#bitch if a fictional ship makes your stomach turn and it's that bad you need literal HELP. OFF the internet
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Imagine...finding out there’s fanfic written about you--and even Charlie ships you with Dean
CarryOnCap’s Masterlist
Warnings: Fluff? Crack? A dramatic fanfic within a fanfic that I got carried away with haha.
A/N: This is kind of ridiculous, but I had fun with it! Also, I’ve never actually seen GoT but it seemed like a reasonable reference from what I’ve heard about it.
“Hey, look who I found!” Sam’s voice echoed through the War Room.
Dean glanced at you from across the table in the library, sharing your surprised expression as you both pushed your chairs away and stood.
“‘Sup, bitches?” Charlie grinned, making her way up the steps toward you.
“Hey! We were expecting you guys to come in through the main door. We’ve been keeping an ear out.”
Charlie stepped into your outstretched arms and pulled you into a tight hug. “It was a spur of the moment decision, but I decided to stick around a day or two longer than planned! Sam said I could go ahead and park in the garage.”
She let go of you and turned to give Dean a hug too. He smiled softly with a look that was uniquely reserved for her, cradling the back of her head while she pressed her cheek against his.
“Good to see you, Charlie. You know you’re always welcome to stay as long as you want.”
An involuntary smile crept onto your face as you watched them. You couldn’t help the way your heart swelled at the low rumble in his voice when he said her name. There was an undeniable protectiveness in his tone when he spoke to her--the sister he’d never wanted, as he affectionately called her.
When you shifted your attention to her, you noticed she was watching you. Before you could decipher the knowing glint in her eye, she suddenly twisted out of his arms and glanced back and forth between you and Dean. She began swinging her arms awkwardly before opting to cross them over her chest.
“You okay?” Dean asked, furrowing his brow.
“Yeah! Of course...Totes chill...cooler than a pack of peppermints.” She bobbed her head and flashed a nervous smile, twisting her hair around her finger as she struggled to act nonchalant. “It’s just that I remembered something. A story I read a while back--completely random. Totally unrelated to anything--I mean, now I’m starting to ramble. Hah! So how’ve you guys been? Still saving the world from evil sons-of-bitches?”
“Uh, yeah…” Sam answered, scrunching his eyebrows together. “We stay busy.”
“So what’s on the agenda tonight?” you piped up, changing the subject.
You were hoping to avoid swapping monster stories for a night. Charlie typically assumed the role of introducing you to popular and noteworthy fandoms during her visits to the bunker and, even if the boys weren’t as vocal, the three of you appreciated her knowledge of all things geeky and nerdy.
“I was thinking Marvel. Y/N, you’re obviously well-versed in the MCU because of your obsession with Steve Rogers--and, you know, clearly you’ve got a thing for the strong, righteous, self-sacrificing hero type. Dean, you could stand to branch out from the Batman references and, Sam, you’ve got this whole Thor kind of vibe going on.”
While Sam and Dean began teasing each other and arguing over “Batman versus Thor,” you gaped at Charlie, wondering what she’d meant by her remark about you having a “type.” You couldn’t help feeling like she was trying to insinuate something, but you shrugged it off and decided maybe it was all in your head.
***
After getting Charlie settled into one of the extra bedrooms, the four of you settled into the Dean Cave and agreed to start with the first Captain America movie.
Last Christmas, you and Sam had teamed up to surprise Dean with a couch for the Dean Cave. He had originally only had two La-Z-boy recliners and you’d found him fast asleep in the stiff old chairs on more than one occasion. Dean had been over the moon about the extra seating and the three of you had rearranged the furniture so the recliners were angled toward the tv on either side of the couch.
“Dibs on this side of the couch!” Charlie said, diving toward the furthest end from the door.
Although it was subtle, you knew there was still something off about the way Charlie studied all of you. There was definitely something on her mind she was trying to keep hidden from all of you.
“You know, we should probably have some snacks,” you said slowly. “Charlie, you want to come help me grab some stuff from the kitchen?”
“But I’m already comfy in my spot.” She frowned, wiggling her hips to make a point of sinking deeper into the spot she’d claimed on the couch. “Why don’t you have Dean help you?”
When you narrowed your eyes suspiciously, Sam cleared his throat. “Dean, why don’t I help you grab some snacks while Y/N and Charlie...catch up, er, whatever…”
You heard the boys leave the room and waited until their footsteps faded down the hall before you started interrogating her.
“Alright, Charlie--what the hell is going on with you?”
“I don’t know what you're talking about,” she muttered, scrolling through her phone.
“Bull. We lie for a living and I know there’s something you’re not telling us. So spill.”
“Fine,” she sighed. “Okay, so remember the Supernatural books by Carver Edlund?”
“Yeah…”
“The series obviously kind of had a cult following when it was in print, right? Well ever since the unpublished works got uploaded, the following has really taken off. Every once in a while a new one still pops up and the fans love them. And you’re in them now too!”
“I’m...what?”
“I mean it’s just insane and totally got sucked into it too. It’s brought on this whole new wave of fanfiction--”
“What’s fanfiction?” you cut in, struggling to keep up.
“It’s fiction made by the fans about the series. Sometimes they put themselves in the stories and write about working cases and fighting monsters with you guys--”
“Why would anyone want to pretend to do this crap with their lives?”
She stared at you for a moment and frowned. “Because you guys are heroes. I mean, yeah, there’s the whole depressing side of monsters and death and trauma and world-ending apocalypses--but you guys save people. You go on these exciting adventures of good versus evil and a lot of times you win. You save people. The fans really look up to all of you.”
Your gaze fell to the floor as you let her words sink in, but she didn’t give you long before she was rambling again.
“But that’s not even the best part! Everyone ships different OTPs--” she paused, noticing your puzzled expression “--uh, one true pairing… So everyone has a favorite couple they think are soulmates and belong together. There’s stories about Sam with Eileen or Jess, Dean with different people--you get the gist. Sometimes they even make up characters or do these ‘reader inserts’ and imagine themselves with the boys or you but, hands down, everyone’s favorite couple they want to end up together is you and Dean.”
“...what?”
Your eyes grew wide. It was hard enough to wrap your mind around the fact that strangers who didn’t know you were a real person were reading about your life, but learning they imagined you in different relationships? You’d never admit it out loud, but had it bad for Dean. And hearing you weren’t the only one that wanted the two of you together...
“I’ve gone deep into the fic and I can’t believe I didn’t see it sooner!” Charlie shook you from your thoughts. “You and Dean are perfect for each other. For serious. I usually stick to the fluffy stuff because, you know, your entire life is kind of angsty and I don’t like to read about you guys being in pain or, like, dying...again. Although I definitely have to admit I kind of stumbled into some of the smutty stuff and, wow, that was something else.”
You opened your mouth to ask more questions, but she kept rolling.
“Right, you probably don’t know what that means either. Fluff is the cute stuff that gives us all feels, angst is kind of just what it sounds like, and smut is, well...the sexy stuff.”
“You mean people out there in the world write about me and Dean…”
“Going at it like an episode of Game of Thrones? Oh yeah,” she responded, unlocking her phone. “Here. Here’s an example.”
Swallowing audibly, you took a seat next to her on the couch as she extended her phone toward you. Gnawing your bottom lip, you began reading the words on the screen:
Y/N took a deep breath, holding it in briefly before she exhaled and began walking toward Dean’s room. Ever since they returned from the hunt, Dean had hidden himself away in his room--no doubt blaming himself for everything that had gone wrong.
When she arrived at his door, she raised her hand to knock. She hesitated, almost retreating at the thought of him turning her away, but she had to try. She had to get through to him somehow.
She rapped her knuckles on the raw umber barrier and opened the door of Room 11 before he could tell her to go away.
She spotted him leaning over the sink, staring at his reflection in the medicine cabinet on the wall. His jade eyes flickered to where she stood in the doorway, their reflection somewhat distorted by cracks that spiderwebbed from where he had struck the mirror.
Her heart seemed to drop into her stomach as she imagined him lashing out, knowing he punched the mirror because he hated the reflection staring back at him. Knowing he always carried the weight of the world on his shoulders when he didn’t need to.
Y/N carefully shut the door and locked it behind her--the click of the deadbolt deafening in the silence. Her eyes never left Dean, who refused to turn and face her. She inched toward him, closing the distance until she could reach out and touch him. Gently placing her hand on his shoulder, she guided him to turn away from the mirror. Still, he refused to meet her eyes.
“Dean…” she breathed, voice barely above a whisper as she cupped his face in her hands. “It’s not your fault.”
He squeezed his eyes closed, face contorting with grief and guilt. The ghosts of his past refused to let him go, but she was determined to make him believe that he was worthy, no matter the cost.
Curling a finger beneath his chin, she tilted his head up, waiting patiently for him to meet her gaze. When his dark green orbs finally met hers, she was surprised to see that they were full of longing and desire. They flickered to her lips, making her breath tremble under the intensity of his gaze. Time seemed to slow until it froze altogether.
Anticipation hung heavy in the air as they both struggled against their desire to maintain the friendship they’d always had and the desperate need to finally cross that line. To succumb to the magnetic pull that had always been evident between the two of them.
Dean swallowed thickly before suddenly rushing forward, crashing his lips to Y/N’s as he pulled her into a searing kiss. He wrapped his strong arms around her, trapping her to his chest, afraid it was all a dream and she would soon disappear. But she gladly melted into his embrace, feeling like she was finally returning home, to a place she’d spent her life searching for.
A moan slipped past her lips as he walked her backward, pressing her up against the wall. She gasped, feeling his--
“The snacks have arrived!”
You jumped in surprise, a small gasp of surprise escaping as the boys appeared with armloads of snacks. Confusion and worry painted Dean’s face as he surveyed your flustered expression. Between his scrutinizing gaze and the content you’d practically been caught reading, your cheeks grew warm.
“Did I miss something?” Dean asked.
“Nope,” you responded much too quickly.
Charlie’s phone had fallen into your lap and, when she began cackling, you whipped your head in her direction and flung the phone at her thigh. You grimaced and the two of you had your own silent conversation as the boys spread the food across the bar Dean had built on the far wall.
“I was just telling Y/N how pumped I am about seeing my favorite OTP tonight,” she giggled.
“Your...what?”
Dean’s arm brushed yours as he plopped down on the other side of you. The accidental contact sent a wave of chills over your skin, making you shudder. You could feel his eyes on you again, but you refused to look at him.
“Oh, I’m so going down with this ship,” Charlie whispered under her breath before continuing in a louder voice. “Nothing--nevermind! Don’t mind me, just thinking out loud...”
“It says here an OTP means...one true pairing?” Your eyes grew wide as you looked to where Sam was reading his phone from where he sat in one of the recliners. “So, uh, ‘in the fandom realm, OTP refers to the coupling of characters--usually from the sci-fi or fantasy genres--by fans who think they make a great romantic duo and envision their lives together and share their imaginings with other fans.’”*
Charlie doubled over, beside herself with laughter. With your lips pressed into a firm line, you glanced at the boys to gauge their reactions. You knew there was no way they could possibly know what you and Charlie had been talking about, but that didn’t stop you from worrying about what Dean might think if he ever found out about the feelings you harbored for him.
“So...you’re looking forward to Cap and his girl in the movie? I’m so freaking confused,” Dean grumbled.
“Yeah…” Sam agreed, making his way to the tv. “I’m just, uh...I’m gonna start the movie now.”
“Good idea.” Charlie peered at you out of the corner of her eye. “Plenty of time to read and talk about all those ships later.”
Although you glared at her, trying to hide your amusement, nothing could deter the smug smile etched upon her face. As Sam turned the lights off and you settled in for another relaxing night with your favorite people, one thing was certain:
You were definitely going to have to take another look at that fanfiction.
CarryOnCap Crew (Forevers):
@abswritesfandoms @amanda-teaches @cosicas-cuquis @crist1216 @droidyouseek @emoryhemsworth @ericaprice2008 @flawless-disaster @janeyboo @jenn0755 @ksgeekgirl @maresmiley @memyselfandmaddox @notyourtypicalrose @randomparanoid @rynabarnesrogers @sandlee44 @scarletsoldierrr @shann-the-artist-moon @sheerioasteroidpanda @shynara51 @someday-when-you-leave-me @star-spangled-man-with-a-plan @thisismysecrethappyplace @torntaltos @waywardbaby @waywardrose13 @weebid @whimsicalrobots @wintersoldierbaby @wintersoldierissucharide @yesfanficsaremylife
Cap’s SPN Crew:
@adoptdontshoppets @akshi8278 @alexwinchester23 @chevyharvelle @deangirl7695 @dean-winchesters-bacon @fandomoniumflurry @pisces-cutie @supernaturalenchanted @superromijn @waywardnerd67 @x-waywardaf-x
#supernatural imagine#spn imagine#dean winchester imagine#supernatural reader insert#spn reader insert#dean winchester x reader#dean winchester x you#dean winchester x y/n#dean winchester fanfiction#dean winchester fic#dean winchester fluff#supernatural fluff#dean x read#dean x y/n
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Ranma 2/4
Part Two: Chapter 13 - 25
Unless someone comes up with a better name I’m sticking with this one
HOW tf is the principal crazier than before?!
Yup, spreading out the Kuno-Principal thing
Is Sasuke seriously an anime-only?!?
Like I said Ryoga needs to chill a little first
Main reason I don’t like Ukyo That scene where she blatantly states she’s fine with turning Ranma into something he’s not rather than helping him
(Ignoring the near constant amount of undermining his abilities)
“I’m gonna cheer him up” as she holds a sword! Why?!
