Tom introduces a new craze to Voyager. This time: Rubik's cubes!

Tuvok and Seven figure it out easily, but dismiss it as irrelevant and a waste of time. (Seven keeps one anyway.)

Harry figures it out pretty quickly. It holds his interest for a few weeks, but when the craze dies down, he recycles his in favour of something more interesting.

The Doctor downloads the solution into his programme and shows off by solving them in seconds. Everyone is initially impressed, but they all know it's just code and not skill so they quickly get fed up.

Tom never quite figures it out, but he doesn't want to admit that to anyone since he introduced them in the first place, and a bunch of people caught on pretty quickly ... but he didn't.

B'Elanna's the only one who knows Tom can't solve it. She's better at it than he is, but finds them annoying so she doesn't bother to figure it out. She's fed up with Tom leaving unsolved cubes in her quarters, so she learns to solve them by taking them apart and putting them back together again. Tom thinks she actually knows how to solve them. He asks her to teach him, but she just gives him a superior smile and refuses.

Chakotay never bothers to try and learn. He'll pick up ones that crew members abandon in the Mess Hall and fiddle around with them while waiting for someone or something. He figures out how to solve one face, but leaves it at that.

Neelix borrows one of Tom's to try and learn, but he returns it a week later, apologising because he couldn't figure it out and had to return it scrambled.

Janeway is secretly fascinated by them. She spends her free time teaching herself to solve it, and soon enough she can do it without thinking. She doesn't tell anyone she's figured it out, but she does keep one tucked away in her Ready Room long after the craze is over. Solving it sometimes helps her think. Only Chakotay and Tuvok know.

Everyone is surprised by how quickly Naomi figures it out. Actually, she had Seven teach her. Tom asks her to teach him. He has to bribe her not to tell anyone, though, because he's embarrassed about asking a three-year-old child how to solve the thing he introduced everyone to.

Part 3 Invader Zim Fanfiction Review

Part 1 and Part 2 can be found here!

Before we get started, as always, please let me know if any of the links provided don’t work, so I can correct them as soon as possible! I also welcome recommendations! So if there’s a fic that you don’t see on any of the lists, that you think I (or anyone else) should check out, please share! This Hyper-fixation Train is not slowing down and I need enablers 8D

And as a friendly reminder, anything crossed out is considered a Spoiler so read those parts at your own risks! And on to the Review!

Maneem  Mekrelmar Danem Sempadinum Scarazial and Zaygam by @hecallsmehischild

This is a six part saga totaling 242,514 words. Originally posted on Fanfiction.net on an unknown date in the early 2000s and re-uploaded to Ao3 on 05-26-2016 and marked complete on 08-18-2016 (though the total write time was estimated 7 years). There are a total of 174 chapters.

I’m going to do something a little different with this one because it is a six part series. I’m mostly going to review it as one fic with a quick rundown of the different segments. So I’ll only provide the link for “Maneem” but you should easily be able to find the rest from the there. If I review each one individually, by the time I got to “Danem” and the others, they would all have to be scratched out due to spoiling revealed plot twists from both “Maneem” and “Mekrelmar”. However, because of how long and complex this whole thing is, I am going to need to delve a bit more in to spoilers than I like just to cover the over all plot, so be warned! I will say this series was AMAZING and would probably be best read blind! There are so many exciting twists and reveals and the Author (You may recognize from the Part 2 reviews such as “Spacejerk” and “Misdirection”) as always, is able to pull you into the story, make you fall in love with these characters, and does not pull any punches when it comes to emotional drama! I teared up during the epilogue! This Author has made me cry on two different occasions now!! If you love soap operas, you’ll love this series!  

