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earthstellar · 1 year

Text

if cyber-fleas exist, OH NO

so I’m having a “fun” day off where I have to look up and see if the active ingredients in my field camping bug spray will interact with any of my medications or set off my eczema and I also need to go get flea spray and wash everything I own because my dirt cat got fleas somehow despite getting regular flea medicine, poor little dude :( already called the vet and have to pick up slightly stronger flea meds but at least it’s not too expensive so ayyyy

BUT this gives me an idea!!!

concept: Ravage helps out on an away mission on a weird planet everyone wanted to check out for some reason but ends up getting cyber-fleas and is SO FUCKING MAD ABOUT IT and it’s embarrassing, god dammit

he goes to the med bay and Velocity promises to be 100% confidential about it, reassures Ravage that no she’s not gonna tell anyone, of course not, it happens sometimes, if you’re OK with it here’s what we can do about it, we have a couple options etc.

but it’s close to mid-day refuelling time, so Nautica stops by to see if Velocity wants a nice fresh energon cube

and ends up seeing Velocity in the middle of screwing the cap off of what is essentially a flea medicine dropper while Ravage is furiously chewing on his tail

and it’s just so fucking clear that Nautica is trying SO HARD to restrain herself as she just sets the cube down and backs right the hell out of the med bay

Velocity immediately starts texting her “YOU CAN’T TELL ANYONE, PATIENT CONFIDENTIALITY IS IMPORTANT!! OH MY GOD I CAN’T BELIEVE I FORGOT TO LOCK THE DOOR NAUTICA PLS I DON’T WANT TO GET YELLED AT FOR THIS”

and Ravage is now chewing on his paw like “the faster you give me the medication the faster I can be out of here please just do your job. also less chance of me spreading cyber-fleas the sooner this gets done”

and Velocity just goes oh shit because he’s right, cyber-fleas can potentially infest everything, FUCK

so she tries to figure out the correct protocols for dealing with external parasites but selects the wrong code (one digit off, it’s an easy mistake to make)

which then pings all the other medical staff that there is a “potential contagious pathogen” on board and the med bay goes on a mid-level auto-lockdown

and Velocity is like SHITTTTTT but trying to keep cool in front of Ravage who is immediately sick of this shit (and he also immediately realises that Velocity is not having a good day but isn’t roasting her for it because he promised Megatron he’d actively try to not be an asshole to anyone as part of building up more positive relations with the crew lmao)

so now Velocity is getting pinged with Nautica going “I’M SORRY I’M SORRY” and Ratchet and First Aid are sending urgent medical staff pings asking for details on the potential pathogen because they have no idea what’s going on as they were both assisting with other away team members when this started but now they’re effectively locked out of the med bay

and neither Ratchet nor First Aid want to use their overrides in case it might actually be something serious warranting a lockdown, lol

and Rodimus, Magnus, and Megatron are pinging her asking for a sit rep on the med bay in case they may need to divert other crew to support the medical staff or extend the precautions to certain sections of the ship

and it’s fucking chaos

but Velocity is like “uuhhhhh fuck it” and gives Ravage the flea medicine and starts frantically trying to figure out what she fucked up with the protocol code (because prioritising the patient is always good, right??? she may or may not be panicking a little lmao we’ve all been there tbh <3)

meanwhile Ravage is resisting the urge to roll around a little (because cyber-flea medicine stings for a second and he’s fucking itchy right now to begin with) and pings Megatron directly to explain what happened (and also request extreme sensitivity when disclosing any further information to others because I Do Not Want These People To Know I Have Fleas)

Nautica hears about the med bay lockdown from one of the away team members who overheard Ratchet and First Aid talking about it, and so she starts panicking a little too and decides to ping First Aid (because she doesn’t want to potentially antagonise Ratchet lmao) and let him know about what she saw in the med bay right before it locked down which makes her feel bad but also oh shit what if it’s serious?????

but this just results in Nautica actually physically going over to where everyone is sort of standing outside the med bay now trying to figure things out and everyone is bewildered at her very emotional (and very fast and maybe slightly too loud) explanation of things to First Aid

(and Ratchet who actually is standing right there also, but he’s just like “listen it’s good to let us know, you’re not in trouble, neither is Velocity or Ravage, we’ll figure it out” but he says it in a somewhat put-upon way so she doesn’t relax until First Aid gives her a thumbs up when Ratchet isn’t looking while he’s busy taking his turn trying to get the med bay door open, lol)

eventually it resolves after Megatron starts sorting things out on the command alert side of things to deescalate the automatic protocols that are activated when the med bay triggered auto-lockdown, so Ratchet and First Aid do eventually get the door open.

Ravage is pissed off that now there’s a crowd etc. but also the flea medicine seems to be working so hey he’s not that mad, at least not until Ratchet and First Aid both tell him that he has to self-quarantine in his hab suite until they can do a room visit and ensure that all the cyber-fleas are dead to prevent any spread to other crew members with mechanimal alt-modes etc.

(Ratchet pings Megatron with some details about the recommended self-isolation for Ravage just because he knows Ravage is more likely to listen to Megatron than anyone else; Megs just responds with an OK emoji because he’s still busy sorting shit out on the bridge lol)

Velocity does get a little bit of a talking-to from both First Aid and Ratchet, mostly First Aid (since Ratchet’s too old to be doing this shit and someone has to file the paperwork about it lol), but it’s nothing serious; it’s an easy mistake to make, and they spend the rest of the afternoon going over med bay protocol numbers and lockdown procedures for potential contaminants/various other hazards.

(and also many reminders to lock the door when a patient is being seen, but it’s pretty clear this is a lesson that has been Super Learned on this day, so they don’t roast her too bad lol)

Velocity and Nautica do get very drunk at Swerve’s that night but it’s fine, they’re just glad it didn’t spiral more out of control than it did lmao :’) <3

all’s well that ends well!!!

also once he’s out of self-isolation when all the cyber-fleas are confirmed dead, Ravage does send Nautica a text basically saying “thank you for not calling me a “little cute meow boy” or some other nonsense while I was in a state of acute medical distress” which he feels may be a slightly dramatic way of phrasing things but he really fucking hates cyber-fleas lmao

(Nautica replies with “no problem!!! :)” but also saves a screenshot of the text and puts it in her digital collage diary for posterity, because she is getting better at making friends!!!!)

#long post #does this count as some kind of fanfiction at this point #lmao I don't know #headcanon?#idw 1 #maccadam #maccadams #idw ravage #idw nautica #idw velocity #medbay posting #idw first aid #idw ratchet #idw megatron

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i-need-air · 3 years

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Hybrid!AU Wolf!Bakugou Katsuki HCs.

Summary: How would Hybrid!Bakugou would react to being adopted by the reader and their domestic life together. Headcanons and believe me, it's a long one... [2k WORDS OF HCS psjxksdj stop me pls] PLATONIC/ROOMMATES HCS, will do a part two later on with continuation and romance cuz 2kwordsbro...

Notes: I love Hybrid AU!s and I want to indulge myself with this. I barely see these in the fandom, so maybe you guys will like it! Also, depending on how it goes, I'm gonna consider making more for other characters, whachu say? Tell me what you thought and I hope you enjoy!~ ♥

Part 2 here!

× he's a wolf hybrid, and the workers at the shelter warn you that he's feral as you pass by where he was locked

× it seems he was in an illegal fighting ring and nobody could get close to him even if his living conditions now were much better than the hell hole he lived in before

× he growled, scratched, yelled, overall he needed so much help

× normally that would've been very intimidating to you but while the workers tried to push you towards some bunny or dog hybrids they had around, you just froze because the mf said they were considering sacrificing him

× like wHat the fuck?? he's a human being?????? sure he has a tail but what????????

× and you just foken went crazy for a moment cuz you didn't even see him in his cage, he was hiding somewhere under the bundle of blankets he had, probably asleep

× so you just went mental, demanding an explanation because hybrid shelters do not and should not sacrifice a person

× and your increasing yelling just made all the hybrids anxious

× and Bakugou heard everything [who wouldn't]

× i shit you not, the employee tried to explain why

× legit said cuz he's aggressive

× Bitch I'd be aggressive too! I'd bite your jugular off

× course, security was called but you already prepared to call the police, Hybrid Protection Services, your lawyer, your friends, the president, you name it

× and that's when you said you're adopting whoever was under the blankets. NOW.

