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summahsunlight · 4 years

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This Way Became My Journey, Ch. 23

While the computer was running its diagnostic on the alien device, B'Elanna Torres had snuck away to the mess hall to grab a ration pack for lunch. Well maybe she hadn't really snuck away; Captain Janeway had after all given her permission to take a small break. But it sure felt like sneaking away, with Michael breathing down her neck wanting to know every little thing that came up about the device. Snatching a ration pack up she went to join a Bajoran, by the name of Seska, who was sitting at a table in the middle of the room.

"I didn't think Janeway was ever going to let you leave the bridge," Seska drawled with that sly grin of hers as B'Elanna took a seat.

B'Elanna shrugged her shoulders. "I think she felt bad that her kid was watching over everything I did. Anyways I don't have a lot of time. I need to get back up there to finish working on that device that Chakotay brought back from the planetoid."

"If you ask me this is a waste of time," Seska replied, pushing her empty ration pack to the side. "We shouldn't be chasing after any aliens that like to harvest organs. It could end up getting us all killed."

"Neelix could die if we don't track them down," B'Elanna said, slightly shocked by her friend's cold tone.

It was Seska's turn to shrug her tiny shoulders. "The Doctor has kept him alive this long; that's better than most people can say if they had just had their lungs stolen."

"And what if it was Chakotay that had been attacked? Or Harry? Would you feel the same way?"

"Of course. Neelix should be counting his blessings while the rest of us get to the real work of finding dilithium to help the power shortage," Seska answered, her dark eyes studying B'Elanna's face. "You don't actually agree with Janeway's decision to go chasing after these aliens do you?"

B'Elanna averted her eyes. "To tell you the truth, I think it's rather noble."

Seska scoffed. "One noble deed doesn't make up for her selfish decision to strand us here."

The hatred for Janeway that was laced in Seska's voice was not lost on B'Elanna and the young Klingon woman suddenly found that she was not hungry anymore. Pushing the tray away from her, she looked her friend, or someone she had once regarded as a friend, in the eye. "Seska, I know it hasn't been easy the past month, adjusting to life on a Starfleet ship, but believe me when I say that Captain Janeway has the best intentions of this entire crew at heart."

"You didn't think that way a month ago," Seska pointed out.

B'Elanna shook her head. "No, I didn't. But the past few weeks I've worked closely with her and my opinion has changed. If we had used the array to get home, there would have been people back in the Alpha Quadrant who thought her decision to sacrifice the Ocampa selfish. Either way, she couldn't win."

Seska got up from the table angrily. "You're starting to sound like all those delusional Starfleet idiots."

The Chief Engineer watched as the Bajoran left the table and stalked out of the mess hall. B'Elanna wasn't sure why Seska was having the hardest adjustment out of them all. Perhaps she felt like she had been slighted by Janeway when she wasn't given a higher rank, after all, she was Chakotay's former lover. And then there was B'Elanna's promotion to chief engineer. It was never spoken between the two, but B'Elanna knew that Seska was jealous of her friend's promotion and the trust that Janeway put in her. She also knew that Seska wasn't too keen on all time the B'Elanna had taken to hanging out with Harry Kim in the mess hall or for a stroll on the holodeck. But Harry had been the only one nice to her, on the Starfleet side that is, for their first few days, and she was grateful for that.

It wasn't her fault that she was sliding into fit with the crew and Seska was struggling. She just needs to make friends outside of the Maquis, that's all.

B'Elanna decided that the next time Harry joined her for dinner she was going to ask Seska to join them. She was sure that Harry would be friendly and make an attempt to befriend Seska no matter how unreceptive Seska seemed.

Speaking of Harry, B'Elanna was sure that Janeway had given him a fifteen minute break to eat something as well. Maybe she had missed him when she had first come in the room. Glancing around she soon found that it had been easy to miss him. He was seated at a corner table with Sarah Barrett. B'Elanna instantly felt…jealousy.

She was shocked by this, at first. There was nothing romantically going on between her and Harry so she shouldn't be bothered if there was something between him and the counselor. But then she remembered Elle Platt, back from her Academy days. Elle had the same dark, coffee brown hair as Sarah, same enticing sapphire eyes. B'Elanna had thought Elle had been her friend and had told her about her crush on one of their classmates. They never spoke of it again, until B'Elanna had seen Elle with her crush, cuddling on the lawn one warm afternoon. Elle later told her some story about wanting to keep B'Elanna safe because she only would have been hurt, that her crush never would have dated a half Klingon.

B'Elanna, who had always resented human girls, with their silky locks of hair, and smooth foreheads, had shortly left the Academy after that. So was it this fact that Sarah looked so much like Elle that she was jealous of the time she spent with Harry? And if she ever did want to be more than Harry's friend, how could she compete with the perfection that Sarah was?

She was shocked at this realization. Being more than Harry's friend? He was Starfleet, a nice guy, but still Starfleet. Well what's so wrong with that? They had been through so much together on the Ocampa home world, she had connected with him in a way that she had yet to connect to anyone else on the ship, with maybe the exception of Chakotay. And that's when her emotions switched to jealousy to downright anger.

Sarah could have any man she wanted on this ship, with the bat of her pretty little eyelashes, why was she with Harry? Good, even Tom Paris was eating out of the palm of her hand and she had taken the one guy that B'Elanna actually felt…feelings towards. It figures the one nice guy on this ship—

"Seat taken?"

B'Elanna glanced up to see Tom Paris. She shook her head. "No."

He sat down and dropped his ration pack tray in front of him. His grayish eyes looked up to see what she was looking at and he frowned.

This peaked her curiosity even more. Was Tom's feelings about Sarah more than just wanting a date? B'Elanna suddenly didn't feel so bad that she was not the only one who was jealous on this ship. "Something wrong with the view?" she teased.

Tom only frowned more as Harry and Sarah got up and left the mess hall together, laughing about something. "No, nothing's wrong with the view."

"If I didn't know you any better Paris, I'd say you were jealous," she continued teasing getting up from the table and going to recycle her tray. It was time to get back to working on the alien device and the diagnostic. She would have to push thoughts of Harry aside until further notice.

However, the thoughts of Harry and Sarah eating lunch together, sharing a laugh, just would not escape her no matter how hard she tried to get her work done. Michael Janeway was still standing over her shoulder, soaking in every last bit of information that the computer was coming up with. If that kept up he could his mother the report and B'Elanna could return to engineering where her real work was.

Mindlessly drumming her fingers on the console she noticed Tuvok raise an eyebrow. "Does that form of activity make the computer scan faster?" the Vulcan questioned her.

"No, but it keeps me occupied while we wait." The doors of the bridge swishing open brought her attention about and Paris strode back onto the bridge, no trace of the frown he had worn in the mess hall. How can he let it go so easily? Oh, that's right, he's a pig. He probably has another love interest lined up behind Sarah and the Delaney sisters.

The computer beeping brought her attention about. "Captain," she called out, getting Janeway's attention. "We've completed our diagnostic on the alien device."

Janeway strode over to join the group, which was an odd mix when you really thought about it; a Vulcan, a five year old human boy, and a half Klingon. "What have you got?"

"It appears to be more than a weapon," B'Elanna reported. "It's also a very sophisticated medical scanner and surgical instrument."

"From what we can tell," Tuvok said, handing the device to Janeway, "it uses a neural resonator to stun the victim while a quantum imaging scanner begins a microcellular analysis of the entire body.

"The amount of information this thing can gather puts a tricorder to shame," B'Elanna continued. "You fire this at someone you learn everything about their anatomy, right down to their DNA sequencing."

Janeway turned the device over in her hands. "So we're dealing with aliens who've developed a technology specifically designed for extracting organs from other beings. The question is…why?" Chakotay demanded her attention and she mindlessly put the device down onto the science console.

"The alien ship has dropped out of warp," the first officer reported. "It's approaching a large asteroid."

The captain went to stand on the command station next to Lieutenant Barrett while Tuvok took his own station. "On screen."

"It's entered the asteroid captain," Paris reported.

"Hold position."

There were very little options that Janeway had at this moment. She could either take the ship into the asteroid if it was wide enough or she could try to flush the aliens out some how. But that could take hours, and Neelix didn't have hours. Even though the Doctor had come up with a solution for the time being, no one really knew how long he could survive using holographic lungs, not to mention that if ship's system ever went down and the emitters went off line, Neelix would die.

"MICHAEL!"

The shear volume of Lieutenant Barrett's voice startled everyone on that bridge and all eyes snapped about looking for the child.

The boy was standing at the door to the ready room and immediately Janeway could see that he had the alien device clutched in his little hands. The captain had moved the baby into the ready room so she could comfortably nap and she had no doubt that her son was about to test the device out on his baby sister. How could I be so careless with something that dangerous around? She hadn't even seen Michael move from his spot near the science station, for that matter, neither had B'Elanna. Michael was terribly clever, a trait that Janeway knew had been inherited from her; he could easily slip away from baby sitters, his mother, etc.

So how had Sarah seen it?

Michael looked sheepishly up at his mother. "I just wanted to see Ava's DNA."

His mother gestured that he give her the device back and he complied.

"Sit there," Janeway instructed, pointing to her chair.

Chakotay cleared his throat while the boy did as he was told. "Uh, Captain, we've determined the asteroid is man made."

Fascinating. What's even more fascinating that Sarah knew Michael had that device; another question for another time, perhaps.

"I think I've located where the alien ship entered the asteroid, Captain," Paris was saying bringing their attention about to the situation at hand. "There's an open crater on the limb of the asteroid."

"Let's see it," Chakotay ordered and the viewscreen changed from the image of the asteroid to the opening that Paris had found.

Janeway crossed her arms over her chest. "How large is that crater, Mister Paris?"

"Two hundred meters in diameter."

"Captain," Tuvok cautioned. "May I suggest that you consider carefully what you're about to do?"

"How do you know what I'm about to do?" Janeway asked, raising an eyebrow and glancing at Tuvok.

"I could describe you in detail the psychological observations I have made of you over the past four years," Tuvok answered, calmly. "Which lead me to conclude that you are about to take this ship into the asteroid, but suffice it to say, I know you quite well."

"One of these days, I'm going to surprise you Tuvok," she replied, with a wry grin. "But not today."

Janeway moved back into the command station and briefly looked at her counselor. "I've already consider other options. If Neelix has any chance of surviving, we have to act fast. Red Alert. Mister Paris lay in a course. Mister Tuvok maximum shields, phasers at the ready."

The Captain turned about in the command station and looked hotly at Michael, "And you stay right there and don't touch anything."

"Yes ma'am."

Voyager glided into the asteroid while Janeway made her way down the command steps to stand next to Chakotay and behind Paris. Her eyes watched the screen intently as the cavern's walls began to narrow.

"Captain," Paris said. "I'm reducing power to the aft-thrusters only. This passageway is getting a little too narrow for my taste."

"Use your discretion Mister Paris," Janeway replied, turning towards Tuvok. "Any sign of the alien ship, Commander?"

"We're still following the ion trail," Tuvok answered, "but electromagnetic interference is limiting our sensor range. I'm only able to scan five hundred meters a head of us."

Chakotay asked the next question. "Are there any indications we're being scanned or probed Mister Kim."

"Not yet."

"Sick bay to Bridge. May I enlist the services of Counselor Barrett please?"

Janeway glanced up at the lieutenant. Was it her imagination or did the Doctor sound anxious? "Certainly Doctor, she's on her way, Janeway out." For a moment the women made eye contact. "You heard the Doctor, he needs your help, we're just going to have to handle first contact without you."

#star trek voyager fanfiction #kathryn janeway #chakotay #janeway x chakotay #tom paris #sarah barrett (oc)#tom paris x ofc #harry kim #b'elanna torres #kes #neelix #tuvok #the doctor (emh)#this way became my journey

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kjaneway115 · 6 years

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Star Trek Voyager: Unforgettable

Episode 4.22 “Unforgettable” Stardate 51813.4

Voyager is caught in a battle between two cloaked ships. One of the ships explodes and they receive a comm call from a woman who asks for Chakotay’s help. What is Janeway thinking when a random woman is calling Chakotay’s name over the comm?

Chakotay, Tom and Tuvok beam over to the alien vessel and save the pilot. She asks for asylum. KJ asks, “Who are you and how do you know my first officer?” KJ tells Chakotay to stay with her because she seems to trust him. Chakotay pulls up a chair and sits by her bedside, fascinated by her. She tells him they’ve met before, and he responds that he’s sure he’d remember. Then she tells him that other races can’t remember her race. She tells him they met a month earlier and spent several weeks together. She tells him she came back because she fell in love with him.

C shares with the senior staff what he’s learned. He’s suspicious that she has a hidden agenda. KJ says Chakotay seems overly suspicious, she tells him she’d appreciate his thoughts on whether she’s telling the truth, but he just says “Aye, Captain.”

Chakotay brings Kellin for lunch in the messhall. Chakotay doesn’t like pudding, carrots or fried food. He’s still asking about how they met and what happened the first time. Their initial meeting is over two phasers… eerily reminiscent of his first meeting with KJ… except he’s the one asking for her weapon. Chakotay tells her that he has no memory of a relationship or feelings between them. Kellin is hurt but handles it quickly. The tracers show up looking for her. Their weapons can go right through Voyager’s shields, and Voyager can’t detect them. Kellin says maybe she can help Voyager detect the ships. KJ lets C make the final call - either we give her up or we fire. He says to fire and she agrees. KJ tells Kellin she has to decide what she’s going to do. Kellin replies she wants to stay on Voyager. She asks to make more permanent modifications to Voyager, and Chakotay volunteers to go with her. She teases him with memories of their “last night together.”

Chakotay goes to Neelix looking for something relaxing to help him sleep. Neelix tells Chakotay it’s obvious how Kellin feels about him. Chakotay tells Neelix that falling in love with Kellin “doesn’t seem like me” and that he doesn’t trust her, he’s afraid she’s going to manipulate him, use him for her own purposes. Neelix suggests it’s his own feelings he’s afraid of.

Kellin goes to C’s quarters. She tells him she was sure that they’d regain the feelings they had before, and that’s why she came back. If he feels nothing for her, she says she will leave. He tells her not to go. They sit together in his quarters. He shares ice cream with her. She says that Voyager is a powerful ship and fast. Then she “reenacts” their last night together and kisses Chakotay, telling him she “wanted something to remember him by”.

Tuvok and Chakotay have a cute conversation about where Kellin’s skills would be best used. They are working together and clearly have a mutual respect.

Seven says that courtship rituals seem unnecessary. Harry tries unsuccessfully to explain to her why the rituals are important.

Kellin realizes that there’s a tracer on board the ship. The tracer wipes her memory. She asks Chakotay to help her remember. Chakotay confronts the tracer; he is angry. Chakotay goes to see Kellin and she doesn’t remember him. He tells her that they fell in love and asks her to stay for at least a few days. She replies that she has to go home. She tells him she wishes they had met under different circumstances.

Chakotay writes down what happened with pen and paper. Chakotay tells Neelix he can’t make sense of why she couldn’t fall in love with him again, when he fell in love with her twice. Neelix replies that you can’t analyze love; it’s the greatest mystery of all. “Any one thing might be enough to keep it from igniting.” “And if we could define love, predict it, it would probably lose its power.”

What was his reaction when he found what he had written? Did he ever share it with Kathryn?

Original Airdate: April 22, 1998

Production Number: 190

#voyager #star trek #star trek voyager #unforgettable #chakotay #kellin #s04e22

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fate-motif · 7 years

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i’m forever going to defend the choice of chakotay for the only other man who survived the events of the alternate universe of timeless because honestly? chakotay is the one character aboard of voyager who doesn’t infantilize or underestimate harry.

everyone else constantly underestimates him - janeway is protective of him, b’elanna makes fun of him in a way a big sister would, tom’s always tried to have that ‘cool cat and naive kid’ dynamic with him, tuvok is vocally critical of his flaws for no reason, he’s the butt of the joke every time seven is hostile to him, even neelix sometimes gets in on the action of acting like he’s the kid of the crew when he’s a grown ass man who’s good at his job and simply needs experience - which he then gets, and even then he’s still not good enough for anyone to treat with respect. (causing him to either compulsively doubt himself or be irrationally defensive of his choices even when there may be flaws, which is the whole conflict in timeless.)

but chakotay? i mean, clearly chakotay is professional with harry at every moment when they are on the bridge. he’s commanding, patient, and understanding. (and he was completely fine with being woken up in the middle of the night when harry panicked, holy shit. like, i’d be a little more pissed.) but out of the bridge, chakotay is harry’s friend - and views him as an equal. he’s not condescending or patronizing. he doesn’t see him as new meat. or maybe he did a little at the beginning. but moving on with the seasons and when we see chakotay and harry in casual situations, they’re pretty chill with each other and we never see that little joking condescension we get between harry and every other character on board (with the exception of kes, but we all love to pretend she didn’t exist).

and going back to timeless, this condescension would have led any other character to tell harry to let go. b’elanna, tom. they would have simply gone self-destructive, maybe not blamed him, but if harry had offered the chance to go back, they would have told him to give up. tuvok would never do such a thing, no matter who he lost in voyager. seven might not have felt emotionally compelled to go on such a risky expedition to change the timeline. the one exception would be janeway, given that we all saw what janeway did if put in a similar situation. but harry’s obsession and self-hatred didn’t work for him at the end of the episode, and having two manic, obsessed, mentally-ill trainwrecks of incredibly loyal and clever people at the head of such an operation is incredibly ill-advised.

chakotay is selfish enough to go back in time and save his friends, but also? he values harry as an equal and when presented with the evidence of his work he didn’t shut down harry as someone else might have done. he went along with it. hell, even died for him. because he did! man, it’s so weird to consider than in an alternate timeline chakotay was okay with dying for harry kim.

suddenly that line about harry looking up to chakotay in ‘the fight’ makes perfect sense.