“Maneem” We start off with Zim finding out that his mission on Earth was a joke. In a state of shock, he wonders out into the streets of his neighborhood. He is not wearing his disguise and is very obviously an Alien. Dib finally gets what he’s always wanted, and Zim is arrested. Zim then goes to court (stay with me here lol), and a Judge sentences him to spend 3 months living with a host family to prove that he is not a danger to society. If he fails to do so, then he will be surrendered to the Swollen Eyeball for them to do whatever they please. And this is where we meet Della, Tom, Mikko, and Tiana, they’re original characters that play very important roles throughout the whole saga, I love them all for different reasons but Della and Mikko are definitely my favorites <3! This is a Found Family Fic. Della and Zim’s interactions are rocky at first but so sweet and wholesome later on, and Mikko’s growth from a frightened mute little girl to a spitfire fighter is done so well and I just absolutely adore her! Although, in the beginning, there is definitely a lot of headbutting, as the saga goes on these characters become Zim’s family, and they really grow close. The first half of “Maneem” is mostly Zim settling in with this new family of his, so a lot of slice-of-life fluff and drama. But soon, Dib hacks into Zim’s PAK and reveals that Zim has had a truly horrific up bringing, complete with brutal torturous training and both emotional and physical abuse. One punishment Zim had to endure during training was being exposed to a new alien species called a Morflar. Morflars are like living shadows that hunt and eat Irkens, slowly killing them in the most bone chilling way possible. Morflars play a pretty big part later on. But something else is revealed in Zim’s memories that truly gets the plot moving! After seeing something truly horrific, Dib kidnaps Zim at gunpoint and forces the alien to take him to Irk for a rescue mission. Here is where we meet Gloria (I wont say much about her due to spoilers but I really fell in love with her and her relationships with other characters by the end of this saga!). A few things happen, and “Maneem” ends shortly after a second trip to Irk for a rescue is successful. Overall, “Maneem” is a pretty quick read, and due to its age (about 12 years old) it is missing a few of the finer details that the Author’s more recent fics have. However, even in these earlier chapters, the Author does such a great job with emotion and character interactions, that you hardly notice the jumping in scenes. And the writing style really improves later in the saga! It’s just obviously different from how the Author currently writes, so there’s a noticeable difference if you read their more recent fics first, but if you read this one first, then you wont even notice any of it, and you will truly be blown away when the writing improves later on. 

“Mekrelmar” takes place about two years later, basically Dib wants revenge for what happened to Gloria, and convinces Zim to reluctantly tag along. Chaos ensues and Zim ends up being left behind on Irk, leading to a bit of torture and another rescue. Here is also where the Swollen Eyeball starts to enter the story in a major way, though they really don’t start to shine until “Danem”. The Author also does something with Gaz’s character in this series that is absolutely enjoyable and clever! I will not spoil it but it’s clever and works so well with the world the Author builds here. Even if the reveal is a little out of the blue XD

“Danem” takes place five years later, and here is where a lot of crazy stuff really starts to happen! There was actually a real-life five year gap between “Mekrelmar” and “Danem”, so not only does the writing style improve, but the Author’s ability to foreshadow really shines here! You can tell that the next four segments were all well planed out, as a lot of different twists and mysteries are introduced and slowly hinted at, before finally being answered many many chapter later! You wont be able to put it down! We start to learn a bit more about what Gaz can do. And Zim just has an All Around No Good Very Bad Time with a lot of stuff, I know I say this a lot, but this Author is so good at emotional trauma!! We also get a special surprise in the form of a familiar bond reveal, the Author does such a great job with the reveal too, it’s hinted at and you can almost guess what it is, yet it still takes you by surprise when it is confirmed! I was screaming out loud with how well done it was, and how excited I was about the implications of what the reveal would mean for the rest of the story. Mikko also continues to get some character growth and I gotta say, I really do love her X3. There’s more stuff with the Swollen Eyeball as well, which gets dark just as a heads up, there’s a bit of gore and psychological damage. It’s all very well written! We’re also introduced to another new character who plays a larger part later on, Agent Tunaghost, she’s one of the few characters who actually uses logic and is smart enough to know that everyone else needs to see a psychologist lol.  Also, trying to avoid spoilers, the Author does an absolutely amazing job at a character redemption, someone who you absolutely despise in the first two segments becomes a beloved character in this one going forward. It’s so well done! This Author really writes trauma, angst, and emotions so well. Though fair warning, there is a Character Death in this segment. Towards the end of “Danem”, I really fall in love with a particular character and their behavior towards Zim (XD man it’s really hard to say stuff without spoiling it, like I don’t even want to name the character because that will spoil stuff from the first two segments)

