🔑

you all pestered me for it and here it is. the closeness analysis/ theory.

now if you didn't see I basically had this theory that the closer to BIG and COTY we get in the DAPG timeline the closer dan and phil sit to each other. Dan made a comment about how them playing Heartthrob being like a gay soft launch and that got me thinking of some other ways they could have done it and one of those being the idea that as time goes on you get less and less strict and worrisome about what others think of you and so they end up gravitating closer and closer.

This post will be under a see more cos its probably gonna be long af.

I will be splitting it into stages.

2014 -15

2016 - 17

2018

revival

sorry the screenshots arent clickable to make bigger tumblr only allows for 30 on a post so i had to group them together!

(i will not be covering horror games apart from in the revival stage and i will also not be talking much about gamingmas 2023)

2014 - 15

now when i initially went to collect my evidence, i was suddenly worried maybe i kinda had things wrong because i feel like in Donkey Kong Country (the first dapg video, see screenshot below) they're sat pretty close but honestly when we get to how they sit a lot later on you'll see that this is actually pretty far apart

now here are some screenshots for the inital look at at the end of them we'll talk (this will be the layout for most of this post i think)

now of course this is only a selection of those year's videos if i screenshotted them all i fear this post would never end. now these first 2 years are a good mix of at desk videos on sofa videos. i noticed from some other videos not show here that in sofa videos they rend to sit a lot closer to each other than they do at the desk, this is kinda funny to me cos really they definitely have room for a wider frame on the couch if they wanted to sit like normal people.

2016 - 17

2016 and the start of 2017 feel like a mixed bag of how close together they are but i did notice that the more into 2017 we got the more they seemed to be shoulder to shoulder! these also started to wean out sofa sitting games (not 100% gone yet but almost). now if you're wondering why i've kept this screenshot apart its cos this is the last one in the first london apartment.

and honestly from here on out is where i believe the "soft launching" begins!

so lets finish 2017 and see if im right!

just had to single out this screenshot for a sec:

in case anyone wondered that is the face dan made during dream daddy when phil reads "we were roommates for a while too"

softlaunch?

anyway moving on

watching these videos definitely feels like something changed btw, while they still arent as close as we'll start seeing them sit, i definitely noticed more often they were shoulder to shoulder. but like a new room has definitely changed the vibe a little bit between them, and now we can move on to the next and final year of pre hiatus dapg, where things as you will see immediately start to change.

2018

like i said... immediately we are met with this, i would also like to let everyone know that 2018 is my favourite era of pre hiatus dapg

lets see what the rest of this year will bring

now i'm splitting 2018 up into parts because i need to do a whole talk about the tour situations so for now lets look at the above screenshots, now its very obvious that they are sitting so much closer to each other which i think is really funny considering how big that room is and often in this section of videos there is a lot of room either side of them so they literally do not need to be that close.

now lets talk about the tour bus. this is how close they're sitting

thats for sure a 1 person seat yet they've both forced themselves on even tho the sofa literally behind them would have been perfectly fine to sit on, and they cant give me "this is the only place to set up the camera" babe its really not theres a whole surface behind you.

okay thank you for listening to this, moving on to the final part of 2018!

(the last 2 screenshots are out of order oops)

idk about you but yeah i think they are definetly a lot closer than they were way back in 2014. i really dont have a lot to say other than that, and i have definetly proven my theory so now we've established that lets have a brief look at post hiatus dapg!

Revival

Now this is gonna be really brief its just a summary of where we are post BIG/COTY and post hiatus (things my brain still cant quite believe is real)

now here are the revival moments i wanna give a mention!

firstly sims season ep 3 when dan moves his chair away from phil and their wheels are literally locked together, pushing phil's chair too

heres dan looking into the monitor and then moving closer to phil <3

and finally

hand hold

thanks for reading all this and sorry if it didnt live up to the hype lmao

Hey, remember the soulmate au by tiyoin(?) I recently read your post abt idia and Leona reacting to yuu being their mates, but I wanna take it a step further since I saw idias line abt the family curse (this has yandere implications so if it's not your cup of tea please feel free to just ignore, nothing is outright mentioned tho)

What if yuu has a family curse similar to the aishi family in yandere simulator? (It's been years since I touched the game so if the lore changed I'm basing it off of 2018 ish lore, just with my own twist) basically yes, yuu CAN feel emotions, they're just muted and barely there. Given the right conditions (like falling in love or spending time with friends) and/or antidepressants they'll basically be like any other person, without them it's like a less severe version of the aishi women pre-falling in love

So, afab ppl born in yuus family, once falling in love, start losing their sanities and adopt yandere like behavior (stalking, increasing rage and jealousy, willingness to murder, etc) unfortunately this means they usually die young (20s or 30s) how quickly/young they die is based on their willpower (resisting the urges) and when/if they fall in love (so someone falling in love for the first time in their 40s and having insane willpower, caving in 20 years later in their 60s has more luck than a 16 year old falling in love and caving in almost immediately). Unfortunately everyone is a carrier, men carry the gene and can pass it to their daughters, but it only presents in the women/afab ppl, so transfems won't be affected but transmascs will.

What if yuu fell in love already (in their own world) and has just been doing a really REALLY good job at Resisting The Urges™️. Like, sometimes they slip up and cave in to anger or get ridiculously jealous, but they try their hardest to tamp down the feelings. Yuu has sworn off falling in love (again) and has given up their dream of having a big family bc of the curse, they're even distancing themselves from their object of affection in an attempt to "be normal again" at the cost of their own sanity.

So yuu gets transported to twst, and without their darling, they have the chance to be normal again, assuming they can get past the initial panic frenzy. Then the soul bond is revealed and they just go "nope. Not this shit again" and spouts cryptic messages about a family curse and swearing off love. I'm pretty sure most of the boys would feel a bit hurt by that lmao

This is mostly made for idia since his segment is what sparked the idea in the first place, but which characters from most to least likely do you think would try to pursue mc and figure out the truth to leave them alone and try to move on? I personally can't see someone like kalim giving up on both but I think the octatrio would try to look for the truth but be 50/50 on pursuing yuu or dropping them like a hot potato. Idia I think would try to relate to yuu and try to pursue them, but I think he'd probably be a bit put off once yuu starts dropping hints about the curse (he's a weeb so it won't take long for him and maybe Ortho to put 2+2 together and figure out the curse)

tiyon's soulmate au can be found here, their first post inspired some asks, which led to my own soulbound au the rules of which can be found here. Please support tiyon and interact with their soulmate au! They're a very creative blog and deserve the attention~ give them some reblogs!

so. uh. I got this ask when I first woke up and 1) very happy to hear from you Rose, always lovely to get a new ask and 2) yandere? sim? has lore? I did not think people actually played the game? help. i've fallen and misplaced my life alert. As a rule I don't really write for a Yuu who is just x character from y game/anime (it is in my rules) so while I was at work realizing I might be old I was trying to think of a way to do this that wasn't just yan sim (I wanted something properly gn) and I think I've got something? I am currently beating away the desire to info dump on you about the myth of Sigurd and Brunhilde (i could scream about that for hours oh god oh please i have written an actual au for that but efkjbekjrgbjrthnytrh) So here is the basic idea:

Yuu ran afoul of a witch in their world and was appropriately cursed. Given the myth I was inspired by I don't think Yuu did anything bad, but they still made the witch mad so they got cursed to lose all reason should they ever fall in love.

"You will be thine own destruction!" Cackles the witch and Yuu, who is actually normal unlike trey this person takes a deep breath and resigns themselves to researching a way to minimize the effects and maybe break it? They don't know they thought magic was fake until they thought they were just doing a favor for someone but turns out they pissed off Baba fucking Yaga.

They start to isolate themselves since they notice the curse starting to eat at them when they are around anyone the love; they consider going back to the witch and asking for further clarification but they can't seem to find them anywhere so they take some deep breaths and do their best to just be normal.

When they end up in Twisted Wonderland, and start feeling... weird. And it only gets worse when Crowley speculates that they might have been brought to Twisted Wonderland because they posses a soulbond.

And Yuu immediately freaks out because they don't want to kill anyone.

Now as for your question for who would try to pursue Yuu vs just leave them... well I don't really like writing un reciprocated feelings so I hesitate to say any of the cast would drop Yuu. In my au it isn't possible for soulbonds to not be reciprocated, and they are already sort of seen as a curse by mages so this... complication might not be normal but it isn't unexpected if that makes sense. Which would probably make Yuu swearing off love hurt even worse.

Kalim wouldn't want to abandon Yuu. Not ever, no matter how much of a danger they could be to him. Hell, he's willing to forgive people who are trying to poison him on the off chance they might regret it. But he is the heir of House Al-Asim, and I could see his dad paying someone to take Yuu out to keep his son safe. Something Jamil sees coming from a mile away and has to just keep quiet about. Something I can see Jamil feeling bad about, he might not like Kalim but you didn't ask for anything that happened to you. And yet the Asim's took your life from you anyway.

Have to disagree about the octatrio just a bit. Floyd would be into this. And so would Jade. But especially Floyd, oh hee hee ha ha his soul mate wants to kill him? Say less he is on his way to get his ass eat beat with an engagement ring in hand. Both he and Jade would be a little disappointed when the curse is broken and you aren't actively trying to kill him anymore... maybe you could try and poison him huh? Like old times?

I wrote 20 paper pages of soulbond au stuff for Azul so I will try to be brief here but... I don't think this situation would be one that made him try to break the bond. He has... complicated feelings about soulbonds already. If anything I could see him thinking he deserves this.

Now Idia. He's complicated. Pre-overblot he has given up on the concept of breaking his own curse, and I could see him feeling the same way about yours. Ortho on the other hand... even before he gets his soul he wants to help. After the overblot I can see Idia pursuing Yuu determined to find the truth and save them. Not that he wouldn't interact with them before that, he's a bit nihilistic so I can see him just making a bunch of jokes about the situation or promising to let Yuu kill him "after this next round." Or just straight up asking them to when he has to hit pity in one of his gachas. It's just cringe enough that it snaps Yuu out of the curse fog for long enough for the two of them to be normal around each other. And by normal I mean incredibly awkward

Anyway that's all I've got. Thank you for the ask ♡

DP X DC WRITING PROMPT #1

(I don't know if someone has already written this idea yet. If someone has tho please give me the info/link so I can read it. 👀

This might be the only prompt I do, because my brain likes to keep my creativity behind bars a majority of the time. That and anxiety. I've never done a post like this before. Also, most of my knowledge is from DP not DC. Please forgive me if I get something wrong.)

(#) = Notes at the end of post

(*) = Just me building off of other ideas.

short prompt #1 →

short prompt #2 →

✦

Lair of Mystery

The House of Mystery is Danny's lair or vacation lair(1) and ever since he outlived his friends and family(2), he's been coming to the House of Mystery whenever he needs a break from his kingly duties. Since it's the Infinite Realms, the HoM exists in every universe, but due to it not always being in the form of a literal house and difficult for outsiders to enter, it's never found. At least until now.

One day when he goes to the lair after (insert amount of time) he finds that the Justice League Dark have set up in his home. Initially, the JLD attack him but Danny puts a stop to that fast. It's his house, he can control anything inside it which includes anyone he deems an intruder. An interrogation more or less takes place, both parties are confused by the others presence, both sides get answers and are shocked by them. Danny because the JLD are a subdivision of a superhero agency that specializes in magic/the occult and the JLD because they've literally been using the house of a very powerful monarch without even knowing it.

Danny isn't angry the JLD are inside his house once he gets over the surprise. In fact, he's rather happy to have company of the non-ghost variety and is curious about their world full of superheroes and aliens. He comes to a decision. He will let the JLD continue to use his house as a base of operations if they are willing to agree to a few terms.

1. No one is to touch or use any artifacts they may find inside the HoM without his explicit permission. Some things are too dangerous for human hands to hold.

2. They seek him out of there is anything of the dead/occult variety threatening their world that they are unable to handle by themselves. (The JLD are shocked to learn of the King's past as a young hero as his explanation for this term. He misses those times and helping the JLD will also be another way to fulfill his obsession besides him being King.)

3. They spend time with him. Being the ruler of an infinitely expanding dimension gets pretty overwhelming and lonely at times. Even he needs a break. On top of missing his hero days, he misses the simpler times of being just a regular guy.

The JLD easily agree to his terms. From then on, they peacefully coexist in the HoM for many years to come. Danny is happier than he's been in a long time and so are the JLD because he's a wonderful host and has actually helped them with a few of their personal issues. Danny, having seen straight through his Captain Marvel form, gave Billy a fully furnished bedroom fit for a growing teenager and hidden from the others in the house. Danny and Billy hang out and play video games whenever they need to unwind with someone their age(3) with no secrets between them.