Ranma you dummy, hug Akane!
I hate this demon/ghost cat
Shampoo, you manipulative bitch
Akane learns to swim like a normal person
The lifeguard in me can’t do it
The principal is background shenanigans
Totally forgot about the kid who wants to play video games and is “weak” bc of it
Definitely need to find a different reason tho
Lazy little shits are a pain
Also his mom is crap
Akane… why you be dumb?
Weird Happosai is Santa plot…
What is with the Excalibur meets lucky 1000 meets fairy godmother?
Good news is, with what I’ve done to Kuno’s understanding of Ranma’s curse Ranma knows Kuno wouldn’t give him that wish and calls it quits sooner
Someone just needs to explain Ranma’s really confusing sense of morality to me
Cuz it’s either on 110% or it’s nonexistent, now normally nonexistent is for Kuno but still
Look Ranma’s got ego problems but he ain’t stupid
No betting the Tendo Dojo at five!
On what planet is that a legal document?!?
Some1 tell me why Shampoo using Ranma as a stop ramp bugs me so bad
That mo when you can’t remember if the Hot Spring Challenge is when Ukyo met Shampoo in the anime…
I don’t think so…
Akane you made me need to google a word
That like never happens Ranma you idiot
So close but so far
So much more logic, thanks
I mean more insanity, but it explains why Ranma swapped clothes
Finally! Ranma apologizes
Jesus Christ someone would think I won the goddamn lotto with how loud I cheered when this happened
600% approve of this over what happened in the anime
Oof poor Ranma
Hahahaha in your face Shampoo, but I also think I know why Ranma chose it
Poor Ryoga
I KNEW this guy was coming I still hate it
YEET you can’t PAY ME to do this arc
Look, is it the fact that I had etiquette and dance classes as a child and everyone assumed this is what it was like? Probably.
It wasn’t so I won’t.
Any1 else notice how Nabiki is one of the few ppl that uses she/her when Ranma is in his cursed form no matter what?
Why does this bug me?
Akane, stop beating Ranma up, honestly
This is closer to abuse rather than teasing
*sighs*
Gotta work that out of the narrative, intentional or not
Every1 sayin she’s violent isn’t helping
Like I said really fucking morally GREY Nabiki
How grey can you go before you get black?
Let’s find out together
Can everyone PLEASE stop treating Ranma like an object?!
I literally can’t tell if Nabiki is fucking Aro or not…
STRESS
Why is this so hard?!
I hate seeing Akane cry
I know she’s playing Ranma like a kazoo, but the point still stands
WHY ARE YOU TWO SO DUMB?!
Nope, nevermind it’s just Ranma that’s a fuckin idiot I blame Genma
No, I’m not kidding
*sighs* I don’t condone Nabiki doing this in any way just for the record THAT’S not an apology Ranma!
This mess is totally your fault Nabiki
STRESS
am I intentionally pointing out where this work of fiction is stressing me out since I’m now online schooling and suffering for it? Yes, fuck off.
Actually, don’t.
But Fuck Covid19
Aww his hat’s back!
Why do I love his hat so much?
No, seriously Akane’s so cute!
Oooww tree
y’know the sec she realized what Ranma was doing Nabiki should’ve TOLD him!
Congrats Ranma ya got the wrong sis- I mean the right- but wrong- dammit y’know what I mean
Some1 give me a logical explanation for why Ranma goes on a date with a panda doodle, PLEASE
I do appreciate the epic battle background fight for the anime
Further proof that Happosai sucks
Manga name’s somehow less believable I think it’s the use of “snowman” rather than “yeti”
Did Soun just find out that Pchan is Ryoga, and say nothing?
Ooo, Imma commit arson
Remember when I said obey Physics and Medical, I meant it
Arson is wrong and I know this but “transgender bitch” crosses the line
I will do it
Shampoo is a fucking yandere psycho
Just sayin “we’ll see who can get him first”
honestly, any other group and I’d be annoyed, but these four can’t work together for shit I
’m still pissed at Taro, but he can kill Happosai, please
I can’t tell if Shampoo, Mousse and Ryoga are being purposefully obtuse or not
I just reread their names I know the answer to at least two of them
Idk how I feel about Kuno-amnesia we’ll see
yep, Kuno gives me the creeps w or w/out his memories
kinda wish this was anime
jesus christ, poor Ranma
press f to pay respects for Ranma’s stomach
InstaRegret
Also Ukyo’s assumption that some1 can make Ranma doing anythin he doesn’t want to is crap
Like HELLO! Wake up moron!
Nabiki, I mean this in the nicest way possible, shut the fuck up
You’re making it worse
Also TALK to each other you ding dongs!
OH RIGHT! I almost forgot about the biggest fucking insult that Ukyo said of her own freewill!
It also proves that she doesn’t know Ranma as a person AT ALL!
It’s not a pick one or the other kind of thing
The fact that she thinks Ranma would accept that is insulting
The fact that she thinks that is insulting and makes me hate the patriarchy
Again, treating him like a prize than a person
*tries not scream, sighs*
Nabiki, you’re the cause of at least 30% of the stress I get from this
You having feelings ain’t the fucking problem here Ukyo, you not acknowledging Ranma’s is
I hate fake criers, anyone who does this I hate you
Always let others in on your plans, kids
When’s every1 gonna realize Ranma’s “wishy-washy” cuz no one’s ever committed to HIM before?
This episode confused me, I’m prepared to be MORE confused
Less confused, I’m surprised
Gonsunkugi, you creep
There is SO much wrong with this
*shudders*
WHAT?!
Y’know I didn’t think Gosunkugi could surprise me, I was wrong
Happosai still sucks unfortunately for all of us he’s now weird on top of it
I love how much Ranma needs to be kicked in the teeth to get any character development out of him
Ryoga is my #1 choice for it, always
Ranma… why are you like this?
Genma, emotional range of a goddamn wall
I am jealous of Ranma’s brain
I could be SO mean with the Shishihokodan
Also, are they implying that Ryoga has depression?
Gimme Ranma’s brain
I won’t ask for his confidence cuz that’s impossible but I want his brain
In Akane’s defense, given what she knows she couldn’t’ve known how badly that would affect Ryoga
I ain’t gonna say “leave Shampoo” cuz that’s cruel
I like the “turn into a Cat” rather than the “Can’t Cross” & the use of New Year’s rather than random but this still brings around the fact that she doesn’t LISTEN to him
Mousse you’re NOT helping in fact you’re actively making it worse did you miss when he said blatantly “I don’t wanna”
oh, sure, NOW you’re ok with it
ugh Mousse, you have a brain, I’ve SEEN you use it. Do so now.
This entire episode weirded me out
IDK if it’s the age-dff or the fact that he was makin it up and somehow everyone thought this was okay …
I won’t YEET it but MASSIVELY change
heheheh
Light bulb
NOPE I’m keeping this surprise to myself
it was a rather sweet end tho
Oh, this episode is a mess and a half, honestly
Also Nabiki, congrats you’ve literally enabled a stalker S
o many laws are broken here
okay, so Kodachi not being in on Ranma’s secret after so long makes sense purely because she doesn’t go to their school
however, with what i’ve done to make Kuno marginally less dumb it makes a little bit less sense…
I literally hate Kuno with what I’ve done to his logic of Ranma’s transformation, but that’s the point Kodachi… how do I handle you… oh, duh!
Ok, so Kodachi is now also terrible
I’m trying to figure out where this is in the plot since there is ZERO
Ok, there’s a LINE, Nabiki
This one would be touching, if it didn’t end the way it does
TALK gentlemen!
It won’t kill you
Fuck a parent that says they’re not your parent for no reason, EVER
I am going to make this hurt
Also gonna take out Genma’s fail at stealth
Remember I said Akane’s going to learn to cook
heheheh
sorry, I just love this idea
Oh this is SO against the rules it’s not even funny
tiny adjustment so they actually have quasi-competent referees
Crazy wants crazy?I won’t stop ‘em
I reiterate: CHEATING!
I am aware that the “ending” apparently sets them back to the start in terms of their relationship but I swear to God if they pretend shit like this didn’t happen I will scream
Someone ships something other than Akane x Ranma PLEASE explain why/how
don’t ship bash but I would insight when you explain
STICK TO CANON
please trust me, I’m a multi/poly/crack shipper
(for frame of reference to a bnha I ship DabiHawks)
I understand the appeal of Fanon
however, I would like to stick to Canon here
so no Fanon
Canon Only
Fully love that high kick
Genma shows Ranma’s secret here, but they already know… so… I shall find out
Ooo, you’re not getting out of this Ranma
Do you know how tempting it is for Akane to at least tell Ranma she’s a girl- oh wait gendered sports… right…
Ranma…
if you didn’t realize it was Akane when she hit you for calling her klutzy I can’t help you
I want to commit arson at some of the comments…
but can confirm that these are HS boys
Doesn’t mean I gotta like it
I was wondering how long I was going to have to wait before tearing into Nodoka
FINALLY
Took me WAY too long to remember that Nodoka calling Ranko tomboyish is due to how he speaks in Japanese
I’ll need to figure that out since… English
Can I explode on Genma’s choice to take Ranma at TWO?!
Can I further explode on both of them for making a TWO YEAR OLD “sign” a Seppuku Pledge?!
I hate both of them, honest
ALSO communication!
Genma! Just fucking TELL HIM!
Making her transphobic is SO tempting
I don’t mean in a “i hate you” way I mean in a “I sheltered my whole life” way
It’s still bad, and painful, but she can easily learn from that
Or be worse, this could go 2 ways
I feel so bad for Akane for this entire conversation
Also poor Ranma like ouch…
Awkward
I’m going to make this hurt something fierce
Slight change since I’m hoping Ranma isn’t as “peak fight or flight” by this point
Genma don’t be an asshole for FIVE MINUTES
Please, that’s all I want
If she doesn’t learn the truth before the end I will make a bad decision
Really, I will
Don’t kill Genma, you can’t
Akane, don’t say like you wouldn’t… honestly
Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth, honestly, just look the other way Ranma
*sigh*
Ranma…
See, this kind of crap here is why I really don’t like Cologne
any other day Akane’d be right
oof, that means he self aware that girls flock to him
I’m quite frustrated by that if I’m honest
Ranma is clueless about all the wrong things
I love him but God I wanna punch him sometimes
Why is there a swing from the ceiling?!
I had a jolt from the way they set that panel up, thanks
Are you trying to kill me?!
Thank you Cologne, now fuck off
Oh thank God, at least he learned
This is nonanime stuff so I have no clue what’s happening but anything to make Happosai miserable
I’m enjoying this immensely
ugh, “think of it as a compliment” ghost
Eat me
okay, yeah, as much as I want him dead, that’s worse
I’m glad he’s not a one-and-done character
I will forever ONLY call him Taro when it is NonDialogue
Wait Saffron as in big-bad Saffron?
I literally only know pieces of the end so I’m just pulling from what I know
Lol, wait… was that soldier Anime only too?
I almost liked you there for a sec Taro
Now I’m pissed again
bravo
Oh, YIKES
… if Ranma falls into the Spring of Drowned Twins would he split?
I’m not going to DO IT, obviously!
I’m just curious okay…
that answers that… and kills anyone other than Ranma’s plan to turn back to normal I hope everyone is aware of that
oof
Since when is there a castle on an island in Japan
tis just a scratch, I’ll admit that was funny
Ranma… your stomach gets you in so many problems
ok, that was wholesome
I approve
Okay, so my understanding is that Mrs. Tendo got sick, so I can understand the reactions to Kasumi
BUT I still find it odd because… well… anyone in my house gets sick and you mostly can’t even tell I mean, minus a worse attitude and a mask, other than that though, nope we keep ‘er movin’
I’m moving this section sooner EVEN IF IT KILLS ME!
I like her mom’s cookbook tho
I could make a Ranma x Ryoga joke here, but I won’t
I also won’t make a Ranma x Ryoga joke chapter cuz I’m nice like that
Actually I might have no choice
I’m FINE just dying
Help
my multishipper heart is dying here
I love this
InstaRegret for THREE people
If nothing else, I’m impressed
(well three once Ranma’s back to normal)
I need help
Fangirling/Fanboying/Fanpeopling is dangerous folks, remember that
Poor Ryoga
Though I too feel that right now like where do I look because everything coming in at mach 6
I’m changing that one scene tho cuz I can’t justify the aftermath without it
This… is… weird to say the least
I feel like I should just expect anything with Gosunkugi remotely involved to be weird at this point
okay, not as weird as I expected
glad it was short tho
I think I am officially out of anime terf
YAY, new content!
This is why I ask about any ship that isn’t Ranma x Akane
Also, names?
That- that- that can’t...
I DIDN’T NEED TO KNOW THAT!
EWWW
gross
WHY?!?!!
also, biology, that’s not how that works!!
You two ARE idiots
Ryoga you die I’ll kill you
Well… that hurt to see so quick…
Ranma, get up!
I officially hate this Herb guy
ok, so if you put HOT water in the ladle do you stay that way forever?
Alright! Way to go Ryoga!
I need to stop shipping Rivals it’s bad for my health
fucking eat it you dick!
Poor Akane
nevermind, Ranma you idiot
awwwww
ok, so that whole no more Anime-content… I was wrong, and I admit that, but still
I’m just thinking of my bff when they realize she’s an adult cuz, yeah, she’s like that too
except like physically an adult unlike tiny-Hinako
oh MY GOD Ukyo you’re driving me up the goddamn wall I swear!
