btw if y'all think gif makers who sell packs on payhip or kofi for $1 each are making bank, here are the 43 cents I made today lmao

don't get me wrong, I do charge more for bigger packs (or packs that were harder to color) but I can guarantee you that the people who sell most of their packs for $1 are not out here getting rich

it's time to go / social media au

max verstappen x singer!reader

summary: in which rumors spread about max cheating on you but thankfully, there's a knight in a shining red armor waiting for you

faceclaim: sabrina carpenter

author's note: this is my first time doing a social media au, so please go easy on me 😭 nevertheless, i hope you guys enjoy! also, i'm going to doing more parts to this :)

part 1 · part 2

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f1updates: Max Verstappen and singer-songwriter Y/N Y/L/N have called it quits after almost 2 years of dating. Sources close to the couple have commented the breakup saying, 'apparently there was some sort of infidelity involved.' The couple have yet to confirm these rumours, but what do you guys think? Check the link in our bio for more information regarding the situation.

liked by user12, user13, user14 and 586 others

user1: noooo mom and dad 😭

user2: i'm denial, ain't no way one of them cheated wtf

user3: say sike right now ☺️

user4: it's okay guys mom and dad are just being silly 🥰🥰🥰 it's fine 🥰🥰

user5: i mean if the cheating thing is true, i'm sure we all know who cheated on who

—load more comments—

y/n.insta: how long will it be cute, all this crying in my room 🎼

liked by charles_leclerc, user6, user7 and 321 278 others

user1: mother noooo 😭

user2: it's okay max ☺️ i just wanna talk ☺️🔪

user3: i didn't wanna believe it but looks like the streets were right this time 😪

user4: i'm so lost, what happened??

user3: apparently m*x cheated on y/n

user4: wtf nooo they were my endgame 😭

user5: charles what are you doing here

user3: lmaoo chill they're friends

user6: it's okay bby i can go vroom vroom in circles too and i promise i won't cheat

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y/n.insta: they say write about what you know so i wrote about heartbreak. it's time to go out now on all streaming platforms!

btw, had a BLAST in LA this last weekend. thank you so much for all the support, i love you guys 💖 next stop ➡️ miami

liked by charles_leclerc, user16, user17 and 987 532 others

user1: can't wait to see you in miami!! ♥️

user3: 15 years 😭 15 million tears 😭 begging till my knees bled 😭 i gave it my all 😭 he gave me nothing 😭 at 😭 all 😭 tHEN WONDERED WHY I LEFT 😭

user2: @/maxverstappen1 been awfully quiet since the queen dropped it's time to go 🤔

user1: not the tag lmaoooo 🤣

user6: okay can we pls talk about the fact that cHARLES is back in y/n's likes???

user5: i admire to be this delulu

user8: still feels so weird not the see max in the likes and comments

user11: i know right?? we get it, it was a good joke hahaha i'm laughing now pls can we stop this

user9: i think you dropped this 👑

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maxverstappen1: Simply... Lovely. What a great weekend again 🏆 Miami, thank you!

liked by redbullracing, user18 and 886 379 others

user19: it's time to go to apologize to y/n now ☺️🔪

user5: so proud of you, great job again!!

user17: imagine being in miami at the same time as the girl you CHEATED ON

user2: facts, i feel so bad for y/n cause i remember seeing a video of her saying she scheduled a show in miami at the same as the gp so her and max could spend some time together

user3: lmao at least Charles had a fun night at y/n's concert last night

user17: what?? how do you know that???

user3: he posted on instagram last night that he was there!!

— load more comments —

charles_leclerc: Good day yesterday, on and off track. Thank you, Miami! And special thank you to @/yn.insta for having me at the show ♥️ It was phenomenal and can't wait to see you again soon.

liked by @/yn.insta, carlossainz55, user13 and 687 931 others

yn.insta: Thank you so much for coming! I'm glad you had a good time ♥️ Can't wait to see you soon!

user6: the red hearts!!! and y'all called me delulu

user8: okay but the hearts don't necessarily mean anything?? i mean y/n just got out of a relationship

— load more comments —

Ya girl is growing like a beanstalk!

This past week made 6 years since I started my career in arts education at [insert nonprofit org]. I didn't know it was arts education then. Hell, I ain't know a lot of shit then. When I walked in as Program Coordinator, I really just NEEDED a full time job with benefits; today, I’m a confident arts educator and the Director of Education and Youth Development at the same nonprofit. Here are some things I've learned since March 2018:

You don't know shit until you learn some shit! I walked in knowing it all!! Until I had to learn it all. A lot of us walk into jobs, projects, opportunities thinking we will immediately start implementing new, bubbling ideas. I found my season of learning the organization to be gruesome, humbling, and ultimately growing.

