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blueparadis · 1 year

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❝ I CAN'T HELP IT ❞ + BACHIRA MEGURU ❪ playing ⌗10, ⌗11 & ⌗12 ❫─── via radio line ❛anatomy of emotions ❜〳 from this is what ____ feels like !⠀

[ content and themes ] :: abo au + modern au, f!omega!reader, pov!bachira, slice of life, exs to lovers, mutual pinning, flirting, fast burn,angst and comfort, silent confessions, fluff , $mut descriptions; word count— 2k // [ synopsis ] :: After a whirlwind of highschool years, Bachira trips over an old flame and this time he is not afraid to get hurt no matter how many times he falls. // [ notes ] :: this is for my beloved dee @semisgroupie via snow’s valentine gift exchange ( @suyacho ). just wanna say that I've never been so happy with the results of a lottery ;› ß’read by cherry <;3 ( @cherrykamado ) // [ tag index ] :: for blog navigation ; event masterlist is linked in title. also available in my ao3.

Break-ups are never easy. They tend to do more damage than we expect, than we could ever do to ourselves. Humans say that falling in love is the most beautiful feeling. It would never let hope die,however weak it is. It would never let you weep alone. No matter how much you trip and hurt yourself, you still manage to be up on your feet again to follow them everywhere till the last breath. Love is eternal, they say. They never say how to fall out of love. Humans claim that they fall in love only once; true love happens only once unlike such animals.

Such is the theory in this world where alphas, betas and omegas exist along with humans. Not only that, but they are actually thriving well, that is, the prospect of cohabitation has become more flourishing than before.In fact, the head representative of such inhumans claims that within a century , there might not be any existence of humans.

Bachira agrees. He agrees with the theory of love, not the animalistic part. He agrees, if he falls, he will fall so hard that he would not be able to pick himself up, at least he thought he wouldn't. His first break- up at least taught him how he was so not in love with y/n. People tend to miss their partner after break-ups, but he never missed her, not even once. Sure, there was this unsettling feeling at the corner of his heart but it faded with time.

Sometimes, he even thought that there was not enough love between her and himself so he would miss her, after she was gone like the wind. And now she is standing in front of the list of the candidates that have cleared for higher studies. Bachira did too. He can see his name in the list of dominant alpha males. He can also see her name and her feeble stature at ease amidst the crowd. No doubt she is a human, must be, otherwise what kind of omega would not be able to detect the presence of an alpha?

Bachira starts to walk towards her hoping she would recognize his scent, turn around if he released enough pheromones but he halted, he had to. How could he not when she ran away with tears in her eyes to the nearest restroom. Was she not happy about her selection? Did she see his name too? Who on earth would cry if they had cleared scholarship exams? Humans. Twisted humans.

It has been a week since I saw y/n on campus. I don’t even know her particulars and not that I need to but it would be nice to have some info on her so that I could avoid her at all costs. She was the first person I have ever dated. There were a few after her but it wasn’t like I imagined. I didn’t miss her like I was supposed to miss after a ‘break-up’, I didn’t try to contact her or anything like that after she left due to her father’s job transfer. Now that I think about it, it’s pretty much ;ame reason for a break-up. We didn’t particularly talk after we parted. . . wait, does that mean we never broke up? That’s even more lame. Fuck fuck fuck why does she have to go to same college as I do. It could have been any other college in this gigantic city. . . oh fuck! I hate this, I hate this so much.

Bachira does not have any idea how to react if he were to cross paths with her, how to act like an ‘ex’ and hence he was always on guard. Whenever he could feel her presence he would always resort to detours rather than the normal shorter paths. Part of him felt horrible about himself , and another part was happy that she was coming to college, studying , living her day without being aware of her ex’s presence. Must be nice to be a human, to be so clueless about the raw edges of emotions. While he had his own emotional waves to avoid Y/N had her own inner turmoil to come at peace with. Not only did she crack the scholarship exams but also she was identified as an omega. The worst part was she came to know when she saw her name in the list of omegas who are selected for a pass in higher studies. Throughout her whole life she was taught how to talk like a human, behave like a human, feel like a human and now she is one of them now; a creature of the wild. Even though her parents were able to accept it quickly she took a few weeks to come in terms with it. Why was that?

Her mother is human but her father is not. He is an omega with dominant genes. After first, y/n thought that her parents had a cute love story, just like one of those fairy tales— beauty and the beast. It felt nice. It felt perfect. She wanted it for herself, she wanted to experience one such fairy-like love story, at least once in her lifetime but it ended when she saw her father yell at her mom, so loud, so harsh that she almost cried. Y/N tried to overlook it as ‘just one-time’ but arguments became regular after that. Home was not home anymore.