THANK YOU AKANE!
“You’re all Ranma’s fiancées” when only one of them actually is
GIANT SIGH OF ANNOYANCE
Ranma, learn to communicate, PLEASE!
Okay… so is this where they figured it out or are some ppl still in the dark?
TIMELINE!!
Honestly, mood Ranma, mood
This entire plot line confuses me if I’m being totally honest
I mean I live for the Akane focus, but there are so many better ways to do this
#ranma ½#ranma 1/2#ranma saotome#ranma#akane tendo#nabiki tendo#kasumi tendo#soun tendo#genma saotome#nodoka saotome#tatewaki kuno#kodachi kuno#full series au#bc I know no restraint#I'm doing this to distract from stress shut up#don't judge me#COVID19 binge watch
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GET TO KNOW THE BLOGGER!
Tagged by: my lover @hammurabicomplex
I’m tagging: anyone and everyone who wants to pick this one up! share with the class if you feel like it! tag me in it!!
PRESENTING. RANDOM DEEP DIVE WITH INDIGO-MUN AT 2AM ;
FIRST NAME
Good fucking question… It’s (sort-of) currently Dylann! I was Kieran before that, though; it’s still used as one of my first names and I’m not used to Dylann quite yet bc I’ve just started using it.
Indigo is one of my middle names though, and I’ve used it as an online handle elsewhere forever so I use it here now! [ Fun etymology facts: Dylan(n) is a mythology name generally meaning “born of the wave” (aspiring diver & a water witch at heart). Kieran means “little dark one” bc of my love for horror, && I chose Indigo bc as a kid to be it was neither boy (blue) or purple (girl) and was both and neither as well as my absolute favorite color as this vibrant ass mystical color. ]
STRANGE FACT ABOUT YOURSELF
hmmmmm…. I’m a horror lover at heart, so as a child (I wanna say 12), I was walking through an antique store (I have a few cool finds, I considered putting my other one as the fact tbh) and I turned the corner and I saw these two dolls staring back at me at the foot of the stairs of this antique building. my blood froze, and i felt my stomach drop. i got actual, physical goosebumps stumbling across these two creepy dolls staring back at me in the corner, and i couldn’t leave the store without them. perhaps the little painted porcelain boy would be somewhat spooky by himself if it wasn’t for the terrifying lidded gaze of the porcelain girl with the hairline fractures and slightly open lips. i cant look at her. i dont really find dolls scary, I like to find the spookier ones ones, and she makes me paranoid as hell. i keep her face covered and her up in my closet except for when i bring her out to show her off proudly as the spookiest thing I have but……. i dont really collect dolls anymore. even thinking about her brings a fearful tear to my eye. i don’t like to think about her for very long, but that’s why I’m so fucking proud to own her.
( YES — I’m THAT white person in the horror film )
TOP THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU FIND ATTRACTIVE ON A PERSON
hhhhh a beardy jawline, high cheekbones, crooked canine teeth >:3c
A FOOD YOU COULD EAT FOREVER AND NOT GET BORED OF
b.l.t.’s with avocado. ahhhh. my mouth is watering just thinking about it, oh my god. just a bit of salt and pepper???
A FOOD YOU HATE
barbecue anything, i hate the taste of bbq sauce, you keep your nasty black goo to yourselves at the grill. twice in my life i have presented with barbecue pizza and both times i cried literal tears. why would you do such a horrible thing to a person? what kind of a monster are you? how do you sleep at night?!
GUILTY PLEASURE
the sims. constantly. always. i’ve sunk thousands of hours into my households. oh also uhhhhhh i run two 80s horror blogs, one being a shitpost blog with occasional art of mine and one gremlin fanfic ship blog for horrible, terrible self indulgent fanfics i’ll get the courage to finish writing & post so i can be cancelled on tumblr for at some point. NO, i won’t link them. as i pretend they’re even all that hard to find, within a day i was found on both by someone i admire here a lot :’) ilu bby thnk u eternally for supporting ur local horrifying dumbass wtf
WHAT DO YOU SLEEP IN
the same clothes i’ve been wearing all day usually, my sweats & long sleeve raglans or my hoodies. i like being cozy day & and out. and ugh. efoort. just throw me in a blanket in a cool room and im out.
SERIOUS RELATIONSHIPS OR FLINGS
serious relationships with some openness or poly. i wish i could fling! just not exactly easy for demisexual autistics lmao.
IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN THE PAST AND CHANGE ONE THING ABOUT YOUR LIFE, WOULD YOU AND WHAT WOULD IT BE
I think I would be adopted by my grandma as a kid. It would save me some trauma but mostly I think it would get my autism diagnosed way earlier and save me angsting all these years of wondering why & thinking it’s my fault I’m struggling so much and so loud and affectionate and different in a world that i didnt fit in the same way.
ARE YOU AN AFFECTIONATE PERSON
when i get drunk i text people how much they mean to me in my life. does that answer your question? ahhh. i’m sometimes a cuddle monster with friends, i message people with long texts about how much they mean to me, but I sometimes really don’t like to be touched at all.
A MOVIE YOU COULD WATCH OVER AND OVER AGAIN
FLYPAPER. F L Y P A P E R. FLYPAPER. FLY, and, I can’t stress this enough, fucking PAPER. ( Though also Whole Nine Yards and both Re-Animator & Bride ). I have watched Flypaper already like, 5 times this week and I’m still not done, and the other movies have been on repeat for days in this household within the last year. In the past it has also been Donnie Darko & the new Nightmare on Elm Street. roast me.
FAVORITE BOOK
White Fang by Jack London. Have I actually ever finished it? No. Do I still own a copy I’ve had since childhood thru multiple dogs eating it, taking it to and from school, and highlighting and circling all the best parts of chapter one ever since I was a kid and it was too hard of a book for me to read? You bet your ass. If I ever need inspiration I just reread chapter 1. Although one of my other favorites was Broken Monsters by Lauren Beukes. But White Fang is like, a weirdly personal text. We stan London’s writing in this household.
YOU HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO KEEP ANY ANIMAL AS A PET, WHAT DO YOU CHOOSE
FENNEC FOX!! I used to daydream about having my own named Shiloh when I was a lil kid. they’re adorable little things and i am obsessed. i mean, gimme any fox and im happy, marble foxes, red foxes… but I was obsessed with fennec foxes. Also tbh ferrets. I want a ferret.
TOP FIVE FICTIONAL SHIPS [IF YOU ARE AN RP BLOG, YOU CAN USE YOUR OWN SHIPS AS WELL]
Rosa & @ninetyscnds‘s Luke, Rosa & @iimpulsivity is already screaming my name, Rosa & Constantine, Jesse & Andrea from Breaking Bad, and the joker and harley of 80s sci-fi Dan & Herbert from Re-Ani. I am but a simple opossum.
PIE OR CAKE
Pie! I’ll take both pumpkin & melty apple over cake. also, cheesecake is more pie than cake soooo, pie wins.
FAVORITE SCENT
my dogs / my blanket. :’) It’s the most grounding smell in the world.
CELEBRITY CRUSH
oliver jackson-cohen, i’m fucking GAY and im angry about it. there i was, minding my own business, and i saw that asshole in a certain SHIRTLESS GIF and it AWOKE SOMETHING IN ME. dont talk to me about it, holy shit im obsessed with beardy men now god fuckkdafjaask i hate him why did he make me this gay i was perfectly fine being into girls but NOOOOOO him and his dumb hairy chest and sweet rugged face and I—— I also am obsessed with the archaeologist & television personality Josh Gates and may or may not be considering making a fan blog for him bc idk if my anthropology docuseries host is Dad or Daddy but i love him lots
IF YOU COULD TRAVEL ANYWHERE, WHERE WOULD YOU GO
I would go on a dive with anthropologists and archaeologists doing fieldwork research in the ancient cenotes of the Yucatán Peninsula. My actual dream job, catch me crying & fantasizing about being underwater documenting Mayan skulls given as offerings. Fuckkkk, I love anthropology so much!! take me anywhere in the world to immerse myself into culture & archaeology.
INTROVERT OR EXTROVERT
Introvert. I have a real life friend I see roughly once a month, and that’s it. Plenty of online relationships, I’m chatty, message me all day every day. but i dont do people well.
DO YOU SCARE EASILY
I used to! Really bad. I don’t as much anymore. I do get paranoia a lot still. Having therapists telling you that the FBI could be outside your house watching you through your windows will kind of nervous. ( no google results for: yes hello fbi i am a writer please dont put me on watchlists i just have research i need to do for this idea im working on, would you like to try again? ) I have nightmares nightly but not they never make me afraid, they just make me feel like crap. jumpscares and loud noises and seeing people reaching into their pockets dont set off as many brain alarms anymore tho!! progress haha.
IPHONE OR ANDROID
I like my android better bc of capabilities but meh
DO YOU PLAY ANY VIDEO GAMES
My mom, her husband & I play COD for family game night, and Silent Hill is my life’s blood. I’ve sunken hours into Sims & Skyrim, and Norman Jayden from Heavy Rain is my #1 fictional character in existence, why do i love the druggie babies
DREAM JOB
Oh… You’re asking me to pick? I’d love to be an anthropologist doing work out in the field. Underwater archaeology is peak, but I’m also heavily considering being a body recovery diver or police diver. I’d love to see myself in uniform someday, if possible. Just the thought makes me teary eyed & proud.
WHAT WOULD YOU DO WITH A MILLION DOLLARS
fund my person creative & educational endeavors. get myself a spooky ass abandoned house to make my own home to create in, and travel to the world’s best dive sites. just live a mild life of education, creation & exploration. that’s the dream TM.
FICTIONAL CHARACTER YOU HATE
dr. hill is a gross and whiny lil bitch this post brought to u by the miskatonic crew, how is everyone here an even worse bad guy than herbert west precious dan excluded talk shit get hit
tho john winchester from spn and both walter white & todd from breaking bad are all in my crew of hated characters. i jusT… the reani novel is difficult to read because i have to deal with this old sack of shit.
FANDOM THAT YOU WERE ONCE A PART OF BUT AREN’T ANY LONGER
Supernatural :-)
… AND THIS CONCLUDES A DEEP DIVE WITH INDIGO!! //
#||: && the mundane ( ooc );#( get to know a bitch!! )#( this was... a lot of me rambling about weirdly personal shit at 2 am )
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What Have You Done?
(Alternatively... “More Rocks? Shit!”)
Matt Murdock (Daredevil) One-Shot (With Dex cameo)
A/N: This is a follow up to “Who the F@&$ Throws Rocks?” and “Who Else Throws Rocks?” Both of which can be found in the Daredevil post from my Masterlist linked on my bio. Truly, I wasn’t expecting this arc to take this turn (or to continue this arc), and I apologize for breaking the title pattern but I just couldn’t throw a silly title on this one. It’s grim. But, it all came about because I was very, VERY angry over some crazy stuff that blew up at work this last week so when I sat down, this is what came out.
When you finally get your shot at the trafficker, you take it, much to Matt’s horror. But you realize too late that it may have been a mistake.
Warnings: VERY GRAPHIC VIOLENCE AND GORE immediately under the cut. Bad language too, for good measure. I’m serious. Be warned. Also I guess S2 spoilers.
(And I know I wrote his face covered so this gif doesn’t quite match but...)
There was a sense of serenity to the moment as you lifted your blade to deliver the killing blow. Time seemed to slow as if you let you enjoy the feeling.
But it was suddenly cut short when something smashed into your hand.
Cursing, you could feel the instantaneous bruising on your fingers as your knife was sent flying. Before you could recover, a dark figure burst from the shadows and roughly forced you back. A man in all black scooped up his weighted baton and stood between you and your prize. Even with his covered face, you knew him.
Matt.
“What did you do??”
You didn't need to reply – he knew. And not even the look of horror on Matt's face could fill you with any sense of remorse for your actions.
Blood was still dripping off the edge of your blade, dotting a smudge at your feet. But it was nothing compared to what was draining from the trafficker's body. Even in the dark, with Matt forcing distance between you and him, you could see the dark, pooling blood. The sharp scent of copper filled the air; Matt had to know it was bad.
It brought you a grim sense of satisfaction. If he bled out slowly, it would suit you just fine. Everything else happened slowly to that human piece of trash. You took your time. Feeling your blade slide into his flesh was both exciting and a relief. It needed to happen. He needed to die.
His stunned scream filled your ears and all you could do was smirk as you drove your knife higher inside his gut. As he flailed uselessly, you easily dodged each swing, not letting up on the pressure until your blade was buried to the hilt. Your hand grew slick as his warm blood spilled out and down his shirt.
Slowly, his movements grew sluggish, his hand resting on your shoulder as he slumped forward. Sidestepping him, you let the scum collapse to the ground as you ripped your knife from his belly. The wet, sucking sound would be forever burned into your brain. And you didn't mind at all.
Matt's chest heaved as he tried to catch his breath.
“What are you even doing here?” Your voice was surprisingly steady.
Between pants, his tongue darted out over his lips. “What do you think? He-he's still alive. We have to get an ambulance here, quickly!”
“No. You have to get out of my way. I'm finishing this.”
Putting a hand out towards you, he shook his head. “I can't let you do that. This isn't right.”
“Right? What's not right is how this shit stain can tear women and children...children... from their families and sell them into a life of rape and abuse where their only chance at freedom is to die.”
