https://www.tumblr.com/lestappenforever/734223343223488512/so-many-comments-about-how-ppl-never-expected-to

This ask had me thinking about my early days . I also became an F1 fan around 2023 May-June ish . I was a Lestappen fan before i became interested in F1 tbh bcz i came to know about it through a Lestappen fanfic on Ao3 (personally i find it pretty hilarious lol) . Anyway, so i have this habit of consuming years worth of information and media related to the thing i start hyperfixating on within an extremely short period of time . I remember when i was surfing through the Lestappen tag on Tumblr for hours on end (had a lot of free time then) and coming across those crumbs . It was so little i felt extremely disappointed. I caught up with almost all Lestappen crumbs and lore within a week or so . Finished reading all the good fanfics on A03 within a month. And then i had nothing . Kept on coming back to the tag and found nothing new for so long . When i tell you it was pure agony .The Pain™ . But then fast forward to October(?) and we start getting fed whole ass Lestappen meals . Everything escalated so quickly for me lol . But for you guys even the crumbs were so far and few in between. I have so much respect for people who have been Lestappies for years bcz what were y'all even surviving on for so long 😭😭

Anyway, just wanted to share this with you. Hope you are having a good day , Mona <33 unlike ferrari

(Also why is it always Ferrari jesus)

DK putting what it was like to be a Lestappen girlie (gn) in the early days into words, despite becoming a Lestappen girlie this summer. 👆👆👆

As to what we were surviving on before we got fed Lestappen content regularly: Crumbs and unhinged imagination, babe. That's it.

Thank you very much for sharing this, DK! I love and appreciate you so much, and I hope your Friday is going wonderfully. ❤️

(Let's not even go there, because we'll be here for years.)

This is just gonna b me rambling ab the adhd real quick but

The way my hyperfixations work is that I consume any and all content related to the thing I’m fixated on at a speed of 80mph and then regurgitate it all into conversation and media analysis and art/writing. But in the case of something like fma, a series which has ended a decade ago, there is very little new content being made (relative to an ongoing series) and so, after I’ve consumed most content related to it, I’m stuck in a stagnation of waiting for new content over longer periods of time that (due to lack of immediate stimuli) makes me feel like I’m pacing around a cage like a zoo animal.

Youre probably thinking “fma is so popular, you can’t possibly run out of content that quickly.” Which, you would be correct, I obviously haven’t read every fma fic in existence. But, for the things that interest me the most (crossovers and Royai) I have. In the height of my hyperfixation I read nearly every fic in the royai tag on ao3, which is like 165 tabs worth of fic. And I’ve read every crossover that’s interested me. (To clarify I didn’t read these all at once, I’ve been in the fandom since June so it’s over a period of a couple months) so I just sit here cycling through to find something new to keep me occupied.

This kinda makes it sound like hyperfixations are a hellish thing and at times they can be (if I talk too much about them irl it annoys people, it’s a distraction irl, I lose sleep i get too hyperactive thinking ab it, etc.) but it’s honestly not entirely bad. It lets me make content im super passionate about (getting it finished is another thing entirely bc adhd go brrrrr) and is a source of instant joy for me whenever I interact with whatever the thing is. It’s that certain aspects of it can be frustrating, namely how quickly I burn through content. It feels like I’m not savoring it or whatever idk how to explain it.

There’s also the situation where after a hyperfixation leaves me, sometimes I drop it entirely and never look back which. Scares me. I don’t like it when it happens and I don’t like totally ignoring everything I’ve loved before so I always try and hold on to fixations as long as possible. Because once I get a new one it is physically impossible for me to go back to the same passion I had before and it s u c k s

i can’t modulate my excitement towards things either which makes me incredibly anxious towards interactions/talking ab fandom stuff with ppl i’m not close with about things i love. i always forget to modulate myself because i don’t want to come on too strong with whatever i’m excited about and then i look back on the interaction and feel like i’ve made them uncomfortable by being too energetic ab whatever we were talking ab and just hrrrggghhhb

Also I don’t talk in depth ab it like this to ppl who aren’t neurodivergent bc of the rift in understanding (when I tried to explain it to my mom she just told me to “stop watching what you hyperfixate on then” when that’s. Not how it works. And I have fixated on shows I’ve never watched before) and also because the explanation makes it seem .. obsessive.. instead of what it actually is which. Embarasses me. So I’m probably going to regret this ramble later on but I kinda just needed to rant into the void and explain it to nothing real quick.