Danny helps Constantine with his soul contracts, seeing how they are fraying his soul and aging him prematurely. They have an easy camaraderie and sometimes share a bottle of whiskey together(4). Etc.

All is good.

Until some world ending threat of the dead/occult variety really does happen and the JLD call for Danny's help. He goes to them in full regalia with chainmail, breastplate with his hero symbol emblazoned on it, billowing, fur-collared purple cape with the cosmos displayed on the interior, a black crown incased in ice above his head with a sword of ghost ice in the hand that wears the newly dubbed Ring of (Peace?)(5). He doesn't even have to do anything. His presence alone is enough to intimidate the world ending threat into complete submission and is easily sent back into the Infinite Realms to face judgement for attacking the Living Realm.

This is how he's introduced to the rest of the Justice League. It's your choice on how they react and what happens beyond this point if you decide to take it further.

✦

This is entirely up for grabs and I wanna read whatever's written.

Notes:

(1) Your choice if it's his original lair or a vacation one depending on if you count Pariah's old castle as Danny's lair or not.

(2) Your choice if any of his friends or family members turn into ghosts.

(3) Danny is able to change the age of his form to an extent, an ability he inherited from his mentor, Clockwork. He uses it when he feels it would make it easier for other people to relate to him. He also has an eldritch form that he doesn't like to use in front of others unless he absolutely has to. You can leave any part of this detail out if you want to. I just thought it would be kinda cool and also a more subtle way of showing how powerful he is now.

(4) He is technically an adult (read several hundred years old) so he can partake if he wants to. Refer to note above this one.

(5) Should the function and name of the Ring of Rage change due to Danny being King or not? Your choice!

(*) Also, I read the House of Mystery is in a place called the Dreaming, a realm ruled by Morpheus the god of sleep and dreams. If this is truly the case, would it be plausible to say that Nocturne is just another one of Morpheus' forms? Would that mean the House of Mystery is in Nocturne's territory? If so, are Danny and Nocturne friends now? 👀

(*) the Dreaming is part of the Infinite Realms.

So now that I've actually watched 10 anime I wanted to rank them from best to worst

1. MSG: the Witch from Mercury; I have not seen any other Gundam show but I don't think this one is leaving #1 spot ever, and Bandai were cowards and homophobic for not showing us either a kiss or the wedding even though they got married, also I'm so mad that I episode 11 during the hug they didn't even say "I love you". The robots became the least interesting part of the robot show (8th I watched)

2. Bocchi the Rock!; probably what I want most anime to be, can't wait for the movie('s), this, G-Witch and Your Name might as well both be #1, also I want a cute Bocchi plush but I can't find one that's affordable without a high delivery :< (7th I watched)

3. Your Name; A movie that I found on a trans subreddit about a year ago, I didn't think it'd be as good as it was or that it'd affect me as much as it did, but I was left in tears when the credits came on, the story went somewhere completely than I thought it would, 10/10. also tied for first place, it deserves to be watched in a movie theater so much (10th I watched)

4. Cowboy Bebop; twink and his bear friend go on space adventures oh and the twink has his own shadow the hedgehog (6th one I watched)

5. BNA: Brand New Animal; the one of 2 studio Trigger show I've seen but from what I've read and heard they have a pretty mid reputation, I really liked it tho, I watched it around the time I came out and it's a pretty good trans allegory (still feel a tad weird about the ending) (4th one I watched)

6. Neon Genesis Evangelion (and the 1st movie); (don't)Get in the robot Shinji, I had been interested in it a bunch, big robots and all that, but only just got to it. The self perpetuating loop of abuse and trauma that Shinji and everyone gets put through because Genduo can't get over the death of his wife is horrible and I can't think of a more despicable antagonist than him, the movie was so fucked up. I still struggle to get what Seele was supposed to represent. I loved every scene where the Eva's get shown as demons, those looked real cool (9th I watched) (watched it entirely cuz of Signalis)

7. Cyberpunk Edgerunners; watched this before I played the game, the abuse that David went through combined with the end that I miss interpreted put me a bit off and I missed the point, but I got it after a rewatch (3rd one I watched)

8. JoJo's Bizarre Adventure; now that I've grown as a person I can safely say that it deserved to drift from spot 1, part 4 is still my fave. And it's still really really good in spite of how low it is (1st I watched)

9. Guilty Gear Xrd & Strive story mode; I am both counting and lumping them together, I liked the oversized Smurf with a gun, also Elphelt bby girl, still would've preferred an actual game tho(5th one I watched)

100000000000. Future Diary; I've watch this in a trade to get someone else to watch JoJo's, they came out better off with that deal, I am also no longer friends with that person (not because of the show but it's funny to mention) (2nd I watched) I still think it's missing some zeros, just add however many you believe it needs

Honorable mentions:

- Signalis; I know it's not an anime but it's anime adjacent and it's the best story I've ever played through, I don't even like horror games or gore at all that much but I will 100% this game and get all the endings, I wish I could talk about it more but spoiling ANYTHING about it feels wrong and making posts where half the words are censored just so fans get it isn't gonna work

- Pokemon; I loved the XYZ and B&W runs but I haven't watched it all and only remember catching it on TV

-Scott Pilgrim takes off, I watched the first few episodes, I don't particularly care for it, but it looks pretty good

Dishonorable mentions:

- Attack on Titan; I've had a run in with the series back when season 1 came out, back when I thought gore was cool, now I have negative interest in the series, I literally couldn't care less and I'm only putting it here to be fair

Conclusion:

After the Witch from Mercury and Evangelion, I don't care for big robots as much as I used to.

Oh and I'm watching some more soon-ish gimme recommendations

Get to know Me!

I'm a bit late but I've been tagged by @lfg1986-2 and @meraki-yao. Thank you, lovely people, for giving me a chance to talk about me (my favorite subject 🤓) 💜

Part 1: 

Last song: Spotify says Lips on you - Maroon 5 

Last film: High Strung, sadly 🥶

Currently reading:

Books : A biography of George Villiers and a French novel called Le dit du Mistral by Olivier Mak-Bouchard.

Fanfic : just starting the poem you make of me

Currently watching: a twitch stream on Lethal Company

Currently consuming: there is half a cup of cold black ‘winter granola’ tea to my right.

Currently craving: for old straight white men to do their job and do it correctly. And a rwrb sequel. And 3 to 5 post-canon fics in which Henry is forced to become King and he has to navigate his relationship with Alex at the same time.

Part 2:

1. Were you named after anyone? I don’t think so. I should have been named something else but friends of my parents had a child before I was born and named it that way so they changed their mind for me.

2. When was the last time you cried? Every time Alex and/or Henry is/are even slightly unhappy in a fic these days, so all the fucking time.

3.  Do you have kids?  I’ve adopted a 22-year-old Timothée Chalamet back in 2018 who has giving me enough headaches since then to feel legitimate to call myself a parent. (No, and I don’t want any).

4. What sports do you play/have you played?  I’ve played basketball for 7 years between 7 and 14. And Muggle Quidditch a few times as an adult 🤓

5. Do you use sarcasm?  In French, all the time. In English, it’s more delicate. 

6. What’s the first thing people notice about you?  How terrifying I am.

7. What’s your eye color?  Brown 

8. Scary movies or happy endings?  I still don’t get the point of most scary movies so I’m going to go with happy endings for now (ugh). But one day, I’ll understand scary movies. That the only thing about cinema that remains mysterious to me.  

9. Any talents? Being terrifying. I can write. And cook ok. 

10. Where were you born? Val-de-Marne, France. (Stayed there less than a week)

11. What are your hobbies? Reading. Writing. Playing video games. Watching people play video games. Watching tennis. Spending too much time on Tumblr. 

12. Do you have any pets?  My family has a cat who answers to no authority but mine (sometimes)

13. How tall are you? 159cm which apparently means 5’2” (I’m pocket sized)

14. Favorite subject in school? Depends on the year I guess. In middle school/junior high probably Maths, Biology and Sports.

 In High School probably Biology but then I kind of dropped it so German class because I was good at it at the time (I forgot everything tho) Literature and the idea of Philosophy. 

In college— I took a course where the thing to do was writing profiles and I love it so much it has kind of floated as a possible career for a while. Still does sometimes. I also took a course in a psychology department about social psychology I liked a lot. I had a lot of courses I liked actually but I remember more about the professors than the actual subject.

15. Dream job?  A writer living in Paris? Not in Paris actually, but I’m a basic bitch and and writing is like breathing to me.

Thank you again 🩷

Actually, you know what the funniest thing about shipping Leaf or any of the first four gen girls is? THEY'RE ALL WAY OLDER. You'd think the biggest complaint fandom would have is going nooOOO they're ELEVEN. Except for the part where Gen 1 and 3 happen at the same time. As do Gen 2 and 4. With a three year timeskip. And then a TWELVE year timeskip. Two more; BW2 and XY happen at the same time. Add another year for Alola. Red and Blue are stated to be like. I think it was 31 in the S/M/USUM games last I checked. Leaf would be almost 10 years older than Leon (his Charmander could've been a child of Red's Charizard for all we know! I actually like to write Kantrio visiting Galar and inspiring the next gen of trainers in game-verse.) Instead I'm mostly meddling around in the anime-verse which is mostly a found-family fic so all my ships are really just joked about. Doesn't mean I haven't recycled through a ship or two as I was playing around with the fic though lol, but alas the interest wore off and I need to stick with my themes. I'm curious though, is Leaf and Green endgame for you? Also LOVE whatever you're doing including Mizuki in your Au. With the aforementioned "Kanto kids are millennials" my Leaf (game-verse) has lowkey adopted the Alola kids (with them completely unknowing she was One of The Famous Kanto Trainers From The 1996(7?) Indigo League, until Red and Blue come to Alola and hugs! reunions! tfw your mom is super friendly with your idols and your world view is flipping upside down) what's your version :D also YES shaking your hand Red and Leaf siblings trueee. out of all the protags, they look the most like twins to me. Even Hilda and Hilbert have diff eye colors, May and Brendan literally have diff parents and skin tones. Probs the only character other than Kris and Gen 2 Gold who doesn't appear as an NPC. Also, I like Thundra as a name for a Raichu! I think it fits :) laughing at you going with Kaminari as a name tho, bc I legit did the same thing with the Jolteon I give her in pre-anime fic AU (its a whole mess) or Denki (yes bnha lmao) until I saw someone spell it was "Denshi" as a nickname and thought that was cute and made it less like an obvious reference. Also considered Raijuu.

I think the funniest thing about the core series timeline topic is the fact that technically, according to several developers, there actually IS no true canon timeline.

Masuda: It starts to get a little complicated if you pay too much attention to timelines. Like, there might be a professor that appears, and it wouldn’t make sense at all if we applied that kind of timeline logic. So we try not to apply it too rigorously.

Matsumiya: Elapsed time is secret. Imagine freely!

I certainly will imagine freely, Mr. Matsumiya.

I stated this in the last ask I answered, but Sisterhood operates under a different timeline than the "canon" one. For example, the events of SwSh take place after HGSS/DPP and before SM/USUM, which takes place before B2W2/SV. BW also takes place at the same time as XY, and between FRLG/ORAS and HGSS/DPP.

I do have a visual guide, for reference.

As for Leaf and Green being endgame, I've considered Sisterhood being somewhat similar to an otome game, in the sense that the protagonists have a selection of boys they could date in a series of alternate story paths. However, for most of them there is someone who I consider their "true" love interest in Sisterhood.

For Leaf, this is Green. For Touko, this is N. For Haruka, this is Steven. For Hikari/Akari, this is Volo. And so on.

Some of the male protagonists are the sibling of the female protagonists in Sisterhood: Leaf is Red's younger twin sister, Touko is Touya's older twin sister, Gloria is Victor's younger sister by two years, and Juliana is the older twin sister of Florian. As a sidenote, Gloria and Juliana are first cousins.

Even when they normally wouldn't appear in canon if not chosen as the protagonist, every character has a role in Sisterhood somewhere. Kris is Kotone's friendly (but still tough) rival!

And speaking of Leaf's Raichu, 'Kaminari' was sort of a beta name until I found something else I liked better.

This ended up being 'Lumine'.

Writeblr Q&A

I have been tagged by @scifimagpie (ty for tag) so I shall attempt to answer these questions lezzgo

1. What motivates you to write?

The soup brain has too many thoughts & I have to get them out. Also spite because my asshole 8th grade English teacher said my writing assignment was only worth a C (he was the ONLY one btw I got consistently vv high grades before him) & my Chinese immigrant friend got marked down for not being good at English. Fuck you Mr English teacher

2. A line/short snippet of your writing that you are most proud/happy of. If not maybe share a line of someone else's work you love (just please credit them)

(idk have this one from early chapter 2 I guess)

“You mean to say that I was bait,” Talin said.

“Not the word I would use, but in a way, yes,” Red Wolf confessed.

“Why?”

