#even if i am a little out of the ordinary | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

milksnake-tea · 2 days

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❀ ˎˊ- prompt: robin notices her brother's little (huge) crush on you. ❀ ˎˊ- sunday x gn!reader ❀ ˎˊ- wc: 829 ❀ ˎˊ- warnings: maybe ??? ooc sunday idk sunday doesnt exactly have smitten moments ❀ ˎˊ- a/n: wrote this to calm the voices because this man is rotating in my brain rent free during exam week (i wrote this before finishing the 2.2 quest please dont attack me i am just a girl) ❀ ˎˊ- img credits

They're quivering again.

The first time, Robin convinces herself that she must’ve imagined it. She brushes it off and continues her conversation with her brother - detailing all of the things she’d seen during her tour throughout the cosmos while he listens patiently, as he always has.

But then comes a second, and a third, and then a fourth time, and Robin knows that she isn’t hallucinating from a lack of sleep.

It doesn’t help that Sunday’s eyes aren’t exactly focused either. Usually, they’re soft and attentive, reflecting how eagerly he listens to her stories. But today, they’re distracted - honed in on something in the distance as if caught in a daze. And those wings of his - fluttering ever so slightly, a tell-tale sign that has Robin smiling knowingly.

“Brother?” she says softly. When that doesn’t work, she gently snaps her fingers before his face.

Instantly Sunday startles, blinking rapidly before his attention returns to Robin and he settles back into his serene state. Robin giggles at him, and Sunday merely rolls his eyes playfully in return.

“Sorry about that,” Sunday says sheepishly, coughing into his fist. “With the Charmony Festival approaching, I’m afraid my mind has been rather… preoccupied.”

Ah, yes, the Charmony Festival - a convenient excuse, Robin thinks amusedly. But for her brother’s sake, she plays along.

“You really should rest, brother,” she lightly chides him, “even if you are the Oak Family head, all this stress isn’t good for you.”

Sunday smiles warmly. “Yes, of course.”

They both know he isn’t going to listen (stubbornness runs in the family), but at least Robin can’t say she didn’t try.

Her brother’s gaze wanders again, and his wings follow suit. Robin almost sighs in exasperation at how obvious Sunday is being. Suddenly, she’s grateful that they were the only Halovians in Penacony with wings - Xipe knows the embarrassment they’d face if someone caught on.

As discreetly as possible, she sneaks a peak behind her to follow Sunday’s gaze and pinpoint the source of his distraction.

She doesn’t find much, just a few Dreamchasers talking amongst themselves - a common sight in Golden Hour. They aren’t doing anything out of the ordinary, simply eating and enjoying the sights as any normal tourist would. Just as she’s about to question Sunday, her gaze lands on you.

You weren’t doing anything special, no, but something about the way you carried yourself and talked with the people around you made you stand out, as if a ring of light had enshrouded you like a halo. There was no hostility nor malice that Robin could discern in your features, only pure joy and warmth that reminded her of a fireplace.

If she had to describe you in one word, it would be freedom.

“Who are they?” she whispers, leaning closer to Sunday so that he can hear her. Sunday flinches, heat rising to his face as he realizes he’s been caught.

“N-No one, really,” he hastens to deter her. “Just another Dreamchaser, one of the Nameless who came to Penacony on vacation.”

“Really?” Robin teases, fully facing him now. “They don’t look like ‘just another Dreamschaser’ to me.”

She’s never seen her brother so nervous. “…And what makes you say that?”

Robin daintily points to one of her wings, fighting back her laughter as the realization slowly dawns on Sunday. “You were fluttering, brother.”

Within the blink of an eye, Sunday’s skin burns bright red. He buries his face in his hand with a groan, and Robin bursts out laughing, soft giggles escaping her as Sunday’s wings, his traitors, come to shield his face from the embarrassment.

“It’s okay,” she finally manages out. “I’m glad you’ve found someone you like that much.”

“That’s not-” Sunday sighs in defeat, realizing that any argument was futile. Pinching his nose, he tries to salvage the situation with a deep breath. “Putting that aside, what were you saying about Asdana?”

Robin plants her hands on her hips, a mischievous gleam in her eye. “Don’t try to change the subject, Sunday.”

“No, I’m sure you’ve more interesting stories -” Sunday tries to prattle on - anything to escape this conversation. Robin has half a mind to pinch his cheek until he caves, but she doesn’t have to.

In the midst of his pitiful attempts to turn the conversation topic elsewhere, Sunday’s gaze betrays him and wanders to you again - only this time, you’re looking at him first. Your eyes meet for a second, and you offer him a friendly smile and wave.

And that’s all it takes for him to melt.

Robin watches, entertained, as Sunday waves back, his wings now flapping in delight at the brief interaction. His smile is relaxed now, and his eyes are drowning in something that Robin can only describe as lovesickness.

She lets out a loud sigh, fondly shaking her head as she looks at her brother.

