What's Behind The Mask

What feels like forever ago, there was this podcast called Fetish Flame (RIP) that had its hosts get a little into hypnosis when they were winding down. It was pretty good and one of the things that happened near the end was that they experimented with the Nova Pro 100 and a hood at the same time, due to its bright lights. For some reason I remembered this recently and I brought it up to @dommestic, so on Sunday morning we gave it a shot. She bought what I assume is some sort of spandex hood with a reenforced, built-in eye mask which blocks most of the light from the outside, but if my eyes are open I can see traces of the blinky lights through it. And brother/sister/sibling, let me tell you, it makes it hard to think during and after.

If you've never used the Nova Pro 100 (which I believe is the most deadly consumer-grade brainwashing machine 1994 had to offer, who should probably be paying me for the plugs some day) it's a very old-school gizmo with red LEDs on a metal box that connects to headphones, LED-enabled eyewear, and if you're so inclined, a microphone/audio input so someone can talk to you or you can play audio. It's pre-Bluetooth and I think the first version of this might be pre-internet. (We didn't get one until almost 10 years ago.) I got trained on it a lot, so I tend to drop pretty quick and pretty hard, although we haven't used it as much lately. (I'm hoping this changes now that it's not Obscenely Hot All the Time.)

The hood added some surprising effects. For starters it was more like I was trapped in my head and that submissive headspace. We don't have much in the way of kink apparel or collars or some such. As such, I was not entirely prepared for the sensation that despite the back-to-back hypnosis sessions being over, I was going to be pretty much in ultra-submissive-headspace mode for quite some time, which resulted in a very happy dominant, surprisingly so, to the extent of "I wonder if this is going to be a regular thing." Trying to fill various demands while blindfolded should be a challenge but I don't remember having any real difficulty with it.

It's cozy. It's tight. Should I be wearing more restrictive things for her enjoyment? I guess I'll need more research or serendipitous blog posts to find out.

How are you all doing?

saw a post on twt that says “dick is nice but has your man ever sat you in his lap, kept eye contact with you and fingered you to tears” and i legit get turned on because that's so brendon like and he's probably whispering dirty shit in your ears too like "you like that, baby? you look so pretty when you cry for me." and now im also crying

Ooof. Not my jam, but no judgment.

I just don’t really read Brendon as a person like that…I mean, maybe he’d make me cry inadvertently from how much I was begging for it, but that’s only on his dommest of days. And then I bet he’d go all soft and give me whatever I wanted 😂

I feel like the Big Dom™️ energy is mostly stage Brendon or immediate post-show Brendon. Regular life, he is so soft and smol and just wants to make you feel good and praise you.

twice needs a strong dominating woman in his life because even though he is the perfect sub, he is capable of such feral fucking that only he can turn the dommest of doms into his personal little cockhungry whore in this essay i will

Chakotay! For the character headcanon thing! ☺️

----How I feel about Chakotay:

Beautiful cinnamon roll, too good for this - oh wait, that's Commander Chakotay, the consummate friend and first officer who never lets you see how much strain he's under. Captain Chakotay is a grim-faced, self-sacrificial freedom fighter who doesn't baulk at getting his hands dirty for a Cause. Then there's Alpha Chakotay, who's an angel in the streets and a demon in the sheets. Then there's Homesteading Chakotay, who's like a cross between Westley from the Princess Bride and Mr Darcy, but with wood. And Spiritual Chakotay, who I honestly pretend doesn't exist most of the time. Why so many Chakotays, you ask? Because the writers didn't know shit so we have to fill in the many blanks and inconsistencies and hints they left us.

All the people I ship romantically with Chakotay:

1. Kathryn Janeway, naturally. All that unacknowledged (but not unrequited, okay) pining wears on a man's spirit, but the pure romance of it, oh my god, I'm 15 again and watching A Room with a View. Except George got more action than Chakotay does. Well, not in my fics.

2. I'll have to go with Tom Paris, for the reasons I gave in my other answer. Conflict is sexy.

3. I'm gonna say it... Seven of Nine. But in a universe where Chakotay got closure with Janeway, and he and Seven actually grew to like each other and it happened organically and made a certain amount of sense. I'm never going to call this an OTP, but I'm liking it more and more.