Lean into what you do know! Truth is, I created my current role. I saw a need inside our program and filled it with what I knew. Theatre games, team building, life skills! Turns out what I did naturally was actually knocking on the door of SEL development i.e. collaboration, conflict resolution, self management, emotional regulation, etc. That’s when we [the org & myself] found out funders and donors LOVE programs that center social, emotional skill development for youth and communities!!! Lmao.

Take control of your own professional development! Yes, my instincts were natural but that doesn't mean I didn't need developing. I definitely needed to walk it like I talked it. How could I teach emotional regulation to children without working to regulate my own. So, I found PDs, conferences, programs, a mentor [haha another story for another day], a therapist [AMEN!!!], and challenging opportunities that would grow me personally as well as stretch my understanding of youth development and shape my ideology around SEL curriculum building. Whew! It’s been a ride! And lastly,

Stick with some shit! Y'all! I aint gon lie like I've not tried to quit, and a few times lmao, cause what millennial you know have stayed at ONE job for 6 years? Exactly. However [insert non profit org] really invested in my growth and understanding of arts education. They granted and funded professional opportunities that would lay the groundwork for the organization’s Education DEPARTMENT! A first for [insert nonprofit]!! I’m over a department y’all. That’s nuts!! I never could have guessed this 6 years ago.

Since 2018, so much has changed. And I thank God for nothing being the same. I made no resolutions in 2024. I want to rest in this season I’ve worked so hard to get to. Let come what may. I’ll be ready! ✨

The Maze Runner (2014) notes

It was no contest which trilogy I was gonna plow through next. I mean, it was a bit of a contest (originally thought I was gonna jump into Hunger Games) but I prioritized the series of which I'd seen less of.

Now I HAVE seen this one before, actually. Saw it in theaters with a whole group of friends, most of which I didn't know, I've forgotten most of the fine details, should be a good chaser for Divergent.

>real quick, "get ready to run" is a great tagline. "Get ready to be hungry." "Get ready to abra kadabra."

>opening shot fucks. Just the screech of the elevator, our eyes adjust same time as the dude's. Gold star

>if you let yourself get manhandled by Will Poulter that's on you

>idk the main dude's name yet but I'll guess. He looks like a Danny. My guess is his name's Danny

>oh that kid looks exactly like a Newt. Growing confidence in main boy's name being Danny

>i do remember this kid who dies at the end. Sorry, sport, you don't look movie star enough. Work on that jawline, maybe get yourself a taper

>"welcome to the Glade (bitch)"

>trying to vaporize Newt with my mind

>ain't no way these kids are keeping track of the years. Honey idk what day of the week it is and I got a widget at the bottom of my monitor (not checking it on principle)

>"no one's survived a night in the maze" okay okay i know how these things work. Danny's gonna make history

>stop calling him Greenie; his name is Danny

>"does he look like a Shank?" DANNY

>his name's not Danny. It's Thomas. No one talk to me rn, got a lot to work out

>sad to say I don't think I'd be a Runner. Probably be one of the guys that makes the food. Bet there's a quiz on one of the YA sites.

>who among us hasn't been mounted, strangled, unable to gain advantage, and reached to our sides to find a hand-sized, head-cracking apparatus? This movie tells my experience

>ik it's dumb of me to once again be asking who cuts all the hair, but seriously

>nvm, I believe that's a job around the Glade (we call them Shearers)

>death by maze, death by maze, death by maze

>"no one's ever survived a night in the maze" is the most telegraphed thing so far but I appreciate the setup. Movie's running at a solid clip

>lmao @ the maze monster quieting down to give Thomas a spook

>real sweet of the Gladers to hang around the maze entrance all night. Apparently just to entertain Chuck. Those are homies

>Danny Thomas setting Glade records on his third day. Man's looking for a promotion

>Really giving him the cold Poulter, ain't he (you don't have to laugh)

>exactly one girl showing up, nightmare nightmare nightmare

>didn't catch the part about Newt being the new leader. He looks quite overthrowable

>idk shit about mysteries but I like the speed this movie runs at. What's in the cannister, Danny Thomas?

>these boys are positively cracked at building shelters. I don't think I could built a hut in three years

>and scale models????

>girl's having a very reasonable response to this, gotta say

>Danny Thomas has still only been here three days?