Matt's lips drew together in a tight line as his breath grew more even.
“And then he weasels his way through the system without so much as a slap on the fucking wrist for it! What do you think’ll happen if he gets saved now? Nothing! They'll patch him up and send him on his way because of whatever the hell deal he worked with the Feds.” You didn't care that your voice rose. If some idiot wanted to come down to this abandoned parking lot to intervene...let them.
“He gave them names. I know...I know that doesn't feel like enough, but most of the trafficking ring was dismantled virtually overnight. He's a horrible human being, who did some good to save his skin, but it's not up to us to decide his fate,” Matt said with the passionate conviction that drew you to him in the first place. But not now. Not for this.
“Yeah! And he even gave enough information to track back to some of the victims. But people were shipped out of the country. We can't help them and the FBI can't do shit. They're gone. Don't you get that? And do you honestly think he gave all his contacts? Do you believe for a hot second he doesn't have a backup plan in place? Because I did some digging and trust me, he does."
Huffing through his nose, Matt tilted his head, suddenly getting desperate. “We have to hurry! Don't you get it? It's not about him it's about yo-”
“The fuck it's not! It's absolutely about him. What? Are you scared I'm going to spend eternity in your Catholic hell for killing this asshole? Then fine! That's what'll happen. I'll burn in hell, being stabbed with pitchforks until the end of time with a goddam smile on my face because I'll know I stopped another innocent soul from falling victim to this monster.”
“Y/n, please, please, don't do this. I...I can't follow you down this path.” His voice wavered so drastically, you wondered if he was close to breaking down.
You felt a twinge of guilt. Which made you almost as angry as you were that he was still in your way.
“No one's asking you to,” you growled.
Before he could reply, a spray of pebbles scattered across the pavement between you.
Rocks? Shit.
You both spun towards the side entrance of the lot but it was Matt who caught a baton square in the chest. You could hear the breath forced from his lungs as a second baton nailed him in the head, knocking him back.
Out of your way.
“Take your shot.”
Without a second thought, you grabbed a small dagger from your hip strap and snapped your wrist. The blade sunk straight into the trafficker's temple.
“No!” Matt shouted as hopped to his feet, but the fight was immediately drained from him. Already low to the ground, he sunk to his knees.
It was done.
Looking over, you saw the fake Daredevil in Matt's old, red costume. Your stomach dropped.
A smirk grew, complimenting his perfectly chiselled chin. “Nice work.”
For the first time all night, doubts crept in. Why was he here?
“Don't worry. My boss was done with him,” the Daredevil assured you as though he could read your mind.
“What did you do?” Matt's lips were twisted into a deep frown and you were grateful you couldn't see his eyes.
The grin dropped from the Daredevil's face as he briefly turned Matt's direction. Keeping a wary eye on him, he crouched low enough to grab the batons that rolled along the pavement. His cautiousness was a wasted effort as Matt made no move to stand.
He was already defeated.
The Daredevil straightened and shook his head. "Don't listen to him, Y/n. He just doesn't understand."
You froze. He knew your name. Had he been close enough to hear Matt or did he already know it?
Swallowing, you stayed quiet, but a hand dropped to another blade in your belt.
Chuckling, the Daredevil tilted his head. “Hey now. That's no way to treat a friend. I'm just here to make sure you received your gift.”
“My...gift?” Your heart was hammering so hard in your chest, it was impossible to think straight.
The Daredevil nodded towards the body as Matt seemed to follow the gesture, also turning his head toward the trafficker.
“You son of a bitch,” Matt spat, shifting his weight.
“Stay out of this, asshole. I'm not here for you. Though, if I'm being honest, I'd love for you to give me an excuse-”
“That's bullshit. No one gave me this. I found him, I did this on my own.” The previous steadiness to your voice was gone, and it was all you could do to keep it from cracking.
“You sure about that?”
Your gaze dropped as his words sunk in. The last time you saw him, he was stopping you from killing this guy and this time...
His dark grin made your stomach churn. “My boss isn't trying to put you in his debt. He hates scum like this too and now that he no longer needs him, he wanted to do what was right.”
“Right?” Matt's breathed the question out in a rough exhale.
Ignoring him, the Daredevil finished. “He merely hopes you’ll realize that letting you do the honours was a gesture of good faith.”
“Good faith? Faith in what?” You could feel a noose tightening.
Grinning, he started backing away towards the entrance he came in. Bowing his head, he added, “I'll be in touch.”
“Y/n...what have you done?”
Paralyzed, you watched the Daredevil fade into the shadow as Matt's pained voice violently knotted your insides.
What have you done?
Taglist: @foreverfaeries @flower-two @getlostinyourparadise @selfishkiddo @angelicshinigami @natsukitakama @legion-18 @fiction-is-the-new-reality @jobean12-blog @fiction-is-the-new-reality
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Back Seat - Mr. Wolf (Pulp Fiction) x Reader [Smut]
Synopsis: After two hitmen pick you up from the scene of a now double homicide, you're mixed up in the cleaning of their car when your former business associate is shot by accident. The Cleaner takes an interest in you.
@this-is-mysuperwholockd-design Harveyyyy😍
"Oh man, I shot Marvin in the face!"
"WHY THE FUCK'D YOU DO THAT?!"
"Aw, I didn't mean to, it was an accident!"
You sit in the back, shocked. The pieces of brain somehow mostly missed you, but you've still got blood on your denim shorts and tank top.
The hitman with the long hair just shot your business associate, Marvin. You had been working with him and two other guys on a job regarding a briefcase for Marsellus Wallace. It had been your idea to keep the briefcase. All the other guys had been too chicken shit, so you told them you'd take the case and run if they didn't agree to it. Ultimately, it was basically your fault they were killed for it, but you don't like to cry over spilled milk. Or spilled brains.
You and the two other men pull up to a suburban house, green lawn cut nicely and picket fence painted white. You frown out the window as you pull into the garage. What the fuck were you doing in a place like this? Kissing one of their wives goodbye before shipping off to jail?!
"Get out the car," Jules snaps at you, jerking the door open. He's still pissed about what you did to his boss. Vincent offers you a hand as you step out, and the two men escort you inside the picture perfect house, looking over their shoulders the whole time.
A guy with messy hair in a checkered bathrobe comes breezing out of the living room, swinging the door open.
"Get in, get in," he mutters, closing it after you three. He stands back, and sighs. "Who the fuck is she, man?"
"Very close to ending up like that dead son of a bitch in the car," Jules warns, and you cross your arms.
"I said I'd let Marsellus deal with me himself, what more do you want, assholes?"
Vincent huffs. "Hey Jimmy, where's the Cleaner?"
Mr. Winston Wolf arrives at the door precisely on time. He introduces himself, and comes in. You look him up and down. He's dressed in a suit that fits him well, and has his hair slicked back, with a crisp mustache above his top lip and a sexy squint.
"I'm Winston Wolf. I solve problems."
Your lips quirk up. Just your type-- a daddy who knows what he's doing.
Jules and Vincent shake his hand, and then he parts them to look at you.
"And who is this young lady here?"
The man in the suit's eyes roam to meet yours, and he offers a polite smile. You hold your smirk. No, he's definitely not like the other imbeciles in this room.
"This bitch is one of them motherfuckers who was tryna fuck Marsellus Wallace," Jules steps in, scowling.
Wolf's eyebrows raise at you. "You tried to fuck Marsellus Wallace?"
"Not in the literal sense," Vincent mutters, rubbing his temples.
Wolf just chuckles, and slaps the two men on the back. "Well. Show me to the car, fellas."
You all walk to Jimmy's garage, the neurotic host fidgeting away. It takes about 40 minutes for Jules and Vincent to get their shit together and finish cleaning the car, and at that point, it's about five minutes away from being sparkling clean.
"Hey, um..." Jimmy clears his throat, "I hate to be that fucking guy, but Bonnie's on her way home, so you guys have gotta be fast."
"Jimmy," Wolf says calmly, putting both hands on his shoulders, "Everything is, and will be, under control. Would you get me another cup of coffee while the boys put the blankets in and I chat with the young lady?"
Jimmy nods, taking everyone's mugs, and Wolf comes over to you.
"You must think I'm a big bad gangster, waltzing in here at 8AM in a suit," he laughs quietly. You shake your head.
"You strike me as the opposite, actually."
He smiles, humming. "Well, that's good, sweetheart. That's good. I am a big bad gangster, but it's nice to know I don't frighten young girls off after first impressions." He narrows his eyes. "You never told me your name."
"(y/n)." You grin. "I'm a big bad gangster too."
"Are you?" he asks playfully. You grin back, just as playfully.
"I just shot four men last night and my landlord over a briefcase and tried to double cross my crime boss with my partners for ten bricks of solid gold."
"You are a big bad gangster," he affirms. You lean against the wall, hooking your thumbs through the belt loops of your short shorts.
"I like your suit," you mention.
"Thanks," he says, smoothing it out, "Speaking of clothing... we've gotta get you out of yours. They're covered in dead guy."
"Marvin," you correct.
"Dead Marvin," he nods. You smirk again.
"Okay. Be my guest... take em off."
He looks over at you, staring at you for a moment. "Okay." He turns, whistling. "Boys! That's enough." He nods to each of them. "Go hose yourselves down in the yard. I'll inspect the car, see what kinda job you did."
The two men skulk off, and Winston opens the car door, gesturing for you to join him. "After you."
You slide in, and he shuts the door, preparing to get in the other side. Just then, the door from the house opens, and Jimmy sets the mugs down. "Hey, hey! Mr. Wolf! Are you... fucking a chick in my garage?!"
"It's fully within the boundary of my timing to do so, Jimmy." He walks over, and leans in. "I help you. You help me help myself."
Jimmy rubs the back of his neck. "Shit... okay, I guess. Just be quick, Bonnie's home in fifteen minutes."
Left alone once more in the domesticated garage, Wolf opens the back door of the car, and gets in, shutting it. You already have your top off, and he admires your breasts held in your bra. He scratches his head.
"You know, you're awfully forward."
"Would you rather I took... my... time?" you ask, teasingly tugging your shorts back up. He takes your hand, stopping you.
"That's one thing we don't have, sweetheart. Time."
He then yanks your shorts down, and turns you over so that your stomach and breasts are pressed to the blankets on the seat. You hear him undo his belt buckle and unzip himself, and bite your lip in excitement. He's still fully clothed in that suit, while you're in your bra with your panties tugged down to your knees-- it gets you so hot thinking about the power he has over you.
"Ready?" he murmurs.
"Mhmm," you moan, and he grunts softly as he goes in from behind, welcomed deep as he pushes into you as far as he can. He lifts your ass higher for a better position, and slaps one of the cheeks as he pulls back and thrusts back into your pussy. His pace leaves no time for adjustment, and you wince, grabbing at the car door to brace yourself for his size.
"I sincerely apologize for my lack of bedroom etiquette, (y/n)," he says softly, pounding in and making you moan, "I'm usually a slow lover, I even light a few candles sometimes if I'm feeling particularly romantic. But for one thing, we're not in a bedroom, and another, the only time we got is for me to fuck you fast, and rough."
You groan, clawing at the blankets. "Wolf...”
“What was that?”
“Mr. Wolf, sir..."
He begins to grunt more, his thrusts coming faster, faster, harder, until both of you gasp and cry out in record time, Wolf pulling out of you just in time to come all over your ass.
Catching your breath, you both wait a second, and then he takes out a handkerchief from his breast pocket, carefully cleaning you up. When he's satisfied with your state, he pats your hip, and you turn around lazily, grinning.
"I thought you were supposed to be cleaning this car... not making a mess of it."
He chuckles, gesturing around. "Do you see a mess, baby girl?"
Getting out of the car, Wolf helps you out and closes the door after you. He then takes out a comb and drags it through his slightly mussed hair a few times, before tucking it away again and knocking on the door to the house thrice. Jimmy comes out, looks you up and down, then looks to Winston.
"Did you take care of what you needed to, Mr. Wolf?"
Wolf smiles at him, slinking an arm around your waist. “I certainly did, Jimmy. Thank you."
Vincent and Jules, dressed in wet shorts and t-shirts now, wait outside for you both. You go out, and stand in front of the hose in your underclothes as Wolf sprays any extra blood off of you with the garden hose. When that's all finished, Jules sticks out a hand.
"Thanks for your help, sir."
"Not a problem," Wolf nods, shaking it. He then looks to you. "As for her..." Everyone turns to look at you standing there shivering in your bra and panties. You roll your eyes.
"We're taking this little kitty to Marcellus, see if she wants to fuck him then," Jules says sternly. Wolf cocks his head.
"No, you're not."
Vincent does a double take, states at Jules with a 'this guy' look, and Jules raises his eyebrows. "Pardon me?"
"You're not taking her to Marcellus Wallace, because she's coming with me, boys. We have unfinished business involving a few scented candles."
"And a bubble bath?" you tease, taking his arm. He smiles a little.
"Sure, baby. And a fucking bubble bath."
"Uh... that lady is nothing but trouble, you know that," Jules says. Wolf smirks, hand feeling down to your ass to snap your panties.
"I've noticed."
As everyone prepares to disembark, you all hear poor Jimmy open the door.
"Hi, Bonnie, honey! There's totally no dead body in there, or anyone who just had sex in our garage!"
