#barry and jacob are so fucking hot
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i just finished saltburn & no one talk to me because i’m foaming at the mouth absolutely drenched & sick in the head!
#there are two kinds of people#people who are disturbed by saltburn#and the people who are turned on#can you guess which one i am#HAHAHA#barry and jacob are so fucking hot#barry being a toxic dom freak has me weak
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Christ i am so weak for this man i need him to bash my head in till im speaking in tongues
#barry in black will be the death of me#hes so fucking hot#i need him biblically#barry keoghan#oliver quick#felix catton#jacob elordi#cattonquick#saltburn
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felix catton oral fixation…feli x cattonnn oral fixati o n… felix catton oral…..felix catton save me 😵💫
#that man needs to have anything and everything in his mouth#ollie is one of those things#him with a lollipop in his mouth…#ollie looking at felix intensely as he sexily smokes on the floor#it’s so fucking hot followed with ollie’s i know#GOD#felix x oliver#oliver quick#saltburn#cattonquick#felix catton#saltburn posting#barry keoghan#jacob elordi#lgbtqia
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"Barry is so ugly"
"I dont see the hype behind Jeremy Alan white"
"Hot take: zendaya is not attractive"
"Jacob elordi isn't all that"
"Now that the pedro hype is down, can we admit he isn't good-looking?"
"Bella is too unattractive to play a 13 year-old girl"
"Margot Robbie is mid"
Go read whatever new 30-page pdf file that your designated alpha male is trying to market as an ebook. Rot your mind with the 14-step skincare routine of the month. Buy your Stanleys and post on r/rateme.
Go be insufferable and unloveable
Touch grass you cunts.
You people piss me off. You are so delusional and deranged that you've been completely blinded by whatever new trend is being puked by the good for nothing "lifestyle" youtuber you're worshipping at the moment
You fucking bellends, having a conversation with you is draining and brain-rotting. The way you speak of people sickens me. You lack so much basic media literacy and just basic empathy and understanding of the people around you that you can't see the talent in art if not bloated with 6 ml of fillers.
Every time I hear you speak, I'm filled with unimaginable levels of superiority.
#barry keoghan#margot robbie#bella ramsey#pedro pascal#jacob elordi#jeremy allen white#zendaya#the last of us#tlou#saltburn#barbie#the bear
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Is Jacob Elordi actually talented or is he just hot?
Barry Koeghan and Nicholas Galitzine are also both suddenly fucking everywhere but they're like actually talented actors so I get it. Jacob Elordi, however........
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I must have missed the Met Gala ‘fuck off’ Anna Wintour thingy mabob regarding Meghan.
If you have time could you please expand on it? I saw it on another post and it really peaked my interest 😁
Sure! The only way the rumor makes sense is if you know "Met Gala 101" so I'll start there, then dive into the rumor. I will warn you now, the rumor ends up getting a little tinhatty because the timing is strange.
The main thing to know is that Anna Wintour has final say over everything that happens at the Met Gala, including what/who people wear. (Some people believe she personally approves every outfit, others think she just likes knowing what people are wearing so she can edit and organize the red carpet like it's a photoshoot.) As part of this, Anna also has final approval over who is invited as plus-ones to the designers.
So there are a few different ways to get on the invite list for the Met Gala:
Be the guest of a designer/fashion house who has bought a table or tickets. To get a designer +1, you usually need a personal relationship with a designer (either an ambassadorship like Kristen Stewart is for Chanel or you're besties like Sarah Jessica Parker and Alexander McQueen or Zac Posen and Katie Holmes) or you need to be a hot It celebrity of the moment like Zendaya, Taylor Swift, Barry Keoghan, Jacob Elordie.
Purchase your own ticket (they start at $50K nowadays).
Be a huge donor to the Met, either in money or time.
Work at Vogue or one of the Gala's sponsors.
Perform at the Gala (which is how the Kardashians finally got invited - Kim was Kanye's +1, who was performing).
Be the partner/friend of someone who fits into one of these categories, and hope they get a +1 and choose you.
(I also think the gala's co-hosts get a couple of tickets for free.)