There’s no doubt in her heart now - he’s smitten.

reblogs w comments are appreciated !!

tags: @sh0jun, @themoderatelyawesomeninja, @xphantasmagoriax, @rainswept, @lucensei

@akutasoda @naraven

#—stellaronhvnters.#honkai star rail #honkai star rail x reader #hsr #hsr x reader #sunday #hsr sunday #sunday hsr #hsr sunday x reader #sunday hsr x reader #sunday honkai star rail #honkai star rail sunday #x reader #reader insert #y/n #archives 🏵️

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sunlighthroughthe-ashes · 2 days

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this episode was slightly clunky in places, but let me tell you what i loved.

i ADORED the scenes of them alone in baek inhyuk's house — one of the best qualities of a well-made k-drama is how beautifully it can capture the holiness of commonplace events — the "precious intimacy of ordinary things." sunjae drying sol's hair for her is an excellent example — so much love in such a small gesture.

sunjae's ridiculous attempts to get into the guest-room with sol were BEYOND adorable — it's also such a nice touch by the writers to show that despite the otherworldliness and rarity of his love for sol, sunjae is still a 20-year old boy at heart. he does stupid (albeit unbelievably cute) things. and that's okay. that makes him even more endearing.

the entire segment when they're talking in the guest-room while cuddling was heart-touching. sunjae wishing that she never has to go back, that tomorrow never arrives, sol committing his sleeping face to memory because she knows she's going to pretend to leave the next morning. she's going to have to let him go. there's this japanese phrase that's very popular: "mono no aware —" that describes these scenes perfectly. it means the bittersweet beauty of transience.

the moment is full of it — the lovely ache of passing time — because of course tomorrow arrives. it has to. but that doesn't make the memories matter any less, or hold less weight.

it's like the cherry blossoms sunjae sees wilting earlier in the episode — they may bloom only for a moment, but the petals pinken in the mind for months after; still fresh.

that's the melancholy charm of their love.

my heart went out to sol during this episode. she looked happiness in the face and decided to give up even the little time she had left with it, just to save sunjae. she's risking life and limb to protect him, (again), only to have her actions further compound their fate.

greek tragedies (and shakespearean plays) operate on the same principle — it is often the core aspect of your personality, and the best of your intentions; that leads you down the dark road of your destiny. (eg: oedipus, hamlet, etc). in sol's case, this is the selflessness of her love for sunjae, and vice versa. they both spent this episode trying their level best to protect each other. it's not going to end well. (but since this was marketed as a rom-com, i'm hoping the actual ending of the show will be happy.)

also, the way byeon woo-seok's face just crumples when sol runs off the train? the mute agony in his eyes — how his expression just splinters into pieces? it's a masterclass in acting. he genuinely deserves an award for this role.

i am not going to talk about the promo because i have been traumatized enough. i will see you all next monday.

#lovely runner #byeon woo seok #kdrama #kim hye yoon #tvn drama #tvn lovely runner #kdrama lover #tvn #fantasy kdrama #rom com kdrama

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girlfriendsofthegalaxy · 2 days

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tuesday again 5/14/2024

googled "sample bon mot" in a fit of desperation, considered asking chatgpt to generate me some for 0.2 seconds before the visceral BLEUGH reaction plus remembered that every query is like pouring a 16oz water bottle out on the ground, and figured this series of events would be a better intro than anything else i could come up with

listening

miya folick's Pet Body was off last week's spotify rec playlist. i had liked some individual songs by miya folick (singer/songwriter/alt/indie/dance/electronica) but now i gotta really dive into her discography-- this particular very peppy and upbeat song with dire lyrics is really clicking with me lately as my body overreacts to texas pollen and engages in other known misbehaviors.

the chorus, my god

Proper care and feeding for my pet body

and this verse

I'm just a brain with a pet body Out for a walk until I croak I'm just an ordinary subject In an ordinary book

as my mother used to say, i'm real fuckin sick and tired of being sick and tired!!!

reading

ough i need to vacuum. i picked up Mrs Vargas and the Dead Naturalist by Kathleen Alcalá for a dollar last summer bc 0) killer title 1) it was a dollar 2) cool cover 3) autographed 4) endorsed by le guin.

kind of fascinating as an object: weird little lesbian (?) boutique press that's still around, idk ive ever seen a notice about steps they took to ensure the longevity of the physical book before?

i find myself bouncing off latin and south american magical realism a lot bc i am not in those authors’ intended audiences/i do not have the background to fully appreciate them. i have a bachelors of science. and that’s fine bc that’s the point! this is one of the very few times post-college where i caught myself thinking “man i gotta find a class to take about this”.

even if i do not understand the wider cultural context or the real-life figures she obliquely references in many of these short stories (i am convinced the bird-voiced singer is based on a real singer), i do appreciate alcalá’s craft: true short stories, she makes her point and then ends it. the twist in Reading the Road specifically— woof that’s gonna stick with me for a bit. a perfect little o henry twist of the knife. i wanted so badly to link this specific short story but apparently nobody has used it to teach anything and the book itself is not widely available/on the internet archive/etc. u will have to find this story of a roadside fortune teller (who is current on all her business permits) and one day's fortune telling, by yourself perhaps through your library

watching

youtube

the prisoner, the seventeen episode british sixties tv cult classic. let's yoink the description from wikipedia.

The Prisoner is a British television series created by Patrick McGoohan, with possible contributions from George Markstein.[2] McGoohan portrays Number Six, an unnamed British intelligence agent who is abducted and imprisoned in a mysterious coastal village after resigning from his position.[3] The allegorical plotlines of the series contain elements of science fiction, psychological drama, and spy fiction.

number six shares a lot of traits with my cat philip marlowe, as they are both hell fucking bent on escaping and all attempts to restrain them just sort of train them to be better at the next attempt? as one might expect from a heavily allegorical sixties show, kind of heavy emotional going so im watching an episode every day or two.

why am i watching this? it's free on my library streaming service (and tubi), and i don't have a lot going on. i love one-season cancelled shows, i love Dad Media, unfortunately i was a navy brat and i do love some cloak and dagger shit. i LOOOOVE a fucked up little town and bureaucracy-as-cudgel. i actually came across this when i wishlisted the game We Happy Few back in 2018, another entry in the "creepy little british towns" genre. have yet to play it

playing

the cosmology and general backstory of genshin is convoluted as hell (The Gods are real and live in the sky, but some lowercase-g gods are also rulers of the seven nations in-game) but they have been foreshadowing a grand showdown since the very beginning of the game. one player character cannot de- or re-stablize so many regions and engage in so many power struggles without someone taking notice.