#star trek voyager #chakotay #harry kim #star trek #fandom

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starfleetimagines · 7 years

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Icheb imagine - you’re shy

Requested? Yes, by an anon Word count? 576 Warnings? None

You sipped your tea as your eyes scanned over the PADD which contained your current lesson. After Voyager had found an old Earth vessel stranded on a planet, they rescued you and welcomed you onto the ship. Being shy to begin with, you hadn’t been able to really open up to anyone on the ship yet. It was hard to make friends when A) you didn’t know anybody, and B) you were younger than all of the crew, except for Naomi Wildman and the borg children. The only person that really took it upon themselves to talk to you regularly was Neelix, but that was because he adored children and was the ship’s morale officer.

“Is this seat taken?” a voice asked you.

You reluctantly looked up, seeing Icheb standing a mere two feet from you. “Uh, no, it’s not.”

He frowned slightly. “Mind if I sit with you?”

You shook your head and motioned towards the chair. You put the PADD down to make yourself seem more open and sociable.

He sat and looked at your PADD. “What are you reading?”

“An assignment Commander Chakotay gave me. It’s about the physics of a star ship.”

He nodded. “I quite enjoyed that topic. If you wish, I could help you with it.”

You smiled shyly. “Thanks. I’ll let you know if I need any help.”

Icheb was silent for a few moments, then said, “I can leave if I’m distracting you from your studies.”

“No, I don’t mind,” you said, blushing. “I could use the company. To be honest, it’s been kind of lonely being one of the only people my age on the whole ship.”

“That’s understandable. When I first came on board, I had the other children to keep me company. Seven of Nine was also a big help.”

You nodded, feeling yourself growing a bit more comfortable around him. It was nice to talk to him. “That must have been even harder for you.”

“Why do you say that?” he asked.

“Well . . . you were borg,” you said, then quickly added, “Sorry. You probably don’t want to talk about that stuff.”

Icheb shook his head. “It doesn’t bother me discussing my past. But, you might be right I was used to being with others every second of every day.”

“I don’t mean to sound rude, but why are you sitting here?” you asked softly. “I’m not really the most approachable person.”

“I know,” he said. “That’s why I came over. Seven of Nine told me I should try to talk to you since you tend to keep to yourself. She said it would be a good idea for me to make another friend, and for you to make one.”

“Oh.” You bit your lip. Of course he was only there because Seven of Nine had sort of ordered him to be.

“And I . . . I think you’re cute,” he said slowly, looking down at the table.

Your cheeks burned and you looked up at him. You then realized that he too was shy, or just awkward due to his past. You smiled. “Thank you. That’s very sweet of you to say. You’re not too bad, either.”

He met your gaze, smiling slightly. “If you’d like, we could hang out again sometime. Maybe . . . maybe on the holodeck or something?”

Your smile widened. “I’d love that.”

Icheb said, “I’m glad I sat here with you.”

“I am, too.”

#voyager #star trek voyager #icheb #star trek icheb #icheb imagine #star trek imagine #star trek voyager imagine #star trek imagines #voyager imagine #star trek

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voyagerafod · 7 years

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Star Trek Voyager: A Fire of Devotion: Part 3 of 4: Sweeter Than Heaven: Chapter Ten

Chapter Ten

“I’m not saying you shouldn’t do it,” Samantha Wildman said to Seven of Nine. “I’m just saying that maybe you should try talking to her yourself before going to the Captain.”

Seven of Nine raised an eyebrow. “The Captain asked me to oversee this year’s annual performance reviews. I do not see why I should give a less than accurate report.”

“Let me try this again,” Sam said. “I know Celes is a bit of a, well, she’s…” Sam struggled to find a nice way to convey her point. It wasn’t that she disliked Crewman Tal Celes. She actually found the young Bajoran quite friendly, despite her shyness; a shyness that had only gotten worse in recent years. “She is the most error prone officer on board,” Seven said. “Her work in astrometrics always needs to be double-checked.” “I know that,” Sam said. “Believe me, I know, she did a rotation in the lab before you came on board and... don’t even get me started. My point is though, what exactly can be gained by relieving her of duty? It’s not like she can just hop on the next shuttle back to Bajor. Isn’t there something she might be good at? You could just have the Captain transfer her.” “Where?” Seven said. “The problem is obviously not her skills, at least not based on what I saw in her academy records. The problem would seem to be that she has failed to adapt to Voyager’s situation.” “Probably,” Sam said. “Still don’t see what relieving her of duty would do. Again, she doesn’t exactly have any place else to go.” “Perhaps she could aid Neelix in the kitchen,” Seven said. Sam didn’t think that was necessarily a bad idea, but she was skeptical it would work. She couldn’t think of a reason not to try it though, and she was about to tell Seven just that when the room’s comm system chirped. “Janeway to Seven of Nine,” the Captain said. “Yes, Captain?” Seven said. “Do you have the reports I requested ready?” “I do,” Seven said. “Shall I forward them to your ready room?” “Go ahead and bring them personally,” Janeway said. “And bring Samantha with you. I have something I’d like to discuss with her.”

Had Janeway’s tone not been fairly jovial, Sam might’ve been worried about being summoned to meet with the Captain. With the exceptions of promotions, one on ones with the Captain were rarely about anything good, and Sam had never put in for a promotion her entire career. “On our way, Captain,” Sam said. The comm closed, and Sam bit her lower lip. “Why do I have a bad feeling about this?” “Because you’ve developed something of a fatalistic attitude in recent years?” Seven suggested. “Honey, remember that conversation we had about tact?”

---

“We’ll be passing through a class-T cluster in the next couple of days,” Captain Janeway said to Seven and Samantha as the two stood across from her in her ready room, “It’s not important enough to alter course, but I think it’s at least important enough to send out the Delta Flyer to get a full range of scans.” “I assume that’s why I’m still here, Captain?” Seven said. “You do have my report.” “A reasonable assumption,” Janeway said, “but an incorrect one.” Janeway stood up, and moved around to the front of her desk, and leaned back, arms crossed. “I’m piloting the Flyer for this mission, and I’m planning on taking a few crew members with me who I think could use some special attention.” “Oh no,” Sam muttered. “Samantha,” Janeway said, “you can’t stay on the ship forever. Sooner or later a time’s going to come when you need to leave, be it for good or bad reasons. You weren’t planning on staying on board once we got back to the Alpha Quadrant were you?” “Well, no, but…” “So the sooner we deal with this newfound phobia of yours the better,” Janeway said. “Captain,” Seven said, “while I personally agree that Samantha should not be afraid to go on away missions, especially those that would allow her to continue practicing her field of xenobiology, I’m not sure ordering her to go on a Delta Flyer mission is the wisest course of action.” Samantha nodded vigorously. Captain Janeway understood why, considering how badly her first and so far only mission in the Flyer had gone. But in the almost year and a half since then, Voyager had come across so many planets with some astonishing alien fauna, the very thing that Ensign Wildman had joined Starfleet to study in the first place, and she had passed on the chance to see every single one of them. “I’m afraid I’m going to have to pull rank this time, Ensign. You and two other crew members yet to be determined will join me on the Flyer at 1300 hours.” Sam looked like she wanted to protest, but instead simply nodded. Janeway couldn’t help but notice that her hands were shaking at her sides. “Permission to speak freely, Captain?” Seven said. “When have you ever not?” Janeway said, smiling. “I think this is ill-advised,” Seven said. “If this were a planetary mission I might be willing to assist in encouraging Sam to go along, but the data astrometrics has on the cluster you are ordering her to go into is incomplete. If I can’t dissuade you from following through on this order, at least allow me to go with her.” “Request denied,” Janeway said to Seven. To Samantha she said, “Sam, this is an order, but I want you to know that if after the mission is over, you still want to be kept off the away mission roster, I’ll honor that. I just feel you’ve let a few bad experiences cloud your judgment. While it doesn’t seem like it sometimes, well more than half our away missions are uneventful, and of the ones that aren’t we know going in the situation will be difficult and we plan accordingly. And I would never send you on one of those kinds of missions under any circumstance. You’re a biologist, not a security officer.” Sam looked at Seven.

“If you don’t want to go, Sammy, I can talk to Chakotay, maybe convince him to-” “No, it’s okay, Annie,” Sam said, eyes closed, and visibly nervous. “I’ll do this. I can do this. There aren’t any plasma storms nearby are there?” “No,” Seven said.

Sam stood at attention, took a deep breath, and looked Janeway in the eye. “I’ll be ready by 1300 hours, Captain,” she said. Janeway smiled. “See you then. Dismissed.”

---

Chakotay wondered to himself how many ways he could tell the Captain that one of the three crew members she’d chosen for the mission was a mistake without outright committing insubordination. He settled instead for saying “Are you sure?” for the third time in almost as many minutes.

“I understand your concerns,” Captain Janeway said. “But if we don’t get Tassoni more integrated into the crew soon he’s going to become a problem.”

“He does his job, but only to the bare minimum. He follows orders, but in the most passive-aggressive fashion possible. He refuses to even try to interact with the rest of the crew, including his former shipmates. If you insist on taking someone from the Equinox with you on this mission, why not one of the others?”

“The others are at least trying, to varying degrees of success. Tassoni acts like we’re going to kick him off the ship any day now so ‘why bother.’ I want to make it clear to him that there can be a place for him on this crew.” Chakotay shook his head. “And if he doesn’t want to be?” Janeway sighed, and shrugged. Chakotay figured that she didn’t really have a good answer to that question. “If I can’t talk you out of this,” he said, “I at least insist you keep a phaser on you, just in case.” Janeway chuckled. “I appreciate the concern, but Tassoni has shown no inclination towards violence since coming aboard.”

“I know that,” Chakotay said, “but better safe than sorry.” “We’ll be fine with the phasers that are stocked on the Flyer normally,” Janeway said. “I doubt we’ll need them giving where we’re going but as you say, better safe than sorry.” Chakotay simply nodded. He didn’t like it, but he had backed his Captain on more questionable decisions than this in the past. If he had truly felt that she was needlessly endangering herself and others, he’d push back. He’d done it before, and despite how ugly that had gotten, they still respected each other after it was over.

“Well,” he said, “have fun.” “I intend to,” Janeway said.

---

“I have to admit, Brian,” Marla Gilmore said to Brian Sofin, the two of them sitting in a corner of the mess hall having lunch, “I figured it would bother you that Angelo got to go on an away mission before you did.” “No, it’s okay,” Sofin said. “It still amazes me sometimes how few people will give me a dirty look anymore. Is less than a year all it really takes to get over someone stealing a key piece of technology from you and leaving you to die?” “I think that a lot of it has to do with the fact that the man who ordered us to do that is dead,” Marla said. “But yeah, I get the feeling. Sometimes when I’m in engineering, it feels like people are treating me like I’ve always been part of the team.” She sipped her tea, glanced at the various other crew members chatting and enjoying their meals, while Neelix stirred something in one of his massive pots. “Marla? You still with us?” Sofin said. “Yeah, just thinking. On the one hand, I look at these people and think that they never would’ve done what we did. On the other…”

“They had it a lot easier than us,” Sofin said. “Easy being relative of course. Most of this ship’s senior staff were dead before they even knew what hit them. And we didn’t have to deal with a Cardassian spy or Betazoid serial killer.” Marla rolled her eyes. “I think I’d take both of those things times two before dealing with the Ankari spirits of good fortune again.” Sofin shrugged. “Yeah, fair point.” “Have you talked to Angelo at all? Since Ransom died I mean.” “Only once. He didn’t say it directly, but I think that he thinks you, me, and James betrayed the Captain; sold him out.” “You told him that Captain Ransom helped save us, right? That Burke was the one who got the rest of our shipmates killed?”

“I did. So did James.” Sofin finished the last of his food. “I hope getting to go on an away mission again will snap him out of it. He was a good officer back before we started killing those aliens for fuel. Maybe he can be again. I’d certainly feel better about him being in security.”

“How does that work, by the way?” Marla said. “How can he be on the security team if he isn’t allowed to have a phaser yet?”

“You’d have to ask someone else,” Sofin said. “I don’t really get to talk to the security people.”

---

Captain Janeway flew the Delta Flyer away from Voyager, her three charges situated behind her. She had put Angelo at the tactical station despite the unlikeliness of needing to use the ship’s weapons. Samantha took the seat behind him, refusing the one directly behind Janeway at the helm. She explained that it had been the chair she was in when the Flyer had crashed last year, so Janeway didn’t argue. Tal Celes took that seat instead, monitoring the sensors, and glad to do so as the young Bajoran was convinced that was one of the few things she was good at.

As soon as the Flyer went into warp, Janeway began the mission briefing. “Once we reach the cluster,” she said, “we’ll drop out of warp and maintain one-quarter impulse on the sweep through the protostars. Celes, you’re going to be running an ongoing sensor analysis. Samantha, you’ll be looking at subspace particle decay for anything new we might learn about star formation. I know that’s not your field, but I can assist you along the way. Mister Tassoni, your job will be to look for signs of life, a long shot in this environment, but it’s something to do.” “Captain,” Tassoni said, keeping his voice polite, but still rolling his eyes, “I know it’s not my field either, but I do know enough about these types of clusters that if we find any planets at all they’ll be gas giants.”

“They could have moons,” Samantha said. “Captain, I have to ask again why you insisted on bringing me along. Haven’t my former friends done more to earn this opportunity than I have?” “Former?” Janeway said. She’d heard of course, on several occasions, that Tassoni was never seen interacting with the other Equinox survivors, but this detail was news to her.

“They don’t appreciate what Captain Ransom did for us, the sacrifices he was willing to make, even his own conscience, to save us. They think they have to apologize for doing what we needed to to survive. I won’t.” The cabin of the Flyer got uncomfortably quiet. Janeway could see Samantha’s left hand from the helm chair and saw that it was clenching and unclenching. Celes looked like she wished she could melt into the bulkhead and not have to listen to any of this.

“I’m not here to rehash arguments about what Captain Ransom did,” Janeway said. “I’m here to see if you can function as part of a team without being rude to your teammates. I can see we’re off to a bad start, but let��s call this a dry run and start over. Mister Tassoni, your job will be to look for signs of life in the cluster.” Tassoni narrowed his eyes briefly, but nodded. “Aye, Captain.”

Janeway turned back around to keep an eye on the helm console. Tassoni was right about one thing, there was no point in trying to change his mind. He truly felt that under the circumstances, Ransom did the right thing. She disagreed, but while there would be a time and place to address the larger issues of that incident, it wasn’t now. Not while they all had to live together. A Federation inquiry once they all got back to the Alpha Quadrant would decide ultimately what to do, if anything, with the Equinox survivors. Her job was simply to keep them alive and make sure they did their jobs. So far, at least as far as she was concerned, that was mostly working. Angelo Tassoni though would have to learn to dial back his attitude, and with any luck, this mission would help make that happen.

---

Samantha found herself about to drift off. She didn’t usually get tired on away missions, but she had failed to get a full night’s rest before she had to leave. Seven of Nine had been very supportive of her, even providing her with a thermos of Sam’s favorite flavor tea before leaving, but no amount of coddling from her wife was going to make this any easier. She was tired and waiting for the other shoe to drop. Which it seemed to almost immediately, as mere seconds after dropping out of warp the Delta Flyer shook. Samantha gripped the edge of the console so hard her hands hurt. “Engine status?” Captain Janeway said.

“Within parameters,” Tal Celes said.

“Anything on sensors?”

Sam took a deep breath, let go of the edge of the console, and began manipulating the controls. “Uh, nothing. Might’ve just been a hiccup with the impulse drive.” “Not unheard of,” Janeway said, “but rare. I’m going to take a look at it. In the meantime, I think we’re due for lunch. Celes, head below and see what Neelix packed for us.”

“Aye, Captain,” Celes said. Sam had to admit, she couldn’t remember the last time she’d heard the young Bajoran sound so confident. She seemed to like it out here. Perhaps, she thought, when we get back she can transfer to a smaller ship. Some people just prefer tighter spaces.

A console near Janeway beeped, and she looked at it. “Sam, can you identify the source of that spatial fluctuation?” “What fluc-” Sam’s request for additional information was violently interrupted by the Delta Flyer shaking hard enough to nearly send her to the floor. Not again, not again, she thought. The stars out side became swirls, a sign that the Flyer was spinning wildly, only the inertial dampeners keeping the four people inside from being pinned to the bulkhead.

The Captain, struggling with the controls the whole time, finally managed to get the ship stabilized. “What the hell was that?” Tassoni said, checking his monitors. “Were we attacked?” “I don’t know,” Janeway said. “We need to get propulsion back on line first, then we can figure out what hit us.” “I can’t see anything on sensors,” Sam said. “Same here,” Celes said. “But whatever hit us tore a section of plating off the outer hull. Ninety percent of our anti-matter has been neutralized. The reaction’s cold. So much for warp drive.” “Impulse engines are still operational, but they’ve been damaged,” Janeway said. “We won’t be able to go faster than 1/8th impulse. We’ll have to call Voyager to come pick us up. Is the subspace transmitter working?” “Affirmative,” Tassoni said. “Delta Flyer to Voyager,” Janeway said, “we’ve been hit by an unknown phenomenon and have taken heavy damage. We require assistance.” Janeway hit a button. “Transmit that message continuously on all subspace frequencies,” she said to Samantha.

“I think I know what got us,” Celes said, “A dark matter protocomet.”

“A what?” Sam said, knowing what dark matter and comets were, but having never heard of one of the latter made out of the former. “I read a paper on those once,” Janeway said. “If I remember right, the theory was anything like that would be attracted to any source of antimatter and neutralize it upon contact. Are you sure that’s what hit us, Celes?” “Mostly,” Celes said, her more normal shy personality reasserting itself. “I went to the academy with the guy who wrote that paper. I remembered him talking about it, otherwise I would’ve never thought to look. I know it’s not something to normally look for but…” “But if you’re right, we may have evidence that will make your former classmate very happy,” Janeway said, smiling. “Good thinking.”

