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ellascreams · 21 days

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Don’t Blow Up On Me

[You know what, Zor hacking into your radio signal and saying ominous threats at you during a high stakes mission is usually pretty scary. But when the person currently acting as your handler is a very low ranking ex-employee of theirs, it’s only a little creepy, and really more awkward than anything. Phoenix is just trying to diffuse a bomb. This fic does have some serious moments so don’t expect pure silliness.]

Phoenix mostly worked in their own little office these days. They didn’t have much of a reason to stay at any headquarters building. Still, they had to go to one sometimes, and this was the first time in a while they were really really glad they did.

They were still processing what had happened as they ran. It was all so fast. It started with filling out a survey about how well Ollie had acted as their handler while Reginald was sick. Ok, that made sense. That’s why they were there in the first place. To fill out all the required paperwork before Reginald came back to work tomorrow.

Then the alarm came with its flashing red lights, blaring sirens, and a repeating announcement of what was wrong. It started as just “SECURITY BREACH” and then suddenly became “BOMB THREAT.” Neither of those were good. They grabbed their earpiece and nodded at Ollie to show they were ready to help. Ollie quickly conversed with some other handlers. He turned to them and said “The other agents are going to take care of evacuation and look for any hidden traps or Zoraxis operatives. That leaves bomb duty to us!” He looked at the security report which had managed to calculate the general area the bomb was in. Then he looked at some old Zoraxis bomb models and used them to narrow down its location. “If my instincts are correct, it should be in the breaker room down in the basement.” Phoenix didn’t wait to be told to leave before they started running.

From the start of the alarm to the present, only a minute had passed. This whole situation was bad. Usually they would be upset to suddenly be in a situation like this, and they were, but they were still glad they came to the office when they did. If they weren’t there the bomb would probably still have been planted. They trusted the other agents to be capable of disarming a bomb, but they weren’t sure if they trusted the other agents enough to want them disarming a bomb when Ollie’s life was on the line. They wanted to be the one protecting him from this threat.

They got to the breaker room and the bomb was just… sitting there. On the floor. They were expecting it to be hidden amongst the electrical equipment or at least mounted to a wall somewhere. If they couldn’t disarm it they could probably just pick it up and move it away from the building. Hm, maybe not. It was a big bomb, almost the size of a suitcase, and it very well might explode before they could get it far enough away.

They took a crouched down and looked at it closer. They could hear it ticking but there was no visible timer. They didn’t know how much time they had.

“Agent Phoenix,” said a familiar voice in their ear, but it wasn’t Ollie’s voice or even Reginald’s. “I wasn’t expecting you. That was my mistake. You seem to have a knack for appearing at every mission I have a personal interest in.” Phoenix felt their heart beat faster. No matter how many times they heard Zor talk they couldn’t get used to it. Something about their smug tone, their unwavering conviction that they were in control, and that uncanny voice changer just made their skin crawl.

“I suppose you’ll be attempting to disarm my bomb then. Go right ahead. Convenient how we left it right there, on the ground, in plain sight. It’s almost too good to be true.” The agent instinctively looked up from the bomb and started scanning the room for hidden ones. They shouldn’t listen to Zor but they just said, or at least implied, what they were already thinking. Zor giggled ever so slightly.

“I think it’s best you don’t listen to them.” Phoenix was very relived to hear Ollie’s voice again. “If they think you’re smart enough to catch their usual tricks, they just make things simple and hope you’ll overthink it. And while I may not be familiar with this specific model, I’ve seen bombs like it, and that ticking sound is hard to replicate. It’s a real bomb, and the only bomb here.”

“Oh?” Huh. Phoenix didn’t know you could convey raising one eyebrow through nothing but the tone of your voice. “This isn’t your usual handler. How rude of you to not introduce us,” they said, as if Phoenix would ever want to give them information on other agents or was capable of saying the words needed for introductions. Ollie and Phoenix tried to ignore them.