i did NOT, however, expect one of the regional god-rulers (purple) to start planning for this divine war in a side cutscene in a seasonal event. a seasonal event around rock n roll rhythm games. absolutely devastated i missed the pink fox lady's rerun right after i had to give my work laptop back and before i got the PC fixed. this game will not run on my iphone 12 for love or money

making

bit of a depression hovel situation going on. we are slowly rolling that back tho. finally met my landlord during the HVAC replacement debacle, he said that he bought this apartment in 2009, lived here for ten years, and then his parents lived here for a couple years. i am the first non-family tenant, i think. all of the appliances and fixtures are from 2009. i think the fridge will be the next to go. ANYWAY. i asked him what the deal was with the lack of bathroom vents and HE said when he had an air conditioner put in in 2009 the HVAC guy then assured him he only needed the HVAC vents and closed up the actual vents. which is a load of shit. i am not really excited to live here for another year but i really super can't afford to move and finding an apartment in houston the first time was such a goddamn nightmare. i cannot do three years tho. hopefully something will have changed by august 2025.

i have also, through a special cashback bonus reward on my credit card, a sale, a gift card, and cashing in more cashback money, acquired a cat tree for philip. modeled here by mackie bc we did room swapping again as i was writing this. i cannot be bothered to install curtain tiebacks or properly fold anything, as you can see below

#tuesday again #tuesday again no problem

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wis-art · 1 year

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i thought lesbians would think I'm an imposter or something because i have a boyfriend and i dont exactly look like a girl most of the time, turns out they love me and support me and what i do and appreciate my art.

#i fell in love with a girl and then he transed and now i love my man #idk..........#i just appreciate being welcomed #and included #even if i am a little out of the ordinary #idk i told my bf i think i might just be a lesbian and he was like #cool #and then it kinda just clicked in a way #i was like #kinda giddy #cause you know technically i guess i would count as bisexual because i do think men are attractive too #but it just really doesnt feel right #like if i talk about myself and i say i am a lesbian with a boyfriend i just go like WOAAHWH #nothing wrong with bisexual and i think it is very much under represented and i am a little guilty of that myself #but you know #i just feel so very much right #when i can call myself a lesbian #and i realized that and maybe that's why i kept drawing girls in love all the time #maybe it's just the yearning to say something i am but i was a little intimidated #i didnt want to dissappoint my boyfriend or anger anyone because i dont perfectly fit a label #i am a lot more comfortable now

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turtleblogatlast · 2 months

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Something I’ve been thinking about lately is that small moment in “Air Turtle” where immediately after the Daves lose yet another game, Leo says how sorry he is and how he’s doing his best as the mascot. This moment is so short but it’s honestly jam-packed with a whole heap of characterization.

His need to apologize for things clearly not his fault - especially when it feels like he messes up the job he was given despite doing the best he can (the phrase “it’s not about you” takes a new meaning when this is one of the lessons to be learned from that - that he is not always solely responsible for things going wrong), his need to save face and make a connection with an older adult man in his life (something he consistently does throughout the series - he’s got a few daddy issues, always collecting potential father figures, it’s no wonder he jumps at the bit to keep rapport), and the way he sounds and looks and the words he chooses really pushes how he is just a kid (“Mr. the Dunk, I’m so sorry”).

Like I know it’s a one off moment that doesn’t truly mean much, but when put against the rest of the series it works really well with the rest of Leo’s established character and helps in solidifying later concepts as well.

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt leo #rise leo #rottmnt headcanons #am I looking too much into things? almost assuredly yes #I actually appreciate how tim immediately goes ‘it’s not your fault’ as well? like he could’ve just blamed this 15/16 year old but he didn’t #but yeah this moment got to me a little mainly because it made me realize that Leo…DOES take responsibility for things a lot #he messes up a ton yeah but he says sorry at a pretty consistent rate #and y’know thinking about it #THIS IS TINFOIL HAT TERRITORY BE WARNED #he’s mentioned being betrayed by his brothers before - I wonder if it was something as simple as taking the fall for like #breaking something of Splinters or whatever #point is it wouldn’t be out of the ordinary for him to get the full blame for something only partially his fault #or not his fault at all in some cases #like in bug busters where Raph gets mad at Leo for not getting captured with them #(I understand Raph’s mindset here a ton - Raph’s the leader and he’s likely lashing out so I don’t blame the poor kid)#but this plus the moment at the beginning of the movie #where only Leo is reprimanded despite Mikey and Donnie having full autonomy to join the fun pizza stacking #make no mistake this is not at all a diss on everyone else!!! it’s just something I noticed #I think that “it’s not about you” doesn’t just pertain to being arrogant and wanting the spotlight #I think it’s also about how responsibility is meant to be shared #and like #Leo DOES mess up a lot! so he’s honestly probably used to having the blame because it is often at least somewhat warranted #he’s specifically described as being good at apologizing after all #tldr: Leo messes up a lot of the time so he is very used to blame and attention both good and bad #even when the full blame should not be solely on his shoulders

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pyro-madder · 4 months

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was there confirmation from the devs that gascoigne has two daughters or did we all take the older one's words at face value when everything else in the game points otherwise

#sort of rant but it genuinely makes me crazy to see it in lore vids and shit. others must have said it before but #the evil ribbon monologue is the least suspicious part #why wouldn't the little one mention her at all #why would a young girl be out by herself on the evening of a hunt and how would she survive throughout half the plot #viola wouldn't have let her go out by herself. and if she left after viola. again. WHY wouldn't the little sister mention it #fromsoft doesn't just /forget/ to mention things (most of the time...)#and then she spawns like a flower... under the blood moon... when there's not a single soul left in central yharnam ??#sure i'll buy it. come on guys. guys /i am dragged offstage by security #don't get me wrong tho if she's still an ordinary girl she deserves better than to die down a ladder lmao #but if i went the extra mile i'd make her a beast in disguise like the beggar. little girls get to have fun and be evil. as a treat #sorry i'm having. a day

