#being gay and homophobic is such a struggle
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im gay
#oh noooo#ohhh oh nooooo#aww man#fuckkkk noooo#nooooo.....#no!#spacie spoinks#being gay and homophobic is such a struggle
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Steve having a sexuality crisis is all good angst and realistic writing, and Steve having known for a while and being confident and learned is great too, but I love Steve “just skipped the crisis part” Harrington.
Because really, who gives a shit if he’s gay when he’s fought monsters?
His best friend is a lesbian, and he loves her, so it’d be hypocritical not to accept this part of himself.
He’s had to protect his friends from mind demons with Kate Bush songs, this is not even a blip in the crazy shit he’s had to deal with.
One of his children friends has telekinetic powers and can go into your mind to figure out your location and save you from giant spider demons.
He almost died, everyone he loves almost died, who cares?
#steve harrington#stranger things#eddie munson#steddie#stranger things 4#steve harrington x eddie munson#I want to add that if you are gay#and have gay friends#and love them but struggle with interlized homophobia#you are not hypocritical#I added that because it is something I’ve seen done before#not because having self worth issues about your sexuality is homophobic to anybody but yourself#also please don’t be homophobic to yourself#you are perfect and lovely#and regardless of your gender or sexuality#you are a valuable human being and deserve love and happiness#juicepost
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THE EX-MORNING SERIES CONCEPT
By now I think many people have heard that KristSingto’s upcoming series is an original script that was written for them. What we also have confirmed is that it was written about them.
[source]
KRIST: This series was written by P'Backaof and directed by P'Lit where they created this script from the start deliberately for the two of us and they got information for the characters etc. from KristSingto directly. In the series, the name for P'Sing is Tamtawan, and my name is Phatapi. And Tamtawan Tamtawan and Phatapi are KristSingto themselves.
INTERVIEWER: Does that mean you play yourself?
KRIST: [laughing] Yes, we act as ourselves, so it's not difficult at all.
Today, Aof elaborated on his part on Twitter:
[source: @backaof]
[translation: @_beinglistener]
And Jojo added:
[source: @jojotichakorn]
[translation: @_beinglistener]
So, two gay men are the leading creative minds behind KristSingto’s comeback series. Time to study up on your KristSingto history, kids. \:D/
Long live sanctioned RPF. 🎉
#krist perawat#singto prachaya#kristsingto#the ex morning#i’ve already seen the same tired ‘guess rent was due’ about krist and#i see on twitter when people link my thread about krist to people still insisting he’s homophobic#man’s rich#he works constantly#he even said it’s something he regrets now that his grandmother who raised him passed away#he worked so much he didn’t have as much time for his family—who he helps support#he is quite literally considered bl royalty#he has more queer people in his circle than straight#waa (gay) is his mentor#aof (gay) wrote this series and jojo (gay) thought up the concept so even professionally he's supported by queer people#you don’t have to like him#and you don’t have to admit to sending death threats to a stranger who doesn’t speak your language based on rumors you didn’t verify#just y’know#admit quietly to yourself alone in your head that you were wrong and you caused harm to a person who didn’t deserve it#plenty of actors use bl as a stepping stone to bigger jobs#he’s not one of them#he wanted to do bl for years but gmmtv told him he could only work with singto#so literally the only reason kit didn’t do bl until BMF was scheduling issues because singto wanted to study abroad#and singto couldn’t get a fixed date for it and then the pandemic messed with his plans even more#i’m glad to see more and more people are understanding who krist is recently#and even in the series they made pathapi’s controversy an impulsive act of anger#krist has said he used to struggle with being hotheaded#and one of his apologies for the igs was even something like ‘i acted without thinking of how it would look out of context’#he just wanted people to stop harassing him for his sexuality but the context isn’t in the igs#anyway my go-to when i’m too tired to talk about this is always this#if he had ever been homophobic thai people would be the ones leading the charge against him…but it’s interfans
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lol so many bi radfems argue like reactionary manipulative queerio tras and liberals when they're called out for homophobia or told of their privilege ://
#the bihet victim complex#lmao saying someone is calling bisexuals evil for calling out your denial and downplaying of your privilege/homophobia come on#bi women are obsessed with saying liking men is oppression#treating it like it's homosexuality itself#and that gays are oppressing them for it#tra mental gymnastics in all bi communities aside from febfems which many also dislike#it's amazing the community obsessed with converting gay people or showing/telling men lesbians aren't real and can be fixed#has such a victim complex#such narcissism#bisexuals force gay people to always centre and talk about their osa and treat it like oppression#they act like it's an EXTRA struggle over gay people#what other community gets away w this shit#osa don't see lesbian as people#bi women are especially horrible to lesbians despite being ssa so like stop acting like we need to bond w homophobes#“lesbians are oppressing me by assuming I won't be serious about women”#it's a pattern and not our fault your community sucks. that you're so male centric male obsessed homophobic/misogynist and prefer privilege#you admit most bi women prefer men and rarely prefer women#and no “settling” for women bc men are shit and annoy you isn't preferring women#it's exhausting hearing the most homophobic women complain about homophobia like LOOK IN THE MIRROR you hate homosexuals yourself
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THE LONG-AWAITED KANJI TATSUMI POST, aka --
Let's start, firstly, with Kanji's own words:
IMPORTANT: this will touch on real world homophobia, particularly the sort that ran rampant in the early 2000's / 2010's, which translates into the game, as well. Please tread carefully.