That's "Met Gala 101." Now, the rumor.
Edward Enninful, who was then the editor of British Vogue, was said to have invited Meghan to the Met Gala as his +1. (He gets tickets for being a Vogue employee and Anna approved Meghan as his guest because she fell under "hot It celebrity of the moment".) Allegedly, when Anna asked to know what Meghan was going to wear, Meghan upset/offended her, and Anna rescinded her approval for Meghan to be Edward's guest and Edward dropped Meghan.
There are a few different versions about what Meghan did to Anna:
Meghan refused to tell Anna who/what she was wearing.
Anna gave suggestions to Meghan and she refused to listen.
Meghan lied/changed her mind about who she was wearing after getting Anna's OK and changed her outfit.
Supposedly this was for Met Gala 2019. Supposedly, Meghan was so pissed off that she was uninvited from the Met Gala that she had Archie on May 6th to steal the headlines/thunder from Anna in revenge.
I'm not sure how valid this one is. The timing is suspicious because no way would anyone let a due-any-day pregnant woman travel like that, especially not one who was said to be overdue. (I think Harry wrote in Spare that Archie was 2 weeks overdue.) So either it confirms surrogacy - especially when you remember that in January or February, Meghan told a wellwisher "nearly there, not long to wait" about her pregnancy - or it's completely made up. It wouldn't be the first time that someone made something up and it caught on like wildfire.
It's more plausible to me if this was about the 2018 Met Gala, which was held May 7, 2018. A quick google search showed Meghan didn't have any events or make any public appearances around that time so it's possible she could've been planning a quick popover before the wedding. It's when she would have been most in demand and most sought-after, and it would have been a real coup for Anna and Edward to get her "red carpet society debut" over British society.
It wouldn't have been Met Gala 2020, which was cancelled for COVID. Enninful didn't go to Met Gala 2021 (it overlapped with the opening of London Fashion Week and he was photographed at parties with Naomi Campbell. I documented the rumor on my spreadsheet in 2021 so any of the years after don't count.
So, that's the rumor and the backstory. It's totally up to you whether you believe it or not. If it is true, or a variation of it is true, then the Met Gala crowd and the New York elite crowd that's close to Anna would've absolutely heard about Meghan's behavior. The other thing to remember about Anna is that she also occupies British society too, so she may also be aware of what British society says about Meghan (and Harry).
I'll end this with a little bit of Met Gala gossip from last year (2023). Last year, Olivia Wilde showed up to the Met Gala in the same outfit as Margaret Zhang, Vogue China's editor (Olivia's dress was white, Margaret's was blue). This sort of snafu is exactly why Anna likes to have input in what people wear, so Olivia Wilde showing up to a red carpet in the same outfit of another guest - a Vogue editor specifically - is the worst fashion sin of them all. That she did it at the Met Gala? With the entire world watching? I mean, you might as well go crawl under the Brooklyn Bridge and accept your life as the new bridge troll. But that's not the juicy bit. The juicy bit is that Olivia Wilde showing up in the same outfit of another guest means she wasn't the +1 for a designer or a guest of the Met because Anna would've told her to wear something else since the outfit was committed to Margaret. It means that Olivia paid $50K out of pocket to be embarrassed and supposedly Anna and Margaret were both so upset by it that Olivia may have been blacklisted from the gala for a few years. Now, why would Olivia shell out $50K for a ticket? Allegedly Harry Styles was going to be there too and she wanted to get back together with him.
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The way people talk about Barry on twitter is genuinely so vile to me. Like it's perfectly fine to not find him attractive but to say shit like "He looks like a burn victim" is so fucking disgusting. And how they bully people who find him hot is such juvenile behaviour, saying people only like him because he's white or bcs he's standing next to jacob or whatever. You might be behind the screen but there's no reason to act so nasty towards someone you don't even know.