Sam smiled herself, despite the situation. While she longed to be back on Voyager with her family, she took some small comfort in finally seeing a crewmate who had fallen behind her peers have the chance to step things up. She also couldn’t help but note that Angelo Tassoni had gotten far more professional once things started to go bad.

Perhaps some good will come out of this mess after all, Sam thought. I just wish I wasn’t here to see it.

“Should we eject our remaining antimatter?” Tassoni said. “If it attracts these protocomets we might get hit again.”

“Not yet,” Janeway said. “We may still have a chance to get the warp drive back on-line.” “We may not survive another hit,” Celes said. “Ma’am,” she added quickly. If the Captain was offended by her speaking out of turn she gave no sign of it.” “A few more minutes,” Janeway said. “Understood,” Celes said. “Also, Captain, if it’s alright, we should bring the damaged hull plating aboard. It’s only ten kilometers away. Impact from a dark matter body might’ve left something valuable on it that could help us detect any further such bodies. If we can get a decent warning if another protocomet approaches…”

“We can dump the antimatter we have left and save the ship,” Janeway said. “Good thinking, Crewman. Do we have transporters?” “Yes,” Tassoni said. “I’ve already found the plate, and am locking on right now.”

“Good,” Janeway said. “Beam it to the aft section. Celes, come with me. Sam, Angelo, continue repairs.”

“Yes ma’am,” Tassoni said. “On it, Captain,” Samantha said. Once Celes and Janeway exited the cabin, Sam let out a heavy sigh and rubbed her eyes. “Figures,” she muttered under her breath. “What was that, Ensign?” Tassoni said. “I’m saying it figures. I didn’t want to leave the ship because the last several times I have, something had gone wrong. And what happened to us today?” “That sounds like an incredible run of bad luck,” Tassoni said, not sounding as sympathetic in tone as the words implied. “Not that I would know, most of my bad days were on a ship.” “I didn’t mean to-” “Offend me? No, I know,” Tassoni said. “I’m just trying to say that I understand how you feel.” “That’s a bit of an understatement,” Samantha said. “Annie told me what a mess the Equinox was when we found you.” “Annie?” Tassoni said. “Oh, sorry. I thought you knew that Seven of Nine’s birthname was Annika.” “No,” Tassoni said. “I knew that she still went by her Borg designation, but I’d figured she just didn’t remember her name.” “No. For the record though, she only lets me call her that so…” “Understood,” Tassoni said.

---

Captain Janeway ran her tricorder over the hull fragment now lying on the floor. Once she was done scanning the entire chunk of metal, she handed it off to Tal Celes. “Download this into the main computer,” she said, now looking at the debris. “It looks like it was sheared off rather than blown off.”

Celes began working at a console near the back of the room, looking tense. “Everything alright, Crewman?” “Fine, Captain. It’s just… I’m sorry I spoke out of turn earlier, about the antimatter.” “It was a valid point,” Janeway said. “I guess so,” Celes said. “You doubt yourself too much, Crewman,” Janeway said. “I should. And you should too. My work always needs to be double-checked, as I’m sure you’ve been told before. I imagine I’d have been kicked out of astrometrics a long time ago, but I think being married has softened Seven of Nine a little bit.”

“We all make mistakes,” Janeway said. “Even me,” she added, several of the ones she considered her biggest coming to the forefront of her mind, threatening to distract her.

“Every day? Every time you report for your shift? On Voyager, it doesn’t matter because nothing I do is that critical. Seven doesn’t trust me with anything important. The crew is protected from my mistakes there, but out here I could get us killed.” “The reason we know what hit us is because of you, Celes,” Janeway said, trying to bolster Celes’s spirits without pushing too hard. “You showed evidence of unconventional thinking on your application. That’s why I accepted you to the post when your name came up.” “I only know what hit us because of something someone else said to me one time,” Celes said. “So? Trust me, Crewman, my senior staff have pulled ideas that saved our ship out of places much darker than your memory,” Janeway said with a smirk. Celes chuckled. “I appreciate the vote of confidence, Captain, but you have to understand. To you, this is just data. To me, it’s a monster with fangs and claws. In my nightmares, I’m chased by algorithms. My brain just wasn’t built to understand this.”

“We could find you another post on Voyager,” Janeway said, though she had to admit to herself that she wasn’t sure where.

“I don’t think there is any place for me there. Not unless you need a waitress in the mess hall.” “There’s more to duty than the ability to manipulate algorithms. Everybody on Voyager has showed a courage far beyond what I could’ve expected considering the circumstances.”

“I appreciate the thought, Captain. And I’m happy that you want me to do well. But I don’t deserve to be on your ship. I’m not really a part of Voyager. I just live there. If it takes long enough for us to get home, eventually even Naomi, or Icheb, or probably even Angelo Tassoni will outrank me. I accept that.”

Janeway sighed. She wished she had a trained counselor onboard. She was starting to realize that this level of low self-esteem was beyond her ability overcome. She had managed to inspire her crew during tough times, but she couldn’t get this one Bajoran woman to see herself as anything but a failure. That fact broke her heart.

---

Six hours later, with no reply from Voyager, but also no further impacts, Samantha and the others gathered around to hear Captain Janeway’s report. “Our scans of the hull fragment were inconclusive,” Janeway said. “We found some displaced positrons, which are consistent with a dark matter impact, but could’ve been caused by something else. If we try to recalibrate our sensors with this little information we could end up with either a bunch of false alarms, or completely fail to catch the protocomet that finishes us off. Though I take the fact that we haven’t been hit by anything else yet as a good sign.” She touched the screen and a map came up. Sam wondered where this was going. “There’s a gas giant only a few hours from our current position,” Janeway said. “T-class, surrounded by orbital rings, including one that’s radiogenic.”

“We could use those particles to reinitialize our warp core reaction, right?” Celes said. Sam couldn’t help but notice that what confidence she’d gained during the initial crisis had faded away in the interim. “Exactly,” Janeway said, smiling and nodding at Celes. “With only ten percent of our antimatter left, we’d only be able to make warp two, but that’s a hell of a lot better than our current pace. Everyone clear on the plan?”

Samantha nodded, and saw that everyone else was too. “All right,” Janeway said. “Let’s do this.”

As the crew took their seats to begin the journey, there was suddenly a brief shudder. Sam thought for a moment that they would need to eject the core after all, but it stopped just as quickly as it had started. “I doubt that was another protocomet,” Janeway said. “If it was I-” Sam said, her thought cut off by a noise that seemed to be coming from nowhere, but was getting louder. “Find the source of that sound,” Janeway said. Sam grabbed a tricorder and opened it, seeing that everyone else except for the Captain had too. They all scanned around them, and when they reached the source, a look of dread appeared on everyone’s face, none more so than Angelo Tassoni, who looked at his tricorder in visible fear. “Oh no,” he said.

Suddenly, Tassoni vanished in a haze of green light, like some sort of transport beam. “What the hell?” Samantha yelled. “That’s impossible!” Celes said.

“Where is he?” Janeway said. Sam and Celes each bolted to the console nearest to them. Sam frantically tried to find any sign of him; his bio-signature, his comm badge, anything. “I can’t locate him,” she said, “He’s not out there. Not in space, not in sub-space…”

A brief noise similar to the longer, louder one that had preceded Angelo’s disappearance came and went, and as soon as it ended, Tassoni reappeared right where he’d been sitting, looking exhausted. With a groan, he fell over.

Sam went to him, Celes right next to her scanning him with a tricorder while Sam looked for visible signs of injury, eventually seeing a cut on the back of his neck.

"Inside... me..." Tassoni said. Sam gasped and nearly fell backwards as a creature of some sort could be seen moving around under his skin. Sam felt a tap on her shoulder, and saw Janeway behind her and Celes, motioning for both of them to head to the aft compartment, while she helped Tassoni to his feet. “Activate the transporter,” Janeway said, though to whom she was too close to panic to be certain. “Try to get a lock on whatever’s inside him.” Tassoni was panting, sweating, and barely able to stand. Janeway waved Sam over while Celes went to a console and frantically began manipulating the controls. “Help me get him into the bio-bed,” Janeway said, pressing a button. The bio-bed slid out of the wall, and the two women got the man into it quickly. Janeway took out her own tricorder and began scanning him. “The tricorder isn’t picking up anything,” Janeway said, sounding worried. “But I can feel it,” Tassoni said.

“I-I can’t get a lock,” Celes said, sounding equally scared. Sam desperately wanted someone to remain calm in this situation, but was afraid that it would have to be herself. “It’s like something’s there but it’s not there.”

“Oh, it’s there,” Tassoni said. “Unfortunately,” Janeway said, feeling at Tassoni’s sides with her bare hands, “I have to agree.”

“Maybe we weren’t hit by a protocomet after all,” Sam said. “No comet I ever heard of could do something like this.” “Think about it,” Janeway said. “Sensors can’t find this thing, transporters can’t lock on to it… Maybe this is some kind of dark matter lifeform.” “That can’t be right,” Sam said, trying to come up with an alternate explanation in her mind, but failing. Still, it had to be wrong. “Molecules that complex would collapse under their own weight. They could never support life.”

“It’s the best theory we got right now,” Janeway said to Sam. She looked down at Tassoni. “Angelo, where did they take you?”

“I don’t know,” Tassoni said, far more calm than Sam would’ve expected but still visibly in considerable pain. “It was dark, hot, there was breathing all around me. I tried to speak but there wasn't enough air. I tried to move, but something was pressing down on me.”

“Should we sedate him?” Sam asked. “If we do that it might lower his immune response,” Janeway said. “I don’t like seeing him like this either, but I don’t want to take that chance. Angelo?” “I understand, Captain,” Tassoni said. “You should put up a force field around the bio-bed. Just in case this thing breaks out of me.” Sam couldn’t believe how matter-of-factly the man had described something that could potentially lead to a very painful death, but then she remembered that this was a man who’d lived with the threat of certain death hanging over him for years. “Celes,” Janeway said, “come with me. Sam, stay with him.” “Understood,” Sam said. She hoped the Captain had some idea of how to help their colleague. She walked over to the bio-bed, as close as she could get without hitting the force field, and, as silly as it made her feel, tried to engage Angelo Tassoni in small talk.

---

“I’m setting a course for those rings,” Janeway said as she sat in the pilot’s seat. “Shunt as much power as you can to those impulse engines. Maybe we can get just a little more than 1/8th impulse.”

“We never should’ve left Voyager,” Celes said, sighing sadly as she followed Janeway’s orders. Janeway tried but failed not to smirk, glad that Celes wasn’t looking at her. “Voyager’s not exactly a safe haven either, Crewman. The Vidiians, the Kazon, the Borg, Species 8472, the Malon, I could go on and on.” “That doesn’t make me feel any better, Captain.” Celes said. “Just trying to put things in perspective. We’ve been chased across this quadrant by things far worse than whatever’s doing this to Angelo.” “I’ve got you three more percentage points of impulse,” Celes said. “I’ll take it,” Janeway said. “Good work. Have you considered engineering?” “What?” “If you feel that astrometrics isn’t right for you-” “Captain, is this really the time for this?”

“Perhaps not,” Janeway said. “But unless something changes with Angelo, there’s not much else we can do until we reach those rings.”

“Fair enough, ma’am, but I’d honestly rather not think or talk about my career right now.” Janeway couldn’t argue that point, so she respectfully stopped talking. The silence for the next few moments was uncomfortable, but Janeway decided it was best to just let Celes do her work. “Incoming transmission,” Celes said, sounding shocked. Janeway was shocked herself. “Source?” she said. “It’s a Starfleet frequency,” Celes said. “Must be Voyager.” The comm system activated, and at first the signal coming through was all static, but as it gradually faded, Janeway sighed heavily as she recognized her own voice, and her own words. Then she noticed something. Certain words were repeating, and not like an echo, but several times for one word, but only twice for another. There didn’t seem to be a pattern in it, but that didn’t mean there wasn’t one. “Subspace echo,” Celes said, her voice cracking. “Maybe not,” Janeway said. “There’s a .005 deviation in the carrier wave. Recognize that number?” “From our scans of the hull fragment, yes,” Celes said. “But what could that mean?” “They’re bouncing our own distress signal back to us,” Janeway said. “But modified. They might be trying to communicate. Try to adjust the universal translator for-” “Captain!” Samantha Wildman yelled. Janeway turned to see Angelo Tassoni, pale, but walking upright. “I don’t know how, but he went right through the force field,” Sam added.

“Angelo,” Janeway said, her hand moving close to a panel where she knew a hand phaser was kept, “what are you doing?”

“I’m not doing anything,” Tassoni said through gritted teeth. “It’s controlling me. I can’t stop it. You’ll have to stop it.” “How? Janeway said. Tassoni directed his gaze towards the panel that Janeway had her hand near. “Do it,” he said. Janeway quickly opened the panel, took out the phaser, and was glad to see it was already on a low stun setting. She fired, hitting Tassoni square in the chest, He yelped, and fell back, but remained conscious.

“It’s in my shoulder,” he said, tearing up, the pain clearly getting to be too much. The alien, whatever it was, ripped through the skin on Tassoni’s neck where the cut they’d seen earlier had been and lept onto a console. It reminded Janeway of a millipede, only much larger, and glowing black and purple. Its tiny legs began manipulating controls on the console, equally purple sparks of energy coming from it as it did so.

“It’s tapping into our systems,” Celes said, panic entering her voice. “Wait,” Janeway said, “it might be trying to communicate.” The console’s lights began flickering. Soon, sparks began exploding from the console. “It’s in our environmental controls,” Celes said. “We’ve got to stop it.” “Wait,” Janeway said again, but Celes had already found another phaser and fired at the alien, vaporizing it. Janeway knocked the phaser out of her hand. “What the hell did you do?” she said. “It was trying to kill us,” Celes said. “I had to. I’m sorry.” “You don’t know that for certain,” Janeway said. “I heard its thoughts, Captain,” Tassoni said. “When it left me, I could hear what it was thinking. ‘Do not belong.’ That’s what it said.” “It didn’t belong on the Delta Flyer?” Janeway asked. “Or it could mean that we don’t belong in this part of space,” Samantha said. “Prophets forgive me,” Celes said. “What if it was just trying to survive? What did I do?”

“We can discuss this later,” Janeway said. “If it was hostile, it probably has friends who will come after us. We need to get to those rings to-” The Flyer shook violently, sending nearly everyone toppling to the floor. “We just lost another section of hull,” Celes said, managing to take a seat at the nearest console. “How far are we from the gas giant?” Janeway said. “200,000 kilometers,” Celes said. “I’m taking the Flyer into the radiogenic ring,” Janeway said. “With any luck they won’t follow.” “We can’t survive in there for more than a few minutes,” Celes said. “That should be enough to reinitialize the warp core,” Janeway said. As she flew the Delta Flyer into the rings, she wondered if this situation was avoidable. The more thought she gave it though, she realized that there was no right answer. The odds were roughly 50/50 that the alien was either trying to communicate and the environmental controls were an accident, or it was trying to kill them and Tal Celes had done the right thing. Regrettably, she doubted she’d ever know.

“Start continuous transport of radiogenic particles directly into the reaction chamber. When it’s approaching critical mass, let me know.” She got up and headed to the back of the cabin to check on Tassoni. “Watch for any sign of pursuit.” Tassoni sat on the floor, leaned back against the bulkhead, looking exhausted, but also relieved. Janeway imagined that, despite how painful the exit look, having the creature gone was a great relief to him. “How are you doing?” she asked. “Mildly amused by the irony of it all,” Tassoni said. “I survive the Equinox, only to end up nearly getting killed by a creature I didn’t do anything to.” “This situation isn’t anything like what happened on your old ship,” Janeway said. “You didn’t do anything wrong here. This is on me. I ordered the three of you out here.”

“I know,” Tassoni said. “They’re in pursuit,” Celes called out from her station, sounding worried. “I’ve got multiple subspace variations, all of them .005, and all of them converging on our positions from the aft.”

“Shit,” Janeway muttered under her breath, quickly moving back to the helm. “How long do we have?” “Three minutes, twenty seconds,” Celes said. “We’ll need twice that to reinitialize warp reaction,” Samantha said. I got them into this, Janeway thought. It’s up to me to give them a chance to get back to Voyager. “Get in the escape pods,” she said. “Captain?” Samantha said. “Plot a course away from the planet,” Janeway said. “I’m going to fire a phaser volley and hopefully set off a chain reaction of the radiogenic particles. It might be enough to disable our friends.”

“You’ll be disabled too,” Tassoni said, having recovered enough to take a seat behind Celes. “Not if I go to full thrusters and keep in front of the shockwave,” Janeway said. “There’s no guarantee we could get the pods to a safe distance in time, Captain,” Samantha said. “As my wife would say, this is highly inadvisable plan.” “How would you say it, Sam?” Janeway said, smirking. “With language that I would never use in front of my daughter, ma’am,” Samantha said.

“She’s right,” Celes said. “About the escape pods I mean, not the language. And Angelo is in no shape to pilot an escape pod. We’re staying.” “Are you disobeying an order, Crewman?” Janeway said. “No, Captain,” Celes said. “You didn’t phrase it as an order.” Under less tense circumstances, Janeway would’ve called Celes out for using semantics to get around what she’d told her to do. Instead, she had to admit she was actually rather proud of Celes finally standing up for herself. I must be getting soft in my old age, she thought. “You know,” Janeway said dryly, “most of the time, mutineers are trying to kill their Captains, not save them. You’ve made your choice. Hang on tight. Charge phaser banks and divert all available power to thrusters. How close are our pursuers?”

