#batman rip checklist
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There were a few things almost all the Bats had. Some even called them the requirements to be a Gotham vigilante. Tim is a person who likes upholding traditions. If something is repeated several times, it’s probably repeated for a reason. That was why he had created a checklist with the bat standards before volunteering himself as Robin.
Black hair: check
Blue eyes: check
Orphan: …well Tim’s mother had died in childbirth and he never met his dad’s on again off again girlfriend so he guessed that was a half check
Penchant for running into danger: Check. Tim’s life was inherently dangerous.
Daddy issues:
Tim looked up from his notebook at the wanted posters covering the walls of various buildings. He walked closer and read one of them.
WANTED: THE JOKER FOR MASS MURDER, DOMESTIC TERRORISM, KIDNAPPING, AND ARSON
Tim ripped the poster off the wall and stuffed it into his bag.
Check.
——————
An AU where Tim Drake grew up as the Joker’s secret weapon, his biological son. Tim became obsessed with Batman and Robin so his father killed Jason as punishment. Tim ran away and decided to become Robin while ignoring the loyalty and love he still has for his father.
#tim drake#tim drake robin#batfam fic prompt#fic prompt#tim drake is joker junior#jackson timothy “jj” drake junior au#the joker#dc comics#batfam#batfamily#joker junior
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Checklist (brutalscaled~)
Send “checklist” and my muse will fill out the list below with their thoughts about yours!
"Got a job you might be interested in, Croc. It's quick, easy and all that's required are a few minutes of your maritime talents..."
I find you to be:
[X] interesting (By far one of the most interesting people I know)
[X] cute (Not derogatory)
[X] attractive (I always like watching you work)
[ ] sexy
[X] reassuring (Reassuring like having a grenade launcher onhand)
[X] intimidating (to others, you're a godsend when I need quick answers/results from these morons)
[ ] annoying (No?)
[ ] tedious (Again, no)
[ ] terrifying (I guess I wouldn't want to be on the wrong side of those jaws but it's impressive watching them work)
I think we should:
[X] talk more (Always good hearing your thoughts on things)
[X] hang out more (I can trust you when shit needs getting done)
[X] date (Date more like planning how we're gonna strike that incoming shipment before it hits the docks)
[X] adopt each other as found family (You can be my brother anyday)
[X] fight (friendly)
[ ] fight (hostile)
[ ] avoid each other if at all possible
If we spent an evening together we would:
[X] just hang out (You know you're always welcome to come chill or whatever)
[X] talk about deep stuff (We can shoot the shit over a bottle of whiskey or two, yeah)
[ ] cuddle
[X] go to bed together (to sleep)
[ ] go to bed together (to… not sleep)
[X] go out and party till sunrise (by party you and I both know that's a lie :)
[X] both get arrested (Fucking Batman always finds a way to spoil our fun)
[ ] probably wind up killing each other (Nah we get along p good)
If we kissed it would be:
[ ] a chaste press of lips
[ ] a playful smooch
[ ] swift and stolen
[ ] deep, sweet, and sincerely meant
[ ] all teeth and tongue and hot as heck
[X] not happening
[X] it's not because I don't like you, it's because you and I both have lip issues
If we had sex it would be:
[ ] romantic and luxurious
[ ] fast, rough and hard
[ ] against the nearest wall
[ ] fantastic
[X] awkward (We've known each other since we were kids so it's kinda awkward yeah...)
[X] a really bad idea (I can handle pain but even this might be too much to handle?)
[X] an all-around disaster (Can't see it turning out any other way RIP)
[X] not happening
If I woke up and found you unexpectedly in my bed I would:
[ ] cuddle you (Being asleep doesn't count)
[X] offer you breakfast (Cooked or 'leftovers' from last night?)
[ ] attempt to seduce you
[ ] kick you out (No you can stay)
[ ] demand to know how you got there (I'd wonder how you got in without waking me tbh)
[ ] scream
[X] not question it
[X] go back to sleep (I know I'm safe here with you)
#brutalscaled#memes ;; checklist#And with that I'm getting ready for work!#Thank you for sending one in btw it's always a hoot interacting with Croc!#Pretty good relationship these two have got ^^#Nothing toxic or out of the ordinary#Other than eating last night's torture subjects#They might still be clinging to life so still fresh lmao
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you know that one Batman Beyond episode where a supervillain tries to convince Bruce that he's hearing voices and he reveals that he knew the voice was fake because it kept calling him "Bruce" and in his head he calls himself Batman? consider: similar situation with Hawks
okay okay okay okay okay i’m a huge batman nerd you know how to get to me....
Mini-fic under the readmore
tw: depression, suicidal thoughts
“Takami-san, are you listening?”
He blinks and grins. “Yeah, hah! Sorry, just a little tired. And, please, call me Hawks.”