× always hated the word adopting, but you were looking to give a hybrid a chance since you finally had a spare bedroom in your new apartment

× so like security and the worker just look at each other cuz who tf is gonna be the brave soul to go inside the cage to retrieve Bakugou Katsuki and get rid of you both already

× you're just staring at them like u srs bro? so you just send them to do the paperwork while you decide to go in yourself because you needed to get out of that place ASAP to still contact HPS on this shelter

× security stayed by the door while you hesitantly walked towards the blanket bundle [not so brave anymore] cuz why did that dude have his gun out??????

× but when you approached the bundle and kneeled in front of it you noticed movement

× a fluffy sand yellow tail suddenly came to view and it was big, slowly moving from side to side

× so with the gentlest voice you could muster [after screaming your lungs out moments ago] you tried to talk to whoever was underneath

× you introduced yourself and said you're here to take them home but got nothing, just casual tail movement

× Big Hunkus Brutus Security Guardus™ was getting impatient so he told you to just "fuckin put the collar and leash on the stupid beast" and you just 🙃 fucking excuse u?? while turning towards him

× it was a delicate time and you needed to take it slow, and anyway you knew you'd get that crap off your [hopefully] new friend as soon as possible

× what you didn't expect was the guard to freeze and raise his gun again, but was pointing above your head, not even looking in your eyes

× so you turn and meet a naked chest, scarred, with recent bruising on and big

× looking up you see Bakugou Katsuki, ruffled blonde hair, wild in all directions, red eyes harsh and staring at the guy behind you, only some pants on his form and tail still waving very slowly behind him

× while Chunkus Brutus trembled in place, gun shaking in hands, you were in the fuckin middle of it all

× what you didn't expect is the hybrid to take the collar in your hands and wrap it around his neck, now looking at you, expression still harsh but this time it didn't scream murder [and then grabbed a shirt, thank the heavens]

× progress? making friends? good first impressions?

× na lol you wish but that's spoilers 👀

× the process of adoption went smoothly, and when I say smoothly I mean Robustus Dumbus Brutus behind both of you with his hand still on his gun while all the workers gathered around to see the crazy insane person that adopted The Devil™, the guy that told you about the sacrificing was actually filing the paperwork as fast as possible under the intense gaze of the wolf

× and Bakugou was standing very close to you, btw, like i can feel your body heat close

× he was compliant at first, when you got in the car you started rambling about your house and how he has a room while trying to take the collar off him but he grabbed your hands

× like insanely fast, one blink and firm grip on your hands

× "i ain't gon be your fuckin pet, understood?" he growled at you but made no movement to bolt and run away

× and you just wanted to roll your eyes cuz ok he can kill you anytime but like didn't he get the message when you screamed back there? [also there was this sense of security you had around him or maybe you were just really dumb]

× so when you said you weren't looking for a pet but to help someone and maybe a friend and roommate, he just narrowed his eyes at you

× suspish human, wild doggo no trust

× anywho he took the collar off himself [like extra fast] but you explained that you are going to get him a bracelet or something less degrading since he still needed something with the information tag to have on himself so police will know he's no stray and he wouldn't end in the same craphole again

× journey home was silent, like eery silent

× he just looked out the window intensely, you noticed how he focused on every sign and turn

× you considered asking him questions but honestly with his past you doubted he would even answer so you just started to ramble about your home, stuff you could do around the city [which caught his attention], items you'd have to go buy for him, like clothes, shampoo, any special food, the bracelet

× he stopped looking out the window and just looked at you

× ok he was intensely staring at your side, basically drilling a hole in your cheek with those crimson eyes and it was making you N e r v o u s because making new friends is hard when you're just vomiting monologs, all while driving

× buying things was awkward to say at least, special hybrid stores were rare and for a guy his size it was even more difficult to find anything, which ended up in getting normal clothes and deciding to adjust them for his tail

× while grocery shopping you discovered he actually knew very well what he wanted after a lot of questioning from you

× he finally sighed at your persistent act and just threw stuff in the shopping cart, a surprising amount of spices too

× now for the bracelet part... you decided to spend more on a code that could be scanned to identify him rather than the distasteful ones with name and who owns him

× good thing you planned ahead a long time ago and saved money but you did notice his sharp eyes on you whenever you paid

× and his grunts and judgemental looks at other people with hybrids

× it's as if he wanted to say something, anything, but was stopping himself, which lowkey worried you because from what you heard Bakugou's supposed to be very vocal

× maybe he was glad to be out of the shelter, you know you'd be

× you get home and he follows you to your house, again giving him another chance to bolt somewhere away from you but c'mon both of you knew he'd outrun you so why force him, just let him take his time

× "So this is your room" shook him to the core, legit he just stood silent in the hallway as you presented your house calmly

× sniffing around

× so much sniffing around, tail low while he checked every corner

× once he did decide to check his bedroom, he closed the door leaving you to set everything up

× what you didn't know is that he looked around, shaking with anger

× this is what normal people have?

× sat on the edge of the most confortable bed he's ever had and hoped the idiots of his friends managed to get something like this too

× and the shitshow began when you called him for dinner

× not enough salt, not enough spices

× he was a pain in the ass and as he let go, little by little you started to see him for who he was

× this, this was Bakugou Katsuki, the guy that started to scold you because of the seasoning of the food

× it formed a bond between you, the start of you seeing his real personality

× a Mom™

× slowly started owning the house, although you found it hilarious

× next day you found him cooking breakfast with such an ease it shocked you to the core

× "The fuck you lookin' at?" as he puts a plate of pancakes in front of your

× you just lowkey uwu when you realize he's waiting for your approval as you ate and I swear to you, best pancakes ever

× chest puffed when you complimented his food and this was the first time he mentioned something about his past; seems he had to cook for everyone at the fighting ring he was at, but he didn't mention more

× talking about his past took forever, putting together bits and pieces he mentioned, yet they were so little

× he'd go silent after mentioning his [what you assumed] friends

× if you asked or pressed too much he'd click his tongue or snap at you

× not everything was dandy though; yes, he was a good roommate, but he did have THE attitude

× but not as the people at the shelter made it to be, like he'd snap at you from time to time but it would get better as he'd start to trust you

× ok, ok, hear me out,,,,

× play with his hair

× it happened by accident; you started to have this tradition after a couple of months of living together: movie nights

× he really liked action stuff but both your dirty secret was watching those shitty horror movies and make fun of everyone in them, so every Friday Night was Movie Night

× he just threw himself on the couch and his hair looked puffy and those adorable wolf ears were twitching, you straightforwardly asked him if you could play with it

× [ask if you don't want your hand bit off]

× he scoffed

× silence

× when he nodded and looked away, you squealed and started scratching, just playing with his hair, mindlessly doing so while snickering at the TV when movement caught your attention

× he was wiggling his tail softly

× you guys never mentioned it but now he sits down on the sofa head close to you on a pillow and wait for them god sent scratches; will 100% roll his eyes and scoff at you when you start, acting like YOU want this

× TERRITORIAL AS FUCK

× seriously glares at whoever comes inside the house

× has a problem with every single soul since they dirty his home

× you don't notice it first but he finally starts calling your house home and that's the ultimate progress

× boy had a lot of hardships in his life so he appreciates what he has

× yet it is very, very hard to gain his trust at first

× when you finally do though? he's a loyal friend forever

× he's thankful to have you

× will never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever tell you

× his actions speak for him

× you're part of his pack now

× but seriously wash the dishes or you'll die.

#bakugou katsuki x reader #boku no hero academia #bnha #my hero academia #noire writes #hybrid!au #hybrid!bakugou #bakugou x reader

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activatingaggro · 6 years

Text

SIPARA NZINGA | 8.3 sweeps / 18 years old

off the western coast of hamavet, the farthest continent

(6,161 words)

There's bubbles still in your flaps when the gate opens, and you can finally step out.

The first hall that Wilcox leads you down is surreal! It's not so much a building, as it is a dome: the walls are curved high above you, high enough that her horns aren't even scraping the ceiling, and they're glass all the way through. You can see the water outside, sloshing against the glass, and the fish trudging through it. (Floating? Swimming?) There's goosebumps pricking on your skin from the air down here, but when you place your hand against the glass, it's even colder.

"Come along now, miss," Wilcox says, and you startle, turn on your heel to follow.

When ID had told you that he had a proposition for you, you hadn't quite trusted him! You and him.. well, you're complicated, right now, that's the problem. He lied to you. He lied to you, and abandoned you, and he didn't care enough to fix it, not for an entire half-sweep. And what's an apology to fucking that? You'd cried over him, for fuck's sake, and you'd made Pheres deal with it, for perigees and perigees.