“You have been on the throne for less than a year. If someone wants you dead this quickly, something is amiss. I’d like to find out what.”

3. Which OC makes you smile every time you think/talk about them and what are they like?

My boy Red Wolf. He's just...yes. Autistic werewolf puppy. Could definitely kill me without hesitation or talk me to death with weapons knowledge. I would thank him if he punched me.

4. What process of writing do you enjoy the most?

I like not writing.

5. What part of writing do you think you are the best at? (Yes stroke your own ego it's okay)

Worldbuilding, no doubt. I am simultaneously the best and worst at worldbuilding. You want a 2000-word essay on how languages & regional dialects evolved over time? I gotchu covered no problem. Want me to stop elaborating on how Hellhound magic is linked to the moon & actually write my sequels? Absolutely not.

6. What is something in the writeblr community is most enjoyable?

I think the writeblr community is chill. Like y'all are just here for a good time and I can 100% respect that & get behind it. I get to write unhinged answers to these questions & not feel bad about it bc I don't have to self-impose ridiculous societal concepts such as 'maintain a professional image on social media'.

7. A writing tool/device you use that helps you with writing? (It could be speech to text, a writing program etc)

Scrivener? Am I allowed to say Scrivener even though I use at most like 2% of their features. I am the kind of person who if given nothing but a notes app & a two-hour uni class to sit through will hammer out a full chapter in those two hours instead of paying any attention to class. On the other hand if you want me to actually write during my free time I'm sorry I'm too busy procrastinating writing with art & procrastinating art with gaming.

8. A piece of worldbuilding that you like in your own story? (It could be the magic system, a particular place in the story, a law etc)

This is not a wise question to ask me (see: question 5) unless the goal was to make me sit here for ten minutes typing out an entire essay's worth of worldbuilding word vomit, in which case well played. However for the sake of my own free time & sanity:

The legal system in Kies Tor is probably the single greatest thing I've ever constructed & it plays a crucial part in the plot & was built off the early British/European court system as well as my own special interests in law & criminology. In short it's trying its best but it's also deeply fucked up and I love making the fucked up parts fuck up my characters.

9. What piece of advice would you say to encourage others to write if they are having a rough patch?

Don't feel pressured to write. If you're staring at the same thing for weeks/months on end of course it's gonna get stale. Heck this Q&A post is the most I've written in weeks.

10. Tag some people whose works you love/have been your biggest supporters:

@witch-king-of-angstmar ofc (no pressure to answer tho) but other than that I never know who to tag. I have social anxiety what is an interacting. If you see this on your dash consider yourself tagged

I have gotten two of my friends interested in Tsuma just by spamming GIFs so can confirm the Cutest Old Man In Media strategy has a high success rate... ON THAT NOTE. Very strong list of cuties... I Must Agree... Ikegami may be At Least A Little heinous but can't argue with that reasoning...

AND OK LISTEN. Some things I tell you are meant to be locked away in the vault never to be spoken of again... Tsutsumi's retirement is one of those... [just kidding it's fine LMAO he can do whatever makes him happy But I Will Cry I'm Sorry WE GET LIKE ONE MAINLINE GAME EVERY FOUR YEARS WHAT IF JO NEVER COMES BACK AAAA] BUT YES. YEAH. Very curious how he might do as a director...

DJKLGHJKLSDHLKS NO THAT'S THE FUNNIEST THING because I will generally just mention something in passing without actually recommending it but you'll go for it anyway😭😭😭NOT COMPLAINING. NOT COMPLAINING IN THE SLIGHTEST you have my deepest gratitude after A Lifetime of having my recommendations fall through and not being able to talk about stuff I'm into I cannot say this enough 😭😭😭😭😭but of course, definitely checking out the movie when I can :] I wish I could've watched before responding but busy day... oh well...

Speaking of! Kagerou Touge here and Tonbi here. They're both a bit less than three hours and split into two parts sooooo up to you <3 I don't remember enough about Tonbi to summarize it any better than what's on the page and It Is Best I Leave Kagerou A Surprise From Start To Finish. Bali Big Brother has been a bitch for years though unfortunately😩no subs may or may not be better than the machine-translated subs I had to work with

AGREED ON EVERYTHING ABOUT ATR NO NOTES NO ADDITIONS... YOU GET ME... KUROMI/MY MELODY-CORE SO REAL I felt like stopping and pointing whenever you could see their charms😭😭😭big fan... huge even... also the visual direction was Overall really good it is such a pretty anime and goes So Hard with the rain motif... SPEAKING OF THE FINALE WHICH I LOVED FOR THOSE SAME REASONS AS WELL Akira imagining breaking into a run to kiss Kondo on the cheek in the "date" ep but when she actually does it in real life it's a hug... as friends... broooooooo 😭😭😭😭😭

can't believe you're just hoarding keisuke gifs from me 😭 yes ive seen all of the show but STILL BUT REGARDLESS I'M GLAD YOU GOT OTHERS ON BOARD truly love this show a lot for keisuke... even beyond him tho not only is the cast really lovely but again i really love where the story went and how it all culminated in its last episodes..

and LISTEN Yes Ikegami Is A Lil Rank. Comes With Being A Yakuza but i do not have many options out of the charas ive seen tsutsumi play 😔 we been through this ttm is either very heinous or very serious in his films.... have to be careful..... plus i still think him smiling so much during the filming of the movie was cute, he's just a little silly to me 😔

but if tsutsumi isn't due to come back cause of his career, i gotta be the one to rip the bandaid off an assume jo prob won't return after this game. which either means 1.) joins the graveyard of tsutsumi charas 2.) He Somehow Gets Out Just Fine ???? And Just Does His Own Thing ???? Alone ???? either way... very intrigued to see what LaD8 has in store with that in mind...

there's some evil parasite in my brain that makes me immensely interested in things- like i accidentally went down a rabbit hole on The Superman Curse after someone made an aside comment about the latest flash movie DO NOT mention things to me because i will investigate it thoroughly... AND IM GLAD I DO CAUSE I FIND GEMS LIKE THESE !!!!!!!!! with that said i hope you enjoy the movie if you get to it !! (❁´◡`❁)

AND SPEAKING OF EPIC THANK YOU SO MUCH !!! i wouldn't mind with auto-generated subs tbh.... i've worked with less honestly BUT for now i'll see to watchin these two tonight ||ヽ(*￣▽￣*)ノミ|Ю

I REALLY LOVED THE RAIN THEME OF AtR. like Yeah That's On The Label BUT STILL it really fit the title so well... AND YAYA THE PARALLEL IN THE DATE EP FANTASY VS THE FINAL EP REALITY.... cinema.. LITERAL cinema i LOVE so so much the direction the anime went with their relationship... i said it enough but it's just so refreshing and great to see...

hi the voice over post turned out lenghrly so I'm gonna put a read more!

so there are three ways to localize a movie in a foreign language: subtitles and dubbing being the most common, and the third option is a voice over. in poland we call people who do voice overs "lektorzy filmowi", and movies using that technique are movies with lektor, as most commonly called, and a less common name "szeptanka". There are three versions of voice overs: the one used literally all the time in poland - single male voice, the one used super rarely back in the day and not used anymore - two voices, one male and one female, and one not used in poland at all, but I've read it was used in Russia - four voices, one male one female plus adding a little boy and a little girl. A voice over is different from a dubbing because the original audio in the original language is still being played in the movie, and the lektor actually speaks the translated sentences over that with a little delay, using a monotone voice with a very limited range of emoting. they're not voice actors! Most of lektor's were actually radio spikers at the time, without having any acting education! it might sound like the movies feel cluttered or layered but not really, we're 1 used to it and 2 this allows to hear the great voices and actor skills of the original cast while also hearing the polish translation, instead of hearing the same 4 voice actors again and again and again in all the movies. Especially since voice acting was not a wide spread profession at all back in the day! The drawback was that the overall audio, not only the original actors but also the music's and the effects had to be quieted down or driven out by the voice over. The biggest reason as to lektorstwo was used over other method tho was that at the time, which was after WW2, there were only two movie studios/studios working on bringing over movies in the whole country! Preparing dubbing was a really lengthy process, and a costly one too. And the old TVs had a terrible resolution for subtitles, which caused lektorstwo to spread and stay, and it was a practice adapted by the countries formerly belonging to ussr.

There are many lektor's who's voices are so iconic at this point that genuelly everyone cna immediately go "i know who this is"! Amd their specific way of talking during the movies makes it feel SO FUCKING WEIRD when you hear them talk outside of work it's like loterslly mind blowing because you've been hearing this voice narrating emotionlessly in movies for past 40 years and BAM it's just some guy speaking to u lol.

Movies and games (altho with games it was most usually voice acting, not lektor's) that were brought to poland with great lector'ing were usually the reason why certain media cemented themself as iconic in polish culture, because of their accessibility, timelessness and recognizabillity (is this even a word help?) of the lektors' voices.

Now, note how I said lektor's didn't display emotions or act during their voice overs beside raising their voice and accenting questions. The reason why Trailer Park Boys became HUGE in poland is because of its never seen before lector'ing and brilliant translations. TPB onky began to air in poland in 2007, after the 7th season finished (and at the time it was supposed to be the final one). Localization of the script was done by Antonina Kasprzak, and the voice over by Rafał Walentynowicz. And for the job, Walentynowicz took an approach that was never seen before, and never done again after, which was basicially free styling the way he said things and emoting along with the boys. It still wasn't anyhting like voice acting/dubbing, BUT it made the voice over feel dynamic, fresh and messy, perfect for the insanity and comedy of the show. Kasprzak's amazing translations also used the flexibility of polish language and the amount of creative ways to cuss to in a way tone down the vulgarity of the show, while at the same time making it even better than the original by bending the language to its limits. No kurwa every split second, instead every other combination of words, some which became iconic with time and r quoted constantly. If not for the translation and the incredible lector'ing, the show most probably wouldn't be as popular here as it is. Sadly, Walentowicz only voiced the 7 first seasons of the show, and we never got anyhting for the rest of them beside subtitles, even after many initiatives from the fans.

Another somewhat good example would be the game "Gothic" which has an LEGENDARY status in poland despite being extremly janky (i mean it the controls are. hellish) and not even being a polish game. But it came over to us with full VOICE ACTING! which was really not heard of before. And the voice acting was also so iconic that the game spread like a wild fire. How does this relate to voice overs if it was dubbed? Well, the main character Nameless is actually Lektor'd instead of voice acted like the rest of the characters! It can feel so insanely jarring but at the same time it gave us all brain worms and everyone was obsessed with it and to this time Nameless is actually considered an iconic performance.

The Wikipedia lists countries that use lekoring as: Belarus (4 voiced), Bulgaria (4 voiced), Georgia (only in shows, movies r presented with subtitles), Lithuania, Latvia, Mongolia, Poland (all using the standard single voice version) and Russia (4 voiced, but being hunted extinct by dubbing).

In other countries voicovers are never or rarely used, and if so, mostly for documentaries such like Discovery Planet, or in talk shows. Also none of this is to say that we don't have dubbings here at all! They're becoming more and more popular too, but even if a dubbed version is released, the lektor version is ALSO released, so in cinemas you can see both screenings with dubbing or voice over, and pick the one you prefer! Just imagine turning on the TV with some older movies playing and EVERYHRING is voice overd.

I'm gonna share some YouTube links to examples of lekoring, TPB lekoring, and Gothics weird hybrid voice acting/voice over! And after this post I'll post a tiktok a professional lektor voice overing old polish memes for fun lol! Thanks for reading i know this is long as hell!

Here is an 8 minute long video showcasing most iconic polish voices, feel free to skin and see the short movie examples! This does not hoever include Krystyna Czubówna, THE queen of nature documentaries and probably the most recognizable female voice in poland: https://youtu.be/jonfeHfQOtU

here is the most memes TPB clip in poland with the polish voice over, it's 2min long, including saying Kurde Faja: https://youtu.be/ZAedTEuH3Xc

and here is a 10min video of gothic quotes, sadly I didn't find soemthing putting a focus just on Nameless, but you can hear the difference between other characters voice acting, and his monotone flat voice(skip to 1:45): https://youtu.be/gYUfmLPCpD8

I decided to read through some of my oldest used-book-sale posts last night, like from 2010-12, and I have (re)learned so many things! A sampling:

1. Can confirm I've owned both Moonrunner and Alpha Dog, two (unrelated) titles on my perpetual "I'll read this soon probably definitely," since 2011. One, in my defense, is in a box somewhere and I have no idea where. The other is literally on my bookshelf in the apartment with me right now, the one that's not even double-stacked, where it's been since I bought it, and I have no excuses.