The main theme throughout Kanji Tatsumi's Palace is his struggles regarding sexuality, or more accurately, how he must be one "side" or the "other." Kanji's Shadow self, while partially reflecting the tone-deaf nature of how sexuality was interpreted back in the early 2000's, is showcasing a Kanji that is more comfortable, more out with his sexuality... a part of him in which he doesn't identify.
"Accept me for who I am!"
"Can't believe something like this was inside me."
A major part of Kanji's punkish persona stems from this battle. "Feminine hobbies," while thankfully not categorized as such much now-a-days, were regarded as just that: feminine, something men shouldn't enjoy. Kanji, as I've discussed previously, partakes in many such hobbies, an enjoyment which makes students gossip and file him into a category in which he doesn't, he feels, belong. One of Shadow Kanji's main arguments is that girls belittle him, whereas men are less judgmental -- however, I feel that his Shadow took this mentality to an extreme.
"They cry if you get angry, they gossip behind your back, they spread nasty lies... they look at me like I'm some disgusting thing and look at me like I'm a weirdo!"
"But you're a guy! You don't act like a guy! Why aren't you manly?!"
"What does it mean to be a guy? What does it mean to be manly?"
Kanji, I feel, has the experience of most male-identifying individuals in the early 2000's: to cry is to be weak, and to share your emotions is to equate yourself with a "girl," a sentiment which then had negative connotations. Kanji's father died whenever he was very young, and his mother is what influenced him most... something that, unfortunately, would be picked apart in school. With this in mind, Kanji compensated by being every definition of manly he could find: being tough, starting fights, never showing his emotions.
But there were times he would slip. Where he would bring up the fact that he could sew or knit, and his peers would tear him apart for it, because they were "right"; this is to say, Kanji has been torn between multiple sides for many, many years, and this extends toward his sexuality as well.
We first meet Kanji whenever he is meeting with Naoto. To avoid delving in too deep, it is hinted - and shown - that Kanji has a visible crush on Naoto, who at the time is known as the Detective Prince. Later, whenever this is shown to be the opposite, Kanji... has little of a reaction. He doesn't sigh in relief because he "actually is straight all along!" - he's beginning to connect the dots, that he liked Naoto before, and that he likes Naoto now. That is to say, he liked it whenever Naoto represented as a male, and likes Naoto now that she represents as a girl, too. We can see this struggle plainly before the beauty contest:
"If you do, my doubts will finally be cleared" -- this, to me, comes across as desperation: he wants to be straight. He wants his Shadow self to be wrong, because being gay just doesn't ring a bell with him. Neither does being straight. It doesn't fit him, and he only knows two options: either to be straight... or not be straight.
He is shown to be relieved during the beauty contest, by quietly proclaiming how pretty each contestant is, and whenever Naoto doesn't show up for the final part, he is... quiet. That doubt is creeping in again, and he doesn't know how to grow comfortable with it.
