#eric cartman x you | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

dollyyss · 5 months

Note

I FELL INLOVE WITH THE KYLE FIC OMG??? OK OK WHAT ABOUT THIS.

the main gang with an S/O that is like, VERY VERY SNUG/TIGHT, like unnaturally tight (but not negatively ;)). Also a virgin, like the biggest virgin out there, completely oblivious to stuff like that and super sensitive to touch in general, talking just a graze of fingertips might gain a small whine. I'm thinking maybe a correct adjective for this would be just the classic virgin reader + the things listed. AAAAA FEEL FREE TO DO THIS DEPENDING ON HOW YOU HAVE ENERGY I KNOW UR SICK😭🙏

-🃏

..sigh you just love to do things to my brain don’t you anon.. WHY MUST YOU DO THIS TO ME- NEOCIE IM GONNA GO FERAL RAWR RAWR RAWR jk I’m such a sweet girl, I’m an angel I would never. Tehehe. And I’m sick so I’m an even more touchy just brain melty mood.

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

Kyle’s gang + butters with virgin reader!

Established relationship ₊ ⊹

All characters are aged up! Highschool AU! ‧₊˚✩彡

Kyle, Stan, Kenny, Cartman and butters 𐙚

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: smut/ NSFW, some degrading

Kyle 🐇𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒🪐

“Just like that holy fuck.. you’re so good for me.” Kyle let out a low moan, his head leaned far into his pillow whilst you slowly rode him. “That’s it baby, slowly, don’t look away, keep looking at me, that’s it. Keep watching me baby” his hands held either side of your face in an attempt to keep you with him, to keep you from looking away from him. Your legs shook on either side of his waist, your hands covering your face as you helplessly rutted against Kyle. You practically sucked him in earning groans and whimpers from the lanky gingers lips. “Fuck you’re tight.” He couldn’t hold back anymore, not with the way you gripped so tightly around him, not when he was trying to pull out to slam back in. No you gripped so tight he couldn’t even pull out. It was enough for him to grip onto the sides of your face harder, pulling you down so your forehead rested on his and he snapped his hips up into a ruthless pace.

- He’s a sweet boyfriend. He’s just a sweet guy in general. So when you tell him you’re a virgin he of course would never ever judge you for it.

-what he didn’t know was everything he did could basically make you drip on the spot, and majority of the time it’s shit he doesn’t even think of. He’s sitting with you in a restaurant with Stan and the rest, he softly touches your thigh, opening it to drag you closer to him. He doesn’t think a thing of it until you let out a squeak. Everyone raises their brows, Kyle looking at you when he feels your thighs squeezing his hand. Ahh.. you were sensitive too.

-“have you.. ever touched yourself..?” He asks curiously before feeling you shove his shoulder “Kyle broflovski!” “What? Sorry, I’m sorry. I just. Wanted to know” there was silence before you slowly nodded. He thought for a moment “has anyone else ever touched you?” He questioned again, watching as you shook your head side to side looking at him with big doe eyes. Your hands placed between your thighs. He softly bit his bottom lip, watching your body gently rock back and forth at the thought “do you.. want to be touched?” He slowly scoots closer to you, watching as you slowly lay back on his parents couch, his hands coming to tease the hem of your pants.

-he goes so god damn dumb when you grip him. He doesn’t know how to act. It’s like his brain shuts off and he goes into auto pilot. He’s usually gentle but fuck when he feels you grip so tightly, tight enough that you can feel almost every curve and vein littering his cock, he’s biting your shoulders and slamming into you. He’s swearing, panting. He’s so fuck drunk he doesn’t know what to do.

Stan .° ༘🎧⋆🖇₊˚ෆ

Panting. He’s a panting mess. He tries to form words but he’s so focused on trying to find a deeper angle, trying so desperately to feel you tighten even more then you already were. Your finger nails dig into his raven locks watching as your feet bounce due to your legs being locked around his waist. He was slightly hunched over, his hands on your ass to lift the bottom half of your body off your bed by a couple centimetres, his face buried in your hair while he lets out pleasurable grunts. “Stan!” Your lips spewing his name made him open his watery eyes, lips immediately coming to your ear. “I know, I know. I’m right here.” His hips snap as he slowly sits up, his member pulling out but with a struggle, his tip being the only thing remaining in your gushing warmth. “Can you take some more for me? Hm? Think you could do that?” When he watches you nod he gently takes your legs from his waist and pushes them against your chest, finding himself thrusting deeper at the new angle, your walls clenching so god damn good.

-“virgin? Really.. you? Are a virgin?” He almost doesn’t believe you because to him he can’t see how someone like you could be one. He’d thought everybody would be all over you. But he would admit he was proud to be the one to take it from you. He’s kinda dumb. So he doesn’t catch on. He just thinks you innocence is just, well how you are. But no.. no it’s for many reasons.

-he guides you 100%, you might actually make him a bit nervous because he doesn’t want to ruin this for you. He doesn’t want to take your purity away in such a vile way, he actually wants to make sure it goes exactly how you want. Tell him and he’ll do it. “You’ve got it babe”

-like I said Stan is a little dumb from time to time so he just doesn’t understand why you can’t sit still on his lap. He doesn’t get why your legs are practically shaking and stuttering against him when his large calloused hands come to hold at your hips. Maybe he’s not dumb he’s just, oblivious. He’s noticed that when he sweeps the hair from your neck to the other side you shudder, gripping onto his arm. “Are you? Are you good?”

-when he finds out the reason for it being you were a virgin he kinda.. likes it. He likes that he can be the one to make you act like that, how a single touch from him could have your legs open for him. Of course he takes is time with you. But he does enjoy teasing you from time to time.

-.. the first time you give him a handjob he’s definitely staring at you. He’s on the couch because his parents aren’t home. So what a perfect spot to do so. Your hands pump his cock so well while you partially hide your face, turning it the other way. His arms are resting on the head of the couch, one hand coming to turn your head so close to his you can feel his breath. “Don’t shy away from me..” his eyes are on you, nose pressed to your cheek as you pump him faster, you bottom lip tugged harshly under your teeth.

Kenny ₊˚🕯️🖤❀༉

“Mm I think you can take more sweet thing.. shhh I don’t wanna hear another word. You lay and look pretty for me yeah?” Kenny’s pace was torturous as it was; but having him grip onto his headboard, and pushing you further into his sheets was enough to make you clench harder around him. He shivered, his smile growing wide enough to expose the missing tooth on the right side further back. “Kenny please! I can’t do it.. I-i can’t take much more” you pushed at his lower stomach, still your grip around him was hard for him to pull out, pulling out would mean feeling every inch of his cock and that alone was pleasurable enough to send you to your edge. “Awh the poor baby, that’s a shame isn’t it, cuz you are” he was quick to take your jaw in his hands, pounding into you, his other hand pushing down on your shoulder to keep you from squirming. “Fuck I love the way you clench around me, like you don’t want me to leave” he cooed at you. Feeling yours fingers scratch and grip at his sides and lower stomach once more.

-he’s a horndog. So finding out you’re a virgin? “SCORE” he’s jumping over the moon for joy! Really it’s nothing to be so happy about, so giddy, but he’s just more or so happy it gets to be him that shows you everything.

-he’s probably one to tease tremendously until you finally lose your virginity to him. He likes watching you twitch and squirm at every touch he gives, but he makes sure his touches are extra touchy. He’ll walk behind you to grab your chest, when your making out his tongue is tracing your collarbones all the way down to the hem of your underwear. He wants you to feel like it’s about to happen but he’ll keep you waiting just a little longer.

-he’s probably gotten you to hump his leg. I’m not kidding. He was sitting on his bed, watching you walk around a little too tempting for him. He wasn’t exactly ready to do things to you quite yet, and he didn’t want to force you but when you ended up on his floor, sitting on his foot to try and get off. That shit eating grin never left his face. “Where did that pretty little innocence go hm?” “Kenny.. s-stop it’s not funny”

Cartman 🎧✮🧺✧˖°

“You’re so pathetic.” cartman pulled out, before pushing himself back in further “squeezing and gripping my cock like you don’t want me to stop.” He repeated slowly pulling out before pushing back in. “You go so dumb for my cock you can’t help but clench onto me huh? You silly little thing” who knew Eric cartman was also a teasing little shit even in bed. You. You did. Your hands held onto his shoulders, your feet planted on his bed, knees up and shaking as he worked his way to a somewhat quicker pace. He kept his thrusts short but he was deep. Both due to him and you pulling in him each time he tried to pull back a bit. “Eric, m-mm~” he cocked a brow stopping for a moment before looking at you fully. “Go on, say it, I won’t move until you do” your eyes shot open “mmm- more I want more please” he chuckled gently “you greedy bitch, I’m giving you so much and you want more” he listened though, he gave you what you wanted. He always did in the end.

- “pfft. Fucking virgin” he was too. So don’t let him get to you. Is he going to tell you that? Fuck no. Do you know? Yeah most likely I mean it’s cartman he’s lucky he even landed you. “Cartman shut up. That’s fucking rude and it’s not funny” you crossed your arms. “I’m sorry I’m sorry.. hmm” you shot him a glare. “Cartman.” He placed his fingertips to his lips “it’s just.. a little funny” he pinched his fingers together to make a small gap between his thumb and pointer finger. “I hate you.”