.. but a half-sweep isn't too long, when the two of you'll live for at least three dozen of 'em. That's what he keeps reminding you, each time you start to snarl. And how're you supposed to stay mad, when he gives you opportunities like this? Proposition, he said, but this's a fucking favour, more like. "There's a fuschia looking for geneticists, my little hellion," he'd told you, all coy over the husktop, just this side of cloying, "and she's under the Queenpin's thumb, so I could get you in. It's research, ashmote, and more technology than you've ever seen in one place. Isn't this the sort of thing you do?"

You'd been a little suspicious, but how were you supposed to say no to that? Research! Actual research, in a field where they needed you, and where you could work with people for the first time - properly, without having to hide what you know, or how you learned it. You don't know much about ID's boss, but you know plenty about his business. And what's one gray-eyed pupa's education source, when everyone here was probably illegal as fuck?

Illegal, or fuschia.

He hadn't mentioned Wilcox was so tall, though. Or that she was quite this fuschia.

"This is the main lab," she tells you now, peering back over her shoulder. You don't like looking at her, much! ID loves seadwellers, but you've always been with Pheres: there's something about the way their skin moves that makes your skin crawl. It's too dull in spots where it ought to be bright! The fat's too thick, in all the places it shouldn't be at all. And when she smiles at you, it wrinkles her cheeks, and right under her eyes, and nowhere else.

Her pink eyes.

"I think you'll like it. I enjoyed the work that, ah, monseiur Comedy sent our way. You work on helminths?"

She's really, really tall.

"I read your papers," she prompts.

"Yeah -" There's an octopus on the wall, watching you through the glass as you walk through the next hall. There's seadwellers everywhere, clustered together at the tables, and.. there's only ten or so, scattered throughout the room, but this is more than you've ever seen in one place before. You draw your arms in closer, and if you're half-cuddling your bag, fuck anyone that'd look twice. "Um. Wait, nah, girl, soz. I work with, like, ectoparasites! Annelids, mostly. My base stock was, like, nereididae, originally, but I bred 'em to be calcified, and ---"

BT: <))) I told Wilcox I don't need help > So she sent you anyway <

BT: <))) Charming > She's wasting everyone's time <

AA: loool.

AA: mb you don't need help, bb. mb you need G U I D A N C E. >;}

BT: <))) HA >

BT: <))) Of course > Why wouldn't I need help from a hemoanon <

BT: <))) Sweeps of education > But all of that blunts in the face of .

BT: <))) What > Bootleg schoolfeeds? <

AA: bb, pls.

AA: it's stolen orn fucking bust.

BT: <))) Of course > What was I thinking? <

BT: <))) Empress fucking forbid it's not illegal <

BT: <))) Because the rest of this isn't bad enough <

BT: <))) I'm in the lab > If you fuck up my prototype <

BT: <))) I'm feeding you to it >

"And who," she drawls, peering at you over her nose, "are you?"

Rostik Taalik is a lot of things. She's the only other landdweller here, for starters, even with the fins behind her ears. She's the only person your size, with barely four inches on you. She's one of the only folks your age, and she’s got the longest eyelashes you’ve ever seen on a troll.

And all of that means she's your designated lab partner for the night, as you decided when you walked in. Unfortunately, as it turns out, she's also a huge bulge munch.

"Fuuhao," you drawl right back, spite so thick that it feels like it ought to catch on your tongue. Your eyes are gray and your horns are capped for the night, the blunted edges of the round-end chafing at your skull each time you move, but you're not a lowblood, right now, and you're not going to let some upstart indigo start acting like she's got anything above you. "We spoke online, nookmunch. Now, scoot over, I'm sitting down here."

"Wilcox said you're working on pupation. And I'm supposed to help out." The device she's been staring at is big enough that it takes up a whole corner of the room. It looks sort of like a recuperacoon, if someone made a coon out of sopor: it's ridged like one, with the gentle fall and rise of any healthy device, but the sides are slick with slime that seeps out of it with every passing second, sliding towards the vents on the ground with the careless viscosity of pudding.

When you touch it, the slime clings in strings to your palm when you tug it away.

"Brilliant," Taalik says from behind you, dry. "Should I wait while you lick it?"

"Nah, dude, hard pass on that shit." You wipe off your hand on your pants, then turn to face her.

She's got purple all the way through her eyes already, and more jewelry in her face than you'd see in a tongue. She's playing with the ring in her lip as she watches you, eyes half-lidded, and thank god she's one of those folks who can't hide shit: her ears are round, her face is finned, but she's low enough that she doesn't make your skin crawl, like the fish, and her contempt's clear.

You might be in gray, but you know that look. She's already making up her mind on what caste you are, and how she feels about that.

Well, fuck her. She wants to make decisions? So are you.

"So, like, lemme see if I've got this straight. You want to, like -" You wish you had gum to chew! But your fangs are too sharp for that shit: the last time you'd stolen a pack from Laledy and tried it, you'd half slit your tongue. So you settle for shoving your thumbs into your pants, horns down just to show her how much you don't fucking care. "Start a second pupation, yeah? Crack us open, scrape out the bits, and start it over. But slight problem there, dude. You gonna breed up new new imaginal discs? 'cause we're kinda all out."

"And if you don't have those -"

She clicks her tongue at you, then flips her braids over her shoulder. "Congratulations. You've read a book.” She curls her lip at you, all contempt, and.. you should be focusing on that, but her lipliner’s tighter than you’ve ever managed. You’re not sure if you’re impressed, or if you hate it. “But obviously not enough, because you're still behind. We can insert that shit with viral carriers, dumbass. Set it up however they want. Venomsacks, broader shoulders, a bigger rack, different chrome - it's all in the research notes. Or did Wilcox not share that?"

"I've read the book, dude." You should pop her, honestly! Establish dominance the old-fashioned way: flip the laptop, that coffee, and the table right onto her lap, and see if she's still going to sass you after that. But you don't want to start a fight in the middle of the lab on your third night here. "But never mind all of the spy shit."

(The spy shit. You can't believe you're in coon with a bunch of seadweller fucking rebels.. and this girl.)

"What about the disks for the rest of you? How the fuck are you gonna keep the bits that you want coming back properly?"

"Never mind. Did Wilcox send you to waste my time?" She looks like a land-dweller, but when she blinks at you, languid, it's like watching one of the fish. The way she does it is all fucking wrong. "Because," she says, flat, turning her attention back to her husktop, "that's shit we've already got covered. When you enter the cocoon, it'll pick up on your pre-coded disks."

"You mean the ones that melted in the second instar?" you mock, flipping your ears forward, and she looks back up.

AA: tweet tweet, mothernfuckern.

AA: do i gotta lay out, like, birndseed to get you to come out? bc if so: n/n/n, soz, am not doing it.

AA: you get shitty old brneadcrnumbs like evernyone else, and you will fucking like it.

LB: how could I refuse with that kind of an offering

LB: what’s going on?

AA: ty, ty. i knew you'd fucking love it.

AA: i'm tlking to ppl who arne kind of yrn ppl. i mean, not rnly, they'rne all fucking fish? but they'rne Y RN P E O P L E kind of ppl.

AA: so i was wonderning if you can gimme any deets?

AA: and i'll give you deets back, ofc. >:}

LB: you’ll have to give deets to get deets tbh

LB: my kind of fish people doesn’t give me a lot to work with

AA: jfc, dude.

AA: 'kay, bettern way of putting it. >:}

AA: have you hearnd anything abt a nearn-tyrnian doing, like, rnesearnch? igenetics rnesearnch?

LB: hmm

LB: I think I know who you’re talking about

LB: been tapping up pre-ascension scientists for something or other right?

AA: lol, y.

LB: what do you need on her?

AA: uhhh. idk, dude, yrn the infotrnoll.

AA: how about..

AA: how likely is she gonna trny to shove me in a cocoon? >:}

AA: is that a thing that, like, ppl arne sayin'?

LB: she’s tapping you?

AA; lmfao, n.

AA: she tapped me like, a week ago.

LB:

LB: and you’re asking me this now

AA: looool.

AA: yeah, well, bettern now than nevern, rnight?

AA: she's a fish, i ain't exactly, like, supern wornrnied, herne. so chillll. i've filleted bettern folks than hern. >:}

AA: and i got info forn you in exchange, so, like, don't F U S S.

AA: how would you feel if you could just totes change yrn face?

