sometimes i remember back when miyuri's event got announced and people on here were going "please tell me this is a mistranslation" and i was like. sorry but フェチ is 100% "fetish" and 足 is either feet, legs, or paws, so pick your poison

On Elain, Gwyn and their apparent romantic worthiness.

TW: mentions of death, violent or sexual assault, infertility and pregnancy/childbirth related trauma. Please do not proceed if these topics bother you.

Disclaimer: please, please engage with this post with kindness. I promise I am not writing it to stir the pot, but because I - and many others - are fed up with seeing hurtful and harmful rhetoric spewed by the fandom, yet having no back up when dealing with it. Word vomit incoming, I'm sorry. This has been bothering me for a while.

My love to everyone who has been hurt by things they've read in this fandom. 💜

It's 2024 and I cannot believe we are still seeing posts, almost daily, about both of these women; all giving reasons why they cannot possibly be with Azriel. And I don't mean the debatable but utterly harmless discussions about Elain not looking good in black or Gwyn blabbing to Merrill when asked not to. Whatever, go nuts. I mean the truly horrific takes based around things these two women have had no control.

Now, my post history makes it very obvious where I stand in terms of ships, and yes, I'm well aware I've spoken before about the inherent power imbalance - that I perceive - which would exist if Azriel ever became involved with any of the priestesses in the women's shelter he is charged with protecting (to be clear, that's not me suggesting that Gwyn and her story isn't powerful, or powerful representation to those who see themselves in her, nor is it personal to Gwyn, or indicative of any of the sheltered priestesses and their ability to heal; it's purely a function of Azriel's position of authority over their sanctuary). I want to reiterate that my stating my feelings about this was never done with the intent to shame people who do ship them; we all ship who we like, and real world ethics should rarely come into it.

That being said, the following, in my opinion, is one of those times.

Firstly, I just want to say that lived experience informs how we interpret fiction, so please let me clarify something: the people who have said that they don't think Gwyn is ready for a relationship yet, and that NSFW fan art of her with anyone makes them uncomfortable, are not in any way in the wrong. They're simply the other side of the coin to those who find it empowering, and both are valid responses, often related to personal trauma. The problem lies with those very few who say that Gwyn could never have a romantic relationship, and call those who talk and/or post about it "gross." Some have called her "damaged goods." This is absolutely wrong and whoever is doing it needs to stop.

The entire fandom, even those who find romantic or NSFW content involving Gwyn uncomfortable to consume, frequently acknowledges that her trauma doesn't define her, and of course she should be able to enjoy love whenever she feels ready for it. Those who say otherwise are readily condemned from all corners. I've seen it happen and called the people out myself, as have many other Elriel shippers when necessary. However, Elriels are still very regularly and very publicly blamed for the actions of a few (some of whom I truly believe are burner accounts wanting to cause chaos, with their Elriel themed usernames and no post history), despite our largely collective action to call them out when we see it.

Could we do better? Absolutely, but so can you!

Because, on the other hand, I've noticed that, whenever I or others have tried to explain why the pliable bones "theory" - which attempts to reason that Elain could never be endgame with Azriel, as she and any baby would die during the course of pregnancy or childbirth - is equally as harmful, we are met with people publicly and wholeheartedly refusing to understand why (especially recently). Some horrific comments have been made to my friends, not to mention all of those I see well after the fact, which are never widely condemned by any but us. People will argue back that we're wrong, and have even suggested we're weaponising infertility! On Mothers' Day, of all the fucking painful days to say that.

Some of the push back I've seen recently includes:

"Nobody has said Elain is infertile."

No, nobody has, and that's not what we're saying or have ever said. We know you don't think this, as the Elucien fandom loves to write and draw Elain and Lucien's hypothetical future children (which is super understandable, as this is a romantasy fandom after all - no shame, enjoy your warm fuzzies).

What we are saying is that, if it's true that Elain's anatomy wasn't changed as Feyre and Nesta's was - and to be clear I cannot stand that entire plot, I wish SJM had chosen literally any other reason why Feyre's pregnancy was dangerous, as it is simultaneously degrading and doesn't fit with her previously established lore - then Elain and Azriel, together^, would be functionally infertile. Yet it's only ever framed as Elain's body not being able to work with Azriel's, never the other way around.*

^Why didn't the bat boys have to sacrifice their wings to keep their wives/mates safe? Why did the women have to change their anatomy? Because it would make it harder for them to be all powerful? Well Nesta sacrificed her powers! Why not just have Feyre be cursed by an enemy or something, and Nesta found a way to use the Dread Trove to save them all. Ugh. I love SJM's books, but this was such a miss.

