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writing-havoc · 2 years

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I love you

♡ Summary: Three times Fezco said I love you without saying it, and the one time he actually did say it

♡ Fandoms: Euphoria

♡ Pairing(s): Fezco x Reader, platonic!Ash x reader

♡ Warning(s): Standard Euphoria warnings

♡ WC: 8.6k

This was originally supposed to be a 5+1 but then I saw the word count and decided to cut it short lmao. However, I still like it. I tried to make the reader as gender neutral as possible

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Clumsy clumsy clumsy.

House parties were honestly your specialty. Weaving through the crowd, foreign bodies passing sweaty intoxicated heat into your skin, drinks being held far above your head to avoid an embarrassing and guilty spillage. This was a place you loved to be in.

Maddie grazed her long nails over your arm as you passed by, giving you eyes that would send any man's knees wobbling. Your gave her a similar look, dissolving into giggles as you continued on.

The smell was horrible though.

In part with all the alcohol of varying brands swimming in the red sea of various colored solo cups, with the occasional glass someone brought from home with a plastic cover, there was the gross smell of too strong cologne and sweat mixed in that made everything a little nauseating.

Tendrils of vomit slipped into your nostrils, and you just about had enough of it when you discovered the source in a poor potted Swiss Cheese plant. That thing was gonna die without proper disposal of the bile, but it wasn't your house. Ergo, not your responsibility.

Still, you felt a little bad.

In the sea of people you spotted friends from in high school and out. Jules and Rue were seated in the corner, giggling into eachother with a look of pure euphoria in their eyes. Elliot hung off to their left, laughing at something they said, looking not at all left out despite clearly being a third wheel.

Finally, your eyes landed on the one face you were actually seeking out.

Fezco leaned back in the couch, a blunt tucked comfortably in his ear. A boy too young to be doing any sort of drug, maybe 15 going on 16, handed the man what looked like a Benjamin in exchange for some Molly and as much weed the rest would get him. Fez handed him the weed, telling him to seek out Ash if he wanted the Molly, a little yellow ticket in hand to show proof of purchase to him.

The boy walked off with a smile on his face, and you hoped you wouldn't be seeing it on the news tomorrow.

Clumsy.

You walked on over, steps subconsciously tapping to the beat of the music that played in the houses surround sound speakers. Really, who has the money for this shit?

The moment Fez spotted your approaching figure, his entire body seemed to melt and relax, a dopey smile taking on his features that sent your heart beating wildly.

"Hey." He called, putting a hand on your thigh when you took a seat next to him. It was warm and rough, but not at all unwelcoming.

"Hey." You gave him his drink, which you had tailored exactly to his liking. He wouldn't be drinking all of it or even most of it in the time you spent here. A few sips would be taken and the rest left to be thrown away when you eventually left. He needed to be focused for tonight.

He thanked you with a squeeze to your thigh, which you patted and pulled your own joint from your ear.

Listen, you weren't no hypocrite. But you had to admit your earlier statement was a bit hypocritical. There wasn't a large difference between a 15 year old smoking weed and an 18 year old smoking weed, but you imagined yourself at 15 smoking a joint and couldn't but think "baby."

You're sure in three years would say the same thing about your current self, but that was for future you to deal with.

Right now, it was just you, Fezco, and this joint in your mouth.

Without a word he passed you a lighter, which you lit the weed up with, taking a puff before slowly letting it out.

You've been smoking for around two, nearly three years now, and it never ceases to amaze you that the smoke you breathe out comes from you. It was always something you saw from other people, watching in fascination as in some cases it pooled out of their mouth like fog, and in others it shot out like a jetstream, only to disperse almost instantly.

It was jarring at first, seeing it stream out of your lungs with no end in sight. You often panicked back then, thinking you were going to choke on smoke and never get a fresh breath again. But the more often you smoked the more your anxiety quelled, realizing it was irrational, but valid nonetheless at the time.

Sometimes that old anxiety comes back to haunt you, but here and now you felt safe. A new clean breath was sucked into your lungs with no difficulty, and your racing heart ceased to a calm rhythm.

"Aw, shit." Fez's voice sighed from beside you. Before you could ask what's wrong, he was already supplying you an answer. "Can you get my charger from Ash, please? My phone died." He pouted.

You chuckled. "I'll get the portable one from him so you don't gotta move."

"He don't got the portable one."

"Yes he does, hun. I made sure to hand it to him to hold on to in case his phone died." You patted his thigh, releasing his hand from your own. "But it seems you beat him to it."

He smiled. "What would I do without you?"

"Die, probably." You returned his smile, taking one more hit from the joint before handing it to him to keep safe.

Walking around with a lit joint in a sea of alcohol was the least of what you needed. He took it softly, taking a small drag before flicking off the ashs at the end. You hurriedly put the thought of "indirect kiss" out of your mind.

Looking around, there was no sign of Ash. It was a gamble on if he was nearby and watching or not. The kid was a little unpredictable.