LB: ok well I haven’t heard of anyone getting ganked and so far everyone I know of has responded to quads

LB: but also no one has left

LB: does Hadean even know where you are

AA: 'kay, cool.

AA: that's abt all i need to know, lmao. like, i'm prnetty surne nobodies bailed, bc this is fucking wicked?

AA: but y, wanted to check. >:}

AA: and ofc he doesssssss.

AA: wtf kinda q is that?

LB: idk he seems like he’d be a little freaked out about you doing shit on a seadweller’s turf

LB: it’s a little different than taking a fish down in the ring

LB: do you have an escape plan?

AA: loool.

AA: he prnobs is, lbrn.

AA: but w/e, he trnusts me to handle my shit, and i trnust him to handle his.

LB: what will you do if things go bad?

AA: dude, i'm yrn doctorn, yrn not mine. dnw abt it, 'kay?

AA: but fwiw, i totes have a rnoute alrneady planned.

AA: and if anything goes 2spoopy4me, i will pop down a vent, get out into the shipbay, and follow the sewage outlet all the way back up top.

AA: nbddd. evernyone else herne is like, fucking six footerns, and it's a squeeze forn M E.

LB: i might not be your doctor but this isn't medical. you did say that she was more my people

LB: and maybe delete your actual plan. are you sure things are encrypted on your end of things

AA: y, y. i'm just sayin' i know what i'm doing, losern. >:}

AA: and ofccccc.

AA: this entirne convo's deleting off my end aftern this shuts, dnw.

LB: what sort of stuff is she working on anyway?

AA: evernybody herne's into genetics. and fixing shit.

AA: like, she gave us a full hourn long goddamn lecturne on abt how grn8 it would be if we could just F I X ppl, instead of culling them.

LB: is there one big project you're working on or a bunch of smaller ones

AA: bunch of tiny ones. but they all feed into one big one.

AA: even tho idk if ppl arne rnealising that yet, lmao.

AA: wtfevernnn, waderns arne fucking dumb. >:}

LB: is everyone else there a seadweller?

LB: also do you know what the big project is yet

AA: y, me and m arne the only airnsacks.

AA: and y. loool.

AA:

AA: how would you feel if you could just totes change yrn face?

AA: it's that. >:}

LB: oh huh

LB: definitely useful

LB: literally no way the empire would like that

LB: also whose m

AA: the othern airnsack herne, brnah.

AA: so therne's yrn info. tyvm forn yrns, yrn aid has been apprneciated.

AA: we cool?

LB: yeah sure

LB: be safe

AA: loool. you too.

AA: don't get locked in any morne basements, bb.

You’ll give props where props are due. When you hit Taalik, she barely flinches. She just pauses, rubbing her jaw like she’s more shocked than anything else, and watches you.

It takes a moment to swallow the snarl trying to rip all the way out of your throat. But you manage to keep it down to nothing more than a rattle. “I’d, like, say now you apologise,” you sniff, “but obvs your lusus didn’t raise you properly, so what-the-fuck-ever.”

“And what,” she says, her fingers still resting on the pale spot on her jaw, “am I apologising for?”

If you’d had more time, you should've gone for her nose.

(But it’s a cute nose. You don’t want to break it, mostly, not until she starts talking.)

“We’ll just pay off the lowbloods,” you mock, “and get them to test it. Like - are you for real? You’re just going to pluck some poor kids off the street, and turn them into - like - fucking labrats?”

“Would you rather we didn’t pay them?” She finally lets go of her jaw, and part of you wants to bolt back when she steps in. She’s indigo. Even if she wasn’t high enough to make your skin crawl, there’s something uncanny about her, and the way she moves. The way she smiles, on the rare occasions you’ve wrestled one out of her.

(Dry, mean, at everyone else’s expense - but still a smile.)

Taalik’s the best out of everyone in this lab. She’s the only other landdweller, and when you’re surrounded by gills.. well, that’s worth more than just chrome, isn’t it? But you’ve watched when her sleeves slide up, taken in the tight coils of her arms when she’s getting annoyed enough to start snatching things. She might be the only one you want to deal with..

But that doesn’t mean you want her in your space. She’s still indigo, and you’re pretty sure she could make a fair try at ripping you in two.

.. but that doesn’t mean you’ll flinch, either, as she steps in close. “No, I want you to be decent,” you snap, tossing your curls, and you let your shoulder clip her as you stride past. There’s a whuff of something that might be a laugh behind you, but you’re going to fucking ignore that. “C’mon. If we’re gonna start planning for test subjects, anyway, dude, we ought to do it right. Pay some olives - if we want this to work on everyone, we might as well start with the median, anyway..”

AA: pheeeeeern.

AA: wtf do you do when someone's rneally, rneally cute.

AA: but also, like, yrn prnetty surne they'rne legit 100% chaotic evil.

RS: / mmm / my assumption / personally / has always been to pile them /

RS: / but i think hadean might have some objections to that /

AA: hey!

AA: fuck off, i'm chaotic neutrnal at best, tyvm.

At the end of the second week, everything goes to fucking hell.

Pulling an all-day work session had been kind of dumb. If Hadean was here, he would've hauled you forcibly to your 'coon after the first six hours - but he isn't here, and you've got to take advantage of that. When Taalik had drifted off to sleep, you'd kept working with half a mind of impressing her.

Or, no - not impressing her. Proving her right! She's been leaning on you more and more over the last two weeks, and last night, she'd asked you if you knew how to set up a time-released enzyme package.

By the time you'd found out you didn't, it was too late to ask for help, and the only thing that mattered was fucking doing it. If the sun was up by the time you managed, who cared? You'd done it.

And now you were going to haul back coffee and waffles before she woke up, so you could hold it over her in the best kind of way.

Or, at least, that was the plan. There's voices drifting out of the cafeteria when you come up near, which's unusual enough to make you pause.

"I still think this is unneccessary," Wilcox says, and there's something strange enough about her voice that you stop mid-step. The hall's empty, but the door to the cafeteria's open, as always. And it doesn't sound like it's full. "You're not really allowed to be in here, you know?"

There ought to be the clank of forks and plates by this point. Or at least the rip of the nasty protein bars that half of the fish down here eat. Instead, when you flip your ears forward..

Under the whispers, someone's crying.

"Don't worry!" someone else says, and it's a new voice that you haven't heard before. Temasekian, part of your pan pings, helpful, but that's strange: everyone here's further north than that, and you're the last person that Wilcox hauled in. The gates, as she told the lot of you, had closed, and her party had been assembled. Every project had a team. All you had to do now was make them work. "Warrants procured, lah. Nothing illegal here!" A beat. "Hope there's nothing illegal," they - she - teases, and there's amusement soaking her words like salt. "Right, yeah?"

"I don't think you'll believe me if I say no."

"Probably not~!" There's a thump. You should turn and bolt. You should be burrowing deep into the vents now, and heading straight for the dockyard. You should be doing a lot of things, but it feels like your feet are lead.

Not quite lead. You can take a step forward, silent as a mouse, and when you do, around the doorframe, Wilcox comes into view. There's a girl standing in front of her, her hair shining as bright as bone in the dim of the room. Her horns are long enough that they're framing Wilcox's neck, for all that her head's ducked down. If she moved too suddenly, or turned her head, they could slice right into the skin, easy as butter.

Maybe that's why Wilcox has her fins pinned back, for the first time you've seen her. "There's really no need for that," Wilcox tries again, brisk, as the girl steps away. The lighting in the cafeteria is poor, as always: it's been a joke for longer than you've been here that it ought to be replaced, but half of the seadwellers were born in the depths, and they'd objected. (You don't know why you're thinking of this now. You don't know why you're still standing here.)

The lighting is poor, but when Wilcox shifts, it hits her wrists, and the cuffs shine red.

Farther out of sight, there's a shuffle of feet. Then a thud, and a shriek.

The girl pivots to look. You sink into the shadows, your pumpbiscuit racing, but her eyes slide right past you, off into a distance you can't see. "Hey!" she says, and at the same time, Wilcox surges forward, fins flaring out.

Then someone wails. You recognise her voice: Hoshio, you think, the one with the fins shaped like the summer sun. "Wrong answer," someone else says, light. Their voice's deeper than the white-haired girls. "Sorry, sweetheart! Want to try again?"

"Hdijah!" the girl snaps. "Be nice! Royalty!"

You turn on your heel, and bolt.