>still appreciate the speed this is moving, but scenes have developed a sort of pattern: "I think we should do this" "no fuck you we should do this" "guys!" "what?!" "element from two scenes ago has developed"

>boy who just got grabbed by a Griever is named Zort

>so Danny Thomas, with like six essential Galders a foot behind him, goads one of the Grievers with a "come on!" as if it's not twelve feet long and immediately dangerous to everyone in a twenty foot vicinity. See this is why you're not the leader, Danny Thomas

>Will Poulter delivers THE most telegraphed punch of all time and Danny Thomas still gets caught with one. Bro wound up like Popeye, dude, that's your fault

>speaking of his fault, and ik we're not supposed to side with him and I'm not saying I do, I'm just saying Poulter's processing of these past few minutes is not unreasonable. This did indeed happen due to choices made by the Runners, intended by maze design or not. If anything, I think the Runners are being too gung-ho about this, considering the immediate consequences of every advancement they make

>bravo to Maze Runner for its introductions and executions. Coming into this from a trilogy of movies in love with introducing a concept then just kinda letting it fester in the frame, it feels like every element presented here has a later relevance. Danny Thomas noticing the Griever stings make the other Gladers seemingly remember something from their past, thus stinging himself to intentionally conjure his own? Well done, Whoever Wrote This Book I'm Not Looking It Up Right Now

>dude, and Poulter distrusting Danny Thomas because he, on a subconscious level, remembers seeing him when he got locked in the amnesia tank? Whoever Wrote This Book I'm Not Looking It Up Right Now really thought of everything

>literally just typing "oh cool of him to not implicate Teresa in the 'I did experiments on you guys' thing" but then he immediately does, lol. Why did the other guys have to know that about her right now, couldn't you tell her that in private

>screenwriters make british actors say Ass on purpose bc they know they'll say it funny

>ooh we got Return of the Jedi nods, somethin most silly's about to happen

>reasonable estimate on Poulter's part: if the protagonists go back in the maze they'll instigate some more Griever shit, probably. Unless the maze doors are just open permanently, now, in which case it makes no difference, Poulter

>Mutinyyyyyyyyy

>was just thinking "don't these kids wanna pack before they leave the Glade forever" but like pack what lol

>I wanna know the life story of the extra who elected to stand like this:

>Danny Thomas is just full of Trailer Lines, isn't he

>score's very generic in this, unfortunately. Could've done cool motifs, divide the Glade and the Maze orchestrally but just about all of it's unremarkable

>half these Grievers die like Land Before Time villains

>then again I also like the lack of music, a lot of the time. Makes things tense

>feeling like there's not enough of a visual difference between the Science Facility and the Glade/Maze. Sure there's video screens but the color scheme's identical. Should've been like the difference between the Commonwealth and the Institute in Fallout 4, like that sucker punch of a juxtaposition

>calculated that 24% of all lines in this movie are "we call it the (noun)"

>so these kids represent the new generation of humans immune to The Flare, so they were trapped in The Maze to study what makes them immune, and it's not just that these kids have antibodies. Like it's not just that. Not saying I follow but I won't get hung up on it rn

>"is it over?" "I don't know, chuck; think maybe we're in the figurative book one of the proverbial multi-book series that is our lives. Three books, at least."

>hahahahahaaaaaa, okay, lining up the cast in frame, "this is just the beginning," music swells, only for Poulter to run in for the antagonistic walk-off homer is good stuff

>weirdly articulate and conversational for someone who's been stung, gotta say

>one thing I remember from my first viewing was my theater cracking up when it's revealed Chuck's been shot

>what do actors think about when they pretend to be dead and their costar is crying over them

>"we call them whirly-twirlies (helicopters)"

>nice of the move go give us/the character's a bird's eye view of the maze, smart of them to wait until the very end

>"Time to begin Operation Sequel"

>author's name is James Dashner. Aight. Good work, G, got a few notes for you: --Thomas' name should've been Danny --that's it

So all in all I like the movie. Note that me liking something and being a fan are different concepts. Movie's exactly where it needs to be and there's obvious care and respect being taken, which I'm sure the fans can appreciate even if maybe Character A isn't rude enough or they cut out Character H. As for what the next movies'll be like, idk, but I'm excited to see.

Hey guys!! 

Here’s the new thing I’ve been writing! I hope y’all enjoy lmao this started as a dumb idea but now I’ve been really emotionally invested in it. I’m gonna try to post about twice a week. Let me know what you think, please!!! Tags: @abunchofbadchoices, @mrsbhandari, @lilmissperfectlyimperfect 

The first time he’d ever told anyone, it was his first boyfriend, and he was met with a sarcastic snort.

“Come on, ‘Jay. That’s just what gay guys say when they’re scared to come out all the way. You can’t be both gay and straight, you have to choose.”

He was fourteen, and had no idea what to make of any of his feelings, much less the weird ones that made his heart beat faster and made butterflies storm his stomach. So he accepted that, and listened to Jake, who was older and wiser than him.

“Are you sure?” he’d asked.

“Yeah. Wait, ‘Jay, do you not like me anymore?”

“What? Of course I do.”

“Oh, good. I was scared you were trying to break up. But I don’t know why you’d say something as crazy as that. You know you can always talk to me, okay?”