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A Dutiful Son -The Chronicles of Varric Tethras
For a while, I was working on a fan fiction chronicling a younger Varric’s life before he met Hawke and give some insight into what I believe shaped him into the Dwarf we all know and love. I’ve gotten distracted with a few projects and so this story is probably going to sit for a while, but I thought I’d post a few roughdrafts of the earlier chapters to see if anyone would even read the full thing someday. Feel free to give feedback!
*Update 3/19/19 - I’ve received enough feedback from people that I’ve decided to continue writing this story. Still deciding whether to just post here on Tumblr or make a Fanfiction.net account.
Varric crashed to the ground in a cloud of dirt and sawdust. The lad blinked away stars as his eye stung from the sucker punch he just received. The clatter of his stool falling with him drew the attention of everyone in the Saucy Maid Tavern, who paused in their drinks to watch the unexpected show. The two sailors he played against looked furious to say the least after the Angel of Death card was played and Varric revealed a winning hand, earning him the rather impressive pile of coins in the middle of the table.
Varric tried to compose himself on the ground as Gael stomped around the table and leaned menacingly over the dwarf.
“You little shit!” Gael growled as his shipmate Elias reached across the table to look at Varric’s fallen hand of cards.
“ You cheated, dwarf!”
Varric scoffed and looked quite wounded at the accusation despite the truth that he had in fact, cheated. Two of the barmaids and the old man in the corner all kept tabs and gave him signals on what his opponents had in hand. But he wasn’t about to own up to that.
“I cheated? where did you get those Serpent cards?”
“The same place you got those Angels. I knew you were cheating!.”
“Oh yeah? How?” the Dwarf challenged as Elias tossed Varric’s cards across the table.
“Because that wasn’t the hand I dealt you!” Gael emphasized with a solid kick to Varric’s stomach, leaving the young Dwarf breathless.
Gasping for air, Varric staggered to his hands and knees, hoping the beer and meat pie from earlier weren’t going to make a reappearance. As he desperately sucked in air, he could see that neither the barmaids nor the old man were going to jump in and help him, but then again he wasn’t paying them to fight for him--only to cheat.
“You Dwarves think you’re so clever, but you’re a damn fool if you think you’re getting a sovereign of our money!”
“In fact,” Elias smirked, pulling out his purse “I think the pot will go to us today.”
Varric balked at the sound of his coin falling into the human’s purse, but consented with a smile as he sat back on his heels..“Seems fair, let it be known a Dwarf keeps his honor when beaten.”
The Tavern patrons chuckled at Varric’s assertion and began returning to their drinks. Varric started to rise to his feet but Gael firmly gripped the Dwarf’s shoulder, keeping him off balance.
“You’re not getting off that easy, Dwarf.”
“How can we be sure you won’t try to cheat our friends out of their money if they come here?” Elias wondered, tightened the strings on his purse with a dramatic flare and tossing it on the table. “I think we need to make sure you remember this little lesson.”
Before Varric could register what the human was implying, Gael grabbed him by the shirt and slammed him onto the table. Elias slowly rose from his chair and drew a long thin knife from his belt, the metal gleaming in the lantern light. The Tavern fell in a hush at the sudden promise of violence.
“Enough of that, serrahs, you leave that lad alone!” The bartender barked from behind the bar, “I won’t have Dwarf blood all over my tables!”
“You stay out of this, old man!” Elias ordered, pointing the knife menacingly at the bartender. “This Lowtown trash needs to learn!”
Gael leaned over Varric, splaying the Dwarf’s arms and holding them down. Varric struggled futilely to free his arms from under the much bigger human as Elias twirled his knife perversely in his hand.
“Tell me, Dwarf” Elias sneered, as he leaned over to look Varric in the eyes “how attached to your nose are you?”
“Very.” Varric snarled, quickly jamming his knee up and hitting Gael firmly in the groin. The human sailor fell to the ground with a groan as Varric took advantage of his free arms to grab a tankard and slam it into Elias’s face. Elias dropped his knife and gave a howl of pain as blood gushed from his nose. Scrambling off the table, Varric snatched the heavy purse and tucked it in his belt as he bolted from the tavern, a chorus of farewells, cheers, and laughter following him. Pausing in the door, Varric gave an elegant bow as the two sailors struggled to recover from their injuries.
“Until the next time, Saucy Maid!”
“There won’t be a next time if you don’t start running laddie!” a patron called out as the humans stumbled towards the door.
Crap.
Varric cringed as he turned and made a break for the streets of Lowtown. Dodging between beggars and jumping over merchant tables, Varric chuckled to himself as he peeked over his shoulders and found the sailors nowhere in sight. Trotting amiably down a set of stairs, his eyes swept the corridor, looking for anything familiar. Varric silently chided himself, realizing that he may have gotten turned around in his heroic fleeing. Spotting a familiar looking door, Varric’s eyes brightened as he suddenly remembered the path to take to get back to Hightown. Taking a left, Varric found himself in a dead end alley.
Grumbling to himself, Varric realized just how lost he was when the sound of boots pounding pavement echoed towards him. Frantically looking for something big enough to hide behind, Varric froze in dread as Gael and Elias stumbled into the alleyway. Panting with a wild look in their eyes, Varric tried to put on a disarming smile as they prowled towards him.
Well, shit.
“Oh, hello boys!”
“Didn’t think you’d see us so soon?” Gael smirked, cracking his knuckles ominously.
“Hoping, would be the better term.” the Dwarf admitted, backing away from them. “You aren’t still sore about what happened back there--”
“You broke my nose!” Elias cut in, his nose, indeed swollen and bruised.
Varric grimaced at Elias’s bloody face, and felt his stomach drop into the Deep Roads as he realized he was in for a lot worse than just a sliced nose now.
“When we’re done with you dwarf, we’re tossing whatever’s left onto the first slave ship we see!”
There it was.
One dwarf against two angry humans was not going to be a fair or long fight. Watching Elias and Gael pull out their knives, his breath hitched as he reached behind his back for his own blade. Licking his lips, his mind raced for a plan that would end with him walking out of the alley alive, and only one came to mind. Letting go of the hilt of his sheathed knife, he put his hands up disarmingly.
“Now wait a moment, serrahs.” Varric reasoned, standing his ground against their approaching figures. “I think we’re missing a prime opportunity here. Now I can understand you wanting to pay me back for the broken beak, but hear me out first.”
Gael and Elias shared a hesitant look, and while they did not sheath their weapons, neither took another step towards Varric. Taking a moment to lay out his proposition, Varric decided honesty would be the key in this battle.
“ Now did I cheat in that game? Yes-- yes I did. But, so did you. And if either of us played against any other drunk, we would have walked away with lined pockets and no one would have been the wiser. We’re all clever men here, that’s the only reason we all got caught! Now imagine if we combined our techniques? We’d be set!”
“You’d be set!” Gael pointed out “Our boat leaves tomorrow, you’d vanish with our tricks and our money--again!”
“You wound me, Gael.” Varric mourned “Naturally I’d keep a book of my winnings and every time you came into port, a heavy purse with your names on it would be waiting for you in Kirkwall. What do you say?”
The two looked as if they were considering letting Varric go with all his body parts in place, when a deep voice echoed into the alley.
“There you are Varric!”
Peeking between the two sailors, Varric gave a huge sigh of relief at the sight of two of his house servants at the entrance of the alcove.
Hugin, while not a particularly impressive dwarf, served as Bartrand’s steward, and that came with experience in fighting in back alleys when deals go bad. Behind Hugin was Mori, the house kitchen boy, and a good friend of Varric’s. While he didn’t really engage in Guild business, a few drunken nights on the town taught Varric that the boy had a mean right hook. Luck seemed to be on Varric’s side tonight.
Good, the bitch owed him a few.
“Everything alright here, Messer?” Hugin pressed, eyeing the two humans warily.
“Just having a friendly conversation.” Varric smiled at Gael and Elias pointedly.
“Walk away Dwarves, our quarrel is with this Lowtown trash, not you.” Gael warned, turning to brandish his blade at the two house servants.
“Messer Varric is hardly Lowtown trash!” Mori chuckled. “He’s of house Tethras, and a high standing member of the Dwarven Guild.
“I suggest you run back to your boats, humans.” Hugin offered, pulling out a knife of his own. “Unless you plan to make enemies of the Guild today.”
Both humans stiffened at the thought, and skittish looks crossed their faces. Even if they survived this skirmish in the alley, crossing the Guild meant a Coterie knife in your back or a poisoned drink with your supper. Suddenly a little card game seemed a petty thing to lose a life over.
Elias quickly sheathed his blade and Gael reluctantly followed suit. They cautiously edged closer to the two dwarves and the only exit, holding their hands up in a sign on peace.
“Forgive us Serrahs, we meant no offense.” Elias begged.
“They had a little too much to drink.” Varric offered with a shrug “Just got carried away.”
“Exactly!” Gael smiled back at Varric wiltingly. “The drink went to our heads! We meant no--We’re sorry!”
Mori took a step aside and the two sailors bolted without another word, spending the rest of the month looking over their shoulders for assassins in the dark.
Varric gave an exaggerated sigh of relief and happily approached the house servants.
“Andraste’s sweet ass, am I glad you two showed up!” He chuckled as Mori reached out a hand and pulled Varric into a brief embrace. “Who knew Rivaini’s were such terrible card players?”
“Who knew a dwarf could be so bad at cheating?” Mori snickered. “I keep telling you, don’t play all your cards at once!”
“Yeah, I’ll remember that next time.” Varric grumbled as he tenderly felt at his swelling eye. “Thanks for coming along like that.”
“It wasn’t by accident, your brother sent us to find you.” Hugin jumped in his voice dropping into a whisper, “He has some important family matters to discuss.”
“Does he?” Varric groaned, already bored at the idea of talking business with his brother.
“Yes.” Mori added, “He sent us after you hours ago but you weren’t at the Guild meeting like you said you’d be.”
A light went off in Varric’s head as he recalled that’s what he was doing out of the mansion that day. Well, he was supposed to, but he decided to take a detour to a few Taverns along the way. Bartrand was not going to be happy to hear that.
“Yeah about that,” Varric chuckled nervously as the three Dwarfs ascended the stairs to return to Hightown. “Let’s not tell him about this little adventure, shall we?”
____________________________________________
Staring at his reflection in a display of polished dwarven armor, Varric sighed as he noted the greenish purple hue that was beginning to stain his cheek and eyelid. A maid scurried behind him as the household began lighting the fires and lanterns for the evening. By the time Varric and his escort had returned to the Tethras house, the sun had begun to set over Kirkwall, meaning Bartrand had been waiting almost all day for Varric to come home. And if there’s one thing Bartrand wasn’t it was patient.
The black eye throbbed on his face as he made his way down the stairs and towards his brother’s study. Bartrand was always a stickler for appearances, and while this would not be the first black eye Varric had worn to his office, he knew Bartrand would take it as a personal offense that his little brother had the nerve to allow himself to even get clocked in the face.
Bartrand took a lot of things personally.
Coming to the study, Varric took a deep breath before rapping on the solid oak door.
“Come in.”
Slowly creeping open the door, Varric’s eyes swept the room for his brother until he found him at a bookshelf shoving a piece of folded paper into a book. Quickly returning the tome to its place on the shelf, Bartrand turned and locked eyes with his beloved baby brother.
“You filthy lying little nug-humper, where have you been all day? And don’t say the Guild meetings, I know for a fact you weren’t there!”
Varric quickly shut the door and countered his brother’s steps as he made his way across the room.
“I may have gotten a little...sidetracked along the way.”
“So I’ve heard.” Bartrand grouched, taking a seat behind his desk. Almost disappearing behind mountains of paperwork. “Wasting the day away in Lowtown taverns cheating Rivaini sailors out of their money.”
“If you’re having me followed, why bother asking me what you already know?” Varric sighed, plopping recklessly in a chair. “This is why we never have anything to talk about at dinner.”
“Dammit Varric, you were supposed to represent our family at that meeting! What are the other houses to think of us if one of us isn’t there?”
“That maybe we have more interesting things to do?”
Bartrand’s face was taking on a hue of red, and the little vein on his forehead began pulsing. There was a pool going around of when and who was going to cause it to burst. If Varric was allowed into the pool he would bet on himself, he was very good at testing his brother’s limits.
Bartrand slammed his hands on his desk, sending papers flying as he stood and stared down at his brother furiously.
“Loitering in low-class taverns, gambling away family money, and getting knocked around like a kitchen elf--by humans no less! Is it your life’s mission to bring shame down on this household?”
“Don’t you think father beat me to that punch, brother?” Varric’s voice faltered at the end of his comment, knowing he just went too far.
“Don’t push me Varric.” Bartrand glowered, his voice quiet like a storm. “I’m this close to throwing your sodding ass out on the street!”
Varric sullenly looked away from his brother, their game no longer fun. Plucking a quill from Bartrand’s desk, he twirled it silently as he waited for Bartrand to calm down and continue.
“This ‘reckless little brother’ act is getting old, Varric. As are you. You’re 26 now, it’s time you start stepping up and being an active member of this family and our business ventures.”
Varric stopped fiddling with the feather as he felt the point of this meeting coming close.
“I have a job for you, it’s important, it’s dangerous, and it’s the last chance I’m giving you to prove yourself worthy of the name Tethras.”
Rising from his desk, Bartrand paced to the fireplace contemplatively; coming to the hearth, he stared into the fire intently.
“I’ve been brokering a deal with a lieutenant of the Coterie, Dougal Gavorn. Our profits and product are growing, and I can’t rely on hired idiots to keep them safe anymore.”