- a fucking tease, like Kenny he uses it to his full fucking advantage. He’ll tease the fuck out of you but just won’t give you want you want. You want him to take your virginity and baby he will. He just wants to get you all pent up, hot and bothered.

-from time to time, when things feel like they’re getting closer, and both of you are practically undressed his tip is teasing at your entrance, slowly circling before he stops for a moment, “hm, I don’t know, I’m feeling a little *yawn* sleepy yknow?” He smirks before laying down on his back watching as you look wet and dumbfounded, legs slowly closing as you sit up. “What the hell Eric..” he looks at you. “You could, suck me off? How does that sound?” You roll your eyes lowering your head at his commend. Don’t worry.. he’ll do it. He just likes to tease you to the very edge, to where you think you’ll get it.

Butters ˚☆🐈*๑

“P-please I won’t last much longer if y-you keep doing that..” butters stutters his words. He has you in a mating press, his legs surprisingly keeping him up, as he slams back down repeatedly. “I’m sorry baby.. I-i can’t he-help it oh my god~” your hands run through his hair, his head lowered towards yours as his lips try to reach your own. You clenched around him each time he pushed in. And god did he love watching himself pull out to watch you grip, your juices coating his member. And when you were left empty he watched as you pulsate trying desperately to find him. The look of it.. fuck he couldn’t help himself. He couldn’t help but to give your tight fit exactly what it wanted “ahh~ lord.. I’m so close~” he whispered against your lips. He knew if his parents seen him now he’d be grounded for god knows how long but Jesus you drove him crazy the way you sucked him back in.

-“virgin? Well that’s alright darlin! Me too! We can learn together!” What he doesn’t know is you’ll have him sucked in, he can’t escape. Not that’s it’s bad. But he becomes addicted. Ever since the you told him, all he’s had on his mind is you gripping him so tightly, your warmth and softness. He’s like a rabid little bunny. But he does keep it to himself, he wants to be gentle with you, sweet and attentive the very first time. You both wanna make sure the other is comfortable.

-he finds it cute when he touches you and you practically moan. Because.. he does the same thing. You touch the back of his neck? He’s shuddering and moaning at the way your fingertips softly lingered. He loves when you you lay him down on his bed, lifting his shirt to kiss around his belly button, your lips lingering against his slight bright blonde happy trail. And he does the same to you, his lips tracing every inch of your body until he reaches between your thighs “mmm.. can I?” He asks gently “well I’ve never done this before so if it’s bad.. I’m sorry” he looks up at your with puppy dog eyes, making sure you know he’s just never done this. When you give the okay, he gentle.. but he can’t help himself when he tastes you, he’s immediately got your legs over his shoulders, and he’s making you squirm and scream. He’s very proud of himself. He’s not much of a tease but he tries to when he gets in the mood

“Well don’t you look awfully pretty” he mutters in your ear, watching the blush creep onto your cheek and you squirm in the place you sat. He’s not the greatest at teasing but hey he tries. And he makes sure you both learn one step at a time.

-but once he’s had it once…. There ain’t no going back. He’s like a wild dog off its leash.

Im sick.. and I’m feeling.. in the mood. I love them. I want them.

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qtkat · 1 year

Text

being childhood friends with the main four would include..

gender: female (she/her)

warnings: none, other than it’s south park

request: no lol

a/n: this is my first time posting my fanfiction, so please be kind with any criticism! x <3

- being one of the only people eric can genuinely get along with

- because let’s be real, if he were to let a girl in his main friend group he’d definitely have to actually like you

- and if even eric likes you, the others definitely love you

- you’re really close with all of them, picking up kenny and karen with your shitty car every morning, slacking off and talking about whatever with stan in first period, rating the day’s school lunch with eric (you both take this very seriously), and letting kyle coach you through your biology homework after school

- you’re really the glue to their broship, because without you there kyle would’ve definitely dropped eric at some point and they would’ve split up the whole group

- but don’t worry, they don’t argue as much as they used to in elementary and middle school

- ironically you all have one period together, ap history with mr. garrison

- it’s definitely your favorite time of the day because you get to see all your favorite people at once

- it’s also definitely not mr. garrison’s favorite time of day, he’s hated you little gremlins since fourth grade (and you can’t really blame him)

- outside of school you try to see them as much as possible

- you definitely see kenny the most, he loves just hanging out at your house so he doesn’t have to be at his own

- he even takes karen with him sometimes, and you love babysitting her together and going out to hang around south park

- if you smoke you guys get blazed together all the time (it’s tegridy weed he steals from stan’s house when he’s there)

- whenever you’re just chilling with your other friends (like bebe or wendy) he comes up to you throughout the day to ask if you want to have a smoke break with him

- if you don’t smoke he definitely tries to blow the smoke away from your face as much as he can

- you’re his trip sitter

- he’s also visited you as mysterion, kind of like how they do in miraculous (if you catch my drift)

- you’ve definitely bragged about being friends with mysterion before, much to eric’s dismay

- speaking of eric’s dismay, he’s the most jealous friend you’ll ever have

- “who took that picture of you” “why aren’t you free this weekend?” “why won’t you go to casa bonita with me” “why do you hang out with that loser anyways” ALL. DAY. LONG.

- he loves hanging out with you alone the most so no one steals your attention away from him

- he likes people knowing you guys are friends since he thinks you’re cool (and honestly he just wants people to think he’s cool too, he cares)

- you don’t call him fatass and he really appreciates it, he doesn’t say it though

- you need to pick up a lot of the love you get from eric like context clues since he doesn’t ever really say it out loud

- also liane LOVES YOU

- she sees you as a good influence on her son

- she’s also the type to try and get you to eat over every time you come over (which i also see sheila doing)

- speaking of sheila she’d definitely invite you to celebrate hanukkah with the broflovskis, it became a yearly thing

- kyle and you are study buddies since he doesn’t want you to fail and stay a class behind

- he gets angry when he gets sad, and you can deal with that really well, you calm him down really easily

- you guys have deep conversations whenever you’re alone together

- you hang together on the roof of your house and watch the sunset while talking about the meaning of life or some shit LMAO

- if you also have textured hair you guys would have joint wash days and it’s so cute

- and 80% of the time you’re with kyle stan is there too

- not that you mind

- if you play and instrument you have definitely written music together with stan

- and even if you don’t you love hearing him play, you’re his number one fan

- jam sessions in his barn >>>

- i feel like i’m one of the only people who isn’t a football stan truther, like he’s literally a little nerd who plays guitar

- he plays warhammer with you if you’re into board games, and you guys get really into it together

- that first period chat i mentioned earlier? yeah definitely filled with your character lore and shit

- stan loves hanging out at your house to get away from his dad, honestly yours and eric’s houses are just the general hang out spots for the gang

- whenever you guys hang out with the five of you it’s mostly video games and chilling with food

- subsections of the group are definitely you/stan/kyle and you/kenny/eric (even though eric doesn’t like sharing you he gets really bad FOMO anytime he’s not there)

- whenever you hang with kenny and eric it’s filled with immature jokes, and probably weed too

- idk i just see kenny getting high 24/7 and i feel like eric would try smoking at least once

- kyle and stan won’t try weed, since stan hates it and kyle promised not to try weed to stan when randy bought tegridy farms

- and because butters is basically a bonus member of the group you’d definitely also be friends with him

- you, kenny and butters make the best trio ever, you guys have so much fun

- butters deserves someone sweet in his life and you two are definitely that to him

- whenever he’s working you and kenny just hang around the whole day in a booth, sometimes kyle comes over too to help you study a bit

- willy chilly’s is a hang out spot too, it seems so nice in the summer

- in conclusion you and the boys have a great friendship, and you have ever since you were young! it’s so cute honestly

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h-harleybaby · 6 months

Note

Ignore this if you’ve done it but matching costumes with the boys… what do YOU think they’d wear as couple costumes with reader

~🍋

STOOOOP THAT WOULD BE ADORABLE AHHHH

I doing the main 4 + Butters because you didn’t specify them :)

Cartman

• Would absolutely suggest doing something vaguely racist, but dw y’all don’t… even if you have to physically shove Cartman into the bathroom to change. He’s probably pissed about it the whole night tbh

• Probably makes you go as a KFC chicken bucket while he’s the Colonel Sanders because he genuinely will not shut the fuck up until you agree to it. It was so stupidly embarrassing

• He would most definitely force you to go to a party so he could show everyone y’alls costumes before dragging you out to go do other things. He really just wanted to brag and embarrass you

• Cartman will absolutely make you go trick or treating with him despite y’alls ages, and y’all stay out sooooo late that people aren’t even out anymore. He refuses to end the night until he hits up everyone’s house and demands all the candy they have

• At the end of the night you guys stop by the dollar and grocery stores to buy all the cheap Halloween candy that’s on sale. Don’t worry you’ll get your cut on the candy too, it’s just a bit… smaller than his cut