*HOSAB/HOFAS SPOILER: funnily enough, this was never said about Ruhn and his eventual mate, even though he actually did think he may be unable to father children, thanks to the Oracle's prophecy. People shipped the hell out of him and a couple of different women throughout the CC series, despite the chance he could never get them pregnant.

"People haven't called Elain damaged goods, so it's not the same. We're allowed to not like her."

My faerie porn* lover in christ, what the fuck do you think the pliable bones "theory" is actually doing? It is suggesting that Elain's hypothetical inability to survive having children with Azriel, and for those children to also survive childbirth, is impaired. Ergo, she's damaged.

We don't care if you don't like Elain, we're allowed to have different preferences in characters and ships. That has never been the problem.

*I use this term with affection as a great lover of the genre.

But "damaged" vs a functionally "impaired" uterus? It's the same damn thing, and sorry, it's misogynistic af, not to mention ableist and homophobic at a minimum. In the same breath you are also reducing your favourite to her apparently functional uterus (even though the pliable bones argument is medically inaccurate, by the way - this is really damning of the state of health education across so many countries).

"Hahaha/lol."

Yes, I have seen people laugh and treat this as a joke. As recently as tonight, in fact. It's disgusting.

Regardless of your lived experiences and shipping preferences, both of these takes about Elain and Gwyn are equally degrading and horrific and need to stop, but if you're only calling out the comments that hurt you/your friends/your ship and not the others, then you should maybe attempt some basic self reflection and analyse those double standards you're carrying.

This entire fandom needs to do better. I'll say again, for the umpteenth time, to any of my fellow Elriels that if you think mocking Gwyn's past is funny, then you're not mature enough to read an adult series. But this works both ways, and if you think mocking infertility is funny/use it as a win, then you're just as immature. I would really and truly appreciate it if we were not left alone to argue over and over again why discriminating against someone who couldn't "have a man's children" is wrong, and why many, many people in this adult fandom - that is largely comprised of women! - might find such a theory, and the resulting discourse, incredibly upsetting.

Infertility hurts; not having a kid when you want one can be viscerally painful. Besides that, I know very few people who have given birth who don't carry around some sort of emotional or physical trauma from doing so. Treating a character's hypothetical infertility with one man as a joke is gross.

Please don't call Gwyn "damaged goods" or suggest that Azriel would choose somebody else over Elain because she couldn't have his kids.

They are the same thing.

It's not hard to be kind. Pain is not a competition.

We should all do better, and take care of each other.

unsanitary

.

.

.

i think i have hit a point where my mental state is bad enough that i don't even have the energy to wash off menstruation blood that drenches my underwear lmao. it's been almost 24 hours and all i did was lie down, not caring about the mess down there. this is a new low for me. i thought not bathing for a week was bad enough, so i didn't expect my exhaustion to reach an even lower point.

damn. i have no official diagnoses (because the one time i tried to seek help, i chickened out from admitting my struggles, since a lot of them manifested in hygiene issues. mainstream mental illness acceptance only acknowledges crying in the dark (which isn't exactly accepted either, i'm well aware. i have that as a symptoms myself. i know the acceptance is mostly performative). but people don't even want to those with hygiene issues even performatively, so yeah.), so i honestly doubt myself a lot and think that what i'm experiencing is just normal human experience. but i don't think the average human would stand having menstruation blood for almost a day and would do their best to overcome their disgust, so yeah. then again, i have never been the most sanitary person (i really struggle a lot with hygiene since i was a kid, so maybe i just developed extreme tolerance towards stuff like this), so i'm not surprised that even this isn't enough to kickstart my motivation and energy to shower.

honestly, it's funny. one blessing in this situation is that i feel zero internalized shame. it is what it is, grossness doesn't diminish my worth as a human being. it just is. but i do fear judgment from others, so i always keep this part of my self secret, even to mental health professionals. and sometimes i also think, if hygiene issue was such a normal part of my life, does it even count as a proof that i'm struggling? as in, if a math genius suddenly struggles with it, there's probably something wrong with them. however, if they've always been bad at math, then them not being able to answer a math question probably doesn't indicate anything serious... maybe? something like this, but with me and hygiene issues.

i don't know what i even want about this ask. i just wanted to let it out, i guess? i have a lot of stuff that i desperately want to let out and vent about, but this one is one of the things i genuinely can't see anyone receiving well without judging me, so i might as well let it out anonymously

Hi anon,

I'm so sorry to hear about what you've been going through.