Taalik's awake when you slide the door open. (Slide, not slam: if everyone's in the cafeteria, well, the two of you've been overlooked. No point in drawing attention in, now.) She's half-sprawled over your desk, shoulders slouched, her braids half-out of the twist she'd pulled them into.

"What's going on?" she asks, barely looking up. She's got such a long neck! Every time you look at it, you think she ought to have gills there, but the skin's smooth as the skin of her hands.

"Imps."

"Really. Did Falric finally succeed in summoning demons? Or did you just get into the mind honey?" She drags her finger across the screen. The video scrolls forward. The girl is saying something peppily about mascara, and eyeliner, and the best way to repel an auspistice with both --

So you slap your palm down in the center of it, and Taalik jerks her head up so quickly, you think she's going to bite you. If it was anyone else, she'd have hissed at you. As is, she just stares, eyelashes fanning over her eyes, like she thinks that makes her look unimpressed. "I should break your hand for that," she says, but she doesn't so much as move. "What, Fuuhao?"

"Imperials," you say, slowly, "are in the facility, and they arrested Wilcox, and they snapped Hoshio's arm. Like, she doesn't fucking have one, anymore. So what d'you think they're gonna do to me and you?"

She considers you for a moment. Then she sighs, pushes back her chair in a scrape of metal on metal. "Well. You better go, then. Like hell they'll do anything to me." She's so brisk. "But you?" Side-long, she looks at you. "No point in hanging around."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You've got dirt in your veins, dumbass. Are we really going to argue about that?" She's bustling along, even as you're sidling back towards the bathroom. There's a vent you'd scoped out there, the first night. It's just big enough for you to fit into, if you duck your horns, and you'd spent an hour each night since then tracking it to the shipyard, and counting how many steps it takes. You hadn't had the opportunity to try it, yet, but. It can't be too hard. You know you'll fit.

It just won't be pleasant, but when you think of going back into the hallway -

You won't. Better the vents.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm leaving," you say instead, cracking the door.

She's shoving things into the bag, but she looks up. The look isn’t quite a smile! It’s more.. a curl of her lips, all dry and brittle, like that’s the only way she knows how to. "Try not to die."

That's about as friendly as you're going to get, you think.

The scramble through the vents is about as cramped as you expect. But if you keep your horns down, at least, they don't scrape, and there's enough clunks and sighs of machinery that no one thinks to look up.

AA: ico.

AA: are you here?

AA: because i kind of

AA: aw, shit.

AA: everything’s kind of fucked up right now, and i really, really could use some help.

You’re halfway across the shipbay when the door crashes open, and the girl saunters in.

(Not the girl. Nanako Bonjou, ID had told you, words rattling across the front of your screen so quickly that you’d barely had time to read them. Twelve sweeps, oliveblood with strong telekinesis, IPC --

Where’s the rest of her battery, sweetheart? Because fuck her, you’re going to have to worry about the rest of that, and at least some of them ought to be sick --)

“Où es-tu?” Nanako calls out. “Où es-tu, ma petit souris? Montre-toi! Montre-toi, où que tu sois!”

The ground is dry under foot, and you’ve had sweeps of practice. The first thing you’d done, back in the room, was strip off your boots: now you’re down to socks, and when you launch yourself across the pavement, it’s as silent as you can manage. Her ears are flat, inflexible little things! She can’t hear you, if you try hard enough.

If you can keep your pumpbiscuit from giving you away. It’s pounding like a drum, so loud that you can barely here her off in the distance. All you want to do is get to the sewage outlet, but that’s out in the open, right where she can see it. Right now, she doesn’t know you’re here.

So you dive underneath one of the ships, instead, wriggling and kicking. The metal scrapes at your skin, and you have to slow down so that it doesn’t tear. What if they spot the blood, and try to catalogue it? What if your name comes up? You’ve never paid that much attention to science. You don’t know what they could do with a piece of hair, or a scrape of skin, or blood --

Fear is hard. You’ve never been one to be afraid of anything, not really, and if you hadn’t spent so much time calming Pheres down, you’re not sure you’d recognise the way your hands are going clammy, or the tightness in your chest. But this girl could kill you.

This girl will kill you, if she can. Taalik’s an indigo. The rest of the scientists are all violets -

- and her partner had still snapped Hoshio’s arm like it was so much tinder.

What’s a neck, compared to that?

“Sounis,” Nanako sings, and you can see her boots as they step by. You don’t breathe. Your phone is on silent, but you don’t dare to check it: ID’s advice had been for you to get the fuck out, and not wait for him to do something to help you.

(”You’ve gone and buried yourself under a ton of saltwater, darling,” he’d said, distressed: “I’m going to try, but I just don’t know what you want me to do, here!”)

(Like he hadn’t been the one to tell you about this.)

(It’s not fair to cling to his coat-tails: you’re not seven anymore, and he’s not your quadrant. But part of you’s resentful all the same.)

THat’s fine, though. You’ll make it be fine. You haven’t relied on ID in a half-sweep: you don’t need him now, not when it’s just you and a single girl in the bay. You’ll fight her yourself, if you need to, and with that thought, you slink out from under the ship enough to look.

When you peer out, she’s standing in front of the sewer outlet, just waiting.

That’s fine.

You don’t know much about ships. But you know enough to recognise a HMS Starbruiser when you see it, after all the nights Riccin spent trying to explain them to you. “They’re the fucking best,” she’d told you, practically curling in on herself from enthusiasm, “and they’re pure magnesium, girl, that’s the best part about it. Pure fucking - you can’t get better than that, in terms of weight, in terms of goddamn quality.” They were so expensive that the two of you’d barely been able to understand the price, back when she’d finally gone and found a listing online. And then, barely a perigee later, they’d all been recalled.

Except this one, apparently. There’s a fuel line, right above your head, brushing against your ears. When you sidle back and give it a yank, just hard enough for your prosthetic to stir, the line gives.

Another yank, and it gives.

The spray of gas hitting the ground sounds like thunder in the silence of the hall. She must hear it. She has to. So you’re sidling back before it’s even hit the ground, and as soon as you’re back on your feet, you lean forward and give the back of the ship a shove. The fangs of your prosthetic biting in stings, more than it should after two weeks of healing. You can almost feel the siphon of blood as it pulls in -

- but it’s worth it, because a moment later, when you shove the ship again, the brake snaps somewhere underneath it. It lurches forward, uneasily at first, but with the minor slope of the ground rapidly giving it momentum. You’ve only got a second to fumble your lighter out of your pocket. A flick of the switch, then you toss it over your shoulder, hands shaking.

You don’t stay to watch. You’re already bolting when there’s a sizzle behind you, and then, a scarce second later, you feel the heat as the fuel line catches fire.

It’s when the ship’s hull catches fire that you hear it, though: the crackle of metal catching flame, and the shriek of the bolts, already beginning to protest under the new heat. Ducking behind a new ship, there’s a shriek and crumple of metal behind you, loud enough that it makes your soundflaps pin.

But you have to keep moving. There’s another ship that you give a shove, hard enough that it leaves you shaking, but it’s sliding right towards the flaming mess in the center. The air’s full of smoke already, black and billowing up at your feet, not at all deterred by the shriek of the sprinklers above flicking on. The smoke tickles at your lungs. It burns at your throat, and pulling your shirt over your nose doesn’t do anything to stop it. Pulling up the hood of your jacket helps a little, but not much.

It’s fine, you remind yourself. You’re not going to be here long, and the fish inside the labs -

- well, if they’re still alive, you hope you didn’t just blow up their ship.

(You hope Taalik’ll be fine. “Try not to die,” she’d told you, and you didn’t even think to say anything back.)

There’s crates along the side of the shipbay. You duck into those, and now.. all you have to do is wait. So you count to sixty, hidden neatly behind the cargo, and try to breathe in through your mouth. The girl will have bolted for the ships. IPC agent, ID had said, and an expensive model like a Starbruiser - well, it’s got to have been hers, doesn’t it?

And even if it isn’t, there’s six tons of water above you, and more below. A single crack in the frame of this place will drown the lot of you, from the fuschia on down. She’s a telekinetic. She’s probably securing a net over the flames even right now, siphoning out the oxygen and snuffing them before anything can blow.

It’s been sixty seconds. She has to. And in the meanwhile, the smoke’s burning all the way through your lungs, and you know the sort of damage that does. The sort of shit you’re probably breathing in.

(You didn’t get away from the explosion as quickly as you should’ve, you think. Your flaps hurt. Your bulbs hurt. Your body hurts, in a way you can’t tell if it’s from blood loss, or the explosion, and that’s doing nothing to stop the frantic patter of your heart.)