Stan

• Stan doesn’t really care enough about Halloween to plan to dress up or literally anything, but if you insist he’ll probably throw something together quickly

• You guys go as Sally and Jack but his part of it is really half assed, he still looks good tho!! It’s just, a lot people couldn’t tell who he was as at first. He probably got so drunk he couldn’t even remember

• Speaking of getting drunk, he throws a costume party because you insisted on doing something for Halloween. You asked, he delivers! Everyone’s there, even people from straight up other neighboring towns. People hear alcohol and and will do whatever to get it

• An almost concerning rowdy party and it wasn’t even from the party goers! It was from Randy swinging on the Chandelier and supplying all the alcohol. Overall a really memorable night… well to most of the people who went

• Like father like son, neither Stan or Randy could remember anything from last night but regardless, they had an unspoken agreement. Never tell Sharon and never speak of it ever again, the night never happened. Well, the pictures you took definitely say otherwise

Kyle

• Sheila insists on buying y’all’s costumes and she gets y’all some peanut butter and jelly costume. Kyle absolutely hates it but he would never tell his mother, thank god he has a job so he could buy something else and just change when you guys leave

• Y’all actually end up going as Morticia and Gomez Addams even though Kyle in general looks a little too colorful to be Gomez cough cough GINGER cough cough but regardless, he tries his best to slick his hair back and hunch over more so he could be shorter than you. It doesn’t work but it’s the thought that counts right?

• Half way through the night hall switched costumes because you didn’t wanna wear heels too long and he wouldn’t have to because of how tall he is. Shelley let him use her hair straightener and you’re pretty sure you burnt off some of his hair but it’s tooooootally fine, absolutely fine (he doesn’t know)

• Kyle was honestly kind of miserable the whole night, he didn’t really WANT to be there but you begged him to do something with you and Halloween and Stan would’ve dragged him to the party regardless if you asked him to go or not

• Though I suppose you asking really did help, he might’ve just bailed when he heard there was alcohol. Despite everything… he makes a really good Morticia but that was mainly because he was tall and would do the tango with you if you asked

Kenny

• KEN AND BARBIE YOU SAY? I THINK SO!!!!!!! It’s hard to find something in his closet but he ends up trying to spray paint his parka bright pink and writing “I am Kenough” in black sharpie. Oh that poor, poor parka

• You had to physically force him not to try throwing together some haphazard dick costume that he wanted to use soooo bad. He tried to hard to convince you that you guys should go as a dick and sperm

• Thank god you guys didn’t, y’all ended up taking Karen trick or treating for a couple hours and she went dressed as a lil skeleton!!! It was the cutest thing ever, kinda stuff to make your heart melt

• After Karen got tuckered out y’all went to the party, might I add just in time to watch Randy scream and hang from the chandelier in only underwear. Honestly it was a lot funnier than it should’ve been, the man was stuck up there the rest of the night with you both passing up bottles of liquor to him

• Very memorable night for everyone involved, and somehow everyone knew what you guys were dressed as!! I suppose the bright pink and “I’m Kenough” really helped

Butters

• Would also suggest something racist but he doesn’t really know it, at least you give him better ideas so y’all don’t end up coming off weird

• Y’all would totally end up going as Joker and Harley Quinn, it’s completely overdone and cringe but y’all still go as them. Green hair and shirtless and EVERYTHING! His parents don’t like it at all and he ended up getting grounded later

• God you guys are sooooo cringe together, like y’all quote Harley Quinn and Joker stuff the whole night if y’all go to a Halloween/costume party. Multiple people will gag and throw up in their mouths. Multiple

• He’s the type to go to the party with you and almost have a heart attack because of the music, he would be paranoid that his parents would ground him for hearing such music. Somehow they did and they weren’t even there to hear it 😭

• You suggested going trick or treating but Butters was convinced he’s too old for it and his parents would def ground him for being out too late with someone as pretty as you. After a lot of convincing you got him to hit up a couple houses with you before you guys went home, the old people were very confused

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rxptdevil · 11 months

Text

South Park manin 4 Relationship headcannons

Warnings:minor sexual content aged up ofc

Stan marsh

Probably, has you sit on his lap while he plays his video games or when you would beg him to show you some affection because you miss him

“Baby ill go to the room with you in a sec just this last round."

Literally LOVES having morning sex with you

Every time in the morning, when you get up to get ready, he ALWAYS has to bring you back in to cuddle him.

You always come to all of his football games since you're a cheerleader. every time he sees you, he steals a smug glance at you.

And doesn't mind roughly fucking you after losing a game.

Kyle broflovski

Lots of study dates before he confessed

Literally kicked cartman’s ass when he called you a whore in front of him.

You always come to his basketball games to see how good he looks in his shorts to support him

“You did so good out there baby”you said while pecking his cheek

You guys probably have workout sessions together

You probably begged him to tutor you because you were failing most of your classes

Whispers how pretty you are in public

“Have I ever told you how pretty you are” Kyle said while stroking your hair

Eric cartman

Literally kept ripping on you until you found out about his feelings

You probably only go to his house because his mom cooks actual good food

Since he’s more wealthy than the other guys, he LOVES to spoil you a lot

Broooo I’m imagining him annoying the fuck out of his friends by bragging about you so much to the point where Kyle punches this man in the face

He probably doesn’t even share his food when he’s around you and ALWAYS has to steal food from your plate

Literally begs you for attention in public or at home

“Please babe can we go homeee” Eric said hugging you from behind

“Eric I’m trying to hangout with my girlfriends”

Kenny MCconrick

OMG, I don’t even know where to start bro man’s a huge pervert

Only goes to cheerleading practice to see how good you look in your uniform

Literally only begs you to tutor him so he can see tits look when you move over the table to help him with a math problem

Same thing as Eric brags about you to his friends

Bro, if this man’s wants sex he’s getting it, no questions asked

You literally always have to slap his hands away in public every time he try’s to tough your private parts

“C’mon babe let’s go in the bathroom” he said with a smirk. You already knew his plans

“Kenny! Your friends are here we can do this when we get home!”

“Aww screw them! there they're just gonna have to deal with it”

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st4rb3rries · 9 months

Text

the main 4 meeting you for the first time

pairings; stan, kyle, kenny, cartman x fem!reader (all aged up 17-18)

summary; reactions and meeting you

warnings; cussing and suggestive language

a/n; hopefully you guys understand the kyle and stan one😭

how kyle and stan met you:

you met them senior year. they saw your fine ass in class and were like "gawd dayum 😍😍🔥❤️" NAH JK kyle and stan secretly talked shit about you because you were the smartest in class. (they haven't even talked to you once) it was mostly kyle because he was jealous of your academic intelligence.

kyle: "who does she think she is acting like a goody two shoes and she shouldn't even be talking with that big ass forehead her calculations aren't even correct dude i'm totally way smarter than y/n🙄"

stan: "ong bruh like her forehead is bigger than my relationship with my dad😭 and no one can outsmart my super best friend dude🤨"

y/n: ....

like y'all sit close by each other in class and they still have the audacity to talk shit😭. they weren't even slick either you could clearly hear them but they thought you couldn't.

but one day things changed. they were struggling in algebra so you decided to help them. out of the kindness of your heart? no. the teacher told you to help them. this was the moment that would change everything.

y/n: "hi do you need some help it looks like you guys are struggling"

kyle: "no were fine we don't need your help"

stan: "yeah dude you can go away, kyle is way smarter than you we don't need you"

kyle: "yeah that's right i'm smarter than you punk so you can go away now🤓"

y/n: "ok kyle why did you pick 'd' instead of 'c' for number 1🥱"

kyle: "WHAT I THOUGHT IT WAS D HOW COU-"

stan: "DUDE WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TRYING TO MAKE US FAIL"

y/n: "ah look at that so you need my help after all"

stan and kyle: "smart ass"

y/n: "what was that hm?"

kyle: "smart class"

stan: "y-yeah we have a smart class😇"

y/n: "i know you guys talk shit about me don't think your so slick"

stan and kyle: 😮😮

they stopped talking bad about you. since you found out you started "helping" them more and they both started getting to know you better. even though they still had their attitude. and with all that helping there formed a friendship<3.

how cartman and kenny met you:

you also met them senior year. you however only met them because you decided to ditch class and do your business under the bleachers. both of them have seen you in class and they know your smart. they just didn't really care about you though.