Ajay nodded, but deep inside he sincerely doubted that. In retrospect, it was the first of several red flags that had led to a less-than-happy ending for him and Jake.

The next people he told were his parents. As far as Indian parents went, they were pretty open-minded, and hadn’t really cared about him liking guys. He’d even been able to bring home boyfriends or school dance dates without making too many waves with his parents. They didn’t really understand why he couldn’t just date a nice girl, but they loved him anyways, and he knew he was lucky.

But when he’d said he liked both guys and girls, he was met with polite parental confusion.

“What? But you only go out with boys, putra,” his mom had said. “You’ve never brought a girl home. How do you know you like both, hm?”

It was an excellent point. Ajay couldn’t explain how he knew he liked girls, just like he couldn’t explain why he liked guys. But he just did.

His father shook his head. “No, no, no. You’ll have to choose someday. You don’t have to hide yourself and pretend you like girls just to make us happy. You know we love you.”

Ajay hadn’t even known how to respond to that one, so he’d just nodded and excused himself from dinner. He’d never brought it up again.

He’d posted anonymously on a forum for gay youth that he’d found, but hadn’t recieved much other than “that’s not real”, “you can’t like both”, “you have to choose”, “so you’re a cheater?” and “you’re just saying that because you’re scared of committing to life as a gay guy”.

It wasn’t long before he’d just logged out completely, questioning himself. Did he just think he was attracted to girls because he felt like he had to be? Because society said guys were supposed to like girls? Was it true that he was scared of being gay, because of all the homophobia he’d have to face? Especially as a second-generation Indian, he was expected to life the perfect heterosexual American lifestyle, getting a good job and having two or three kids and making his family back in India proud of their success story. Even though his parents knew he was gay and didn’t care, nobody else in his family knew. He hated to think what they’d say about him if they did. They already talked smack about Ajay’s only openly gay cousin, Aditya, and Ajay knew he was basically dead to the family.

So was he just pretending he liked girls to escape the full ramifications of being gay? It was possible, he thought, but probably not. He’d never had a girlfriend or even been on a date with a girl, but that was due to an unfortunate outing incident orchestrated by his ex (another of those red flags he’d ignored).

Despite the fact that he was outed, though, he’d found a group of friends who had thoroughly supported him. Rory, in all of their genderfluid nonbinary aro/ace glory, Clint and Natalie whose sexualities seemed to be oriented towards whichever gender Rory presented as on a given day, Skye who was a goth sapphic icon, James who was the token straight ally, Trevor who was so deep in the closet that Ajay doubted he’d come out this century, then two mysteries.

One was Erin, Ajay’s longtime best friend. He knew she liked guys, but he didn’t know if she only liked guys or if she liked other genders too. He wasn’t about to ask, though, because asking her would lead to her asking him, and he wasn’t quite prepared for that.

The other was Grace, James’ twin sister. As far as James was known as a heartbreaker, Grace didn’t appear to have dated anybody. Or at least, she didn’t talk about it and neither James nor Rory, who’d known her since childhood, said anything about it either. And again, he wasn’t about to ask because of the possibility of the awkward return question.

All his friends would pick on him, good-naturedly, about just how gay he was– how he always dressed sharp, his hair was always neatly combed and occasionally slicked back with gel, how he liked theatre way more than a straight guy could ever, the fact that he couldn’t do math, how his best friend was a girl, his taste for iced lattes, his distaste for anything athletic. Erin had even caught him doing a facemask one morning, and had teased the living hell out of him for it. Ajay didn’t see the big deal– he just wanted to keep his skin clear– but was willing to accept that basic hygiene and skincare were not something that straight men typically did.

It was all in good fun, and Ajay knew that, and he would even laugh along with his friends when they pointed that stuff out. It was funny, he could admit that. And he was gay— that was the only part of his sexuality that was easy for him to admit. He’d found comfort in that label, even though it wasn’t the full story.

In all honesty, he was scared to be openly bisexual. Coming out as gay to his parents after being forcibly outed at school was the hardest thing he’d ever had to do, and he couldn’t imagine doing it again. And how would he explain that he liked both guys and girls? He’d seen what they said on TV and in the movies, even in some books. Bisexuals are promiscuous, bisexuals are cheaters, all bisexuals choose to be either gay or straight eventually. It’s just a phase.

In previous years, in weaker moments, he’d wished he could just be gay. After a particularly disastrous encounter with a girl named Kelly and his very unfortunate crush on her, he’d cursed himself for liking girls when everyone knew he was gay. He tried to convince himself to be gay, to just only like guys, but it never took.