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keeps-ache · 1 day

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mm i Neeed to go the beach

#just me hi #wauhuhh !#something about just drifting around in water that i am slightly scared of that really makes my brain whir happily lol :>#i am slightly scared of it for two major reasons: 1) fish. lord the fish why are they so scary 2) sometimes i think i'll drown and they jus #won't find the body. which is less rational than the fish so that's why fish is my number 1 fear at all times lmao #/i think out of all the animals on the planet i am the most scared of ordinary fish. not even the deep sea stuff hfbshv #cuz look they're so far down there you Have to assume they look funked. and also they prolly don't like human meat. so it's cool #but regular fish?? some of them eat birds. they eat birds dude. what would they do to me if they knew how to use harpoons??#also they for SURE eat corpses so we loop back to fear no. 2 really just being fear no. 1 hbfhs #/see i'm not even that scared of the animals my parents are determined on exploding. like man if i get eaten that was prolly bound #to happen anyway. i Know how that goes. i know what mauling is lol #i am the only person in this house who will walk around outside on a moonless light w/ no flashlight because if i was sposed to be dead i #can guaranteE there are much better opportunities. funnier ones‚ too #/just looked it up bobcats are SHY little guys. they are just shy babies. except for when they have rabies :)#shy rabies babies <3 #/anyway back to the fish. i don't like how there are some that specifically like to eat human skin. mmm no i have never liked that ever not #one little bit. makes my skin crawl hghfsh #i don't care what it does or can do that is NOT cool lil dude ;w;#/hang on i'm googling 'weirdest things fish eat' because i want to scare myself i guess hbfhvbsf :'3 #they're only showing me weird fish!!! no !! tell me about a fish that's living exclusively off of plastics!! or car tires !! come on !!!#these guys are just funky looking. and just Kinda funky looking. though this humphead guy is funny lol :)#he looks scary but with a charm that i can't deny #his forehead. and mouf. this guy is awesome #and of course he's endangered because the world is exploding. but it's so cool he exists :D #//anyway fish are scary. and miss humphead is Huge so goofiness aside he's also scary hhfbvs #also why do some of those motherfunkers swim close to shore and bite at you. those guys suck so bad #that's only happened to me so many times but enough for me to have a fear that has lasted for over half a decade lmao #//and anywho i'm running out of tag space lol :)#we're going ot the park!! i'm going to skate :DD !!#i wanna get good at my old stuff again hfsh - so bye! bye !! toodles !!!

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trans-cuchulainn · 1 year

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everybody should have free and equal access to information and art, and also the people who make that art should be able to earn a fair living. both of these things should happen. unfortunately, we live in a world where neither of them happens. moreover we live in a world where they are seen as oppositional forces where to favour one is to deny the other. but it is not the fault of either the producers or the consumers that these truths haven't already been reconciled, it's a) the middlemen who profit from the labour of both sides, and b) the system as a whole that makes living something to be sweated and bled for and not something we can simply do. furthermore it is deeply unfortunate that action against those middlemen will always hurt first the producers of that art and information, because rather than see their profits shrink, the middlemen will only extract more labour for less money. and this will not be a victory for the consumer in the long run, but if the alternative is for the profit to grow at the cost to the consumer, who would blame the consumer for taking the temporary victory? and the system cannot be allowed to continue to exist in the state that it is, and sometimes those middlemen are making choices that do harm. so how do you change it, if you don't want to hurt the people at the bottom who have no power over the people at the top? can it be changed? or will it always be a case of pitting the producer against the consumer as though that was ever the fight to be won in the first place?

#it is so so frustrating that it is never the ceos and executives and boards and whatever that suffer from boycotts and the like #their salaries will not even take a hit #but the underpaid junior employees at the bottom will be let go #and the ones just above them will work five years on a sub living wage for no promotion #and the freelancers who are the reason the industry exists will be ground down and exploited just a little more #while somebody at the top who produces nothing of value pockets all the money #and if the consumer walks away and goes elsewhere... they'll just take it out of somebody else's pocket instead #how do you resist in a world that is built like this #how can anything get better when the only way to show displeasure with a company is to fuck ordinary people over #i am so goddamn tired of living under capitalism

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misskriemhilds · 5 months

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i have since finished the metamorphosis but the take i'm the most interested in and feel like i want to find more discussion about is how it's an inherently jewish story

#lucia reads: the metamorphosis #...absolutely haunting allegory for antisemitism in post ww1 attitudes tbh #because one second you're an ordinary citizen #and the next second even the gentiles who are your neighbors or friends #regard you as little more than vermin to crush under their shoes #maybe they'll tolerate your jewishness even if you don't express it #but in the end at least some of those people are going to crack and want to see you get out at best or dead at worst #i'm sure there are academic papers out there analyzing this especially in the context of kafka himself being jewish #i just have to seek them out...#fyi. i am jewish so personally: i love finding depressing as hell catharsis for jewish diaspora in my old 1910s literature :)