#sorry im having a moment#ppl are so rude online for no reason#can't we just fucking enjoy thing#calling ppl ugly like they're a fucking supermodel themselves
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I’m too afraid that a Wallflower adaptation would be absolutely butchered in an attempt to appeal to non romance fans/puritans pushing for sexless media…
I think several issues would corrupt that show, tbh. Those you mentioned, for sure. Imo, The Wallflowers does a superb job of balancing the standalone nature of a good romance and an ongoing plot. You can read them on their own, but (imo) they are MUCH better when read in sequence, especially Winter coming off of Autumn. But if you adapted them somewhat faithfully, they'd all work in a mini-like way.
But of course, I think people would feel the need to have these dumb subplots to make it less romantic. We'd get some bullshit about Westcliff and Simon doing a business thing, Lillian starting her own company, Daisy going out to be proto-Louisa May Alcott/Eloise Bridgerton. I'm sure we'd see Evie getting abused by her family/sexually harassed by her cousin onscreen, because we super need that.
And I think there would be this need to connect things more than necssary. The books do some of it, right? Like, Westcliff and Lillian do get foreshadowed a ton in Summer, and I do think you have this through-line of their life because Lisa LOVES Westcliff, and the series basically ends with their firstborn coming into the world... Until Christmas, which would theoretically be a great finale/special, where you do see more of Evie and Sebastian because Lisa realized by then where the money shot was for fans lol.
But like. I can just SEE them seeding Evie and Sebastian way more than is necessary to create a continuance, and part of what makes their romance so good is that it is so out of nowhere for both of them. I think Sebastian alludes to seeing her in passing at one point, but he was like "whatever" because she was SUCH a Wallflower.
And I do think they wouldn't do the sex justice. Frankly, I don't really think Hollywood is currently casting a lot of men with leading man potential...? Or like, sex appeal? A lot of them read very boyish. I think a Wallflowers show would ideally be diversely cast, I'm not married to like, a blond white guy playing St. Vincent, but I don't even see where anyone is really getting a lot of actors that could pull off the brusque masculinity of Westcliff or the ridiculous sex appeal of St. V.
I mean, it can be done. Before it went downhill and everyone started fucking with everyone's hair, Sam Heughan and Caitriona Balfe were super well cast for Outlander. (David Barry was toooo.) Interview with the Vampire has not one, but TWO super hot and talented men in the lead. It can be done. But then you've got Bton, where they lucked the FUCK out with casting Rege for the first season, they lucked out again because while Jonathan Bailey is ultimately "a random white guy" visually, he's charismatic, very talented, and had great chemistry with Simone Ashley... and benefited from a first season that for all its flaws was way more enjoyable to watch and set the second season up for success, I'm sorry. Every other leading man on that show is "another random white guy". Put the dudes they have lined up against a Sam Heughan, a Jacob Anderson, a Sam Reid--both in terms of having a Distinct Look and Vibe and talent, it just doesn't compare. Mainstream American casting directors currently are not tapping into the type of mindset that like... the people casting Kdramas are. Or, on a good day, the people casting telenovelas and daytime soaps. The well is DRY. Girls? They can still find talented, charismatic girls. But I feel like, in part because there's such a need to make everything wholesome and it's easier to sell a hot grown ass actress as wholesome and sexy versus a hot grown ass actor.
So. Yeah. I don't know. I just don't think it would be done super well, lol.
Also, they'd completely bastardize the St. V plot in Autumn. That just wouldn't be done today. No fucking way. He'd like, shove Lillian off her horse or something lmao. IF that. There would be no kidnapping. Certainly no threats.
And I'm sorry, but that kinda ruins the whooole thing.
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I can't believe the same people saying Barry Keoghan is hot think Jacob Elordi is ugly. Did expectant mothers really take that many drugs from 1997 to 2012 or am I being mass trolled?
i understand being mr kissing booth neutral to unfavorable on anything except saltburn like i have never been attracted to him before but my god he looks so good in that movie it's absurd. but to be fair to barry keoghan his giant blue eyes and loser boy personality are very bewitching as well. 'or you could just fuck me' like oh okay mr parasite i see how it is! love a movie where everyone and everything is so so so pretty even if jacob elordi is the prettiest of them all and you'd have to be a little delusional to not notice <3
#i am so rarely enamoured with men i am not the person to commiserate with on people's bad taste#however. i do have eyes. and jacob elordi with an eyebrow piercing is maybe the most beautiful thing i've ever seen.