It can definitely be hard to admit your struggles, especially when there's a worry someone may find it shameful or gross, even though you have nothing to feel ashamed about. What you're experiencing is real and valid.

Please know you're not alone. Hygiene has also been a big issue for me due to depression, and I agree that this subject should be alongside societal discussions about depression.

I think it's good that you don't feel any internalized shame about this, because you don't have to, nor would it be productive. You're right that this doesn't diminish your worth as a human being. That being said, your fears of judgment are valid and common. When I took Intro to Counseling last semester, the professor asked by a show of hands how many people were afraid of being judged, and everyone raised their hands. What might be helpful to ask yourself is, what is it about being judged that you might be afraid of? Because someone judging you for this doesn't mean they're necessarily right to do so, or that you should feel ashamed about what you're going through. You may find helpful this article on REBT's concept of irrational ideas, particularly the bullet points for the first one.

I hope things have gotten better since you wrote in. Feel free to let us know how things have been going.

If anyone else has any comments or suggestions, feel free to add on. Otherwise, I hope I could help, and please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

Let me give you my life

Pairing: Loki x Tesseract

Warnings: Major Character Death, Mourning, delusions, mental illness, alcohol, Original Character Death, Odin, fantastic racism

Summary: After Frigga's funeral, Loki starts hearing a voice. It changes their life completely.

Chapter 2: Verse 2

Chapter warnings: alcohol, depressive symptoms, fantastic racism, stuttering written by someone who doesn't stutter

Chapter summary: in which the Stone starts to influence

Previous chapter, AO3, next chapter

My church offers no absolutes / she tells me "worship in the bedroom" / the only heaven I'll be sent to / is when I'm alone with you

"How was the dining with the good masters?" the Tesseract asks. Loki swears it's sarcastic.

"Terrible. The ones that didn't demand for me to leave were whispering and staring, and some even pitied me… I should have never told Odin that you showed me," they sigh as they lay down, seiðr creating a glass of wine in their hand. Usually, his magic has a tickling sensation, playful and livid. But since Frigga's death, it's numb.

"You're right, I don't belong here… I don't belong anywhere…" they sigh, staring into the goblet with the red liquid. Perhaps, if he could find the strength to end it all…

"No, this is not the solution to your problems. You won't find your family there," it cuts off the train of thoughts before Loki can even process it.

"The only person I ever knew as family is there, Tesseract. Why can't I join?" they don't cry from the mention of Frigga, they haven't done it for weeks. He's just as numb as his magic now, the talks with the Tesseract and goblets of wine being the only things that can make him feel something, but they start weakening too.

"She lied to you, like Odin did. They taught you your magic, yes, but also how to hide what you feel and who you are. She is to blame for the nothingness you feel now, just like Odin is. Tell me, is that what family does?" it argues.

Loki opens their mouth, but closes it again. "No… then, what do I do?" he asks, staring at nothing.

"You live, until you find something worth dying for," it responds, voice softer than ever. He just scoffs and brings the golden goblet closer to his lips.

A blue light makes the goblet vanish before Loki can take a sip, filling them with the dark red liquid. "Hey! That's my favourite tunic, you needn't stain it!" He glares at the top right corner of his chamber.

"You have not taken it off for a week,"

"Because it's my favourite tunic,"

The stone lets a sigh. "Go take a bath, change to your second favourite tunic, try eating something that's not wine and act like you're the heir of two thrones for once or I'll teleport you to Muspelheim and let you burn,"

Loki sighs and gets up, following the shower order (especially because they've started to feel their hair going oily and gross). He had almost missed the feeling of scorching hot water on his skin, even though it started to hurt since his Jötunn form came to the surface.

When they walk back into their chamber, damp hair dripping on their second favourite tunic, they spot a tray of fruits and tea on their bed. "Thank you, Tessie," he smiles and sits beside it, his stomach begging for him to raid it.

I was born sick, but I love it

"I am not negotiating. Not until this monster is out of your house!" Gæirasson spits, small vacant eyes glaring at Loki. They don't shift their face or posture, but the room still freezes.

"Please, reconsider your words. One should not offend a prince like this," an elf notes, as if Loki cannot speak for himself.