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gayfranzkafka · 10 months

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(insane post incoming) okay i've been a taylor swift re-recordings hater since the beginning but the Speak Now re-recording is making me INSANE i think it's partially just that i'm having a weird time emotionally anyway but like "Timeless" made me TEAR UP like bro WHAT like something about it being soooo essentially of that era but new like the novelty of it BONKED me over the head with a reminder of what it felt like to hear all those songs off Speak Now for the first time when i just had this IDEA of what love was & hadn't actually experienced it yet (& wouldn't for many years!!) like way before i even knew i was a lesbian just listening to taylor sing "enchanted" alone in my bedroom wondering who the guy she was singing about was & if she ever saw him again (because i was #blessed to not have internet access and therefor not know it was the dude from owl city she was singing about alsdfhaklsdhfasdh) & i remember just pouring through the little lyric booklet & its pictures & intro & mostly it was just me & the music & this picture of her in a ballgown in my head & this made up but hopeful romantic idea of what love is and like S C R E A M

#anyway i'm doing fine in case you're wondering #not to overshare but i think it's like. also because in my relationship rn we are like having to work through some things & like not even #anything out of the ordinary like just compatibility stuff that comes up for any longterm couple but we started talking about like spending #the rest of our lives together in very hypothetical way but still like really early in the relationship & now my gf is more like 'okay i #do really want to date you but i want to focus on working through these things & it feels overwhelming to talk about the longterm future rn #like not even in a way where i don't trust them & us to work through this but i'm just like. at the end of the day i guess i AM a romantic #& do have this idealized version of love that i believe in like i think that can be a bad thing (part of what kept me with my abusive hs ex #& i think it can also be a strength like i think it's NICE that i can still so clearly see & believe in a future with my gf even when we ar #working through hard stuff & when they feel overwhelmed but like. it's like is that DUMB or just like. i feel my feelings in a really inten #*intense way that i DO think is (sigh) like taylor a LITTLE BIT & it's like oh what does it mean for other people to not necessarily share #my same relationship to love like even the people you love will have a different relationship to love than you if that makes sense which li #*like duh but is also feeling like a mindfuck rn ANYWAY in conclusion i don't think my feelings are REALLY just about speak now but i DO #also think Speak Now WAS this formative text for me & represents/influenced the way i relate to love and like. SIGH. well i am thinking #about it. and i DID listen to 'timeless' on repeat & feel so emotional over it i literally felt like i was going to throw up <3 #and it's objectively like not even THAT good of a song asdlfjashdfasdfahsdf #anyway hiiiii how is everyone

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the-dragonlich · 2 years

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There is a book I am desperately trying to think of and I am so pissed I forgot both the name and the author because it was one of the books that I read that left a genuine impress on me as a kid

#ramblings #I’m not exactly sure if I could say what sort of impact it had on me but I do feel it was of the things that shaped #me in some way or another #both because it was a out of my ordinary anthropomorphic animal books #and in general was just one of the very few contemporary books I read because I mostly stuck to fantasy #I’m not sure if I’m ever actually going to find it again because the records of me ordering it from the library lost on me at this point #it was like at least 7 years ago so not surprising #I really wish I had the focus to fucking read anymore in general #I fucking loved reading so much as a kid but now I can barely bring myself to finish a page even though I am interested in the premise #is it just ADHD bs and even though I’m interested I’m not interested enough to give the brain enough dopamine #I really need to get medicated maybe then I could start doing at least a chapter a day and ease myself into it #like when I first started reading big chapter books as a little kid #maybe I should try reading the Reckless series again because looking back on it that series was likely aimed at adults #and little 12 year old me got a hold of it because it was in the fantasy genre #where was going with this?#⬅️ bitch who is unmedicated

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cactus-chowder · 2 years

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#starting every workday by watching 5-10 minutes of Dune 2021 #as a reward for waking up & an encouragement to start the day even tho its early #it's day 4 of this & I'm up to the gom jabbar scene #I heard that the director had Big Opinions about how the only and correct way to watch the movie was like #on imax and with other ppl or something #so that kind of got me curious like. what's the worst/best way to watch this movie #I watched it in theaters twice when it came out & I think one of the most impactful things about the experience was the *scarcity*#like in a world of instant gratification entertainment and screens... you have to pay money to go to the special place to get this one #and it was so regal and commanding and dramatic! and all of that lived at the special place you couldn't access casually #(after a few years of pandemic a movie theater becomes just a little strange and new)#I got the dvd a few months ago but never had time to watch it #so it never really got to become 'ordinary' yet #and now I've created an artificial scarcity with rules #the special place where the movie lives is in the morning before work (an otherwise hostile and unfriendly location in space & time)#Denis I loved your art. I loved it & I am eating it.#a sincere yet contrarian expression of respect

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echoekhi · 6 months

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I’m Declaring War Against “What If” Videos: Project Copy-Knight

What Are “What If” Videos?

These videos follow a common recipe: A narrator, given a fandom (usually anime ones like My Hero Academia and Naruto), explores an alternative timeline where something is different. Maybe the main character has extra powers, maybe a key plot point goes differently. They then go on and make up a whole new story, detailing the conflicts and romance between characters, much like an ordinary fanfic.

Except, they are fanfics. Actual fanfics, pulled off AO3, FFN and Wattpad, given a different title, with random thumbnail and background images added to them, narrated by computer text-to-speech synthesizers.

They are very easy to make: pick a fanfic, copy all the text into a text-to-speech generator, mix the resulting audio file with some generic art from the fandom as the background, give it a snappy title like “What if Deku had the Power of Ten Rings”, photoshop an attention-grabbing thumbnail, dump it onto YouTube and get thousands of views.

In fact, the process is so straightforward and requires so little effort, it’s pretty clear some of these channels have automated pipelines to pump these out en-masse. They don’t bother with asking the fic authors for permission. Sometimes they don’t even bother with putting the fic’s link in the description or crediting the author. These content-farms then monetise these videos, so they get a cut from YouTube’s ads.

In short, an industry has emerged from the systematic copyright theft of fanfiction, for profit.