“You’re going to have to get through the metal casing. It doesn’t have any screws, and cutting or melting through it risks the bomb going off.” Ollie paused thoughtfully. “If you could find something thin enough and strong enough to wedge between the gaps maybe you could pry it open?” Far easier said than done but Phoenix started searching the room nonetheless.

“Or maybe there’s no need to introduce us. He sounds awfully familiar… Ollie, was it?” Phoenix inhaled sharply. It was easy to forget he had actually talked to the doctor when he was such a low ranking employee. They even remembered his name. Eh, that wasn’t too surprising. You sort of need a good memory to be an evil genius like Zor.

Phoenix rummaged through a tool box that had been abandoned in a corner. “I didn’t expect to see you working for The Agency. It may be a bit cliche of me to say but, truthfully, I expected you to be dead by now. I’ll admit that I’m impressed.” Phoenix glanced at the screwdriver several times before an idea struck them. There weren’t any screws on the bomb, but the tip of the screwdriver was thin and flat. Not bad for prying things open.

They took a knee again. It was hard to get good leverage with the bomb on the floor so they kept it hovering at head height while they started trying to pry it open. Dr. Zor was still trying different angles to engage Ollie in conversation. “Perhaps I’m impressed enough to let bygones be bygones and allow you to work for me again.” That one did the trick.

“As tempting as that offer is I’m afraid I’ll have to decline on account of you trying to kill me.” When the metal finally gave way it was so sudden Phoenix almost fell. They pried the metal just a bit further until they could see the wires inside.

“Great job! Let’s see, it looks like there are 7 different colored wires… for Zoraxis bombs like that you just have to cut them in reverse rainbow order.” A bit weird, but ok. Phoenix got pliers from the tool box and began carefully cutting. The violet wire snapped in two.

“Whatever do you mean?” Zor continued as if their conversation hadn’t been interrupted by the engineering of their explosives being explained to an enemy. Phoenix cut the indigo wire. “Well, I wanted to excuse the whole leaving me at bottom of the ocean thing, you very well might’ve just forgotten and mistakes happen, but that escape pod was definitely a death trap. I was trying to keep track of all the OSHA violations but I lost count because of oxygen deprivation.”

“It was nothing personal, I assure you.” Blue wire. “That really doesn’t make it any better. Why did you even want me dead anyway?” Because you knew about the experiments, Phoenix thought. They were probably hoping you had just enough food to guard the place until Prism was dead. Then you’d starve so you couldn’t tell anyone about KBOOM. Ollie was very smart but sometimes it seemed like he was too kind to actually understand evil. Green wire.

“Even without the murder attempt a lot of the working conditions were just… bad. For all the issues The Agency has, they still try to prioritize the health of their employees. It’s hard in this line of work, but— Oh, Phoenix! Wait!” The agent froze. The blades of their open pliers surrounded the next wire perfectly still, like it was waiting for their orders to attack. “I know that wire looks like a somewhat orangey yellow, but according to Zoraxis manufacturers, that’s actually just orange. The yellow one is brighter than that.” Phoenix quickly, but even more carefully than before, pulled their pliers away. While they were still too dizzy from adrenaline to understand anyone’s words, they were vaguely aware that Ollie had returned to his previous point. How on earth did he not lose his train of thought from almost exploding?

They broke free from their haze when Zor said “I see. What if I gave you a promotion? I could even make you one of my highest ranking operatives. You’d be paid far better and you’d have my protection.”

“I WAS DIRECTLY INVOLVED IN YOU BETRAYING PRISM!”

Phoenix began tuning them both out after that. It was very weird listening to them argue. It reminded them of being a kid at a friend’s house and awkwardly standing there as their friend argued with their parents. And while Ollie never actually gave anything away, it still made Phoenix cringe whenever he almost mentioned Agency secrets in his frustration.

They still payed a little attention to the fight. It really said a lot about Ollie’s skill as a handler that despite the high stakes of their missions this was the least collected they had ever seen or heard him. Zor slowly sounded more annoyed as they realized just how many of their secrets he’d shared and just how much they’d underestimated him. It was somewhat satisfying to hear some of Zor’s smug tone dissipate.