"You're to ask for permission before you speak, Gæirasson will only get angrier with you." Odin had told them before the council.

"Please, learn how to manage your fury. You'll start a war without realising it if you keep going like that," Frigga had said countless times.

"A prince of monsters, yes. Isn't worth any more than the Giants I've sent to Hel," the outrageous man growls.

"Do not let him speak to you like this, you're worth much more than these words," the Tesseract says. Loki breaks his posture to take a deep breath, and then turns to Odin with a calm face.

"Father, may I answer to those words the way they deserve to?" they ask, never breaking the collected face. It fools Odin enough to nod a yes.

And Loki lets a grin appear, showing his fangs.

The water inside the goblets turns into ice as Loki rises from their seat, pale skin fading to reveal a blue and marked one. With his new height and black horns, he barely fits in the room, bloodshot eyes glaring at the old man enough to make him think that the thin irises would turn into daggers and stab him.

The man shivers, but not from the cold

"We are not afraid of your riches or your army and your bravado is fooling no one, G-Gærasson," they state, not breaking eye contact as their tongue strammers.

"You think you can scare me when you can barely speak, Giant?"

The negotiation table breaks in half as Loki slams his hand on it. "You have spoken enough!" they yell, summoning a new wave of shivers down the lord's body.

"You will leave this room unharmed only because of my mercy, and you know well that your words have given me every right to kill you right here and right now. You want to bring war to my house, I don't give a fuck. You know why? Because we both know very well that I can chop your soldiers to pieces without using neither my Frostbite nor seiðr and with ease. Go ahead and start a war, I have no problem to end it. The only demand the palace has is for you to pay us with the gold you owe and get lost. Or else, your house will cease to exist and will stay in history only as an example of what happens to those who anger me!" he growls, never breaking eye contact with the lord and not mouthing a single lie. Gæirasson loses his colour, stands up and leaves, panting like a dog.

"Loki, enough. You have your war, are you satisfied?" Odin asks after the door closes.

Loki's fiery eyes turn to the king.

"Satisfied? You should be the one to do this! This man offended our house and the throne greatly, they canonically deserve execution! And you made me sit there like a coward and listen to those insults!" they yell, this time out of frustration. The old Loki would never raise his tone at Odin, good thing he's gone.

Odin takes a deep breath, trying to keep themselves under control. "My son, I understand that you're going through a bad time, but there's no need to lash out like this. Would your mother like seeing you growling and yelling and cursing like a sailor?"

"You have no right to bring her up, she has nothing to do with it!" Loki's fury only gets wilder after this. But Odin does not coward away.

"I said enough! Shut your mouth and leave right now! And you'll be in charge of the war, since you can end it with such ease," he yells back, ten times louder and more intense. Loki lets the Æsir glamour return but doesn't lower themselves more as they walk away.

"You started a war, do you regret it?" the Tesseract asks as long as they're alone in a corridor. Loki grins.

"Not a bit."

Command me to be well / Amen, Amen, Amen

Loki walks around in his room, his fingers picking up each other once again. They tried to quit this habit after Frigga's death, but to no avail.

"Te-te-tesseract," he calls out, biting his tongue at the stutter. Since they've started the war, this annoying stutter has come back at full force, probably from the stress.

"You summoned me, Entropy?" it asks, more like states. Usually, Loki would find comfort only with the stone. But now, it only makes him move nervous.

"Y-y-yes. I did-I did call you to-to…" they puff out some air, closing their eyes with shame.

A hand grabs his hands, making them calm down. Loki raises their head to face an illusion of the Tesseract, trying to mimic contact.

It's a form of a body, tall and lean and glowing blue. Its eyes are looking at him with sympathy, face soft. It's the most breathtaking person Loki has ever seen.

"You can speak freely with me, don't fear," it smiles, tilting its head. Loki lets out a sigh.

"You said that, w-wh-when I'm r-ready, I-I'll agree to your-to your commands. I-I am ready," they speak, not even trying to mask up some confidence.

"I'm glad to hear. But, you'll have to acknowledge that there'll be a cost-"

"I don't care. I-I've lost ev-ev-everything already. You're th-th-the only one left," he lowers his head.

The hand moves to their face, cupping their cheek and brushing its thumb against their cheekbone, huge blue eyes staring into them. He can't help but tilt towards the hand, closing his eyes and breathing slowly.

"Perhaps you shouldn't… I've caused you enough pain, why seek out for more?" it doubts. It's almost funny, listening to doubt in a voice Loki knew to be so determined.