The hard, and unfortunate truth, of Kanji's whole story is that he was born at a time where the term bisexual was treated as a naughty word. It wasn't acknowledged, and many people refused to accept that it existed. Kanji's Social Link ties directly into this struggle, with him making a child a doll, and instead of being chastised for it... the boy thanks him. He doesn't bully him, or ask why a boy is knitting a doll. And Kanji, in turn, doesn't question why a boy would want a plush.
Throughout these exchanges, Kanji grows more and more comfortable with himself:
Because... Kanji knows that his Shadow Self is a part of him. Maybe not to the extremes it portrays, but it is a part of him... and a part of him likes men, as well as women. He likes someone no matter their gender. He realizes, slowly, that he appreciates them all the same, as shown most literally shown with Naoto. Slowly, rank by rank, Kanji opens up: that his strength was used as a cover-up for his knitting, that he thought by being tough nobody would care about his other hobbies. That, while he identified with being tough, he didn't like how it was used: to indicate someone that couldn't possibly like the things that he liked. He didn't identify with that, and he didn't identify with liking everything the "other half" of him had to give, either.
So, at the end... Kanji learns that he doesn't have to pick a "side"; that he just has to be himself, and this self... is who he is, and who he wants to be, and who he is proud to be, at a time where bisexuality wasn't spoken of.
#homophobia mention#tbd.#Maybe?#specific ooc tag.#I tried to cover this as sensitively and as precisely as I could; so hopefully it's okay.#While I do believe Atlus... were probably being homophobic tbh; I do think Kanji's struggles with his sexuality are compelling#and I think it showed well how... awful people were then [and still are to this day]; and how such things can tear you between wanting this#and wanting that. The saddest truth there is that there's LOTS of people - actual people - with a struggle similar to Kanji's#They were raised during a time where men couldn't be emotional. And women couldn't like 'boy' things.#And you were either straight or gay; either a man or a woman; there was nothing outside of that or in-between.#Thankfully we're doing away with that year by year. But I felt like with his story it was important to emphasize how it was#during the early 2010's / earlier than that.#Yada yada. I'll write now.
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so fuckin late i just found out abt the matt healy nonsense and im fuckin disassociating bro x
#decades of work by grassroots organisers just to get the extremists to look away and pay no mind to queer people#so they can just fucking live. when public canings and beatings and jail time STILL HAPPENS for being queer bc it's listed as a crime#imagine doing that shit in a country where the rec 'treatment' for being gay is conversion therapy#imagine doing that. putting that spotlight on the thousands of people who are just barely surviving by relying on living in the shadows#while they chip away at the social constraints impeding progress bit by bit. imagine doing that. saying that. and then fucking off home#and ignoring all the homophobia and transphobia in YOUR country because it doesn't matter presumably bc its Worse when its nasty brown ppl#going BACK to your own homophobic transphobic country. leaving the thousands of people left exposed by that limelight.#im not even going to touch on ''im taking your money'' and the inherently disgusting colonialist bullshit in that#expecting him to donate to local queer charities is too much when he's a piece of shit#but jfc. and all his fucking insane fans going queer malaysians who have to live w the consequences of matt's actions who complain abt that#are suffering from internalised homophobia & i have no sympathy for you#firstly. queer malaysians saying 'stop - this is not advocacy it's actively threatening us' is not internalised homophobia#secondly. explain why you have no sympathy for queer people with internalised homophobia.#like. explain. as if we weren't all questioning and struggling. as if we come out of the womb just lucky enough to Know without a doubt.#as if we dont exist in societies and families that shape us into something we're not until we can't recognise ourselves#like explain why you have no sympathy for your fellow queers and act like they're the enemy. explain why you're siding with some cishet#trash white man actively endangering brown qpoc in the THOUSANDS in a drunken fit on stage. over the qpoc actually affected by this.#explain it. go on.#fucking sickeningggg it's SICKENING#tbd
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this is me saying long before the nico book comes out that at some point it will cross either Will or Nicos mind that Will himself is the thing of equal value he has to leave behind according to the prophecy
#do i think Will will actually be left behind? no because viewer reaction#it’s essentially this books version of killing annabeth if rick does that. also risk of being called homophobic for killing off 1/2 gay coup#someone has definitely had this thought before probably but shush#if we’re lucky maybe it even crosses Wills mind to try to sacrafice himself so nico doesn’t have to realize what the prophecy’s asking for#-and then struggle with letting go of someone close to him permanently. again#idk this is j the first thing that came to mind after reading that description#pjo#hoo#pjo/hoo#nico di angelo#will solace#nico solo book#the sun and the star
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Why do people think they know more about Dream and his sexuality more than what he has said. You are not in his brain. You are not him. You are a pathetic Twitter user trying to say someone being queer doesn't mean they are 100% homosexual so therefore they can't make gay jokes.