*you walk over to the bleachers*

cartman: "oh shit teachers, RUN KENNY'

y/n: "im not a teacher wtf😭 "

they got scared there for a minute. but they weren't anymore until they recognized your annoying voice. cartman and kenny also thought you would never ditch class because your so smart🤨. (they were generally surprised)

cartman: "sorry there's no nerdy bitches allowed😘"

kenny: "you can be my nerdy bitch😏"

y/n: "and that's why your moms should've swallowed both of you when she had the chance."

cartman: 😮

kenny: "HAHAHAH" *bros tryna get into them baggy jeans💀*

cartman: "what the hell are you even doing here"

y/n: "no what are you doing here🤨"

cartman: "ditching class duh you dumb slut🙄"

y/n: "ok tubby well i need both of you to leave"

kenny: "why🥹"

y/n: "don't worry about it"

kenny: "YES MA'AM😍"

unfortunately they stayed because they're nosy as hell. anyways after they both saw you make money by doing peoples homework. they had mad respect for you. cartman was even a bit jealous that you came up with so much money. kenny on the other hand was wondering if you provide other types of services🤔.

cartman: " here y/n take this why don't we talk for a bit"

y/n: "are these crushed up smarties🤨"

kenny: "ya you can smoke em' or snort em' "

y/n: "y'all can't afford the real stuff💀?"

cartman: "so about your services, i'd like to be your manager i can make you stronger and smarter"

y/n: "do you have a gpa of 4.0"

kenny: "does 2.8 count"

cartman: "kenny stfu im tryna make us some money here"

cartman: "anyways so-"

after talking with them you agreed. but little did know that agreement was gonna be a long one. both of them truly admired your hard work and at some point it wasn't about the money. they really just liked hanging out with you😭.

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n0tangeliccc · 10 months

Note

HII its one of the anons that brought up the boys and kids

Could you like imagine all of them finding out their SO was pregnant for the first time?? LIKE

I genuinely feel like Kyle would be like reading parenting books like he was studying for a test

Stan??? Literally mortified. like scared straight. how will he be a dad when he literally hates his dad???

KENNY would have actually considered like…. dipping out, but he didn’t and ended up being such a good dad. so loving

And cartman?? shockingly an okay dad, very protective though, probably because of all the shit he did as a kid

ive got mad baby fever too dw😭

-🍼

You’re killing me with these 🍼 anon!!!/pos

You’re so right with all of these

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ✧˖°.

Kyle he was shocked but really happy and was pretty calm until you started showing more symptoms than just morning sickness

Instantly freaks out anytime something that wasn’t in his book would happen

He’d constantly be calling Sheila asking if it was normal😭

HAS to be at every checkup with you or he would go crazy

Poor Stan is absolutely terrified that he’ll become Randy

Like instantly started to spiral once you told him

And might have considered leaving because he thought it would be better for you but when you gave him the “you’re not your father talk” he decided he really did want to be a dad🥹

For Kenny I really think it depends at the point in time of when you get pregnant like I said in my last post, either really scared or nonchalant but happy

He’d be such a great dad, like Stan he never wants to turn out like his own parents

He already raised his sister he’s ready to help you raise your kid to have the best life possible💗

Eric would definitely be a shockingly okay dad

He’d be less of a crazy asshole and actually help you with stuff

Definitely makes the pregnancy all about him though 💀

#angie rambles ♡#🍼 anon #south park x reader #south park fanfiction #south park x y/n #south park x you #stan marsh x reader #stan marsh x y/n #stan marsh x you #kenny mccormick x y/n #kenny mccormick x reader #kenny mccormick x you #kyle broflovski x y/n #kyle broflovski x reader #kyle broflovski x you #eric cartman x reader #eric cartman x you #eric cartman x y/n

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bblueberrypancakes · 10 months

Text

Cartman: Y/n taught me to think before I act.

Cartman: ...So if I smack the shit out of you, rest assured that I thought about it and am confident in my decision.

#bblueberrypancakes #south park x reader incorrect quotes #south park x you #south park x y/n #south park x reader #eric cartman x reader #eric cartman #eric cartman x you #eric cartman x y/n

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angel-gone-south · 6 months

Text

Eric Cartman X Fem!Chubby!Reader:

Oh, Hell.

Nobody asked for this. Also, Reader is a bit of a bimbo, soooo. Also, don’t be afraid of the word fat!! I love that word!!! I’m a fat writer so this one is for all my heavyset girlies.

【☆】★【☆】

Cartman was never one to mess with girls. Since his bout with Heidi, he just wasn’t really interested. Of course, that was until you showed up.

Love at first sight had never crossed his mind. Sure, you were super pretty. And he could tell you were a foodie- he liked that. Your fat fell in places he thought made you look almost ethereal.

When you opened your mouth, he sighed. Of course, the pretty girls were always kind of dumb. But it never pissed him off, in fact he got a huge kick out of some of your confusion.

“No, I’m asking! Seriously! What’s Obama’s last name?” Cartman cackled at your question. You flushed, looking away with a small smile. You didn’t know why, but making him laugh made you feel fuzzy.

Your history teacher had decided to pair the two of you together for that month’s project, given that you both had decent enough grades. The teacher said that the two of you could cover a lot of ground with your strengths.

…That was, of course, if Cartman could figure out what the fuck those were. No offense to you, he thought you were great, but… he thought you’d be dead weight here.

Lo and behold, your opening mouth surprised him again.

“What are you doing?”

“Making the slideshow.”

“Ohh. What are we doing it on again?”

“The trial of witches in colonial America.” You hummed, flipping through the book until you got to that section. Eric was pleasantly surprised at your work ethic, especially at things you didn’t understand. You asked plenty of questions, clarified repeatedly- you got that first set of slides done in about an hour.

“At this rate we’ll be done before everyone else.”

“Is that such a bad thing?” He chuckled at your reply, smiling like a dope when he saw your soft grin.

“I guess not.”

【☆】★【☆】

this. is cute i think ok byeeee

#south park #south park fanfiction #south park x y/n #leighwrites #south park x reader #south park x you #sp x reader #sp eric #sp eric cartman #sp cartman #eric cartman #eric cartman x reader #eric cartman x y/n #eric cartman x you #south park cartman #cartman #➳ Mail’s In!♡

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ratfuzz · 8 months

Text

✫stan, eric and kenny with kitchen witch reader headcanons✫

a/n: kyle one!! finally got to other boys. there's a liiittle bit of suggestive theme and drug joke in kenny one. characters are aged up, reader is gender neutral

stan marsh

doesn't really care about you being a kitchen witch, be who you want to be, believe in what you want to believe

making him special coffee/tea every morning

he started to hate waking up early a bit less (or maybe it's just you being by his side)

he's a kisser, he's a hugger, so expect at least one kiss on a cheek while you cook (will not hug you when you do this without consent tho)

s o u p

make him soup

or make soup with him together, that's nice too

with something silly like veggies in shape of something or just chicken and star soup

you two sometimes fight about who's making breakfast today, but you know, this is not serious of course (either way you win even if he's the one cooking it for the most part)

helps you carve or burn sigils in spoons and things

i'd say he needs the same thing as kyle, something with anti-anxiety spell, but also something that generally will help him with sleep

eric cartman

you probably picked him up by making something with a love spell (it would be funnier if it was blood love spell with espresso, but it would work better with a cake)

lmao, you didn't even have to put a spell on it, he's probably hooked just by your cooking

if you tell him about the fact that you're a witch he'd act like this all is total bullshit, but then ask if you can make something poisonous (of course you can, but it doesn't have to do anything with you been a kitchen witch) or with a curse ((don't fucking do it, though he loves you, it doesn't mean he will not turn you in to cops if something goes wrong i didn't tell you this))

prefers your pastry, but basically loves everything you make

likes looking at you while you cook (will not help you)

even more curious about sigils than kyle

but in the way that he doesn't really trust you (don't blame him, there's a lot of reasons for him to not trust people)

making sigils with eric, so he knows for sure meaning of them

tbh he's really impatient when it comes to you cooking, he doesn't understand why you prefer to take your time with cooking even if you can make it faster and doesn't listen when you explain

at least it looks like it

can bring up something you said later and it kind of surprises you

tries to be less bitchy with you later on

definitely asks you to make something for him with specific sigil for it

kenny mccormick

if you will not make him kfc wings recreation, i will haunt you in your dreams

doesn't really have a preference in your cooking

kenny is most likely the only one of main 4 to remember everything you say about witchery (he's just generally a good listener i think)

would make some type of sigil for shits and giggles (maybe literally)

love spells with emphasis on better sex life aren't needed, lol, but he would totally ask you for this as part of roleplay

ate all your donuts with sugar powder and tried to get away with it by saying that powder on his clothes is cocaine

if you cook together, he will always be distracted by your beauty, sometimes it's better to just let him sit in the kitchen with you

really likes how aprons look on you

so yeah another reason to wear them

any kind spell will do, boy needs more nice things in his life

making forever weed brownies together <3

a/n: honestly, i thought i will never write anything for kenny. wow. cool. we'll see, maybe i will make one with girls or butters/marjorine idkidk

#south park x reader #south park x y/n #south park x you #stan marsh x reader #stan marsh x y/n #stan marsh x you #eric cartman x reader #eric cartman x y/n #eric cartman x you #kenny mccormick x reader #kenny mccormick x y/n #kenny mccormick x you

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t0rturedangel · 1 year

Text

: ̗̀➛ ⚝ Ꞌꞌ : Яₑdₑₘₚₜᵢₒₙ

━ SOUTH PARK X FEM READER

PLOT ; no devil -or demon for that matter- has ever been given the gift of redemption, so what made you so special? and now that you're trying to save your soul, you've figured out just how hard it is to follow god's two simple rules, especially since everyone here seems to have a crush on you, and each other.