Making your way back through the crowd, you looked for open slots between groups that would lead you anywhere. It was best to just go with the flow. You would have to find him eventually.

Wandering hands touched your skin, but you were quick to move elsewhere, passing between a pack of girls to stave off the hands. The motions were familiar, into the crowd, between some girls, into the crowd, between some girls. You did this until you were outside, eyes wandering into the small groups.

Several firepits were constructed around the yard, something you assume wasn't done by the actual owners of the house.

Quickly, you walked around the property, eventually finding the boy next to some buyers, where he dished out some Molly from the blue handheld cooler.

"Yo." You called as you approached, tapping him on the shoulder. He looked to you, giving you a nod in acknowledgment. "Fez needs the portable charger."

Ash rolled his eyes and shook his head, you laughed. He reached into his pocket and pulled it out, the cord attached.

"Thanks, dude. See you when we leave." You called over your shoulder.

You wound the cord around your palm, holding the charger in your hand as you made it through the crowd. The paths opened up right to the bar, and honestly, you thought, why not?

Grabbing a solo cup, you poured in some punch which you knew had copious amounts of vodka in it. The red matched the cup almost perfectly. Taking a sip, you were met with that strong taste of 15% alcohol you hated so much. But damn, the punch was good.

Clumsy clumsy clumsy.

Quickly, you descended into the crowd once more, cup held to your shoulder as you miraculously made it through unscathed.

You smiled upon seeing Fez in the same place you left him, your joint pretty much gone.

"Fez, got it-"

You were cut off when a ruckus erupted behind you, a solid form was slammed into your side. The contents of your drink were spilled all over your attire, drenching the white clothing in what was going to be a very difficult stain to get out.

"What the fuck!" Your voice dropped an octave, anger coursing through your veins at your now wet top. The man turned around, eyes bloodshot and clearly unstable. He apologized, but you weren't convinced he was really seeing you and turned back around to his perpetrator.

They were corralled outside whilst Fez came up behind you, checking you over.

So fucking clumsy.

"You aight?" He asked, taking the cup away from you and throwing it to the ground somewhere.

"Yeah I was just- that surprised me." You took a glance down at your top, which was already getting sticky. You wiped your hand on it, and sighed in frustration.

"Cmon, let's get you changed up."

You frowned. "But I didn't bring a change of clothes."

He tsked, giving a small chuckle. "You really forgot yer own party rules, huh?"

Party rule #4, Always bring a spare change of clothes. You never know who's gonna be an idiot.

"Listen-" but you never got to explaining as you were towed along, heading to the upstairs. You watched from behind Fez as he marched through the line of teens and new adults making out.

You eyed your conjoined hands, and an overwhelming sense of homeliness pooled over you. It wrapped around your brain and sported a fog that made it hard to focus on anything else. It wasnt until he reached a door which was revealed to be a bathroom that the fog cleared and you were gently pushed inside.

The door clicked behind you, and you had a very hard time keeping a straight face.

"Since you forgot some clothes, I'll just give you mine."

The thought sent flames licking up your body and eating at your heart. It warmed your cheeks and dusted your shoulders a color that felt very close to the color of the punch.

He stripped from his sweater, revealing a shirt that you wished wasn't there, and carefully placed it in your hands. He didn't want to push it into your punch covered top.

"I'll wait outside. Change out yer clothes and we'll go back down." He couldn't look you in the eye, a pink hue dusting his cheeks, and closed the door.

You stared down at the fabric, feeling the soft cotton in your fingers. It was warm, and didn't grab at your skin at all. It was textured in a way it was supposed to resemble knitting, but you knew full well he bought this online numerous months ago from a larger company. One that didn't care for authenticity.

Changing out of your top, you used it to wipe off any punch that managed to stick to your skin. You wet it under the sink, scrubbing the partially dry liquid off and washing your hands. The sweater came over your shoulders easily, sliding down your skin and encasing you in a warmth that sent goosebumps barreling across your body.

Thoughts crowded your mind, and it took every single drop of will power to shove them away. It smelled like... weed.

You chuckled. But you could also smell small hints of Fez.

A very thin layer of cologne engraved into the fibers peeked its way out, dancing in your mind as you began to style the shirt with your outfit. It wasn't hard.

Actually...

The sweater went perfectly with your outfit.

"Man, fuck High School."

Your head met the table with a thunk, the sound of a drinking glass momentarily hopping on the table made your heart race. There wasn't a crashing sound afterward, though, so it calmed.

Fez chuckled from beside you, staring at the math homework.

Choosing to take AP Calculus was a mistake. It really was. The sheer amount of work that was shoved down your throat and the fast pace was not something you had originally thought you were prepared for. Especially since this subject was particularly tricky. It was either skip this units homework and hope for the best for your grade or suck it up and at least get half points.

You chose the latter. Which means you're now stuck trying to make sense of U-Subs for integrals that had Euler's number and by fucking god did it suck.