2. The Hanged Man was the first Francesca Lia Block book I ever read.

3. The paperback copy of Inkheart that I own is beaten up/wrinkled to hell, because this was back in my "earning $10k a year and spending at least half of it on student loan payments" era and also I had so little book sale experience that I was just excited to find a copy of a book I liked at all. tl;dr next time I see a nice copy I should feel free to upgrade.

4. I bought so many friggin' awesome computer games I never had time to play because fandom ate up what little time I wasn't spiritually crushed by my terrible paid-by-the-completed-piece job, and now my computers are too new to play them. (side note: the fact that this is even how computers and ~upgraded systems~ work is incredibly stupid. I'm so jealous that video game consoles don't die the way computers do.)

5. I bought the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants soundtrack?? What is even on it? Where IS it?? I can't possibly have decided to get rid of that...? But I have no memory of seeing this among my collection. Maybe I was still in my "I don't have room to keep everything" era and didn't like enough songs on it to justify keeping for the booklet and charm.

6. I bought (and didn't read or keep and in fact explicitly picked up in a bag sale to flip @ Half Price Books) a hardcover-with-dust-jacket vintage juvenile novel that didn't interest me at the time (Bridge of Friendship -- and tbh, the plot summary still doesn't excite me), but...Mabel Esther Allan! Who would later become dear to me via Home to the Island.

7. I considered giving 5 stars to The Fault in Our Stars in spite of my John Green Vendetta. I know it's because I got swept up in the giddy fandom rush on Tumblr in 2012 -- everyone in the Glee circles talking about The Land of Stories also was in love with this one -- but LMAO. "I will definitely buy the first copy I see for $2 or less." False. By the time I see one a few years later -- a special edition with an author Q&A and everything -- I will have forgotten almost all of the plot details and said, "Meh." (I left it 4 stars on Goodreads for The Memories tho)

8. I bought Double Trouble by Doreen Tovey in 2013, never having heard of her. It would take me fully 7 years to actually read one of her books (a different one I bought later). I still haven't read this one. Though in my defense, which is minimal since the first book I read was #7, I have only otherwise read book 1 and this is #6 in her set of memoirs.

9. As an aside -- in 2007, after losing my one precious flash drive at college, I finally bit the bullet and bought a replacement. This one held two gigabytes AND it "only cost $20."

(Sometimes you just gotta appreciate the rare thing that doesn't cost more now than it did in the past, you know? While we're at it, remember how gas prices were so bad in 2008 that sometimes minimum wage jobs weren't worth driving to, but they're basically still that price if not lower today? Just little gratitude things.)

i have thoughts about YIIK. nothing crazy deep it's just that i'm almost 13 hours in now at chapter 3 level 21 and i've been spending this whole time ragging on the game? deservedly so? but i also have some positive and mixed opinions towards it too and i wanna write them down in no particular order! (full transparency: i'm playing vers 1.25, with assist mode on so i can use the game's slow down mechanic whenever i want in battles, i have the sort of elemental weakness/resist system added in 1.25 turned off, and i'm sure some of the things i have to say will have to do with whether or not YIIK had the proper funds and time to achieve what i think could be done better but i have no knowledge on how that shit works. what do you want from me.)

i like the sort of low polygon/flat textures plastered on lumpy geometry/choppy frame rate style of the game's overall aesthetic and the character art for the different talk sprites is generally pretty well done (could've maybe used less gradient tool tho)

going off of that tho: the game's start menu has a references page that lists media that YIIK might either directly reference, make homages to, or have been at the very least inspired by and while that's nice and makes sense with the game's pseudo-retro feel i have this feeling that there wasn't that deep of an understanding about what makes of the media they listed like. good? and impactful? it just feels kinda surface level.

the music is also pretty alright! like i said i'm only at chapter 3 (so i've been to Flag Town and met up with Claudio and Chondra) but so far i haven't really heard a piece that i didn't at least passively enjoy (fun fact: there's different battle themes and one of them is done by Toby Fox! i've known about YIIK for a couple of years now but didn't actually know this until recently and i'm delighted to report that you hear it and go "oh yea that's Toby.")

voice acting is alright. it's passable. no particular character that i felt so far has been way better than all the others. like i said before tho sound mixing and levels and mic quality vary between characters and sometimes even between lines of dialogue? also Alex's internal dialogue (infamously) goes on longer than it needs to be a good chunk of the time considering this is an RPG and not a visual novel but also there would be pauses of up to like 5 seconds between lines on autoplay?? and it felt like the most awkward pause ever??? i haven't noticed that happening since chapter 1 ended tho so who fucking knows. i'm playing a pirated copy who gives a shit i guess. (on the Alex Doesn't Know How to Shut the Fuck Up point: this version of the game gives you an option at the beginning to play the game with reduced monologue but the original cut option is described as "ideal for those seeking a deeper understanding of the storyline" so like. FUCK your players who don't wanna hear Alex whack his own dick I GUESS.)

there've been a few lines of dialogue so far where i hear them and go "what was the fucking point of you saying that?"- same goes for some sections of player interaction (Alex talking amongst multiples of himself in his head after certain cutscenes not just being an automated event being the biggest thorn in my side)

i LOVE Rory being a tank character. his default pacifism "attack" making him a human shield along with his skill that lets him swap his HP and SP for when his health gets too low while defending the party is genuinely such a good combo. i'm looking at the vers 1.25 announcement made on steam and this is apparently a result of them improving Rory's "usefulness in battle" so you know what? good on the developers. i gotta tentatively give it to em on that one.

i don't mind everything in battles (from melee to skills to dodging) being QTEs but i don't like that there's never a window of time or a tutorial when you first go about using them so that you can get a feel for how they work ESPECIALLY for skills that require you to hit multiple buttons/sections and ESPECIALLY at the very beginning of the game. i think the game could've also benefited by having some accessibility settings.

speaking of i like that there's 2 separate QTE minigames for dodging - for attacks to only target one character and for attacks that target multiple characters - but in my experience the former is a lot hard to get a full on dodge rather than a defense buff without the slow down mechanic and i honestly don't know how to feel about it. like i'm sure that some players out there have a much harder time with the former or have an equally hard time with both but. still.

12/12-18/12/2022

Bleh week at work. Decent week outside with highlights of chocolate, cheese, and gaming. 💀

This week was less fun and more filled with meetings than I'd care for. Including at least two that started with 'do you have 5 minutes' and lasted for over an hour. I get that people are trying to cram stuff in before they leave on 19th and before the year end but... mercy. I'm still burnt out from 2020. 😭

I'm swinging wildly from being quite pleased about what I've done with Team 2 to being depressed about how underbaked some of the processes are, how messy the backlog is, and so on. Fortunately the new PM is helping now and my mantra of reducing WIP may actually get somewhere, and they will have a new DM joining just before the day in the office. \o/

On the bright side I made some notes from User Research for Team 1 and heard pop-up research results from the side project which has now finished. We also have an emerging solid plan for Team 1's work in the first Q and some ideas for making our programme check-ins different and more effective.

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The unexpected snow that paralysed UK transport as usual got in the way of a nice dinner with a friend. I still managed to join the

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If I ever find the strength to be a Lead or in the position to influence org-level roadmaps again (Doubt.) this is definitely something I'd like to try:

It seems so obivous now that I've seen it, I am bewildered why anyone bothered with the Gantt-y spreadsheet lines. 🤯

It might go well along Vaugh Tan's Boris framework as well, just to make sure the things NOT being done are super visible? https://vaughntan.org/unpacking-boris

This is a good vid:

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The unexpected snow that paralysed UK transport as usual got in the way of a nice dinner with a friend. I still managed to join the chocolate tasting group this month (we did bars originating from Tanzania) and use words like 'coarse', 'sour cherry', 'fruity but without a sour note at the end, a bit like apricot or banana' and hear other people describe stuff as 'the bin', 'sick', 'horrigyingly cloying'. One of the most pressured environments I've ever been in for sure. 😂 The chocolate in those sessions ranges between 70-85% so they day after in a bout of foolhardiness I went for a 100% hot choc at Knoops* and instead of something inexplicably disgusting I got a cup of hot, watery disappointment.

I failed miserably on the cheese advent calendar/cheese tasting front and mixed all my wonderful cheeses together to create (in all fairness pretty amazing) pasta cheese bakes. Farewell pre/post make model, we hardly knew ye. :'(

*I try to use Duck Duck Go more but even with string 'hot chocolate new row' and 'hot chocolate new row covent garden' this place was unfindable and I had to go with Google again. Sorry that I'm addicted to convenience I guess. -\(-__-)/-

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Puppet History made me cry.

I lost several more hours in Hades - it's way too easy to do just another run.

And of course I'm playing Witcher 3 again. I forgot just HOW MUCH empty space to run across there is in it. The writing remains gut-wrenching and I already found two new quests so overall I am having a very good time tho.

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NEXT WEEK

I feel like I've not watched a genuinely good film in ages. Maybe I'll try to change that. Maybe I'll just play games I've played before for 100 hours. 🙄

I might get started on a year-end personal retrospective and a personal plan. I've been asking the people I coach about theirs so it's only fair, right?

Booking things for the Interrail trip PROPERLY. Not just 2 days in Netherlands and then losing the will to live because of too many options and general anxiety. orz

NINJAMUFFIN DOING ANOTHER AMA ON TWITTER, HERE'S MORE SHIT FOR YA! keep in mind i'm just sharing the funkin related stuff, though i am including WAAAAY more than what i shared before ���� go check out ninja's twitter profile for questions about stuff like ritz! questions in blue, answers in orange. if yall don't wanna read everything i MIGHT make a version of this post where i replace the answers with my own summaries of em (and if the questions are long, those too)

and here's a link to the ama tweet itself! dunno if it's still goin

Q: I figure the answer will be yes but do you have more plans to implement more guest appearances from people in the newgrounds community into FNF? Or are you all gunna focus on OG lore and stuff going forward

A: for guest appearances, I think we have always seen it as getting a healthy mix of both. PERSONALLY I'd like to lean towards having more OG stuff than guest stuff, BUT it's all a matter of what other boys think of that as well. I'm not the sole person working on game!

Q: Are you gonna release the full FNF game or are you gonna be releasing week after week? Like, are you gonna release week 8 or are we gonna wait some years until The Full Ass Game comes out?

A: Release plan for FNF right now is a few more updates or whatev to the 'demo' we have out right now, and then a long silence of probably no updates whatsoever until the full game is done (which will likely be a few years). That's partly why we made kickstarter for game.

Q: Hey so like, how much will Fnf cost after it's finished? And when will you ask the supporters what they want the game on?

A: It's all subject to change, but right now it prob gonna be standard 15-25$ lil steam indie game.

We will ask Kickstarter pledgers and whatnot what they want the game on SUPER close to when its released, to keep options open if we get onto anything like a console people want.

Q: 1. how was your day

2. are you releasing a week 8 song early like week 7, or are you goin full lockdown

A: I am doing GOOD today, and I think recently I've been good in general.

up to the mood, but so far we doing good about not having anything leak or whatev, so I think it'd be fun to have update come out with people not knowing what to expect at all. Build dat intrigue

Q: Will fnf ever get official plushies?? Seems like an untapped market

A: FNF plushies will prob happen some point, we have a lot of current merch stuff on our plates already though! (Mostly kickstarter type stuff, shirts, pins, posters, and all the physical OST stuff) Its a lot to sort out, but in time more and more stuff will happen. We r jus 4 boys!

Q: did you ever expect your game to blow up as it did? what was your first reaction to seeing it become super popular

A: FNF never had a humble moment, literally day 1 before the prototype even came out, the vid on twitter had like 5K likes overnight. Then when ludum dare version came out, it got 5K likes again, like it wasnt just a fluke. Was crazy, and def felt like somethin was different wit FNF

Q: Do you plan on getting other people to come in to help with the music? That seems like a lot of work to dump on one person, what with the erect mode and whatnot.

I guess the question could apply to all aspects of development. Will you be bringing on more people to help?

A: We definitely are getting help from other people. We are always keeping an eye on people for various different things. In terms of programming, already I've gotten 2 people (MtH and Geokureli) to help with certain Week 7 stuff (charting/polish, and loading stuff). Shit like dat

Q: Oh, also, will the Steam version be Workshop compatible? That'd really help streamline the process of downloading mods.

A: Steam version of FNF will likely NOT be Steam workshop compatible, because we want all the mods to NOT be spread out through different places. There WILL be modding support that is as streamlined as Steam workshop though. Mainly for non-steam versions of the game!

Q: Are there any chances that the game will have a physical release? Also any updates on a switch port? I remember one of you guys talking/joking about it.

A: Not impossible for FNF to get a physical release. We would want to see how far we could go with it though. I think it'd be super easy to do something wit people like LimitedRun games or whatev, but I think stuff like that can only go so far. I wanna see Funkin in mf Walmart!!!!!!

not that LimitedRun isn't going to be an option! Just we consider and pursue many different things! FNF release is years away, so we have time to think about everything. Whole mindset can be different just a few months from now.