"I-I-I'm sure. Ple-please," they whisper, opening their eyes again. The form nods.

"Very well, Entropy," the serious and awe striking voice Loki knows returns, moments before the blue form vanishes in a light.

My Last Word on Gillovny/Gilligan/UGH

Or a treatise on double standards, confirmation bias and FOR FUCKS SAKE IT’S NONE OF OUR BUSINESS.

I KEEP getting asks about this, and on anon so I can’t answer privately so this is the post that I go out on in terms of trying to explain myself. I will just link back to this.

Yes. I used to be be Gillovny. Pretty hardcore, it’s a lovely freindship and I’m a romantic. But then the landscape changed, and gradually so did my view. Now, if I had to put money on it, I guess I’d back Peter Morgan, but I also refuse to reduce any woman, especially one as boss ass as Gillian Anderson, to who she is dating. 

The rest is going under the cut. Beware, I may use actual rational reasoning so if that kinda stuff offends you, look away and unfollow me, because I am done with the Trump style “information” and “fact” going around.

Why I started believing in Gillovny: The first non MSR interaction I saw between GA & DD was Kimmel. It was cute, there seemed to be a lot of cute, I’m a romantic, their history is interesting, their friendship lovely and neither of them was linked to anyone else.

Why I stopped believing in Gillovny (the romance): It stopped adding up. For me, the fact that there have never been any public sightings, and that they denied it was always my sticking point. While all the other “evidence” was cute, add someone that Gillian is being seen with to the mix and suddenly the balance switches. So I stepped back, but I still believed I could participate in the “gillovny” fandom, by appreciating their wonderful friendship.

Turns out I was wrong.

And here’s why.

The second I posted a picture of Gillian and Peter Morgan, at an actual real life thing where they both were, just because it was a nice picture, I had people screaming at me for shoving it in their face, for being gross, anting to know why I would believe they were dating.

And I was like WHUT. I thought maybe it was kneejerk, people upset that maybe the thing they’d shipped might not be real. I figured it would calm down. I left it alone.

But as time passes, it hasn’t, all that has happened is the fandom has been arbitrarily divided in to “us” and “them”. “Us” being the people who still ardently believe in Gillovny, and them being.... well anyone else.

And even that wouldn’t be so bad, I don’t expect people to agree with me on everything but I do expect them to respect my space, and respect the people they claim to care about. Which is what is not happening anymore.

THE DOUBLE STANDARD OF “PROOF”

This is how it works.

If Gillian is seen with a man at an event.

The man is DD - OMG! CUTE! THEY’RE IN LOVE!

The man is PM - UGH. Promo. Get him off my dash.

So far not so bad right? People don’t have to like PM. That’s fine, They maybe shouldn’t be so damn rude about his looks because, are we really that shallow, but people are gonna be nasty. But then the other side of the coin.

If Gillian is seen without a man at an event.

If the absent man is DD - well of course - they are keeping their love a secret. They have to.

If the absent man is PM - see, they're not together, if he loved her he would be there to support her work.

Umm... this doesn’t add up. And it gets more ridiculous.

The fact that Gillian and David have not been seen, spotted, given a joint anything since August last year.

Gillovny - Well that’s because we know that when they’re both quiet they’re together. Their love is secret remember.

Gilligan - Have been seen. Multiple times. And photographed. But this has been explained away by a (frankly insane) theory about cross promotion.

This is just the beginning, the double standard runs so deep (handholding for “Gillovny” is proof that they’re together. For “Gilligan” it’s him dragging her like an animal. Gillian looking happily at DD is eysex, at PM it’s “oh she’s looking over his head at someone off camera”). 

It. is. insane. 

But the thing is, a lot of us here are a little insane. So I wouldn’t even hold that against the people who want to stay in the Gillovny camp. YOu can believe what you want to believe.

Where I CANNOT stand by, is at the double standard facing bloggers.

THE DOUBLE STANDARD OF ACCOUNTABILITY

I get it, Gillovny is old, it will probably always have a place in some people’s hearts. But that does NOT mean it is right, or that talking about, or posting pictures of either Gillian or David with anyone else is in someway “wrong”.

I regularly have to scroll pass Gillovny RPF on my dash, it skeeves me out these days, but I scroll past. I’m a big girl.

But when a photograph, an actual literal, real life picture of two people at an event is posted, and reblogged, it’s as if the people reblogging it have posted snuff porn images or something. 