Project Copy-Knight

Since the adversaries almost certainly have automated systems set up for this, the only realistic countermeasure is with another automated system. Identifying fanfics manually by listening to the videos and searching them up with tags is just too slow and impractical.

And so, I came up with a simple automated pipeline to identify the original authors of “What If” videos.

It would go download these videos, run speech recognition on it, search the text through a database full of AO3 fics, and identify which work it came from. After manual confirmation, the original authors will be notified that their works have been subject to copyright theft, and instructions provided on how to DMCA-strike the channel out of existence.

I built a prototype over the weekend, and it works surprisingly well:

On a randomly-selected YouTube channel (in this case Infinite Paradox Fanfic), the toolchain was able to identify the origin of half of the content. The raw output, after manual verification, turned out to be extremely accurate. The time taken to identify the source of a video was about 5 minutes, most of those were spent running Whisper, and the actual full-text-search query and Levenshtein analysis was less than 5 seconds.

The other videos probably came from fanfiction websites other than AO3, like fanfiction.net or Wattpad. As I do not have access to archives of those websites, I cannot identify the other ones, but they are almost certainly not original.

Armed with this fantastic proof-of-concept, I’m officially declaring war against “What If” videos. The mission statement of Project Copy-Knight will be the elimination of “What If” videos based on the theft of AO3 content on YouTube.

I Need Your Help

I am acutely aware that I cannot accomplish this on my own. There are many moving parts in this system that simply cannot be completely automated – like the selection of YouTube channels to feed into the toolchain, the manual verification step to prevent false-positives being sent to authors, the reaching-out to authors who have comments disabled, etc, etc.

So, if you are interested in helping to defend fanworks, or just want to have a chat or ask about the technical details of the toolchain, please consider joining my Discord server. I could really use your help.

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See full blog article and acknowledgements here: https://echoekhi.com/2023/11/25/project-copy-knight/

#ao3 #fanfic #copyknight #theft #copyright

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scientia-rex · 2 months

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One of my patients used to be a Big Deal Specialist in the city and you can just TELL he’s SEETHING that no one out here is even qualified to understand what he did, much less how important he was. He’s also terrified of death. It’s both annoying and really sad. Like, sir, I hate to break it to you, but no amount of knowledge will protect you from the ravages of time. It’s a special kind of hell to know the stages of various fatal diseases intimately. What is it going to feel like when it’s my turn? How do doctors want to die? Suddenly, quietly. Slip away painlessly in my sleep. But how likely is that? Not very. More likely I’ll get cardiovascular disease or cancer, the greatest killers of our time.

He was so afraid of cancer he had an organ that wasn’t cancerous removed just in case. He talks down to me as if I’m his student, and who knows? Maybe I was. He was in the same city as me, and they were forever dragging Big Name Doctors in to teach us things. Maybe I learned how to elicit Achilles tendon reflexes from him.

But mostly I find myself a little scornful. Who lives without the shadow of death? Who doesn’t think about death all the time? When you die, life is a round thing, finished and whole. What will your life look like when God holds it in the palm of his hand?

Also don’t fucking call me by my first name unless I’ve specifically said you can. I don’t GIVE that permission to patients, except for my mentally ill trans and queer patients. If I wanted to be disrespected by an older man I would have married young.

You do not have time. This important doctor who based his whole life around his importance lived as rich and full a life as anyone. And now he’s clinging to it, leaving fingernail marks on the walls on his way out. No one has time. There will be a moment when you’re dying when you think, I would give anything I have to be back in that moment. Any ordinary moment. Taking the dogs out to go potty. Browsing at the grocery store. When you’re being crucified on a hospital bed, dying and aware of it through the morphine, you would give anything you ever possessed to go back and have one more agony-free afternoon. Sit on a curb or a stoop. Walk through a park. Hug your spouse. These tiny fragmentary moments that we are constantly sliding through, tobogganing past at high speeds, these are what will be our life when our life is over.

I am accountable to that self. To the dying me. What did I do with this gift and curse? I don’t believe in God, but I know that I will die, and I have watched enough dying people by now to know the kinds of things I’ll think about. I want to make that me proud of what I’ve done and how I’ve spent my life. She will be a harder judge than God, and I want her to look at this one little life and think, yes. I did what I meant to.

#death cw

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moominsuki · 26 days

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✎ᝰ BAKUGOU KATSUKI ; — 11:36 AM OR when you’re needy and he’s ready to help you. doesn’t mean he won’t have some of his own fun while doing it. (birthday special)

࿄ ! warnings - major nsfw. squirting. f!reader. kind of dubcon but not really. / note. hey… how y’all doing! i have no excuses this time lol. i also can’t promise i will be back! i couldn’t let this brew in my drafts forever, esp. on his birthday. but enjoy :} minors& blank blogs dni.

you: hey kats i miss you :(

you: katsuki? i need you

you sent those texts at around 11:36 am and it’s now almost an hour later, with katsuki being in a very important heroes’ meeting of some sort. now, katsuki never takes time or leave off of work only on the condition he’s practically spilling his guts onto the floor - and even so, he’d come in with his hands wrapped round his lower abdomen if he wasn’t chastised for showing up half dead.

this wasn’t out of the ordinary for you - you know, to text him all needy and sad. don’t get it all wrong, it makes katsuki’s heart clench to have to leave you to your lonesome when he’s busy and you’re not. he knows how you get when you get off your period and mixed when you’re also feeling poorly comes a combination of you feeling melancholic, sweet and also very needy. by the way, did he mention needy yet?

katsuki: what’s up with you? you ok?

his phone vibrates almost as fast as he tried to stuff it in his pocket and he inconspicuously looks down.

you: no… i need you :((

katsuki sighs looking at your texts, excusing himself from the meeting and giving what he’d consider sympathetic eyes to his friends before dialling up your number.