4. Ayala. Deeds done in darkness, rough n' ready and not a whole lot of talking.

5. Tessa Omond. Honestly? I love Tessa. I love the fics I've read that give her substance and a reason for being so damn self-sacrificing when she doesn't have a stake in the whole time reset thing. She loves Chakotay like Chakotay loves Janeway, and it's sad and beautiful and noble and in some universes out there, he decides to stop sacrificing his present for a past that should have happened and make a new life with her and they're happy.

My BroTP for Chakotay:

I love Chakotay & Tuvok for the same reason I love Chakotay & Paris (except without the sexual tension and with added rivalry over Janeway's favour). But Chakotay & B'Elanna is my BroTP.

My unpopular opinion about Chakotay:

I wish they'd left the whole mysticism thing out of it. He had enough complexity without it, if they'd only developed that backstory a little. Oh, maybe that's not such an unpopular opinion... Okay, how's this? Chakotay is the Dommest of the Doms. He'll have you kneeling at his feet begging to give him anything he wants, he'll keep you on the brink of orgasm for hours, and he doesn't give a shit who thinks he's subby because he's entirely and deservedly confident in his own alpha status in the boudoir. Hahaha. Ask me about my J/C bdsm headcanons.

One thing I wish had happened with Chakotay in canon:

Just one? Okay, I'll go with character development.

----Thanks, @little-tayy!

I was asleep when this ask frenzy was happening, so please feel free to select an alternate for anything you've already answered: 8, 9, 11, 14

Hee- I was too! :) 

8. How do you feel when hypnotised?

I tend to feel really relaxed and loose and heavy. I often imagine the hypnotist’s voice as being somewhere physically in the top of my head. My thoughts tend to get VERY slow and disconnected and stay that way even for a while after the session. I feel really focused and able to redirect away from the stray thoughts that flit through my mind. I often get very annoyed when someone asks me to answer a complicated question because I have to bring myself out of feeling trancey in order to re-engage my brain and answer it. It’s the same with following most suggestions. It’s hard for me to re-engage my brain in this way without getting super analytical about things like the hypnotist’s technique. 

9. How do you feel when you hypnotise someone else?

Also very focused- but in a way that allows for much more free flow of thoughts and ideas. If things are going well, I feel powerful and confident. It’s often much easier for me to talk and explain things when I’m hypnotizing someone- I tend to fumble in real life and feel like I have to rush through my parts of a conversation for fear of boring/annoying others. Doing hypnosis is one of the few times I feel like I have the space to slow down and speak thoughtfully.

 11. What’s your ‘signature move’ as a hypnotist?

I’d be really curious to ask other people this! If I’ve hypnotized you, please let me know if you think I have a ‘signature move’! 

If I were to guess on a ‘signature move’, I would say my pacing is pretty different than a lot of people’s. I tend to be pretty fast paced and kind of flow concepts and words into each other in a way that I don’t hear others doing as much. I also don’t really feel like I have a hypnotist’s voice- or at least not one that is markedly different than my normal tone- just a hypnotist's cadence. So that’s a signature style (if not a signature move). 

I’m also pretty amused at myself that I wrote above about using hypnotizing as a way to slow down and yet the pace of my slowing down is still pretty quick. :)

14. Answered here!

Thanks @dommestic!

it is still sooo unbelivable to me how this man can SCREAM Dom but also hella Sub energy at the same time??? Like his duality is INSANE such as his stage presence and his vibes in general. I could go on for days how much he's making me turn delulu

EXACTLY I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR SOMEONE TO MENTION THIS. Ever since I started stanning Ateez I was all for Wooyoung and I still am but he is literally making me go insane. And I thought I was the only one who thought that he was the dommest dom as well as the subbiest sub in the universe. As someone who is the subbiest person in the world, fact I feel that I could so easily dom Wooyoung is so confusing. I actually considered making a blog just to go on about him because he is unfair. I'm on the delulu train with you, I'm in the same cabin simping over him. Also Thanxx Wooyoung still lives in my head rent free and I hate it

And back to the delulu thing he is literally the only idol who I think is out of my league but also there is a minor chance I could date him and that I'm in his league. So while I'm not delulu he makes me rethink my life and my brain is this whole meme

Introduction

Hello.  You might know me as @dommestic.  I have been blogging about my hypnosis-related exploits there, and will continue to do so.  However, I wanted a separate space to explore something that is similar-but-different.