Q: Out of curiosity, how are you dealing with all the popularity? It blew up so fast id barely be able to handle it if I was in your shoes.

A: The only way I've been able to handle it is having the other boys on the crew and being able to talk to them about all the overwhelmingness.

Part of it feels very lonesome, feels like NO ONE can come close to comprehending exactly how I'm feeling, except them. also other PALS!!!

Q: Do you own any of the bootleg FNF merchandise? Like any bootleg plushies or anything?

A: i dont, i genuinely think they r a waste of money, and I know any bootleg shit that gets made, we can prob go about and make it, and make it 100x cooler because we actually put effort into shit. bootleg shit just in it for the coin, so they aint gettin that from me

Q: How did you go about getting in contact with sr pelo for skid and pumps vocals?

A: Pelo i think was familiar and pals wit PhantomArcade a bit thru various Newgrounds things and collabs and whatnot.

pelo retweeted the first OG FNF posts first ever, and brought a LOT of attention to it. to pay him back, we put skid and pump in game! ask dave for more info prob

Q: what's the plan for having the full ass game open source if it's gonna cost money? couldn't people just download the source and compile the game for free?

A: when FNF is fully released, the full source code will be released as well.

the game will be DRM free so it will be way easier for people to redistribute the released/offical .exe instead of compiling it, so that's not the issue anyways. people will pay for things if they like it

Q: What are the chances of it getting on consoles like switch or Playstation, ps5 would definitely be my preferred way to play

A: it'd be a matter of hiring someone to build out backend stuff for those specific consoles. someone who knows their way around all the wacky code stuff, AND knows console hardware stuff. Then its just a matter of hittin up those console manufacturers (Sony, Microsoft, or Nintendo)

the CLOSEST one is SWITCH. pretty much all of that backend is already made, so it just a matter of gettin all that access and shit.

i think in any case though, there's a lot of NDA stuff required, i dunno how much we'd be able to talk about it even IF we get that stuf sorted

Q: any ideas of releasing it on epic store or another platform?

A: Right now, the only thing that is 100% confirmed and WILL happen is a Steam version, itchio version, and mobile versions on respective app stores. Other storefronts aren't out of the picture though, but we don't want to spread ourselves too thin with it.

Q: Will you continue using HaxeFlixel to make the rest of FNF?

A: yes, because it is what I'm the most technically proficient in, and generally is VERY flexible. just a matter of ME becoming a better coder. It's ALL open source, so if I need something done a certain way, either I can do it, or we can hire someone to do it.

Q: have you seen game theory's videos on your game yet and if so, what do you think about them? (not talking about his predictions because i dont want spoilers. i like mystery)

A: it is always good silly fun to watch the Game Theory vids about Funkin with some pals, and see what matpat thinks of the game. i lov the vids, but wish he used my face less! Or at least used a cuter pic of me like this one!!

Q: Ok so: What does the future of FNF look like to you?

A: future of FNF is a rhythm game that not only exceeds every expectation that people have of it, but subverts most expectations and conventions as well.

Q: Do you plan on retouching on older weeks once the game is fully out? Like reanimating sprites, redoing some charting, updating the background, etc

A: retouching and probably overhauling certain aspects is almost definitely gonna happen. Everything is fluid and can be changed (and should be changed when necessary). i dont think anything should be too attached to, especially this early on in development

Q: I honestly do not care if the answer to this is vague as hell to keep surprises and shit lol but… Since Week 7 was the closest we’ll get to a playable girlfriend (still bf controlling tho), do you have plans to make girlfriend playable in spin-off things or just freeplay?

A: wouldnt be out of the picture for a playable GF, i don't think we've had some hard thing AGAINST it. just a matter of what we want out of the game, and what sort of story or whatev we could do with that concept

Q: How do BF and GF manage to meet famous newgrounds characters (such as pico, tankman and the others to come) like is this all in one universe/ timeline or are they being brought in?

A: i think they are all just there existing. i think there's a lot of wacky things in other media that try to justify crossovers, like MULTIVERSE bullshit or TIMELINE shit, but i dunno, its like subspace emissary. Captain Falcon and Olimar from Pikmin just hang out. Shit like dat

disclaimer that all lore shit is in phantomarcade head pretty much and maybe there is wacky dimensions or somethin

Q: Will the game have dlc?

A: its not too unlikely that we'd have expansions of some sort, but i mean right now we plan on packing in as much as we can into base game, and trying to make that as pure as possible.

if there is ANY dlc, i would personally want it to be 100% free updates

Q: How did you meet Phantom Arcade, Kawai Sprite, and EvilSker? And what do you think about the community and its controversies?

A: me and phantomarcade been fukin around NG for years so years and years ago we naturally crossed paths and became pals

about 2 years ago i found kawaisprites music on NG, and started talkin wit him, made Ritz wit him and we fell in lov

and evilsk8r i met cuz of FNF!!!

quik elaborate on evilsk8r, wanted artist for gamejam FNF was for (ludum dare), and OG person i asked wasnt available, so he referred me to evilsk8r, who I have never met or talked to before ever.

Hey guys white Thanos here and you know what grinds my gears. Defending Sword and Shield using the balance defence

(cw I'mma get a little real later in this. I kinda go off) So you know something I keep thinking back to is the balance defence. That the Dex was cut to balance the game but that only really means for online that now costs money and with have a toxic rank farming meta. Taking out LandoT and Megas doesn't balance shit, it just shifts the meta.

Let's say every current OU and up on Smogon aren't in Galar, that just means the UU will be the new OU. New abilities, types, gameplay changes and moves just like in past generations will balance out what was busted with what is now busted. Gen 1 psychic type was broken so Gen 2 added steel, a pure ghost and Dark. Gen 6 Megamom was busted so she got nerfed in gen 7. So let's just say they planned for that with Dynamax, but that's a fucking lie because even if Caterpie can be a big chunby still gets out classes by every single other Pokémon. But okay sure maybe, and that's a big fat maybe, Max moves balance each other. You know even if Max Guard can let you just stall out three free turns. We still have Gigantamax and my God does that break some shit.

Gigantamax means the bit about letting everyone shine is a meme. You know we're getting a Pikachu, Charizard and Gyrados and you can't tell me you don't believe Gamefreak would. But you know what really made me HMMMMMMMMMMM real hard? Galarian Weezing and his ability. When I first saw him I wondered what could possibly be better than ground immunity, and then Neutralizing gas happened. So what I really think that meant was "we're getting tired of balance testing this ability so we're just gonna cut the ones that would be too strong"

This all coming from someone who grew up with Pokémon and watched it excitingly evolve from gen 1 to gen 5. Gen 6 was the first time I was a little confused about how lacking the game was, I still liked it and wrote it off as 3D jitters. ORAS was the most disappointment I've felt in myself. I kept having my rose tinted goggles blurred by the 3D. I actually had a deep existential crisis about if I was wrong to support something that had given me so much happiness. Sun and Moon actually looked promising, or they would if every trailer for a few months weren't live action commercials hiding a lot of game. I still bought them, a bit sad Kalos was left unfinished but shit happens. Then USUM got announced at first I was wondering "like a black 2/white 2 with a continuation.. how will that work" it was just the Pokémon Light version but cut into two fucking games.

I think that was the final straw and Let's go broke the camerupt's back and soul. "Oh it's just a kiddy spinoff" kids aren't dumb stop that, I was a big dumb baby when I beat Yellow. The real reason it was the way it was is Masuda's long standing belief that cellphone kids have ADD and need shorter less meaty games. But none of that mattered, some of y'all were waiting for your gen 4 remake, I got the remake I wanted. I wanted them to remake Yellow every gen since Hoenn. So I can relive my first Pokémon game with the mind of a child who can actually read and memorize the type chart. I got it along with everything I have ever wished for. I got following Pokémon, riding Pokémon, partner Pokémon dress up, a rocket grunt uniform, cool post game content and fucking co-op. It came at a heavy cost tho as the game I had been waiting for turns out to be a game made for what Masuda thinks a child is. Overall easier, no non gen 1 Pokémon allowed, not even evos and babies, that co-op acts as a big brother mode where you fucking 2 on 1 these poor children and worst of all the Pokémon go features makes everything seem pointless outside of catching new Pokémon. But after a year of crushed hope at least 2019 would give me a great full Pokémon game the looks like a proper switch game where I can play with all my Bros.

I kinda went on a tangent their but hopefully some of you realize not everyone is some "hurr hurr big company bad" dumdum. I just want Gamefreak to delay the game, TCPI to delay the global push to actually think these things out and maybe bring back Gap years and filler seasons in the anime.