Euler's number never made sense to you. It just didn't. Which was a problem since a lot of the later topics had Euler's number in them. That paired with natural logs (which did make sense for the most part, just not with Euler's stupid e), you just wanted to take your brain out and rinse it out under some water. Same thing with your eyeballs.

"Cmon, head up. You're on the las' one."

You scoffed. "And coincidentally it's the hardest one."

The sound of your binder scratching the table pricked your ears. Did he understand any of it?

You know from what he told you that the only subject he was good at in school was math. But how far did that genius go?

"I wish I could help, but this is all gibberish t' me." Not this far, apparently.

You sighed. "Yeah. It's kinda gibberish to me too."

Lifting your head, you looked out the window through the curtains. It was a little grey out, the palette of the outside world smudged and lacking life. It was gonna rain soon.

The fact tore your mind in two. On one hand, you really loved the rain. There was something tranquil about the rapid tapping of droplets falling onto a roof. The slight chill that would permeate the air, nipping at your fingers and nose. The smell of it fresh on the asphalt and the humidity of the world as it was quickly evaporated by the ever unforgiving sun.

But on the other, it meant having to go home. And Fez currently didn't have a car since a druggie (you winced at the word as it played in your head) popped it and you didn't bring your bike, not bothering to check the weather.

You cursed under your breath, and began to gather your things. Despite the anxiety that leeched into your blood, you packed things away slowly, wanting to savor the time you got with Fez and Ash. Even if the younger boy was cooped up in his room.

"You goin' already?" Fez asked. And you did your best to pretend the words had no effect on you. He was like a siren, trying to bend your will to his desires, making them become yours.

"Yeah." You shoved the binder into your bag. "Wanna beat the rain if possible."

"Well lemme go with you." He got up. The sentence somewhere between a statement and a question.

For a moment you thought about denying him, asking him to stay here and not trouble himself. But honestly? You wanted the company. Yet you couldn't help but feel a little like a chore.

"You don't gotta if you don't wanna."

Fez continued on, sliding some shoes onto his feet and grabbing a lighter from the coffee table. "Ya wanna get home b'fore it starts raining or nah,"

The words bit at your heart, thinking your suspicions were right, but the way Fez looked at you sent it all reeling to a halt.

He straightened himself, standing on the tile in front of the door and looked at you with an expression no short of eagerness. He was eager to walk you home. He wanted to potentially get caught in the rain. He was excited.

You chuckled. "Alright. But don't get mad at me if you become drenched."

You slung the backpack onto your back, adjusting the straps against your clothes and made your way to the door. Fez helped you put your shoes on, and opened the door to the outside.

The second you made it out the screen door, you knew immediately that your assumptions were correct.

There was a certain feeling to the air whenever it was about to rain, a smell. It felt a little heavier, the wind above shaking the trees a bit more than usual. It smelled, for a lack of better words, wet. Like the wind was carrying a pool of water right below your nose.

And, arguably, that's exactly what it was doing. But that ruins the poetry.

The chill bit your skin the second you walked out the door, and you pulled a scarf right out of your hoodie pockets and wrapped it around your neck.

"What the fuck."

Fez laughed from beside you, wind plastering his sweater onto his built body. He looked at the scarf with crescent eyes.

"What!" You shouted. "A hoodie has a large pocket for a reason. I'm simply using it exactly how it was intended."

Hmphing at him, you marched your way down the steps and onto the street below.

Apologies tumbled out of his mouth as he caught up to your pace, but the sincerity of them was lost with the way he was trying to hold back his laughter.

Despite your best efforts, you smiled too. You shoved him away with little to no force, and continued the walk in silence.

Cars honked to your right, trying to move others who were too slow to their liking or get a jaywalker out of the road. You remembered the day you were walking by and saw Rue hop out of a car and walk across the street without a care in the world. It was a long time ago, but the moment still stuck with you whenever you crossed this part of town.

Fez's arm brushed against yours, sending shivers up your spine. The urge to hold his hand was actually insane.

Eventually, the busyness of the main road bled away as you turned down a road, now opening up to a quiet subdivision. Roads branched off like tree roots, taking you to multiple parts that were lined with a canopy of trees. Each house had at least one in the front yard, more trees outlining the sidewalk as it twisted and curved.

You were comfortable, feeling no pressures and no anxieties or anything. Peace etched it's way into your bones, and you couldn't help but look over at Fez and feel a little lonely.

He was here, sure, but he wasn't yours. Not in the way you wanted him to be. You wanted to be grateful that he was here at all, that you would forever be okay with him just being a friend, but sometimes and more often than not, you found yourself wishing and wishing for something that wasn't likely.

It felt lonely, being with him but not with him. But it had to be enough.

Your house came into sight, and a gust of wind hit your body.

This was going to be a storm.

"Thank you for walking me home." You said as you walked onto the porch.