But the sun shone upon Y/N again when the family was blessed with another child, a boy, an omega. She was happy that her mom and dad did not fight anymore but the fear in her heart never went away. And, hence when her father had an order of job transfer she left without saying goodbye to her boyfriend who was as warm as the sun. In her defense, she did not have her personal cell phone yet, nor had a chance to see him at school.

It was during summer vacation when they left the city without any trace of good memories.

And what are the odds that after a year they would bump into each other after a sultry summer afternoon? “Woah!”, y/n blurted, noticing that her ex was playing soccer with a bunch of guys from her class.

Thereafter, each Monday she used to sit to watch him play. He has not changed, not a bit. Just a little here and there on appearances. He was taller than before, had a piercing just above his cupid’s bow and had a short ponytail; it seemed like he would let his hair grow.

And, each Monday whenever Bachira could not sense her scent anymore, could not feel her presence anymore he would look back to check and watch her walking through the corridor till she was out of sight. He even got hit by the ball for being distracted but that’s okay. He could let it slide.

Y/N missed two Mondays in a row and his head was everywhere but not in the game anymore. He could muster up enough courage to pass by her classroom. He almost locked on the probability of not seeing her again, expecting her seat to be empty. Four more steps and he will pass through the back-door of her class room.

one.

two.

three.

four.

The poor fruit juice can was a victim of Bachira’s anger. He never felt so betrayed before, not even when y/n left him without any word or explanation. But the second he passed that back door he was still like a sculpture witnessing the greatest miracle that life has to offer. She was looking outside through the door, with her lips having an upward crescent of mischief that made Bachira lock eyes with her. The bell rang. It was lunch break. All the students were walking out of the classroom, running through the corridor yet only two souls remain still.

All this time. She knew. She knew that her past was slowly trailing back to her.

Days rolled on, nights crept in but Bachira could not forget that face of hers, amidst the joyful unified screams of the students y/n was sitting in her place with a smile on her face. He even asked if they could have lunch together or not but all she did was to nod, part her lips to speak yet did not say a word before joining the crowd.

Thereafter, bachira’s toilet breaks became frequent. He felt like he was in love, again but he knew it better than anyone that it was ‘just a phase’, maybe infatuation or a crush. There is no way he would let an old flame rekindle when there was no affection to begin in falling for her. Yes, sure he liked her but maybe not enough to have her as girlfriend again. But he could tell something was different, something about her felt different. It’s her scent. It’s different than before.

“Nice play.”, Isagi yelled as he shared a high-five with Bachira. He thought of staying back even after practice since his parents are gonna be home late, it would be better if he dedicated some of his stamina to soccer. Everyone was getting their belongings together, changing dress and as such.

After a while all the commotion faded. Bachira was all alone in the locker room, the slow breeze soothing his muscles while he kept his head bowed, eyes closed trying to recharge as quickly as possible. There was a feeble sound, someone was humming. Curiosity over took him and when he figured the source it amused him. It was a girl humming and moving her hips, probably practicing her steps as cheerleader, at least her outfit suggested so.

She closed the cupboard, turned around and almost jolted at the presence of another person, Bachira. He took a few steps towards her. Two to be precise, she backed away with two short steps feeling her back being pressed against the metal locker.

“Let me go.”, y/n tartly responded trying to avert his eyes.

It was as if he was under reflex when he thought for a response. “Kiss me and I’ll.”, Bachira boldly whispered and waited.

Two things began to happen simultaneously . One : y/n slowly began to lose control over her pheromones; she was new at this. It would have been easier if she were introduced to this way of living since childhood. It takes more effort to teach a grown man to behave than a child. It’s a reboot of her whole being within just a few weeks, certainly there would be cases where it would become faulty.

Two : Bachira was starting to feel impatient. He closed the gap with quick steps entering the room and locking the door with a loud thud with his foot. He was already tired from the practice but never before he felt this uneasy, this restless.

“What’re you doing?”she asked, squinting her eyes at him. There was no sound except the dull drilling noise of the fan. Bachira's lips parted to respond, “I . . . —- but his answer ended with his lips on hers. It was a short, dry kiss, just grazing of supple skins against one another. Bachira opened his eyes when he felt a strong push on his chest. Instinct took him over as he grabbed the edge of the bench otherwise he would have knocked his head on the ground.

“Fuck. . .”, his head felt heavy, vision a little blurred. He blinked a few times before getting up on his feet. He saw her bags and earphones on the ground. There was a bunch of noise in the corridor, giggles and talks of girls. Before anyone could spot any trace of disaster, he grabbed her belongings and left the site immediately.

It was a cold wintry evening when Bachira fell in love again, tasting the tanginess of his first love. He was wrong about so many things. They were still not over, not like this. Their love was just in brilliant sparks back then and now it turned into a wildfire.

—

@tokyometronetwork

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