rent and stuff but lol#im kinda hoping that they'll take pity on me since i'm retaking the class that i failed that plummeted my gpa and once i transfer the credit#it will boost my gpa and just be like 'yeah no worries we'll send the money once you meet the requirement'#that OR they'll be like 'due to ur special circumstances of being an orphan we are taking pity on you and will work with you'#OR EVEN 'yeah whatever we'll send the money this time but if it happens again you're getting it taken away'#i genuinelly don't know what i'll do if i get it taken away#like yeah i'll have my school paid for but literally only because i took out loans#not to mention that i will have to tell everyone that i lost the scholarship and even if i don't tell them they will find out because they#do a banquet every single year to celebrate new and past recievers and everyone will notice i am not there#and i will be the biggest failure in the entire world who couldn't even meet a very simple fucking gpa requirement!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#anyway. forcing myself to not panic and feel despair yet#i am actually going to text one of my other friends who is not involved in this whatsoever and get her advice#its fine it will be fine it will all work out i am not going to lose the scholarship they literally told me even if my mom hadn't died my#senior year that they still would have given me the scholarship it is FINE i will be FINE#lacey talks
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