I am in a D/s relationship with my lovely husband, @dommesticpet.  He’s a strong man, a total cutie and sweetheart, who happens to love submitting to me.  I wouldn't say that dominance comes naturally, but I am absolutely getting the hang of it.  

Anyway, I’m a little bit addicted to reading about self improvement.  I have been known to lament the fact that I don’t have my own D-type to give my life structure, as I am lacking self control and tend to be easily distracted.  Sounds like a sweet deal.  Charts and graphs! Rewards and punishments!  The occasional funishment!  

This led me to thinking...can I actually turn it upside down, and achieve my goals by asking, “What would a domme do?”  I mean, she’d probably lift the occasional weight so she can more effectively administer spankings, right?  Or get more sleep so she has more energy to plan devious scenes for her sub?  

Look forward to (hypothetical) future posts like, “Today I took control of this kitchen and made a delicious meal!”,  “Flogging for health and well-being”, and “Improving your memory while making others forget”.  

Welcome to my experiment!

Kink Advent Grand Finally

And that's a wrap? About a month ago I was surprised by @dommestic with a Tumblr post that resulted in a series of gifts and kinky adventures, which is probably the most thoughtful set of experiences I've ever had thrust upon me. (Thrust.) I got some new toys - some we've tried, some we have not - along with a trip to the local dungeon, a lot of time in bed, and a lot of time out of bed. We've still got a lot of things left to explore or try, and we started the new year off with a bang.

One of the gifts she gave me was a magnetic white board for the fridge, which she is currently using to track orgasms in the house. Initially it was split down the middle with two marks on her side, and one on mine, because that's how the bang went. To anyone who sees it, it's just marks - so I said "We should call it an Org Chart" and she wrote that on the bottom. The three marks were the result of me finding a hood on my pillow when I came back to the bedroom after getting some water, and her talking me down and up and down and probably sideways. I have been instructed if I have fun alone, it has to be added to the chart and I have to make things up to her.

We had more communication. We don't touch base to talk about kinky or sexy things every day - we did in December, because either she had a plan to implement, or because one of us had to say "hey maybe tomorrow" a couple of times near the end. We've been together for a fair amount of time and so far we've been kept very busy by other aspects of life, sometimes to the detriment of this sphere. Kink engagement feels a lot better, although I assume the realities of not-the-holidays are about to take over one or both of our days most weeks.

More stuff is on the way. I was measured for at least one item that's yet to come. She's working on a recording to go with the sleep mask with speakers on it. Other things were alluded to and for all I know, are hidden away or en route or are on a wishlist somewhere. (Send her recommendations?)

Learning is good. We're skimming the local dungeon to see what else is coming up to see as a class... but we're not scheduled for any cons. We do have a book to finish discussing, though.

The hood is weirdly comforting. I was not someone who brought in a proclivity for hoods - she wanted to try it - and I have to say I wonder what it might be like to sleep in one. Maybe it'd drive me nuts. Have you tried it? We used it during various sessions/scenes/etc. a lot.

Unfinished Business. I believe she had a poll and I remember talk of a footstool thing earlier but I was very much focused on other things at the time. I think. I'm a little fuzzy on most of the details of Monday morning.

I am not exactly sure how the scoring system on that Org Chart is going to go. If I did, though, I would point to it as some sort of foreshadowing. Will the interwebs throw things at me I can't ignore? Will I just hold out and not need to do anything to make marks? Will the weather be nice today? Did Echo pack her leftovers for lunch? Stay tuned!

I hope your year is off to a great start and I need to keep in better touch with the very few people on here I keep in touch with.

1. “@” people you want to be friends with (or want to hang out with in real life in the future)

This is where I get unnecessarily sappy or cheesy here because I always worry that I am not friends with people unless it is said out loud or in writing, in the sense of “W-Well I don’t want to assume that relationship maybe they’re just making small talk and I don’t know if they consider me a friend” and all that nonsense.