Well, it wasn't technically a porch. It was just a slab of concrete risen a little higher than the ground on the front of your house. A porch to you had a railing, wood beneath your feet and either two lawn chairs or a wooden swing on one side.

This was just,,, sad.

Bare concrete that has moss growing on the side, corners chipped off and a slipping accident waiting to happen when it got wet. Definitely not a porch.

"No problem. Was nice goin for a walk." His fingers twitched in his pockets.

"I'll text you later." You turned around and went to go inside, but halted as a hand grabbed your backpack. It was like being strapped to a wall and being told to run.

You looked behind you in confusion, and the sight was one you'd have burned into your memory for years to come.

Fezcos cheeks were dusted a light pink, eyes just barely holding their concentration on you. They flickered away, only to go right back to where they were before. His chin was dropped a little, and his hand was still in his pocket, the one gripping the handle of your backpack now brought away and held up in a manner that read "did I really just do that?"

"Everything okay? You gotta get home soon if you wanna beat the storm."

If only you knew at the time how much he wanted for that to happen, begging for the clouds to start pouring and force him inside with you. But they stayed heavy, holding their droplets close.

He reached out again, pushing the backpack in a way that had you turning to face him, and he pulled you closer off your concrete pedestal and into his arms.

They wrapped around your shoulders, putting a pressure on you that had you chuckling. You wasted no time in wrapping your arms around his waist, sucking the warmth from him and sharing yours. The faint sound of his heart reached your ears. It was fast.

You stayed like that for a few moments, body's swaying in the wind but sturdy.

"I'll call you when I make it back." He whispered.

It was an amendment to your statement that you could not be happier with.

As you parted, the only thought in your mind was 'Yeah. This is enough. For now.'

"-and honestly I'm sick a fucking tired of your bullshit." The words tumbled out of Rue's mouth faster than you hoped she could think. You wanted this to be a mistake, just blind rage brought on by withdrawal. But the venomous look she was giving not only you but your father told you maybe this was the truth. Maybe this is one of those situations where "drunk words are sober thoughts" was true.

You just... blanched. Frozen in complete and utter shock and something that tasted like disgust.

"Rue," your father spoke up, "you need help."

Silently you cursed at him.

That was not what she needed to hear. It was the farthest thing; even as simplistic and truthful as it was. And you could see as the words hit her right in the face, poking her in a way you would poke a bear in the woods. It was asking for something more fierce and dangerous to claw at your skin.

"Fuck you." Rue spat, her glare directed solely to him.

He looked like he was going to respond, but finally reason caught up with him and he shut his mouth.

But she wasn't done, even as tears tracked down her face. A deep seated animosity plagued her features as she turned towards you.

"And you. You and your fucking boyfriend are nothing but scum. You act all high and mighty, refusing me drugs when you're nothing but addicts yourselves. You're hypocrites and lowlifes!" She said this, all the while getting closer and closer, a finger digging into your chest and spit splattering across your cheeks.

Her behaviour was beyond disgusting and not worth the effort and you knew that. You knew that and willed yourself to stay silent and not react but the way she talked about Fez infected your brain and ate any rationality you had.

You stilled yourself. "You do not get to talk about Fez that way." The words came out slow and calculated. "Especially when you went and did this to yourself. You and everyone here knows even if Fez didn't give you anything you would have got it from someone who probably wouldn't have been so kind."

She seethed. A big booming "fuck you!" unleashing from the very core of her being as she stomped away, trying to leave out through the door. But it was blocked, the couch being thrown in front of it in an attempt to keep her inside. You knew in her state she probably would have been strong enough to yank it away, but she was like a cornered animal. Lashing out but never truly thinking. The tears came out harder.

"This is such actual bullshit you don't know anything about me. Youre suffocating to be around with your fake caring bullshit." She grabbed a vase from the shelf next to her and threw it at the ground, the pieces shattering and shooting out toward your feet. "You care too much and it's sickening! Fuck you!"

Finally, the caged animal had enough, picking up a dining room chair and smashing it into the bay window.

You screamed a little, your father blocking his face. The crunching of glass let you know Rue had escaped out the opening, dining chair now in the flowerbed beneath it.

Silence passed over the house, the wind rustling the soft thin curtains. You both began to process what happened, but a small voice from below you halted your brain functions.

You forgot you were on call.

"Y/n!" You heard faintly. "What happened!?"

With a press of your finger, you ended it, and dropped the phone.

A gust of wind brushed the curtain against your cheek, and you began to sob.

Red hot anger boiled in your blood and yet you mourned the relationship you just lost.

After everything you did for her. Staying sober for weeks on end (which, admittedly, wasn't hard considering you weren't an addict like she was, but the weight that the gesture held wasnt something to just be discarded) when she would become aware of piss tests, giving her a roof over her head when she had a fight with her mom and needed a place to crash, keeping her secret from Jules and giving her advice. All these things and so many little ones defined your friendship and just like that they were thrown out the window.