It never took, and it was one of the reasons he resented Rory, who was unapologetically themself. Rory didn’t care what people said, and either way they weren’t interested in dating. Rory had it good, anyways. They had parents who loved them, accepted them unconditionally, and had even thrown them a coming out party. They were just a far braver person than Ajay was, and Ajay wished he could have their accepting family and their confidence and just be who he was.

Ajay sat down heavily at the lunch table, having gotten there surprisingly early. Rory sat there, picking at their lunch absent-mindedly while scrolling through their phone. Grace sat beside them, twirling her hair around her finger and completely ignoring her lunch in favor of staring at something across the cafeteria. Ajay followed her line of sight but only saw the new poster advertising their spring musical, The Tempest.

Grace had snagged the lead role of Miranda after making her high school theatre debut as the lead in their fall play. It was her sophomore year, after she and her brother transferred from a school in Seattle when her parents decided to move back to their hometown and start their own business, a small diner called the Golden Griddle. Grace herself was an impressive actor, and even though Ajay didn’t want to admit it, she was an impressive person as well.

She turned her head as if snapping out of a trance, looking towards Ajay.

“Hey,” she greeted him. “Just checking out the new posters. I didn’t see them before.”

That’s right, Ajay reminded himself. Of course she might not have seen them until now. She had been noticeably absent from rehearsal yesterday, where Skye and Mr. Olsen had presented the new posters and the entire group had spent the last half-hour putting them up all over the school. It hadn’t been a huge deal- there were plenty of scenes that needed blocking, and Ajay had just had Skye stand in for Grace where it was needed. But he couldn’t pretend he wasn’t concerned, especially since he’d seen her twin heading home from soccer practice.

“Yeah, we put them up during rehearsal yesterday.”

“About that,” she started, looking uneasy. “I’m sorry I didn’t come to rehearsal yesterday. I… wasn’t feeling well, and I had to go home early.”

Ajay furrowed his brows. Grace looked so uncomfortable while she was saying that that it was obvious it was a lie, or at least not the entire truth. He wanted to ask her about it, but then James loudly sat down beside her, chatting with Erin, and he dropped it. Grace looked relieved at her brother’s interruption. Ajay shook it off– it didn’t really matter anyways. But he was worried all the same.

“Stop pouting,” Erin interjected,shooting him a ferocious glare. He was so surprised that the frown slipped off his face, causing the whole table to break out into giggles. Even Grace, which eased the worry a little. He shot a fake glare Erin’s way, then had to dodge another glare.

Skye, Natalie, Clint and Trevor showed up not long after, and Rory finally looked up from their phone.

“Hey,” they said. “How was everyone’s morning?”

Skye groaned. “Math test. Kill me now, before my parents see my grades.”

Grace rolled her eyes. “You know you got this, Skye. You knew everything on that test when we were studying last night.”

“Test anxiety is a bitch, though,” Trevor added. He prodded Skye’s shoulder. “I get it. We can’t all be the modern-day Einstein.”

“I resent that,” Grace mumbled, though a small smile remained on her face.

“I signed up to take the SAT at the end of the year,” Erin interjected. “I’m starting SAT prep tutoring this weekend. Three hours on both days.

The entire table except Ajay cringed. “Me too,” he admitted. “I’m gonna need a lot of help if I want a good score on the math section. I can’t make heads or tails of some of this trig stuff.”

Privately, he’d been thinking of asking Grace to help him out after rehearsal. She was already helping Skye on weekends, and though he couldn’t pay her like Skye’s parents could, he thought he’d offer to buy her dinner if she agreed. But that thought remained stuck inside his head, some part of him inexplicably nervous about being alone with her.

While he was caught up in his thoughts, wondering why the girl made him nervous and furiously trying to ignore that part of him, the conversation at the table had continued on without him. James jabbed Grace with his elbow and she jabbed him back. Erin and Rory talked about the college application process, Erin admitting that she wouldn’t be trying for any BFA Drama programs. Clint and Natalie hung on to Rory’s every word, echoing their indignation that Erin wouldn’t pursue drama in higher education. Skye and Trevor talked about set design, Skye even whipping out her sketchbook to add in some details.

By the time Ajay regained attention of the conversation around him, triggered by Erin asking him about that week’s rehearsal schedule, Grace had already zoned back out of the conversation, staring at the poster again. Ajay frowned again. What was up with her?

“Earth to Ajay”, Erin said. “We were arguing over which team was better, softball or soccer. What do you think?”

Ajay quirked an eyebrow. “Erin, I don’t do sports.”

“I don’t know why not. They’re fun! Even just to watch.”

“You know full well I have a complete aversion to any physical activity. But I guess if I had to choose, I’d say soccer.”

Erin nodded knowingly, a smirk playing on her lips. “I can see that. Scoping out the hot guys, are we?”