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ok this is my last word on saltburn (lying) but the thing i keep coming back to is that it was not erotic. besides the cum guzzling scene, the scene that makes up so much of its marketing, it is a deeply unsexy movie. which is crazy bc it bills itself as the erotic thriller!!! where barry keoghan guzzles jacob elordi's cum!!! i don't want to say that the way it's shot is clinical, bc being clinical can be erotic, but it just lacks desire.
a big part of this is just the framing of the scenes - the intimate close up works for the cum guzzling scene because it is focusing on the objects of desire, like jacob elordi's forearm flexing while he beats it or just making the audience stare directly at oliver tonguing the drain. for the other sex scenes, though, the tight framing works to the movie's detriment. the other hj scene in the movie is a closeup of the two actor's faces, but because it is shot in the dark and so close up i can't tell what the fuck is happening below the belt. imo the sexiest part of that scene is the wide shot where u see oliver perched on top of farley. i also hate the choice to shoot it in that small ass aspect ratio for basically this reason.
another part of this is that i don't believe that oliver wants anybody. this might just be a me problem but i don't think there is enough groundwork in his interactions w the cast to establish his wanting. that desperation that u see in the bathtub scene is so strong but bc his character is supposed to be a conniving, hidden guy, he is mostly skulking around for the first half of the movie. the alleged magnetism of the catton family and of saltburn rests on the audience feeling then lies on the charisma of the actors and the scenery.
all this to say is that my issue isn't that the movie didn't get me hot, it's that if the movie is supposed to be abt desire and consumption like u have to convince me that something desirable is fucking happening
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Proof that barry fucking keoghan wants me dead
#THESE ALL HAPPENED IN THE SPAN OF A WEEK#why does he do this to me i hate him actually#hes so fucking hot#barry keoghan#saltburn#oliver quick#felix catton#jacob elordi#emerald fennell#cattonquick#lgbtqia
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if you’re a rafe stan scroll bc this is not rafe cameron friendly!
IDK HOW I MISSED THIS THE FIRST TIME AROUND BUT:
rafe CANONICALLY hangs around minors (16 year olds) as a whole nineteen year old, sold coke to them (most likely more than once since he said to barry ‘who has my access?’ which means he’s had to have either done this before or considered it), yelled at some old guys about his precious golf ball over his own shot, PHYSICALLY ASSAULTED an unarmed pope WITH A GOLF CLUB and harassed him just because he wouldn’t give up beers THAT WEREN’T EVEN HIS and then proceeded to LAUGH about it and rub it in his face… all in one episode.
He’s also, canonically, A MURDERER. He murdered Peterkin IN COLD BLOOD and didn’t give a shit about her, only protecting Ward. The daddy issues thing is an entire other piece, but that does NOT GIVE SOMEONE AN EXCUSE TO KILL ANOTHER PERSON!!!! SO!!!!!!!!!! It looks like he has MAJOR anger issues as well, which isn’t too bad but he doesn’t do anything to try and control it, which is what’s causing a lot of problems as well. Like he’s just fucking with people to fuck with them but also he doesn’t have??? an off switch for the violence seemingly????
Dare I say it, OBX Nate Jacobs? Nate is also a douchebag to people for fun, has DEFINITE anger issues and a very complicated relationship with his father that’s more negative than not. He’s canonically abusive to Maddie, which is a notable difference, but he’s also a rich asshole, which works with Rafe as well. But people excuse this behavior for both of them because they’re hot white guys/fandom white boys, which is honestly scary since they’re shown portraying such out of pocket behaviors consistently.