“Sempadinum” takes place almost immediately after “Danem”, and it is an emotional roller coaster (lol I feel like I say this a lot, but seriously the Author is sooo good with making the reader feel for these guys!). It mostly focuses on Gloria’s recovery from all the horrible stuff that’s happened to her in the past, as well as a budding platonic relationship that I truly was platonicly shipping and gushing over by the end of the saga! When you read it, you’ll understand why I’m emphasizing platonic lol, but seriously I absolutely adore these two together! Tunaghost is again the only one to actively suggest a psychologist for these poor folks, too (and she’s 100% right). Also, the Earth is in danger (cause of course it is) from the Irken Armada, and the Author has a really clever way to save it that really got me gushing over this characterxcharacter relationship lol. Overall “Sempadinum” is very well written, with great character development and exploration of their emotions and traumas. Plus there’s so much happening plot wise, that I can’t even touch on because of spoilers!! And sooo much foreshadowing shows up that isn’t answered until very far down the road, showing that the Aurthor planned everything out and did such a great job writing it all! We also start to get a few more hints on the Big Bad that first appeared in “Danem”, though we wont really see them till much later, and let me tell you, You will Never Guess the true identity of this Big Bad! But once they’re revealed, the hints laid out up to that point can be puzzled out. Lot of hindsight needed though XD

“Scarazial” takes place immediately after “Sempadinum” with a very heart wretchingly emotional wedding. We’re also introduced to Riddick, who is an absolute delight! As with a few other character introductions in this saga, Riddick starts out a bit as a jerk (though absolutely fun), trust me, you’ll love him by the end! With a few more appearances from the Big Bad, and a few other mysteries that need to be solved (that I can’t hint at cause it involves characters and spoilers from previous segments) “Scarazial” ends with Zim finally snapping and going insane, and it is really a fun/terrifying thing to watch!

“Zaygam” takes place immediately after “Scarazial”, and is the last of this six part saga. I can’t say much without spoilers other than it wraps up every loose end perfectly and the epilogue got me all chocked up! I actually had to pause reading for a few hours and I still ended up losing a few tears when I picked it back up mid-chapter! One thing I can say, there is an odd introduction of a new character, it seems a bit out of left field, and doesn’t make any sense at first (especially since it comes immediately after an April fools chapter lol), but trust me, if you keep reading to the end you will quickly fall in love with this idea that is presented, and everything else that this 6 part saga has to offer! 

Please give it a read!

13/10 Very long, but so so good! The writing, plot, and characters are so well done and the depiction of emotional trauma and ptsd is handled well. And the Character redemptions are amazing, plus the ships!!! This also has my hands down absolute favorite depiction of Red!

Between The Stars by andystarr aka @andyyoureastarr

This fic is 2,111 words. Originally posted on 01-04-2020 and so far only has one chapter.

I’ve reviewed this Author’s fics before, but this is a brand new one! And although there probably isn’t enough of it for me to truly review it, based off what is out so far and the Author’s other works I am 100% confident that I can recommend it! The Author introduces a new alien species that appears to be blood thirsty similar to the Irekns, they discover Dib post alien abduction via “the really dumb aliens who think he’s [Zim] a human and try to fuse him with stuff” from the show. Dib ends up killing his captures before his supposed “rescue” and the chapter ends on a pretty ominous note. 

?/10 Since there’s only one chapter so far I don’t want to give it a rating, but knowing the Author’s other work I’m sure it’ll have a perfect score.

Breaking Routine by GalaxyCuup aka @galaxycuup

This fic is 6,188 words. Originally posted on 12-02-2019 and last updated on 12-13-2019. It has two chapters so far.

This is another one that’s a little harder to review since it’s still so new, but the two chapters that are out so far, are so well written, and hold so much promise for the future! This is a species swap AU where Zim is human and in Hi-skool and Dib is the Irken Scientist who has come to Earth to study and research it. The Author also posts pictures IN THE CHAPTERS!! They are so good!! The characters are very well written and their interactions are fun to watch. Plus with this being a species swap, it means their personalities are still sorta there, but their cultures and up bringing are very different so they react to things differently than their canon selves would, which make it a very fascinating read and a fresh take from all the other versions of these two that I’ve seen so far. Zim is his usually hot headed self, but being a teenager it seems to get him into more trouble than he deserves, while Dib has that air of infatuation and child-like wonderment with the planet Earth and everything new around him. I’m very curious to see where the story goes from here and what these two will do if Dib’s Irken self is ever revealed.