━ PARING(S) ; all x reader | everyone x everyone ( no parents x children | no siblings x siblings | basically no illegal ships )

━ TAGS ; adult au , humor ( i hope ) , angst , fluff , has ( kinda ) original plot , romance .

━ NOTES ;

☆ ➛ i made this for fun :)

☆ ➛ dont take much of this seriously

☆ ➛ Im gonna try my best to keep this going as much as i can

☆ ➛ The hell in this fanfic isnt the same canon one as the one in the actual show. This is my own custom hell

☆ ➛ this has interpolations ( i thinks this is the right word ) of religion, specifically Christianity.

☆ ➛ im british so most terms will be british ones :)

☆ ➛ more will be added if needed

━ THE STORY SO FAR . . .

☆ ➛ [ the prologue ] - 🔓

☆ ➛ [ chapters ] - 🔒

TAG LIST ; @ky-uwu @mishstuff @yanderesimp69711 [ if you'd like to be notified when the story starts / is updated just let me know ]

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that-damn-fouth-chaosemerald · 8 months

Note

Hi, if you still take requests I have an idea.

Cartman x Reader. Basically he becomes obsessed with reader, and kidnaps them so he can keep them all to himself.

I know it's stupid, but I just thought it was interesting, and in character.

You don't have to do this one if you don't want to. Also sorry if the idea seems creepy or disturbing.

Thanks for reading if you did! :)

See my masterlist here!

—❢—

×A/N×

Sorry for the long wait-

I wrote headcanons, because you didn't say anything about the type-

And my best and fastest writing work is usally headcanons so- lol

I hope you don't mind it! :")

×❢ About my work ❢×

no fluff, kidnapping, stalking, unhealthy relationship, petnames, no one dies, jealous Cartman, mention of self harm

Type: Headcanons

Fandom: South Park

Ship(s): only Cartman x reader

Character(s): Eric Cartman, You/The Reader/Y/N, Butters Scotch (mentioned), Kyle Broflovski (mentioned)

—❢—

(𝐘𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐞?) 𝐄𝐫𝐢𝐜 𝐂𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

(The picture is not mine!)

𝑺𝒐𝒏𝒈: Notice Me Senpai by iHasCupquake

“Senpai, I saw you at school today

Took your picture then I snuck away

I want you to notice me

but I'm just someone you don't notice still

I think I've got a rival I have to kill”

• he wasn't that kind of a person who falls people hard

• but you

• oh my gosh when he noticed your beautiful smile

• he felt as his heart missed a beat

• something got him

• damn, you were so beautiful

• too beautiful for the others...

• he gets jealous everytime when somebody speaks to you

• he will totally give a death stare or something like that

• (oh my gosh, poor Kyle and Butters)

• (and ofc the others)

• he will threat the person who talked to you

• he doesn't fear of they will tell you and you will think that he is a weirdo and etc.

• he doesn't fear of this, because he knows that they won't say anything – or even talk with you

• because he said so

• he will hurt you just to make sure that his plans go well

• he won't be scared to follow you

• when he can't hold himself any longer

• he will kidnap you

• he will definitely keep you in the basement

• just you and him.

• it's perfect.

• "You are so beautiful, Darling."

• he won't torture you

• he let you to take a bath, use the restroom, bring to you the meal and make for you a comfy bed

• he even makes or brings you your favourite food, drink, dessert, etc.

• he hates just one thing

• when you speak

• ofc, he will need the "yes, sir" answer when he asks "do you understand me?" or something like that

• but otherwise a "hm" will be enough for him

• will ask for kisses

• and will give you plushies for sleeping

• you have to ask permission before you do something

• "No, I didn't lock you. I just keep you safe, hon"

• he won't let you to harm yourself

• "Aww, don't do that, Honey." he looked at the scars that you made for yourself with the rope, after that he got you some medication.

• he won't let you go to go outside

• and if you try to escape

• oh my gosh, just don't.

• "Don't test me, dear." he said with a cold smile on his face as he squeezed your wrist threateningly.

#south park #south park x reader #sp x reader #sp #Eric Cartman #eric cartman x reader #eric cartman x y/n #eric cartman x you #eric cartman south park #eric cartman sp #cartman x reader #Cartman south park #x reader

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dollyyss · 5 months

Note

Main four + Butter and how they cuddle…?

Please don’t ever feel pressured to do these on spot <3!!!

Im just— Kyle is heavy on my brain rn. Hhhhggh.. I can’t stop thinking.. about.. him..

Also some of this may of gotten a bit.. nsfwish I apologize.

┌── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──┐

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

𝑲𝒀𝑳𝑬𝑺 𝑮𝑨𝑵𝑮 + 𝑩𝑼𝑻𝑻𝑬𝑹𝑺 𝑨𝑵𝑫 𝑯𝑶𝑾 𝑻𝑯𝑬𝒀 𝑪𝑼𝑫𝑫𝑳𝑬

𝙀𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙗𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙝𝙚𝙙 𝙧𝙚𝙡𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙝𝙞𝙥 ₊ ⊹

𝘼𝙡𝙡 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙨 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙖𝙜𝙚𝙙 𝙪𝙥! 𝙃𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙨𝙘𝙝𝙤𝙤𝙡 𝘼𝙐‧₊˚✩彡

𝙆𝙮𝙡𝙚, 𝙎𝙩𝙖𝙣, 𝙆𝙚𝙣𝙣𝙮, 𝘾𝙖𝙧𝙩𝙢𝙖𝙣 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝘽𝙪𝙩𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙨𐙚

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: nsfw

└── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──┘

Kyle 🐇𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒🪐

-Please.. Kyle’s got you in the goddamn honeymoon hug. You’re both facing each other, his arms are wrapped around your middle and yours wrapped around his neck. His legs and yours intertwined.

-He’s such a lover boy I can’t. His nose occasionally will press against yours, the two of you giggling and talking about anything and everything in such a gentle tone. Sometimes a whisper.

-He’ll do this normally, he just wants you close so he can tell you how much he loves you, how warm you are. How much he never wants to get up and could stay like this for hours. Kyle especially does this when it comes to movies. But.. it’s because he’s sleepy. If you’re helping him watch Ike while his parents are out, at some point Ike is put to bed, and Kyle suggests that maybe you two could watch a movie, something to pass the time but he says this as he’s already dragging himself around half asleep so you know what he means. He wants sleep, you can watch the movie. The minute you say yes his tall form is rushing over to the couch, squishing you into it while you both lay down. His back faces the tv, head cradled in your neck while yours rests on his shoulder to turn a movie on. His legs tangle with yours and just like that.. Kyle Broflovski is knocked the fuck out.

- He’s also the type of mother fucker to pull you back in if you try to get up. “No baby, just stay here. Please.” He’s mumbling, pressing kisses to your neck, those kisses turn into soft licks and nipping. His hands roaming more then they were 5 minutes ago. “Ky c’mon I’ll lay down with you, you wanted to cuddle” your ears heat up, fingers gripping his shoulders. He chuckles quietly, his fingers finding their way to your draw string. “M’sorry, I’ll stop.” He’s quiet for a moment. “Kiss?”

-He won’t ever really cuddle in public, but once you’re either at his or yours and studies are out of the way? he’s all over you.

-I may be obsessed with Kyle. Guys. I may.. be obsessed. Did I mention obsessed? I’m obsessed. Come to our wedding ;)

Stan .° ༘🎧⋆🖇₊˚ෆ

-I feel like Stan is a clingy cuddle type. And I mean, someone speaks to you? He’s latched and immediately pulling you into his lap to curl you up so he can rest his head on you, hands rubbing at your legs. Someone’s looking your way? Yup “give me your hand.” He’s gripping it and pulling you into him so he can lean against you, swaying softly while he hides his face on your shoulder or in your hair.

-He’s also the type to cuddle when he’s drunk. “hic hiiii~ you look, so good right now.. hic” he’ll find the comfiest spot to lay you, practically flopping on top of you and mumbling on and on about whatever goes through that dumb brain of his. He’ll pass out sooner or later but before he does make sure to give him a gentle lil kiss to his messy dyed blonde hair, catch him smiling like a dumb idiot with that dopey face, cheeks red and warm

-He tends to come cuddle when he’s had a shit day and his father is just being an actually fucking dick. He’ll sneak into your room, tripping over shit but trying to be as quiet as possible. When he finds your bed he takes his shoes off and slips into the sheets with you, his head popping up between your arms, his hands under your shirt. “Hm?” You wake suddenly not sure who was in the bed at the moment, though the voice was enough to tell you it was Stan. “Hey hey, shh, it’s just me babe” his hand squeezes your side softly. “Just wanted to get away from dad.” He mumbles before feeling you bring him closer to you. Suddenly, he very quickly realized. In that moment. You were his home.

-He’s not horribly crazy about cuddling, you really just have to catch him at the right time. Either you let him come to you or sometimes if you come to him, he’s already ready for you. It really just depends on his day.

Kenny ₊˚🕯️🖤❀༉

-If there is ever a time where Kenny has his hands off of you for a long period of time. Something is wrong. So cuddling is a must in your relationship with him.