The doctor nods and smiles at him, then makes a mark on her clipboard. She lowers her head as she does, and her bangs fall over her face, breaking their eye contact.
Leave, says his brain. Don’t burden her, the guilt is yours. He ignores it.
“Would you please explain your concerns to me?”
You shouldn’t be here, says his stupid brain. This is a you problem, remember. It’s not anyone else’s fault you’re useless without your wings. Don’t bother the doctor with this; it’s not depression, not a medical issue. You’ve just outlived your use and you know it.
“I think I’m depressed,” he admits. “It’s been hard, with everything, but it just kind of hit me this week.” He’s smiling, he makes sure of it, but it’s a tired and self-deprecating smile. He runs a hand through his hair, and his fingers snag on the snarls he didn’t comb out that morning. Without flying in the wind to blow his hair back and out of his face, he cut it, but it’s still long enough to tangle.
“Okay,” says the doctor with a sad smile of her own. “I’m gonna go through a checklist with you now. Have you lost or gained any weight?”
“Ah, well. My wings were pretty heavy. I’m not really sure, since that can kind of account for any change.”
“Okay. Have you experienced loss of appetite?”
“Well, yeah, but again, my wings. I don’t need to fuel them anymore.”
The doctor notes the answer on her clipboard, and Hawks, too used people taking notes on him, rips his eyes away and forces himself to straighten his shoulders. She’s marking his answers to the checklist, it’s fine. She’s not marking his performance, how useless he is without his wings, and even if she were, he shouldn’t fold in on himself, he should look big and confident.
She could be, says the voice. You never know with the Commission. I wouldn’t put it past them to plant an agent for your doctor. And that iron-on confidence isn’t fooling anyone.
He wants to shrink from himself. He wants to curl himself around his heart—maybe that way he can hold the poison in instead of letting it spread through his whole body, to his brain.
“Have you been having thoughts that it would be better to not exist? Or to not wake up one day?
Tell her no. She’s asking if you’ve been suicidal. It’s the voice again. I have, though, Hawks says back to himself. But then, it’s not the kind she’s thinking of, though. She’s asking about unjustified thoughts. You know full well that you actually have a reason. She’s used to dealing with people that are actually depressed. Like the medical condition. You’ve just outlived your purpose. Unlike actual depressed people, there’s no reason for you to live.
He drags himself up and out of his thoughts, forces his eyes to focus again. When he looks at the doctor again, she smiles encouragingly. He chokes. He can’t. He can’t tell her. Unlike her other patients, he’s right when he thinks them.
He shakes his head, and they finish out the questions. He answers no to the plan for suicide, even though he can’t stop thinking of sending a text to Endeavor and stepping off the roof the top floor of his agency. He answers no to feeling guilty.
Unlike people who are actually depressed, you have a real reason to feel guilty. You think someone who caused the heroes’ failure and someone who killed a good man wouldn’t deserve this guilt?
Has he been feeling sad for no reason? No, he has a reason. He deserves this.
In the end, he leaves feeling worse than before. It takes a monumental effort just to lift his foot off the ground with each step. Did he really used to run and fly? Was he really the man they called too fast for his own good? It’s like he’s walking through syrup in slow motion, and only his eyes can move at normal speed. They catch everyone’s accusing looks as he walks by them out of the hospital.
Up the stairs, the voice tells him—or, well. It’s what he tells himself, since the voice is him. There are more roofs out there than just your agency.
He can’t tell if it’s restlessness or panic clawing at him from the inside, but either way, he stops right in front of the door to the roof.
Well, go on!
He doesn’t want to this from a hospital, what if there’s a kid looking out the window? No, this needs to be more private.
Hello? Up the stairs!
And he can’t forget the text to Endeavor. He pulls out his phone and stares blankly at the messages screen. His fingers are too slow, he can’t move them.
You deserve this. You deserve to die. Up the stairs.
He’s frozen still.
Keigo! shouts the voice, and he startles. Chop, chop!
That voice is not him.
“Please, call me Hawks,” he tells the voice politely, then turns around and strides purposefully back the way he came.
“Can we try that again?” he asks the doctor. “I wasn’t being completely honest with you.”
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OOOKay the thought with this one is that hawks actually is depressed. but there’s also someone’s quirk talking to him and adding to that. i don’t want it to seem like all of the problems are from the voice. and i wasn’t sure what parts to give the voice bc your actual brain will tell you those things if you’re depressed. but i hope it doesn’t seem insensitive, this thought just wouldn’t leave my head
#asks#not sure what to call this....#fic#?#mini fic#hm sorry it’s a little heavy but I did try to end it on a hopeful note#hawks#bnha
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One thing is for sure - 'Joker' doesn't have beams coming out of the sky (or going into the sky), there is no over-the-top CGI sensory-overloaded climax, and there is no Batman in sight (but there is a brief scene (or two) with an young Bruce Wayne).