?/10 It’s still new so I can’t quiet give it a full score, but I see a lot of potential and the unique take combined with the artwork is so good that I definitely recommend it, and look forward to reading more.

Chomp by VelociraptorAddict aka unashamed self promotion

This fic is 12,280 words. Originally posted 12-31-2019 and last updated 01-18-20. It is updated weekly and so far has 4 chapters posted.

We start off with an introduction of a new Alien species, not much is revealed about them at first besides the fact that they require to “Bond” with others in order to survive off their own planet. More is revealed little by little as the story goes unfolds. This alien is sent to Earth/Urth to gather information for an upcoming invasion, and ends up forming a Bond with a young girl to do so. This girl later moves across the country and starts going to skool with Dib. One day she makes the mistake of admitting she doesn’t believe in Bigfoot, which leads to Dib confronting her to try and convince her otherwise. However, during the conversation it is revealed that she does believe in ghosts, and Dib’s need to be validated for his belief in the paranormal, means that he quickly sees this girl as someone who will actually listen to him. So he attaches himself to her and assumes they’re friends. Unfortunately for the girl, she has a pretty big secret that she doesn’t want this potential paranormal investigator to find out, the Loughran. 

Unfortunately, it is not a secret she’s able to keep for long. Dib quickly becomes suspicious that she must be hiding something, when another new student (Zim), comes to their skool and Dib accuses him of being an Alien. The girl seems to flip between agreeing with him and denying the existences of aliens all together and Dib finds it very suspicious. When a fight breaks out at recess between Zim, the girl, and something invisible, Dib quickly and adamantly demands answers!

This part of the plot moves pretty quickly, but it is simply the set up for what’s to come.

?/10 It doesn’t feel right scoring my own fic, but I will admit the writing style itself could use a bit of improvement and it could definitely use a lot more descriptive text. However, the character interactions and dialogue portions are done well enough. And I’ve been doing enough of these fic reviews that it’s about time I put my money where my mouth is and started writing my own, right?

Best of DC: Week of February 19th, 2020

Best of this Week: DCeased: Unkillables #1 - Tom Taylor, Karl Mostert, Trevor Scott, Neil Edwards, John Livesay, Rex Lokus and Saida Temofonte

Ahhh shit, here we go again. DCeased was awesome.

In much the same way that the original Marvel Zombies filled my heart with dread, DCeased absolutely blew my mind with the short six issues that it took place in. It was equal parts violent and heartbreaking as the heroes of Earth had to figure out a way to either stop the Anti-Life virus or die trying. We had a good spin off with the single issue, A Good Day to Die and now we have Unkillables, another spin off focusing on some of the more violent heroes and villains while the events of the main series unfold elsewhere.

The book begins on the first day of the Anti-Life virus being released as Deathstroke finds himself on a job in Kentucky. Throughout the original story, I did kinda wonder what people like him or the other assassins were up to, given that we saw a select number of other dead supervillains throughout like Giganta and Clayface. As Tom Taylor and Karl Mostert unfold the story we see that Slade Wilson was killing some infected Neo-Nazis before an attempt to renegotiate his price ends with him infected too.

Mostert and Taylor set this opening up in a very comedic way with the white supremacits running from something in the local church as Deathstroke looks on, puzzled as to why they’re running before taking a few out before heading inside. Mostert, Rex Lokus and I think Trevor Scott then give us an awesome single page of Slade facing down a horde of zombies with only his gun and a bloody sword. He looks like a badass and, in the following panels, proves it by killing them with ease.

Mostert doesn’t shy away from Slade’s brutal violence and shows how fluidly he can kill with dynamic poses as he shoots and slices multiple enemies at once. This accentuated by the excellently colored spurts of blood from the zombies and the gory detail of blood on the walls. There’s even a really good panel of one of the zombies being cut in half with Scott inking the silhouette as their blood and insides drip down. Even better is when Slade gets infected and violently rips his mask off before coming back to his senses while choking a guy.

Tom Taylor introduces a unique aspect here as Deathstroke returns to normal on the second day of the virus being introduced. As we learn later, it’s due to Slade’s unique super soldier DNA that allows him to fight off the infection, effectively being immune to a point. I can definitely see this being a double edged sword for him as the infection seems to last for a day before being purged from his system. This makes him unique amongst both the heroes and villains of Earth as maybe a potential savior.

