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0606-hyuck · 3 years

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a letter to my lover | lee donghyuck

♡ dear y/n, i’m writing you this letter in the hopes that it gets to you well. our relationship has been tumultuous, that’s for sure, and i thought it was high time i wrote you a letter detailing all the times you said "i love you" that are important to me.

genre: haechan x reader, heavy angst, supernatural!haechan, deity!haechan

warnings: suggestive content, mentions of religion, profanity

word count: 2.1K

tagging: the lovely @roses-of-the-moon ♡ @mora134340 // @nct-writers

Dear Y/N,

The first time you said “I love you”, you were worshipping me.

The temple lay just east of the large town you resided in, about an hour's drive from the coast. People from your area traditionally followed a polytheisic religion and worshipped the gods and goddesses of life, death, earth, air, fire, water, time, the sun, and the moon. Temples dedicated to the gods and goddesses were scattered around the peninsula, although some temples saw a lot more visitors than others. This Sun temple was larger and older than typical Sun temples, and the red, yellow, and orange colour scheme from the outside flowed nicely into the high, spacious interior. There were pews dotted around the room for people to sit on, but the temple was empty given the late time of night, save for you.

You stood in front of a ten-foot tall bronze statue of myself, or what you mortals assumed my true form looked like, crumpled on your knees and head bent in reverence. It was unusual for me to see followers at my temple so late at night, but I really couldn’t blame you if you had come to simply stare at my statue - turns out bronze really is my colour. As I realised you were muttering something softly, I remember creeping closer towards you and sitting on one of the pews close by. Not so close that you noticed my presence, but near enough that I could hear what you were saying. “I love you, but…”. You uttered my name - once, twice, three times - followed by a number of curse words strung together in an order that I had never been witness to before.

Using my powers, I lit the lamp on the wall beside us to indicate I had heard you, and you proceeded to tell me a story of how your uncle’s farm was failing due to a perpetual drought that hung over the area and wouldn’t leave. Upon hearing your admission, I was astounded. I was one of few Sun deities, who essentially reported directly to the presiding Sun God. If there was a drought that I wasn’t aware of, then I wasn’t doing my job properly, and that was an issue.

Ever since you had visited my temple that one evening and let forth a tidal wave of insults and curses towards me, rather than admiring my bronze look-alike, I was intrigued by you. I hadn’t revealed myself to you that night - not quite yet - but there was something about you that fascinated me. Whether that was your stubbornness or your determination to fix your uncle’s farm, I don’t know, but I wanted to find out more. Showing myself to you right now was out of the question - there’s no way you would believe I was the famous Haechan, Sun deity that everyone worshipped - I had to earn your trust. So I started with the largest issue first; resolving this drought issue that was ruining your uncle’s farm. It really was a complex problem with a simple solution - a little gold flashed a friendly Water deity’s way and voila! No more drought.

The second time you said “I love you”, we had just finished making love on a public beach.

I had solved your drought calamity, but still found myself drawn to you. So I did what I do best - using the sun to my advantage. At first, I would simply manipulate the light from the sun so that you walked in the shade on hot days. When you were cold, I made sure there was always a warm burst of energy by your side. I remember the day I finally found the courage to present myself to you. Not my true form, of course, that would be firmly against deity rules, but I found a human male who suited me perfectly. He was young, around the same age you were, and had fiery orange hair and bronze, sunkissed skin that reminded me of my statue. Fitting, really.

The day we finally spoke it was hot, the Sun God had had a disagreement with the Life Goddess and appeared to be tormenting her creations. I was sitting on a bench, secluded under a willowy tree, and it was fairly straight forward for me to direct some of the sun’s rays directly onto your uncovered head, sending you fleeing into the shade of the tree. I made conversation with you, charming as I am, and I instantly knew you were taken with me.

As the months progressed, we spent more and more time together. Your uncle’s farm recovered, and he was able to regrow a lot more crops in the dampened soil. We spent all our free time together - after helping out at your mother’s shop you would come visit me at my temple, and we would share the rest of the evening together. The more I got to know you, the more mortal you made me feel. We celebrated your village and religious holidays together. We went shopping at the markets together. We even developed a favourite pastime, travelling to the beach and spending the day in the cool ocean, and I was always there to warm us up as we lay on the sand, hand in hand.

I’d never entertained the idea that I may one day feel so at home with a human by my side, but this was quickly becoming the future I envisioned, and even yearned for, for myself. That day at the beach, when we were all alone, and you told me you loved me for the second time, I knew I felt the same way. There was just something about you, Y/N, that kept me drawn to you. I was almost ready to tell you what I was, a sun deity - but little did we know that would be the beginning of the end for us.

The third time you said “I love you”, I told you I didn’t love you back.

A lie, really.