And it fucking sucked because it's- even if she apologized and the both of you made amends, the relationship would never be the same. It would never be as it once was and that thought was scary and just plain depressing.

A hand rubbed your back. "Lots of things were said-" you sobbed again as your father began to talk, "but I'm not gonna bother you about them now." He carded his fingers through your scalp. "I'll go call Leslie and tell her Rue's gone."

As much as you loved your dad, he wasn't the best with being comforting. But he tried his best.

You took deep breaths, a sob escaping every few exhales. Getting control of your breathing was the first step to cleaning up this mess. After another round of controlled breathing, you looked around.

Glass from the window and porcelain from the vase dotted the floor, but the glass was mostly on the sill area. Getting the big pieces was essential. You crouched down and began to pick them up, making a path towards the kitchen where the broom was kept.

Slowly, you began to sweep the pieces up, careful to go over every spot a few times to ensure the small slivers got corralled. Your foot was relatively unscathed save for one piece that you managed to let slip through, but the cut wasn't anything deep.

When you were putting the broom away, the door swung open, revealing a scared looking Fez in the doorway and a similarly frightened Ash looking through the hole in the window.

The sight of them made the tears start coming again, but you didn't let them escape. You closed the broom closet and walked over to him as he was pushing the couch back to its original place, bringing him into a hug he immediately reciprocated.

"You okay? She get you?" He pulled back, holding your face in his hands.

A bruise was forming on your cheek from when Rue busted your door open, escaping from the first place that you trapped her in, but that was it.

"Fez it's-" you cleared your throat, swallowing the sticky spit and pushing the lump down as far as you could, "- it's fine. Do not give her a hard time she's just- fuck." A tear escaped, and you quickly swiped it away.

Ash walked through the door, dining room chair held in his hands. He looked at you and you could see the hesitation and anger forming in his body. You pointed to where he should place it, and he moved without a second thought.

Fez continued to hold your face, thumb brushing across the bruise as the storm in his eyes became wilder everytime you winced.

You grabbed his hand. "Stop. You're just pissing yourself off."

Your father procured a hand pan and brush, tackling the shattered glass and removing the trinkets and photos from its sill.

A small shattered frog reminded you of your room.

Locking her in there wasn't the original course. After she put the pieces together that her mom had called your dad and told him to try to keep her there, she went hysterical, going on a tirade throughout the house.

You pulled away and went down the hallway, moving the broken pieces of your door out of the way to assess the damage she had caused.

And to say the least you were... a little devastated.

Slow footsteps followed yours, a silent "holy shit" escaping one mouth and a louder "holy fuck" following after.

A glass of water you had in here from earlier was shattered on your rug, glass now embedded into the fibers. Various clothing items were strewn across the floor, more glass probably hidden beneath them and a good majority ripped to shreds. A shelf of small potted plants was barely hanging on by a nail, the succulents and small frog decor on the desk below, dirt piling onto your probably shattered laptop.

Your bed was torn apart but nothing seemed damaged. And- and your favorite clothes didn't look to be anywhere in the torn up mess. And... fuck.

Seeing your safe space completely obliterated, contaminated with someone's violent anger, made you break down to your knees. No amount of scrubbing and replacing will help how this room felt now.

The moment tour knees rouched the ground Fez was on you. "Hey, it's okay. Cmon, get up off the floor it ain't safe." Hus carefully guiding hands came to your arms, trying to get you to stand up. But it's like- fuck, man. Nearly everything you held dear either had water on it, dirt on it, was smashed, or was torn. You couldn't stomach it.

He continued to gently coax you out of your tightly wrapped ball on the floor, brushing away glass shards with his hands. He made some sort of motion, and you knew Ash stepped into the room, clearing a pathway to your bed.

After a few moments, your crying being swallowed down your throat and held there, you got up and walked over to the mattress.

"Hey, go out to the car and get my phone, will ya?" You knew Ash didn't appreciate being told what to do this much, but he was a good prioritizer and left with barely an argument.

A moment of silence passed between you two.

"I..." You began. "I never would have thought she would just..." The words escaped you. "I didn't think she was the type."

He sighed and sat next to you, pulling you into his side and resting his head against yours. "They never do."

And you knew that. You fucking knew that. But that didn't make being faced with it any less shocking and uprooting. You really truly thought Rue would never be the type and yet-

Fez could see your mind whirring, and he squeezed you closer, his other arm coming to hold your hand.

"It's okay. I got you."

You looked up at him, hellbent on not believing what he was saying. But the moment you locked eyes, the sincerity within them threw away any doubt you had.

Your body sunk in on itself as you began to sob once more. But with the way Fez wrapped his arms around you, gently unfolding your body and placing you front to front, and an air of safety wriggling into your bones, you knew you weren't going to stop anytime soon.

+1.

Tossing and turning in your bed was not how you wanted to spend a Saturday afternoon, completely inable to sleep with the roaring of the wind scratching at your windows and an unbreable heat drowning your skin.