This literally happened. You can interpret it how you like, but implying that reality is shameful/gross/equivalent to RPF/headcanons is so fucked up. It just so happens that the most recent pictures of Gillian in public have Peter Morgan in them. So as a Gillian blog I am going to reblog them. Deal with it. 

People are entitled to their stories. But they should acknowledge them as such. Opinions, and strings of coincidences with a nice narrative are not the same as “the truth”. You can’t ask for a pass for your shipper headcanon and then reject actual happenings as gross and inappropriate. That’s ridiculous.

And it gets worse, because here is the kicker.

IT’S FINE TO TRY AND CONVINCE PEOPLE GILLOVNY IS REAL, TO ACTIVELY PROMOTE THE THEORY AS TRUTH. BUT YOU CAN’T EVEN MENTION THAT PETER MORGAN EXISTS AS A HUMAN WITHOUT CALLING DOWN THE WRATH OF THE FANDOM

I have never seen posted, or posted myself, anything to try and “convince” anyone that Gilligan is real. I have reblogged pictures of them together, because they’re nice pictures. I have said Gillian looks happy, because she does, there are also lots of solo pics in my happy Gillian tag (Implying the only person she can look happy with is DD is just... nope. ) All I have done, is reblog reality with my thoughts, and the odd utterly ridiculous, obviously a joke, thing from the one blog that seems to have a sense of humour about the thing.

But I don’t message people on anon, or otherwise, and try and explain away their point of view. I don’t pick everything I see or hear about Gillian apart to try an prove my point or disprove the opinions of those who want to believe in Gillovny. Some blogs have made it their mission to analyse to death every image, tweet and maybe sighting to prove their point is valid. And every one of those blogs falls on the Gillovny side. Some days it makes me think that they lack the conviction of their own belief, to need to try and undermine anything that doesn’t fit their narrative, and other days I think they’re just bored, or grieving, but most days I try not to think on it at all. 

Instead, I just blog what I want to, try to be respectful, and am constantly flabbergasted to have that thrown back in my face.

If not believing in Gillovny makes me a bad person, then I guess I’m a bad person. If posting pictures of actual events makes me gross, then I guess I’m gross. If saying when things go to far, and pointing out inconsistencies of reason and blatant lies being peddled as fact is “bullying” then I guess I’m a bully.

But I don’t think I’m any of those things. I think I’m a thoughtful person, with my own mind, who tries to respect others but also stands up for decent behaviour and sound reasoning. I laugh at things that are funny, I yell at things that are gross and I often fuck up.

I will not be shamed into silence by a noisy minority, who seem to feel that their opinion is not only “fact” but a fact that everyone must buy into. I will not stop posting pictures that don’t “fit” into that world view. I will not apologise for laughing at what has become ridiculous. 

Because make no mistake, it has become a farce. Just because you say something enough times and all your friends say it too and loudly, that thing does not become true. Its the tactic Trump is employing, that we all ridicule him for but seem incapable of spotting in our own backyard. Facts and real happenings can’t be “fake”,. they’re facts. Dana Scully is rolling her eyes so hard at this right now that she’s likely sprained something.

In conclusion... if all this doesn’t sound like something you can stomach, unfollow me, block me, but just stay out of my inbox and off my posts. It’s tacky, and I hate it.

I don't get why some malec shippers are so pressed about people shipping jalec? Like we all know malec is canon why are you all so concerned about what people personally like and enjoy?? It's interesting that despite their ship literally being real they're so insecure about it that when someone ships their character with someone else they freak out

yeah, man, if everyone thought like you and i do, fandom would be a better place because ship wars wouldn’t exist. the single worst, stupidest thing about fandom is easily a ship war - even if they don’t call it that, that’s still what it is lol. unfortunately what a lot of people in fandom are best at is pitting people against each other for absolutely no reason, and they’re extremely good at it too (which, hey, at least they have, uh, something going for them)

my philosophy is “ship and let ship” - even if i don’t ship something, i don’t care if you do, it’s not my business, who cares who cares who caaaaaaares which fictional characters strangers on the internet like to think about and write about for fun?? how pressed do you need to be to make something so ridiculously insignificant your business and get all pissy and self-righteous about it lol