In the past, I had told you my name was Haechan, but after you laughed and said there was no way I was named after the Sun deity, you started calling my vessel Donghyuck. At first I hated it. It was strange being referred to as anything other than Haechan. Soon though, I realised how freeing it was having another name, another identity. Haechan became what the other gods, goddesses, and deities referred to me as when I was in their presence, in my true form, but Donghyuck was what you called me when I was with you. And I liked that.

A few weeks after our latest beach date, you asked me to become your boyfriend, and I accepted. You were over the moon, but I felt strange because we were now in a serious relationship while my whole identity was a lie.

The day I sat you down and told you who I was, who I really was, I was worried. I certainly wasn’t terrified, by any means, but I was anxious that you would simply laugh me off again and not take me seriously. I loved you so much, and I didn’t want to live a life of deceit. To your credit, you handled the news pretty well, at least at first. You said the more you thought about it, the more aspects of me made sense. The ever-hot skin. The shadows that protected us from the sun. The fact it was never truly dark when I was around. It made sense, and you accepted it. And then you started asking me the hard questions. How long would I live for? Was I immortal? Would you die before I did?

Would I give up my immortality for you? When I bluntly refused, the arguments started. Me being a deity hadn’t caused us problems before, but now you knew the truth it meant we couldn’t even have a normal conversation without the topic being brought up. Sure, I had been a Sun deity for centuries, but I couldn’t just give up this role I had been blessed with. You also weren’t willing to give in, either, saying I had virtually assimilated into human culture and should therefore be the one to change. After one particularly heated night of arguing, you said you loved me. I told you I didn’t love you back, and I still remember the way tears silently pooled in your eyes as you stared at me, begging me to say it wasn’t true. Which it wasn’t, of course it wasn’t Y/N, but the truth was at the time I didn’t think I loved you enough to give up my life.

The last time you said “I love you”, we were breaking up.

“I love you, but we can’t be together,” are the exact words you said. We were in my temple, sitting on the pew right in front of the statue where we’d first met, and we were breaking up. You were unwilling to give your life up for me, and I was unwilling to give my life up for you. I loved you so much, but it seemed like the only option. Your stubbornness and determination, which first attracted me to you, was now causing me so much heartache I thought my chest was going to rip in half. You only made things worse by the way you held me that evening, your hands in mine, and then your hands wrapping around my neck and pulling me close so you could place a soft kiss on my tear-stained cheek. That was the last time we talked to each other.

You stayed around in your town for a few months after our break up. I know, because I was always with you. Not physically, but my presence was always there. On the hot summer days with the sun beating down on you and your friends, in the extra stretch of shade that seemed perfectly shaped to fit you, in the bursts of hot air when the nights were particularly cold, I was there. And I know you knew I was too; the sad, regretful smile that graced your face said so much more than words ever could.

After we broke up, I heard of a phrase you mortals are particularly keen on: “absence makes the heart grow fonder.” Sure, and absence also makes the heart realise how fucking stupid it was to break yours.

I don’t know why you left town. Maybe it was to get a job in a bigger city, or to travel the country. Or maybe it was to get away from the constant reminder of us. Either way, you left without a word, and because I am essentially bound to my temple and the surrounding area, I couldn’t follow you. I still think about you daily, Y/N. I wonder where you are, what you’re doing, whether you would give me another chance. Your uncle’s farm is doing well, by the way. I make sure I check in every couple of weeks to make sure the ground is not too dry, and the plants are getting enough sunlight. The beach we used to visit is still as beautiful as ever. It’s a little more lonely without you by my side, though.

I miss you heaps, Y/N. That’s why I’m writing you this letter. I don’t know where you live now, so I doubt I’ll ever be able to send it to you. I never realised how monotonous my existence was until you left. I am worshipped by so many mortals, but they only come to me when they require something. And they never pray to me, at least not the real me I discovered when I was with you. You, however, came to me because you liked me - dare I say, because you loved me - and you saw me for my personality, not for what I could offer you. I constantly think about that day, the last time you said you loved me. I would do anything to go back and change the outcome, to go back and tell you that I would become mortal for you.

It’s been a few years since then, and I don’t even know whether you would want me back. We all make mistakes, Y/N, but by far my biggest mistake was losing you. I hope that, wherever you are, whatever you’re doing, you’re happy, and you think of me sometimes.

Forever regretful,

Donghyuck.

#neowritingsnet #cznnet #nct-writers #dreamwritersnet #nct #nct dream #nct 127 #haechan #haechan nct #nct haechan #lee donghyuck #haechan x reader #haechan imagine #haechan scenario #supernatural nct

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itispossibleihaveissues · 7 years

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Another Perfect Catastrophe -6

AUTHOR: Mikimoo PAIRING: JayDick RATING: Mature

WARNINGS: Non Consensual drug use, Non Consensual touching, Non Consensual kissing, humour, slight mayhem

SUMMARY: Dick goes undercover as himself in order to catch a gang of international thieves. Jason reluctantly tags along as his long suffering bodyguard. During the ensuing mayhem they get to know each other again and build a few bridges.