-Kenny will cuddle anywhere, and I mean anywhere. This could be at school, an outing with his friends, at a restaurant, outside. Literally everywhere. As long as his hands are on you in some type of way he’s content.

-I’m sorry but.. cuddling with Kenny will result in some sort of sexual activity. Unless he’s tired, or.. stoned. If he’s tired, he’s sprawled all over you drooling and getting the best sleep of his god damn life, his arm is sprawled over your chest, his head is half off your shoulder and one leg is hunched up just below your stomach. If he’s stoned he’s got your head on his chest, one arm around your shoulder while the other is behind his head. He’s spewing none sense but.. he’s making you laugh so it’s all that matters to him.

-….cockwarming. Cough.

- “c’mon please?! I promise I won’t do anything” there’s a pause between the two of you “Kenny? Fine but nothing more, I wanna lay down” he’s nodding his head intensely, impatiently waiting for you get under his covers, following you quickly as he watches your slip your pants and underwear off, pushing them to the side. He’s quick to do the same, his tongue out like a panting dog as he slips in, his teeth biting down onto your shoulder as you both let out a pleasurable moan. Kenny’s fingers trace up and down your arms, soothing you. He honest to god probably falls asleep like this, snuggled into your back and whimpering occasionally at any sudden movement. His hand rests at your waist, soft snores leaving his lips.

Cartman 🎧✮🧺✧˖°

-“Do you want me to die?! Is that what you’re saying right now?! Wow, well fine, I’ll just keep warm with someone else” cartman crosses his arms, watching you cock his brow at him, “cuddle, you mean” he cocks his eyebrow back, “keep warm.” You let out a snicker “righttt, just admit it Cartman you wanna cuddle there’s nothing wrong with that”

-He doesn’t like to admit it but he loves your cuddles. We all know cartman is on the chubbier side so he’s actually really nice to cuddle with, he’s warm, soft, and actually just really relaxing to cuddle up to.

-He won’t really notice it but his hands tend to pull you closer, rubbing your legs, arms, occasionally running his fingers through your hair. Depends on how you lay, but typically you’re at his either of his sides, he tells you nonsense stories until you fall asleep and when you do. He’ll pull out his phone to take a few quick pictures of you, saving it in his folder he has specially for you. Yeah he can be a sweetheart, shut up.

-The only time he’ll ask for genuine cuddles is when he’s sick. He’s a man baby when he’s sick and you can’t change my mind. “Y/nnnnnnnnn” he’ll be so whiny, giving the stupid ass pout to make you do what he asks. You’re sure he’ll ask you for soup which you’d gladly make but when he asks for a cuddle you’re quite surprised. It doesn’t take you long to find your way under his sheets, sitting slightly up right so he can rest against you. Your fingers rummage through his hair, scratching at his scalp and massaging his temples. He really does appreciate it, and he’ll make it up to you. …at some point.

Butters ˚☆🐈*๑

-Like Stan he’s the clingy cuddling type. But not in like a jealous way just more, he just wants you around him so he’ll cuddle you to keep you there.

-if you two are ever out with friends or even doing something with his parents if he doesn’t have your touch he literally goes insane. He tries to find anyway to touch you, his foot touching your leg, his hand trying to find your hand, trying to move closer to you, literally anything to at least feel you.

-But when he has the chance to have his hands on you he’s a giggling mess. He likes to be the little spoon, he likes feeling you all squished up to his back, your hands around him so his hands can hold yours. He’ll curl up slightly as well, finding any sense of your warmth. If this mf could be in your skin. He would. He just wants you as close as you can get. If he ends up falling asleep, at some point he’s turned around, face squished between your arms that are hugging his head, your body latched around him and he could not be happier with the way he woke up.

-He likes to kiss when cuddling. His hand will be moving your hair out of the way while he presses kisses to your face. At times you hide it from him, shy at the way he just can’t stop pressing kisses to your face. “Aw jeez, don’t hide from me! It’s only a little kiss darlin” he uses his nose to brush against your hands, trying to push them apart because he wants to kiss your lips.

-like Kyle, once you’re cuddling. You’re trapped. He’s not letting you up for anything. Unless you really have to use the bathroom then if that’s the case he feels bad for keeping you locked in his arms. “Oh but please be quick okay! I still want cuddles!”

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qtkat · 1 year

Text

being eric cartman’s babysitter would include…

gender: female she/her (being referred to as a girl, as well)

warnings: use of y/n (I KNOW OKAY)

request: nope

a/n: thank you all so much for the likes and reblogs on my first post! i appreciate more than you’d think haha. these headcanons are set when you’ve been his babysitter for a while now, and are based on actually liking you, since i love the mother/older sister figure and eric dynamic (and also i don’t think there’d be much to write about if eric hated you, other than if it’s an enemies to friends i guess lol). also if you want these type of hcs for any of the others just lmk! also wanted to lyk i was fucking smacked writing this, so if there’s any mistakes tell me and i’ll fix them.

- eric dragging you along with him everywhere

- like genuinely dragging you by the wrist and booking it type

- he’s probably tried to take you to school with him

- the bell rings when you were just done getting ready for school and he’s just standing there like ‘ 😃 ‘

- you’re just staring back at him confused

- after a while he’s like “well, are you gonna put on your jacket?”

- FULLY SERIOUS

- and you’re like “what”

- and he just sighs, head down, pinching his nose, “jesus y/n, just puT THE DAMN COAT ON.” (squealing like a little piggy btw)

- “christ, okay - okay.”

- you have one arm in as you’re dragged down the path leading up to your house

- he forced you to drive and you were honestly so disoriented you just did it

- he marches into school, jaw locked dude 😭😭

- everyone is staring, like mr mackey fully stopped in his tracks but didn’t say anything

- mr garrison is so confused bro 😭

- “eric!”

- “yeees” (aka yiiiis)

- “why did you bring a teenage girl with you to school?!!!??”

- ofc you had to leave, because duh??

- don’t worry too much though, the little gremlin made your exit very dramatic

- full on screaming punching the ground at you slowly back away

- i read once about eric dragging out your name like he does his moms, and he does that here too

- has probably accidentally called you mom once (we don’t talk about that)

- you guys have sleepovers

- it’s actually so cute, whenever you’re set to come to his house he gets so excited

- like he’s so hyper the whole day of the sleepover

- his mother is not to disturb

- you improvise stories about clyde frog for him all night, setting up a theater with the plushie in hand

- now presenting: eric and clyde frog go to space

- .. -or the wild west, taking over the world, etc.

- he always opens up to you so much at these sleepovers

- like just fully starts telling you about how hard he has it without a dad

- has cried in your arms multiple times (we don’t talk about that)

- you were so there during the stick of truth

- you’re like an alchemist or a red mage (or a combination, if they’ll allow that)

- this is how you formally meet the other boys

- they like you, even though they didn’t really talk with you too much

- i think it’s pretty obvious to everyone eric is a jealous person, so he wouldn’t like sharing your attention much (hence you not really talking to the other boys)

- if you ever need to go away for an extended amount of time he will freak

- tries to manipulate you into staying like how he did his mom in the real estate episode

- also you better hope he’s the only kid you’re babysitting

- oh boy if he finds out you’re babysitting, like, butters or something he would throw a fit

- i swear

- so in conclusion you have gained 10 extra bucks an hour and a child making you hang out with him 24/7

- you guys have a sweet relationship

#south park #sp eric #eric cartman #sp cartman #south park x reader #eric cartman x reader #eric cartman x you #south park fanfiction #eric cartman fanfiction #qtkat writes

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h-harleybaby · 6 months

Note

MAKING OUT WITH THE MAIN 4 💏

I’ve done making out w/ Butters, Kenny and Kyle so I’ll just be doing Stan and Cartman!!

Making out w/ Stan and Cartman

Stan

• He thinks he knows what he’s doing but believe me babe, he doesn’t. You have to teach that poor poor man and pray that Randy doesn’t walk in and make everything awkwarder than it is (he most probs does regardless because he has no sense of personal space)

• It’s like training a dog because you kinda have to train him to not do that throwing up thing he has a habit of. Good luck with that hun, you’ll need it

• Pull him in by the belt loops, he’ll absolutely melt. Stan’s the type to religiously wear jeans so making him melt literally anywhere is just that much easier

• He’s a very physical person in general, don’t be surprised if he intertwines your fingers when y’all make out. The moment you cup/stroke his cheek when y’all do, he’s practically wrapped around your finger

• For some reason, Stan’s the type to be playing music when y’all make out. Scratch that, he’s the type to be playing music whenever he’s with you regardless.. it just so happens he has a make out playlist for you guys because he just chronically listens to it

• Sooooo stiff the first few times it’s almost concerning, like does he even wanna make out rn?! He does!! Poor Stan just doesn’t wanna feel creepy if he moves his hands literally anywhere besides your waist

• Obvi he gets over it.. after a long time, a really really long fucking time. But anyways, his fav place to have his hands is your cheeks and maybe sometimes they find their hand in your hair. It’s so soft compared to his greasy ass hair like omg

• Stan kisses really softly and I take no criticism on that. Well soft and really awkwardly, he really only ever kissed Wendy before and she wasn’t one to be all too physical like he was

• He has really chapped lips because he literally always forgets to put on chapstick despite always having some in his pocket. I’m fully convinced it got gross because he left it in his jean pockets when they eventually got washed and kept them there for the next 4 fucking washes

• He’s a solid 6/10 on a kissing scale, just teach the poor man… PLEASE!!!!!