like, in terms of OTPs, i ship malec first and foremost (i shipped jalec casually for a bit at the start of s1 when alec actually had canon feelings for jace, and then alec’s “my brother” tirades as s2 began sort of got me out of it lol and now it’s just my #1 brotp), so i would never want to see alec with anyone except magnus. but why should i care if someone else thinks differently? what business is it of mine, right? especially given that malec is so very, extremely, incredibly canon (like…endgame, everyone’s OTP level canon), so who’s it really hurting lol

i feel like the jalec hate comes more from the magnus people than the alec people (not to throw magnus stans under the bus and i, as an alec stan, might be biased), and i totally get being upset with people who would make magnus’s character insignificant or try to demonize him or imply that he’s not good enough for alec - if people who ship jalec do those things then that’s absolutely fair enough to get upset about it. but, for the most part, come on, this is fandom. not everyone’s going to ship the same things you are, or look at things the same way, and that doesn’t mean that people are disrespecting your character or whatever it is you feel, right? 

 and you’re right about the fact that malec is not only canon but so extremely overwhelmingly popular….listen……there’s almost nobody in this fandom that doesn’t ship malec - there’s no reason to go after the few people that don’t. even a lot of people who like jalec also like malec, from what i’ve seen. like imagine not shipping malec in this fandom - you’re probably not having the best time anyway, and then people just act like assholes about it for absolutely no reason and i don’t get it tbh

and then, of course, as i mentioned in brief earlier, there’s the whole “brother” thing that has come up especially in the first couple of episodes of season 2, where people say that shipping jalec is incestuous. i can understand that perspective to an extent, (and like i said, it kind of put me off shipping jalec romantically) because adoptive siblings are still siblings, and alec clearly now considers jace to firmly be his brother in canon. but, again, if people want to ship it, i don’t have an issue with it, and i’m not going to go after people for it because it’s not my damn business - because it’s not, like, clary/sebastian where it’s, ya know, involving blood relationships. and especially because jace/alec was 50% canon for at least 9 of 13 episodes in season one, in that alec had actual feelings for jace that were 100% canon (although one-sided, reducing the canon level to the aforementioned 50% figure, if that makes sense). what’s more, these feelings were really important to his character arc in the first part of the first season. 

and, consummate alec stan that i am, i find it somewhat disrespectful to alec’s character as a guy who was really struggling and suffering with the guilt and shame of having feelings for someone like jace who was taboo to him for so many reasons by saying anyone who thinks those feelings were valid or real is gross or wrong or has an incest fetish or some such nonsense like that. 

(and, okay, they met each other when one was ten and the other approximately twelve. they weren’t necessarily “raised together” until they were on the cusp of teenhood - so that they consider each other brothers is totally, 100% valid like i said because adoptive relationships are still family relationships, but i don’t think it’s that bad if people ship it romantically, but maybe i’m just desensitized to all manners of things as a result of being in many, more gross fandoms before this one lol) 

like, also, listen. i don’t think people really understand why people like me - who ship malec - are a little iffy about how they never really wrapped up alec’s feelings on jace. the thing is, i’m first and foremostest an alec stan, and if you watch s1, especially the early part of it, through alec-tinted glasses, so much of his arc and personal character elements have to do with his feelings for jace, and then it didn’t get a whole of resolution. and rather than have them be naturally phased out as his interest for magnus grows - which i would have been totally fine with because that’s realistic and makes sense - it kept being brought up as late as episode 9 (when alec punched jace in the face for bringing it up, so that’s healthy) and then just completely dropped out of the blue by the next three episodes. and then he’s just 100% brother, no mention of those feelings that he so awfully struggled with. they did kind of do a bit of ship whiplash - shiplash, coining it now, nailed it - between having alec actually have feelings for jace to considering him his brother and nothing else, especially since they really played up alec’s feelings for jace (or maybe that was just matt daddario’s insanely well-acted longing stares @ jace that just sort of punched me in the gut every time, so i overstated their importance in my own mind, which is entirely possible). again, introducing magnus and starting to build the malec relationship makes sense as an impetus for affecting this change in the jace/alec relationship, but the one line that will always haunt me is the one in 1x09 - why bring it up if you were just trying to phase it outtttttttt

from an alec stan and a writing perspective, it sorta rubbed me the wrong way, but if they’re doing it this way, i have no problem and don’t want them to unnecessarily revisit it for no real reason other than to present a pointless, perfunctory “wrap-up” similar to the tacked-on resolution that was presented in the books where alec only “thought” he had feelings for jace. i’d much, much, much rather them go forward with malec if that’s what the intention is, because ultimately that’s where things should be and i don’t want them to get hung up on things that should have been wrapped up in the first season but weren’t. but wanting closure on an important arc for your favourite character isn’t a bad thing, either. i feel like these days people even acknowledging that alec’s feelings for jace were real in any way are considered “lol gross j*lecs who hate magnus and only want white men to get together lol”

Reylo is no more "unhealthy" or "problematic" than Finnrey - they're both noncanonical fictional ships, equal in every way. And every single antishipper spewing unsolicited hate should stand behind her words and take responsibility for them. Antishippers started the abuse - they should quit whining when it comes back to them.