They only listened fully when Ollie said “Phoenix” or “agent.” They still needed his instructions for the next few steps. Plus, if they’d missed their name being called earlier, well, they wouldn’t still be in this strange situation. Their strategy worked pretty well. The only time it backfired is when Ollie started talking about how kind they were to him and how he was sure they’d agree his old conditions were fair. As nice as it was they wished that they could say please just leave me out of this.

After what was probably a few minutes though it felt far longer, the bomb was finally defused, and at the same time so was the argument. It seemed Ollie had run out of things to say and Zor was finally done provoking him. Phoenix could hear interference from Zor’s radio abruptly halt as they left without a word. They weren’t sure when they stood up in all the chaos but apparently they had, because the second there was quiet, the gravity of what happened finally hit them and pulled them down to their knees.

Oh no. They almost died, didn’t they? That wasn’t anything new but it was still always a little worrying. Ollie almost dying with them was new and definitely not something they liked. But what was really sinking in was what the argument with Zor actually implied. They were very secretive and would not like an old employee of their’s alive. Especially not if they were working for The Agency and especially if he was far more clever than they originally thought he was.

Come to think of it… why did they target this building? Zoraxis as an organization would probably attack any Agency HQ they discovered but didn’t Zor say something about having a “personal interest” in this particular attack? It seemed like they genuinely weren’t expecting Phoenix so they weren’t the target. Zor knew a deserter was here. Phoenix didn’t know how but they were sure of it. Again, Zor’s struggle to recognize Ollie did seem very real, so they probably didn’t know who their ex-employee was. They know now though. Zor even successfully started an argument to get more information about him although it got a little out of hand.

This location would be abandoned now that it was compromised. Even so, Phoenix decided that as soon as they got in contact with Reginald they would tell him to get Ollie a private and well hidden office like their’s. Handler was a job with a lot of official paperwork and a lot of it had to be filled out at headquarters, but even frequent trips to one would be better than staying there all the time.

Phoenix was willing to bet Ollie didn’t realize how much danger he was in so right now it was up to everyone else to keep him safe. He helped a lot of people in this Agency. The Agency could spare a few recourses to help him. If they didn’t, then they would get a proper demonstration of just how terrifying their top agent can be. Reginald always said they were intimidating. Something about stoic silence.

#Dang I used a lot of italics in this #handler ollie au #ieytd fanfic #agent phoenix ieytd #dr. zor #ieytd ollie #oneshot #ieytd #fun fact: Phoenix's sudden realization at the end was inspired by my own thoughts when I was planning this fic #I just thought it would be interesting to see Ollie and Zor interact in this au and funny to have Phoenix awkwardly trying to do their job #but then it occurred to me. Zor wouldn’t just leave Ollie alone after finding out everything he’s been doing.#then I realized that Zoraxis might have figured out a deserter was there and that fixed a bunch of potential plot holes #so now this au has a fun little conflict :)#tw bomb #tw death mention #ieytd 3 spoilers #ieytd au

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bookwyrminspiration · 6 months

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Cinderpelt: you should stop focusing on your dreams of that dead medicine cat and start focusing on the cat right in front of you, the one the whole clan knows is very fond of you

Fireheart:

#warrior cats #hilarious development in the wcs world folks!#don’t particularly care about fireheart and sandstorm myself yet #BUT!#seeing everyone’s reactions to them has been HILARIOUS #they’re very awkwardly and sweetly interacting and everyone’s just staring st them amused #trying not to laugh #because They Know #it’s great

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stardustdiiving · 7 months

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Anyone else get so mad when u make a friend on the internet and they are like the coolest and sweetest person and one of the best friends u have ever had but they mention being around ppl offline who just seem like the worst and make them feel really socially abnormal and like they’re someone who no one wants to be friends with and ur just like. *Clenches ur fist.* *Violently shakes everyone who exists around said friend* why do YOU get to be the one whos lucky enough to exist in physical proximity to this person when u don’t even NOTICE they r literally one of the coolest people of all time. This is so unfair. I live one billion miles away from them Im already so chuffed to have them in my life at all I would be over the moon if I got to be around them in person regularly and u treat them like an annoying nuisance and don’t respect them?!?!?! what are you ON. WTF.