i’m just staring at all of this during the rewatch like… WHAT’S NOT CLICKING???? 💀
#drew starkey is pretty indeed but canon rafe is just……… no#like we’re all watching the same show right????????? we’re all seeing this????????????#as a WOC this dude seems like the type of guy i’d be afraid to meet on the street in broad daylight let alone at night#idk maybe i’m missing something but it’s giving terrifying now that I’m looking closer#anti rafe cameron#s2 can we get this man accountability for his actions and a cold hard jail cell for manslaughter —#i just needed to vent about this cause my dislike for this man runs DEEP and it’s only growing during the rewatch 💀
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A Very Colin Christmas - Colin Shea x reader
Ch.4 - A Holy Jolly Christmas
ch.1 ch.2 ch.3
a/n - hey lovely people!! here’s the fourth chapter, and a reminder that tomorrow there’s no chapter and friday will be the last one, so happy Christmas eve eve to those who celebrate, enjoy!<3
Summary: Slowly but surely, you discover why Colin was so apprehensive about having his family over, and also realize something you should’ve realized long ago...
Word Count: 1.5k
Warnings: curse words, angst if you squint
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The next day, it was the morning of Christmas eve, and you figured you should do some grocery shopping before stores close down for the holidays, so you put on your clothes and headed out of the apartment, locking the door behind you and turning around to –
"Good morning," Eleanor was standing in the threshold of Colin's apartment, the morning newspaper in her hand.
"Good morning," you answered with a smile you hoped didn't look too fake.
"Who lives there?" she asked.
"Just, uh… my friend," you shifted uncomfortably. "I um, this morning I got a text to… come help her, and now we're done and it's still pretty early so I figured I wouldn't bother you. I was just going home to change."
"Alright, we'll see you later I assume," she stated.
"Of course," you smiled awkwardly and went down the stairs as quickly as you could. Once you were out of the building you started heading to the shop, and as you were walking you pulled out your phone to call Colin. He didn't answer, and you sighed in frustration before putting your phone back in your bag. You hoped he had enough sense to handle it on his own.
While you were shopping, there were some interesting developments at Colin's.
"Colin," Eleanor barged into his room and opened the curtain. "I think your girlfriend is cheating on you."
It took his foggy brain a second to register her words. "What?"
"I don't think you can trust her," she crossed her hands on her chest.
"Good morning to you too," he rubbed the sleep from his eyes.
"Colin, I'm being serious, I-"
"I know mom, let me just wake up for a few minutes and we can talk about it, alright?"
"Fine," she said, her lips drawn into a thin line and left the room. Colin sighed groggily and went to get dressed and brush his teeth. He didn't know what the fuck his mom was talking about, but he sure as hell was going to stall as much as he could without knowing.
When he went into the kitchen, she was there. Obviously.
"There you are! So this morning I went out to bring the newspaper."
"Anything interesting in it?" he asked as he started making himself a coffee.
"No, but listen to this – when I was in the hallway the door opposite opened, and guess who came out? Your girlfriend, Colin. It was your girlfriend."
It took all of his willpower not to burst into laughter on the spot. Instead, he frowned. "What did she say?"
"That her friend was living there and needed help. But I'm not buying it," she shook her head. "She looked very suspicious."
"Well, she's telling the truth mom," he smiled. "Her friend is living there. She introduced us, actually," he lied casually.
"Oh," Eleanor frowned. "Okay then."
Only when she left Colin could allow himself to snicker into his coffee. That was close.
When you came back with your groceries, you prayed Eleanor wouldn't see you, since you couldn't excuse that away if she had. But thankfully, the hallway was empty, and you let yourself into your apartment without any more awkward encounters.
You shot Colin a text asking him when he wanted you to "arrive" at his place, and he said that in about an hour or so. That gave you just enough time to take a long shower and almost forget about the morning.
An hour later, fresh out of the shower, you knocked on Colin's door. Eleanor opened the door, and she smiled a tight-lipped smile as she ushered you in.
You both sat down in the living room, Colin and his dad nowhere in sight. You assumed they were both somewhere in the house and simply didn't hear you arrive, but you thought asking where they were was maybe a little tactless as Eleanor led the way to the living room, sitting down seemingly eager to talk to you.
"So," she started, "how did you and Colin meet?"
"Oh, um," you fumbled over your words for a second trying to come up with a convincing story, "I met him at a gig of his. I thought his music was great and when we got to know each other I realized how great he was himself," you smiled.