It was a weird movie-going experience. The 7 pm screening was packed - and everyone was in-tuned for a very dark and gritty (R rated) origin story about a well-known comic book villain. The film stumbles (and trips) upon cliches and tropes about the mentally ill/crazy person checklist (which I expected from the director of 'The Hangover' films), but was pleasantly surprised to see how a mainstream comic book movie under the WB/DC banner is disguised as a character study/art-house film (and obvious homage to 'Taxi Driver.')
The film is not great (sorry). But the third act is near-perfect, which elevates everything in the film to where/why there is hype for it. Bravo to Joaquin Phoenix for his commitment to the Oscar-worthy role. Bravo to Todd Phillips for directing a film that tops (spoiler alert) the amount of close-up shots of Joaquin Phoenix's face of all time. And bravo to Warner Brothers for making a film outside its 'WE ARE DESPERATELY RIPPING OFF MARVEL'S MODEL' DC 'verse.
I beg you - MORE FILMS LIKE THIS. Less films like headache inducing 'Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice,' PLEASE!
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Quick Write Up The Outer Worlds Summary, you're unknown colonies from the colony Hope. You just woke up from cryo-sleep to find that most of the passengers are still in hibernation and begin a journey to the unknown solar system. Good: The writing is very strong. Acting is top-notch. RPG mechanics are very good. The music is nice, but I don't remember anything noteworthy, but it gets the job done. The game is very beautiful. Bad The enemy AI is very stupid. Sadly your companions die in a quick fashion. Their only good at meeting pacific dialogue checklist. The companion's personal quest is very forgettable. The loading time between traveling to different planets and or rooms isn't bad. However, you'll find them very annoying at times goes by. The game doesn't have any throw able weapons like a hand grenade. The game isn't all that hard, but the upping the game's difficulty won't add much in my book. The enemies become sponge-like in normal settings. Melee combat doesn't feel right. Also, the science weapons are all trash. They don't do much damage unless you have high science/ Gloop Gun The game is well optimize on PC. However, I would recommend PC gamers who doesn't have a powerful GPU. Go with home console like PS4 and or Xbox One. Overall: High Matinee El Camino Summary, El Camino is continuation of the hit series Breaking Bad. Jesse Pinkman played by Aaron Paul. Jesse is on the move to start a new life while avoiding the police. Good * Aaron Paul is a stupid great actor. Jesse goes through the many stages of a free person. Jesse is a clever escape artist along with a good person at heart. Jesse is a smart chameleon and the last act of the film does the character justice. * The supporting characters from BB play a role, by they flush out the main story to believable one. Jesse's parents were a big character moment and you can Jesse pain of lying to his family. * The flashbacks are fucking amazing. We revisit with BB cast, but the flashbacks help explain why Jesse does the things he does. * Jesse Plemons as Todd Alquist, one of the members of the neo-Nazi group. Todd the character is fucking awesome. The way Todd can very nice, but can kill a person at any moment. I love this character and the actor. * This is by far the most beautiful film Netflix has ever produced. The landscape of the trailer park hood to the abandoned apartment. You get the feeling that someone uses to live there. Alaska wildlife is spotless good. * The score is awesome which isn't new already. You can hear BB many song samples. * Robert Forster last film and the man delivers. RIP to Mr. Forster. Bad * The big bad of the film is forgettable. I didn't hate them. They felt weak compared to the rest of the BB rouges gallery. Overall: High Full Price Joker Summary, Arthur a very ill person who just wants to make the world laugh. However, Arthur finally found his true calling in life, and the people of Gotham have been waiting for. Good: * Phoenix is making amazing actors because. Phoenix as the Joker is very enjoyable, interesting, and you wanna see more. *The look of Gotham in the 1980s is beautiful. * The score which is mostly classical music. Bad: * The supporting characters are forgettable and wasted in my book. * The story is decent, but it's awful overall. * This issue of mental health in done poorly. * The Batman characters were stupid distraction. Overall: Full Price (Low) Ratings: Fuck You (Bullshit City) Some Ole Bullshit (Boring as Hell) Rental (Meh) Matinée (Sigh Okay) Full Price (Badass Son) Better Than Sex (Must Watch) Petition - Wolf PAC https://ift.tt/KjT0Tr Erik's YouTube channel, Facebook, Twitter, Blog site, and G+ page http://www.youtube.com/user/erikbarrett https://ift.tt/2k2pKhW https://twitter.com/erikbarrett https://ift.tt/2klH9P0 OhSoEccentricBeing: Youtube channel/Tumblr page https://www.youtube.com/user/OhSoEccentricBeing https://ift.tt/2k2mNOF Spartantown: https://ift.tt/1n46xW0 My Twitter: https://twitter.com/Magnetorullz Blog site https://ift.tt/2YLNE0U Movie Spoilers: moviespoilerspodcast.blogspot.com/ Finally my personal page https://ift.tt/2Q9IhFi by Izzy Meh-Zone
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Twenty Enjoyable And Also Interesting Realities. About Austin, Texas
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Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.