#fern.txt #it’s like winning the lottery and beinf mad about it. i cannot believe this #see sometimes my internet friends will be like see if I saw u in person I would want to be ur friend so bad based off #good vibes but I’d be nervous approaching u and I’m like don’t worry I think I would also notice u having #great vibes and march over to u and awkwardly try to initiate an interaction and it would be hilarious and work sitll

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oscill4te · 8 days

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people who are pushy about making you take food (or any gift) creep me out

#a customer kept trying to make another customer in front of him take a slice of pizza even tho she clearly didnt want it #like. weirdly fucking pushy.shut it down awkwardly and wz like hi. okay sir. your totallll isss (gave her an opportunity to gtfo of there)#just interrupted him basically in a customer service way #it gave me the ick. idk. its weird... if i described the whole interaction you'd think its also creepy i think....

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hypaalicious · 2 years

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Some good tips I definitely did not figure out until I played most of a year of Twisted Wonderland:

Save your LP refill items for events that require you to farm lessons for event coins. I used to blow through them when I first started because the grind is REAL in this game, but once you get a decent roster it’s best to just stockpile.

Save your macarons/cupcakes/waffles/sugar for Training Camps. You’ll get the biggest bang for your buck, then. I used to blow through them in regular lessons too cause leveling EXP is ASS without them but… not the greatest use of items.

R cards can be your friend. In fact, they carried me through exams and most early content no problem. If you resolve to only use SRs/SSRs from jump you will not have enough mats to flesh out your roster quickly.

Save alchemy tokens for spellbooks. They are STINGY in this game! 😩

Spell scaling is super ambiguous; it won’t matter if your spell goes from level 1 to 2, but it will matter if the spell evolves from like Leaf Blast to Forest Strike. So pay attention to phrases like, “spell changes at level 5/10” and only use spellbooks to reach those benchmarks.

Card level does more for DPS than spells, so if you have to choose what to do first, just level your card and worry about tweaking the spells later. Unless it’s an SSR; you’ll wanna level that second spell up to 5 for Duo Magic!

When leveling cards, pick one character and stick with them as a lesson partner until you reach 1000 lessons so you can net an easy 50 gems. Don’t skip around like I did at first 🥲 I woulda had a lot more gems by now if I was smart LOL

Pay attention to the card type: Defense will be a tank but won’t do shit for DPS. Attack cards will be glass cannons. Balanced cards bring the best of both worlds.

During event shop things, save event currency to buy the keys first, then the SSR/SR Awakening potions, then any SR event card dupes. I don’t recommend buying the event R card dupes only because you’ll get a shitton of R awakening potions doing normal pulls or completing Twistune missions so saving event currency for the most rare things makes sense.

Only use your SSR/SR level uncap potions on event cards if you can help it. Those will be the hardest to get dupes on cause they’re limited.

Unless you will die without having your bias, refrain from pulling on standard banners. Event banners are more rare and anything in the standard pool has a chance to spark while you’re pulling for something else.

Please have one favorite, for the sake of your pocketbook. Especially if you’re F2P. You will not be able to get everyone’s cards. 🥲

The only thing worth buying with real money in the gem shop is the 30-day pass. The rest have HORRIBLE value, imo. I know I’m spoiled to shit by games like Arknights and PAD but twst is not that generous.

How to know if you pulled an SSR; watch the beginning animation of the pull(s). If Grim is on the balcony of the castle when it pans up, you got yourself an SSR. The mirror also says a different phrase than usual.

Twistunes suck, but you can make them suck slightly less by going into options and choosing “Light” setting. The distracting background animations will be minimized and you can actually focus on hitting them damn notes. 😑 Also, watch the demos so you can see what the timing or mechanics are. The Purple twistune mechanic is a MENACE and I simply refuse to do them past the bare minimum. The music don’t hit like that for me to justify putting myself through that torture.