I’d also like to praise Saida Temofonte for her amazing lettering as well. She does an amazing job, not only with word balloons, but with captions that have a bloody background and the typefaces she uses for sound effects. For the most part, they fit the gruesomeness of the story with intense and bloody BANGs to eerie RRRRRRs, signaling the incoming zombies. Deathstroke’s scream as he claws his own face is intense, scratchy and blood curling until we get an AMAZING title page with names filling the empty space.

As things progress, we cut to Jason Todd in the Batcave. The silence is eerie as we get one small “spsh” sound as Jason steps through the blood trail of Bruce, Tim and Dick. Unfortunately, this seems to take place shortly after the events of DCeased #2 when an infected Dick and Tim attack and infect Batman, leaving Alfred to kill them all. Jason, like most readers, is shocked because he thought Bruce would have found a way to survive and then he’s met by Ace the Bathound. After letting Ace see that he’s not infected, Jason proceeds to make graves for his brothers and father before speeding off in the Batmobile to find the rest of his family with Ace.

These scenes are powerful as Jason, normally the black sheep of the family, has to deal with the fact that he’s one of few left. Why wasn’t Bruce prepared? Why was he the one left and not Dick or Tim? Damian’s still alive in Metropolis, but effectively, Jason is all alone. Mostert and I believe Neil Edwards show Jason’s love for his family as he carves out wooden headstones and buries them in the cave. Without a word of dialogue, this speaks volumes about Jason’s love for his family.

Elsewhere in Gotham, Ravager, Rose Wilson with a missing eye, unlike her main continuity counterpart, is curled up in her apartment in fear. The zombies are pounding on her door when Slade radios in and tells her it’s time to escape. Rose has the ability to see into the future in short bursts and sees that everytime she goes for the door, Zombies come through and kill her. Deathstroke, however, has a plan. As a side note, it’s great to see Rose in gear similar to what she wore in Geoff Johns’ “Teen Titans” while also complementing Deathstroke’s current armor.

Unfortunately for Deathstroke, as he keeps his eyes to the sky, he sees the terror that is an infected Man-Bat flying at him with a terrifying SCReeeee as he crashes through the window and smashes the plane on the roof Rose runs to her dad and, believing him to be infected, plunges her sword through his chest and he screams “Ow.” This scene is pure comedy made even better by the dramatic rain and fire in the background. Soon after, Mirror Master, Evan McCulloch, shows up offering them help.

I don’t know what the reason is for using the Scottish version of the character, but it doesn’t really matter as the representation of the Mirror Dimension is still cool as hell. While wearing special glasses that block signals, they walk through the dimension and Mostert draws an epic depiction of it with all of the violence, gore and death through the many mirrors while the characters look miniscule compared to the vastness of it all. The Mirror Dimension has always been terrifying and McCulloch could do a lot to solve the problem, but it makes sense that he doesn’t. Cause it’s terrifying.

After many pages, we arrive at the rest of the stars (fodder) of the series in Vandal Savage, Solomon Grundy, The Creeper, Cheetah, Lady Shiva, Bane, Deadshot and Captain Cold. I do have a bit of a continuity issue as Cold was shown to have been one of the Infected during the events of “A Good Place to Die,” but alternatively this series could explain how he got there or, much like that story, it’s off base with what’s happening in the main pages. But some of these additions are pretty interesting to say the very least.

Savage is near immortal, but has been shown to have been killed before. There’s a high chance that using Deathstroke, he’ll find a way to cure and rule over the people of the Earth after the heroes leave. Grundy is already dead, so can he get infected? The Creeper is much like Deathstroke in that he can heal from anything, so it makes sense that he’s managed to survive. Cheetah is strong and fast, but I don’t rate her chances high and the rest, while immensely skilled, are still just human. This is a ragtag group, but they’re not averse to getting the job done by any means.

The rest of the issue focuses on Jason Todd and his fight to rescue the remaining members of the Batfamily. Mostert, Lokus and John Livesay give readers an awesome assault on the Gotham PD with Cassandra Cain as Black Bat, James Gordon and Harvey Bullock fighting back against the zombies. Cass awesomely kicks and knees zombies in the background while Harvey and Jim shoot them. I LOVED Cass as Batgirl/Black Bat and it was awesome to see the return of the iconic costume and a character that I like so much.