You sound fucking delusional and if you spent half as much effort you do invalidating and erasing a person's identity and gatekeeping you might actually graduate high school
#like blow ur brains out im so fucking serious#presented with video of him genuinley talking abt his feelings on his sexuality#and saying he's not straight multiple times and you just ignore it because you don't like him so obviously he can't be queer#just bc ppl like Caitlin Jenner or sh.a.ne d.aw.son are awful horrible people does not mean they're not still lgbtq#being queer does not give you a gold star and a free pass to being a good person.#so idgaf if u think dream is literally the devil from the bible that does not take away his identity or any and all struggles he has had.#u don't get to say he will never experience homophobia WHEN U ARE LITERALLY BEING HOMOPHOBIC.#when lgbtq ppl who don't like him say he's not gay enough to be a part of the community#or when homophobes say he is too gay#THAT IS HOMOPHOBIA#IN FACT THAT'S TEXTBOOK BIPHOBIA even if he's not bisexual#go fucking kill yourself i genuinley mean it when i say the world would be better off without you#sorry guys just. so fucking angry like im seeing red.#kore.talks#negativity
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mac NEEDS to get fat again
#I feel like they’ve been struggling with what to do with mac since he started being normal abt being gay#him being a deeply repressed tradcath freak who’s insanely insecure abt everything and especially his body was basically his whole characte#now rob mcelhenney went on rich cis guy hrt to get ripped and is too scared of being homophobic to make mac weird#he barely even sexually harasses dennis anymore#he’s just like a weirdly well adjusted conventionally attractive gay man with evil friends#the only way to save him is for him to inexplicably gain 70 lbs between seasons again#give him a fresh start
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oh also i was out canvassing for the union the other day and like four different people offered to pray for me
#i didn't know how to respond bc they weren't being like.. idk homophobic or whatever they were just like. oh can i pray for anything for you#i was like 😳 umm. no we're probably fine we're mostly looking for material solidarity. can you donate $30? alsfkladjg#ok but then one of them did give me a pocket bible (new testament only. hello. so not even the good part) and was like by the way#there's an index in the beginning if there's anything in particular you're struggling with like loneliness or grief#ok?? can someone from the cincinnati northern kentucky metropolitan area explain what the vibe was because the interaction#was INCOMPREHENSIBLE to me as a damn yankee or whatever.#do i look lonely and or grieving? jewish? gay? COMMUNIST??#<- i am all of these things though i wouldn't say i'm particularly lonely hello
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People: use the recent shooting at a gay bar against other lgbtq people to try to make them shut up about 'lesser' struggles with bigotry
Me, a gay person who actually lives near the place where that fucking happened: resisting the urge to throw hands with every single one of them
#stop. using. tragic. homophobic. events. to justify. attacking. other lgbtq people.#stop using them to silence us too!!!#something awful happening does not mean people can't talk about other struggles they face for being lgbtq!!!#more than one struggle can exist and be talked about at once#and it's downright disrespectful to the people that died there to use them as a pawn for your discourse agenda#and I'm fucking sick of hearing that shit while actively fearing for my own safety because I live so close to where it happened#it makes me fucking terrified to try to go to any lgbtq spaces even more than I already was#gay#homophobia#lgbtq discourse
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I love this exchange lmao
#dare i say#me#personal#this is from the charioteer by mary renault#i think i'm enjoying it? or at least there are a lot of things that i like about it so far#but it's very slow going#it's the 50s-ness of the book that gets in my way i think#there are so many things about it that feel very modern/realistic#and i do legitimately love the portrayal of laurie's relationships with andrew and ralph#and the way they relate to the broader philisophical concept of a soul being driven by the two different horses#however i'm struggling to get fully invested because as soon as i do things start getting homophobic again#like the idea that any man who is flamboyant or 'effeminate' is somewhow lesser for it#or the idea that queerness should never be a major part of your identity and that the queer community as a concept is something to shun#not to mention that weird hierarchical idea of some gay men (i.e. artistic geniuses) being on top and others (i.e. the proudly queer)#being on the bottom#i like to think that i'm typically able to get over the more poorly aged features of old books#but in this case because there's so much that still resonates with me as a modern reader/queer person#those uglier elements just stick out all the more#mind you i'm only a bit over halfway through the book so i don't know yet how its portrayal of certain topics will resolve#also holy shit does this book love an awkward meet up#i just got to bunny's introduction and whatever else he ends up doing in the book#having a tea party with his current partner + his partner's ex + the ex's current jealous boyfriend#+ his own current partner's old flame/current crush/the guy the ex's boyfriend was jealous over#tells me he has nerves of steel
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.