Basic exams judge you on how much DPS you throw out. Defense exams judge you on how much HP you have left at the end. You’ll also wanna time it so that you defeat the other team on round 3 or 4, with your hardest hitting card for the highest possible score. Do NOT attempt Hard mode unless you got some sleek ass high leveled back to back Duo magic cause the difficulty spike is not a joke.

Playing on your phone and you listening to music or get a notif right before lessons start? Reload the game and turn off your other audio or else the game will glitch out and you’ll lose a lesson point. The reason for that is how they trigger lesson starts: by voice line. So if the game don’t pick up that the voice line started because you have music or any other app that has sound playing in the background, it won’t start the lesson. Learned this the hard way. 🥲

#there’s probably more but this is just off the top of my head through experience #btw this Vargas camp event is killin me smalls #why do I still not have enough mats to level these event card spells!! I’ve been grinding FOREVER #the event itself was funny as hell tho 😂#if there’s one thing twst is good at it’s character interactions and localization #like hats off to the narrative designers frfr #they don’t have awkwardly translated phrases trying to keep with the Japanese too hard #now granted that DOES mean you can’t use the dialogue as direct meaning to the Japanese but it still flows really well #okay it’s 3:30am ima go to bed LOL

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in-tua-deep · 11 months

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why are my nap dreams always so strange

just had a dream where a future version of Emmet Pokemon from an apocalyptic future who was mostly robot and had a voice like the dramatic announcer in a movie trailer traveled back in time to undo something? Also the setting didn’t seem to really have any pokemon in it?

and there was a scene where he kind of. awkwardly stood around because he wasn’t sure how to approach people and get the ball rolling because it wasn’t a video game where the protagonist just kind of comes up to you and you can drop the relevant information on them?

so he eventually found his past self and engaged him in conversation where he started hinting that a new technology company on a meteoric rise was... using the ashes of “smothered people” to somehow power their technology, with the implication that people were going missing - which started with the employees of the company early on or something? Also it sounded like ashes might also be a name for a byproduct that happened during the smothering process and not literal ashes maybe?

it was also implied that future!Emmet had, over the years, killed like. a lot of people in the apocalyptic future, and there was a conversation beat where past Emmet assumed he killed over 50 people and then the camera kind of. zoomed in on each of them one at a time and gave me their thoughts, which was future!Emmet thinking “oh it’s WELL over 50″ while past!Emmet was like “i assume it’s well over 50, probably more like 1,999+”

by the way, past!Emmet does NOT know this is a future version of himself (looks different bc of being mostly robot) and comes to the conclusion that this might be one of the smothered people who underwent the smothering process and it either failed or he escaped, and i still have no idea what the fuck that means but apparently all records of smothered people just fuckin. vanish as well. and this dude clearly would NOT be in any system at all

then my cat stepped walked across my stomach and woke me up before i could unpack all of that but what a bizarre fuckin nap dream

#apocalyptic emmet dream #dream journal #my dreams #i just remember the scene where it zoomed in on each one and gave me their thoughts about future!emmet's kill count so clearly #and also the scene where future!emmet just kind of. awkwardly stands in a corner for a hot second because no one is coming up to talk to him #but hey what the fuck is smothering. what the fuck technology is being powered by ashes.#i also kind of got the implication that future!emmet was alive against his will because of the robot parts keeping him alive?#i did try drift back into sleep to see if i could fade back into the dream but my brain just went on a tangent #about how sometimes characters have to have their own growth and realizations outside of interactions or conversations with other characters #i distinctly remember the phrase 'we have character growth at home' being used #i'm also trying to figure out who emmet killed.#did he kill robots?#are the robots secretly people like cybermen from doctor who????#i am just SO PUZZLED by the implications of this conversation and what the fuck it meant for the worldbuilding #i do love a good outside POV dream where i am not even a character i do find them very funny

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