“Why is my eye twitching?!”
It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.
It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.
And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:
“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.
“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!
“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”
They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.
Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!
Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.
What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. To salsa music. While setting off fireworks.
The days where this happens are shitty.
And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.
I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!
I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.
And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.
At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”
I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.
In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:
“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.
Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.
These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.
And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!
#1) GET AN EARLY WIN
For me, the best early win? Making my bed.
When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.
I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.
Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.
WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.
Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”
Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!
If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!
#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX
At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.
Wait, that came out wrong.
Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”
But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.
And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.
Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:
So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.
Oh, and the big one:
I floss.
Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”
RIP Mitch.
But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”
I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.
That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.
WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.
Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.
#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO
I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.
Mostly hate.
Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.
So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.
It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.
So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:
youtube
WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.
Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.
#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL
When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.
Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.
Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.
So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?
Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:
10 push-ups
10 lunges
10-minute walk
I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”
This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.
WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.
Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.
If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.
#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING
There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.
It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.
I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:
Busy is a choice.
It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.
And then I do three things:
Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.
Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.
Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.
Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.
Progress and momentum for the win!
Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”
Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”
As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.
WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.
And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.
No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.
It took 2 freakin’ minutes.
This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!
#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!
The past: I can’t change it!
The future: It hasn’t happened yet!
Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.
This is suboptimal.
So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”
(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)
Cool? Cool.
5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.
I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.
But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.
WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.
#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE
Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:
I consumed more than I created.
For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.
The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.
So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.
I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:
Television
Video games
Social media
Outrage news stories
Takeout
Books
In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.
If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.
I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.
JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.
And that means less consumption, more production and creation!
Writing and creating content, like this article
Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)
Cooking my own meal at home
Creating art, doodling, drawing
Creating conversation with friends
WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.
Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!
#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT
When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.
It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”
And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!
So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:
I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.
I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).
I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.
I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!
I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.
I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”
We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide to Mental Health, and if this is something you’re interested in please consider it!
Note: if you really struggle with depression/anxiety, speaking with a mental health professional could be a game-changing experience. Please do so as soon as you can!
WHY THIS WORKS: I used to be afraid to ask for help, assuming I had to know all the answers on my own. Or that people relied on me to be the happy-go-lucky person and I wasn’t allowed to be unhappy or stressed. And then I grew up.
Now I have no problem asking for help, saying “I don’t know” even if it makes me feel foolish, and I get to a solution MUCH faster!
I know with everything being online these days, it’s easy to spend a lot of time being friendly but not having actual deep conversations with people. This is something I have to work really hard on, as I’d much rather sit at home alone with a book all day and avoid people.
And yet, in most instances, when I’m with friends or loved ones, my day gets much better as a result. And thus, I prioritize saying YES. (Just not too much, so we don’t overload Future Steve.)
Overwhelmed? Do these 8 Things
Okay! This is my 8-step kickstart kickass strategy to dealing with overwhelm and anxiety.
Feel free to hijack these 8 things and the next time you’re feeling overwhelmed, take these steps to get unstuck and back on track:
Get an early win
Quick hygiene fix
Watch a 5-minute motivational video
Do the 10-10-10 Protocol
Do the Very Next Thing
Breathe, idiot!
Consume less, produce more
Ask for help
Break this list in case of emergency! Write these down, print it out, design your own checklist and share it with me so I can add it here to the post, whatever you want to do!
You can do this!
I’d love to hear from you: how do you manage overwhelm, and what are the steps you take to get out of that mental quicksand?!
Leave a comment below!
-Steve
PS: This week’s Rebel Hero: Nick T: rocking his new NF Battle Gear!
I can only assume he worked out so hard and flexed so perfectly that he blew the sleeves right off of it 🙂 Nick has been a super supportive member of our community for years and I’m damn glad he’s here.
Want to be the next Rebel Hero? Take a photo of you doing something epic in your NF battle gear, tag us on Instagram with #NerdFitness #battlegear, or email us at [email protected]!
PHOTO SOURCES: All amazing LEGO photos are from Black Zack, whose photos are here on Flickr.
Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck. published first on https://dietariouspage.tumblr.com/
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Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.
“Why is my eye twitching?!”
It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.
It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.
And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:
“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.
“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!
“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”
They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.
Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!
Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.
What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. Out of rhythm. While setting off fireworks.
The days where this happens are shitty.
And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.
I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!
I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.
And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.
At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”
I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.
In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:
“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.
Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.
These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.
And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!
#1) GET AN EARLY WIN
For me, the best early win? Making my bed.
When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.
I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.
Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.
WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.
Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”
Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!
If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!
#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX
At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.
Wait, that came out wrong.
Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”
But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.
And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.
Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:
So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.
Oh, and the big one:
I floss.
Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”
RIP Mitch.
But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”
I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.
That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.
WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.
Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.
#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO
I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.
Mostly hate.
Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.
So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.
It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.
So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:
youtube
WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.
Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.
#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL
When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.
Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.
Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.
So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?
Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:
10 push-ups
10 lunges
10-minute walk
I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”
This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.
WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.
Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.
If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.
#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING
There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.
It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.
I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:
Busy is a choice.
It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.
And then I do three things:
Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.
Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.
Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.
Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.
Progress and momentum for the win!
Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”
Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”
As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.
WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.
And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.
No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.
It took 2 freakin’ minutes.
This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!
#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!
The past: I can’t change it!
The future: It hasn’t happened yet!
Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.
This is suboptimal.
So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”
(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)
Cool? Cool.
5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.
I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.
But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.
WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.
#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE
Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:
I consumed more than I created.
For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.
The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.
So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.
I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:
Television
Video games
Social media
Outrage news stories
Takeout
Books
In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.
If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.
I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.
JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.
And that means less consumption, more production and creation!
Writing and creating content, like this article
Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)
Cooking my own meal at home
Creating art, doodling, drawing
Creating conversation with friends
WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.
Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!
#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT
When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.
It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”
And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!
So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:
I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.
I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).
I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.
I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!
I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.
I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”
We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide..
https://ift.tt/2GBwV7u
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Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.
“Why is my eye twitching?!”
It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.
It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.
And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:
“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.
“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!
“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”
They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.
Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!
Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.
What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. Out of rhythm. While setting off fireworks.
The days where this happens are shitty.
And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.
I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!
I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.
And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.
At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”
I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.
In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:
“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.
Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.
These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.
And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!
#1) GET AN EARLY WIN
For me, the best early win? Making my bed.
When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.
I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.
Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.
WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.
Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”
Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!
If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!
#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX
At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.
Wait, that came out wrong.
Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”
But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.
And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.
Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:
So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.
Oh, and the big one:
I floss.
Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”
RIP Mitch.
But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”
I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.
That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.
WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.
Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.
#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO
I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.
Mostly hate.
Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.
So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.
It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.
So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:
youtube
WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.
Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.
#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL
When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.
Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.
Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.
So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?
Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:
10 push-ups
10 lunges
10-minute walk
I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”
This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.
WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.
Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.
If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.
#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING
There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.
It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.
I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:
Busy is a choice.
It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.
And then I do three things:
Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.
Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.
Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.
Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.
Progress and momentum for the win!
Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”
Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”
As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.
WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.
And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.
No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.
It took 2 freakin’ minutes.
This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!
#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!
The past: I can’t change it!
The future: It hasn’t happened yet!
Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.
This is suboptimal.
So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”
(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)
Cool? Cool.
5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.
I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.
But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.
WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.
#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE
Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:
I consumed more than I created.
For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.
The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.
So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.
I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:
Television
Video games
Social media
Outrage news stories
Takeout
Books
In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.
If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.
I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.
JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.
And that means less consumption, more production and creation!
Writing and creating content, like this article
Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)
Cooking my own meal at home
Creating art, doodling, drawing
Creating conversation with friends
WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.
Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!
#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT
When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.
It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”
And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!
So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:
I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.
I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).
I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.
I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!
I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.
I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”
We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide..
https://ift.tt/2GBwV7u
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Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.
“Why is my eye twitching?!”
It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.
It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.
And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:
“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.
“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!
“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”
They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.
Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!
Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.
What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. Out of rhythm. While setting off fireworks.
The days where this happens are shitty.
And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.
I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!
I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.
And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.
At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”
I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.
In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:
“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.
Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.
These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.
And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!
#1) GET AN EARLY WIN
For me, the best early win? Making my bed.
When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.
I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.
Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.
WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.
Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”
Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!
If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!
#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX
At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.
Wait, that came out wrong.
Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”
But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.
And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.
Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:
So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.
Oh, and the big one:
I floss.
Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”
RIP Mitch.
But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”
I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.
That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.
WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.
Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.
#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO
I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.
Mostly hate.
Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.
So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.
It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.
So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:
youtube
WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.
Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.
#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL
When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.
Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.
Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.
So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?
Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:
10 push-ups
10 lunges
10-minute walk
I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”
This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.
WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.
Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.
If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.
#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING
There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.
It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.
I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:
Busy is a choice.
It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.
And then I do three things:
Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.
Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.
Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.
Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.
Progress and momentum for the win!
Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”
Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”
As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.
WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.
And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.
No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.
It took 2 freakin’ minutes.
This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!
#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!
The past: I can’t change it!
The future: It hasn’t happened yet!
Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.
This is suboptimal.
So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”
(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)
Cool? Cool.
5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.
I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.
But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.
WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.
#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE
Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:
I consumed more than I created.
For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.
The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.
So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.
I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:
Television
Video games
Social media
Outrage news stories
Takeout
Books
In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.
If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.
I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.
JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.
And that means less consumption, more production and creation!