Ajay sighed “Sure,” he said, trying to sound as defeated as possible. Erin knew how he’d dated Jake a while ago, and he was now the team captain in his senior year at Berry. Erin had a theory that he still held a torch for the guy, though, which couldn’t be further from the truth. The only games he went to anymore were the ones that the whole theatre group went to with Grace to support James. Even though James wasn’t cast in the musical, he was an honorary part of the crew, having stepped in with his calm demeanor during various theatre emergencies. Everyone liked the guy– it was impossible not to– and they made up the loudest group on the bleachers cheering for him.

The only reason Ajay still liked soccer was because it was the only sport he understood. Jake had made sure he’d known everything about soccer, talking about it constantly. Ajay knew his ex planned to play pro soccer in Europe after graduation. Ajay had grown into a soft spot for the game that didn’t end when his relationship with Jake had.

The bell rang to signal that lunch was over, and everyone got up except Ajay and Grace. Ajay, because he was still reeling over the exchange, and Grace, because she was still lost in space, staring at that poster.

“Hey,” he said to her, barely able to make himself heard over the chatter in the cafeteria. “You okay?”

Grace’s eyes snapped to Ajay’s, looking startled for a half-second. “Oh, yeah, just distracted,” she said unconvincingly. She started to gather her stuff, and Ajay echoed her.

He fell into the crowd beside her, trying to make their way through into the hallway. Ajay screwed up all his courage to ask her about tutoring, because he really did need that extra math help.

“Hey, so, I was wondering if you’d be able to help me with my math stuff? I’ll be working on the SAT problems on the weekends but I’m falling dangerously behind in class again. I can’t really pay you but I can buy you dinner or something?”

Grace looked over, a little surprised. “Oh, yeah, sure. You don’t need to buy me dinner, though. I don’t charge my friends.”

“You don’t? But don’t Skye’s parents pay you?”

Grace looked a little embarrassed. “They insisted, and I tried to resist but Skye told me it was just a drop in the bucket for them. So really, I don’t need anything.”

“If you’re sure,” Ajay said. “But if there is anything I can do to repay you, I’ll do it.”

Grace paused for a moment. “Um… if you could help me with English it would be great. I don’t know what any of these old British writers are saying.”

“Sure, that stuff can be hard to digest. Sounds like a good deal for me.”

“Alright. Think we could hit up a coffee shop or a fast food place or something, say twice a week after rehearsal?”

Ajay nodded. “Thanks, Grace.”

“No, thank you,” she smiled. “See you at rehearsal.” Then she ducked her head and disappeared into the crowd.