Of course, Temofonte thrills with the lettering here again. She sells the panic in both Jim and Bullock as they fight off the horde as well as the frankness of Bullock as he has to break it to Jim that Blck Bat is the only one coming. The static-y bubbles that she uses on Bullock when he gets infected is also amazing and saddening, but gets even worse when Cass has to “CRCK” his neck to kill him. Soon after, Jason plows through the GCPD in the Batmobile with a “CRNNNCH” that shrinks around the vehicle.

Jason rescues Cass and Jim after shooting the remaining zombies in the head and plans to get the hell out of dodge. Jim, still holding out on the idea of hope, tells Jason that Barbara is still out there somewhere, but Jason, knowing that it’s no longer the time to keep secrets, reveals his and Cass’ identities and shows Jim that Barb is dead. He then takes the haggard detective to her last known location and Mostert and Lokus sell the utter despair of the scene.

Infected versions of Barb, Stephanie Brown, Batwoman and Catwoman were killed by Poison Ivy and Harley Quinn in Issue #3 of DCeased (if I remember right). This scene of James finding his daughter is depressingly grey and his facial expressions show us just how painful this is for him. He’s lost just about everything and cries in his grief. Jason, however, finds the dead body of the Joker and ties him to the front of the Batmobile before they all make their escape to Bludhaven.

This first issue of a three part miniseries already has me as excited as the original story did. I love each of the characters being used, the callbacks to past history and the way that everyone is being written. Each of these violent characters sees that there’s no need to hold back anymore as the regular rules are tossed out of the window. Everyone now has different amounts of pain and grief to deal with while others have different hopes of power or a cure. Ultimately, I don’t think things will end ultra well given the events of the main series, but I have no doubts that this will stand on its own.

Tom Taylor continues to be excellent when writing the despair and tragedies of DCeased and lifting up lesser characters, like The Creeper. His scripting and dialogue are a joy to read and I really feel like he’s got a grasp on everyone. Karl Mostert brings their all to this book with awesome panels and scenes that make readers want to wince, but look again to see the utter brutality of what they’re witnessing. His art is stellar. The various inkers definitely bring it to life alongside Lokus’ vibrant colors and Temofonte’s amazing letters.

I’m already gleefully anticipating the next issue and it more than justifies the $5.99 price, high recommend!

Also, y'know, support me on Patreon: patreon.com/TyTalksComics

Impressed? - Jake Peralta x Reader

I wrote this one a while back on a sudden spirt of inspiration (which has now disappeared 😞). Takes place in the episode “The Party” Also on AO3. Read my other Jake x reader fics here and here.

You had sequestered yourself in a corner of the library, checking your phone periodically for anything to save you from your boredom. You hated parties, especially those where most of the attendees were boring academics. But it was your uncle's birthday party so you were going to have to grin and bear it. Although, you were quite excited to meet some of the detectives that your Uncle Ray worked with. Despite the house having a "no cop talk" policy, you were really excited to hear all the amazing cases they'd worked. Anything to save you from the slow, painful death of a dinner party.