Summer was supposed to be a time of joy and relaxing. You're supposed to be happily sleeping knowing you have a nice two months to relax before you started to worry about your future and college and all the other adult bullshit. A job wasn't needed yet with the scholarships you got saying they would pay for most of your first four years. Rue had gotten better, too.

At least you hoped.

You opened your eyes, staring up at the glowing plastic stars on the smooth ceiling of your bedroom.

It had been redone the following months after Rue's outburst. Nothing dramatic had changed. A new rug was ordered, not trusting anyone's ability to dig the glass out of its clutches to feel safe enough to keep it. The small pots that were broken were glued back together, the white cracks telling a rather morbid story. A book that was buried under everything was replaced with a better version, some extra scenes hidden in the back of it.

The clothes you had lost were replaced with a majority of Fez's own. He complained that his entire closet was going to transfer into yours at this rate, but you knew he had absolutely no problem with you sharing. You gave them back often so they could smell like him again, but you would never say that out loud. He seemed more overjoyed to receive the article of clothing after it spent a week at your house anyway.

You still bought some of your own, and took the opportunity to expand your style. Thrift stores scattered in the area became your new best friend as well as some small etsy shops and redbubble accounts.

The room still didn't feel right, but that was something you think was never going to change.

You looked over at the clock. 1:37am. Groaning, you leaned over and grabbed your phone, throwing the thin sheet away from your body.

The air conditioning had the luck to break the week before summer officially started, and no amount of box fans helped when the air was already a billion degrees.

You peeled yourself away from the thin sheet, t-shirt sticking in place on your back like it didn't get the memo that you sat up. You gripping the hem and pulled down, feeling the relief as your skin was free. You wore nothing on your bottom except some underwear. It was too hot for anything else and hell, you might even need to shed your shirt soon if this kept up.

A ping from your phone sent you flying across the room. You always turned your phone on do not disturb before bed. There are very few people who you let bypass.

Thousands of scenarios flooded your mind, all horrible and more morbid than you would ever like.

Fezcocoa: u awake?

You sighed in relief.

y/n: Unfortunately. Why?

The bubble popped up as you unplugged the device, standing in the middle of your room. You grabbed a bit of your shirt and started shaking it, trying anything you could to create some cold air. Your hair was sticking to your face and the air was thick with heat. Would you ever be able to take a breath again?

Ping.

Fezcocoa: i know ur ac is broken, we just got ours fixed yesterday. wanna come not be miserable?

You were about to refuse. But then-

Fezcocoa: got cocoa for u too. weirdo

y/n: sold

Listen, it may be a hundred and ten degrees outside, but that doesn't mean you can't enjoy a cup of good ass hot cocoa.

It didn't take long to find a pair of acceptable shorts and your shoes, a random shirt from off your floor and some underwear from your dresser were located aswell. Dumping out your unused school bag you shoved them in and grabbed your charger and other little things you might need. A book was placed last, carefully put on top to not fold the paperback cover and pages.

You zipped it up, grabbing some tape and paper and putting it on your door, writing a note in sharpie to your dad. It told him where you were and when you left, along with a little doodle in the corner. He worried too much. Or maybe enough. Who knows.

Slipping outside the house was easy enough, getting your bike out of the garage was another. It took a solid 5 minutes of struggling to be quiet and maneuvering it out the side door before you left.

A sliver of cold air slid around your body as you peddaled. You pedaled faster, chasing the feeling.

It was a good ten minutes before you reached Fez's apartment. You reached into your bag for your bike lock you shoved in there when in the garage and locked your bike to a pole below.

Fez was waiting for you on the steps to his apartment when you bounded up them. The smile that broke across your sweaty face was a testament to your relief.

"Hurry up let me in." You whispered shouted, not stopping to greet him properly.

"Well I know all I'm good for."

When he made his way up the steps you were bouncing on your heels, excited for the way you'll get sticky with cold until entry. He smiled and walked up, opening the door for you.

A blast of freezing air assaulted your skin and you groaned in pleasure.

"Oh thank the stars and sky's above. This feels so good."

To exaggerate your point you laid on the ground, backpack abandoned next to you as you basked in the refreshing air.

Fez chuckled from the doorway, slowly closing both doors in an attempt to be quiet. Ash most likely was still awake but it was only respectful to keep the volume down to a civil level.

"Get up off the floor. Shits dirty." You heard him mumble something about needing to get a vacuum as he picked your backpack up and walked down the hall to his room.

You indulged yourself a bit longer, letting your muscles relax against the apparently dirty floor.

"Can I take a shower?"

"Sure." Footsteps began to make their way back down the hall, then stopped. "Want me to put yer clothes in the bathroom?"

"Please?"

Without a second thought he retreated back to his room.

Faye shouldn't be here anymore. As much as you liked the blonde it was high time for her to go. She was basically like an insurance policy for Custer and no one deserved that. You had talked with her about her relationship with him, trying to get her to see that her boyfriend wasn't a great person but you had no way of knowing if anything stuck.