“Sixty-five seconds to intercept,” Celes said. “Stand by to fire, on my mark,” Janeway said. “Hey, Celes?” Tassoni said. “You ever consider tactical? You’re doing pretty good at this.” “Not now,” Celes said, focusing on her console. “Fire,” Janeway said. Janeway couldn’t see the phaser beams as they were firing from the aft, but the light of the explosion began to fill the edges of the forward view port, even as she pushed the controls as hard as she could, actually grateful that Tom Paris had insisted on more old-fashioned tactile flight controls when he’d designed the Flyer. Having something she could grip rather than simply tap gave her more of a feeling of control, one she needed as the ship shuddered, the shockwave getting closer. A violent shake, much more than what they were already facing, caught her off guard, and she felt her head hit something, and her vision go blurry.

---

“Captain!” Celes yelled. Samantha moved forward to see if the Captain was alive. She was, but was clearly out of it, breathing, but her eyes closed. “Auto-pilot is off-line,” Tassoni said. “We’re starting to turn back into the shockwave. The captain must’ve pulled the control when she went down.” “I don’t know how to fly this thing,” Celes said, starting to panic, though Samantha could only barely make out the words over the noise of the ship shaking. This is it, she thought. The Delta Flyer’s going to kill me after all. Suddenly, random memories came to her. Skiing with Seven of Nine. Teaching Naomi how to do her hair. Showing Icheb how to work an electron microscope. “Screw this,” Samanta said. “I’m gonna live.” She got into the pilot’s seat, and looked at the controls. She cursed Tom Paris for having insisted on controls similar to older ships, as her only piloting experience, limited though it was, was on standard issue Starfleet shuttles with touchscreen controls. Still, she had watched Tom piloting it that week where she had nearly died along with Paris and Tuvok. She hoped it would be enough. She took the controls, and got the Flyer back on course as best she could, nearly overtaxing the inertial dampeners in the process.

---

Seven of Nine was prepared to offer whatever comfort Samantha needed once she was cleared from sickbay with the others who had been on the Delta Flyer. She did not suspect that she would not need to. Seven entered sickbay, and before she could say a word, Samantha threw her arms around Seven, kissing her hard on the lips before pulling back. “Oh, Annie, it was, wow. I’ve never felt anything like that before. Was it like that for you?” “Was, what?” “Saving people. Getting to be the hero.” “I don’t under-” “I brought them home,” Samantha said, smiling, breathing heavily, barely able to stand still. Seven was concerned that she was having some form of attack. “I saved us. I flew the ship. I stabilized it so we wouldn’t get destroyed in the shockwave. I’ve never saved anyone’s life before. It’s so exciting, I can barely even speak.”

“Are you sure about that part?” Seven said, wanting to be happy that Sam was happy, but instead feeling confused. “I know things didn’t go as smoothly as the Captain planned,” Samantha said, finally slowing down, “but it was worth it. I’m not afraid to leave the ship anymore.” Seven titled her head. “I was led to believe that phobias were not so easily cured.” “Cured, no,” The Doctor said, “but what Sam had wasn’t a true phobia. Not in the medical sense of the word anyway.”

Seven felt Samantha’s hands on her behind, squeezing gently. “You wanna know something else getting to be the hero makes me feel?” Sam said. “I do not need to be seeing this,” The Doctor said, quickly moving to the other bio-beds to look after the Captain, Tal Celes, and Angelo Tassoni. “Are any of the holodecks free?” Seven said. “Let’s find out,” Sam said.

---

Tal Celes was lying down in her quarters, her sheets pulled over her head. She was late for a shift, but didn’t care. She heard the door open, but didn’t bother to look. “Go away,” she groaned. “Not yet,” Captain Janeway’s voice replied. Celes sat upright so fast she nearly got dizzy. “Captain! I, I didn’t-” “If you’re going to make excuses for being late to your shift, don’t bother. I told Commander Chakotay to give you a pass. This time. I just wanted to come down and apologize to you in person since I didn’t get the chance in sickbay.” “Apologize? For what?” Celes said, feeling confused. “You made a judgment call when that dark matter alien was manipulating the environmental controls. I’m still not certain whether it was hostile or just confused, but that didn’t give me the right to yell at you the way I did. You acted in defense of your crew. That’s something to be proud of, Crewman.” “I killed something. Whatever it was. I’ve never taken a life before. Not even when I was still on Bajor. My family kept me hidden, and by the time I was old enough for them to finally let me fight, the Occupation was over. How can I live with myself? How do you do it, Captain? You’ve had to kill before, to defend the ship.” “Yes, yes, I have. You’re probably wondering how I’m able to sleep at night after I’ve done so,” Janeway said, sitting on the edge of Celes’s bed. “I didn’t mean-” “It’s a fair question. I just wish I had the answer I think you’re hoping for. Fact is, some nights, I can’t. It gets easier with time, certainly. And how much they hurt us before I hurt them factors into it, I won’t pretend it doesn’t. Killing someone who’s trying to kill you, it feels good, in the moment. But that moment never lasts. That’s a good thing though. If it ever does become easy for you, that’s when you have a problem.” Janeway got up. “Be glad you feel remorseful, Crewman Tal. It means you’re still one of the good guys. Take the day off, but I expect to see you in astrometrics for your regular shift tomorrow.” “Yes, Captain,” Celes said.

#a fire of devotion #Part 3 #chapter ten #sam7 #star trek voyager #fan fic

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summahsunlight · 4 years

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This Way Became My Journey, CH. 15

Two weeks after Voyager is taken from the Alpha Quadrant...

Tom Paris stumbled on his way out of the holodeck thanks to a horribly placed vending cart in Rome circa 1920. Things hadn't gone according to plan, hell they never seemed to go according to plan for him. Perhaps he should have told Harry the truth from the beginning, but Harry wouldn't have ventured down to the holodeck if he had told him the truth. So he had told a little white lie, what was the harm in that?

Apparently a lot because Harry was stalking off down the corridor to the turbolift. "Harry, wait up!"

Harry Kim shook his head. "No way, Tom. "

"Aw, come on Harry, I've been smoothing out the details for this date for days now! You can't leave me in the dust like this!"

"Oh yes I can," Harry snapped, pressing the button to call for the lift.

Tom caught up with him as the lift opened and pressed the button to send it on its way before Harry could step inside. His friend turned to glare at him. "It's the Delaney sisters, Harry, they come as a package. It's a double date or no date, Harry."

"I never agreed to a date of any kind."

"Sure you did," Tom replied. "Last night."

A blank expression passed over Harry's face. He couldn't recall ever have such a conversation. Of course, he was so tired last night he probably would have agreed to jumping out of an airlock. "I never agreed to any date last night. We ate dinner with Lieutenant Barrett, who told me to enjoy some recreational time while she was away to quell my homesickness. There was never anything about a date in that conversation Tom."

Tom grinned mercelessly. "Well, dates are recreational. You're following counselor's orders."

"She didn't order me. She suggested recreational activities," Harry fumed. "Why am I arguing with you on this? I have a girlfriend back home, I don't need to go on any dates."

"Harry, Harry, Harry, you honestly think she's going to wait for you?"

"Yes!" He exclaimed quickly.

"That's rather selfish of you, don't you think?"

"Look who's telling me about being selfish," Harry hissed. "It was rather selfish of you to think I'd go on this date so you can get with Meghan Delaney."

Tom shrugged his shoulders. "Alright, it was rather selfish of me, but you are my best friend Harry, who else would I ask to go on a double date with me?" He looked innocently at his friend. Harry rolled his eyes doing his best imitation of Sarah Barrett when Tom got this way. "Can I help it if I thought I was helping my best friend out?"

Harry grunted. "Helping me out with what?"

"Moving on!"

"Tom, we've only been out here two weeks, you think Libby's moved on that quickly?"

"Well of course not," Tom retorted, "but she's going to, eventually, Harry. You know it."

He did know it but he didn't want to acknowledge it. He wasn't ready to accept that Libby was going to move on without him, that she was going to think that he was dead. It seemed rather unfair to be so far away from home and going out on a double date with Tom when Libby was probably grieving for his loss back on Earth. Why should he be happy when he knew that his loved ones were not? Tom on the other hand didn't have this dilemma. He could care less about his family and had no girlfriend back home. Girlfriends just weren't Tom Paris' style. Harry wondered how long the chase of the Delaney sister's was going to last. He opened his mouth to speak, but no word came out.

Tom grabbed him by the arm. "Now come on, they're waiting for us and I only have forty five minutes left of holodeck time saved up."

Harry allowed Tom to pull him all the way back to holodeck, the whole time awestruck that he had every intent on not going back there but Paris found some way to drag him along. Every time, he thought as they entered the holodeck, he gets me every time with the moving on and selfish of me to think she'll wait bit. But even as he was dragged towards the candlelit table, with a very smiling Jenny Delaney, he wondered just how much trouble Tom had really gotten him into. It's going to be a long night.

The constant thrumming of the engines was soothing to him as the tiny shuttlecraft cruised along to the home world of the Karvaians. Voyager had made first contact with one of their scout ships two days before and the Captain wanted to immediately send out a diplomatic party to speak with them. The first officer had been given the mission, taken a shuttle, and departed from Voyager. Chakotay had always found that piloting a ship manually was a good source of therapy and relaxation, better than sitting in a chair and talking to a psychologist for hours on end. Maybe that was why he was having trouble getting to know Sarah Barrett.

It wasn't that he didn't like her; she was a bright young woman with a strong personality. However, she was a psychologist and whenever he opened his mouth to speak he wondered if she was taking silent notes about his mental state. It was this reason, that he was uncomfortable around her, that he believed Captain Janeway had sent them on the mission together. She was hoping that the time alone would help them work up a little bit of a rapport aside from the first officer/counselor relationship. Well, it was proving to be hard to do just that since Barrett was barely speaking to him. She had helped him with preflight and everything else that Starfleet protocol demanded of her, but once they were well on their way she had barricaded her self so to speak in the aft cabin of the shuttle, reading over PADDs.

Her eyes were narrowed, reading over the material vigorously, as if she felt that she didn't have enough time to read through it all. He recalled her concern for Neelix not being allowed on this mission, but Janeway had not felt comfortable allowing the Talaxian on another away mission just yet, not after what had happened on Ocampa with Neelix deceiving them to help rescue Kes. So, instead, Sarah had been handed stacks of PADDs on the data that Neelix had on the Karvaians right before they left.

He had been trying to get her to talk about what she was working on, to break the ice, but she had responded coldly that once she had a better grasp on Karvarian culture she would let him know, and the discussion had ended there.

But despite the lack of communication on this trip, he could see why Janeway liked the young woman so much. She could switch from hard and calculating, to soft and caring when the situation presented itself. And, he admitted, she had a wry sense of humor. But other than her personality, he didn't know much about her, except what her service record had indicated, and even then that didn't go into depth. He did know that she had a dark past, one that she was trying to turn her life around from. Like so many other people on this journey, he thought with sudden realization, as he made a course correction.

He had also tried asking her about her time at the Academy, perhaps make a connection between the two of them there. She had remarked, perhaps another time.

Looking at his panel he concluded that had been over two hours ago, just after they had cleared Voyager and been on their way to Karva. They would be reaching the planet in about thirty minutes. "Captain Janeway tells me you were a part of a team that studied the Borg," he spoke up, hoping to get something from her. It seemed that if they didn't have the integration of the Maquis into Voyager's crew to talk about, then they had nothing to talk about. And he didn't know why, but that bothered him.

"I was the head psychologist on a research vessel that composed of some of Starfleet's top engineers, science officers, and doctors," came her subdued reply. "Our mission was to collect as much information about the Borg as we could, such as their psyche and their technology and bring it back to Starfleet in the hopes that a better defense against the Borg could be made and spare us from another disaster like Wolf 359."

"Really? What made you want to study the Borg?" Chakotay asked her, brown eyes peering up for only a few seconds. "They aren't exactly the warmest species in the galaxy to be hanging around with."

"My mother was killed at Wolf 359," Barrett replied, a bit of pain etched in her voice. "I guess I wanted to justify the reason they had killed her."

Her answer had deadpanned the conversation, just when he felt like he was getting somewhere with her. The console blared suddenly and the ship lurched to the left. Perplexed, Chakotay corrected their course thinking that they had run into some form of spatial distortion; another blare and an even more violent lurch.

"A ship just appeared off of our port nacelle. They're firing on us," Barrett announced. She had jumped up from her seat in the aft cabin and into the one besides Chakotay. Her fingers were running over the console. "I don't understand why sensors didn't pick them up coming in!"

"I've never seen this type of ship before, it's not Karvaian," Chakotay said. "I'm going to try out running them. Try hailing them on all frequencies."

"No response," Sarah replied as the shuttle was hit again, this time causing sparks to emit from the conduits.

The shuttle craft in reality was no match for the alien ship. The readings were showing them that they were up against a ship that had vast technological advances, superior to their own, but perhaps, if they could get in communications range of Karva, their new friends could assist them. But with the next hit, the port nacelle caught fire, sending the shuttle into a downward spiral. Chakotay tried to right the shuttle with the only engine he had, as smoke filled the cabin. Barrett was screaming that the aliens were trying to take out their engines, causing the hull to breach around the nacelle, in affect, ripping it off the tiny ship. They were hurtling towards the surface of a small planetoid.

"Can we land?" Chakotay asked her.

"Land?" Barrett repeated. "We're going to crash before we do that!"

"Is the atmosphere compatible for us?"

"It's a Class L atmosphere," Barrett replied, sapphire eyes roaming the readings the computer was giving her. "The surface consists mostly of mountains and rock, not a lot of water; high concentrations of carbon dioxide. Can we survive down there? Yes, but that's only if we survive the crash first."

Chakotay shook his head, looking at the controls determinedly. "We're not going to crash."

Sarah looked up him skeptically. "How can you say that?" Her body lurched about violently as the tiny ship entered the atmosphere. "We only have one engine and those aliens are doing everything they can to take the other one out! Commander, if we hit the rock at this speed it will tear the ship apart and us with it!"

"Not if I can help it!"

"Commander! Even if we survive the crash or landing as you put it, we don't know if those aliens will come after us," Barrett pointed out. They had only been in this part of space for a couple of weeks, but already they had learned that most of the species in this quadrant weren't friendly, the Kazon, for example, were not to be trifled with and they hadn't gotten off on the best of terms with them.

"We're going to make it look like we've been destroyed. On my command I want you to vent the plasma," Chakotay instructed her, eyes running over his console, trying to find a good place to put the shuttle down. They were coming in fast towards a very rocky region. It was not going to be a smooth landing. "Hang on!" he cried out as the aliens fired across their bow. Sparks emitted from the aft cabin and he could see Barrett gripping the console, however she held a calm expression. No doubt it was something that she had learned while studying the Borg. Who knew that experience was going to come in handy now?

"Chakotay, we're going in too fast," the Counselor rasped out, anxiously.

"Unidentified ship, surrender."

Chakotay slapped at the comline. He didn't want to hear them implore surrender. They weren't out of tricks just yet. If they were lucky the alien ship wouldn't follow them into the atmosphere. The shuttle began to quake violently as it entered the upper atmosphere. "Vent the plasma, Sarah, and target phasers on it. Fire when I tell you too."

"But that would ignite the plasma," Sarah said, even as she followed through with his orders.

"I know, I want them to believe that we've burnt up in the atmosphere."

"I hope you know what you're doing," Sarah replied.

Me too, Chakotay thought as the shuttle hurtled faster and faster towards the surface. "Fire now!"

Phasers burst forth from the shuttle craft, igniting the plasma into a fireball behind them. The alien ship backed off, whether or not they believed that the shuttle had indeed exploded and were avoiding exploding themselves, the two officers couldn't be sure. They had other problems. Chakotay noticed on his fading sensors that the alien ship was reversing course. For the time being the threat had been eliminated, but now they were spiraling out of control towards a rocky planet. "Dispatch an automated distress signal to Voyager!"

Sarah moved about so she could record a message and send it to Voyager. It was brief, seeing how they didn't have much time before the ship hit the surface, but she hoped that it was effective. Turning back towards the Commander she only had a few moments to grip the console as he cried out to brace for impact.

Despite Chakotay's best efforts, and even though he managed to slow the ship's descent, the shuttle hit the rocky soil hard and both officers felt their bodies being thrown about against the panels and controls as the shuttle tore a path through the rock. It swayed back and forth, first the port nacelle was sheared off, and then the starboard nacelle came ripping off as well, exploding in a ball of flame that sent both Chakotay and Sarah flying from their seats as the shuttle slammed into a solid rock wall. In a blinding flash of light, both officers were knocked unconscious, the shuttle coming finally to a stop, crumpled against a mountain side.

He awoke with the taste of blood in his mouth and smoke in his eyes. Chakotay blinked, trying to take in his surroundings. The lights were flickering on and off, the consoles as well, and the memories began to return to his jostled mind. Rising up on to his elbows he peered out the view port. The shuttle was in shambles, but lucky for them, the shields had held long enough to protect them from the fires and explosions of the nacelles. Now, they were rested against a solid bed of rock. It hadn't been his best landing, but at least they had managed to get down in one piece.

They. He suddenly realized that he had no idea where Sarah was. Turning about, which sent a shooting pain up his right leg, he tried to locate her. She was a few feet from him, plasma burns covering a part of her face and hands. There was a huge gash across her cheek and she did not appear to be breathing. Grabbing the emergency medical kit he pulled out the tricorder and ran the hand scanner over her body. She was breathing and alive, but she had not faired as well as he had when it came to the crash landing.

She had several broken ribs, one had punctured a lung. The burns on her face and hands were second degree plasma burns that he could easily treat with a deremial regenerator, but that was the least of his concerns, she had suffered massive internal bleeding as well. If Voyager did not find them and find them soon, the young woman was going to die. Her eyes opened then and she looked at him, confused.

"We made it?"

"We made it," Chakotay replied, helping her sit up slightly. She winced in pain. "You were injured in the crash."

"How bad?" Sarah asked, trying to grit her teeth and bear the pain.

