"And I think for that reason I find fan fiction especially a really interesting and really rich mode of expression that, of course, a lot of people look down on 'cause it's - you know, it lacks a certain literary polish. But I respect that about fan fiction. Like, I respect that fan fiction is so much the product of a compulsion, of a yearning, that it almost forgoes all of these pretensions of polish, of quality, of sophistication. And in that sense, for me, there is something that's revealed at the heart of fan fiction that I think is essential to all great literature, which is this desire to put yourself in the same space as the transcendental, you know, to almost touch the hem of it without really quite grasping it."

The loneliness of the central character in Esther Yi's 'Y/N' is universal, an interview with Esther Yi (NPR)

I could love only that which made me secretive, combative, severe, a moral disappointment to myself, and an obstruction to others.

Esther Yi, Y/N

y/n — esther yi

I’m tired of experiencing reality as that which happens strictly to me. My small life can’t possibly encompass all of human experience.

Esther Yi, Y/N

I could feel the frustration mounting as the prose grew ever more sodden, as the author submitted to yet another cliché, hoping their strange feelings would foment, coherently limbed, out of the primordial soup of failing story. But I preferred these stories to most contemporary novels, which mirrored the pieties of the day with absurd ardor. For all the lone superiority suggested by their tone of moral indignation, these books were mind-numbingly easy to agree with. I preferred reading fans and dead people because they were hard to agree with.

Esther Yi, Y/N

i absolutely devoured Y/N by Esther Yi in two days. i found it so strange and enjoyable. it gets a lot of flack, but i don't think it takes itself too seriously as others say. the verbosity adds to the whimsy, and i literally never knew what was coming next.

i really look forward to whatever Yi writes next.

Books Read in 2023: Y/N by Esther Yi

"I would love for you to know what this feels like," she said. "I would love for you to feel as badly as I do. But you’re headed for a place without answers. So turn back around and dig your heels into a world that’s been waiting here for you all along."

From Y/N by Esther Yi

Finished Y/N!

It was... odd? gonna say odd. Little disappointed it stayed firmly in reality, no thriller or sci fi horror twists here. It was good, I think? But way less about Y/N reader insert culture and more about - idk, existentialism and weird musings done by weird characters. This would absolutely tank on booktok, and I say that as a compliment.

I wasn’t sure how to navigate a space filled with strangers who knew I loved what they loved. It was like going to the sauna, except our naked bodies were identical, which made the embarrassment recursive and pointless.

-- Y/N, by Esther Yi

As a human being who cannot live without love, I know full well that I have exhausted my options on this disappointing planet. The question is no longer 'Who are the people who will accept my unusual love?' but rather 'How do I make my love more unusual and more unacceptable.'

Esther Yi, Y/N

y/n — esther yi

My Month in Books: July 2023

Infamy: The Crimes of Ancient Rome by Jerry Toner Normally I’m always quick to pick up a book on the ancient Romans, but I grabbed this one double quick because Jerry Toner was actually one of my supervisors at university. He’s a fantastic teacher who runs a course on Roman popular culture and under his wise guidance I got to study (and write very long essays on…) everything from graffiti to…

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I could love only that which made me secretive, combative, severe, a moral disappointment to myself, and an obstruction to others.

Esther Yi, Y/N