“you okay, princess?” katsuki frowns, “i know you ‘aven’t been feeling well these past few days but ‘m busy-”

“katsukiii,” you all but whine into the phone, mewling and he straightens up immediately at your voice, ears turning a cute shade of pink. oh. he knows this tone. he knows it all too well amongst the linen sheets of his bed.

“i know i shouldn’t be calling while you’re busy but, fuck, i need you, need you so much,” you gasp on the other side of the line, practically swimming in his bed, wearing only your cotton panties and a barely there tank top.

katsuki bites his fist, standing behind the conference room door, groaning quietly. “yeah?”

“mhmmm, i really do,” you simper, “you looked really good this morning an-and you smelt so good and… ‘m just really, really needy right now.”

katsuki should tell you to get a grip, dash some cold water on your face and put your fingers to good use but the way you’re moaning and whining across the phone is making all his blood cells rush from the rational parts of his body down to the irrational parts of his body.

“where r’you right now?”

“in your bed… just like how you left me,” you sigh, a pathetic and wanton lilt to your words. “all alone in this big and cold bed wishing my big, strong man would come home and give me what i deserve.”

your flushed face boyfriend all but snarls, teeth bared over the phone. “yeah? what d’you deserve, then, for interrupting me at work and and then begging me to come home and fuck you? cos that’s what you want, right? for me t’drop everythin’ and come running to you?”

“yup,” you hum, popping the ‘p’ and some rustling can be heard in the background. “well, ‘s your choice, really. i just… really need you, baby.”

you can hear katsuki’s deep breathing over the phone and you’re so certain you can hear the cogs in his skull turning, clicking as he mulls over this decision. he clears his throat, lamenting with a big sigh as if this is all one big inconvenience for him.

just at that moment, deku comes through the door.

“everything okay, kacch- dynamight? if you’re busy we can discuss this with you another time.”

“…‘m gonna have to head home for a little while… something’s come up. don’ wait up. i’ll be back as quick as i can.”

katsuki wants to bite you when he can make out the smile over your exhale through the receiver but you’re quick to hang up as deku reassures his friend in his naïveté, unknowing to the true purpose of his mid day return home.

when katsuki returns within 10 minutes since your call (usually it’s a 16 minute drive from the agency to home - pedal to the metal), you’re already on the couch, and your tank top does nothing to hide the hardness of your nipples and katsuki can see the shape of your cunt lips through your barely there panties.

no words are passed as you smile sweetly at your boyfriend, who kicks off his shoes and whose hands already at his belt as he stalks over to your seated body.

“how d’ya want it, huh?” you’re already moving back across the couch, legs spread.

“just fuck me please,” you whimper, “wan’ you to stretch me out with your cock.” you paw at his hips, at the waistline of his trousers that situate themselves in front of your face.

“you don’ want me to stretch you out first?” he muses, dropping down to his knees in front of your scantily clad pussy, thick fingers pressing on your covered clit and you hum, shaking your head.

“i can take it right now,” you gasp, and two fingers slip into your pants despite your protests at how you “don’t need to be prepped,” and that you “can take him right now.” alas, you shut up effective immediately when his fingers skim through your panties and straight to rubbing your hardened nub and you can’t find it in yourself to get annoyed when two digits slip inside you, curling up only for a mere second and jolting your body along with it.

katsuki pulls his dampened fingers out, effectively taking off your panties with him. “your decision. don’t get pissy with me later when it’s sore, because ‘m not gonna have it.”

you shake your head defiantly, utterances of “i won’t” and “just please fuck me,” meshing into a slurry of words.

he grabs your face to look at you. “you promise?”

you nod and he frowns, smushing your cheeks slightly. “you better speak up and fast, because i ain’t got all day, princess.”

“i promish! i promishh.” the words come out muffled against the grip of his hand. your boyfriend takes the answer anyhow, because he gets up from off his knees to impatiently throw off his blazer, then down his trousers and pants in one swoop.

there’s a smug look on your face and katsuki can tell you’re trying to hide a triumphant smile. he wants to wipe it off your face so badly.

“face down, ass up, pretty lady.”

you throw yourself around without a second to spare and katsuki stuffs a pillow under your hips, slapping your ass in the process. at any other time, you would’ve scolded him for leaving a print. instead you moan and arch your back, clenching cunt on display for his hungry eyes.

“fucking minx,” katsuki grumbles, settling behind you and letting the weight of his mostly hard cock tap against your pussy, delving between your puffy lips and rubbing against your hardened clit.

you try to be good, try not to say anything that might make him want to punish you but you’re growing restless at what feels like hours of torture (hours being mere seconds that is) and you sniffle out a weak “katsuki, please…”

his heart clenches at your tone and even when he’s trying to tease you, he can’t help but feed out the palm of your hand. he also can’t help that his dick pulsates in his grip at the pathetic tone of your voice.

“don’t rush me or i’ll leave you like this,” he grumbles, and you both know he wouldn’t dare, and you’re about to protest, turn your head to spit defiantly at him but it’s much too late for that. he sinks in, weighty and thick and it knocks the breath out of you. you practically face plant into the armrest of the couch and your teeth bites into the cashmere fabric.

there’s something about not being prepped before that makes this so much more intimate and sexy for the both of you, but the impending realisation that you will be sore tomorrow dawns on you as you feel the heft of his balls press on you. he’s right to the hilt and you’re full to the brim, gasping.

neither of you can get a word out edgeways or sideways - katsuki leans down to wrap a thick arm around your neck and though he can barely see your face, he can feel the salty tears dribbling down his forearm and he can most definitely hear the wordless cries coming from out your agape mouth.