"Nothing too serious," he lied to her, reaching in the medical kit for a hypospray.

"You're a terrible liar; didn't they teach how to lie with the Maquis?"

He laughed, giving her a warm smile. "Should have known I couldn't fool you," he whispered, pressing the hypospray to her neck. "Here this will help with the pain. I'm afraid that's all I can do for now, besides treat your burns. You need surgery."

She nodded her head as the pain began to dull. "What about Voyager?"

Chakotay shook his head. "I'm not sure our message was received and I'm not sure I can send another one. It looks like our systems took heavy damage." He wiped some sweat from his brow and glanced around the cabin. He wasn't sure how they were going to get out of this one. Pulling himself up to his feet he moved towards the communication panel and saw that it was burnt out, probably where Sarah had received the burns from. So much for trying to send another message out to Voyager; he realized that even if he were able to get another message out, the aliens that had attacked them may pick the transmission up and come back to finish them off. Then they'd be in more trouble then they were now.

It was best to try and survive on this planet and wait for Voyager to find them. Glancing at Sarah he wondered how much time she could hold out. He wasn't a doctor, knew some basic first aid, but even he knew that she didn't have time on her side. One thing was for sure, they were going to need something to keep them warm and water. They had enough emergency rations to last them a few days, but a quick glance at the systems told him that the replicator was down and so weren't environmental controls. Once they lost the sunlight, it was going to get cold in that tiny shuttle. He grabbed a tricorder and a phaser. "I'm going to go look for water and something to start a fire with."

"You really think we'll be here that long?"

"There's no telling how long we'll be here," Chakotay responded, opening the hatch. Before he left he turned about and offered her a smile. "Don't go anywhere while I'm away."

A small, pain filled smile spread across her face. "Don't worry, Commander, I won't."

#star trek voyager #star trek voyager fanfiction #kathryn janeway #chakotay #tom paris #sarah barrett (oc)#tuvok #harry kim #b'elanna torres #kes #neelix #the doctor (emh)#janeway x chakotay #tom paris x ofc #this way became my journey

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summahsunlight · 4 years

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This Way Became My Journey, CH. 17

Harry Kim entered a subdued mess hall for lunch. The news that Commander Chakotay and Counselor Barrett's shuttle was missing had spread like wildfire throughout the ship. With a solemn glance around the room, Harry went to the replicators to replicate himself a sandwich for lunch. After the food had materialized he grabbed the tray and made his way through the sully crowd to a table in the corner that Tom Paris was occupying.

The young pilot, who had become Harry's friend in the last three weeks, was eating what looked like soup, and staring out the windows at the stars moving by. Harry set his tray down across from Tom and took his seat. "So much for the Karvaians being a morale booster," the young ensign mumbled. "The way people are acting around here, it's like we've already had a funeral for Commander Chakotay and Counselor Barrett."

Tom ran his tongue over his lips. "I didn't care for Chakotay too much; guess it was because he was right about me on a lot of things. However, I'm going to miss Sarah, she knew how to make me feel better and was easy to talk too. I feel bad for the Captain, having to replace her first officer, again, in a matter of weeks."

"You're one these people who make it sound like they're dead," Harry replied. "We don't know if they are."

"We don't know if their alive, either," Tom retorted, solemnly. He leaned forward. "Listen Harry, we have to be prepared for the worst here. It's not like we're home and replacements can be sent. We lose our first officer, we lose our first officer. And… no one else on this ship has the credentials to be counselor."

Harry took a bite of his sandwich. He thought back to the last time he had gone to speak to Barrett. It had been two days before her and Commander Chakotay were due to depart for Karva. He had been homesick; she had made him laugh with some ridiculous story about when she was a kid. Tom was right, she was easy to talk too and he was going to miss her. Her presence alone had been comforting, not too mention she was quite pretty; her smile alone could make anyone feel better. Realizing what he had just thought, he snapped back to attention. "Let's not think about replacements unless we have too, okay?"

"Sounds good to me," Tom said, pushing his tray away from him. "So, are we still on for Venice?"

Harry had completely forgotten, in all the excitement, that Tom had arranged for them to go on a double date with the Delaney sisters, yet again. Of course Harry had been against it from the start, seeing how he had a girlfriend back home, but Tom had forced him into that first date with them by guilt tripping him and now was setting up another. "I don't know, Tom. The last time didn't go over so well."

"The last time you were too preoccupied with your girlfriend back home. It wouldn't have hurt to have said a few words to Jenny," Tom said, with a smile. "Let your girlfriend go Harry. She deserves to have a life, be allowed to fall in love again. Besides, you really think she's going to wait seventy-five years for you?"

"We've had this discussion," Harry pointed out. "But… you're right, I do need to let go. She probably doesn't even know I'm alive."

"If it makes you feel any better, Harry, none of our families know if we're alive," Tom said. "We're all in the same boat."

Harry smiled sadly. "Counselor Barrett said the same thing to me."

"You've been seeing a lot of our resident psychologist," Tom said, smirking, meaning his gears were turning. "Perhaps it's her you want to take to Venice and not Jenny Delaney."

His friend frowned. "Knock it off Tom. Counselor Barrett is a nice person to talk too, I'd even consider her a friend, but that's it."

"For now anyways," Tom said, noticing Harry roll his eyes. "Oh come on, Harry. It's okay to admit you have a crush on her! She's pretty easy on the eyes."

"So why don't you ask her on a date?"

"I did," he said. "She turned me down, gave me some mumble jumble about us being too much alike that it would never work out. Not too mention she said I was a walking hormone."

Harry suppressed a chuckle, and grinned, "Is this why the sudden attention on Megan Delaney? You were rejected by one pretty brunette so now you're going after another?"

"Oh, so you do admit Sarah's pretty," Tom tried changing the subject. "You know, if she's still alive, and we end up finding them, you better make your move before some else does. I heard several crewmen have made a pass at her."

Harry didn't know why but that bothered him, a lot. Could Tom be right, that he did have a crush on Sarah Barrett? Harry finished his sandwich and pushed the tray away from him, glaring at Tom. "This is crazy, Tom. I shouldn't be jumping into a new relationship on the chance we're going to live the rest of our lives out here. Maybe, Chakotay and Sarah found a wormhole and are in the Alpha Quadrant right now, trying to find a way to get in contact with Voyager. If that's the case I could be sitting down to eat dinner with Libby tomorrow."

"Or, you could be stuck out here for seventy-five years, a lonely old hermit if you keep that attitude," Tom argued. "I think she'd understand if you went on with your life, especially if she goes on with hers."

"Senior officers report to the bridge."

The conversation about girlfriends, the Delaney sisters and Sarah Barrett ended, as the two officers got up from their table and went to recycle their trays. However, Harry couldn't shake the emotions that Tom had stirred up inside of him. I only have a crush on her because she's helping me cope with being away from home, that's it; nothing more. But uncertainty kept creeping into his brain as they stepped out of the turbo lift onto the bridge.

Captain Janeway was standing in the middle of the command station, hands on her hips, an alien ship on the view screen.

"They're hailing us Captain," Tuvok reported from tactical.

An image of a humanoid alien appeared on the screen, with skin in various shades of green with navy blue spots blotted down the temple all the way to the collarbone. He, or she, had yellow eyes, a slopping forehead, and did not look particular happy to be speaking to Voyager. "My name's Captain Kathryn Janeway of the Federation starship Voyager, what can we do for you?"

"You can turn your ship around and leave Rupor space," the alien responded, dryly.

"We mean you no harm," Janeway tried to assure the alien, "but maybe you could help us. I'm looking for two of my crewmen, who may have crossed through your space a day or so ago. Have your people reported any unidentified crafts passing through the vicinity?"

"No," the alien snapped. "Except you."

"Perhaps then, you'd be kind enough to allow us to search your space for them. We'd only be here about a day-."

The alien glowered. "No! You are to turn your ship around, there will be no compromise!" He disappeared from the screen and the bridge crew all looked around perplexed at one another. Tuvok reported that the tiny scout ship was in retreat.

Janeway glared at the blank screen, straightening her uniform. "Tom, hold our position here," she ordered the young man. Tapping at her combadge she requested that Neelix join her in her ready room. And before anyone could ask her what she had in mind, the woman disappeared back into her private sanctuary and was gone.

"The woman is insane!" Neelix sputtered as he entered Kes' quarters after meeting for an hour with Kathryn Janeway in her ready room about the Rupor. "No one attempts to travel through Rupor space! No one!"

"But if Commander Chakotay and Counselor Barrett are in trouble, it maybe her only choice," Kes replied, softly, trying to use her tone of voice to sooth him and calm him down. She had to admit she knew very little about other species outside of her own and the Kazon, so she had to take what Neelix said seriously. "Wouldn't you want her to do the same for you?"

Neelix looked speechless for a moment, but then stuttered, "Well yes. But that's not the point, Kes. The Rupor are fanatical when it comes to outsiders entering their space. If the Commander and Counselor crossed into their space even for the slightest second, they would have pursued them, and quite possibly shot them down."

"But they didn't attack Voyager," Kes pointed out. "Maybe Commander Chakotay and Counselor Barrett's shuttle didn't pass through their space at all."

"They didn't fire on us because Voyager packs a bigger punch than a shuttle. A Rupor scout ship would never have fired on Voyager," Neelix replied. " Smaller crafts, that a different story. They offer for you to surrender and if you don't, they shoot you down. They gave Captain Janeway their warning and are no doubt sending a warship to deal with us."

Kes got off her bed and went to place a hand on his shoulder. "Neelix we just have to trust the Captain's judgment."

"I know," he grumbled. "But sometimes that woman is more trouble than she's worth."

Kes rubbed his shoulder and smiled. "Would you rather be stuck trying to make a living in a debris field?"

"No," he answered. "I guess the fact that she has allowed us to journey with them is a redeeming quality. But if we survive traveling through Rupor space, we'll be lucky." The ship lurched suddenly with weapon's fire and red alert was immediately activated. "It seems that the Rupor have already showed their displeasure in our presence here," Neelix told her. "I wouldn't be surprised if this ship is destroyed within the hour."

"Return fire!" Kathryn Janeway bellowed from her command chair, as conduits and consoles sparked around her. "Mister Paris, evasive maneuvers."

She had expected to be confronted by the Rupor, since she was after all ignoring their request not to travel in their space, and from what Neelix had told her, they were not friendly to outsiders. But they had traced Chakotay and Sarah's ion trail this far and she was not about to give up searching for them. What she had not expected was the ferocity and quickness of the Rupor attack.

"Shields are down to seventy-three percent," Tuvok reported.

"I'm detecting hull breaches on decks four and five, repair teams are on them," Kim said through the shaking of the ship under constant bombardment.

Janeway ran a hand over her face and then with a determined stare, stood up. "Tuvok, target their weapon's array, and fire two photon torpedoes."

"Aye, Captain."

She watched on the view screen as the torpedoes made their way through space and hit the alien vessel square on. She held her breath for a moment, praying that they had disabled their ship. And then, let it out as Tuvok reported that they had indeed taken the alien's weapons off line. "Mister Paris, get us out of here, warp seven, following the shuttle's ion trail. I have a feeling that the Rupor are going to be back and they're going to come with reinforcements."

"Yes ma'am, setting course zero one five mark nine, warp seven," Paris echoed, fingers running over the conn.

"Engage."

"Captain," Neelix's voice said, not to Janeway's surprise. "Can I have a word with you?"

Janeway kicked a piece of debris away from the command station. "I'm a little busy right now, Neelix." With an audible sigh, she turned to face her Talaxian guide. "I have repairs to make, officers to find, and aliens to keep from tearing my ship apart. But…I suppose I could squeeze you in."

"It's just that, the Rupor, they'll come back," Neelix said.

"I figured as much."

"No you don't understand," Neelix rasped. "They were just testing your capabilities. Now that they see you can disable one of their ships, they'll come back with even more and won't stop pursuing you until you're either out of their space or destroyed."

"I'm not leaving my people behind, Mister Neelix," Janeway snapped, eyes narrowing on him.

"Your people are most likely dead," Neelix retorted. "They wouldn't have given that tiny shuttle the chances they are giving your starship. Chances are a scout ship has blasted them out of the sky."

"Captain," Kim's voice said, strained, from ops. "I've traced the ion trail to a Class L planetoid, three light years from here. I'm also picking up traces of ignited plasma in the planet's atmosphere and some debris." He put the image on screen and immediately the bridge crew could see that it was part of a nacelle.

Janeway felt bile rising in her throat. "What about weapon's residue?"

"I'm picking up two signatures, one is Federation, the other Rupor," Tuvok answered, stoically.

Bastards, Janeway thought, angrily. "Any sign of the shuttle?"

"Negative, Captain."

The news wasn't about to stop her though. "Maintain course, Mister Paris. I'm not about to give them up for dead, not yet. The Rupor can go to hell for all I care."

"Captain, I'm picking up an automated distress call," Kim said. "It's on a Starfleet emergency signal. It's badly damaged, it's going to take a couple of minutes to clean it up."

"Do it, Mister Kim."

A few moments later he had cleaned it up as best he could. The message was distorted and faint, but Sarah Barrett's voice came through loud and clear to everyone on that bridge. "Voyager, we're under attack, repeat we're under attack. We had to land on an L Class planetoid. We need assistance. Our systems are heavily damaged, again we are in need of assistance." The message ended and Janeway felt her heart sink lower into her chest.

"Mister Paris how long until we reach the planetoid?"

"At our current speed, I would estimate forty minutes ma'am," Paris reported.

"Captain," Tuvok said, "long range sensors have picked up a Rupor fleet moving in to intercept us. I estimate that they will do so in forty-five minutes."

"Well that doesn't leave us much time then," Janeway said.

"Time to do what?" Neelix asked.

"Get to the planet, get our people, and get the hell out of Rupor space."

"Rise and shine, Lieutenant," Chakotay's voice stirred her from a light slumber. "We've survived our first night."

Sarah Barrett opened her eyes to see Chakotay standing over her, holding a medical tricorder in his hand and running the hand scanner over her body. "Anything from Voyager yet?" she asked, noticing a burning sensation in her lungs. That can't be good, she thought, arching her back slightly, trying to find a comfortable position. The movement only made her lungs burn more.

"Not yet, but I'm sure they're on their way," Chakotay answered her with a shake of his head. He put the tricorder away and looked at her grimly. "I'm afraid your injured lung is filing with fluid, you've contracted an infection. I've given you something to stall its progress, but until we can get you the proper medical treatment, I'm afraid that your lung will continue to fill and the infection will spread."

"It's okay," she said, trying to sound positive. "Voyager will find us soon. Captain Janeway won't rest until she does."

That much he knew, he had seen her loyalty to members of her crew while spending five days with the woman trying to locate Harry Kim and B'Elanna Torres after they had been abducted by the Caretaker. The thought of Janeway's loyalty comforted him. "Are you hungry?" he asked the counselor. "We've got fresh ration bars for breakfast this morning."

"Sounds delicious," she replied, sarcastically as he handed her a ration bar. "But I guess it's better than nothing." She munched on the ration bar for a few seconds, watching as he carefully lowered his body back down onto the floor of the shuttle and gazed out of the open hatch. "At least the view is nice."

Chakotay nodded his head, resting his hands on his knees. He had watched the sunrise over the mountains that morning, half hoping to see Voyager in the distance, swooping into a low orbit to search for them. However, he couldn't be sure that Captain Janeway knew that they were in trouble or missing from the diplomatic mission on Karva. Letting out a frustrated breath of air, he nudged the stones he had warmed the night before with phaser fire, long ago burnt out.

"Something on your mind, Commander?"

He looked at her, dark eyes studying her face. "Yesterday, when we talked, you told me about your father, the pressure to live up to his Starfleet standards, what about your mother? You only spoke of her that one time, in the shuttle before it crashed, that she was killed at Wolf 359."

Sarah fidgeted nervously. "Well, my mother and I weren't particularly close. I mean, yes I grieved for her after her death, but it didn't devastate me like losing my father did. What about yours?"

"Still alive, but always trying to talk me out the Federation and then the Maquis," he replied, with a small smile.

"My parents couldn't push into the Academy fast enough," Sarah said. "Especially when my brother decided against a career in Starfleet, the pressure to be their little Starfleet darling was even greater."

"You're brother must be worried about you now, with Voyager missing," Chakotay ventured.

She scoffed. "Luke? No way, after my father died he ripped me apart for not being there for the funeral, that Starfleet was the reason our parents were both dead at young ages and that I was only going to end up like them if I didn't leave. Of course I couldn't just up and leave, I had my work on the Borg to complete and Starfleet had already asked me to infiltrate a growing group of terrorists who were calling themselves the Maquis."

He chuckled, "We could have known each other sooner."

"Well, no, I never went on that mission," she replied softly. "After Luke basically told me that everything in Starfleet disgusted him, including me, I ran into some narcotics dealer on some deep space station, and thus began my battle with drugs. He pushed away further from me when he learned I had been arrested and was being court martial. I haven't talked to him, well, it's been almost two years now."

"He never came to visit you in rehab?"

"I never told him I was in rehab. As far as he's concerned I'm serving my time at Auckland."

"He must know by now you aren't at Auckland. I'm sure Starfleet would have informed friends and family that Voyager had disappeared," Chakotay mused.

Sarah shrugged her shoulders. "I'm not sure it would change a thing. He always told me that Starfleet was going to kill me one day." She laughed then, looking down at her blanket covered legs. "I guess he was right, look at me now; hanging on to dear life on some barren planet in uncharted space."

He gave her hand a reassuring pat. "You said yourself that Captain Janeway won't rest until she finds us."

"Yeah, you're right I did," she said. "What about you Commander, if the situation were reversed and you were in command, looking for the captain, would you not rest until you'd found her?"