She’s going to be at the ship, and you have to go, you have to go now. So you take a shaky breath, you duck out of your hiding place, and you make for the sewage outlet.

She’s not there. It’s clear, and there’s a weight off your shoulders. The air is full of smoke, and your body aches, and she’s going to kill you if she finds you, but - she didn’t. She isn’t going to. And you’re half-way into the pipe when something snatches you by the back of the neck, and hauls you out.

There’s a burn on her cheek, shining a sickly green in the light. Her eyes are red, red as the cuffs around Wilcox’s wrist, and you’re twisting to swing a fist right in her face before you’ve even processed who you’re looking at.

It’s like punching a wall. You shriek, pulling away from her, curling your arm in on yourself, and she just sighs, shaking her head. There’s a thousand warning notes flashing in front of your eyes, wailing about damage, and the fangs of your prosthetic are sinking in, tighter and tighter, to try and fix it.

“Merci, ma sounis,” she scolds you. There’s soot on her nose. The edges of her hairs are burned black, frayed in the dark. “Hadn’t run, wouldn’t have chased, yeah? But you ran! And you broke things. Friend built ship! What supposed to say? Rebel blew it up? Shame on you.”

You want to say something witty. All that comes out is a snarl, instead, but all of your thrashing isn’t doing anything to free you: it’s like being held by iron, and the only result you get is an exasperated cluck. “Aah. How old you? Seven? Wilcox all wrong, wrong, wrong, shouldn’t be done. Should’ve known better. Bad enough, pulling guppies in.”

“Can no do nothing about guppies. But mice?” She shakes her head, sending the white locks flying. “Sorry,” she says, and maybe it’s even real. You don’t care. There’s brown crowding your eyes, blocked only by the way you keep blinking, and you - you don’t even know why you’re bothering, honestly. She’s going to cull you, and you don’t know what you’re going to do, and you didn’t tell Hadean, and you didn’t tell Pheres, and -

"Sorry,” she says again, and draws her hand back again. This time, you can’t exactly stop her, not with your prosthetic shattered. All you can do is thrash, but a heel to the gut doesn’t do anything - your leg bounces off of her psi like armor, and her grip is iron. Your hood falls back. All you can do is pin your ears back, and hiss.

(You’re going to die, and nobody is ever going to know.)

But when your hood falls, her face blanches. “Poivre?” she breathes, and then she takes a step back. A moment later, she seems to realise you’re still in her hand: she drops your collar, as quick as she’d snatched you up, and when you land on your feet, already staggering back, she doesn’t try to follow you.Her face’s as pale as her hair. Only for a moment, though, and then there’s green flooding her cheeks, all at once. Her hand falls. Your pumpbiscuit is pounding like a drum, too loud for you to make out more than the shapes of the words that she’s saying.But there’s a hand on her mouth, and when your hiss fades into a cough, wet and raspy even past the thump of your blood, just like that, something in her crumples.She doesn’t turn away from you. She just takes a step back, and then another, her eyes taking you in like she’s seeing you for the first time.You’re missing something, here. You should figure it out - but all you can think about is the outlet, right behind her. When you take a shaky step towards it, one hand on your throat, she doesn’t move. And even the second doesn’t illict a reaction.So you dive into the pipe, instead, and run.

#[drabbles]#sipara nzinga

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nerdwiththehat · 5 years

Text

#DemDebate night one:

Everyone's way too prepared.

So I said I wasn’t going to live-tweet the debates because I did that in 2016 and MAN did it make me insufferable online.

Buuuuut I also didn’t make a full write-up, I just scribbled a shit-ton of notes on my laptop and now I’m looking back at it the next morning and holy shit I must have been drunk as hell by minute three because I made no sense so fuck it I’ll just keep doing this.

here we go kids

BETO DID HIS ENTIRE SECOND PHRASE IN SPANISH UH

woo woo pass the ERA

Everyone's answering with such long lead-ins - the first person who gives an ANSWER in the first quarter-sentence gets an award

Bill De Blasio keeps grinning DIRECTLY at the camera. I'm deceased.

And GIVE HIM THE BONUS Bill De Blasio answered the question in the first 5 words. What a mans. AND HE CALLED IT OUT. he CALLED OUT THE PARTY-LINE TOEING. WHY AM I OKAY WITH BILL DE BLASIO NOW??

Jay Inslee said unions give him the award too. I mean, he didn't say a thing about the minimum wage, but he did say some nice stuff about clean energy, sticking it to Trump, and some other stuff. I do like him, I guess?

Tim Ryan says "China" in the same tone as Donald Trump hee hee

WoW! so it turns out if you ask Liz a specific question she gives you a FULL answer and I fucking love it god damn keep doing that. Stop giving her the junk questions for lead-ins and complaints.

Healthcare! It's time. Is it time to abolish private health insurance? Looks like... Bill, and Liz? Why do I like them?

Amy Klobuchar is weird and she's dodging the question every time she gets asked. They asked her why she wasn't going to abolish private insurance - she made a beer joke and talked about big pharma. That's... not the answer we were looking for.

Talking with Liz about Medicare for all! They asked her a direct question and she went FULL policy on them! Numbers on medical bills! Numbers on people who do and don't have insurance! I know why we elected her here and it's because she does THAT. (Also nice jacket Liz big ups I like the purple ^^) Healthcare is a human right!

Talking to beto! Let's see if he does THE THING again. He has a good anecdote! I like his opinions on universal healthcare, but he's not signed on for Medicare for all. Good notes on mental health care!!! Thank u!!! and Planned parenthood shoutout! Not replacing private insuranceandthenholYSHITOUTTANOWHEREEVERYONE JUMPED ON IT

TULSI showed up and actually talked some sense. The policy matters are important, but if we're going to stand on a stage arguing about what parts we're doing, we're not getting actionable.

JAY INSLEE COMING OUT SWINGING TO PROTECT ABORTION RIGHTS AND CONTRACEPTION

JULIAN CASTRO TRIED VERY HARD AND I SUPPORT HIM BUT ALSO DROPPING TRANS WOMEN INTO THE DEBATE WASN'T THE RIGHT MOVE

BIG dodge from Liz on the "limitations" on abortion question.

should drug manufacturers be held criminally liable for the opioid crisis? Cory says big yes. I imagine a lot of the candidates will. But, I do like that he's mentioning that arresting your way out of the problem is a huge problem. Beto gets the same question, and starts with aaaaaaaaaaa weed answer but also he has the same god damn point so big support

Immigration after the commercial break! Scores in the first round - Liz lost a point for a lack of full-throttle support for abortion rights. Castro gets the you tried star but also a starbucks gift card for good trans support. Jay Inslee gets some union patches. Beto gets an A- in Spanish class. Bill De Blasio gets a smol flag with ancom stars and a "fuck tankies" t-shirt.

back from the break - let's get to immigration. Specifically, the concentration camps, and the pitable kid pictures.The commentator is trying his best to spit full vitriol at DHS. Castro is banking off his immigration plan, and said "pissed off" on national television. Big ups, but also - he's using executive orders to prop up most of it. Pls say something about legislative reform for the border. Honoring asylum claims! Get them through. Plans for central american refugees! Cory isssssss pulling a Beto and took a DAMN long time to pull it up from his brain. Ending the policies of ICE and bringing back DACA options for current arrivals. Helping the northern triangle and working better with governments in central america. (castro jumped in I'm glad everyone's so support remove 1325 of the nationality act! Don't criminalise desperation! Seperating children is barbaric. and then CORY pulls that out to point at the planned raids this week. I support this discussion but also PLEASE folks stick to point of order. and here's BILL again all but QUOTING A GRANDSON SONG GOD BLESS. I love his tirades but also YOU WEREN'T CALLED ON

TAME ASKED BETO A QUESTION IN SPANISH AND HE'S RESPONDING I NEED AN TRANSLATOR MY SPANISH SUCKS

Beto's the first one to literally say the words no wall. He's still talking and castro's talking OVER HIM. Family case management sounds good but also cost??? Naturalising ALL the DREAMers

Castro is banking off the use of sec.1325 in this debate and I agree with him wholeheartedly. beTO on the other hand is dodging the question like crazy. And Castro's... calling him out on it? I love it!

TOO MUCH YELLING.

JOHN DELANEY KINDLY SHUT THE FUCK UP.