Everyone had been avoiding the library (or, more likely, you) since you arrived so you were surprised when someone entered the room. It was the only thing that had made you look up from you phone since you'd arrived.  He strode in with the utmost determination on his face; you'd never seen anyone walk into a library with such purpose. He looked around a little and you were confused as to how he hadn't noticed you yet. His gaze landed on a photo of your uncles on one of the side tables. "Oh, man, it's black Tom Selleck and white Sidney Poitier." he quipped. You had to stop yourself from snorting at this fairly accurate comparison. His eyes moved back to the bookshelves, narrowing as he scanned the books closely. He sighed, muttering to himself, "Come on. All books and no magazines? What kind of crappy library's full of books?" "You know, libraries tend to be filled with books." you spoke up, startling the intruder. He turned to you sharply, looking slightly sheepish. "I…um…didn't see you there. Sorry to disturb you." he apologised. You shook your head. "It's alright. You weren't supposed to see me; I'm hiding." You supposed you sounded rather childlike - hiding yourself away from all the adults at a party. His shoulders relaxed and his shocked expression faded. "Well, that's pretty bad on my part. I'm a detective." he told you braggingly. You raised an eyebrow. "Is that supposed to impress me?" you asked, not giving away the fact that you were fairly impressed. "Yes." he replied honestly. You scoffed. "Then you're gonna have to up your game." A smirk grew on his face, which, upon thorough inspection, you had decided was rather attractive. And you'd much rather have a detective flirt with you than listen to some professor drone on about the Civil War. "Challenge accepted." he said confidently. He then churned out the cheesiest line possible. "What's a girl like you doing in a place like this?" You sighed at the phrase, wondering how many men had attempted to woo women with that line. "I was invited. Like everyone else here. Besides, it would be rude to miss my uncle's birthday." you answered. The shock returned to the detective's face. "Holt is your uncle?" You nodded. "Whaaaaaaaaat?" he exclaimed. You hadn't expected him to be completely comfortable flirting with his boss' niece but you hoped you hadn’t put him off completely. "My mom is Kevin's sister-in-law." you explained, wanting to ease him a little. "Oh. Cool cool cool cool cool." he rattled off. "What did you come to the 'crap' library for anyway?" you queried, changing back to the original subject. He opened his mouth to reply before his eyes went wide. "The crap library," he gasped with gusto, "All the magazines are in the bathroom." Your brow furrowed. "Great solve, detective." you congratulated puzzled. He didn't catch the confusion in your voice and just took a bow, accepting your praise. He turned to leave but stopped in his tracks, the both of you being shocked by your uncle's sudden appearance. Ray looked between the two of you suspiciously. "Can I help you, Peralta?" he asked, his gaze landing on the detective. So this was Detective Peralta; you'd heard your uncle drop his name, mostly in complaint, quite a few times in your weekly phone calls. Peralta cleared his throat to compose himself. "Captain. I didn't hear you silently sneak up on me. Lurking must run in the family." he complained, half in jest towards your encounter. "(Y/n) is from Kevin's side of the family. Her mother is--" your uncle began to explain. "His sister-in-law. I'm all caught up on your family tree." Peralta finished. He pointed a finger in the air and continued, "Oh, that reminds me, tell Kevin I am available for brunch on Sunday the 17th." "The 17th is a Tuesday." you corrected, causing the detective to look at you dumbstruck. He clearly had a worse sense of time than you did. "Why are you talking about the New Yorker all of a sudden?" your uncle probed, taking a sip of his port. "I always talk about smart stuff," Peralta bragged, clearly trying to impress you again, "You know, the Jazz Age, what's in a name, the 1950s movies that are from the 50s." He was still going to have to try harder, especially as Ray shot him down. "Those were the categories on Jeopardy last night." he observed. Peralta made an kind of cute embarrassed face. "Don't try so hard to impress my husband. Or my niece, for that matter." His eyes flickered over to you for a brief moment. Trust your Uncle Ray to stop a guy from making a move on you. "Yes, sir." Peralta replied but something told you he wasn’t going to be that easily swayed. He waited until your uncle left the room before whispering, "To the crap library." He strode out of the room with the same determination as he had when he entered - he was clearly hell-bent on making a good impression on Kevin. This time, however, he stopped in the doorway and turned to you. "Catch you later." he said with such a suave smoothness that you couldn’t help but blush. You couldn’t believe he was the same guy who'd been looking for magazines in a library mere seconds ago. You wished that your uncle would consider inviting the detectives round more often. Anything that would allow you to see more of Peralta.