It was an odd question, but one he knew she had to ask, to see where his loyalty lay. "Three weeks ago if you had asked me that question, I would have said, no, because the thought of joining Starfleet again was the furtherest thought from my mind, let alone being forced to serve on a Federation vessel. But, today, after all that has happened in the past three weeks, the Kazon, the Caretaker, quantum singularities; yes, I wouldn't rest until I was certain of her demise or otherwise found her."

"Even though she's Starfleet, through and through?"

"She maybe Starfleet, but she's my captain now," Chakotay answered her, tensely. "Have I given you any reason to doubt that?"

Sarah shook her head, the lose pieces of coffee hair falling in her eyes. "No," she whispered. "I'm sorry, Commander. I shouldn't be questioning you like this."

Chakotay felt immediate remorse. "No, I should be the one apologizing. I suppose my loyalty being questioned is still a sore spot, probably will be for a while." He saw her wince in pain, as she tried shifting about to get in a more comfortable position. He reached for a hypospray. "Speaking of sore spots, here's something for the pain again." Pressing the hypospray to the fleshy part of her neck, he asked, "How are you holding up?"

Sarah fell back on the makeshift pillow he had created for her using his uniform tunic and an extra blanket. "I've felt better, that's for sure."

Chakotay stood, getting her a glass of water and noticing that their supply was going down. "Here, take this. I'm going to go get some more snow so we can melt it down again."

"Keep an open comline like usual?" she guessed, drinking the water.

He grinned at her. "Of course, there's still so much that I want to learn about Sarah Barrett."

"Oh, but we were just getting to the fun part; learning all of your dark secrets," she snapped back playfully.

He laughed, gathered up the storage containers and once again trudged out into the rocky terrain to find their only source of water, snow in the higher elevations.

Usually she spent lunchtime with the children, but duty called that mid afternoon. Instead, Kathryn Janeway replicated a pot of coffee and some finger sandwiches to nibble on while Voyager cruised closer to the planet they believed Chakotay and Sarah's shuttle had landed on. Since they first traced the shuttle to the planetoid and found debris and weapon's residue on long range sensors, Kathryn had felt a feeling of dread in the pit of her stomach. Neelix had mentioned the Rupor were relentless when it came to outsiders in their space.

Voyager had already had one brush with them and she was sure that the ship would not be able to withstand another attack. They might have been able to disable the warship that had come to greet them, but Voyager had sustained heavy damage as well, seeing how many of her systems had been under going repairs in the first place. Voyager would not survive another attack by the Rupor. She was faced with a frightening choice; if the Rupor attacked again before they reached the planet, for there were no guarantees that the fleet Tuvok had picked up would be the first to intercept them, she would have to either turn the ship around and retreat into friendly space, leaving behind Chakotay and Sarah to die; or she would have to press onward to save her people, thus writing all of their death sentences.

There was no easy answer and she wished that her counselor was there to help her sort through the fog.

Kathryn leaned forward to pick up a finger sandwich off the plate, which was resting on her round coffee table. As she did so she felt something cold brush against her neck and she instinctively reached underneath her undershirt and pulled out a gold chain. On the end was her engagement ring, a simple gold band with a sparkling aquamarine gem in the middle. Welded to the engagement ring was her wedding band. She had taken the rings off her finger when she had gone back to active duty, after Ava's birth. Even though her marriage had ended, by the tragic death of her husband, she was not ready to part with the rings yet, so she had purchased a gold chain at some starbase, and thus started wearing them around her neck, hidden underneath her uniform. Running her fingers over the cool metal she felt tears press her eyes. I'm in over my head, Bryan. I wish you were here to give me the answers that I'm seeking.

She could almost hear his soft voice telling her that she would figure it out, his gray eyes smiling at her, how his arms had felt so sheltering when she felt out of control. She hated being out of control, hated having control taking away from her, like it was now with the Rupor breathing down her neck. Bryan I can't do this, I just can't.

But you can, Kathryn, you can, she could hear him speaking in her head, or at least what she imagined he would say to her. Bryan had often told her that he had never met a stronger woman than her; it was one of the things he loved about her, her resolve. It was the first thing he had said to her when he proposed to her.

Suddenly she was overtaken with emotion and shoved the necklace back underneath her tunic, trying desperately to fight her tears. I will not cry, I cannot cry, not now, not when I have crewmen to rescue.

Voyager shook with weapons fire and red alert came on. Tuvok's voice could be heard over the comlink, "Captain Janeway report to the bridge."

Burying all the emotions deep down inside of her, Kathryn stepped out onto the bridge, asking Tuvok for a report. The Vulcan brought his dark eyes up to hers and she could see them flicker to the view screen. Following his gaze, as he rattled off his report that Rupor warships had come in undetected by their sensors and proceeded to open fire on them, she could see three large warships, sleek in design and packing a deadly punch.

"We barely had enough time to raise our shields, Captain," Tuvok said, finishing his report.

"Hail them," Janeway ordered, still hoping for a diplomatic solution. Tuvok told her the channel was open. "This is Captain Janeway, we mean you no harm, we're simply trying to find our people."

"They are not responding, Captain," Tuvok reported.

"Return fire!"

"Firing phasers," Tuvok said. "They had no effect Captain."

Voyager groaned with another hit, and Janeway had to grip the railing near tactical to stay on her feet. Someone was yelling that their hull was losing integrity and then Paris was yelling that they were losing warp drive.

Janeway felt like the walls of the bridge were closing in around her as the Rupor continued to fire. Consoles were exploding, their shields were failing, and causalities were being reported all over the ship. If she stayed in Rupor space she risked losing more than just Chakotay and Sarah, she risked losing her entire crew, her children. Swallowing the bile that had risen in her throat, she turned to Paris. "Do we have enough power to the warp drive to get us out of here, Mister Paris?"

"Yes ma'am," Paris answered, blue eyes studying her face.

"Set a course out of Rupor space, maximum warp," Janeway instructed a tone of dread in her voice.

"Aye, captain."

Janeway felt the ship lurch with the new course, the walls seemingly getting smaller and smaller the further they moved away from the space that Chakotay and Sarah were trapped in. I've abandoned them, she thought miserably. No captain should abandon her crew, should not leave them behind. I'll be damned if these aliens bully me into leaving my people to die.

"The Rupor are not pursuing, Captain," Kim said, and then in a soft voice asked, "Does this mean we're giving up the rescue attempt?"

The Captain spun on her heel, tears threatening to escape her eyes, and Kim could see the fire smoldering in them. "No Ensign, they may have us back on our heels, but I refuse to give up trying to rescue Commander Chakotay and Lieutenant Barrett. Contact the Karvaian Prime Minister, maybe they can help us."

#star trek voyager #star trek voyager fanfiction #kathryn janeway #chakotay #tom paris #sarah barrett (oc)#harry kim #tuvok #neelix #kes #the doctor (emh)#janeway x chakotay #tom paris x ofc #this way became my journey

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voyagerafod · 7 years

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Star Trek Voyager: A Fire of Devotion: Part 3 of 4: Sweeter Than Heaven: Chapter Two

Chapter Two

Although she’d been at several weddings in her life, Captain Janeway had never officiated over one before. She knew the routine fairly well, having heard the standard speech given by Captains before. She’d even heard Tom Paris’s father give the speech once, but now it was her time to do this, and she had to admit she was excited.

There was also a fear that she would somehow mess it up, but it was a small fear, easily pushed aside until the ceremony was over and she could breathe a sigh of relief that nothing went wrong for Samantha Wildman and Seven of Nine.

What she couldn’t help but find bizarre about the situation though was where the ceremony was to be held. She’d assumed it would take place in the mess hall, since that’s where such events were usually held on a starship, even if Voyager’s mess hall was actually a post-launch addition to the ship, converted by Neelix from what had been the Captain’s private dining room. Even getting married on the holodeck wasn’t unusual. But instead, the ceremony was to be held in front of the wall of Borg alcoves in cargo bay 2.

“That is where my journey began,” Seven had said earlier that day when she and Samantha had come to her ready room to tell her their plans. “That’s the room I was in when I first realized I was no longer a drone, when I started to become human.” When Janeway had suggested the mess hall, Samantha had chimed in with, “Hey, at least it’s not in the turbolift where we first met.”

Another unexpected choice was to have Marla Gilmore as a guest. Janeway knew of course that Gilmore had been the one to help Seven of Nine and Joe Carey escape their confinement, but she had had also been partially responsible for their capture in the first place. Perhaps Seven felt she owed Gilmore, despite that.

Janeway pushed those thoughts aside though once she reached cargo bay 2, making sure her dress uniform was as straight as possible as she stepped inside. Seven and Samantha were already there, both of them wearing their standard uniforms. Naomi was there, of course, talking to her mother. Marla Gilmore wore civilian clothing, as did Neelix who was standing guard over the cake Samantha had asked for as though he expected some armed men to come and try and take it. Harry Kim had his own dress uniform on and was talking to Gilmore and Seven.

“I’m not late am I?” the Captain said, smiling. Everyone stopped what they were doing and turned to face her. “Not at all Captain,” Samantha said. “In fact, I think you’re early.” “Good,” Janeway said. She’d actually known she wasn’t late, but didn’t feel like announcing her presence in any formal fashion. The dress uniform was formal enough for her as far as she was concerned.

Samantha and Seven, wearing their uniforms instead of anything more formal or traditional, shared a look. The later smiled and nodded at the former.

“Since everyone’s here,” Samantha said, “I suppose we could start early. Would that be alright Captain?” “Of course,” Janeway said. Seven got to work letting everyone know that the ceremony was about to start, and soon everyone was standing at attention, except for Seven and Sam who held each other’s hands, and Janeway who stood in front of both of them.

The music of the couple’s choice, selections from a ballet called Coppelia, began playing while Janeway began the standard captain’s wedding speech.

“Since the days of the first wooden sailing ships,” she said, “all captains have enjoyed the happy privilege of joining together two people in the bonds of matrimony.” “There is actually considerable disagreement amongst historians about that,” Seven said. Samantha laughed, as everyone else in the room tried not to. “Honey, let her finish,” she said, trying to stifle her giggling. “Sorry,” Seven said, looking genuinely apologetic. “That just sort of slipped out.” Janeway grinned and shook her head. “It’s probably just nerves, Seven, don’t worry about it. Anyway, as I was saying, it is my honour to unite you, Annika Hansen, and you, Samantha Wildman, together in matrimony.”

The rest of the speech continued on without any further pedantic interruptions. When it came time for the vows, Samantha went with the standards, ones based on western religious traditions on Earth that had over the centuries become increasingly secular and common amongst people from all backgrounds, even amongst non-humans. Seven, on the other hand, had prepared her own.

“Throughout the past few years, I have often had people comment on my bravery for one reason or another. But they are wrong, because when it came time to pursue the thing that would have the greatest effect on my life after leaving the Borg collective, I stayed silent. I had feelings for you, but out of fear of failure I kept it to myself. Even when others,” Seven glanced at Harry Kim, “could see it and told me to take the chance, I did nothing.

“I didn’t have the words for it at the time, but I thought you were too good for me. That you couldn't possibly love me, because you were human and I was Borg. In the end, you were the brave one. You always were, from the time you first saw me, still just a lost drone, my skin still pale, and still covered in Borg technology. You were among the first to be kind to me. And you were the first to come to me, to make me face my feelings, to get me to tell the truth, and that is a large part of why I love you so much, Sammy. You bring out the best in me.

“I will never take you for granted. You are the one that I want. I don't know if I'm worthy of you, even still. To me, you still seem better than I deserve when I spent eighteen years of my life causing so much pain, but I'm not going to let that bother me anymore. Because I can see it in your eyes when are together. When you say you love me, I know it’s true. I can hear it in your voice. Due to my own cowardice, I nearly lost that. It is through simple good fortune that I didn’t, and I won’t forget that.

“I love you, Samantha Wildman. I'm grateful you love me. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Thank you for being brave, for both of us. Thank you for choosing me.” Seven stopped. Janeway knew she was supposed to say something else now, but was distracted by her own tears. She noticed that everyone else in the cargo bay was crying as well. With the ceremony being shown on all shipboard channels she had to wonder if there was a non-Vulcan, non-hologram on Voyager that wasn’t. “Captain?” Samantha said. “Are you okay?” “Fine, sorry,” Janeway said. She searched her memory for the rest of what she needed to for the rest of the ceremony, and sped them as quickly as she could without stumbling over the words. She pronounced the couple as officially married under the power invested in her by Starfleet and the United Federation of Planets. Sam and Seven fell into each other’s arms, kissing passionately, while the small group around them applauded. Naomi ran up and threw her arms around both Sam and Seven. Janeway casually walked up to Harry Kim, and leaned in to talk to him quietly.

“I’m curious,” she said. “How is it you knew those two would end up together before even they did?” “Because it’s happened before,” Harry said. “And now it’s happening again.” “The Year of Hell?” Janeway said. Harry nodded. “Hmm. Maybe it is fate after all. Though obviously, Seven seems to think it better that she not see it that way, and I see no reason to discourage that line of thinking. I always thought it was kismet with Mark, and look how that ended up.”

Harry shrugged. “If there were a right answer for love captain, everyone who wanted it would have it. We do the best we can, and if it ends badly, it ends badly.” “That is oddly less cynical than it sounds, Harry,” Janeway said. “Anyway, I think it’s time to send the happy couple off on their honeymoon to the holodeck.” “No M-class planets nearby?” “None that aren’t populated by pre-warp cultures,” Janeway said.

---

As they walked down the corridor towards their quarters, hand in hand, Seven of Nine and Samantha Wildman would nod politely at any crewmember they came across who congratulated them, but their focus was on each other. When she saw no one nearby, Samantha stopped walking for a moment. “Annie,” she said, “I just want to thank you again, for what you said during the wedding. That was so beautiful.” “Thank you,” Seven said. “I meant every word of it.” “I know you did. I just feel both flattered and confused that you’d see me as the brave one of us. I don’t know if I could’ve faced some of things you have and come out the other side sane. Hell, that whole thing with the Equinox nearly broke me.”

“There’s more to bravery than simply keeping a cool head in a crisis, Sam,” Seven said. “But enough about that. I’ve finally figured where we can go on our honeymoon.” “Holodeck 1 or Holodeck 2?” Sam said with a wink. “Ha ha,” Seven said in a deadpan tone of voice. “I mean I believe I have chosen a program you will find satisfactory. I was researching the origins of my surname given at birth out of curiosity some time ago, and traced it an area of Earth called Scandinavia.” Samantha’s jaw dropped. “Oh that is perfect, we could go skiing! I haven’t been skiing since my academy days.” “Saunas are also a distinct possibility,” Seven of Nine added with a smile. “I love you,” Sam said. “I know,” Seven said.

---

“And with that, Lieutenant Torres,” the Doctor said, closing his medical tricorder, “you are finally clear for duty.” “I can’t help but feel like you took as long as you did to clear me to punish me,” B’Elanna said. “Punish you for what exactly? I mean besides the self-induced near death experience that both the captain and I warned you against of course?”

B’Elanna groaned. “Nobody likes a smart-ass Doc.” “Well, then why am I dating you?” Tom Paris said, smiling. B’Elanna just rolled her eyes and shook her head. My boyfriend the comedian, she thought. “So,” the Doctor continued speaking after putting his medical instruments away. “did either of you happen to catch the broadcast of the ceremony this afternoon?” “I slept through it, actually,” B’Elanna said. “I heard it, and frankly I’m not amused,” Tom said. “What do you mean?” the Doctor said. “Good question,” B’Elanna added, crossing her arms. “Seven’s speech,” Tom said. “Sets the bar pretty high for anyone else on this ship who might wanna get married before we get back to the Alpha Quadrant. I don’t know how anybody could top that.” “It was certainly lovely,” the Doctor said, “but I honestly think you’re overstating things. What made what Seven said to Ensign Wildman so beautiful was its sincerity. As long as no one tries to go out of their way to just one up Seven of Nine, I’m sure anything said at any future Voyager weddings will be just as romantic and poignant.” Well put, B’Elanna thought. “Good point,” Tom said aloud. “I suppose I’ll have to watch the recording of it after my shift,” B’Elanna said. “But for now, it’s back to engineering.”

“I’ll be on the bridge,” Tom said. He put his arm around B’Elanna’s shoulder and the two left sickbay together.

“Was it really that good?” B’Elanna said. “Whatever it was Seven said to Sam at the wedding I mean?”

Tom looked around, as if make extra certain no other crewmembers were within earshot. “Just between you, me, and the bulkhead? I cried.” “Damn, sounds like it was good,” B’Elanna said, genuinely surprised at Tom’s admission.

---

Marla Gilmore stared at herself in the mirror of the quarters she was forced to share with two of the other Equinox survivors. There were enough crew quarters for each of them to have their own of course, but a loss of that kind of privacy had been just one part of the punishment she and the others had been given by the Captain.

She didn’t complain though. Noah and Angelo were almost never here at the same time she was, the former being trained to work in Voyager’s astrometrics lab, the latter having been assigned to security division under Lieutenant Ayala’s supervision. As for her, she took one last look at her pip-less uniform, clean and pressed, in the mirror before heading to her shift in engineering, working under the Vulcan engineer, Ensign Vorik. I just hope someday I feel like I deserve to be wearing it again, she thought.

She headed to engineering, and when she got there she was once again struck by how quiet the place was at this time of ‘night.’ That could change at a moment’s notice if a crisis occurred, but as part of the night shift she wouldn’t have to carry much if any of the burden. As the old academy joke went, “night shift just means you watch the monitors for eight hours unless something comes up, then you go wake up Mom & Dad,” meaning the Captain and the First Officer.

She didn’t mind though. The last time she had been in charge of engineering, she’d followed an order that had led to so much suffering she honestly didn’t care that she was so far down the chain of command that the operation officer would be called down here to run things before she’d ever have to be in charge again.