That being said, I’d love to get to talk/hang out with @dommestic and @dommesticpet more, and talk/hangout more with @pollyannadom and @faycreature! It was nice meeting and getting to talk more with some of you but would always love to chat more. ❤️

Also the elusive @thrallflower. One day.

Also hello @lily-ackerman and @mr-ackerman kidnapping you to heck swamp to see you again

As always, among many, many others. There are so many people I want to talk with more.

Also this person named @unlockingwonderland she seems swell 😜

Champion Nine

I've got to be up for a flight in very little time, but I'm writing this anyway. On Sunday @dommestic and I got to try out the last arrival from Kink Advent - it came from overseas, and I think it's called a Head Harness Bit Gag. We may need to make a modification to it to fit better, but I can say it modifies one's headspace. I've never used one before, or thought about using one, or knew what it was called until I looked it up just now. There are other attachments on it that all seem optional: blinkers, to keep you looking forward, a bit on which to champ, and I think I heard mention of connection points for a leash or reins or something.

I definitely felt out of my head - I haven't experienced any sort of gag or bit before, and I admit the idea of having it in my teeth makes me worry I'm going to damage it. Maybe they include a spare. It did feel nice - it makes sense that a physical restraint specifically for the head could do a lot to make you feel wildly different without hypnosis or anything else, and it's fun to make discoveries about kinky things that can be new and exciting that I never happened to think about before. She seemed to enjoy me in it, and I certainly felt good as this sort of thing sets expectations. Even if I want to say something, it's not particularly easy to articulate it.

She made mention of using it to focus me specifically on her so I wouldn't be able to look away - which feels amazing to hear - and I hope we get to do more with it later. But sadly, it won't be for a while as I'm needing to go through security in fairly short order for what has gone from a fairly short trip to what is sounding like a damp trip across the country.

I already miss Echo. I'm not particularly looking forward to the main reason for the trip, but there should be some fun parts from the work part that I probably can't write about. I'll also probably be looking into some things from this world, which I don't know that I will write about, but one thing I can say is I have a ridiculously large list of podcasts to get through and I think I may be traveling so much on Monday that I'll get through them.

I hope you've all been well! Time for bed. Very little time for bed, but time for bed regardless.

Whip and Horse

Last December, @dommestic measured my skull for an unknown-to-me present. I assume it was a hood. I joked it was a muzzle. And the answer is... it's neither of those!

It came in the mail last week before we went out of town, and today she showed me what we got. I admit pony play things were not on my radar. It's got a bit (to champ at), blinders (so I can't see to the sides), some sort of reins. There's a lot going on here, but I haven't had a chance to put it on as of yet. I'm interested in seeing how those blinders work. Or... not seeing. (You know what I mean.)

She seems to have a lot of ideas for it, and I'm scratching my head a bit as to what this will become.

Also it is worth noting there is no tail. And I am OK with that. Have any hypno-inclined people used this kind of equipment and if so, how did you like it? And what did you do with it?

Kink Advent Day Ten: The Mother Ship

Today's Kink Advent clue from @dommestic was "Whip," which meant to me "something to do with Indiana Jones or Pie." It was pie the tag for today was on a container of Cool Whip with (I believe) "orientation" as the clue. We went to the not-so-local dungeon for a class for the first time in about seven years for a thing with floggers and whips. We almost did some hardcore cuddling Sunday, but FedEx decided to go from "doesn't bother to knock" to banging on the door so loud you would assume it was a home invasion, so that ended that.

We did indeed make it out to the place for the orientation, much of which has been amazing fodder for conversation and consideration in the Dommestic House. (Dommecile?) I'm very rarely around groups of kinky people and kinky spaces, especially since the Beforetimes, outside of online conversation and one delightful person I visited while on business a couple of months back.

It's always fascinating to see how people present material to others, and how people teach. I saw and heard a lot I didn't expect, which resulted in some unwanted ringing in the ears. We saw some basic stuff, and advanced stuff that I would say is perhaps not to my tastes. But it's always fascinating to see what people learn and develop, be it refining something you saw in a Devo video once or coming up with a way to more or less instantly encase somebody in a block of styrofoam. It's vague, but such is required by the terms of service.