Grace & Janis

Grace: bitch you better have hidden all MY baby pics!!! Janis: obvs my number 1 priority Grace: mhmmmmmm don't be letting that boy see me looking like that Grace: as if our house isn't cringe enough Janis: what, a child? Janis: still got those chubby cheeks, cutie Grace: ew don't even Grace: I learned how to contour for good reason thank you Janis: mhmmmmmm Janis: curse this family and its DNA Janis: [sends her all the baby Grace pics we don't have] Grace: STOP Janis: 😂 Janis: n'awh Grace: you're so annoying it's no wonder you're their new fave Grace: so who's more 😍😍 for him, mum or dad? Janis: bit rude to their old fave Janis: giving you a place to bunk, have some manners Janis: 🤔 hmm, it's close Janis: probably the mother, chatting about some art project he has to do so Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Grace: like if you're not gonna offer to do it for him, hush babes Janis: the idea of her coming at me with a 📷 got me like Janis: [suitably grumpy child pic] Grace: 😂😂😂😂 Grace: does he have to use 📷? she could just get one of her old 🎨 out Janis: oh yes, 'cos the idea of posing for a portrait thrills me more Janis: I think it can be any medium, it's his thing Grace: you only have to sit there tho Janis: not trying to spend any more time here with them tho Grace: 👌👌 true Janis: strictly dinner kinda deal Grace: I'm so sure dad made soooo many courses anyway Janis: I told him to be chill Janis: so naturally he hasn't Grace: ugh Grace: do not miss his dinner time check ins Janis: its only been a couple of days Janis: wouldn't get comfortable not missing anything Grace: UM can you not remind me that I have to come back Grace: so rude Janis: 🙄🙄🙄 Grace: cute that you miss me tho hun 💜 Janis: like I'll be here hun Grace: you invited him there 🤞🤞 that you EVER see him again Janis: no I didn't Janis: I wanted them off my back, that's the plan Janis: now and I can leave and they won't freak Grace: he's still meeting them Janis: ? Janis: he'll get over it, it's one night Grace: !!! & 😱😱😱 Grace: it's mum & dad how long do they even need to make you wanna die Janis: it's more funny when you don't care Janis: worry about yourself Grace: I'm fine thanks so much Janis: were you waiting to talk about yourself Janis: 'cos go ahead Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Janis: never stopped you before Grace: excuse you Janis: hm? Grace: really nice catching up, babes Janis: hm Grace: see you soon or not Janis: toodles Grace: 💜👋💜 Janis: call off your bitch, will you Grace: ??? Janis: who do you think Janis: why does she even watch my stories Grace: idk or why you think I haven't already told her to get over it Janis: fuck's sake Grace: why do you even care if she watches your stories? literally everyone is rn Janis: I don't care if she watches but tell her not to message me Grace: I obvs will but she obvs isn't gonna listen to me Janis: if she doesn't she's getting a slap Grace: LOL Grace: you know who her dad is, you can't Janis: no I don't Janis: though she'd like to think everyone does Grace: OMG just block her Grace: you wanted mum and dad OFF your back Grace: literally why bring him to dinner to start more drama Janis: they don't like her either Janis: it's not drama Grace: Duh she'll cause it if you hit her Janis: then she better shut up then hadn't she Grace: what's she even saying? Janis: does it matter Grace: if you want me to message her after days of not Grace: like I'm gonna just hit her up without knowing anything Grace: I'd look mental Janis: you know what Janis: forget it Janis: god forbid you inconvenience yourself however slightly Grace: OMG just tell me Janis: it shouldn't fucking matter Janis: let her tell you since you're so keen to side with her already Grace: I can't even take sides if I don't know anything Janis: I'll sort it myself Grace: by fighting her Grace: for god's sake Janis: and what Janis: your approach has worked so well? Grace: okay so it's all my fault Janis: thanks but that admission don't really help Grace: STOP Grace: & just talk to me Janis: why Janis: so you can act like she's not your best friend Janis: that you don't know that she's been like this to me for years Grace: you're my sister Grace: I can give you a million secrets you can use Grace: tell me how bad it is first Janis: I ain't interesting in playing your little games Grace: so what do you want me to do? Grace: I'm literally saying I'll be on your side Janis: You brought her, you get her to go away Grace: okay Janis: good Grace: for you, sure Janis: how do you always make yourself the victim Grace: how do you have the nerve to ask me to do something & still act like a bitch Grace: you said it, she's my best friend Grace: this isn't gonna backfire on you Janis: She's already fucking me over, it doesn't need to backfire Janis: and it's no one's fault but you're own that she's your friend Janis: don't expect sympathy Grace: you think she can't do worse than a few DM's Grace: oh honey Janis: I'm not scared of her, get a grip, for fuck's sake Grace: so happy for you Grace: you know what, handle it yourself Grace: hit her, do whatever Janis: yeah no shit Janis: you've not done anything about her a day in your life Grace: yeah cos it's so easy Janis: poor you Grace: don't talk to me Janis: make your mind up jesus Grace: go away Grace: I'm so done with you & this Janis: get the fuck over yourself Janis: you were buzzing at the chance for more petty mean girl bullshit with her Janis: do something with your life and she might give a shit again, you're not using me for your in Grace: I wanted to help you Grace: until you reminded me why that's THE WORST idea ever Janis: you never help anyone Janis: saying you're nice and helpful but then never doing it 'cos everyone else is THE WORST Janis: don't make it true Grace: oh please Grace: I've never said I'm nice or helpful Janis: oh please, you do constantly Janis: you can't take responsibility for shit, it's me, it's her, it's your shitty exes, yeah? Janis: maybe it's you, Grace, you're the common denominator Grace: okay thanks Grace: you're really helpful Janis: I don't want to help you Janis: let's be clear Grace: Great, so shut up Janis: no Janis: this is your fucking fault, you should get an nth of the bullshit I get Grace: me and Mia aren't the same person Grace: if I had any control over her I'd have used it way before now Janis: you think you're any better? Janis: at least she's upfront about it Janis: got some balls Grace: 👌👌👌 Janis: you really are pathetic Grace: wow Janis: what Grace: if that's the best you can do, it's obvs why you wanted me to deal with her Janis: working with the material I'm given Janis: which is fuck all really, isn't it Janis: but no, you're known for your acerbic wit and silversharp tongue Janis: my mistake, please tell her off like you've never managed before Grace: are you like done yet or not? Janis: nope Janis: you actually thought I would ever come to you for help Janis: when have I ever needed you Grace: well you actually did so Grace: how awks Janis: It's actually awkward that you think me venting to you so you know what you started is a genuine cry for help Janis: your thing, can't take that from you Grace: if it's my thing I know the difference between venting & asking surely but go off babes Janis: Diego has less miscommunication in his life than you Grace: 👏 Janis: Genuinely Janis: you should really get help at school Janis: some kind of delay there Grace: yay we're back to how stupid I am Grace: been a min Janis: N'awh, not stupid Janis: probably a syndrome Janis: bet it's got a name, have a google Grace: 💜 Janis: let us know, get everyone to start talking really slowly at you and all Grace: I'm fine with none of you talking to me Grace: thanks though Janis: yeah Janis: that's why the only place you have to go is your sisters Janis: you've got no one but them so I'd get back on the 💜 train Janis: who the fuck would have you that ain't bound by bloodties and duty Grace: way ahead of you, babes Janis: stop slagging them off then as if you and me have a thing in common Grace: stop policing what I say Janis: say something worth hearing Grace: to you, no thanks Janis: to who Janis: already pointed out you have no one if you ain't got Mia Grace: obvs to no one then duh Janis: obvious for two reasons then Grace: sure Janis: 💔 Grace: yeah Janis: kiss and make up because everyone is sick of it Grace: 👌👌👌 Janis: Serious Grace: Chill, I'm sure she'll be my date to the vow renewal Grace: are you done with dad I need a q & a? Janis: what Grace: it's a simple question, hun Grace: literally need to talk catering so like are you done or not Janis: what are you talking about Grace: Rio and Buster being the most extra couple ever Grace: like hello? did mum and dad not fill you in Janis: you better be fucking joking Grace: 🙄🙄 Janis: if you send one more emoji I'll shove that phone down your throat Janis: are you serious Grace: like I'd make up a 2nd wedding Grace: get a grip Janis: this is bullshit, obviously not Grace: they're already married, babes, they have a kid, you're kinda too late to object Janis: fuck off as if you support it Janis: no one does, no one wants to go to that that's why they had to do it alone Grace: exactly, they could care less if I do or not Janis: well no one cares what you think Janis: it's irrelevant Janis: the point is, why have another wedding no one wants Janis: this is the last thing anyone needs Grace: cos they are holding their breath waiting for your RSVP or opinion I'm sure Grace: he asked & she said yes, that's how it works Janis: shut the fuck up Janis: this is the most selfish thing I've ever Janis: she's so full of shit Janis: it won't be happening Grace: it literally is happening though Janis: no it isn't Janis: not when she gets called out on what a hypocritical lying cunt she is Janis: see how much you feel like celebrating then Grace: as much as this fam ever does Grace: one big party 24 7 Janis: nah, fat chance Janis: they've not destroyed enough they wanna rub everyone's face in it, don't think so Janis: 3 lives they utterly fucked, there's no celebrating that Grace: not the way they see it Grace: & it's how they see it that matters to them so Janis: It's easy enough to change their mind Janis: fuck's sake Grace: How? Janis: not going to be you that does it so what's it to you Janis: roll over quicker than anyone asks, you Grace: it won't be you either Grace: he'd have to tell her to call it off for her to listen Janis: like fuck it won't Janis: someone has to say it Janis: she was here last time and she ain't no more Grace: & what did it change? Grace: they did it then & they'll do it now Janis: You're a quitter, I'm not asking you to get on board Janis: she's gonna listen Grace: If any of us told you to stop seeing Jimmy, you wouldn't Grace: they love each other, get over it Janis: and she ain't me Janis: if she cares even a degree of what she fakes Janis: she won't want another death on her hands Janis: it's not hard when what they're doing is sick and wrong Grace: stop it Janis: nah, like fuck Janis: if you cared about those kids like you fake, you'd want them taken off them Janis: the shit they're going to get Janis: and you cry every day about your shit life Janis: he should know better, his parents being what they were Grace: None of us want any of this Grace: but it's too late Janis: it's always too late with you Janis: no you can't do anything 'cos you're fucking weak and you need them all Janis: I don't need any of you, you can all rot Grace: Janis, don't Janis: fuck this shit Janis: fuck you Janis: fucking catering are you out your fucking mind Janis: over my dead body Grace: Stop saying that Grace: OMG Janis: You act like she was the crazy one Janis: she did the only thing that made any sense Janis: getting away from this toxic fucking family anyway she could Janis: you aren't even a real person and it's their fault and you do nothing about it Grace: Please don't fucking go Janis: Why would I stay Janis: why would you Janis: they have no right to miss her, none of them Janis: they all gave her reasons to get so far out her head that she'd fucking Janis: fuck Rio, fuck mum and fuck dad Grace: I can't do this on my own Janis: We've never been together Janis: you'd pick them every time Janis: you'd help her plan her bullshit wedding that's about nothing but showing off how much she gives a fuck about no one but him Grace: Give me something to do that isn't leave or kill myself Grace: I'm going mental here Janis: you should hit up Ollie, see if he's about it Janis: can be just like her Janis: she's doing just fine Grace: There's worse things to be than like her Janis: there's nothing worse Grace: at least she's happy Janis: she will be until one of hers dies Janis: then she'll be broken and pathetic like mum and dad Janis: and she doesn't have the excuse of not knowing better Janis: she helped kill Edie and then thought of ways she could make that situation even worse Janis: she's worse than them and has the nerve to act like what, some kind of mother figure doing her best for all of us Grace: She cared about Edie & she cares about us Janis: not enough to do the right thing Janis: they never do Grace: it wouldn't have saved her Grace: you know that Janis: that makes it alright then Janis: if mum did it first Janis: break her some more Janis: damage already done Janis: too late Janis: you're so fucking brainwashed and what do you get from it Janis: are you happy Gracie Janis: 'cos you're fucking collateral Grace: of course I'm not Janis: then stop drinking the kool-aid and telling me how good it tastes Grace: Rio's trying to help me, she's the only one who is Janis: yeah her saviour complex done everyone real well Janis: Junior's life isn't fucked at all because she had to live it for him Grace: I'm just saying I'm not gonna walk away from her cos Edie would want me to Grace: Junior's life is fucked cos he has shit taste in men & goes along with what everyone else wants Janis: This family loved to surround itself with dead girls it was trying to help Janis: and you're happy to be one of 'em Janis: don't pretend you want other options Grace: I don't wanna die Janis: 🤞 she has a baby for you that she won't give you then Janis: you're never gonna be the one 'helping' Janis: you aren't her or mum Janis: that is your role if you don't get out the fucking show, Grace Grace: we've established I'm not helpful, babes Janis: we've established you aren't a person Janis: even this, you can't be real Janis: what the fuck will it take Grace: you don't want real from me Grace: you literally never have Janis: you've never offered Janis: and I ain't waiting around for you Grace: Every time I try & talk to you, you shut me down Grace: you obvs aren't waiting for anything from me Janis: When have you ever tried to talk about something that matters Janis: I'm not talking to you about hair when people are fucking dying Grace: when have you ever let me Grace: you're a bitch way before then Janis: why would I be nice to that Janis: You don't like me, I'm not begging you either Grace: nothing that matters to me matters to you Janis: the colour of your fucking lip doesn't matter period Grace: that isn't real Janis: You've never been real Janis: you don't give me a fucking chance Grace: I can't be real with you cos you just make fun of everything that I say or feel or do Janis: and you and your friend don't Janis: nah, everything I do hasn't been fucking wrong to you since before we got our periods Grace: I've never backed her up on anything she said Grace: I don't call you stupid or ugly or any of the shit you call me Janis: you just call be a bitch and annoying and weird Janis: so if all of that's fake, everything you roll your eyes at because I just don't get it, just admit, you don't want to be real with me Janis: never fucking have, pretending it's 'cos I don't wear