"Really? That's funny, because Colin told me your friend from across the hall was the one who introduced you…" she trailed off in an unsaid question.
Your heart was racing as you tried to keep up with your lies, but you didn't let it show. "Well, she actually did. She was the one who brought me to see his show that night. When she told me her neighbor was a musician I was a little skeptical, but we both had a great time. After the show she took me backstage and introduced us, and the rest is history," you channeled your relief into a smile.
"Grilling her already, mom?" Colin said from behind you and you resisted the urge to sigh in relief as he came to sit beside you, wrapping his arm around your shoulders.
"We were just having a conversation, son," she chuckled.
You chuckled as well, trying to diffuse the tension. "Yeah, I was just telling her about the night we met, when we were at that gig of yours."
"Oh yeah, it's a cute story," he smiled at you.
"When are Andy, Laurie and Jacob coming for dinner?" you asked in an attempt to change the subject before it gets awkward.
"They should be here at around six," Colin replied.
"Oh, you know Andy's a lawyer, right?" Eleanor asked you.
"Yes, we talked about it last night," you chuckled embarrassedly.
"Ah, of course! Anyway, I'm just wondering why his brother here doesn't follow in his footsteps," she reached forward as if sharing a secret with you. "You know, if you ever want to start a family, a steady income is very important."
"Well, we haven't even moved in yet, Eleanor," you were getting a little pissed now. "I'd say I have no say in what Colin chooses to do or not do, right?"
"Of course, I'm just worried about my little boy," she smiled at Colin and he returned what looked more like a grimace than a smile.
"You shouldn't be," you said, "he's wonderful," you looked at him and smiled genuinely.
"Awww, thank you," he said playfully, and you giggled.
"You two are such a cute couple," William, Colin's father said as he entered the room, sitting next to Eleanor.
"Yeah, you are," she agreed with him.
You and Colin just smiled at them. You didn't know what he was thinking, but what you yourself were thinking terrified you. I wish we were.
Soon enough everyone was there and you could start on the Christmas dinner, which was mostly courtesy of Eleanor and Laurie but at least Colin provided the venue. While you were eating, they were all talking amongst themselves, which left you plenty of time to think things over.
The thing was, while you had initially agreed to all of this, you just thought of it as a favor to a friend, nothing more, and now you were starting to realize just how… magical denial was. Because even in Colin's family was kind of annoying, apart from his admittedly hot older brother, Colin was surprisingly un-annoying for the last couple of days. He was actually being really… sweet.
It was the last thought that truly sent you spiraling. Because knowing Colin can be this sweet made it all the more bitter that it wasn't true.
Before, you could just tell yourself that Colin Shea wasn't really capable of love. That he wasn't ready. But now that you were seeing him like this, you knew that wasn't true, it couldn't be. No, the agonizing reality was – he can love. He just didn't want that, and certainly not with you. He had every opportunity to start something with you – hell, even just a one night stand – and he didn't. Sure, he flirted and joked around, but when it came down to it, you knew what Colin Shea seriously flirting looked like, and it never once happened with you, and you were sure of that.
Because if he really tried, deep down you knew you would let him succeed.
The food in your mouth suddenly became too dry, and you gulped down some water to steady yourself.
After dinner, everyone sat down in the living room to watch a Christmas movie. You and Colin sat next to each other on the couch, and you were trying to concentrate on the film when his hand wrapped around your shoulder. Nothing too bold.
You tried to hold your concentration, but then he started drawing patterns on your shirt, running his hand along the covered curve of your shoulder and all together with your thoughts it was… just too much.
"You know what guys?" you said after a few minutes, "I think I should probably go. I'm just pretty tired, I'm sorry," you said as you left your chair.
They all just kind of stared at you, and you didn't blame the after that out of the blue statement. All you knew is that you needed out of here.