“Miss Gilmore,” Vorik said in his usual formal tone. “Hello Vorik,” she said. “What’s the schedule for tonight?” “A routine cleaning of plasma injector ports,” he said. “Sounds good to me,” Marla said. Vorik raised an eyebrow, as he always did whenever Marla expressed enthusiasm for tasks that were normally considered boring by the rest of the engineering staff, but unlike the first time she’d done it over a week ago, he didn’t comment.

Such tasks were boring of course, but necessary to keep a ship running smoothly. She also knew that she could actually take the time necessary to do them properly, a luxury she hadn’t had on the Equinox for years. When she could do repairs, they were always rushed. More than once she’d had to bypass procedures in a fashion that would make a Federation safety officer’s head explode.

---

Brian Sofin, as well as Angelo Tassoni, being the sole surviving security officers of the Equinox, had been added to Voyager’s security team under the constant supervision of either Lieutenant Ayala or Lieutenant Anderson, depending on the day.

Unlike the regular officers though, they were not allowed to have phasers just yet, and mainly only took part in drills.

As far as Sofin was concerned, they were getting off light. It still amazed him that there were any people on Voyager at all who were polite to him. The majority were clearly uncomfortable, likely afraid of being betrayed again, but while no one had explicitly forgiven him, or anyone else from the Equinox as far as he knew, but others had expressed a degree of sympathy. He did not feel he deserved it.

When he entered the mess hall, dimly lit as per usual during a ship’s night cycle, the only sentient there was the Talaxian, Neelix, who was putting utensils away. “Oh, hello,” Neelix said, and Sofin nodded back politely. “Mister Neelix,” he said. “I apologize if I interrupted anything.”

“Not at all,” Neelix said. “Is there anything I can get you before I close up for the night?”

“No,” Sofin said. “I just needed a quiet place to do my daily report for Lieutenant Commander Tuvok. I’m afraid that Noah snores.” “I can recommend an old Talaxian remedy for that,” Neelix said. “Did wonders for me when I had that problem. At least according to Kes anyway, assuming she wasn’t just trying to spare my feelings.”

“Kes?” Sofin said. “My ex-girlfriend,” Neelix said. “She came aboard Voyager with me six years ago.” “What happened to her?” “That’s a much more complicated story,” Neelix said. “But one I’d be happy to share with you when I’m not headed for bed.” “I don’t get it,” Sofin said. “What?” Neelix said. “How you can be so kind to me after-”

“You were in a difficult situation and made some bad choices,” Neelix said. “I hate to break it to you, Mister, um, I’m sorry I didn’t catch your name when you came aboard.”

“Sofin. Brian Sofin.”

“Brian. Got it. Anyway, Brian, there’s hardly a sentient alive without some kind of regrets. You did something bad, sure. But punishment is not my purview, it’s the Captain’s. And my empathy was, last time I looked, not on the list of things the Equinox survivors are not allowed to have while they’re on Voyager.”

“I guess not,” Sofin said.

“So, as I said, if you’re free during the day tomorrow, swing by and I’ll tell you all about Kes and what she meant, not just to me, but to the rest of this crew. It’s a great story,” Neelix said, smiling. Sofin, reluctantly, smiled back. “I bet it is.”

#a fire of devotion #part 3 #chapter two #fan fiction #star trek voyager #sam7

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voyagerafod · 7 years

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Star Trek Voyager: A Fire of Devotion: Part 2 of 4: Louder Than Bells: Chapter Four

Chapter Four:

After a month of not being allowed to take the Delta Flyer out for a spin, the now Ensign Tom Paris had been happy when he finally got the chance again, going on a mission with Tuvok and Samantha Wildman. A few days in however, he suddenly found himself missing the safety of his cell in the brig.

“We’ve got another ion storm coming in,” he said, checking his sensors. “Great. We still haven’t gotten ourselves patched up from the last one. No way we’re making it back to Voyager today.”

“I am never leaving the ship again,” Samantha said. “I get stranded by the Kazon, Naomi gets sick, dipshit weapons dealer nearly blows Seven’s hand off; every time I step off Voyager something bad happens.”

“That is not wholly accurate,” Tuvok said. “I can recall with little effort at least two occasions where you were off Voyager, and nothing that could be described as negative occurred.” “Yeah, two,” Samantha said. “That doesn’t disprove my point. Leaving that ship is just bad luck.” “To be fair Sam,” Paris said, “it’s not like every day on Voyager herself is sunshine and bunnies.” He checked his console one more time to make sure the Flyer was stationary as trying to move during an ion storm only made it more dangerous. “We’ve got several minutes before it hits, better contact Naomi, let her know you’ll be delayed so she won’t worry.”

---

Naomi Wildman beamed with pride as she left the holodeck, having quickly and triumphantly solved the problem presented her in the current Flotter chapter on the holodeck she was on, and she was looking forward to sharing her accomplishments with her mom. She wasn’t going to have to wait too long though, because the reason she’d left the holodeck when she did was because Neelix had called to let her know that her mother was contacting from the Delta Flyer, and that Neelix had set up a visual communications link in her quarters.

Once she got there, Neelix simply stood back while Naomi sat at the table and looked at the screen. She’d asked where Seven of Nine was, but Neelix said that Seven was being kept busy on the bridge. Naomi thought it was kind of weird that her mom’s girlfriend wouldn’t be here, but figured maybe they’d talk later, and talk about the kind of grown up stuff she didn’t like being in the room for. “Hi Mom,” she said. “Hey sweetie,” Samantha replied. Naomi wasted no time in detailing how she’d helped the Flotter character make peace with a character named Trevis, even though deep down she knew that her mom probably knew these characters already since she’d also played in those holonovels as a kid. “I can show you how I did it tomorrow when you get back,” Naomi said, finally finished. Her mother sighed as the static on the channel got worse. “I’m sorry, Naomi, the away mission is taking longer than planned. It may be a few more days.” “Days?” Naomi said, frowning.

“‘Fraid so. But don’t worry, I’ll be bringing back some beautiful sillenite crystals for you and for Seven. Now I know what time it is there, so I want you to get ready for bed while I talk to Neelix, okay?” “All right,” Naomi said, sadly, getting up to do as her mother told her. ---

Neelix could tell even through the static that Samantha Wildman was putting on a brave face. As soon as Naomi went to her room to change, Neelix sat down. “Samantha?” he said. “What’s wrong?” “We got hit by an ion storm,” she said. “We took a beating, but I imagine it would be worse if we were in a regular shuttle.” “How bad?” “We’re trying to make repairs, but there’s another storm on the way.” The static got worse. Neelix saw Samantha look down. It was probably just as bad on her end too. “I need to go. Say goodnight to Naomi for me.” “Of course,” Neelix said. “Do you want me to say anything to Seven of Nine as well, or-” “I’m sure the Captain’s already briefed her on the situation. But thanks. The signal’s getting worse, I have to go.” The screen went black. Neelix sighed. For a moment he considered telling Naomi the truth about why her mother was delayed, but decided against it. Samantha hadn’t said anything, probably not wanting Naomi to worry unnecessarily. I won’t tell her yet, he thought. I just need to figure out when. Or maybe I’ll get lucky and Samantha, Tom, and Tuvok will all be home before it even becomes an issue.

-o-

Neelix, along with the rest of the senior staff still on-board listened quietly in the briefing room as the static-marred mayday message from Tuvok played for them, the sound cutting out just after his voice told them that they were looking for an emergency landing site for the Delta Flyer. “That was the last transmission we got from them,” Chakotay said. “We haven’t heard anything since. We’ve tried hailing them but they aren’t responding.” “If they’re looking for a place to land,” the Doctor said, “it must be pretty bad.” “Exactly what I was thinking,” B’Elanna said. “Can we pick them up on long range sensors?”

“We lost their energy signature when the second ion storm hit,” Harry Kim said. “But we’ve triangulated the coordinates of the distress call. They’ve entered a planetary system about 0.6 light years from here. That’s the good news. The bad is that another ion storm blocking our path. It’s a level five.” “Hmm,” Janeway said. “We’ve been through worse than a Level 5. And since Edwin’s shield reinforcements are still in place, we should be able to ride it out just fine. We’re not going to let a little bad weather get in the way of our rescue mission. Dismissed.” “What should I tell Naomi?” Neelix said, speaking up for the first time since the briefing started. “Or should I tell her anything for that matter?” Chakotay shrugged. “If you don’t feel comfortable handling that Neelix, perhaps I could help.” “That won’t be necessary Commander,” Neelix said. “I know she needs to be told, and it probably should come from me. Except for her mother and maybe Seven of Nine, I’m closer to her than anyone. I’m just worried about how she’ll handle it.” “Understandable,” Janeway said. “Look, just keep her occupied for awhile while we handle the rescue mission. If things go sideways, it’ll be my job to deliver the bad news.” “This reminds me,” B’Elanna said. “Has anyone told Seven yet?” “She’s aware of the Flyer’s damage from the first ion storm,” Harry said. “But us in this room are the only ones with the latest information. I’m sure she’ll handle it fine though. This is the woman who was able to save us all from a killer nebula, while in the middle of a nervous breakdown no less,” he added, referring to last year’s month-long period where all but Seven and the Doctor had to sleep in stasis tubes. “This is different though,” Janeway said. “How so?” Neelix said, wondering where the captain was going with this. “It’s a matter of scale,” she said. “The larger the number of people in danger, the easier it is to detach and focus on the task at hand. There’s a huge difference between a hundred and twenty plus, and three. And when one of those three is someone you’re emotionally attached to…” “I would remind you that my boyfriend is one of the people in danger,” B’Elanna said. “And I don’t see anyone worrying about me not being able to focus.” “I’ve known you longer, I know I don’t need to,” Janeway said. “We’ve all gone through something like this before. But for Seven this is still new, she’s never had to perform with these kinds of stakes before.”

“With all due respect Captain,” Harry said, “I think you’re selling her short. I’m confident Seven of Nine won’t let her connection to Sam cloud her judgement, and we’ll probably need her skills on this mission.” “I agree,” Neelix said. “Same here,” the Doctor said. Janeway shrugged. “You’re probably right,” she said. “Harry, let her know the situation. Neelix, keep Naomi occupied, like I said. Everyone else, let’s start putting a rescue plan together.”

---

Seven of Nine was slightly confused. When Janeway summoned her to the bridge and updated her on the Delta Flyer’s situation, Seven began to feel a sense of panic, not unlike the one she’d had weeks before when Edwin was allowing himself to die in sickbay. She couldn’t quite understand why though. The concern for Samantha, of course was natural, and she imagined that B’Elanna Torres felt much the same way about Tom Paris, whose life was also in danger aboard the Flyer. During her time on the ship however, the entire ship had been in danger more times than should have been statistically probable. By extension, Sam was in danger then too. Seven just could not discern what made this different.

Maybe it’s because I helped design the shuttle, she found herself thinking as she went over schematics on a PADD that Harry had handed her. If I’d been more involved perhaps it wouldn’t be so badly damaged. “Has Naomi been informed?” she asked Lieutenant Kim. “Neelix is going to handle that,” Harry said. “but not just yet. I can’t blame him for being reluctant, no one wants to be the bearer of bad news.” “Perhaps that is for the best,” Seven said. “I would offer to tell her myself, but as Sam as pointed out to me more than once I still require improvement in the, to use her words, ‘tact department.’”

Harry chuckled at that. Seven had not intended the statement to be amusing, but she decided to keep that to herself.

“I should probably steer clear of Naomi for the remainder of the operation,” she said. “If I see her she will likely ask me about the status of her mother, and much like Sam I do not like deceiving her.” “You’ve had to lie to her before?” Harry said. “Yes,” she said. Harry looked for a moment like he might ask for further details on that, but he didn’t, for which Seven was grateful as she would not have given him any. None of the falsehoods were large ones, it was simply a matter of there being things that Sam felt it was in Naomi’s best interest that she not know about until she was an adult. Seven was skeptical, but chose to defer to Samantha on the matter.

What will I do if she doesn’t come back? she thought. She tried to push the intrusive thought aside, but it kept nagging at her quietly in the back of her mind, so she instead tried to focus harder on the information on her PADD, working to put together a rescue mission.

---

As Tom Paris pushed the thrusters on the Delta Flyer to their limits, Samantha kept her focus on the console screen, trying to find somewhere, anywhere, to land the ship. With warp drive and even impulse engines off-line though, she knew they were only delaying the inevitable and that the ion storm was going to hit them.

“And to think that being demoted and having to spend a month in the brig would end up not being the worst thing to happen to me this year,” she heard Paris mutter. “The storm is throwing off my readings,” she said, “but there is definitely a big rock nearby, I just can’t find it.” The ship shuddered. “The wave front is accelerating,” Tuvok said. “Less than two minutes to impact.” “Great, so I’ve only got about thirty seconds to land this thing,” Tom said. “Samantha, I hate to rush you-” “Got it,” she said, “Finally. I read a class-M atmosphere, and a benamite mantle.” She quickly transferred the distance and coordinates to Tom’s console. “Benamite? I want to land this shuttle, not bury it,” he said as he turned the shuttle towards the planet which would hopefully protect them from more ion storms. “Well, we could always just try to surf the ion storm,” Samantha snarked, her patience starting to waver as the shuddering got worse. “We’ve entered the upper atmosphere,” Tuvok said a few seconds later. Samantha continued her scans. “Nothing but impact craters and volcanoes,” she said, “this is not a good landing place.” “The storm is closing,” Tuvok said. “Shields are already at maximum.” “It’s gonna have to do,” Tom said. “So long as we don’t land in a volcano we should be fine.” “Starboard thrusters are down,” Tuvok said. “Damn,” Tom said. “This is just not my day.” “We’re going in too fast,” Samantha said, finally starting to panic. “Hang on!” Tom yelled.

The ship shook violently, there were loud clanging noises, Samantha felt her head hit something, and her vision became fuzzy. She didn’t remember being unconscious, but when she opened her eyes, she saw that she’d been moved from where she’d been sitting, and she was very, very sore.

“Wha-what happened?” she said, touching a sore spot on her head, and seeing blood on the tips of her fingers. Tom was scanning her with a medical tricorder. Samantha found herself glad that he had agreed to be trained as a field medic. “We made it. -ish,” Tom said. “The Delta Flyer’s first real planetary landing wasn’t exactly an auspicious one. We’re three kilometers under the surface. At least our primary hull is still in one piece.” “Wish I felt the same way,” Samantha said. “You’ll be okay,” Tom said. “Minor fractures, a concussion, nothing I can’t handle.” “You’re a better nurse than you are a liar, Ensign,” Samantha grunted and clutched her side, which was hurting worse now. Tom closed the medical tricorder and sighed. “You have a punctured kidney,” he said. “You need surgery.” Samantha nodded. “I have transmitted another distress call,” Tuvok said. “So far, no response.” “I’ve got to talk to Naomi,” Samantha said, feeling scared. “And Annie. My girls, they’ll be so worried about me.”

“Conserve your strength, Ensign,” Tuvok said. “Mr. Paris and I have the situation under control.”

“Sam, I’m going to give you a mild sedative and something for the pain, okay?” Tom said, holding up a hypospray. Samantha nodded. She felt a little woozy after Tom applied the hypospray, but she could still hear him and Tuvok as they discussed their situation. Were she not drugged, it might’ve made her panic more. “Any chance we could abandon ship and walk out of here?” Tom said. “Unlikely,” Tuvok said. “We’re far too deep underground, and the cavern behind us has filled up with fluorine gas.” “Seriously?” Tom said, sounding incredulous. “Fluorine? How did it not all ignite when we crashed?” “Unknown,” Tuvok admitted. Samantha, not wanting to fall asleep, tried to remember everything she could about fluorine gas and had to agree with Tom. That type of gas was so reactive water would ignite it, and now there was a huge cave full of it right behind them. Three ion storms in one day, a crash landing, and surrounded by a gas that can explode if you look at it wrong. Welcome to the worst day of my life, she thought.

“Our best option,” she heard Tuvok say, “is to wait for Voyager.”

-o-

Naomi kept thinking about how her mom hadn’t contacted her in awhile, how Seven of Nine seemed to be avoiding her, and how nervous Neelix seemed to be. Something was going on, and no one was telling her and it was making her mad enough that nothing the Doctor was telling her about botany was registering.

The Doctor was saying something about organelles when Naomi finally just said what was on her mind. “My Mom was supposed to call me today. Why hasn’t she?” The Doctor paused for a moment. “Well,” he said, “she’s probably just busy.” The Doctor was still smiling like he was when he was giving his lessons, but Naomi felt something was a little off with the smile, like it was there just to make her feel better. “Now let’s have a little look at the cell wall,” the Doctor said, tapping a button on the console screen in front of her.

“Can we try to call her?” she said. The Doctor didn’t answer right away. “Well,” he started to say but was interrupted when the door to sickbay opened. “Neelix, so happy to see you,” the Doctor said. Neelix seemed surprised at that. “Um, okay,” Neelix said. “I was just coming by to pick up Naomi. We’re going to do another Flotter story on the holodeck today. I’m not too early am I?” “I was just asking the Doctor if we could call Mom on the Delta Flyer,” Naomi said. Neelix sighed. He looked at the Doctor, who nodded and stepped into his office, leaving her and Neelix alone. “I should have said something sooner,” Neelix said. Naomi suddenly felt very nervous. “The Delta Flyer got hit pretty bad by some ion storms and had to land on a planetoid to make repairs. We can’t talk to them right now because of the damage. I’m sure you’re scared right now, and it’s okay to be scared, but I want you to know that everyone is doing everything they can to make sure the Flyer and everyone on it comes home safe. Okay?” Naomi didn’t say anything. She just sat there. She did feel a little scared, like Neelix said she would, but she was also mad. Mad at him for not telling her right away that her mom was in trouble, mad at her mother for not saying she was in trouble the last time she called, mad at ion storms…

She got out of her chair and just left sickbay. Neelix followed her, asking her if she was okay but she just ignored him. She wanted to go somewhere where she could feel safe, so she went to holodeck one and activated the Flotter program. When Neelix tried to follow her in she just yelled “No!” at him and asked the computer to seal the door. She walked as far as the nearest tree, which wasn’t very far since the simulation was of a forest, leaned against it, and cried.