Amy Klobuchar has opinions about border crossings woo woo. You'd want to make sure that you have provisions in place to go after human and drug traffickers - WE HAVE SECTION 18 OF THE US CODES. annnd now she's talking about CEOs and F1 visas. IDK I mean it's important but also NOT THE QUESTION. But hey, first time someone said anything about legislative support.

who the fuck is Tim Ryan seriously and why the fuCK does he say things with such a weird voice sometimes. HOW DOES HE THINK EXECUTIVE AUTHORITY WORKS HE'S LIKE "order Doctors to go to the borders and save the kids" like I like the idea but what the fuc k?

The cameras keep WHIPPING back and forth and it's cracking me up.

Jay Inslee - there's no reason for detention and separation - but... what're you gonna do to REUNITE PEOPLE. (Also dude Charlie Baker stood up to Trump against the muslim ban and he's a republican) "The other DEEEaayyyy" (Oh he's also the gov. that Trump called out on twitter and "threatened" to send muslim refugees to)

CORY BOOKER DIDN'T RAISE HIS HAND BECAUSE HE WANTED TO TALK WHAT A FUCKER. I SUPPORT THE GRIFT BUT WHAT A FUCKER LOL

They tried to send a Hezbollah question to Tulsi Gabbard and she just drove it straight into the ground. I stan but also wooph. She is the person that folks were saying was in the pocket of the middle east, right? She's like cozy with Assad?

oh my god they had to cut them off with the commercial break

it's a goddamn cage-match of prostration to the base - "LETSSSSS GET READY TO HUMBLLLLLE"

I had to take a break and go get a glass of water jfc I'm getting parched.

CHUCK TODD AND RACHEL MADDOW HAD A TOTALLY SEPARATE DESK AND THEY FUCKING /ZOOMED/ OVER TO IT AT WARP SPEED I ALMOST PEED LAUGHING.

- we're less than 50 miles from Parkland. Assault weapons ban? - EVERYONE'S MICS ARE ON. - EVERYONE'S MICS ARE STILL ON. - EVERYONE, EVERYONE'S MICS ARE STILL ON. LESTER SHUT THE FUCK UP. - TIME FOR A COMMERCIAL FUCK ME DEAD - poor chuck todd but also I'm deceased

alright we're back. More robust plans, and teenage activism. What do you do about the hundreds of millions of guns already out there? - Liz is talking town halls - what's the hardest question? "when you're president, how're you going to keep us safe?" - This is a good response, and she's talking about it in the context of a HEALTH EMERGENCY good FUCKING lord THANK YOU lift the CDC moratorium. Should the fed take guns back? no... no answer to the direct question. But, I support her answer! Thank you for not treating it as an across-the-board answer kind of thing. - Booker has a buy-back programme. I think that's good? But he also said assault rifle so now we gotta shame him or something idk I'm not a fucking gun nut. We've let the gun lobby define the debate! Thank you for also touching on it! - Castro gets a question about active shooter drills, and is it a questions of what he's going to do to turn it around. Also awwww his daughter is in the audience we stan. But also LITERALLY no answer besides "we're gonna take back two of three branches on day one" literally what does that mean. - Tim Ryan is saying stuff about... mental health care for kids scared of shootings and supporting the kids who would do shootings? Wait why am I okay with this thank you. - Beto is about to talk about guns this'll be good. background checks good. gun show sales bad. assault rifles no bueno. red flag laws good. Throw it to the kids? I... guess? - Chuck Todd really wants someone to talk about TAKING YOUR GUNS. - Amy Klobuchar thinks about her uncle who hunts deer idk I mean I guess so also GUNS ARE LIKE GAY MARRIAGE OH BOY.

SENATOR THANK YOU

- We're talking supreme court now but CORY STILL WANTS TO TALK GUNS. Licensing is already a requirement up here in the northeast jfc. - SUPREME COURT - we're going to get to 50 votes in the senate to nominate a justice because stacking the senate lol thanks for at least saying it out in the open. - BILL BILL BILL if you nominate someone for the supreme court would you think TurtleMitch would let you nominate someone but he WANTS TO TALK ABOUT GUNS and police for some reason. Oh right also he has mixed race kids that's actually something he should have leaned on a bit more earlier.

HOW LONG DO THESE PEOPLE THINK 20 SECONDS IS.

- Senator Warren - if TURTLEMITCH is still there whatdoyado. WE ARE A DEMOCRACY. the answer is campaign finance reform to get a democratic majority in the senate. I guess. - Mitch McConnell gets called the fuck out lol - How are folks gonna beat the turtleman we'll never knooooooo - JAY INSLEE TRIED TO INTERRUPT AND THEN RACHEL MADDOW CALLED HIM OUT AND TOSSED HIM A CLIMATE CHANGE QUESTION I'm PISS he then TURNED IT ON MITCH. Also, he's staking his claim on climate change and y'know what I'm totally fine with it. - Climate Emergency! ten points to inslee. - Beto has a good plan for removing the dependency on fossil fuels I like - Chuck Todd all but went full hbomberguy and yelling FUCKING AQUAMAN on stage. - Bonus points to Castro for PUERTO RICO - Also paris accords - both castro and klobuchar have said they'd sign back on

Everyone keeps RAISING THEIR HANDS like they're allowed to yell as soon as they've got their finger up.

Time to punch on Tulsi Gabbard for her shitty stances on queer issues woo woo. Let's see how this goes. CORY BOOKER MY BOY CALLING OUT NOT TALKING ABOUT THE KILLING OF BLACK TRANS WOMEN AND SUICIDES OF QUEER KIDS GOOD TALK GOOD TALK BIG LOVE.

time for VOTED QUESTIONS guy asked if we shouldn't do the rwandan genocide again. Beto literally only knows the Rwandan genocide. Someone say Kosovo and watch his head explode. Bill says some stuff about going to war without congressional approval idk man Ryan made himself look like a big dumb doofy doo in front of two service members on stage lol I don't like Tulsi but GET HIM GIRL and NOW he's SUPER anxious and talking about ATTACKS and shit. Him and Tulsi are gonna eat each other. JFC THIS DEBATE.

Threats, right to left:

(IN AS FEW WORDS AS POSSIBLE, PEOPLE)

Nukes

Trump

Nuclear War

Economic threat - china/actual threat - destabilisation of the middle east.

climate change

nukes and climate change

china and climate change

china

russia

Beto wants to prosecute Trump. This'll make news tomorrow, mark my words. Not saying he's totally /wrong/, but it's going to be front-page news tomorrow.

45 seconds wrap ups

GET IT DONE PEOPLE let's see WHO KNOWS HOW TO TELL TIME.

(Ratings are based on the wrap-ups only and are a direct reflection of my mental state and random musings at the time whatever)

Delaney did some neat stuff and said saving the world and unions and shit. 2 reminders, 3 thank-yous. C+

Bill: it matters in the fight for the heart and soul of the party to nominate someone who bad upbring and also WAGE PROMISES. Also free preschool idk man. No reminders! 1 thank-you. B+

Jay Inslee is running because he wants his grandkids to survive climate change. Get committed to making it the top priority. Save ourselves and our children, and our children's children. 1 reminder, 2 thank-yous. B+

Tim Ryan: something about forgotten communities and a throwaway trans comment about running away with the gold and playing offense... he sounds like Jim Webb lol also lET'S PLAY SOME ALPHABET GAMES 3 thank-yous. D-

Tulsi: service above self is what defines the US, but that's not what we have right now. So this must end. "Our White House" 4 times good christ. Lot of random promises and also new??? Century? no reminders 1 thank-you. C+

Julian's is in spanish awesome but also interpreters pls. Also his brother's in congress, too. He wants the nomination but he's probably going to be another housing pick. NO THANK-YOUS :((( B+

Amy: I listen to people. I pass bills. I listened to people and acted. I listen. Listening. I'm someone that can win. Because I listen. I keep winning because I listen. I'm not establishment and I listen. Something about listening. And integrity. 1 thank-you. D+

Cory's family had to move because redlining and he's kinda neat. Lots of lawyering. We win fights by being the best. Stop making it into a high/low fight. This is a referendum on us, and on Trump. I'll show the best of who we are. 1 thank-you. C+

Beto's daughter turned 11 this week and that's cute and also free the kids in concentration camps. We need a new kind of politics directed by the urgency of the nest generation. 2 thank yous A-???