Bartrand turned to find Varric contrarily depositing the quill into its stand before examining his nails for ink stains. With a harrumph Bartrand pressed on.
“I have a shipment coming in from Orzammar at the end of the week, a test run to see if those nug-humpers can actually provide the security we need. They’ll intercept the caravan in the Free Marches and bring it to Kirkwall, and I want you there to make sure those thugs don’t run off with my property!”
Varric quickly twisted in his chair and stared at his older brother is shock.The name Dougal Gavorn was completely foreign to Varric, and while he did try to keep tabs on all the dangerous people his brother allied with, Varric made it a point to avoid the Coterie when he could. He’d heard stories in taverns and the few Guild meetings he did attend, and they sounded like nothing but backstabbers and cut-throats .A bear he’d rather not poke. Yet here Bartrand was tying a juicy steak around his neck and telling him to go make friends with the bear.
“And uh-- how exactly do you suggest I do that, dear brother?” Varric chuckled, as he anxiously joined his brother at the fireside, already imagining his body lying dead in a ditch.
“I’m not exactly a warrior or marksman, Bartrand!”
Bartrand huffed, and reached over the fireplace, yanking the crossbow that was mounted above the mantle, he shoved it his brother’s hands. Leaning towards his brother he gave him a derisive leer, clearly enjoying Varric’s distressed face.
“Then you better start practicing.”
_____________________________________
Trudging from Bartrand’s office, Varric wearily hefted the crossbow over his shoulder as he processed what just happened. Not only had his flesh and blood threatened to cut him out of the family, he also elected him to go on a dangerous adventure out of the city with some of Kirkwall’s least savory citizens.
Some days Varric wondered if Bartrand found ways to torment him just because he actually had a life.
And people who liked him.
More or less.
Scaling the stairway slowly, Varric decided to dump the lump of wood and metal in his room before going to dinner when a loud crash and the excited voices of women drew him down the left wing of the manor towards his mother’s room. Coming to her door, he tried to make out the commotion inside when it abruptly swung open and a young dwarf maid named Mela came barreling out of the room, slamming into Varric and sending them both to the floor as something small and expensive flew over them and shattered against the hallway wall. The maid scrambled off of Varric and desperately grabbed the knob of the door, yanking it shut behind her as something sturdy collided with a thud.
Expelling an exhausted sigh, Mela leaned against the door in defeat until she realized just who she had leveled onto the floor.
“Oh, dirt and spit!” the maid spluttered, as she grabbed Varric’s arm to help him up. “Please forgive me Messer Varric, I didn’t mean to knock you over, it’s just--you see--your mother she--!”
“Problems, Mela?”
Mela straightened hurriedly “It’s my own fault Messer, I tried to convince her to eat some of her dinner. Lady Tethras hasn’t been eating much lately.”
“Hmm.” Varric muttered as he and Mela switched positions at the door.
Varric worried about his mother’s health. She hadn’t seen the sun in months and seems to be wasting away more with each passing day. The healers say it’s an ailment of the liver, brought on by her drinking after her husband’s passing. A terrible refuge from the disillusionment of life Ilsa Tethras suffered at the reckless hands of her husband Andvar.
Varric knocked lightly on the ornate bedroom door.
“Mother? Are you awake?”
Something collided with the other side of the door, as a shakey voice retorted.
“Of course I’m awake! How can I sleep with an assassin trying to kill me?”
Shooting the baffled Mela a wink, Varric ventured into his mother’s room, leaving the door ajar should he need to retreat from his mother’s throwing arm.
The room was dark and stale as Varric tread carefully into the room. A soft crunch below his boot made him examine the mess in front of the door; some tableware, a shattered bowl, and what looked like porridge cluttered the door frame. The fireplace burned a dull orange as its embers began to die from neglect. Peering into the gloomy room, Varric’s eyes scanned over the shadows until they came to rest on a small lump hunched on a chaise lounge.
Varric deposited his crossbow at the foot of his mother’s bed and made his way across the room to her. Edging closer, his eyes adjusted to the dark and he reached out to touch his mother’s shoulder.
“Mother? What are you doing out of bed?”
“Who are you?” Ilsa hissed, stumbling off the lounge and crawling away on her hands and knees..
“What are you doing in here? Did she send you in? That little assassin, she’s trying to kill me, I know she is!”
Sighing to himself, Varric chased after her, gently grabbing her arm he forced his mother to face him. In a soothing voice, as if coaxing a spooked animal, he tried to find where his mother’s tangled mind was.
“Mother, do you know where you are? Do you know who I am?”
“What a stupid question, of course I know where I am!” Ilsa glowered straightening with indignation.
“We’re in Orzammar, in my bedroom. And you better pray to your ancestors my husband doesn’t find you in here, assassin!”
Varric’s heart clenched as he realized how far she had regressed. With guiding hands, he encouraged her to her feet and began helping her hobble to bed.
“No mother, I’m not an assassin.” He explained as she sank onto her bed with a labored groan. “You’re in Kirkwall, topside, remember? You moved here with Father and Bartrand years ago.”
“Kirkwall.” Ilsa parroted, as she tried to rub at her swollen legs, her breathing grew pained and Varric swept her hands aside and proceeded to massage her ankles. “Where’s Andvar?”
Varric’s ministrations hesitated for a moment before he continued, moving on to her calves, he always hated this part.
“Father’s not here anymore, he died...a long time ago. Do you remember?”
“Oh,” Ilsa mumbled quietly, the shimmer of tears glittered in her eyes as she looked away from Varric. “Oh yes, that’s right...”
“Do you know who I am?” Varric wondered, leaving his mother’s legs to take her hands gently in his.
“No.”
Varric pressed his forehead into their joined hands, fighting the urge to run away. To leave her in the dark, in the past, and pass the responsibility to someone else. But she was his mother. She needed him.
“I’m Varric.” He explained, his voice wavering in frustration. “My name is Varric, I’m your son. You’re m-my mother.”
“Varric...I remember that name.” Ilsa mused as Varric stood and moved towards the fireplace.
Varric swallowed the lump in his throat and poked at the embers. As he added more logs to the grate, he could feel his mother’s eyes on his back. “You’re my son?” Ilsa asked, trying to piece together her memories.
“That’s right, mother.” Varric plucked the tinder from a box from the mantle.
“And... we’re in Kirkwall....”
After a few moments of striking the flint against the fire steel, Varric sparked the fireplace back to life. The room brightened considerably, and he turned to see his mother had climbed under her covers, her eyes closed and chest rising and falling. Kneeling next to her bed, Varric, watched her for a few moments. Stroking a hand that lay on her swollen stomach, he examined the yellow tint her skin had grown in the past few months. With gentle touches, he ran his fingers through her thinning hair, remembering when her tresses were a soft gold. Nowadays her hair hung limp and lifeless, all the color and vibrancy gone.
Ilsa began to stir from the caresses and slowly gurgled awake. Stifling a yawn, her eyes darted around the room as she drew herself up on her pillows until they came to rest on Varric. A light seemed to flicker in her eyes. Her expression softened and a small smile graced her lips as she tentatively reached out to her son.
“Oh,Varric!” She whispered, tenderly pressing her hand to his cheek. “What’s wrong my treasure?”
“Nothing Mother...nothing.” Varric smiled, cradling his hand over hers. “How are you feeling?”
“Oh, I’m fine.” she croaked, leaning back into her pillows “Although some food would be nice. That maid, I don’t like her. She doesn’t listen, she brings me poor food and refuses to give me wine. I think she’s trying to kill me! Be a dear and fire that maid, she’s good for nothing, and I don’t trust her.”
Varric held his tongue as he considered his mother’s request. Mela was a good girl, a hard worker, and had served the Tethras family well. She had come all the way from Orzammar at his request to care for his mother as her health declined this past two years. Glancing up at the thick dusty curtains that shut out all light from his mother’s room, Varric’s heart tightened at the lengths he’d gone to let his mother believe she was still in Orzammar. Her memory had vanished into the bottom of a bottle, clinging more and more into the past, back when father was alive, when their family name held true power, and everything was simpler. He tried his best to keep her with him in the present, but at times like this, her poor memory could be used to his advantage.
“Of course mother,” He soothed, brushing a few stray strands of her faded blond hair from her forehead. “Whatever your heart desires. I believe Hugin has a niece who could take your maid’s place. Her name is Mela, I’ve mentioned her to you before, haven’t I?”
“Mela,” Ilsa mused staring up at the canopy of her bed as she tried to remember. “The name does sound familiar. Yes, I believe you have mentioned her before. Anyone would be better than that imbecile I have now. How soon can she start?”
“As soon as possible, I’ll have Hugin send for her.”
“You’re such a good boy, Varric.” Ilsa beamed as Varric stood and went to the door. After a few hushed words, Mela scurried off to the kitchens to bring Varric a jug of water and another meal for his mother. Closing the door, Varric turned to his mother as she sat poised with her arms out to him. “Come here, my treasure.”
Crossing the carpet, he perched on the bed and leaned into her embrace. For a moment, he was a child again, safe in her arms as she hosted salons. She used to smell of rose and mint, and on impulse Varric breathed deep in her neck and in an instant, he was dragged back to the present. She smelled nothing like that anymore, now only a sweet and rotten musk hung around her. She smelled like liquor, like sickness, like death. He hated the smell and yet, he pulled her closer as if he could feel his mother’s life slipping through his fingers like sand.
“What is that doing here?”
Varric focused his thoughts and pulled away to look at his mother’s face. Her amber eyes were fixed at the crossbow at the end of the bed. Detaching from Ilsa’s arms, Varric reached back and brought the wretched lump of wood between he and his mother.
“Bartrand gave it to me.” he explained, twinging at the cord of the weapon.
“It was my father’s.” Ilsa muttered, tracing the ornate handle reminiscently. “I had no idea this made it to the surface. We had to leave so quickly, I thought it was lost forever.”
Varric’s breath hitched as he realized his mother was having a full moment of clarity. They were so rare nowadays. Normally she only existed in the past or in the present, never both at the same time.
“Why would Bartrand give you this?” his mother edged, locking eyes with her youngest son.
“I’m um--going away for a while, and I’ll need it.” Varric explained, rubbing at the back of his neck.
“Away?” His mother gasped, taking hold of her son’s hand. “Where?”
“Now don’t worry yourself mother, I’ll only be gone for a week at most. Bartrand has some business with the Coterie--”
“Bartrand!” Ilsa spat, “He never comes to see me, he wants me to just hurry up and die. All he cares about is money and business. He’s just like his father, and to make deals with the Coterie--!” A wild look grew in Ilsa’s eyes and with surprising strength, her hands clamped down hard on Varric’s and she lowered her voice conspiratorially.“He’s going to kill you!”
“What? Mother, calm down, Bartrand would never betray me.”
“No, no Varric!” Ilsa wailed, grasping at his shirt and trying to pull him close. “He’s just like his father, he’ll sacrifice anything for money!”
“Mother, please!”
But it was no use, Ilsa was gone. Varric tried to pull himself free on his mother’s clawing hands as she grew more frantic, his skin stinging as her nails dug desperately into arms
“He’s going to take you away from me! My son, my little treasure! He wants me dead, he wants you dead!”
Varric managed to pry himself free of her grip and tumbled off the bed, taking the crossbow with him. In her fit, Ilsa buried herself under her blankets and pillows, her muffled wails and accusations growing softer and softer until the room was silent. Varric stared in horror at what he just witnessed, as the small lump under the blankets rose and fell with his mother’s breaths.
“Mother?” A soft knock at the door broke the spell as Mela announced herself from the other side.
The soft shuffle of sheets drew Varric back to the bed and his mother sat there, staring at the fire as if the last few moments had never been. She sat stiff, staring into the fire, her mind clearly elsewhere.
“Mother, I have to go now. One of the maids has brought you dinner.”
“Send her in, I’m famished.”
“Yes mother.”
“And send someone up with more firewood.”
“Of course mother.”
Ilsa pulled her blanket up to her chin and glared at Varric with crafty eyes.
“And stop calling me mother. I don’t know who you are, but you’re certainly not my little Bartrand.”
Varric blinked back a few rebellious tears as he bowed his head in apology.
“Of course, sorry mothe--sorry.”
“Don’t you come near me again, or I’ll have my husband kill you! He’s a very important dwarf, you know? We are the noble house Tethras!”
“Of course, Lady Tethras. You’ll never see me again.” With a short bow, Varric grabbed the crossbow and spun on his heels, making his way to the door. Throwing it open, he stepped aside as Mela made her way in. The maid stopped short as she saw the grief in Varric’s eyes, she looked to her lady, before offering him a small smile.
“She’s just having one of her bad days.”
Varric blinked back any emotion Mela could read and wandered through the halls to his own room. Tossing the crossbow onto his desk, Varric sank into his chair with a sigh.
Laying his head in his arms, Varric’s thoughts drifted to memories and soon he fell into a heavy sleep, his cheeks sticky with tears.
#dragon age#Dragon age 2#Varric Tethras#Bartrand Tethras#Hawke#fan fic writing#fan fiction#Kirkwall#sad fanfiction#Varric fanfiction#fanfiction#A Dutiful Son#The Chronicles of Varric Tethras
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im such a bitch heres some fun facts about me
how tall are you?