Thank you to burkesl17 for the beta!

Notes: An embarrassingly long time ago, the amazing and very, very talented Pentapus invited me to do a reverse bang style exchange, and drew me an amazing prompt. I have no idea how this story was the one that emerged from the many options I had, but such is the creative process I guess! Anyhoo, many thanks to Pentapus for both encouragement and patience, and of course the incredible art! (which will be included at the end of the appropriate chapter)

Chapters: 1, 2, 3 4 5

GO HERE FOR THE AMAZING ART BY THE AWESOME PENTAPUS!

Of course, then it all went to shit.

Jason stared at the little dart. Fired by one of those high-tech tranq guns, clearly one he hadn't found and disabled. He didn't know how long the drug took to make you a dopey over-friendly mess, but he suspected it wasn't going to be enough time to get them both to safety.

Fuck this, fuck these people.

He had to give it his best shot though, the embarrassment of being killed by these jerks would haunt him all the way back to the afterlife.

He focused on controlling his breathing in an attempt to slow the passage of the drug though his system, it wasn't much but he was hoping it would gain him a little extra time. He could hear Dick breathing, even and relaxed somewhere to his right, it was calming and helped him steady himself.

Jason felt along the walls by the door, looking for a switch. His fingers felt cheap plastic and with a quick prayer that the electrics were working he flicked the lights on. The dusty bulb flickered to life with the buzz of poor wiring. Jason counted his blessings and took stock of what the cellar had to offer. It was big and dirty, full of chairs and old furniture rather than bottles.

“Dick, help move this in front of the door,” he said, gesturing to the biggest thing he could see that might be draggable.

Dick nodded and started tugging the old wooden chest without question. Jason debated helping, but decided that the exertion would just make the drug affect him faster. He could already feel changes in his system, they didn't have much time left for him to be making sensible decisions. He left Dick to it and had a quick poke around. He found the door that hopefully led to the smugglers’ cave, but it was locked and rusted shut. It was going to be a bitch to get through it, especially while keeping his heart rate down.

Thankfully, Jason was pretty damn good at breaking and entering, having learnt way before being trained by Bruce. He just needed a few tools and a bit of time.

As he worked on the door he was vaguely aware that Dick was still piling crap in front of the entrance hatch. Apparently one of the effects of the drug was suggestibility, it made sense to help get the victim’s bank details and pacify them for the assaults that came after. Jason shuddered remembering Garner's hands on Dick's skin and the way he had looked at them both. He was glad he had killed the fucker.

Jason was feeling distinctly floaty by the time he got the door open, and there was banging on the hatch that Dick had barricaded. Definitely time to go. But first he had a last hunt through the piles of junk, looking for something he could write with. He hit pay dirt with not only a slightly cracked ballpoint pen but also a pad of paper. He wrote himself a short note in big letters, hoping it would be enough to remind him to get away and not do anything too stupid.

“Come on, Dickie, let’s run for it,” he said, heading into the dark tunnel.

Dick trotted along behind him, still oddly passive, while Jason shuddered his way through the drug hitting his system in waves of shivery pleasure. Everything seemed more, it was better somehow. There was no light, but his eyes provided spinning colours though the darkness and the feel of the slightly slimy wall under his fingers shot sensation through his hands. Even the damp, salty smell of the rocks and sand felt amazing when he breathed it. Dick had been right, this shit was fucking nice.

When they emerged at the beach it was almost dark, but the clear sky and last vestige of the setting sun gave them just enough light to see by. It was beautiful; not the white sand and blue sea Dick had been hoping for, but a collection of rocks and a swirling, brown-grey maelstrom of waves and flecks of sea foam.

Dick whooped and ran straight for it, leaping about in the wild surf in his expensive leather shoes. Jason watched him indulgently. He wondered why it had taken him so long to realise how lovely Dick was, he had always thought he was hot, obviously, and always kind of wanted to hit that, but he had never let himself look further than his good looks. It was a damn shame, because there was clearly a lot more to see.

He sat down in the wet sand, enjoying the cold as it soaked through his pants, sending little sparks up to his brain and making him shiver pleasantly. He could sit here for days, watching Dick play in the sea and enjoying the feeling of the breeze on his face and the chill water beginning to lap at his ankles.

His neck was kind of itchy though, but when he went to scratch it, he discovered he was holding a bit of scrunched up paper. It was all crinkly and Jason liked the way it sounded when he waved it around, which he did for a while, until he noticed there was writing on it.

You are on drugs, bad guys are after you, keep running or they will kill you and Dick and every thing will suck.