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i love validation so if you have any feedback (even if it’s negative i take constructive criticism lol) feel free to tell me:)
Taglist: @horny-nd-bored @shannon124 @perfectlyharolds @wintersoldierslut @iceebabies @sleepingpapermouse @steverogerswasalwaysworthy @holtzkinnon @angelicl-y @stydia-4-ever @thatoneperson5000 @fangirlfree @kaitcordx25 @bequeening @steve-barry-damon-logan @itscrazycherryblossomcollection @hollandxmarvel @stargazingfangirl18 @readsreblogsfics @onetwo3000 @beritmetal @harrystylesholland @jazbot2000 @anobscurename @xxxtwilightaxelxxx @peggycarter-steverogers @evansphnx12
A Very Colin Christmas Taglist: @janaygrant
if you wanna join / be removed from a taglist, comment/message me! much love <3
#chris evans x reader#colin shea x reader#chris evans x you#chris evans x female reader#chris evans x y/n#chris evans fluff#colin shea x female reader#colin shea fluff
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Say It Again//Barry Berkman
A/N: Done in collaboration with @starting-now, inspired by Bill Hader’s character in Forgetting Sarah Marshall, where he is endlessly patient with his step brother then blows up at him for insulting his wife. The crazy talented @starting-now has done a similar imagine with Barry defending the reader over on their blog as well that you should all check out.
You had known Gene for a long time and had been his assistant for almost just as long. He taught the acting classes and was in charge of the school while as his assistant, you managed the business side of things for him, making sure that the checks went out for rent and utilities, handled signing up new students, collecting student fees, even helped him run classes and acted as a stage manager of sorts for him.
Needless to say, you had put up with a lot from Gene Cousineau over the years. He was your boss and your friend but he was also one of the worst assholes you had ever met. And today in particular he was really living up to that title.
You knew he was supposed to hear back about an audition today and judging from his attitude today, it hadn’t gone well. He had already made Sally cry once this morning during rehearsals for a class play coming up and you could tell Jacob seemed close to tears when Gene was done with him. You shook your head, sipping your coffee and offering Jacob a reassuring smile as he left the stage. He didn’t return it though, frowning deeply at you as he rushed into the wings. You bit the inside of you lip and looked over at Gene who was sitting coldly and calmly next to you.
“Do you need a break Gene?”
“No, what I need are better actors in my class. Because none of these people will cut it.” He whispered harshly, turning back in his seat to face the stage. “Come on, next scene. Barry and Sally, you’re up! And Sally, try to make me believe you for once!”
You resisted the urge to roll your eyes at him and sat back in your seat. A small grin made its way onto your face almost involuntarily at the sight of Barry and Sally on the stage though. Despite her earlier break down Sally seemed calmer now, though she was still struggling with projecting her lines even though she was hitting her marks like a champ. You smiled proudly at her performance, letting your eyes slide over her to Barry and his performance. He stuttered slightly, his nervousness obvious as he keeps looking down at the script in his hands while he speaks.
He’s almost more reading aloud than acting at times but the longer the scene goes on the more relaxed he becomes, causing you to smile. You know how hard Barry’s been working at his acting, wanting to be the best actor he can be. You’d even run lines for this very scene with him last night. You knew he could be a good actor given enough time and practice and the thought makes something warm and proud grow inside your chest.
“Okay, stop, both of you.”
Your smile drops at Gene’s sudden exclamation in a bord tone. Looking over you could see the emotionless expression on your boss’ face and knew that he had not seen the same improvements and signs of promise in the two actors as you had. Gene stood slowly from his seat, walking out into the middle aisle of the theater so that everyone's eyes were on him.
“Barry, Sally, were you trying to make me sick?”
Barry blinked a few times while Sally’s face dissolved into one of crushing disappointment. This was her second time being reprimanded by Gene today. Sally and Barry both looked at each other and shook their heads.
“No.”
“No, of course not.”
“No? Well that’s to bad. Because if you had been trying then I would have told you, you actually did a good job for once. But since you weren’t trying then you both really are just that terrible.”
“Gene!” You stood up from your seat so quickly you almost dropped your coffee on yourself. The back of your neck felt hot as you spoke in the calmest voice you could manage while all eyes turned on you. “Can I speak to you a minute? In your office?”
You left no room for argument and raised your brows challengingly at Gene when he looked at you funnily. He sighed dramatically and shook his head. “Alright everybody, take five.”