5 foot 2ish
what is your body type?
ex-gymnist who wakeboards a lot
what is your favorite part about your body?
um my boobs i guess idk
is your current hair color your natural hair color?
currently dirty blonde but once summer/vacation comes around my hair will go black to bleach blonde on its own
are you more outgoing or more shy
im quiet
are you more femme or butch?
femme
are you tol or smol?
smol bean
wine mom or vodka aunt?
vodka aunt
weird habit?
need chapstick 24/7
favorite meme?
bon apetit
do you sing in the shower?
i used to but now i just have therapy with myself
ever used a bow and arrow?
nope
are/were you a theatre kid?
yes haha
have you ever seen a broadway musical?
i want to!!
do you think musicals are cheesy?
no wtf i was just in one yesterday it was amazing
have you ever been a part of a protest or a march?
no
favorite Cards Against Humanity Card?
all of them also this just reminded me im gonna buy this game
last movie you watched?
monsters in lol
behind the camera or in front of it?
behind
favorite tv show?
30 rock
meaning behind your url
it came to me randomly
reason you joined tumblr
in 7th grade my friend told me it was cool and here i am 5yrs later with like 4 blogs
who’s your closest tumblr friend?
my irl friend alex
what’s something most people love that you hate?
kim k
have you ever taken narcotics?
no
have you had sex?
i wish
have you ever gotten caught sneaking out or doing anything bad?
never caught :)))
worst/funniest lie you’ve ever told?
funniest lie is that im straight lol
describe your passion without mentioning it.
its all with our mouths ;)
describe your best friend.
cute, funny, dumb asf, the best
give us one thing about you that no one knows.
im an open book just ask and i will tell
how do you feel right now?
tired and hungry
what is your biggest fear?
alone forever also sleep paralysis
what’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?
gold mine by colbie calliat idk how to spell it
what is the best decision you’ve made in your life so far?
saying no balls to myself and stalking through instagrams on a 3hr car ride to find my girl and the her snap and then sayying no balls and snapping her :))
have you ever tried your hardest and then been disappointed in the end?
currently putting forth minimum effort i have senioritis
something you fantasize about.
kiss my gorl
last time you cried and why
last night or maybe it was this morning? i was doing the 24hr musical at my school (we have 24hrs to put together an ENTIRE musical and all $ goes to charity!) but i cried from laughing so hard doing yoga
what was the last thing that made you laugh?
the 24 hr musical
do you really, truly miss someone right now?
grandmaaa
who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything?
my church gc bc we the true ho(e)mies
the last time you felt broken?
idk like a week ago
are you starting to realize anything?
ya actually maybe im just a lesbian and not bi who knows
are you more dominant or more submissive?
sub i think
i’ll only date you if _____. (fill in the blank)
you make me smile
do you prefer to date people the same age as you, younger, or older?
same age
describe the person you’re in love with/have a crush on in great detail.
great detail lets go!
shes in my grade bu9t goes to a different school but her hair is short like mine but darker and shes tanner than me and taller but just by a little bit! she has really nice eyes and a good smile and is sososo sweet no matter what stupid thing i say to her and i miss her a lot i wanna cuddle with her and i when we go on our next date catch me cuddling with her no matter what and she is in band too but going to college way far away in the fall so we will both be sad bois then but its okay because we have all summer to hang out and cuddle and be something did i mention she is pretty af
do you have any kinks?
no
first thing you notice in a person?
tbh if they smell good and teeth
how can someone win your heart?
call me pretty
been rejected by a crush?
haha yes but its okay guys
have you ever had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back?
no but vice versa so thats super awkward
would you have sex with the last person you text messaged?
no
is trust a big issue for you?
i just want the truth
did you hang out with the person you like recently?
is november for 2hrs considered recent ;(
is confidence cute?
YES
what would you say if the person you love/like kissed another girl/boy?
happy 4 u
would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh?
no lol
does the person you have feelings for right now know you do?
yes she does
ever embarrass yourself in front of a crush?
got my car stuck in the mud infront of hher on our first date
do you want to get married
yes!
worst thing you’ve ever done?
been a big bitch
three things that turn you on.
being called babe/baby, being teased, and idk
who do you hate?
lowkey one of my super lose friends oops
favorite term of endearment?
love
who was your celebrity/fictional gay awakening?
ANNA KENDRICK GOD DAMN
intimidating girls or kind girls?
kindddd
what do you look for in a possible partner?
nice to me
do you tend to like more masculine, feminine, or androgynous girls?
i do not know ive only really ever liked one girl and also my straight best friend bc im a dumb bitch
are you good at flirting?
tbh no
who was the first person you came out to?
my church gc
do you have any friends who are wlw?
YEs!
is your crush wlw?
ye
last person to make you reconsider your sexuality?
the boy who asked me to prom has me thinking am i bi or lesbooo
write a short love poem to your crush/self?
sweet are your eyes like honey in the sun
you make me smile
do you fall in love easily?
no
is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about?
that time i was a big boi bitch to a girl
are you good at hiding your feelings?
ha no
are you a forgiving person?
yes
what is your “type?”
good question
fall asleep in her arms or rub her back until she falls asleep in yours?
probs fall asleep on her
tall girls or short girls?
taller than mee
hugs or kisses?
kiss!
twirl her around or get twirled?
TWIRL HER THAT WOULD BE SO CUTE
tummy kisses or thigh kisses?
ooh both
hairline kisses or neck kisses?
neckk
play with her hair or stroke her tummy?
both
making out or soft kisses?
soft kisses
hugs around the neck or hugs around the waist?
NECK OO
how confident are you in your sexuality?
haha good one im happy with who i am tho!
when you like someone do you blush or get butterflies in your stomach?
butterflies to the maxx
have you ever liked a friend as more than a friend? did you tell them?
like(d) my straight best friend and will not be telling her that lol
my girl tho i def told her ;))
how old were you when you realized you were into girls?
16ish id say
most embarrassing thing you’ve done in front of a cute girl?
so many things everything i do is embarassing
do you have a favorite lesbian ship? is it canon?
BECHLOE!
what is the most aggravating thing someone has said to you about your sexuality?
every word about lgbt that comes out of my mothers mouth since i am not out to her and now not planning on it for a very long time bc shes a big ignorant bitch!!
when was the last time a girl made your heart flutter?
haha good question idk
what is love to you?
ALWAYS putting others before you no matter what
ask me anything.
i will answer do it no balls
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348.
5000 Question Survey Pt. 1
1. Who are you?
dee.
2. What are the 3 most important things everyone should know about you?
i live in sydney, i’m 26 and i’m so bored that i’m gna attempt this.
3. When you aren't filling out 5,000 question surveys like this one what are you doing?
working, sleeping, eating or hanging out with my boyfriend and/or friends.
4. List your classes in school from the ones you like the most to the ones you like the least (or if you are out of school, think of the classes you did like and didn't like at the time).
i liked visual arts the most, religion the least.
5. What is your biggest goal for this year?
to find a new job.
6. Where do you want to be in 5 years?
hopefully found a good career, married with either kids or planning to have kids.
7. What stage of life are you in right now?
i’m still finding myself.
8. Are you more child-like or childish?
childish i guess.
9. What is the last thing you said out loud?
bye.
10. What song comes closest to how you feel about your life right now?
20 something - sza.
11. Have you ever taken martial arts classes?
i did back in 7th grade, quit after i got yellow belt lmao.
12. Does your life tend to get better or worse or does it just stay the same?
it’s been the same for the past couple of years. hopefully it’s just better from now on.
13. Does time really heal all wounds?
kinda. it definitely eases the ‘pain’.
14. How do you handle a rainy day?
i complain if i have to work, i love it if i’m staying home.
15. Which is worse...losing your luggage or having to sort out tangled holiday lights?
definitely losing my luggage.
16. How is your relationship with your parents? Will you miss them when they are gone?
my relationship with my parents is pretty good. we’re not super close but we all get along.
17. Do you tend to be aware of what is going on around you?
usually.
18. What is the truest thing that you know?
haha not sure. that i’m currently living this life?
19. What did you want to be when you grew up?
a singer or actress even though i couldn’t sing or act.
20. Have you ever been given a second chance?
yep.
21. Are you more of a giver or a taker?
giver.
22. Do you make your decisions with an open heart/mind?
yes.
23. What is the most physically painful thing that has ever happened to you?
this weird migraine/virus thing i had a couple years ago. it’s probably the last time in forever i’ve cried because of pain. i’m surprised i didn’t go to the hospital.
24. What is the most emotionally painful thing that has ever happened to you?
going through my parents’ separation and having my grandmother die within three months.
25. Who have you hugged today?
like five of my friends.
26. Who has done something today to show they care about you?
my boyfriend drove us to dinner tonight lol.
27. Do you have a lot to learn?
of course. there’s always room to learn.
28. If you could learn how to do three things just by wishing and not by working what would they be?
all skills needed for i.t., all skills needed for nursing/doctor, all skills needed for management.
29. Which do you remember the longest: what other people say, what other people do or how other people make you feel?
how people make me feel.
30. What are the key ingredients to having a good relationship?
basically having the same kind of relationship as best friends and being in love with each other.
31. What 3 things do you want to do before you die?
get married, have kids, live to see my grandchildren.
32. What three things would you want to die to avoid doing?
pap smears, long plane trips and taking shoes off and laptops out at airport security lol.
33. Is there a cause you believe in more than any other cause?
hmm idk lol. gay marriage and feminism.
34. What does each decade make you think of:
The 19..
20's: flapper girls (i could totally be in the wrong decade, my bad)
30's: american gangsters
40's: betty boop
50's: sound of music
60's: marilyn monroe
70's: disco era
80's: neon
90's: grunge
2000: sept 11
2010's: eyebrows
35. Which decade do you feel the most special connection to and why?
90s. i loved my childhood.
36. What is your favorite oldie/classic rock song?
bohemian rhapsody.
37. What country do you live in and who is the leader of that country? If you could say any sentence to the current leader of your country what would it be?
australia, malcolm turnbull. make gay marriage legal already.
38. What's your favorite TV channel to watch in the middle of the night?
i don’t really have a favourite channel, i just watch certain shows i like.
39. What Disney villain are you the most like and why?
ursula hahaha. that makeup tho.
40. Have you ever been a girl scout/boy scout?
nope.
41. If you were traveling to another continent would you rather fly or take a boat?
definitely fly unless it’s on a luxury cruise ship.
42. Why is the sky blue during the day and black at night?
because of the sun.
43. What does your name mean?
goddess of wine.
44. Would you rather explore the deeps of the ocean or outer space?
neither tbh. i don’t like the depths of the unkown.
45. Word association
What is the first word that comes to mind when you see the word:
Air: bender
Meat: sweats
Different: strokes
Pink: panther
Deserve: more
White: dove
Elvis: presley
Magic: carpet
Heart: love
Clash: band
Pulp: fiction
46. If you could meet any person in the world who is dead who would you want it to be?
my grandparents.
47. What if you could meet anyone who is alive?
rihanna.
48. Is there a movie that you love so much you could watch it everyday?
haha not really.
49. You are going to be stuck alone in an elevator for a week. What do you bring to do?
a ton of food, a puzzle book, my kindle, my phone and charger, a bed lol.
50. Have you ever saved someone's life or had your life saved?
nope.
51. Make up a definition for the following silly words...
Fruitgoogle: a fruit that’ll appear every time you google something and you have to eat it to get the results lol
Ambytime: time for an ambulance
Asscactus: a cactus in the shape of an ass
52. What was the last thing you made with your own hands?
food.
53. What was your favorite toy as a child?
probably my cabbage patch doll.
54. How many TV’s are in your house?
five.
55. What is your favorite thing to do outside?
lie down in the sun.
56. How do you feel when you see a rainbow?
happy i guess. i always point it out.
57. Have you ever dreamt a dream that came true?
yep.
58. Have you ever been to a psychic/tarot reader?
nope. i don’t think i’d want to tbh.
59. What is your idea of paradise?
a sunny beach resort that’s all inclusive.
60. Do you believe in god and if so what is he/she/it like?
yeah i do, but idk what they’re like.
61. Do you believe in Hell?
i think so.
62. What one thing have you done that most people haven't?
visit nearly all continents of the world.
63. What is the kindest thing you have ever done?
do any favours that weren’t expected of me i guess.
64. Are you a patient person?
not really.
65. What holiday should exist but doesn't?
ha idk.
66. What holiday shouldn't exist but does?
none.
67. What's the best joke you ever heard?
i’ve heard plenty, i just don’t have a favourite.
68. Where is the most fun place you have EVER been?
disney world!
69. Is your hair natural or dyed?
the ends are dyed, otherwise natural.
70. Do you have any deep dark secrets or are you pretty much up front?
i’m up front.
71. What is under your bed right now?
boxes of junk, presents i never used, a huge bag of hand sanitzers from bath and body works, old uni booked etc.
72. If you were in the Land of Oz would you want to live there or go home?
go home thanks.
73. If you drive do you frequently speed?
yes.
74. What is the world's best song to dance to?
idk haha.
75. What song was on the last time you danced with someone?
i forgot.
76. Do you prefer Disney or Warner Brothers?
disney.
77. What is the first animal you would run to see if you went to the zoo?
panda. i don’t think i’ve ever seen one in real life.
78. Would you consider yourself to be romantic?
not really.
79. If the earth stopped rotating would we all fly off?
no idea.
80. What is the one thing that you love to do so much that you would make sacrifices to be able to do it?
traveling. saving money to travel is a bitch, not to mention getting time off from your job etc.
81. If you (and everyone) had to lose one right or freedom, but you could pick which one everyone had to lose, what would you pick?
idk tbh.