Actually, yeah, nah. You see, these ships are not equal for the very reasons I discussed in the long post in addition to reasons I didn't add in for the sake of time because I felt I said all that needed to be said.And I hate to sound like a mother, but I don't care who started it. I'd rather fucking finish it but we all know there's no way it could happen. Even after posting about the root of the reason why this escalate into the diseased situation that it is, it's obvious nobody's really getting the point, preferring instead to focus on, "Well, I'M not hurting anyone blub blub blub."Frankly, it doesn't seem rational that, even if antis did start it, it was done out of malice. This sort of behavior is nothing new in any fandom and when you see patterns, it's easy to determine which kinds of personalities are the quickest to react poorly. People who genuinely due feel discomfort with reminders of their PTSD, and people who can recognize an overusage of gross sympathy to further promote a racial agenda by even a small amount? Yeah, sorry that they're hurting your feelings by pointing out the traits in your ship that caught their discomforted attention and do deserve analysis and criticism even behind just the fact that they recognize those traits as a part of their own experiences.If Finnrey and Reylo were equal in any way, there'd be no dispute on such a level. But here we are. I have yet to see or hear any stretching done for Finnrey, or any reason to ship Reylo that isn't determined by a set of thoughtless reasoning. "But it's fiction," you say. "It doesn't need a reason." Well, then why does Finnrey have to fight to keep root when at this rate it's very likely going to be canon?I also find it funny that suddenly the argument is "It's fiction, stop making a big deal of it." For multiple reasons. My biggest thing being the obvious: "If it's just fiction, then why do a lot of Reylos get butthurt about it when the disturbing aspects of the ship are brought up?" But, more importantly, even without promoting Finnrey, the actions taken to further support Reylo carry characteristics that, as I stated before, are reminiscent of the very actions we take in our day-to-day lives that continue to upload an agenda under which many people at a further disadvantage than others.I know that there are some antis that take it too far -- every group has its set of extremists and I mean EVERY. I know that there are Reylos who don't mean any harm. But consider this: by willingly interacting on a thing that promotes a primeval mindset towards interracial relations and the consideration of those suffering with a life-long disorder (of which they had no choice in obtaining), they ARE hurting people by further feeding into a system that they arguably don't quite acknowledge on a regular basis because it's never hurt them before (which sounds hella familiar to me).Also consider that Reylos need to quit whining when given explanations as to WHY and WHERE the discomfort towards their ship is warranted. Not making excuses like "It's fiction." Because if it was just fiction, people probably wouldn't attempt to flood an anti's submissions box with graphic imagery, or their inbox with slurs and PTSD-provoking insults about needing to get over it, or their own blogs about how Daisy is "clearly uncomfortable" whenever John touches her. But the fact is, this isn't the case. People go out of their way to do these things and it's not to be taken lightly. These actions extend beyond fiction and have real-world consequences. When that boundary is crossed, it's no longer allowed to hide under the "It's just fiction" excuse." (Hell, considering how much of society's ideologies are carried out through works of fiction, it's a shame more people take it so lightly. Shipping and how it's handled, no matter how cartoonish, can say a lot about what a person thinks or is willing to stand for, just as a person's favorite book might. So I don't wanna hear it.So y'all need to quit whining, stop bullshitting, and understand why I have to keep singing this damn song over and over because while I get where you're coming from, it's not a town with a good reputation. So stop your whining and sit quiet enough to understand why this shit keeps having to be said.TL;DR-Stop using "It's fiction" as an excuse to avoid the racial and abusive connotations of Reylo. If it was really just fiction, then you'd acknowledge them and eventually realize just how wrong it is on multiple levels, including the fact that promotion of this ship has gone beyond the world of fiction and into the real world as a means to hurt others mentally, emotionally, and socially. Intentional ignorance is not an excuse. If you wanna be treated right, act right.