Writing and creating content, like this article
Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)
Cooking my own meal at home
Creating art, doodling, drawing
Creating conversation with friends
WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.
Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!
#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT
When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.
It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”
And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!
So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:
I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.
I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).
I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.
I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!
I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.
I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”
We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide..
https://ift.tt/2GBwV7u
0 notes
Text
Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.
“Why is my eye twitching?!”
It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.
It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.
And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:
“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.
“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!
“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”
They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.
Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!
Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.
What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. Out of rhythm. While setting off fireworks.
The days where this happens are shitty.
And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.
I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!
I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.
And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.
At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”
I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.
In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:
“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.
Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.
These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.
And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!
#1) GET AN EARLY WIN
For me, the best early win? Making my bed.
When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.
I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.
Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.
WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.
Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”
Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!
If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!
#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX
At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.
Wait, that came out wrong.
Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”
But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.
And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.
Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:
So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.
Oh, and the big one:
I floss.
Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”
RIP Mitch.
But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”
I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.
That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.
WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.
Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.
#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO
I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.
Mostly hate.
Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.
So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.
It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.
So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:
youtube
WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.
Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.
#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL
When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.
Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.
Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.
So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?
Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:
10 push-ups
10 lunges
10-minute walk
I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”
This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.
WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.
Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.
If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.
#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING
There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.
It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.
I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:
Busy is a choice.
It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.
And then I do three things:
Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.
Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.
Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.
Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.
Progress and momentum for the win!
Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”
Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”
As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.
WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.
And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.
No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.
It took 2 freakin’ minutes.
This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!
#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!
The past: I can’t change it!
The future: It hasn’t happened yet!
Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.
This is suboptimal.
So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”
(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)
Cool? Cool.
5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.
I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.
But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.
WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.
#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE
Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:
I consumed more than I created.
For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.
The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.
So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.
I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:
Television
Video games
Social media
Outrage news stories
Takeout
Books
In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.
If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.
I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.
JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.
And that means less consumption, more production and creation!
Writing and creating content, like this article
Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)
Cooking my own meal at home
Creating art, doodling, drawing
Creating conversation with friends
WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.
Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!
#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT
When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.
It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”
And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!
So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:
I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.
I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).
I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.
I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!
I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.
I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”
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Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.
“Why is my eye twitching?!”
It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.
It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.
And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:
“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.
“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!
“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”
They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.
Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!
Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.
What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. To salsa music. While setting off fireworks.
The days where this happens are shitty.
And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.
I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!
I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.
And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.
At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”
I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.
In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:
“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.
Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.
These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.
And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!
#1) GET AN EARLY WIN
For me, the best early win? Making my bed.
When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.
I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.
Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.
WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.
Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”
Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!
If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!
#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX
At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.
Wait, that came out wrong.
Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”
But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.
And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.
Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:
So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.
Oh, and the big one:
I floss.
Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”
RIP Mitch.
But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”
I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.
That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.
WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.
Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.
#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO
I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.
Mostly hate.
Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.
So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.
It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.
So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:
youtube
WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.
Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.
#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL
When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.
Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.
Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.
So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?
Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:
10 push-ups
10 lunges
10-minute walk
I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”
This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.
WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.
Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.
If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.
#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING
There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.
It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.
I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:
Busy is a choice.
It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.
And then I do three things:
Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.
Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.
Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.
Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.
Progress and momentum for the win!
Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”
Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”
As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.
WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.
And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.
No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.
It took 2 freakin’ minutes.
This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!
#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!
The past: I can’t change it!
The future: It hasn’t happened yet!
Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.
This is suboptimal.
So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”
(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)
Cool? Cool.
5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.
I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.
But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.
WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.
#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE
Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:
I consumed more than I created.
For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.
The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.
So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.
I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:
Television
Video games
Social media
Outrage news stories
Takeout
Books
In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.
If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.
I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.
JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.
And that means less consumption, more production and creation!
Writing and creating content, like this article
Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)
Cooking my own meal at home
Creating art, doodling, drawing
Creating conversation with friends
WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.
Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!
#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT
When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.
It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”
And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!
So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:
I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.
I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).
I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.
I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!
I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.
I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”
We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide to Mental Health, and if this is something you’re interested in please consider it!
Note: if you really struggle with depression/anxiety, speaking with a mental health professional could be a game-changing experience. Please do so as soon as you can!
WHY THIS WORKS: I used to be afraid to ask for help, assuming I had to know all the answers on my own. Or that people relied on me to be the happy-go-lucky person and I wasn’t allowed to be unhappy or stressed. And then I grew up.
Now I have no problem asking for help, saying “I don’t know” even if it makes me feel foolish, and I get to a solution MUCH faster!
I know with everything being online these days, it’s easy to spend a lot of time being friendly but not having actual deep conversations with people. This is something I have to work really hard on, as I’d much rather sit at home alone with a book all day and avoid people.