"Aight, your clothes are in there." He came out of the hallway, standing in your direct line of sight.

You sighed. Can only lay here so long before the cooling sweat made you sick.

Slowly you pulled yourself up, dirt off your face and clothes.

You looked at Fez, his cheeks dusted a small shade of pink, and smiled.

"Thank you." You said, touching his arm. "Can you make me hot cocoa while I'm in there? Please?" You pulled your best set of pleading eyes.

A dangerous feeling of triumph licked your insides when Fez's blush became darker.

"Sure, ya fuckin weirdo." He nudged you toward the hallway. "Hundred degrees out and you want to drink something hot. Makes total sense."

You just smiled on your way to the bathroom.

The thought of scraping your skin clean with a wash cloth and cleansing your hair with a good clarifying shampoo gave you a skip in your step.

However, when you closed the door to locate your clothes, you were met with one's you most definitely didn't bring in your bag.

It was the same underwear and the same pair of shorts you had packed, but the shirt... it wasn't your shirt you had grabbed. It was one of Fez's. And a sweater he had bought for you to keep here some time ago.

You didn't miss the underwear thrown haphazardly in the mix.

Heat pulsed over your body when you realized what Fez had to grab. You slapped your face into your hands, exhaling deeply.

Idiot.

You hopped in the shower as quickly as you could, making the water a little colder than usual in an effort to shock your system and cool off.

Cold showers were hell on earth but this was necessary.

Mental images of Fez grabbing your clothes from your bag filled your mind. His fingers running along the hem of your underwear and curling around the sides, pulling it from the bag. His cheeks slowly tinting more and more pink the longer he held the undergarment in his hands, trying to relieve the warmth coating his neck and down his shoulders by bundling it in your shorts.

You wanted to pull his shirt away from his neck and track how far it reached, kissing and licking to feel just how warm-

You hissed as the shampoo got in your eye.

This was going to be a fun night.

The motions of your nightly routine began to take affect. You showered as fast as you could to not waste water. A warm towel was waiting for you on the door. Your clothes were thrown onto your body, your toothbrush in hand from the glass cup they were held in on the sink rim.

Brushing your teeth wasn't a strong suit. You spent maybe thirty seconds scrubbing your teeth before taking some floss to it and calling it a night, your tongue getting scrubbed at the very end.

It was tempting to hole yourself up in the bathroom a little longer, but the memory of hot cocoa waiting for you on the kitchen counter had you speed walking out of the door as fast as you could.

The cold air stuck to your damp hair. Goosebumps rose over your skin and pinched even more when your hands made contact with the warm mug of chocolate. The heat sucked right into your skin, traversing through your body and warming your limbs.

You sighed in pleasure, lifting the cup to your lips and taking a sip. The moment it hit your tongue you knew it was Fez's special hot cocoa that he has spent at least a month trying to perfect to your tastes. The gesture made you want to cry a little every time he came to you with a mug and eagerly awaiting your feedback like a puppy.

"You really are weird."

You chuckled, setting the mug down. "Not my fault you make the best cocoa I've literally ever had the pleasure of tasting."

"It best be. I spent so long trying to figure out exactly how ya liked it."

You didn't say anything, just gratefully lifting the mug back to your lips and taking another long sip.

The TV was playing an old black and white movie Ash liked, the volume soft to accommodate the late hour. A gunshot rang on the screen, a cackle coming after.

"Where even is Ash? He in his room?"

"Nah," Fez shook his head. "Little man stormed out 'bout an hour before you came here. He just needs to cool off a lil. Even took his bike." He walked over to the counter as you hopped up, legs swaying a little.

The distance between the two of you quickly became severed, him standing mere inches away from your legs, hand just a few centimeters from brushing your skin.

Proximity wasn't necessarily rare. But it certainly never occurred this intimately. At 2:24am on a hot summer night with your favorite drink behind you and an apartment to yourselves. Usually it was sharing a couch with a joint being passed between you, shared glances becoming stares that dissolved into giggles over and over again. There was space, boundaries.

His fingers twitched, brushing the hot skin of your thigh momentarily. Not even momentarily, actually. Evanescent. Ghostly. Fleeting.

There was a moment a long, long time ago where you considered what it would be like to kiss the man before you. That minute thought opened up a world of feelings and thoughts that have plagued your being for the last few years, growing and growing and infecting every move you made since.

That, you decided, is what you blame your next action on. Just, curiosity. Leaving out the well of feelings that have expanded into an ever growing lake of life.

You moved your leg, adjusting the rest of your body under the guide of getting more comfortable, shifting it and brushing it along his fingers. His breath hitched a little, and you could see his eyes flicker up and down, your own staying fixed on him. An intense feeling of both fear and yearning passed over you. Which is what you blame your next move on.

The mug found its place in your hands again, head resting on the cupboards as you offered it to him, snapping his attention away from the tension that you had created.