#having a time so I'm here to rant about a couple things#I'd say I use Tumblr like a diary but I have an actual diary that I don't write this much info for#so like after being sick + concussed I'm doing much better now! no lingering symptoms of either anymore and I'm grateful#caught back up on my school work and I'm feeling in good standing for the rest of the semester#feeling fine thinking about the next couple semesters as well#basically this is just me establishing that I've been in a decent mental state lately. yay!#that's shifting a little. not entirely! I'm fine. just struggling with a couple things so I'm writing them out before they really affect me#I'm upset with my mom's opinions on gay people. she goes back and forth between really supportive and really homophobic comments so quickly#just the other day I was excited because she said something positive in response to seeing cars decked out in pride stuff#today she said lesbians can't have kids and expressed that she'd be disappointed if I 'chose' to be one bc 'there's expectations'#like what is that supposed to mean?????#I am gay and I want kids one day. those statements aren't contradictory to one another but I can't tell her that.#switching gears!#I have driving anxiety and hit and run OCD#basically driving makes me very anxious. I am constantly convinced that I've hit someone/something/caused an accident in some way#going over any bump or uneven road makes me feel certain I've ran someone over#I spend LOTS of time looking behind me in my mirrors to check for bodies/broken things/damaged vehicles or just to check for potholes#this causes further worry that I'll cause an accident by not paying attention to what is ahead of me#I also can't trust my memory. my brain tells me I've repressed memories of the accident I caused. this makes me confused to the point that#I no longer remember my route or even where I am. I'll assume I got off route and make panicked turns that actually get me lost#because of this I'm heavily reliant on visual markers to remind me I am on the right path. unfortunately it is fall now.#the nature on my route looks different than it did a couple weeks ago and it's throwing me off. plus there's new construction.#my usual environment has changed and now I'm back to being as nervous about my school commute as I was at the beginning of the semester#it's all just a lot#okay I'm done now. just needed to get that out before I went into a spiral#hope everyone is having a good night 🖤#ashley rambles
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it’s always been extremely weird and insulting to me when people make lucas so homophobic in their headcanons or fics... like, what in the world ever gave you the idea that he would be a bigot? please, tell me what the show has ever said or done that has given you that idea. lucas, like dustin, is another character that gets bullied specifically for something that is entirely out of his control: his race. he’s one of the few black characters on the show. he’s been repeatedly bullied, harassed, and attacked for being black. why the hell do you think he would look at will, his best friend, and bully him for something that’s also entirely out of his control, aka his sexuality? what makes you think that lucas would hate will when he’s known will for almost just as long as mike has? lucas is will’s second friend ever and considering how standoffish mike can be to newcomers and the anecdotes joyce told in season two, it wouldn’t even be a reach to say that will likely recruited lucas to their party. lucas and will love each other, support each other, and have remained the best of friends throughout the entire series, their friendship never once faltering. lucas has been shown to be kind, perceptive, and caring time and time again. why do you think that he of all people would become an aggressor? a bully? why do you think that he of all people is most likely to attack someone for the simple crime of being who they are? i know why, but just... why?