Bea & Lola & Ronnie & Charlie

1st attempt at group chat style

Bea: Celebrations are in order! Who's in and where do we start? Lola: Hell yeah count me in! 🎉 pre-game at ours if we're stocked? 🍸💊 Ronnie: Finally ditched the freckled dead weight, yeah? I'll drink to that Charlie: Lmao Charlie: We were good last time I checked but if not sounds like princess is in the treating mood, yeah? 😉 Good news all 'round Bea: Since when do you need a reason? 🤔 but I got a first, if you must know Bea: I'll be round in a bit then, save me some, Lola talking specifically to you now, know a losing battle when I see one Ronnie: since we ain't all getting bankrolled by the student loan. fitzy that's where you're wrong bitch we out Lola: Yes girl! 🤗 I got you and will be keeping suitable 💊 from the mouths of these babes 😏 Congrats on being a brainbox confirmed too btw Lola: if someone ☝ stayed outta my stuff we're good 🤞 Ronnie: fuck you. sharing's caring Bea: says THE most selfish one in this chat ok Bea: and thanks Lo 😘 Ronnie: get off my tits princess Charlie: even the club drugs??? why you been doing them alone in the middle of the day you nutter 😂 ah well Lola: They were mine and I took them Thursday 👍 Bea: tits, where??? Charlie: children please! there's always a dealer with a dick to suck, we don't need to eat each other quite yet, chill out or you need some of that too Charlie: Christ Ronnie: on it, no complaints outside of this chat like Charlie: He'll be devvo its not me 😕 Ronnie: if I was scoring from big dom then yeah but like fuck am I going that far for you cunts Lola: he asked me if I wanted a free tat last time I went 😕 looking to branch out or just touch my body with needles? No way to know Bea: God, Lola, do not ⛔ its free hepatitis is what it is, Charlie already dicing with death there 😷 Grotty Ronnie: fuck it they're treatable 'cept for A Ronnie: shit at drawing though so forget that like Bea: 🙄 well then, go ahead and catch 'em all like pokemon, aim for those mid-grades though, over-achieving will get you 💀 Ronnie: reckon its too late for that. he's sound though 'cept this art on my arm looking like a dog's dick Ronnie: all I got from him Lola: have you even shown me that? 👀 viewing party tonight too please Charlie: Didn't think that was your thing Lolly? As long as it's attached to a dog you're into it? 😵 alright our kid 😬 Lola: Shut your gob Charlie! 🖕 Bea: you WANT to be insulted, masochist 💘 if it was decent it wouldn't match the rest, man knows your aesthetic if nothing else Charlie: 😂 soz babe Ronnie: fuck off and get a tramp stamp you sket Bea: good one 👍 bitter you won't get to see Ronnie: nah I'm bitter that he hasn't written that cunt's name on you yet. guarantees a break up like Bea: Whoever could you be talking about? You're so unclear about your feelings, so mysterious Lola: guys this is not a party atmosphere! I wanna wreck my head in a good way Lola: Calm the tits you both have please Charlie: Agreed, now everyone say thank you to Ronnie for going on the drugs run Charlie: THANK YOU RONNIE 💖 Ronnie: what happened to not eating me out fitz? you strike out last night or what? Lola: I'll say it when I get my share not before 😏 Charlie: I'm trying to create a party atmosphere, silly bitch Charlie: What says party better than oral? Ronnie: we haven't had an orgy for ages, miss me that much yeah? Bea: only domestics these days, init? Charlie: not in front of the children, please Lola: 🤒 Lola: thanks for the mental scars Ronnie: any time Bea: Well, you've really brought me down Bea: Get a better night out if I stayed here, saying something 🙄 Ronnie: knock you down if you want Bea: I was asking for a good time, not necessarily in pissing myself at you trying but if that's all you've got, babe Ronnie: this bitch Bea: Yeah, I am. Lola: 😂 you two kill me Charlie: so much unresolved sexual tension Charlie: its getting to us all Charlie: sort it out lads Lola: speak for yourself ✌ Ronnie: she couldn't turn me on if her boyfriend's life depended on it you filthy scrote Ronnie: porn hub's here for you lad, use it Bea: Oh, please. You're never off, out here panting like a dog. Bea: And you can dream on too, Charlie. NEVER going to happen. Ronnie: something to fucking agree on Ronnie: around you I'm dead below the waist cheers for that Ronnie: like im on ket Charlie: You both know it will 🌈😍🎆 and it will be magical Bea: Welcome. Perhaps you could use the moments of clarity to do something with your life. Ronnie: I'm scoring for you right now princess so go fuck yourself Bea: One for the CV, I'm sure. Bea: If you thought I was thanking you, or going down on you...I'd be quicker to get my own. 👑 remember? Get it flown in from Columbia before that Ronnie: get your fucking own then Ronnie: i asked for neither that's fitzys wet dream Bea: Always quick to martyr yourself Bea: No one asked you to go get the gear Bea: and you took it all in the first place so; what's your issue here? Ronnie: fuck you Ronnie: you're a cunt that's every day's issue Lola: 🤦 Bea: Are you TRYING to make Charlie cum in his pants? Bea: Take that shit private, I've told you both I'm not interested Bea: What, not room for two in this town? Ronnie: no need to try he's pulling himself off as we speak Bea: Well, always nice when they essentially do the job themselves when you're past your prime, I imagine Charlie: I'm ignoring you both, is what I'm doing Charlie: You're both clearly blobbing so we'll save the idea for another day Charlie: Damn 😏 Lola: 🙄 Lola: Charlie I raised you better than that! Charlie: What?! Did you see how cunty the lone rangers were being Charlie: and I say ONE thing Lola: period bants are so 20 years ago boy Lola: know better Lola: Just cos they don't have any idea how to play nice Lola: that's old too Charlie: Who said its bants? Speculation 'bout the state of their knickers if nothing else Charlie: also, I add, probs in a twist Charlie: ba-dum-tss Ronnie: get your head outta my crotch for 5 seconds lad christ Charlie: 🐶 Ronnie: get your red wings from that bitch, just be prepared to be disappointed like, princess talks a good game but that's it like Bea: Yet here you are, all mouth. Bea: Both of you stop projecting your creepy shit, thanks Lola: everyone stop this shit or I bounce, thanks 👌 Lola: I could have a better party on my own at this point Bea: Agreed Bea: I'm staying here, see you around Lo Charlie: Ughhhhhhhhh Charlie: Guys no Lola: Laters then B xx Charlie: I'll even miss the chance to be 'insensitive' and tell you to kiss and make up, alright? Charlie: We're all bored, obvs, we need a party Charlie: Everyone suck it up, we can split up after pre-drinks, so what does it matter Lola: Fine, one more chance 😌 don't fuck it up Lola: Bea you in? Charlie: Ronaldo? Bea: Yeah, whatever Ronnie: suck a dick charlie I was never out Charlie: Well...with that confusing display of enthusiasm, we're back on! Bea get your fine ass on that train, we'll sort the rest between us Charlie: Everyone happy? Lola: 😁 Ronnie: 🖕 Bea: Nothing and no one's bringing me down 💋