Lunch was good. Dinner was good. We have a lot to chew on now.

Kink Advent Day Twenty-Fi've had enough of distractions

Short version: X-mas kink does not go well.

I woke up this morning to the hint "Entrepreneur," which took me to a toy with a little slip of paper with a 25 and a drawing of Godzilla from the "Merry Crismas" version of that meme. @dommestic very rarely draws things with faces that I get to see, and she did an exceptionally nice job there. I'll probably tape it to my computer if she doesn't claim it as part of the sketch set.

Today's secret words: "Mirror Mirror or Muzzle." The goal was to try the Infinity Mirror again, assuming the neighbor didn't force their dog outside again as the poor little fellow sounded like they were barking to get back in.

Since there were several hours of visits for Christmas and that can take a lot out of anybody, things did not work out for the 25th. Hopefully people are good on the 26th so we can catch up. Even when it doesn't work, it's a great exercise to try this Kink Advent thing because we're both actually putting in a lot of time talking about things, and at least we're trying to make it work. It's really easy to take someone for granted when you live together and generally prioritize work over fun and are generally pretty spent by the end of the day, but I think we're making a lot of good progress that might pay off in the new year.

The important thing is, we're trying.

Kink Advent Day Twenty-Sevonnnnnnn

Today's clue: "D/s (or DS)?" took me to an area where some electronics charge to find a slip of paper with the clue "dressed in black." I didn't assume this meant @dommestic got a new outfit - it meant I spent most of the day working (and, uh, everything but showering and going out) in my collar. Which I have not done before.

The weird thing about it is that it's a larger one, and it feels a lot like when I have my work computer headset around my neck. Every now and again it feels like "oh I need to hang this up" before I realize no, that's not what that is. It was also new actually seeing myself in the collar when I was in the bathroom to brush my teeth, particularly given how I am dressed, which is not remotely sexy. (I blame the cold weather.) It was a fun exercise, although sometimes you forget it's there, which is a mix of good and bad. Maybe it requires more interactivity to maximize its purpose and power? Or maybe this is the lesson unto itself - these objects have no real power other than that which is imbued unto them? Nah, that can't be it. Regardless, I recommend giving it a try if you are the kind of person who has another person that makes you wear a collar. It's more fun when someone is reminding you it's there, by commenting on it or pulling on it.

A mystery box came in the mail with A Gift in it, and I have no idea what it is! Also, a copy of Kate "The Dildorks" Sloan's 101 Kinky Things Even You Can Do book arrived, which I only briefly flipped through before it was reclaimed and taken upstairs. The design is good, with a simple cover that's unlikely to draw too much attention if it was accidentally left out. I'm really glad there are more books like this, and I hope there are more so people can see things and go "Oh, so that's what that's called." I guess that made today a two-for-one! (I'm spoiled.)

Kink Advent Day Five Is Alive

I don't have a lot of specific recall for this one, really. Sorry, my bad.

After work, @dommestic called me up for Day Five, which the little paper five listed as "Reenforcement." That leaves the door open given what we've done - collar and leash, hypnosis, kneeling, other sexy fun times. She has been trying new settings on the Nova Pro 100, which I seem to be enjoying.

But let me tell you, it's intense some days. For those of us who probably got nudged toward hypnosis as a kink from TV or movies with snapping fingers or swinging watches, the low-grade assault of a light-and-sound machine at anything higher than the lowest possible light setting is a trip. If you're in a room with your eyes closed, you have some sense of light placement. The glasses beam red and green lights over your closed eyes, and sometimes are rather dainty and other times make it so you're probably not going to be sure if you're in a room with the lights off, or on, or on some other planet. We've had it for a few years and usually it was on a very, very low light setting. This certainly got the job done, but on tonight's setting I was aware of Echo telling me I can think about whatever distraction I wanted to and I couldn't hold on to much of anything for more than a few seconds. I think I nodded or something a few times, and it takes a minute (or 20) to ramp back up to normal.

One thing I've noticed is that it's basically "now or never" when waking up when the sessions end. Either I get up right away and start moving, or I'm going to need a lot of time to want to bounce up and get dinner or do whatever needs to be done.