Love, Jason

Oh no.

Jason did not want the bad guys to kill them, especially now he knew how nice Dick was, so he wobbled to his feet and staggered further into the sea to make a grab for him, he missed the first time and nearly fell over, but he caught hold of his cold, slippery arm in his second attempt.

“Dickie, we gotta go,” he said, his voice sounded funny, slow and sticky like molasses.

“Where?” Dick asked, his hair was wet and his face was full of trust and joy.

Jason grabbed him and pulled him close, he wanted to see if he could suck the expression from his skin. When he tried he could just taste the salt of the sea. It was good, and he licked the water off Dick's lips. He found it was warmed from the heat of him, Dick gasped and pulled him in, kissing him hungrily. Jason melted into the sensation as little sparks of brightness and shivers kicked off in his brain. The warmth from Dick's body was so good with the cold of the water moving around his knees.

This was so awesome.

When he brought his hands up to try and bring Dick even closer, he noticed something in his fingers – a bit of paper.

The note! He was on drugs and bad guys wanted to kill them. “We have to go!” he said, as Dick's cool fingers found their way under his shirt.

“Kissing’s more fun.”

Jason was inclined to agree, but Dick would be a lot less fun to kiss if he was dead, and whoever wrote the note seemed very sure of themselves – presumably it was himself or another man called Jason. It was a pretty common name.

But anyway, getting killed was a terrible plan, so.

“Kiss after running,” he managed.

“More than kissing, I want to fuck you.”

Jason almost allowed himself to get distracted by that. “After running,” he said, stubbornly.

“Or you could do me. I like both.”

“Running,” Jason insisted, although his resolve was wavering. The image of pushing Dick down on the sand and then fucking into the heat of his body made the sparks shoot through him with such force he wobbled slightly, his knees suddenly weak. He probably would have just given into temptation if Dick hadn't taken that moment to capitulate.

He leaned away from Jason, taking the warm with him. “Where?” he asked and gestured widely before staggering a few steps deeper into the sea.

He had a point. The choices were back in the tunnel, climb the cliff or swim around the cove and hope for the best. “Um,” Jason said. The note seemed to assume he would have a more sensible option. “We could swim?” he offered at last.

Dick looked at him, looked at the dark water in front of them and shrugged, “Okay,” he said brightly and started stripping off his shoes and socks.

Jason looked down at his boots. They were his favourite, he had customised them himself, filled them with pouches and sheaths. He didn't want to leave them behind on this beach, he didn't want to leave his jacket or his pants either. But he also didn't want to drown.

He took off his boots, and after a moment of contemplation, his socks. Then he waded out into the sea. He could feel the water sucking him down, and came to the conclusion he was far too heavy to swim, so he sloshed himself back to the shore with long slow strides. He really didn't want to give up his jacket, so he took off his pants and tried again. Nope, leather and body armor was just too much. So he hauled himself back up the beach for a third time, to leave the whole lot sadly by the tunnel entrance. As he blinked back hot tears that felt like fireworks on his skin, he realised he could hear angry voices and noise echoing down the dark entrance way. He turned to see how Dick was doing. Much better it seemed, he was down to his shorts and already wading out.

When he saw Jason watching, he waved. “Which way?” he called, a note of happiness in his voice.

Jason immediately forgot his sadness and splashed his way into the cold water. Dick had asked an important question and he shivered in the chill as he squinted out at the dark water. “To the right?” he suggested at last, it was marginally brighter, maybe from the lights of civilisation. Maybe there would be a bar there, they could get a drink. Maybe go dancing.

Once again, Dick seemed happy to go with his idea and immediately launched himself in that direction. Jason followed, trying to stop the shivers of pleasure as the cool tug of the water set of more sparks on his skin.

They swam for in indeterminable length of time, it was easy at first but soon he started to feel a bit stiff and heavy, the cold and the current seemed to be dragging him down. He tried to lift his head from the waves to see Dick but there was sea water in his eyes, it seemed wrong that the stinging felt good. There was a sudden fear in him, that he had no idea of his own reality, and without it he might drown, and what was worse: he might enjoy it. His chest suddenly felt tight and he sucked in the cold salty water spluttering as some less drugged up part of his brain told him that was a terrible idea.

Then there were hot, cold fingers on his skin, and Dick's voice loud above the crashing of the sea. “It's alright, Jay, I've got you.”

He sounded different, clearer, like he knew what he was doing and wouldn't let Jason drown in this strangely enticing water. Maybe his drugs were wearing off. Jason felt sad for him, the drugs were amazing.

“I can see the beach, Jay, it’s not far,” Dick said, and he tugged at Jason's hand, encouraging him forward.

Jason swam.

#jaydick #Jason Todd #dick grayson #nightwing #red hood #mik trys to write stuff #My writing #My fic #Catastrophe

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