And yet, in most instances, when I’m with friends or loved ones, my day gets much better as a result. And thus, I prioritize saying YES. (Just not too much, so we don’t overload Future Steve.)
Overwhelmed? Do these 8 Things
Okay! This is my 8-step kickstart kickass strategy to dealing with overwhelm and anxiety.
Feel free to hijack these 8 things and the next time you’re feeling overwhelmed, take these steps to get unstuck and back on track:
Get an early win
Quick hygiene fix
Watch a 5-minute motivational video
Do the 10-10-10 Protocol
Do the Very Next Thing
Breathe, idiot!
Consume less, produce more
Ask for help
Break this list in case of emergency! Write these down, print it out, design your own checklist and share it with me so I can add it here to the post, whatever you want to do!
You can do this!
I’d love to hear from you: how do you manage overwhelm, and what are the steps you take to get out of that mental quicksand?!
Leave a comment below!
-Steve
PS: This week’s Rebel Hero: Nick T: rocking his new NF Battle Gear!
I can only assume he worked out so hard and flexed so perfectly that he blew the sleeves right off of it 🙂 Nick has been a super supportive member of our community for years and I’m damn glad he’s here.
Want to be the next Rebel Hero? Take a photo of you doing something epic in your NF battle gear, tag us on Instagram with #NerdFitness #battlegear, or email us at [email protected]!
PHOTO SOURCES: All amazing LEGO photos are from Black Zack, whose photos are here on Flickr.
from Fitness News By James https://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/overwhelmed-anxious-how-to-get-unstuck/
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Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.
“Why is my eye twitching?!”
It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.
It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.
And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:
“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.
“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!
“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”
They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.
Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!
Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.
What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. Out of rhythm. While setting off fireworks.
The days where this happens are shitty.
And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.
I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!
I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.
And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.
At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”
I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.
In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:
“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.
Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.
These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.
And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!
#1) GET AN EARLY WIN
For me, the best early win? Making my bed.
When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.
I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.
Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.
WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.
Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”
Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!
If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!
#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX
At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.
Wait, that came out wrong.
Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”
But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.
And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.
Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:
So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.
Oh, and the big one:
I floss.
Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”
RIP Mitch.
But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”
I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.
That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.
WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.
Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.
#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO
I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.
Mostly hate.
Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.
So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.
It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.
So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:
youtube
WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.
Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.
#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL
When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.
Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.
Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.
So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?
Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:
10 push-ups
10 lunges
10-minute walk
I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”
This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.
WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.
Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.
If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.
#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING
There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.
It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.
I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:
Busy is a choice.
It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.
And then I do three things:
Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.
Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.
Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.
Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.
Progress and momentum for the win!
Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”
Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”
As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.
WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.
And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.
No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.
It took 2 freakin’ minutes.
This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!
#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!
The past: I can’t change it!
The future: It hasn’t happened yet!
Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.
This is suboptimal.
So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”
(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)
Cool? Cool.
5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.
I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.
But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.
WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.
#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE
Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:
I consumed more than I created.
For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.
The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.
So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.
I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:
Television
Video games
Social media
Outrage news stories
Takeout
Books
In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.
If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.
I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.
JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.
And that means less consumption, more production and creation!
Writing and creating content, like this article
Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)
Cooking my own meal at home
Creating art, doodling, drawing
Creating conversation with friends
WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.
Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!
#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT
When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.
It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”
And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!
So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:
I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.
I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).
I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.
I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!
I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.
I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”
We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide to Mental Health, and if this is something you’re interested in please consider it!
Note: if you really struggle with depression/anxiety, speaking with a mental health professional could be a game-changing experience. Please do so as soon as you can!
WHY THIS WORKS: I used to be afraid to ask for help, assuming I had to know all the answers on my own. Or that people relied on me to be the happy-go-lucky person and I wasn’t allowed to be unhappy or stressed. And then I grew up.
Now I have no problem asking for help, saying “I don’t know” even if it makes me feel foolish, and I get to a solution MUCH faster!
I know with everything being online these days, it’s easy to spend a lot of time being friendly but not having actual deep conversations with people. This is something I have to work really hard on, as I’d much rather sit at home alone with a book all day and avoid people.
And yet, in most instances, when I’m with friends or loved ones, my day gets much better as a result. And thus, I prioritize saying YES. (Just not too much, so we don’t overload Future Steve.)
Overwhelmed? Do these 8 Things
Okay! This is my 8-step kickstart kickass strategy to dealing with overwhelm and anxiety.
Feel free to hijack these 8 things and the next time you’re feeling overwhelmed, take these steps to get unstuck and back on track:
Get an early win
Quick hygiene fix
Watch a 5-minute motivational video
Do the 10-10-10 Protocol
Do the Very Next Thing
Breathe, idiot!
Consume less, produce more
Ask for help
Break this list in case of emergency! Write these down, print it out, design your own checklist and share it with me so I can add it here to the post, whatever you want to do!
You can do this!