heels has always been an excuse Grace: You are a bitch and I do find you annoying and weird Grace: & you don't get me or any of the things that are hard for me cos they aren't for you Janis: that makes it alright then, you can say whatever you like to me because you perceieve yourself as life's victim and it's all fine for me Grace: we have different problems Grace: I'm not saying your life is perfect, I'm not that stupid Janis: just better than yours so why should you even try to be nice Janis: landed you with a great crowd, that Grace: you think you're better than me Grace: you literally always have Janis: no, you think I'm better than you Janis: and I didn't tear myself down so you could use me to build yourself up Janis: you aren't her and I'm not you Janis: why do you think you fell into that kind of relationship Grace: you are better than me & it makes it really hard to be around you, okay Janis: thanks Grace: it's not like any of this is how I want it Janis: how can you sit here and expect sympathy Janis: when I'm the one who's left with no one Janis: you can deal with the shit and have friends and have them, I can't do that Grace: you think I'm dealing? LOL Janis: deal with theirs Janis: and they'll love you for it Janis: none of them are gonna call you a doormat, just me Janis: 'cos they need a yes man Grace: well maybe I wouldn't be here if they did call me out ever Grace: at least you tell me the truth Janis: well maybe it gets exhausting being the only one telling the truth Janis: do you think she liked having to have every conversation be a confrontation Janis: do you think I Grace: it's exhausting being fake too if you were thinking about swapping Janis: like I said, you've got plenty of company Janis: they all are Grace: Yeah but I'm the only one getting told to see a therapist Grace: like I'd know where to start Janis: told you Janis: love a dead girl Janis: breeding and 'fixing' people when they've got no business is this family's shared hobby Janis: reason they ain't try to section me, section her Janis: take your shoelaces, where's the fun in actually doing something Janis: say you will, fucking say you have, did Janis: but never actually do Grace: they couldn't section you, you're not mental Grace: her either Janis: give her a case when I say I'll top myself if she goes ahead with this wedding, won't I Grace: No Grace: if being angry was all it takes half this fam would be gone Grace: & the wedding wouldn't happen cos he's the worst for it Janis: they should be, that's the fucking problem Janis: seperate cells, all of 'em Janis: and yeah, he's a cunt Grace: You don't have long if you really wanna stop it Janis: yeah? Grace: they are rushing but obvs won't tell me why Grace: maybe they think people will try and stop them idk Janis: Brazil one probably wasn't even legal Janis: why should I care about their kids really Janis: why should I try and help any of them Grace: they're just babies, they didn't ask for any of this Janis: maybe not but maybe those two deserve for those kids to grow and turn 'round and tell them how much they hate them for doing this Janis: fuck it, I can't think straight Janis: maybe that's enough, maybe I just won't go, I'll be gone Grace: you'll come back though, right? Janis: can't think about that Janis: I should be happy right now Janis: but no Janis: can't Grace: you can be happy Janis: how can I Janis: it never stops it never goes away Grace: idk just worry about yourself like you always say to me Grace: forget about them Janis: can't do that when you're here Grace: forget about me Janis: no I mean Janis: I can't be here, I can't be anywhere near any of you and be happy Janis: and one reason to stay doesn't outweight all the reasons to go Grace: you're saying you're gonna leave him, aren't you Janis: this isn't fair on him Grace: it wouldn't be fair to do that Grace: on you either Janis: I know that, all he needs is someone who can stay Janis: I can't do it Grace: he loves you so he needs you Grace: you love him Janis: yes Grace: he'd go with you if you asked him Janis: the kids can't come Grace: why do they need to? he's got a dad, right? Janis: no Janis: they need him Janis: and he needs them Grace: oh Janis: it's not easy Janis: even if it feels easier than staying Janis: it's still so fucking hard Grace: I love you & if you only listen to one thing I ever say then Grace: you're really gonna regret it if you fuck things up with him Janis: I know Janis: but I should have never have let him in Grace: but you have now Grace: not to be that it's too late bitch again Grace: but like Janis: bad things happened to him too Janis: happen Grace: so don't hurt him Janis: that's all I ever do Grace: no Grace: that's faker than anything I've ever Grace: shut up Janis: I don't want to Janis: she didn't either, I don't think Janis: it's just Janis: seems like the only way to end it all, all the suffering Grace: nobody wants to, I don't think even Mia wants that, way deep down Janis: you can't end other people's, only your own Janis: but causing it means you're having some effect, right Grace: she had so much love in her, that's how she could do it, hurt people that deep Grace: so do you Grace: but you don't have to be like her Janis: I don't know what the alternative is Janis: like I said, it feels like someone HAS to be saying these things Grace: I think it's this Grace: trying Grace: being honest means being honest about like everything Janis: it's hard to do both Janis: that's the problem Janis: how can you tell Rio she's a hypocritical bitch that has ultimately put herself first and tell her she still held it down all those times we needed her to Grace: I know, babes, trust Grace: cos they can both be true Grace: I hate you & I love you Grace: nothing's just a or just b Janis: I guess the thing is, they get the rest from everyone else Janis: like you said Janis: you wouldn't be here if I didn't tell you the bad shit Janis: no one would Grace: you can still be the call out queen Grace: if he's the only person who sees the real you, maybe that's okay Grace: maybe its like that anyway Janis: it feels wrong Janis: we didn't always hate each other Janis: all of us Grace: I didn't always hate myself Grace: it's just Grace: things happen Janis: too many things have Janis: that shouldn't have Grace: Yeah exactly so don't make yourself unhappy Grace: there's been so much of it Janis: she died for nothing Janis: if more and more keeps happening Janis: just makes it more true Grace: she died for nothing anyway Grace: she was 16 Janis: and if I act like it, it's a problem Janis: but Rio gets to openly ruin more kids and we're meant to be happy Janis: I refuse, I won't do it Grace: she's just trying to be happy Grace: like you want to be Janis: no Janis: you don't get to try at the expense of a helpless fucking kid Janis: that you made Janis: that's not how it works, this is what I'm saying Janis: we aren't doing this again and pretending that that's alright Grace: I'm not saying don't tell her what you think Janis: how could she Janis: twice Grace: I don't know Grace: I don't know how she could fall in love with him or any of it Janis: it's not love Grace: she thinks it is, & she let it happen Grace: I don't understand that Janis: she's selfish or it's trauma-bonding Janis: she can have either Janis: but she won't admit it regardless Grace: of course she won't Grace: so just let it go Janis: no Janis: there's consequences to the shit you do Grace: they're her consequences to deal with Janis: and one of them is that I hate her and I'm not going to let her forget that Edie died hating her too Janis: it's not enough to yet again put it on some kids Janis: say hey, wait to see how bad the bullying gets and the doubt and all of it Janis: then turn around and say why the fuck did you two do this Janis: they hurt people Janis: and they still are Janis: they should care Grace: I think they do Grace: but idk if that's enough or not Grace: or what'll happen to those babies or any of us Janis: it isn't enough Janis: they aren't Grace: what I know is if you keep hating like Edie did it'll hurt you like it hurt her Grace: you have to stop Janis: we should be hurting Janis: she shouldn't be happy Janis: none of us should Grace: we are Grace: that doesn't mean you have to ruin everything for yourself Grace: that you can't ever be happy Janis: I'm not ruining anything Janis: it's ruined Janis: nothing has changed Janis: so no, we shouldn't be happy Grace: Edie literally wanted you to be Grace: & we were 12 so much has changed Janis: like what Grace: like you letting someone in Grace: being happy even if you think you shouldn't Grace: we're talking now that wouldn't have ever happened Grace: if you hate me more than you did 4 years ago that's still change, babes Grace: you can't stand still for her Janis: I'm not going to pretend we're blessed to live to make more mistakes Grace: do better like everyone says they are gonna but don't Janis: no thanks Janis: I'm not righting all this family has done wrong Janis: that's what they think they can do Janis: Rio and Buster, and they've already failed Grace: I'm not even talking about them though Grace: just do better for you Grace: stay with him, feel something idk Janis: I don't know if I can Grace: I can't answer that for you Grace: do you wanna try or not? Janis: It's not that simple Grace: with that attitude no Janis: no, it just isn't Janis: you haven't been in love, have you? Grace: no Janis: well it's like Janis: sometimes what you want, and even what they think they want, might not be what's right for them Janis: and if you really loved them Janis: you'd want what was best for them, wouldn't you Grace: you are what's best for him though Grace: I've seen you together, wayyyy more than I wanted to Grace: & I lowkey stalked him before that so Janis: lowkey is debatable Grace: thank you for focusing in on the right thing OMG Janis: I'm not trying to be a cunt for once right now but you know Janis: I don't think you can say what's best for him Janis: me either, really Janis: idk Janis: I wish I did know then I'd just do it Grace: so let him say it Grace: be there to give him the chance like Janis: that's not me Janis: I can't be the one getting left Grace: & he can? Janis: no Grace: so do you love him enough to let him really hurt you or not Janis: its all stupid anyway Janis: we only just met Grace: I don't think that's the point, babes Janis: it is, even some of yours lasted longer than this and you weren't in love with them Grace: hello I'm fake Grace: & a hoe Janis: I didn't intend to be real Grace: he can't do fake that's not your fault hun Grace: his face is a dead giveaway like literally always Janis: you can take hints then Janis: just ignore 'em Janis: good to know Grace: I'm not brain damaged Grace: you just wish I were Janis: why would I want that Janis: sounds dead irritating, if anything Grace: cos otherwise I'm just stupid Grace: no excusing that Janis: you're not you're just infuriating Grace: cute but yeah I am Janis: nothing cute about it Janis: it's ugly all the shit you pretend Grace: duh it suits me then Janis: yeah yeah Grace: yeah we can pretend that's why no one wants me instead of what the truth is Janis: what's the truth then Grace: that I am just ugly Grace: so my personality might as well be Janis: nah Janis: truth is, you don't wanna die, like you said Janis: if that's what it takes for you to survive Grace: I'm too scared, like I am of a lot of things Grace: but like I also said, things change Janis: it's scary Grace: if I ever do it get mum's old oujia board out & I'll let you know what happens next Grace: like a liveblog Janis: oh great Janis: here's me thinking I'd get some peace and quiet, like Grace: EW what if heaven's like a really amazing nightclub vibe & they don't let me in Janis: what do you wanna go to heaven for Janis: it's like here without all the interesting bits Janis: at least hell is offering a bit of something new Grace: UM cos I'm not into bdsm unless the boy's like really fit Janis: you'll be fine then Janis: Lucifer is famously too hot for heaven, like Grace: oh yeah I totally forgot Janis: grand scheme of bible teachings, probably encouraged to be a bit quiet on that one Janis: black nan be buzzing Grace: catch me sinning really hard from now until I kms so he's into me Grace: sorry nan Janis: really gonna try and be his favourite sinner Janis: 😏 Grace: You'll love it cos I promised Rio no boys & she'll be really 😠😠😠 Grace: 💜me perdoe, irmã eu tenho que pecar💜 Janis: 😂 Janis: gonna point out that there are 7 other sins Janis: and those are just the deadly ones, like Grace: yeah but like Grace: it's the one that'll get his attention easiest Grace: boys are so quick to get jealous Janis: the devil has and always will be a gentleman, babe Janis: not a fuckboy Janis: rethink the tactic probs Grace: excuse me that gluttony & sloth aren't moods for an attractive corpse Janis: hello it's your soul you're taking Janis: not a zombie fuckfest Grace: UM I still need all my exes devastated at my funeral thanks Grace: don't let anyone touch my hair though or I will haunt you Janis: ha your plastic weave gonna be there long after the rest of you is dust Janis: as for your exes Janis: got to think numbers Grace: RUDE Janis: alright for you to say, you won't be handing out sausage rolls to however many identical unimpressed looking white boys Grace: neither will you Grace: a glance to check I'm in there & you can go, babes Janis: oh please Janis: can't make me go to this farce of a wedding but doubt I'm getting out of a funeral that easy Grace: I'll literally write in my will so bye bitch Janis: cute you think the dead's wishes are getting honoured around here Janis: whether she wanted us to be miserable or happy, we're all doing shit regardless Janis: can't say she wanted us to muddle through ad infinitum Grace: she still died we can't just move on ASAP Janis: why it's better to be team miserable Janis: a case can be argued even if we aren't committing enough Grace: I'm sure your bf will be down his face is always 😒 Janis: you fancy him not me Grace: ew Janis: mhmm Grace: you can go ahead and put that wayyyyy into past tense thanks so much Janis: 😏 Janis: convincing Grace: I literally only wanted to hook up with him Grace: not gonna do that now so Janis: that's all you do with any boy so Grace: duh Grace: he's only special to you Grace: no boy is to me Janis: don't be gay Janis: x2 Grace: don't be homophobic Grace: it's gross & retro Janis: whatever Janis: every gay I know is a twat Janis: tell me it ain't related Grace: same tbh Grace: 🤔🤔 Janis: doesn't help they're related to me and all but when I'm right, I'm right Grace: you don't know any others? Janis: dunno anyone do I Janis: if you cunts are boring, not like the ones at school are any better craic Grace: idk who you hang with now bitch Janis: 🙄 Janis: yeah decided I want loads of mates Grace: you got a bf so who knows Janis: told you that was a mistake Janis: accident, whatever Janis: not a habit Grace: you could be making friends by mistake Grace: obvs so likeable Janis: I'd rather not Grace: 👌 Janis: every twat's the same 'round here Grace: true Janis: nah no more people Janis: undecided what I'm doing as is Grace: it's a mood Janis: bollock Janis: you hate being alone, famously Grace: duh but idk what I'm doing Janis: hiding at Rio's rn Grace: thanks Grace: not what I meant tho Janis: then you'll have to be more specific Grace: whatever Grace: how are there no parties tonight??! ugh Janis: probably for the best Grace: it's really not Grace: school's gonna start soon Janis: astute Janis: you check the calendar Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Grace: do you know of any I don't? Janis: wouldn't tell you if I did Grace: that's so rude Janis: forgot why you've got a pity sofabed atm or what babe Grace: that wasn't a