82. If you had to choose would you live on the equator or at the North Pole?
equator.
83. Would you rather give up listening to music or watching television?
errrr. that’s hard. watching tv i guess. since i watch all my shows on my laptop anyway.
84. What do you think makes someone a hero?
doing something good for the masses and being inspirational.
85. What cartoon would you like to be a character in?
aladdin.
86. Name one thing that turns your stomach:
bad smells.
87. What was the last thing you paid for?
dinner.
88. Are you a coupon clipper?
nah, we never get any good coupons here.
89. Get anything good in the mail recently?
yeah, my purchase from ebay.
90. Which would you rather take as a gym class...dancing, sailing, karate, or bowling?
bowling lol.
91. In Star Trek people 'beam' back and forth between different places. What this means is they stand in a little tube and their molecules are deconstructed and sent to another tube somewhere else where they are reassembled. Only problem is when the molecules are deconstructed the person is dead. When they are put back together it is only a clone that has all the dead person's memories. So... Is the person who gets beamed the same person on both ends?
physically no... it’s like that ship paradox i guess.
92. What insects are you afraid of?
cockroaches.
93. If you could print any phrase on a T-shirt, what would it say?
nothing to wear.
94. What's the most eccentric thing you have ever worn?
cat ears? lol it was for halloween.
95. If you could pick one food that you could eat all you wanted but it would have no effect on how much you weigh, what food would it be?
hotdogs. actually ribs.
96. What are your parents interested in?
they love tv shows and movies. my dad loves fishing too lol.
97. Have you ever caught an insect and kept it as a pet? Have you ever caught and tamed a wild animal?
no and no.
98. What is more helpful to you, wishes or plans?
plans definitely. i’m too lazy to make my wishes come true.
99. When do you feel your life energy the strongest?
when i’m the most awake?
100. You are spending the night alone in the woods and may bring only 3 items with you. What do you bring?
a tent, bed and food.
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Crying in a Coffee Shop (a Jin x Reader fic)
[is based on a real life story lol. crossposted on ao3]
The coffee shop was quickly filling up with people as the after-lunch rush started coming in by the droves. On any other day, you would have migrated to the small nook table tucked further in the shop, away from the chattering and bustling. Your earphones could only drown out so much noise without ruining your eardrums for good, and while you hated silence, you couldn’t really concentrate in the rush hour noise.
Today, however, you’d failed to transfer to a more secluded seat, but you were far too preoccupied to mind the noise anymore. Right then, you were neck deep into the absolutely riveting masterpiece you’d discovered in a fan fiction site. Right then, it was breaking your heart, smooshing the wreckage further into your punctured chest, as your favorite OTP sinks at some author’s well placed plot twists.
You didn’t want to believe it; the earlier chapters were filled with such heart-fluttering romances, and cute couple moments, it was difficult to believe you were reading the same piece of fan fiction. A part of you had already recognized the telltale signs of angst and tragedy three chapters ago, with that military phone call. Still, you refused to believe this author was cruel enough to make you ship your OTP even harder, only to sink it with as much ammunition.
He turns his back to her yet again, steps out her doorway, out her home, out her heart, heading off to God knows where, facing God knows what new form of danger. Both of them have long foregone promises and false assurances. It was simply a waste of time, of breath, of words. They’ve long since learned that Fate did not care what promises they wanted to keep.
He’d already lost count of the promises he’d broken, every time he came back a little less whole, a lot more scarred. A lot more battle worn.
She’d already lost count of the promises she’d broken, every time she’d neglected to take care of herself, and forget to eat, forget to bathe, forget to live. Too preoccupied with trying to breathe.
Because deep down, she already knew. The moment she saw his back turn once more, saw that same front door shut for the hundredth time, she knew. That he wouldn’t come back anymore, that he would finally, truly, wholly, break his promise. Because she’d gazed at his back as he left, a hundred times before. But never before had it been tinged with a dreadful finality.
“…No…” You whimpered quietly into your hand, your chest growing tighter as your brain quickly processed where this was going. “No, oh no, please don’t tell me…” You murmured past the lump in your throat.
He bites back a cry of pain as the man yanks his head back by the hair, the rough gag tied around his mouth digging at the chapped corners of his lips. He glares blindly, past the haze of pain and blood loss, cursing himself for his carelessness, for his one moment of weakness that brought him into this situation. Now, his mistake will only cause her to cry more, only cause her to break more. And he would never be able to make it right, to put together the pieces of her he’d broken.
His eyes clenched shut, he tries to imagine her - a time when she was happier, with eyes so bright they outshined the sun, and a smile that belied the sweetness of her kisses. He has barely remembered the way she’d say his name, when the soldier pulls the trigger, and his memories become nothing more than a mass of blood and matter splattered on a cold, dingy holding cell.
When the fateful pristine white envelope comes, two months later, the tears she sheds are already old and familiar. Still, they burned fresh tracks down her numbed cheeks; the pain so real it felt physical. It takes her a long while to realize it is physical, and that the fire burning below her stomach, and down between her legs is very real and very ominous. But by the time she reaches the hospital, it’s too late; only now, she’s lost two parts of her soul, and everything that remained of him.
Unbidden, your tears started spilling one after another. You put down the cursed phone on the table with a clatter, in favor of wiping away your tears. You hadn’t even noticed them grow hot, and yet you barely stifled the sob clenching your chest. Maybe it’s the accumulated stress from the past few weeks - calculus and accounting midterms were a bitch - but you’re surprised and more than a little bit embarrassed that your tears still haven’t stopped.
“Hey, miss, what’s wrong?” A hand rested itself gently on your shoulder, and you instantly froze, remembering at last that, no, you were not in the safety of your dorm room, but out in the middle of a coffee shop, during the peak of the lunch rush. It was a testament to just how into the story you got; inwardly, you make a mental note to mention this later in your review to the author.
Right now, however, you were far too mortified for words. It was hard to believe you of all people would break down in public, much more, over a freakin’ fanfic!
“Miss, are you okay?” The guy dragged the empty chair across from you, promptly sitting beside you. He held out a hanky with one hand, the other rubbing your back. “It’s okay, it’s gonna be fine, you’re going to be okay.”
You felt as if your face was on fire. It was bad enough that you’d unintentionally cried in public, but even worse, some random guy noticed, and deemed you in need of comforting and counseling. It didn’t help that was absolutely gorgeous - no joke; he could’ve very well been a model for some cosmetic or fashion line, and you wouldn’t be surprised one bit. His face was pale and smooth, his pink lips full and thick; and normally you didn’t care much for men with colored hair, but goddammit if his pink hair didn’t look good on him. And his dark eyes were fixed only on you, his face contorted with genuine concern and worry into the most adorable, irresistible look you’ve ever seen.
Your brain practically short-circuited. Part oif you was still caught up in the feelings that cursed fanfic left you with, another just marveling at this beautiful, handsome, gorgeous creature with his broad shoulders and tall, slim build.
When you still hadn’t moved, he moved to wipe your face for you, and that’s when you drew the line, flinching and raising your hands like a shield.
“I-I’m fine! I can do it myself,” You could only take so much humiliation, after all.
He blinked, his face faltering for a split second, before recovering. “Oh, I’m sorry, here.”
Gingerly, you accepted his proffered hanky to gently dab your face dry. You probably looked like a fire hydrant by now, with how hot your face felt. This situation had probably reached a record for the Most Awkward Moment in Coffee Shop History.
And all this time, this angel of a stranger in pink sweater still had not stopped rubbing soothing circles on your back.
Once you felt your face was sufficiently clean, you folded the hanky neatly, but hesitated to return it. “Thanks for this, uhm,” You bit your lip, forcing yourself to look at his face, as was polite. “I’d wash it first before returning it to you, but…”
I don’t know who you are…
“Oh, don’t worry about it,” He smiled; taking the hanky back and tucking it into his pocket. He paused to wet his lips (you pretend your eyes weren’t drawn to the way his pink tongue dragged along thick, pink lips, because no, you were not some perverted, hormonal teenaged girl). “Are you okay, now though?”
You nodded mutely, consciously trying to keep your lips shut. Yes, you were probably a certified human fire hydrant by now.
“Was it a guy?” It took all of you not to choke on your own spit. Now really, how were you supposed to answer that?
“Uh…” You glanced away, trying to find the right words to explain that no, you were not crying over a broken heart because of a guy… actually, you were, but definitely not in the way he was thinking…
“Oh, I’m sorry,” You looked back at him to find the most heart wrenching crestfallen look on his face. “You probably wouldn’t want to talk about such personal things with a total stranger…” Even his wry smile was perfect. God dammnit to heaven and back 24/7. Now you felt like the worst criminal on Earth, as though you’d stolen candy from a kid.
“No, no! It’s not that at all!” You blurted out, a bit too loudly, and he jumped in surprise. You looked down, twisting your fingers. “You’re just really nice and all, I’m just so flustered. A-and it’s not that it’s personal or anything, but it’s just really embarrassing so…”
“No, no,” he shook his head, smiling gently again, and all you could register was pink heaven. “I completely understand. I just thought that you looked really sad, and maybe you needed someone to talk to. But if you don’t feel comfortable with it, then I’m sorry for prying. Just know that everything will really turn out fine, and that you’re not alone.” He paused with a slight wince. “I know that sounded really cliché and maybe too commonly said to sound true, but I really do mean it.”
“No, I’m telling you, it’s really not that at all!” You insisted, exasperated. You buried your face in your hands, debating for the last time whether you wanted Mr. Cute and Concerned to know the extent of your pathetic-ness.
Then again, could you really resist that puppy dog look? No, you could not. You sighed.
“Promise me you won’t laugh.” You mumbled, peeking through your fingers. You didn’t think you could handle this without some form of a shield.
If he was confused by the strange request, he didn’t show it. “I won’t.” He said sincerely.
You drew a deep breath, imagining it as liquid courage. “…The reason I cried was because of the really, really sad story I was reading.”
He blinked once, twice, then promptly looked down at the table, to the incriminating phone still opened to the fan fiction page. “Oh.”
Yeah. Oh.
It had to be the most awkward silence of your life. Personally, you wouldn’t have been able to come up with a better reply than, “oh”.
“Ah,” You whined, burying your face into your hands. “It’s really embarrassing, but it really was a sad story, I swear, and I didn’t expect it at all! I don’t even usually get so emotional over things I read. Actually, I’m usually not so emotional in public, period!”
“Yes, you do.” He replied quietly.
You nearly got whiplash snapping your head up so quickly. “What?”
Now it was Mr. Cute and Concerned who was flushed pink. But dammnit if he didn’t look even more handsome for it! He cleared his throat, avoiding your gaze.
“Uhm, well, this is going to sound weird,” you snorted at his word choice, and the way his lips twitched told you he did it on purpose. “But, I’ve seen you around in this café before, usually busy on your phone or some novel, and well, you’re not exactly unemotional when you do.”
You didn’t even know where to start with that loaded statement. He’s been watching you. You weren’t as discreet as you thought you were. He’s been watching you, here in this coffee shop, reading all those things (and mind, not all of those had been SFW fics)…!
You blushed as he smirked at you. You spluttered, opening and closing your mouth as you struggled for words, but he only laughed, the sound endearing and infectious.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” He said finally, still chuckling. At this point, you’ve managed to muster enough annoyance and displeasure with him to at least stop blushing and smiling.
“You’re right, that does sound weird on so many levels,” you said at last. He had the decency to blush again.
“Ah, this wasn’t how I planned to meet you at all,” he said, chuckling a bit, but it sounded far more forced and sheepish than before. “I’ve always seen you before, and almost always in the same spot, and almost always reading something or other.”
You blushed; you’d really thought you’d made yourself unnoticeable in your little nook. Apparently, the whole, “If I can’t see you, you can’t see me” logic was really just a myth.
“Don’t take this the wrong way, but watching you read is quite fun.” He continued, smiling reassuringly at your wary look. “Your expression always changes with what you read, sometimes I think I can almost see the story progressing just from watching you.”
You groaned, burying your face in your hands. Your dad had mentioned it once, when you’d read a novel across the table from him. You’d been reading the main characters banter and flirt when he suddenly burst out laughing, shaking his head at you.
Well.
“…This is really just awkward and embarrassing,” You said wearily, and Mr. Cute and Concerned laughed again.
“A friend of mine has told me once that my whole life is awkward. So I’d say this is par for the course.”
This time you join in his laughter. If you were honest with yourself, you weren’t any better at being a social butterfly. Finally, after much effort, he stopped laughing long enough to extend his hand.
“I’m Kim Seokjin.”
You returned his handshake, giving him your name in turn. The way he smiled then turned sheepish and coy, his cheeks even brighter than the pink of his sweater. An awkward silence settled between you then, and you scrambled for something to do or say.
“So…” Seokjin began at last. “Would you like a cookie?”
And that was how you found yourself in tears in the middle of a bustling coffee shop for the second time, this time with your cheeks and jaw aching from laughing so much, and a new contact person on your phone nicknamed, Mr. Cute and Concerned (and Pink).
Much, much later, when you meet Jeon Jungkook and the rest of Kim Seokjin’s roommates, they burst out laughing at yet another Seokjin’s Finest™ Awkward Moment entry when you told them how you met.
- Miss March Muffin.
#bts scenarios#fic within a fic#sort of#awkward moments in life are real#kim seokjin#awkward meeting with awkward jin#fluff#coffeeshop au#reader insert#bts imagines#fanfic
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