“this is what you wanted,” he hisses, nose in your hair, his wide body trapping you to the couch, “don’t you fuckin’ complain later- fuckin’, shittt,” he groans, pulling back out slightly and getting sucked in by your silken walls. the living room has gotten 100 degrees hotter and he wants to blame you so badly, but you moan out his name wantonly, one hand around his own that’s slightly bruising against your neck and he’s putty.

“hurts so good,” you finally get out, toes curling when the tip of his cock hits against that honeyed spot. “jus’- jus’ like that,” you slur, legs shaking and thrashing when you feel katsuki’s hand slip between your bodies.

all he can focus on is how fast you got sloppy for him, the conjoining of your bodies, if only fleeting, is getting to him, if the clench of his balls has anything to say about it. his hand finds your throbbing pearl and a straying pointer fingers rubs on it firmly in broad, confident circles, and you choke, eyes crossing.

your body stiffens and you’re not even sure you’re speaking a coherent language at this point, but you garble out something along the lines of “i love you,” and “i can’t take it,” and a contradicting “like that, katsuki.”

behind you, he’s thrusting even harder and rubbing faster at your clit, pressing down with ferocity and you’re not even sure what you’re begging for anymore, the tension in your bladder rising. even in the midst of a second, impending orgasm do you turn and try to kiss him, which he gladly accepts, tongue delving into your mouth and he inevitably hunches, grunting and huffing, red faced and shooting ropes of thick cum inside of you.

that’s when your second one hits, and it’s even heavier than the last, sprays of liquid hitting your boyfriend’s lower abdomen and you squeal, hips gyrating and katsuki doesn’t slow until you’re basically limp, collapsed against the softness of his sofa.

he kisses your head, pulling out and you gasp at the exit. no words are shared as he brandishes a damp cloth from somewhere - he must’ve gotten up in your daze, you didn’t even know he had left from behind you at all, and it makes you sigh, cheeks resting against the armrest.

katsuki cleans you up in typical, sweetheart fashion, passing you a blanket and your clothes like he always does after a romp, and it’s only when he makes you sit up so you can eat a banana and drink a glass of cold, fresh water do you say something.

“so i take that you’re not going back into work?”

katsuki’s eyebrows shoot up into his hairline, and he looks away from you, pouting. you think he’s not going to say anything till he scoffs a short moment later, “…’s not like i had much to do today anyway… i’ll catch up with those idiots later.”

you don’t bite back your smile this time and he pulls you into his chest. “you better wipe that shit eating grin off ya face.”

“or what? you threatening me with a good time?” you giggle, wiggling your brows and he opens his mouth to bark back until you move your hips slightly and hiss.

“what was that?” he questions and you ignore him. he groans, swiping a hand across his face,“…y/n, i-”

“‘m not complaining!… but i would be lying if i said it’s not a little sore- hey!”

katsuki wraps you up in his arms, blanket strewn.

“what are you-”

“since ‘m taking the rest of the day off, might as well go clean up and have a bath… remind me to never listen to you again.”

“hey! it’s not my fault you’re such a brute,” you laugh as he kisses your face, walking up the stairs.

“not so hard!” you hiss in pain, “‘m sore!”

yeah. remind katsuki to never listen to you when you’re horny.

#bakugou x reader #bakugo x reader #bakugou smut #༝˚૮ .♡ katsuki.#✎𓂃uma thirsts。°˖⌕#✎𓂃stamped: (my hero academia)。°˖⌕#bakugo smut #bakugou imagine #not proofread no beta we die like MEN #ok byeeeee

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nobodyinfart · 1 month

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Would they keep you as a secret from the crew?

For Johnny, I honestly doubt that man could keep it on the down low. I mean, he practically graduated with a Bachelor’s Degree in Yapperism, like fr he’s the certified yapper of the force. Soap would praise you to the high heavens, saying stuff like “my baby is such’a good cook, lads. I miss their food already.” even if he just came back from deployment. You could be meeting them weeks later and Captain Price is like “Oh, how’s your new job going for you?”, leaving you completely bewildered that Johnny talks so much about you that the team is aware of what’s going on in your life.

Ghost will definitely keep your relationship on the quiet side at first, since he’s genuinely certain that it will not last with his emotional baggage. However, you prove him indefinitely wrong, loving him through thick and thin even in his darkest days. Despite him not having said anything specific to the team, his body language tells the team that there’s someone special lighting up his days. Maybe it is the curve of his masked mouth as he smiles at your messages, or the way Simon stares a little longer at beautiful sceneries that remind him of you. And the beaded bracelet he wears on his wrist is the dead giveaway all the team needs to confirm that you are there waiting for him to come home.

Now, Gaz is the one that I am not entirely sure about. Since he isn’t as open about his personal life as Johnny but not as secretive as Simon, he may not treat your relationship as a complete mystery. Somehow, it makes it sweeter if Gaz were to let it slip from a conversation with the boys yet act completely nonchalant as if it wasn’t a secret to begin with. “Didn’t take you for a flower kinda guy, mate.” Soap commented when he watched Kyle stop by a florist to get a bouquet on the way off their base area. “Wanted to get something to surprise the darling back home,” Kyle replied without a blink, as if he had not said anything out of the ordinary. Also the one to comment that the team didn’t ask when Soap shrieks out why he hadn’t mentioned a loved one.

As the Captain on the task force, Price is no doubt not the type to dish out that kind of personal information straight away. Rather, your existence is evident in the necklace that has your promise ring looped on his neck at all times (yes, even on missions). In private, John kisses the ring with your initial engraved on the inside of the band as if a sort of subconscious reminder of what he’s fighting so hard for. I do believe that Price would be more open to talking about you to old friends, so Laswell knows of you well and would definitely have your contact in the scenario that anything goes south. Even with his expertise, you still worry about your lover on the field.

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