party & I wasn't gonna invite him to be my date tonight Janis: makes no odds, and dates a pretty loose term for 'you can frig me off in a random's lounge whilst their parents are out' as well Grace: it is shorter to type though so Janis: ha Janis: hilarious Grace: no just why I used it Janis: stick to babysitting Grace: I'm going out it'll just have to be somewhere else Janis: not doing this again Janis: got things i need to do now thanks to this awful fucking news Grace: not stopping you Janis: yeah right Grace: literally can't Janis: if you didn't want stopping, you wouldn't fucking tell me Janis: not after last time Janis: but I'm telling you, I ain't gonna be in any state so leave it out Grace: excuse me if for someone with no friends you have a lot of party invites Janis: called being likeable Janis: try it Grace: obvs & I obvs can't Janis: you don't try very hard Grace: LOL Grace: like I said, being fake is exhausting too babes Janis: well stop Janis: that's why no one likes you Janis: you're too much it weird everyone out Grace: I literally just said I can't Grace: but thanks Janis: how hard is it to shut your mouth for 5 minutes Grace: for you very Grace: so like idk why you're telling me to Janis: cos like idk I'm trying to help you! Grace: no you're not Grace: you're trying to get me to shut up cos you have so much to do Grace: you can just go Janis: sadly not Janis: waiting Grace: feel free to wait in silence Janis: why would I do that Grace: why not Grace: so easy Janis: nah Janis: I'm likeable, dying to hear what I've got to say Janis: too likeable to be off my phone rn so you'll have to deal with it Grace: 💜 Janis: I mean it, make sure one of them is sober Janis: I've got plans here Grace: I don't need you Grace: do what you want Janis: blatantly untrue Janis: made a massive twat of yourself last time Janis: which was, by the way, 2 days ago Janis: consider you have a problem Grace: & I'm so sure I will again but like it's my problem Janis: not though is it Janis: you checked out this entire convo Janis: affects all of us Grace: read back your own responses where everything is shit & we all deserve to suffer & nothing matters Janis: so sit and think about what you've done all alone Janis: that is suffering Grace: no thanks Janis: cool just ruin my night Janis: again Grace: it's not about you Janis: yeah it is Grace: no Janis: yep Janis: already ruined one plan so tah Janis: have to carry out this one after Grace: 👌👌 Janis: in a bit, cunt Grace: 👋 Janis: you really aren't subtle Janis: you know how easily I could forward this all to Rio, like Janis: think on Grace: then do it Grace: you love telling on me it's your thing now Janis: it is funny Janis: acting out doesn't really work if you keep telling before you do it Janis: not your thing by a long stretch Grace: I'm going out it's not a dramatic storm out Janis: yeah to get fingered 'cos you hate your ugly, stupid self, by your own admission Janis: so casual Janis: so not why the therapists are being booked Grace: literally so done talking to you now Grace: this convo has gone on forever Janis: it's cool it's forwarded Janis: 4G is amazing, idk where the fuck I am Janis: still, so fast Grace: wow Grace: I'll be impressed later like Janis: won't have the time Janis: though the drive back to mum and dad's is a fair while, yeah, you could use that time to really reflect Grace: I'll obvs make it for you, babes Janis: obvs Janis: fucking sad Grace: 💔 Janis: bet that felt like a moment Grace: mhmm Janis: n'awh Grace: yeah Janis: if you don't get some standards, honestly Grace: that's really working for you, yeah? Grace: it won't be any easier when he hates you than when he loves you, you know that Grace: get a grip Janis: like you'd know the first thing about it Grace: like you do either Grace: duh why you're terrified Janis: love a bit of projection Grace: okay sure Janis: not the one that freaks out when boys touch her Grace: so Grace: you're still gonna be alone anyway Janis: and? Grace: it doesn't matter if you push him away & if I'm getting pushed away by whatever lad Grace: even if you wanna use things I've said against me rn Janis: and you're the one that can't stand being alone Grace: oh sure keep pretending you love that but I'm so fake Janis: if I was fazed, I would've done something about it before now, what with how likeable I am to boys and girls Janis: no begging from my end Grace: you love him you literally admitted it Grace: stop Janis: and that matters because Grace: he loves you too Grace: you can't act like that doesn't matter Janis: sure can Janis: don't push me Grace: You're so stupid Janis: awh Janis: you are if you think there's any salvaging already Janis: like I could stick around with all that you threw at me Grace: me? Janis: yes, you Grace: how are you so delusional actually Janis: you couldn't want to tell me all about the stupid wedding Janis: you didn't have to Janis: mum and dad didn't for a fucking reason clearly Grace: you pushed me like you always do Janis: nah Janis: you dropped that like it was nothing Grace: you were being horrible for no reason like you always are Janis: the reason is you and your self-confessed shit personality but sure Janis: if it makes you feel better about the whole thing Grace: the reason was Mia but sure blame me again Janis: give a shit about Mia Janis: it was the wedding and you know it Janis: and you knew it and that's the only reason you said it Grace: I can't take it back now Janis: yeah well me either Grace: I didn't mean to just drop it on you like that Janis: whatever Janis: you want some attention, have at it 'cos I'm about to undo tonight Grace: why can't you stop Janis: why would I Grace: that's obvious Grace: undo whatever you've done to him instead Janis: how Janis: how the fuck do you reckon I can do that Grace: however he needs you to Grace: grow the fuck up & be sorry & try Janis: go to hell Janis: you're so fucked Janis: you care more about him than you do me what the hell is wrong with you Grace: I care about you Grace: for god's sake Janis: that's why you ain't once asked where I am or who I'm waiting for Janis: stop fucking talking about him Grace: cos I'm really scared what the answer is Grace: don't you understand that Janis: well it ain't Drew so my odds of leaving unmolested are slightly up Janis: though not his type, I don't reckon Grace: Every time you do this I freak out that it'll be the last time Grace: you won't come back cos either you don't want to or you can't Grace: if he's the only reason for you to stay then of course I want you to be with him Grace: I'm not sorry for that Janis: Well I can try for you but I don't think going catatonic and then bolting off is much of a turn-on Janis: 'specially not Janis: nah Janis: she kept this up for ages, good times, eh Grace: Talk to him Janis: gonna need to take this shit first Grace: Please don't Grace: I'm sorry for everything I've said and done literally ever okay Janis: yeah Janis: know you are Grace: Janis Janis: sorry alright Janis: and I never sent nothing to Rio so you can go Grace: I'll come to you Grace: wherever Grace: you don't have to Janis: I really meant it when I said idk where I am Grace: we can figure that out Grace: & I'll tell him it's all my fault, whatever you want Grace: he knows what a nightmare I am Janis: it's my fault Janis: this would've happened at some point yeah Grace: it's me, I'll fix it Grace: just give me a landmark to aim at first Janis: he was from Janis: Ballyfermot, yeah Janis: even worse than Tallaght, I remember she said Janis: don't come here I just need to Janis: aim back Grace: I can't just sit here like 🤞🤞 Grace: that's all this fam ever does Janis: shit Janis: this was really stupid he was horrible Grace: are you okay??? Janis: okay, I'll put my location on but I'll start moving, just meet me halfway Janis: one of Edie's old dealers/boyfriends Janis: said she had the right idea, yeah Grace: I can't even with that Grace: I'm in a car now so just move Janis: who is it Grace: just me obvs Grace: I'm not getting any of them involved Grace: I have an app for a reason like Janis: right no Janis: good Janis: just don't tell your uber driver I'm packing Grace: duh Grace: what are you gonna do with it though? Janis: can't just chuck it Janis: what if a dog eat it Janis: or a little kid Janis: kinda looked like some weird sour sweet you know Grace: find a really really gross bin Janis: or, could keep it and take it when he won't speak to me eh Grace: that's not funny Janis: I know Grace: I can't even breathe rn Janis: told you I couldn't pick you up Janis: tweaked driving is probably marginally better than drunk but still Grace: if he did something to you, you literally have to tell me Janis: he didn't, I swear Janis: he was just Janis: chatting about how he missed her and I wanted to ram his meth teeth down his throat Janis: bet he barely remembers her name Grace: that's horrible Grace: fuck Janis: he looked so old Janis: but I'm thinking it was just the drugs taking their toll, no way did she Janis: I hope not Grace: I don't wanna think about it but like Janis: I wanted to mug him, like Janis: show I ain't no hypocrite Janis: but I couldn't Grace: you can't do this again ever Janis: I don't wanna make promises I can't keep Janis: but like Janis: I don't even wanna take it, it smells and looks so Janis: toxic Grace: I will literally kill you if you die Janis: I don't know how much longer I can do this Janis: 4 years and I Grace: stop Grace: I'll help you Grace: I mean it, I'll do whatever you want Janis: I'm just so angry all the time Janis: and mean Grace: you can shout at me rn if you wanna, I'm already crying Grace: this driver has seen some shit Janis: people should be nice to you Janis: sorry your friends are dicks Grace: I should be nice to people Janis: fucking state of us Grace: idk how to be different Grace: it's been so long, before Edie even Grace: literally who am I? Janis: me either Janis: if I give up being angry Janis: give up her Janis: what have I got Grace: you never have to give her up Janis: I think I do a bit Janis: she couldn't make herself happy, I can't do it for myself and her Grace: she'd want you to be happy, I was so serious Grace: she was coming to see you Janis: us Grace: no Grace: she hated me & it was totally mutual Janis: but she loved you and that was too Janis: can't not Grace: if anything she was coming to ruin whatever tween celebrations I had planned cos that'd make you happy Janis: I can't remember anything about that day Grace: me either Grace: how can it not feel real when it's the realest thing that ever happened Janis: how did we find out Janis: who told us Janis: I don't know, genuinely Janis: not like when I pretend I've forgotten things Grace: I feel like it was dad but maybe I've made that up Grace: cos of after Grace: idk Grace: we should know that, shouldn't we? Janis: yeah Janis: that's the problem, right Janis: 9 kids, to tell Janis: sort of thing you want to do one on one but then some would know before ithers and how Janis: how would you do that 9 times Janis: he must've just, Janis: it must've just came out Grace: how would you even do it once Grace: I can't talk about anything ever Grace: literally not an exaggeration Janis: I told Jimmy she ran away for good Janis: not that she's dead, that we know where she's gone Grace: you don't owe him the story if you don't wanna tell it, babes Grace: everyone knows so much of our business Janis: their mum Janis: they don't know where she is Grace: like she just left? Janis: I think so Grace: how old was he? Grace: that's so sad Janis: I don't know, I don't ask he's just Janis: we've both said some stuff Janis: but Bobby is 6 so Grace: you wanna talk, can't relate but Janis: sometimes it feels almost right, like he'd get it Grace: yeah Grace: A lad once said to me 'you don't fuck like you've got a dead sister' like word for word that's what he said Grace: what does that even mean, you know Janis: people are so fucking weird Janis: does he mean you weren't sobbing at the time or that you weren't giving it your all like you've seen death so you know life now Grace: I didn't ask for clarification Grace: I just threw up and left Grace: but like it'd be nice if someone understood it, maybe Janis: nicer than that doesn't take much but Janis: maybe it's worse Janis: and maybe I'm a dick for comparing Grace: but maybe he wants someone to understand too Grace: it's really lonely getting left all the time Janis: Grace Grace: ?? Janis: are you sure you don't want him Grace: EW Janis: you'd be much nicer Grace: no I wouldn't Janis: well you wouldn't run Grace: yeah I would Grace: just not like physically cos 👠 Janis: if he fucks Mia I'll cry I think Janis: then kill her Grace: he would never!!! Grace: he hates her and she's livid about it Grace: like same but I'm relieved Janis: it's only been a few hours right Janis: maybe I can Janis: oh God, I'll have to explain the entire Buster and Rio saga if I even want to explain tonight Grace: I'll drop you off if I ever get there Janis: hope your driver isn't the kidnap kind Grace: Don't that would be the perfect end to my evening Grace: he lives by nan & grandad, right? maybe I'll go there Janis: k but you'll have to share the bed if he won't let me in Grace: lowkey would have to give you the bed cos it's my fault so 🤞🤞 he does Grace: so over sofas OMG Janis: should make Saint swap you Janis: he'd fall for it Grace: my back hurts so much okay I haven't done yoga since I was like 8 Janis: should join mother on the lawn Grace: 😱😱😱 Grace: mhmmm LIVING for any direct comparisons between me & her Janis: defs gonna slutshame her into dressing her age Grace: ughhhh Grace: how could you ever sit him down for dinner with them Janis: you know, take the piss out of them relentlessly behind their back Janis: feel him up a bit under the table, standard Grace: thanks for that mental 📷 I didn't want or need, hun Janis: soz Grace: he's hot but like you're also there so Grace: awks Janis: I won't take offense Janis: though my ego is wounded Grace: nbd I just haven't been a hoe for a while & that's obvs everything I am rn Janis: didn't you Janis: fair boy Grace: the one who left or the one who you kept blowing up my phone every sec I was with Grace: cos either way no Janis: oh Janis: well, doubt you're missing much on either score Grace: I know exactly what I'm missing with my ex thanks Grace: & I don't hook up with 19 year olds who lie to me Janis: not good Grace: like you said, this town is full of the same kind of people Janis: how is it so crap Janis: with some lads Janis: like Grace: they don't care Grace: I've spent hours memorising every clip they like but there's no getting any of the same back Janis: relatable but still Janis: felt more getting a checkup at the drs Grace: you have to put it in for most of them cos they don't even understand the layout but they'll still ask you if it was good Grace: imagine being that confident Janis: I am Janis: but not gay Janis: soz ladies Grace: 💔 Janis: don't you 💔 weirdo Grace: it's for the one hot white boy you stole by being hetero so Janis: I offered and you ew'd Janis: let the record show Grace: shut up Janis: he's probably so single now Grace: STOP Grace: it's been like a hour or something Janis: I ran away Janis: he's gonna be so Grace: Babe Grace: just make him understand Janis: no pressure Grace: well duh Grace: there's a reason I don't let boys that close to me Janis: you're saying it like I don't know Janis: not my first rodeo Janis: it just happened Grace: you know what you did, that's more than any ex I've ever had Janis: well Janis: done now Grace: Yeah Janis: should I wait or tell him I'm alright now on here Grace: I'd wanna know you were okay but you know him Grace: is it better to just show up? Janis: I think he'd wanna know too but like Janis: ugh fuck it Janis: wish me luck Grace: obvs