Saturday 22nd September

mood: feel like doing something new and exciting but don't have the energy to do so

I had started so many posts but haven't gone past mood in any so now I have a collection of my moods on different days.  A lot has happened since I last wrote, but just focusing on the recent, I went out for lunch with my homegirl last Friday. It was my last meat day so I made her come so that I could have some chicken. We also went to the park and laid there for a few hours listening to cringy songs that we listened to when we were 12y/o. I don't know what it was but I would easily say that day was one of my top 5 days this year. Even though we did nothing or may have not talked much, we just sang badly, laid and stared at the sky. It was peaceful, I felt like I could think about anything and everything without feeling overwhelmed or lonely. I need more days like this. My introverted ass was over the moon.

I don’t think she realizes how capable she is for a lot of things! I don't know anyone who studies as much as she does, she’s so fcking selfless and it frustrates me that I can’t get her to see that she is actually doing enough or in fact more than enough. But its just the systems and reality of it all where we’ve all adapted ourselves to this mindset where we need to do this and this for something and go above and beyond of it all, but what if we don’t want to do this anymore? What if we want that? I think that she should go for whatever she wants to do and not feel trapped in this bubble. She shouldn’t feel that she is disappointing others by changing or doing something different than what she originally planned to do. She’s in this for life, literally. If science gives you fanny flutters then go for it. You ain't disappointing me, I think I’ll be even happier for you cause I think that it’ll give you a fresh healthier mindset. 

I went on a dinner date with my man and had ice cream at a place that had board games which we could play! I totally beat his ass at checkers and tic tac toe. I also went over to his place yesterday. I got my period. I was a bit emotionally unstable. I say “ a bit” but really I had a sook after we did some things, then in less than a minute I was normal again and didn't know why I teared up so I had an ice cream bar. Boyfriend points for offering me some ice cream bars. I am actually quite shocked at how moody I was and how normal he was with me, I can’t believe that he likes my crazy ass lol. I really like you lmao you don't need to be better g, I like you for you, haha cringe gross, okay churr. 

There was a moment where he was laying on me, we were in silence, and my mind had drifted off a bit to naughty land. The creepiest thing happened. He asked me if I’m okay. I said, “yeah, why?” - “Nothing your heart just sped up all of a sudden.” I just laughed it off but really I was slightly mortified and amazed cause I didn’t expect my heart to do that, he then further said: “now it’s really going.” Like yes, yes it is going because I am shy and embarrassed and thought about doing things with you!!

I also found out something about myself; I really like taking naps. I was never the kid who took naps after school or during the day. What type of taboo is this? I really like naps, specifically naps with him. I would trade to have a day where we both could just nap together with a blanket. 

Something also happened yesterday, I got a call from a place I applied to and had a mini phone interview. I think it went well from my side tbh but idk. I’m going in for an interview on Tuesday. I’m not that nervous cause it hasn't hit me yet but I’m positive that I’ll be a mess on Monday. I just need to sell myself I guess, I think I got this. I really need and want this job. It will give me stability and some responsibility but I wouldn't be surprised if I didn’t get it. I’m not expecting much. But I do hope that I get it. 

Oh and on Thursday my lecture got canceled, my assignment got extended and my grades were incorrectly entered meaning that I actually got a higher grade so its safe to say that this week treated me super well and I got to spend some quality time with these people. 

I wanna get a massage with someone or get my nails done with someone, I wanna go to a park and chill and play board games or general games, I wanna go to an island, I wanna exchange handwritten letters with someone, I wanna do something. My life is so mundane that I try to seek any type of ‘adventure’ I can get. But then I also just wanna be home, in my room, and be on my laptop and watch random videos or read. Sometimes I get bored of doing that, so I try going out then get tired of being out or the idea of getting ready to go out sigh lol the struggles. 

Even if I don't see them often, I 100% enjoy the time I get to spend with everyone. I don’t care about how many times I can see them in a week, I get to spend quality time and I really really like that. It's not that I don't want to see my man or girl every day, its that I like that we both can have our own personal bubble so that when we do see each other it feels amazing for me to let them in. We don't have to be doing many different things but it’s rather the way we spend our time together and interact that’s important to me. It may seem like we go our own ways most times but we still like each other and want each others time and attention. So it’s nice to have my own space, to recharge, I think it's important to not be overbearing or suffocating. But I think that I do do this from time to time, or maybe I’m just overthinking. I just wanna know what's up, but don't want to be at your throat and want to know your actions and location for every minute. So here’s your happy post! *throws sparkles everywhere* I had a great week babe! xoxo, gossip girl