When he took it you could have sworn his hand jumped upon brushing yours. But his hold was still firm, and took it from you to take a sip.

A little bit of anger made your stomach drop, disappointment taking place where it once was.

That's just how it was, you supposed.

Coward.

"Mm." He made a noise. "That's really fucking good, wow."

You chuckled, grateful. "Of course it is. You made it." You tipped the mug towards you, taking a gulp of its contents. As usual his hands were warm against your own, skin not really cared for but not fully neglected either. He had small travel lotions in the bathroom that was cycled out every other month.

"I jus' never thought to try it. Been makin' it fir you, not me." He watched your lips as your tongue swiped over them, licking up at chocolate that may have gone missing.

"You make some for yourself sometimes."

His expression softened even more if it were possible. "If you like it, it's good 'nough for me."

The vulnerability in his voice sent your face ablaze. Heat spreading down your neck and across your shoulders. Your expression changed too, tipping him off as to just how much what he said affected you.

Thankfully, you weren't drinking anything, and avoided a choking hazard.

"Man you can't just say shit like that to me. You gonna give me a heart attack." You pushed him away, hand firmly on his chest as he set down the mug. His face was nothing but smug and prideful.

He chuckled, but took your hand and stepped into your space even more than before. It was embarrassing how quickly your legs opened up to accommodate him, his hand placed by your hips while the other guided your own toward his lips.

"Dont want that now do we." He kissed your knuckles.

Everything he did or said made your heart race and cheeks burn hotter.

Was this a joke? If so, it was downright cruel.

"Har har, very funny."

But you couldn't look at him. The threat of unraveling was much too great.

"Look at me?" It was more of a question than a statement, but it was said in a tone that was much too soft to ignore.

Hesitantly, you looked at him. He was far closer than anticipated- so close, even, that you could feel the breaths from his nose and smell the cocoa on his lips.

"Since you're dense. I gotta say this shit out loud." He started.

It made your heart do two things. Drop and Skip. You wanted to say you knew him well enough to know you knew where this was going but you didn't. Assumptions filled your mind but you didn't want to be wrong. You didn't want to seem full of yourself. What if this was about something else entirely-

"I love you."

Oh.

Everything halted. Your thoughts, your breathing, your blinking, your heart, the fucking movie on the TV. Everything just stopped.

You couldn't believe your ears, honestly. Just yesterday you couldn't hear your dad calling to you from on the other side of your room while you were doing an internet deep dive. Maybe you were going deaf or something. Audio processing disorder was more likely.

"What?" Your voice was soft and small and it almost pissed you off.

"I love you."

Oh.

Your mouth opened and closed like a fish. How was this fucking real.

Fez seemed to take your silence and reaction as rejection. When he took his body away and dropped your hand you whined at the loss of contact, fingers looping in his jeans.

"You." Now he was surprised. "You... are a dick."

The smallest of smiles started on his face, growing increasingly wider as he began to catch on. He followed your lead as you tugged him back to where he was before and then some.

His hands snaked around your back, pulling you taut against him with his face barely inches away from yours. "Yeah?"

Where'd he get the audacity? "Yeah. You are."

Your fingers barely grazed up his body, sliding across his chest and up his neck to allow your hands to find purchase on his face, the pad of your thumb on his freckled cheekbones.

"Why's that?" He flickered between your eyes and lips, eager but patient.

"I don't know." You tilted your head in. "You just are."

Kissing him was nothing like you could have ever began to imagine. Now that you're here, you will admit you have thought about it before. But this could not have compared to what you thought it would be. It took your expectations and stomped on them, forcing the bar into the sky.

They were soft and gentle, but still held a hunger to them in the way they moved against yours. He nipped at your bottom lip and there was nothing you could do to stop yourself from complying and turning to putty in his arms, opening yourself up and holding onto him.

You wanted him closer. So much closer. His arm pulled you forward, other hand cradling your jaw. Your chest pressed against his, stomach connecting afterward as you broke apart. Barely a moment passed before you reattached yourself to him,

He felt hot, the skin of his neck burning blisters into your fingers, his back even hotter against your palm. You scratched him a little when he pulled you even closer, sending a groan vibrating through his chest and into your mouth. It made your stomach twirl and legs clench around his hips.

"I love you." He broke apart, resting his forhead against yours. He placed as kiss to the corner of your mouth. You chased after his lips when he pulled away, stealing another kiss from him.

"Fuck." You tried. "I love you too."

You opened your eyes to find him already looking at you with a stupid grin to match his stupid face. "Yeah?"

A chuckle bubbled up in your chest, euphoria blooming from every inch of your skin.

"Yeah. Yeah I do."

And if Ash found you being gross and making out on the kitchen counter ten minutes later, well that's his problem.

#euphoria #euphoria fanfic #euphoria fluff #fezco x reader #euphoria fezco #fezco #fezco fanfic #fezco x y/n #fezco x you #drugs tw

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