Cartman

• Honestly the type to let you sit on his lap, and he will NOT let you get up. He’ll probably say you’re heavy and you’re suffocating him but that grip he has on your thighs says otherwise

• As ALWAYS he uses his weight as an advantage. Sometimes when the 2 of you are laying down he’ll drop himself on top of you so he can kiss you as much as he wants because he’s mean like that

• Cartman is genuinely the type to make you put on a bunch of chapstick before he lets you make out with him. Soft lips, super rough kisses. I don’t make the rules and no I will not be taking any questions

• ^^ Has to be flavored chapstick too, like those dumb mtn dew ones

• Don’t ask why, but he’s actually a good kisser and it’s totally definitely ABSOLUTELY not because he has practice kissing the mirror and a Justin Timberlake cardboard cut out.. totally not. THE CUT OUT IN HIS CLOSET IS JUST A COINCIDENCE HE SWEARS

• For the love of god don’t make out in his room. Much like Randy, Liane doesn’t have much of a sense of personal space either. Not to mention the other plushies he’s collected over the years. Like yeah Clyde frog and the others aren’t there but eventually he probs gets more and they just stare at y’all

• Perfume drives him nuts, especially those sweeter smelling ones. Hands trembling a bit and everything, he definitely makes it a point to either be gripping some part of you or have his hands behind your back so it’s not noticeable

• Think it’s obvious by now but his fav place to have his hands is your thighs, he’s definitely leaving marks too. Honestly kinda the type to pinch them and laugh when you whine about it

• It’s always super obvious when y’all make out because not only is he always bragging about it, he PURPOSELY leaves you a mess after. I’m talking makeup smudged and marks all over you. Cartman so actually has no fucking chill. Absolutely always can and WILL go into gruesome detail about how you guys make out. He’s in it to make Kyle gag and Kenny drool.

• Good 8/10 on the kissing scale. He gets points knocked off because he can be really mean and super embarrassing. Stupidly good kisser tho

#h harleybaby needs help #harley won’t shut her mouth #harley’s anons <33 #south park x reader #south park x reader headcanons #south park x y/n #eric cartman x reader #cartman x reader #cartman x y/n #eric cartman x reader headcanons #Cartman x you #eric cartman x you #stan marsh x you #stan x you #stan x reader #stan marsh x reader #Stan marsh x y/n #Stan marsh x reader headcanons #harley’s requests!

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kenlvry · 1 year

Note

LISTEN TO ME RN HEAT ME TF OUT STANS GANG + CRAIG DOIGN THE LIPSTICK TREND FROM TICTOK WITH READER

the lipstick trend with stan and craigs team

an, I AM LISTENLING ANON DONT WORRY. no idea what you mean by heat out though 🤨 , 17-18 and gn reader but use of her in tolkiens

kenny

he was the one who suggested it, it came across his fyp one day and he sent it to you "lets do this come over rn." "you asked, why dont you come to my house? 🤨" "why don't i cum in your mom" "HUH 😧" "im here."

you both definitely argue on what lipstick you should wear "okay but i don't even use pink lipstick" "well you should" "its light colour its not gonna appear" "well fuck 😒"

the process of kissing his face is wild, he would suggest to do his lips as the first place "KENNY HOW ARE WE GONNA DO THIS TREND IF YOU KEEP TRYING TO MAKE OUT WITH ME" "ITS NOT MY FAULT"

after like2 hours you finally get the lipstick on his face. now the tiktok was even harder he wouldn't stop laughing. you'd give up and he apologises while laughing

thank god you guys were able to finish it under 1 hour it turned out really good, at the end of the video he kissed you and you wanted to cut that part but he said keep it for like and its true the comments were all about the kiss on the last clip

kyle

okay he too wanted to ask you first but he was kinda shy and waited for you to ask and you did!! woohoo for kyle

"kyle wanna do this" "OKAY" he insists on picking your lipstick and picks the ugliest colour like what 😐

to him there was no such thing as an ugly colour buy it didn't suit your face so no way.

the process of it was calm, he at first wanted to put on the lipstick for you but you looked like a clown has mans never put on lipstick??

he watches you as you kiss him and reapply lipstick and then kiss him again, he feels like a princess fr 🤭🤭

he hasn't seen his face yet so when you record and he saw his face he laughs out loud, "LMAO WHY DO I LIKE THAT??" "WDYM"

you would tell him to take off his hat which he refuses but you looked too cute, when it posted cartman was first to comment and you can already tell what he commented "ew gay" your followers defended you two though 🤭

stan

stan blushes internally when you ask him. "sure im down" DEEP DOWN HE WANTS KIDNAP YOY AND KEEP YOU TO HIMSELF

"what lipstick do you think matches me best, pink or red?" "id say my tip colour" "WHAT 😧"

he has to hold in the very urge to puke every time you kiss him because like you look so cute omg.

he looks in the mirror and is js like "damn, i did it". HE LOVES IT SOOOO MUCH YOU CAN TELL HE'S BLUSHING ONGG ‼️

he even directs you like "do here next, okay now here" its so cute 🤭🤭

when you record and the camera pans to him, he smiles and covers his face blushing bc he can't contain it. it was such a cute video and got iver 2 mil likes. cartman definitely commented "i bet you had to change your clothes 10 times"

cartman

"cartman lets do this" "what." "wdym? cmon its cute" "y/n no offense but that is the most gayest shit i've ever seen" " NO ITS NOT UTS CUTE" "my reputation is at stake if i do that be so for real" "okay I'm asking kyle then" "lets do it."

he actually been wanting to ask you for weeks now but doesn't know how so winwin. you take your absolute time picking your lipstick and he couldn't be more done with "hurry up this doesn't even effect anything" "shut up cartman if i use the right one people will ask what lipstick it is and i get views"

picking a lipstick was already a big deal just imagine the process "ew gay not on my lips" "cartman 😐" tbh he wish he could just make out with you rn but yk how mans is

now recording is even more a hassle "JUST SMILE IS IT SO HARD TO CRACK A SMILE" "NOT WHILE IM LOOKING LIKE THIS" the most he does is wipes your lipstick off and then he just gives a 🙄 look until the end of the video

the comments are just him getting teased at clydes commenting "NAHHH CAN'T BELIEVE HE AGREED TO THIS" kyles is "i can tell that this took a long time" and then wendys is "is that cartman or a clone of him". cartman is pissed af at the comment, he told you his reputation is at stake 😒.

he actually has it saved downloaded and also is his live wallpaper sooo.

butters

butters is the one who asked you this " um y/n can we do this? 😣" while twiddling his fingers, "OKAY"

he's all giddy and smily during the process, after every kiss his blushes intensifies and by the end of it he is just.. 🔴

even though it is the most simplest video ever he has to have a tutorial, he is asking questions for everything man, how do i wipe the lipstick, what do i do, do i smile when its on me , do i laugh??

you tell him what he thinks he should he and he starts kissing you bc rn the sexual tension between you two is intense (to him atleast, he thinks thinks hand holding is already intense)

everyone comments on how cute he is and yk how tiktok is so people comment "does he whimper" "submissive who?" and hes likw WHATTTTT 🧍

clyde

when you suggested this he nodded so hard his head probably was about to fall off. "clyde you wanna do this" "DO I???" ..... "well.. do you?" "i mean yeah it's like a way of- yes i wanna do it"

he loves any lipstick you wear so he lets you pick. after every kiss he looks in the mirror and kicks his feet giggling and you just stand there 🤨

he also tries to make it a makeout session like kenny, when you kissed on his lips he holds your neck and literally makes out with like cnon we have 9 more

when you first hit record and yk how the guy has to wipe your lipstick off, nah he grabbed you by the chin and slams his lips with yours "WHY DIS YOU DO THAT??" "its called content,you wouldn't know with your 9 likes and 70 views"

well you kept the clip and everyone in the comments were talking about it "need a boyfriend like you y/n" "why can't my boyfriend be like this" clyde is obviously gloating bc he had the idea.

tolkien

most romantic man you know, is the first to ask you. "y/n can we do this?" "OKAY BOO 😝"

"hmm which lipstick do you think babe?" "i think every lipstick makes you pretty, it doesn't matter if it doesn't suit you because in my eyes you look beautiful in anything ☺️" "what if i wore kim kardashians 2013 met gala dress" "might have to rethink what i said"

he smiles while you kiss him here and there, every once a while he kisses you back, it was such a cute moment for you two😝🤞🤞

when recording he looks at you while smiling during the whole video and it blew up fast because of that

"the way he looks at her" "wishing he was like this" "you got the bag that man is inlove", it blew in seconds fr

craig

"craig lets do-" "okay" "i didnt even ask you yet" "I'll do anything if its with you" "what if i asked you to have a threesome" ".....if its makes you happy idk.."