#lucas sinclair#i think of lucas who just wanted to find will lucas who didn't want to leave max out lucas who ALSO biked across town in the rain to#apologize to will and then ALSO apologized AGAIN explicitly because he wanted will to know that he regretted what he did and that will's#efforts weren't bad or uncool i think of lucas who is BEGGING his friends to PLEASE support him as he's always supported them#lucas who begs his friends to PLEASE come to his game lucas who sees that max is struggling and wants to help her in any way he can#but that never once pushes her or forces her or makes her feel bad lucas lucas lucas who has so much love and heart#and care to give to all of his loved ones because he just wants them to be safe and happy and loved#because he's black you think that he'd be a terrible person? because he's black you're willing to erase all of that and paint him as a bully#???????? what the fuck is wrong with some people in this fandom bro every time i read that it takes me right the fuck out#like are you even watching the show . i know the answer is no clearly not but like . what the FUCK#u bitches DISGUST me sometimes i swear bro#being a poc certainly does not exclude u from being homophobic but like. dustin and lucas are more likely to sympathize with#will than mike. canonically speaking. let's be fucking real. lucas got bullied for his race dustin got bullied for his disability#and will got bullied for being gay. all of these are things that you cannot help. things that you're born with. things that you can't change#what did mike get bullied for? oh. right. being a fucking nerd. big whoop.#y'all know how i feel about mike but with what has been shown to us explicitly it just makes no fucking sense and i'm tired of it#keep lucas's name out of your mouth if you're gonna disrespect him like that!!!!!!!!!#my posts#my thoughts#lucas
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still reading readymade heroine while in a defensive stance like. this is still surprisingly respectful and down to earth m/f with a gender nonconforming male lead. even the mc’s worries of ‘I don’t even know if he’s into women, he might be gay’ feels more reasonable than tokenizing or done specifically for comedic relief…?
#orlbs#misclb#I dunno it’s like#I don’t think this would ever be confirmed or a part of the manga#but it’s like. the atmosphere of a bi4bi m/f in terms of just being willing to accept certain things at face value#it’s like the only time where it’s like huh this feels like a gay way to worry about things despite being an m/f and without being annoying#y’know the whole ‘I don’t even know if the other person likes my gender’ question#but again because imo it feels like a natural line of questioning (even tho rooted in stereotypes)#it doesn’t have that aggravating self centered straight lens of ‘what if HETEROSEXUALS had to STRUGGLE like THE GAYS’ and it just feels more#normalized?#while still taking place in modern society with its stigmas etc#I don’t know how to describe it like it’s appealing (maybe even safe?) in ways m/f usually isn’t#because gender nonconformity OUTSIDE THE BOUNDS OF WHAT’S ACCEPTED is inherently framed in a sympathetic and positive light#like beyond a guy liking girly things which is still usually pretty good but still ‘safe’ within society#yknow????#basically this boils down to#even if it does inherently rely on stereotypes#this is the first time I’ve seen ‘he might be gay’ in an m/f in a way that’s 100% not homophobic#yknow???
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lol
#txt#tbd#that pers0na person came back to continue arguing with me on my 0 note untagged post . Bye!#i literally said i have no interest arguing about that#like if youre frustrated about that take make your own post theyre claiming shit about me i didnt even say#theyre also acting like the tent scene is the only one in the game that could be read as yosuke being homophobic#literally not even the one I'd been thinking of#and i dont even think yosuke is blatantly homophobic !!! its just 2009 anime humor that didnt age well!!!#and i told them this !!!#and they continued to say they felt justified being violent towards me. a stranger. because apparently i think gay ppl arent allowed to#protect themselves from abusers. WHAT ?#like. i choose to interpret him as a bisexual teenager struggling with internalised homophobia thats what the damn post was about#and honestly it was hardly even about that 90% of the post was me saying i tended to change characters in my head#which is why i dont post meta#i called yosuke homophobic in one throwaway tag and didnt clarify because i thought like 4 people would see it#jts like that twitter post where its like. ummm i misinterpreted your one sentence tweet can you apologize to me for it#leave me ALONE bro i dont know you#i dont block very often but like damn . why do you want to argue with a stranger so bad like reevaluate a little#my entire response to them was like. bro this post is old and you misunderstood what i was saying . and they doubled down#sorry for venting i literally just woke up to them reblogging it again and like. im so tired man
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