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#cant take a joke
ithappensoffstage · 1 month
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I am genuinely so worried for all the young horny dykes going into adulthood thinking there's something "problematic" / "wrong" with them for being horny because fucking tiktok lesbians think any horny dyke content is "male gaze fetishitic"
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wazzi2ya · 2 months
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Alastor: *Gets down on one knee*
Lucifer: Oh my god, it's finally happening!
Alastor: *Falls over*
Lucifer: The poison is kicking in
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copingchaos · 5 months
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The IDF is counting on people to not have any critical thinking skills at this point
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More random Nimona headcanons
Bal is one of those people who isn’t allergic to anything except one random medication that no one uses 
Ambrosius calls him a lucky bastard every time it’s brought up because he’s allergic to everything 
His allergy list is at least three pages long and he doesn’t remember a single thing on that list 
Whenever they go out to eat Bal has to remind him “No you can’t eat that it has olives” “Not that either love it’s got lemon” and so on 
Most of his allergic reactions are pretty tame so he’ll eat it anyway
And it gives Bal and Nimona so much fucking anxiety 
One time Bal walked in on Nimona chasing Ambrosius around the kitchen yelling “Spit out the carrots Nemesis you don’t even like them that much!!” 
Whenever he eats alone he refers to it as a game of Russian roulette 
Bal refers to it as the reason he has high blood pressure
Because Bal and Ambrosius grew up in the limelight (for very different reasons) there are a million pictures of them through the years 
And they use those videos to bully the hell out of each other 
Bal can quote the video from the beginning of the movie not because it was an important moment in his childhood 
But because Ambrosius will quote it at the most random times throughout the day
Bal will do something small like kill a bug or chase out an animal that Nimona brought in
And he’ll hear Ambrosius mumble “I’m here to slay monsters and protect our kingdom”
He was a little worried Nimona would react badly to this habit but he started joining in 
One time he killed a spider and Ambrosius asks “Are you slaying monsters moonbeam?” Nimona yells from the other room “I’m so proud of him he’s truly protecting our kingdom” 
There are a million photos of baby Ambrosius on the internet 
And Bal made a PowerPoint presentation ranking their cuteness factor out of 10 (100 was the lowest score he got and it was a picture of him with the ugliest bowl cut you’ve ever seen)
And made Ambrosius sit through it 
That was the most loved and mortified he had felt in a long time
Nimona uses low-quality pictures of them as reaction photos 
There have been times when Nimona asks “Can we eat out tonight” and Bal tells her no and she sends him this 
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He’ll text back “Is that my fucking wanted poster?!” 
She asked Ambrosius if there was any ice cream left and he said no he expected her to call him and complain he didn’t expect this 
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He calls her yelling “When the fuck did that happen?!” 
And she hangs up immediately to let Bal deal with it
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ninjasmudge · 1 year
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req for shadehalo! mei, hit em wit da sticky hand
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spookysindy · 2 years
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Friend. What Friend?
When someone you wasted twenty years of your life on takes to twitter to moan to a stranger about you, rather than speaking to you about it, and then proceeds to call YOU immature?🤷🏻‍♀️
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For the record. I do not have a low mental capacity, a negative attitude or behavioural issues. I am neither immature or petty and I certainly do not need to be pitied (To make references about a person’s mental capacity is both shallow and shameful).
I am however, able to take banter and have a sense of humour (despite debilitating illness) something that this person is sadly lacking. This person does however have the ability to be so far up their own backside they must be finding it hard to breathe all while maintaining the talent of wrapping themself up in their own self importance.
Their support bandwagon swapping was the source of the supposed jokey banter from me that they rather dramatically refer to as failure to ‘agree to disagree’.
It may be a good idea for said person to delete all the comments they wrote instead of just a few. It kind of lets the cat out of the bag! I firmly believe I was never meant to see the tweets in question (I had been blocked) and will be forever thankful to the person who brought them to my attention.
To the author of the said tweets I say this….Your tweets do not say much for your so called good catholic values!
Nevermind I can take it, say a few ‘Hail Mary’s’ on Sunday and it is all forgotten.🙄✝️
I ditched that religious nonsense years ago.
I do firmly believe though that what goes around comes around and that Karma in time is a bitch. I hope it slaps this person in the face when the time comes……
Enough about this weary tale, far more interesting things to blog about. Will be back soon….Please stand by….
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shortscircuits · 1 month
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look at this pic my friend just sent me
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amoebeau · 1 year
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im woobifying the priest game in ways you cant even imagine
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nyaskitten · 6 days
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Geo and Cole would see the #savemyboycole shit and Geo would get upset, so Cole would kiss him on the cheek and tell him that people are just being stupid, and Cole only has eyes for Geo and Geo would wipe back the tears slowly forming and Cole would hug him and they'd. Like. Watch The Princess Diaries or whatever two gay men do when they're alone togather and in complete and total privacy and have a bunch of free time Idk.
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witchspeka · 9 months
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I love my girl Miwa but as soon as I read that this image immediately popped up in my head:
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cipheramnesia · 4 months
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While I'm not one for generational conflict cuz there's no war but the class war so to speak, I can't help but think that a "perfect millennial comedy routine" probably oughta consist of a little bit more substance than repackaged "kids use weird slang these days," along with askin to be given some common decency in accounta introducing Facebook and Instagram, plus also bein the boss.
Now folks I may just be a simple country baked salted ham, but it seems ta me that listin off four o the worst things in the world today ain't exactly any generation's idea of empathetic. Ain't a doubt in my mind we're more like than not cross put near three or four decades, jest sayin don't trust too well someone askin you to smile along while they insult ya and tell ya how ta act and they think ya oughta be quiet n grateful for a handful o garbage cuz they invented takin a shit.
But I don't know, don't listen to an old coot like me.
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ffc1cb · 1 year
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pathologic fanart
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