Liz being raised in oklahoma dreamed to be a school teacher, didn't have money for college - and went to commuter college and got involved in law that way. We believe in making government work for everyone. I will fight for you as hard as I fight for my own family. NO THANK YOUS :((( B+

I’m going to do this again for the next few debates, I think? Depending how long my sanity holds out.

#demdebate #debate #ramble

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entomologistologist · 7 years

Text

I was tagged by @arbitrarystrawberry! Thank you! <3

Nickname: Haven't really got one. I have one internet friend who calls me Bean. I almost acquired the nickname Zap, but it didn't work out.

Sign: Political signs with candidates' names on them, mostly.

Favourite music artist: idk man I don't really listen to music by artist. Can I say Amy Grant?

Last tv show watched: uhhhh I keep meaning to watch some King of the Hill but I haven't been doing it. To be honest, I don't remember the last show I watched.

Last movie you watched in theatre: Rouge One. Didn't care for it.

What are you wearing right now: Pajamas.

What do you post: lol who knows. Political stuff (pro-life or anti-SJW mostly). Archie comic scans. Superman and Batman stuff. Spider-Man stuff. The occasional Warrior Cats fanart. Some Christian stuff. Random memes that strike my fancy.

Do you have any other blogs: Nope.

Why did you choose your URL: welllllll gather round, children. I've decided to tell the needlessly long version of this story. I'm warning you, this is way too detailed. PLEASE JUST SKIP TO THE NEXT QUESTION; THIS IS LONG AND BORING.

Okay, so one day a few years ago (it was the year I was taking chemistry, so probably like three years back?), my older sisters stumbled upon a long-cancelled children's cartoon on the TV set called Archie's Weird Mysteries. My sister Talia decided to become an Archie fan, so we all started watching this show ever night at 10pm, when it came on (we don't have no Netflix, no Hulu, no illegal online streaming! we watch things WHEN THEY COME ON).

Meanwhile, my sister Mariah had a story idea that she called her Adventure Psychologist story (at first I wanted to be mean and also include all the backstory of how she came up with her Adventure Psychologist story, since I'm going overboard with the explanations anyhow, but I won't). It was about a psychologist from outer space who did magic psychology on aliens and people. She was obsessed with this story idea. She would never shut up about it. This is important background information.

Now we'll get to the relevant part: The TV station that played Archie's Weird Mysteries had only a couple of actual commercials at a time. The rest of the commercial breaks were filled with promos. One of the shows they advertised was called Dex Hamilton Alien Entomologist. The promo itself was pretty bad (it did not convey any information about the show that is not communicated in the title, although I suppose it did at least define an entomologist as someone who studies bugs), but Mariah saw it and went, "Oh my gosh! An alien entomologist! That is basically the exact same thing as an alien psychologist! I have to watch this show," to which I replied, "wow, Mariah, that's dumb; we watch enough children's cartoons already."

But Mariah wanted to watch it anyway. The first time she tried, she failed because she did not understand time zones. I thought it would be dumb for us to start watching the show, but by the second time she tried to watch it (they only played one thirty-minute episode a week), I had warmed up to it slightly. So the big day when Mariah would watch this show finally rolled around. Talia was going to watch with her, too. I was waaaaay to mature to watch another kid’s show, so I opted to spend the time they were watching TV to go rake the lawn, so I’d be done raking and could afford to spend the rest of Saturday watching Monk reruns (ion television played Monk on Saturdays back then, and as mentioned, we watch TV shows when the TV station people tell us to watch TV shows). So I raked the leaves while they watched their show. Then I came in and asked how they liked it (since I had warmed up to the idea, I had decided that if they liked it, I would try it next week now that the waters had been tested and everything). They liked it. So the next week, I watched whatever episode the TV gods deigned to air that day.

And from that point on until today and probably tomorrow and the day after that, I was/am/will be utterly consumed by that TV show.

One of the main characters from the show is called Zap Monogan. He was created with human and insect DNA mixed together, and in one episode they referenced him making cocoons or chrysalises in his sleep or something. I was thinking about that and got really confused because I realized that I really knew jack squat about chrysalises. I knew cocoons were silk, but I realized I had absolutely positively no idea what they were made of. So I asked Talia and she didn’t know either.

So I went to Wikipedia to research chrysalises. I found out that chrysalises are made out of the outer skin of the creature inside. This confused me as to how Zap could possibly use a chrysalis, since he’s basically a human with mammal skin and stuff. Then eventually I found out that Zap makes cocoons, not chrysalises. So I researched cocoons and I found out that the chemical that silkworms melt the silk with when they escape from a cocoon is called cocoonase. Obviously, the next question was to find out as much about cocoonase and the glands that produce silk as possible. So I madly searched on Wikipedia, but it turns out that most people don’t care about conoonase or really entomology in general, so there isn’t exactly as much information on cocoon formation as there is about, say, human physiology. Priorities.

I never actually found that much information about cocoons (I sort of gave up. Sorry.) but I eventually found out about a guy named Pierre André Latreille. This dude was a famous French entomologist during the 18th and 19th century, in fact, he was nicknamed The Prince of Entomologists, so it’s no surprise I eventually stumbled upon him.

He was born in France in 1762, and not into the best family situation. There are no surviving records of his mother’s identity, and his father wanted nothing to do with him, although he did send his kid money. As a young man, Latreille became a priest. Latreille never actually carried out any of his priestly duties. He was too busy chasing bugs.

In 1790, the revolutionaries had decided that all priests were required to take an oath promising to adhere to the Civil Constitution of the Clergy. Latreille ended up missing the deadline to accept the oath and was thrown in prison.

Then one day, the prison physician found Latreille literally crawling around on the prison floor chasing a beetle like an insane person. Latreille eagerly told the doctor what he was so excited about. The doctor, to his credit, actually was impressed. You see, we aren’t talking about some run of the mill Coccinella septempunctata here. This was a Necrobia ruficollis—a very rare beetle. Once Latreille explained this, the doctor took the specimen and brought it to a local naturalist, Bory de Saint Vincent, who was a fan of Latreille’s and managed to pull a few strings and get Latreille released from prison. This is especially bizarre when we note that Saint Vincent was only fifteen when all this was happening, and yet somehow a fifteen-year-old could decide who lived and who died. Apparently, the Get Out of Jail Free card came with a plus one, because Damkaer reveals that one of Latreille’s cellmates was freed as well. All the others were killed.

Wow, I thought. That’s ridiculously cool! So I started researching entomologists a lot. I made a weird color-coded chart detailing which French entomologists of the 1800s were friends with each other. It was dorky. Very, very dorky.

Then I started a tumblr, and I was like, and entomologist is a person who studies insects, and I’m a person who studies people who study insects, so I’m an entomologistologist.

See, I warned you that would be long.

Do you get asks regularly: I have never in my entire life gotten an ask. SOMEONE ASK ME SOMETHING PLS. I've been tagged in posts before, though.

Hogwarts house: what I AM is probably Ravenclaw. What I'd WANT to be is Gryffindor.

Patronus: ummm a moth maybe. I haven't really thought about it.

Pokemon team: I only play on Pokemonshowdown.com using gen1 random battles, so I'll take this as a chance to list six random Pokemon that I like: Umbreon, Raichu, Nidorino (male), Mew, Ninetales, and Arcanine.

Favourite colour: Pinkish lavender.

Favourite characters: Zap Monogan from the show Dex Hamilton Alien Entomologist. Zap Zap Zap Zap Zap Zap Zap I love you, Zap. Other favorite characters include Dex himself, Jenny 10 and Tung from the same show, Jughead from Archie comics, Peter Parker, Clark Kent, Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson, Twilight Sparkle and Spike from MLP, Adrian Monk from Monk, and Holden Caulfield from Catcher in the Rye.

Hobbies/crafts: Writing, listening to the radio, and speech and debate.

Collect anything? Pennies. I sorted them by decade but then I jumped and jostled the room enough that they all fell over. But the point of collecting them is to sort them by year, so I should get around to reorganizing them, soon.

Current challenges you face: I need to pray more. So much more. And I need to learn that my friends don't secretly hate me.

Things you’re looking forward to? My next speech and debate tournaments, buying my sister Mariah birthday presents, buying the hardcover of The Lost Girl of Astor Street by Stephanie Morrill, and going to sleep for a nice long time.

Anything you want to promote? Seek God.

I’m tagging @storymaker-the-christian-echidna and @nightcrawler-fan.

#you thought yours was long strawberry #I can't believe I spent over 1100 words describing choosing my url #I'm so sorry #if anyone at all actually read that--even just one person--I'd be shocked

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