idk about you but i think he acts like he doesn't care but inside he is so happy you asked he's been wanting to ask you this but doesn't know how to start up the convo

he doesn't care what lipstick or where you kiss him, its just the way you press your lips on him and look at it then quickly reapply to do it again because it wasn't pigmented enough.

when recorded, he doesn't just wipe he makes you turn to face him by grabbing your chin, and he doesn't let go and just looks at you with those yk siren eyes.

people are simping over him ong "damn girlie share for us" "you mean OUR boyfriend" "tryna find someone as hot as him" and you are pissed fr he laughs at you cursing out the people, like bae dw my eyes only fo you 😝🤞

tweek

"tweek, wanna do this?" "but what if I can't remove the lipstick stain" "tweek what dw i have makeup remover" "WHAT IF THAT DOESN'T WORK 🤯🤯" "TWEEK"

okay so the lipstick may turn out ugly bc of how shaky he is but ITS OKAY BC ITS TWEEK DUH, "a-are you sure you dont want to redo this?" "tweek its fine"

he insists on redoing it the 2nd try turns our worse because he's even more twitchy because of how close you are☺️☺️☺️

his face is just red because he keeps wiping it off with his hands so you can redo it and its obvious too

recording it was so funny because you can't stop laughing at the smudge lipsticks

when posted the comments were so cute but... uh questionable some were "the way the smudges are so obvious 😭😭❤️" or "wishing my future relationship will be like this 🤭" and some were just "tip colour when?? 😜"

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just-mya-writing · 1 year

Text

“Would you still love me if I was a worm?” ~ South Park Boys

I was in the middle of writing something completely different when this idea hit me like a metal bat. I will not offer an explanation, but I will make this a series. I’m half sorry

SP boys x gn!reader

Stan

It’s a cold, rainy night and the two of you are lounging lazily on his couch

you were meant to go home a little over two hours ago, but Stan’s car is practically frozen and broke down on the way to work yesterday and you refuse to walk back in the freezing rain

instead, you and your boyfriend were content cuddling together, enjoying each others company

resting on his chest, you could hear his steady heartbeat, lulling you into a sense of security and safety

sighing through your nose, you snuggled up closer to Stan as he tightened his grip around your waist while his other hand scrolled endlessly on YouTube shorts

he’s watching Minecraft videos

looking up at him, you softly break the comfortable silence

“hey Stan...?”

“hm?” he looks away from his phone, the smallest hint of a smile on his lips as he pressed them against the top of your head

“Would you still love me if I was a worm?”

he’s silent

stunned

he expected you to say something cute or cheesy, not something a middle school girl would ask her boyfriend

“...yes.”

“you hesitated” you pointed out, sitting up slightly

“well. I had, uh, had to...to think about it first” he stuttered, trying to figure out what you want to hear

“you had to think about if you love me?” you tilted your head to the side, trying to hold back a smile

“I do! I love you, even if you were a worm!” his panicked voice squeaked out, pulling you closer to him so your face was burred in the crock of his neck

he smiled when he felt you giggle against his skin

“no matter what or where you are, I’ll always love you...you know that” he whispered, running his hand over the back of your head

you didn’t even need to answer him, you both knew the answer

“...my little worm”

he snickered

well shit

new pet name unlocked

he gets you one of those fuzzy noodle worms on a string for your birthday

your his little worm now

be the best worm you can be

Kyle

he had taken you out to eat

he wasn’t paying attention when you mentioned you wanted to eat him out but you forgive him

picking up your tray of food, you brought it to the outside table Kyle had spent fifteen minutes picking out, cuz it just had to be perfect

you smiled at the red head as you sat down, picking up his drink and handing it over

“hey Kyleee...” you started, watching his entire face break out into a smile

“yesss...” he responded in the same sing-song tone of voice, picking up a straw

“Would you still love me if I was a worm?”

his smile dropped

a look of confusion took its place

he wrinkled his nose

“the fuck?”

“would you still love me if I was a worm?” you repeated simply, taking a sip of your own drink

“why would you be a worm?”

you shrugged

“it could happen” you reasoned, hiding your smile behind your cup

“no it can’t, you can’t just randomly turn into a worm” he argued, fiddling with the unopened straw

“I could end up drinking a...worm turning into potion”

he just looked at you with a deadpan stare

you took a long sip of your drink

“..oh no, I think the café accidentally gave me a worm turning into potion” you gasped, looking between your drink and Kyle

he opened one end of his straw, putting his lips to the exposed plastic tube and blowing, causing the paper wrapped around to hit you squarely in the forehead

“my poor little worm head...” you pouted, finally causing a snort out of your boyfriend

the rest of your lunch was mostly uneventful, the two of you chatting and people watching

a few hours later, at your house, your taking your sweater out of the dryer

Kyle spilled food on it, he said he’s sorry

Kyle walked up behind you, wrapping his arms around you for a quick hug and kissing your temple

“...yeah” he muttered before walking away

“yeah what?” you called after him, confused

“Yeah, I would love you if you were a worm” he smiled before rounding a corner “don’t let it go to your head” he added from down the hall

too late

your ego has been boosted and the smile won’t leave your face

he’d be the best boyfriend a worm could have

Kenny

laughing his ass off

help him

he’s going to choke on his gum and die again

you both were sitting on his bed

but now he’s practically rolling on the floor

his contagious laughter making you struggle to contain your giggles

“aha...wha, what did you...” he took a deep breath, tears nearly forming in his eyes “can you repeat the question?” he finally managed to say

you took a deep breathe of your own, trying to contain your laughter

“Would you still love me if I was a worm?”

once again he erupted into a fit of laughter, just like when you first asked him

you’re not sure what you were expecting him to do or say when you asked, but it surely wasn’t a reaction like this

he suddenly stopped, sitting up and looking into your eyes, deathly serious

“I can’t fuck a worm”

now it was your turn to laugh

the laughter that came from the both of you could probably be heard from outside, not helped by the fact that Kenny was making things worse

“wait wait wait...” he shuffled over to you, hands on your shoulders “what if I...hahaha, what if I was a worm too.” he snickered, almost unable to finish his thought. “We’d have hot worm sex!”

you couldn’t even respond to him as his laughter started to mix into him coughing his lungs out, leaning onto you for support

he thought he was so funny

you started to gently rock him back and forth

“Kenny, Kenny, you didn’t answer the question!” you reminded him

“I can’t” he squeaked, voice growing horse

his arms were now wrapped snugly around your body and you could do nothing but shake your head, running your hand through his fluffy blonde hair

his laughter slowly died down, his head still stuck on your shoulder as he squeezed you

“I dunno, would you love me if I was a worm?” he giggled

“hmm...no” you joked, earning a little nip on your neck from him in protest

“well that’s unfortunate...cuz I’d love you, even if you were the ugliest worm in the dirt”

you rolled your eyes

“excuse you, I’d be a hot worm” you smiled

he lifted his head up and kissed your cheek

“I’d make you a little worm house, and sing you little worm songs at night, and carry you around with me in my parka...” he rambled, small ghosts of of kisses being peppered around your face

“alright, alright I get it” you conceded, feeling your face heat up from the relentless kisses

“nooo, my perfect partner needs to know that they’d be the perfect worm”

he’s not letting you go

keeps telling you how he’d care for you if you were a worm

wants to cuddle like worms

its just him laying on top of you

you can’t move

it’s fine

Cartman

“abso-fucking-lutely not”

“Cartman!”

“I barely love you now”

“Cartman.”

“What kind of stupid question is that, dumbass?”

“Eric”

he’s in trouble and he knows it but doesn’t care

he needs you to know how stupid your question was

why a worm?

why would you even be a worm?

why would you ask him in the middle of watching a horror movie?

would saying yes make him some kind of furry?

these are the questions that plague his mind while you’re lecturing him

hope you weren’t expecting him to pay attention

“I’m not even attracted to worms, stupid, I’m attracted to you”

Cartman is a self claimed yousexual

he’s only got the hots for you and you only

no worms allowed

you’re a moronsexual

now actively steps on worms when it rains

no slimy worm in going to steal his partner if he has anything to say about it

Butters

starts tearing up

starts thinking the worst

what if while your cuddling he accidentally crushes you

what if a bird comes and swoops you up while you guys are having a picnic

do worms have lips? could he still kiss you?

maybe he could kiss your little worm head

oh gee how long do worms live for??

his thoughts are swirling and he doesn’t know what to do besides mildly panic

he promises he’ll be the best boyfriend a worm could ask for

he’ll try his best to keep you happy

“oh, please don’t leave me for a hotter, more capable worm”

you’re gonna have to explain it’s a joke before he starts googling ‘what to do when the love of my life turns into a worm’

bless his heart

#south park #south park x reader #stan marsh #stan marsh x reader #kyle brovlofski #kyle broflovski x reader #kenny mccormick #kenny mccormick x reader #eric cartman #eric cartman x reader #southpark butters #butters x reader #stan x reader #kyle x reader #kenny x reader #so many tags #would you still love me if i was a worm

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