---

Seven of Nine worked at her console in the astrometrics lab. She was concerned for Sam, but she wasn’t allowing her fear to cloud her judgement. If pressed, she would have to admit that she just didn’t know if she could emotionally handle losing her, but that was all the more reason not to be reckless. She imagined that being allowed to work on the rescue mission played a large part, if not the largest, in helping maintain her calm.

“Computer, switch to polythermal imaging and enhance resolution,” she said. As she said so she heard the door open behind her. She glanced over her shoulder and saw Neelix enter. “Do you require assistance, Neelix?” she said. “Maybe. I’m worried about Naomi,” Neelix said. He sighed, then added, “I messed up. I should’ve told her sooner, but I didn’t and I think waiting only made it worse.” “How much did you tell her?” Seven said. “Not much, just that the Flyer was in trouble and had to land. I didn’t tell her it crashed though.” “I’ve found that Naomi is more clever and resilient than many on board Voyager give her credit for. She may well be angry that she wasn’t informed sooner about her mother’s situation, but I doubt that will hold for long. She will understand that you were only trying to protect her.” “I could’ve done a better job of it, but thanks anyway Seven. Since she knows now, maybe you should talk to her before going down there to join the rescue team. She noticed how you weren’t saying much to her the past few days.” “I will do that. Currently I am mapping the caverns around the crash site.” Seven stopped, and looked up from her console. “Do you have any experience mapping caverns, Neelix?” “Not using technology like this, but I see where you’re going with that. Just tell me which buttons to push and I’ll keep the program going while you talk to Naomi.” “Thank you,” Seven said. She gave Neelix a pat on the shoulder, a reassuring gesture that Samantha had done for her on numerous occasions. “If it is any consolation, the fact that you are willing to admit you were in error means you are unlikely to make a similar mistake in the future.”

“It doesn’t make me feel much better, Seven,” Neelix said. “but thanks for trying anyway. I suppose it’s a good thing I’m only a godparent and not a real parent.” “That is not for me to say,” Seven said. As she started to leave, her comm badge chirped. “Commander Chakotay to Seven of Nine.” “Yes, Commander,” Seven said. “Rescue Team Alpha needs that data,” Chakotay said, his voice suggesting urgency. Seven sighed. “I will meet you at the transporter site.” She closed the communication and turned to Neelix. “I don’t think I’m going to have time to talk to Naomi after all. Keep looking after her Neelix. She’ll need someone to talk to once the initial shock has worn off, if it hasn’t already.”

“Okay. And Seven? Bring them home.” “I intend to.”

---

“Ready, Tuvok?” Tom said. “Ready,” Tuvok said. Samantha heard much of what was going on since the crash, but wasn’t sure what they were ready for. She had been drifting in and out of consciousness the whole time since they’d crashed, and the painkillers Tom was giving her were still working but they were also making it hard to focus.

“Cross your fingers,” she heard Tom say. He reached into an open panel, touched something, and something on the panel up at the front where Tuvok was seated sparked. “Damn,” Tom grunted. “The magnetic relays have overloaded,” Tuvok said. “We’d better find another way to polarize this hull, or Voyager’s sensors won’t be able to pick us up,” Tom said. “Do not give up hope,” Tuvok said. “Probability of rescue is admittedly low, but it is not statistically impossible.” “Comforting,” Tom said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “If we don’t make it,” Samantha said softly, “who’s going to look after Naomi?” “The most likely outcome would be that Neelix and Seven of Nine would share that responsibility,” Tuvok said. “That is, of course, assuming we do not get rescued, which you should not rule out.” Samantha scoffed, followed by a wince as the pain in her side flared up again. “Our ship has Borg enhanced sensors and they still haven’t found us yet. If my honey’s tech can’t find us-” “I’d hate to be the one who gives Seven the order to abandon the search,” Tom said under his breath, not realizing that Samantha could hear him. “Shut up, Tom,” she said. “Sorry,” he replied, looking embarrassed. “You are concerned for your daughter, this is understandable,” Tuvok said. “I would remind you however that I am also a parent. My youngest child has been without her father for four years. Yet I am certain of her well-being. Your child will likewise survive and prosper, no matter what becomes of us.” “He’s right,” Tom said, the first time she’d heard him say anything to or about Tuvok that wasn’t dripping with sarcasm since the crash. “There’s not a sentient on Voyager that wouldn’t take a phaser blast for that kid and you know it.” Samantha felt tears well up, but not from the pain.

“Thank you,” she said.

---

Seven of Nine walked around the cavern with her tricorder out, trying to learn everything she could about the cavern they were in. She, along with Chakotay, Joe Carey, and the rest of Rescue Team Alpha had found a piece of one of the Delta Flyer’s nacelles. While Chakotay informed the captain, Seven put together the data she collected. The cavern ahead of them had collapsed, but there was a hull signature behind the debris. She almost smiled, certain that not only had Sam and the others been found but they were likely alive, albeit trapped. Trapped however was preferable to dead under the majority of circumstances.

Soon the other rescue teams were there, as were the phaser drills. She continued scanning as the drills operated, making sure that the activity didn’t cause another cave-in that would kill them as well. As progress was made, Seven was able to get more information in her tricorder about the cavern ahead of them, including the composition of the gas… “Oh no,” she uttered before yelling at the team to stop the drills. “What is it?” Carey asked. She handed him her tricorder. “Fluorine gas,” she said. “If we pierce the final layer with a phaser it will ignite, destroying the cave, the Delta Flyer, and us with it.” “Son of a bitch,” Carey said. “How did that even happen?” “We could name this whole solar system after Murphy’s Law,” Chakotay said in exasperation. “We can’t just give up and leave them there, but long range sensors show yet another ion storm coming which would likely cause another cave in cutting off all hope.” “Another ion storm?” Seven said, not even hiding the shock in her voice. Ion storms were not a rare thing in the galaxy, but for a single star system to have four of them, four of massive size, in less than an Earth standard week was so ridiculous that she felt like punching something, regardless of the fact that doing so would accomplish approximately nothing. “Beaming through rock isn’t impossible,” Carey said. “It’s the amount that’s keeping us from getting our people out of there. Maybe if we keep drilling, but stop just before we reach where the gas is-” “Except the transporter beam would likely ignite the gas as well,” Seven said. “Possible,” Carey admitted. “But I don’t have any other ideas.”

“Nor do I,” Seven admitted. “Alright,” Chakotay said. “you two try to come up with a way to bleed that gas out of the cave without igniting it. But work fast. We’ve got a few hours at best before the Captain gives the order to abort the mission.”

-o-

Inside the Delta Flyer, Tom Paris was recording a goodbye message for B’Elanna. Samantha didn’t want to eavesdrop, but it was difficult giving how she couldn’t move, and the ship, while larger on the inside that a standard shuttlecraft, just didn’t have enough room for there to be much in the way of private space. Tuvok was writing out his message to his family on a PADD. Sam wasn’t sure which way she was going to go with that just yet, or even if she should bother. Would anyone ever see or hear my last words anyway? she thought.

“Warning. Life support has fallen to critical levels,” the computer said, cutting off Tom mid-sentence. “Don’t mind the computer, she’s just jealous that I’m spending my last few moments talking to you. So long,” Tom said. As he hit the button to end recording, Samantha let out a bitter laugh. “There are men who can’t say ‘I love you.’ And Tom Paris is their God-king,” she said. “Do you really want to spend your final moments on the mortal coil being a smart ass, Sam?” Tom said, though there was no real anger to speak of in his voice, just resignation. She believed he didn’t really care how she spoke to him at the end, just that he was used to being the one to come back with a quip, so why stop now.

“I’m sorry,” she said, and she meant it. She chalked up this uncharacteristic pettiness to the slowly fading sedatives and painkillers in her system. Tom had offered her more as there was still several doses worth in the Flyer’s medkit, but she refused. She did not want to be doped up when she made her own goodbye message, which she finally decided would be a visual one, like Tom’s. With Tom’s helping her up since she still couldn’t walk, she got into the chair and started the recording. “Computer, encode message for delivery to Naomi Wildman, and Seven of Nine.” “Acknowledged,” the computer said. “Hi,” she said. “I know you’re both feeling very sad right now but I want you to listen to me very carefully, okay? First of all, I love you. Both of you. Naomi, I am so proud of you. How smart you are, how funny, how kind, how determined to learn new things. You are going to grow up to do extraordinary things. And you listen to Seven of Nine and to Neelix, they’ll be taking care of you now.

“Seven, Annika, I know that this will be harder on you than anyone. But don’t let it stop you from continuing to explore your humanity. Don’t be afraid to keep learning new things, about other organics and about yourself. Don’t use me as anchor. Mourn for however long you feel is right, but if another girl comes along who makes your heart beat faster the way I did, don’t pass on that chance.” Samantha stopped talking for a moment, wiping tears out of her eyes. “Goodbye, Naomi. Goodbye, Annika Hansen. I love you both, so much.” “Warning. Oxygen depletion in ten minutes,” the computer said just before Sam ended the recording.

Sam heard a sniff, and turned to see Tom Paris wiping his eyes. “Okay, I want a do-over,” he said.

---

Neelix walked onto the holodeck, the forest from the Flotter stories still smoldering from when the trees had been burned in the last chapter. From what he knew of the story there was at least one way, if not more, to restore it, but it appeared that Naomi had not done so yet. He considered for a moment that maybe she just hadn’t figured out how, but realized that far more likely was she wasn’t even trying. She was probably too upset about everything that was going on with her mother and the Delta Flyer.

“Naomi?” he called out. “Go away!” Trevis, a character from the holonovel yelled at him. The anthropomorphized tree looked as angry as his voice suggested he was, though if it was at him or at the fact that he was still partially smoldering he wasn’t sure. “She doesn’t want to talk to you,” Trevis continued. So he’s mad at me then, Neelix thought. Can’t say I blame him.

“You lied,” another voice said. Neelix saw Flotter, a water elemental type character, standing just behind and the to the right of Trevis. “I thought you were vaporized,” Neelix said. “Naomi re-liquified me. Now leave!”

Neelix sighed. He didn’t have time for this, so he told the computer to delete the characters. “Unable to comply,” the computer’s voice said. “Holodeck controls have been encoded.” “Great, probably something Seven taught her,” Neelix said. “Look, Flotter, Trevis, I know I made a mistake. I should’ve told her sooner. That’s why I’m here to apologize, to try and make things right.”

“I wonder if the liar can swim,” Flotter said. “We could always hang him from one of my branches,” Trevis said. Good gods who wrote this thing? Neelix thought. This is supposed to be for children. “Naomi,” Neelix called out. “Please let me talk to you.” “It’s okay,” he heard Naomi’s voice say. She stood from behind the fallen tree she’d been hiding behind. “You be nice,” Trevis said. “No more lying,” Flotter said, pointing a finger in Neelix’s face. Neelix walked around the two characters and went and sat next to Naomi. “Is my mother dead?” she asked, not looking him the eye. “We don’t know,” Neelix said. “The rescue operation is still going on.” “What happened?” “The Flyer was hit by an ion storm. They tried to land on the planet below us to do repairs, but crashed.” “I saw debris. Fires. A crater.” Neelix noticed that Naomi still wasn’t looking at him when she talked, like she couldn’t bear to look at him after he’d kept her mother’s situation from her. “But not the hull. Until we know for sure, I am not giving up on them being alive. Seven of Nine hasn’t, she’s down there helping with the rescue effort right now.” “Do you really think they might find her?” “Yes, I do. Your mother has Tom Paris and Tuvok with her, and they’ve survived worse than a shuttle crash before.” “How do I know you’re telling me the truth this time?” Neelix thought about it for moment. “I never told you this before, but when I was younger, I lost my mother. My whole family. There was a war, and they died.” “Who started it?” Naomi said, looking at him now.

“It doesn’t really matter,” Neelix said, not wanting to admit that his people had been the aggressors. “Not anymore. Either way, it was still the worst thing that ever happened to me. I wanted to tell you the truth, but every time I came close, I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. I don’t know if I was protecting you, or myself. I let you down Naomi, and I am so sorry.” “Why didn’t Seven tell me? She loves my mom, why didn’t she tell me?” “Seven is still learning about what it’s like to be human,” Neelix said. “I don’t think she was ready for that kind of responsibility, having to be the one to tell a child that their parent was in danger. So she just stayed focus on the rescue effort. I think it helped her stay sane. Though I imagine she’s as scared as you are.”

Naomi reached out and touched Neelix’s hand. Neelix was sure she was about to say she forgave him, but the ship suddenly shuddered. “All hands to emergency stations,” Janeway's voice said over the comm. “The approaching ion storm has just upgraded to level eight.” “Ion storm? What’s that?” Flotter said.

---

“Level eight? What the hell is wrong with this star system?” Joe Carey shouted when the rescue team in the cavern received the call from the captain. “No, no, no,” Seven muttered. Progress on the rescue had been slow, but they were so close, she just knew it, even though the data on her tricorder told her it was even odds at this point. For the first time since she’d heard about the Delta Flyer’s troubles several days ago, Seven of Nine crossed the line from fear for her girlfriend’s safety into full blown anxiety. Her hand shook, unwanted visions of Samantha being crushed by kilotons of rock filled her mind, and she was pretty sure she was about to cry.

“Just a few more meters,” Chakotay told the captain over his comm badge. “When that storm hits, your cavern is going to destabilize,” Janeway said. “You’ve got six minutes, make the most of it.” “All right,” Chakotay said. “Keep going, we’ve almost cleared enough rock to be able to beam the whole shuttle out through the rock.” “But we haven’t been able to clear the fluorine gas yet,” B’Elanna said. “We’ll have to risk it,” Chakotay said. “It’s that or we lose them for good to another cave-in.” “I swear, it’s like this system is cursed,” B’Elanna said. “I was thinking the exact same thing,” Carey said. “Focus,” Seven snapped at them. Rather than getting mad at her as they usually did when she was so curt, they did as she asked. She actually felt bad for having yelled at them, but this task was just too important. She made a mental note to apologize later, once Samantha was safe and sound.

---

“Warning. Oxygen depletion in two minutes,” the computer said. “You know, I think I’m just gonna turn that damn thing off. I don’t need a stopwatch running on my impending death,” Tom said.

“In accepting the inevitable,” Tuvok said, “one finds peace.” “Yeah, I suppose you’re right. I guess this isn’t how I figured it would all end.” “Did you envision perhaps a more heroic death?” “Yeah, why not? Why not go out like Captain Kirk, saving the Enterprise-B and a bunch of refugees from an anomaly? Or Captain Garrett, paving the way for peace with the Klingon Empire by going down fighting against the Romulans? I can think of worse ways to go.” “Like bleeding out from your kidneys?” Samantha coughed out. Tom was debating whether to not to reply to that, considering that he didn’t want to risk the last words Samantha Wildman ever heard would be sarcastic ones, when he heard a sound that it took him a second to recognize. When he did, he laughed. “They did it,” he said after laughing. “They found us. Those are phaser noises, I’d recognize them anywhere!”

---

Seven of Nine and the rest of the team was beamed aboard just seconds after the Delta Flyer had been beamed to the shuttle bay with the aid of pattern enhancers. Seven did not wait to be dismissed before just dropping her gear on the pad and running, heading for the shuttle bay. When she got there, she saw Ensign Brooks helping Tom Paris step down. He looked a little dizzy and clearly needed the ensign’s help staying upright, but appeared otherwise unharmed, Tuvok climbing out of the shuttle right behind him. “Sam?” she said. Tom looked at her. “We had to have her beamed directly to sickbay,” he said. “She needed surgery for internal bleeding. I’m sure the Doc-” Seven didn’t wait for Tom to finish. She slapped her comm badge so hard it nearly fell off. “Seven of Nine to Naomi Wildman, meet me outside sickbay,” she said, running again, and nearly knocking over several crewmen as she made her way to sickbay. When she got there, Naomi was already outside, and Neelix was with her. The latter leaning against the bulkhead while the former was pacing until she spotted Seven. Without saying a word, Naomi ran to her, wrapping her arms around her. “Is she…” Seven said, but couldn’t bring herself to finish the question. “The Doctor told us to wait outside,” Naomi said, trying not to sob as she spoke. Seven couldn’t blame her. “Seven, it’s okay that you didn’t tell me Mom was in trouble. I know you were scared. I’m scared too.” “I’m sorry,” Seven said. “I was so focused on bringing Sam home I didn’t think about what was happening to you.” “I’m sure she’ll be fine,” Neelix said. “She was still conscious when they beamed her on board. That has to be a good sign, right?” “I believe it is,” Seven said, though she had to admit she wasn’t one hundred percent sure of that. The three of them waited outside in the hall, moving to let people past them when they had to but mainly waiting quietly. When the quiet got to be too much for Seven, she started to ask Naomi about how her holonovels were going, when the door to sickbay opened. The Doctor stood there, smiling. “Naomi, Seven, you can come in. Mr. Neelix should wait out here so as not to crowd her.” “No problem,” Neelix said, smiling himself. Seven followed behind Naomi, who quickly ran into her mother’s arms. Seven moved more slowly, not wanting to interrupt the reunion. When Sam saw her, she reached out an arm and motioned for Seven to join them in a group hug, which she did gladly. “Good to see you again, Annie,” Sam whispered in her easy. “Likewise,” Seven said. “I think it goes without saying,” Sam said, “that I am never getting in a shuttle ever again.” Seven of Nine, for the first time in what had felt like an eternity, laughed.

#a fire of devotion #part 2 #chapter four #star trek voyager #fan fiction #sam7

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