I’d love to hear from you: how do you manage overwhelm, and what are the steps you take to get out of that mental quicksand?!
Leave a comment below!
-Steve
PS: This week’s Rebel Hero: Nick T: rocking his new NF Battle Gear!
I can only assume he worked out so hard and flexed so perfectly that he blew the sleeves right off of it 🙂 Nick has been a super supportive member of our community for years and I’m damn glad he’s here.
Want to be the next Rebel Hero? Take a photo of you doing something epic in your NF battle gear, tag us on Instagram with #NerdFitness #battlegear, or email us at [email protected]!
PHOTO SOURCES: All amazing LEGO photos are from Black Zack, whose photos are here on Flickr.
Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck. published first on http://fitnetpro.tumblr.com/
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Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.
“Why is my eye twitching?!”
It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.
It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.
And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:
“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.
“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!
“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”
They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.
Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!
Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.
What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. To salsa music. While setting off fireworks.
The days where this happens are shitty.
And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.
I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!
I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.
And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.
At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”
I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.
In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:
“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.
Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.
These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.
And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!
#1) GET AN EARLY WIN
For me, the best early win? Making my bed.
When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.
I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.
Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.
WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.
Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”
Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!
If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!
#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX
At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.
Wait, that came out wrong.
Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”
But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.
And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.
Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:
So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.
Oh, and the big one:
I floss.
Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”
RIP Mitch.
But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”
I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.
That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.
WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.
Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.
#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO
I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.
Mostly hate.
Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.
So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.
It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.
So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:
youtube
WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.
Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.
#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL
When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.
Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.
Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.
So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?
Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:
10 push-ups
10 lunges
10-minute walk
I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”
This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.
WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.
Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.
If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.
#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING
There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.
It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.
I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:
Busy is a choice.
It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.
And then I do three things:
Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.
Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.
Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.
Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.
Progress and momentum for the win!
Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”
Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”
As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.
WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.
And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.
No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.
It took 2 freakin’ minutes.
This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!
#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!
The past: I can’t change it!
The future: It hasn’t happened yet!
Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.
This is suboptimal.
So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”
(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)
Cool? Cool.
5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.
I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.
But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.
WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.
#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE
Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:
I consumed more than I created.
For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.
The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.
So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.
I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:
Television
Video games
Social media
Outrage news stories
Takeout
Books
In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.
If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.
I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.
JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.
And that means less consumption, more production and creation!
Writing and creating content, like this article
Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)
Cooking my own meal at home
Creating art, doodling, drawing
Creating conversation with friends
WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.
Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!
#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT
When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.
It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”
And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!
So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:
I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.
I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).
I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.
I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!
I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.
I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”
We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide to Mental Health, and if this is something you’re interested in please consider it!
Note: if you really struggle with depression/anxiety, speaking with a mental health professional could be a game-changing experience. Please do so as soon as you can!
WHY THIS WORKS: I used to be afraid to ask for help, assuming I had to know all the answers on my own. Or that people relied on me to be the happy-go-lucky person and I wasn’t allowed to be unhappy or stressed. And then I grew up.
Now I have no problem asking for help, saying “I don’t know” even if it makes me feel foolish, and I get to a solution MUCH faster!
I know with everything being online these days, it’s easy to spend a lot of time being friendly but not having actual deep conversations with people. This is something I have to work really hard on, as I’d much rather sit at home alone with a book all day and avoid people.
And yet, in most instances, when I’m with friends or loved ones, my day gets much better as a result. And thus, I prioritize saying YES. (Just not too much, so we don’t overload Future Steve.)
Overwhelmed? Do these 8 Things
Okay! This is my 8-step kickstart kickass strategy to dealing with overwhelm and anxiety.
Feel free to hijack these 8 things and the next time you’re feeling overwhelmed, take these steps to get unstuck and back on track:
Get an early win
Quick hygiene fix
Watch a 5-minute motivational video
Do the 10-10-10 Protocol
Do the Very Next Thing
Breathe, idiot!
Consume less, produce more
Ask for help
Break this list in case of emergency! Write these down, print it out, design your own checklist and share it with me so I can add it here to the post, whatever you want to do!
You can do this!
I’d love to hear from you: how do you manage overwhelm, and what are the steps you take to get out of that mental quicksand?!
Leave a comment below!
-Steve
PS: This week’s Rebel Hero: Nick T: rocking his new NF Battle Gear!
I can only assume he worked out so hard and flexed so perfectly that he blew the sleeves right off of it 🙂 Nick has been a super supportive member of our community for years and I’m damn glad he’s here.
Want to be the next Rebel Hero? Take a photo of you doing something epic in your NF battle gear, tag us on Instagram with #NerdFitness #battlegear, or email us at [email protected]!
PHOTO SOURCES: All amazing LEGO photos are from Black Zack, whose photos are here on Flickr.
Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck. published first on https://dietariouspage.tumblr.com/
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