Barry shook his head at you in confusion but you simply turned on your heels and stormed out of the theater, not stopping until you were in the main office. Gene followed you quietly, shutting the door behind him. You turned and shook your head disappointed.
“What the hell was that?”
“That’s what I’d like to know. It’s like they are trying to ruin this play. You know it’s only two weeks away?”
“Yeah, I know. That’s why they’ve all be practicing every chance they get. I know they’re not perfect-”
“You got that right.”
“But they’re trying! Maybe you should cut them some slack for once.”
Gene looked at you like you had just told him the sky was orange. He scoffed at you. “I’m sorry, are you running this studio?”
You opened your mouth, hands moving to your hips but he didn’t let you speak. “Oh wait, you’re not. I am. And you’re what again?”
You sighed, pursing your lips before answering, “Your assistant.”
“Exactly. I run the studio, I teach the classes and you’re my assistant.” He started to turn to walk out of the room before turning back around to look at you. “I know Barry is your boyfriend or something but that doesn’t change the fact that he’s the worst actor in the class. Just because you’re screwing him doesn’t mean I’m going to go easy on him in there.”
You paused, looking up at Gene suddenly. Your eyes were wide, your teeth clicked when you clenched your jaw. You stared at Gene, crossing your arms across your chest.
“You really want to have this conversation with me Gene? Do you really want to have this conversation right now?”
There was a hard edge to your voice that Gene wasn’t use to hearing. It took him by surprise so he nodded. That was all you needed.
“He is one of the most dedicated actors in your class and I love him! Screw you Gene, he gives everything to this class, all your students do, and you treat them like shit just because you can!”
You took a deep breath as Gene stared at you wide eyed.
“Yeah, he’s going to be fantastic actor one day and it’s got nothing to do with you! He already can learn all his lines, hit all his marks, and understand his characters, give him time and he’ll be the best in this class! You want to be a dick just because you failed an audition Gene?! Well maybe you could learn a little something in persistence from your students then. You tear them down and they get right back up their on that stage. You may be my boss but you’re a dick! You think you can run this place without me? Really?! I do everything for you except yell at your fucking students. Do you really think you could run this place without me? You narcissistic prick. Talk about Barry like that to me again and you’ll have to find out.”
You sighed, all the anger and frustration draining from your body with the end of your speech. Your face still felt hot and flushed, Gene was staring at you dumb struck. You shook your head.
“You’ve just got to get your shit together Gene. I know its rough out there for everyone. Acting jobs are hard enough to come by for a younger actor but that doesn’t mean you get to come in here and tear good actors down because of it.”
Gene nodded, still staring at you wide eyed. You cleared your throat hesitantly, “Well, I’m gonna get back out there.”
He nodded again, “Okay.”
You nodded and brushed by him out of the room. You closed the door behind you softly, turning to come face to face with Barry.
“Oh! Geeze, Barry. You scared me.”
“Sorry, sorry. I heard screaming, are you okay?”
“Oh, yeah I’m fine. Gene and I were just-, How much of that did you hear anyway?”
He said nothing for a second before a shy smile breaks out on his face, “You really think I’m going to be a fantastic actor?”
You shook your head, wishing he hadn’t heard all of that. “You know it’s rude to eavesdrop.”
You sighed at the down turned expression on his face and his small, shrug.
"You're fantastic already Barry. Just a little rough around the edges is all." You blushed, looking anywhere but at him. "But everyone needs practice. Come on, everyone's waiting."
You brushed by him, still coming down from the anger you'd felt earlier and embarrassed that anyone else had heard you that way. You were stopped by Barry's voice however when he caught up next you in only a few steps.
"Hey, thank you." His serious tone caught you off guard. "No ones ever really stood up for me like that before."
You took a deep breath, wondering about what happened to this man in his past but then smiled like the two of you were now in on some secret. Which you kind of where if you counted him overhearing you yell at Mr. Cousinean in his office that one day about how he treats his students a secret. Reaching up on your toes you kissed Barry gently.
"I've got your back Barry Block."
You winked for good measure before slipping back into the theater.
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