Unfortunately, you didn’t bump into the detective again at the party. You suspected your Uncle Ray had something to do with that, probably shepherding Peralta away from both you and your Uncle Kevin. You wouldn’t have been surprised if that was true; your uncle had always been very cautious whenever you mentioned an interest in someone. You wished he’d let you use your own judgement for once. Peralta seemed nice enough and sort of a dork (your one weakness in men). But perhaps the merging of professional and personal life was too much for Ray, as it always had been. Maybe that was why there had been no sign of Peralta, or any of his colleagues, about an hour after you had met. This detective had gone and you knew nothing about him; not his first name and certainly not his number. So, you decided to take matters into your own hands. Screw what your uncle thought, or what anyone thought for that matter. You liked this guy and you were going to make the first move (something you hadn’t done in a while). As the elevator dinged and the doors opened, you took a deep breath. You really hoped your uncle wouldn’t disrupt things. You gingerly stepped out into the bullpen. This was it. A detective with her hair pulled back, a sharp pantsuit and a pretty face approached you immediately. You still had ample time, however, to feel the buzz of the whole precinct. It was wonderful. The energy and passion of every member of the squad practically seeped out of the walls. You could see why your uncle loved being a cop so much. “How can I help you, ma’am?” the detective asked, her voice polite and articulate. It felt odd that she had addressed you so formally as you were pretty sure you were a similar age. “I…uh…” you stammered, suddenly feeling awkward for barging into the precinct. “Ah. (Y/n). What a pleasant surprise.” Your head shot up to see your Uncle Ray walking towards you from his office; his face showing no indicators of pleasantness or surprise (something you were used to). “Uncle Ray.” you greeted with a smile. He turned to the detective, whose eyes had gone wide. “Santiago, this is my niece, (y/n). (Y/n), this is one of my finest detectives, Amy Santiago.” he introduced. Amy puffed out her chest in pride. “Nice to meet you.” you said. “It’s an honour to meet you.” she replied. You watched her body twitch awkwardly as if she was going to bow to you. “I have…a thing.” she muttered vaguely before shuffling away to her desk. Ray turned back to you. “How can I help? I’m afraid I’m quite busy this morning so--” “I’m here to see Detective Peralta.” you told him bluntly. “Oh.” There was a pause while he processed what you told him. “Peralta. Detective Peralta. You’re here to see…Detective Peralta.” You nodded. Having said his name three times, the detective appeared as if he was Bloody Mary or Beetlejuice. “Hey, Santiago, can you help me wrap up this massive homicide case in a sec?” he asked his colleague. He was still bragging to impress you and hadn’t cottoned on that you already were. “Oh, (y/n), didn’t see you there.” he lied. You shook you head. You both looked to your uncle, expecting him to weigh in somehow, but he was just looking right back slightly bewildered. “(Y/n) and Peralta. My niece and Detective Peralta.” he mumbled. You had to bite your lip to hold back your laughter. You couldn’t believe how much you’d shocked him. “Shall we go to the break room? I can get you a coffee.” Peralta suggested. You took one last glance at your thoroughly confused uncle before nodding. “Sure.”

After chasing away two detectives, who had been using the pool table as some sort of weird pedicure station, the two of you were finally alone like you had been last night. Except this time you were super nervous. Was it bad that you really wanted a drink to take the edge off? Jake handed you a cup of coffee with a “Sup, girl”. You chuckled and observed, “I see your flirting hasn’t improved overnight.” “First off, my flirting was amazing last night. I’m irresistible. Secondly, you’d be surprised how many girls I’ve charmed with a simple sup.” “None?” you guessed teasingly, taking a sip of coffee. He pulled a face. “Anyway, you left early last night. Before I could get your number. So…” You held out your phone to him. “Forward. I like it.” he complimented, taking your phone. The blush that appeared on your cheeks was inevitable. “Did you find the magazine you were looking for?” you asked as he typed his number. “I did not. I actually ended up in Holt and Kevin’s bathroom with Amy and the Sarge, which was super awkward.” “I can imagine.” You took another sip of coffee. It was then you noticed he had finished typing and was just pressing one button constantly. “You’re taking under the chin selfies, aren’t you?” you asked. “No.” he replied quickly, biting his lip innocently. He began to pull more obvious stupid faces so you knew he was lying. You snatched the phone from him and swiped to the newly added contact. “Jake,” you read with a smile, “I like it.” He smiled too though his seemed more blissful. “When do you get off?” you enquired, putting your phone back in your pocket. Jake raised an eyebrow with a sly smirk. You gasped. “Work. You know I meant work.” “About 8.” he replied. “Do you…wanna meet up after work and…get a…drink?” you posed. It was so obvious you hadn’t done this in a while and you felt so awkward. “That sounds good.” Your face lit up. “Really? Okay. Great. I’ll see you at 8.” Jake opened the door for you. It swung open to reveal most of the detectives trying to listen in to your conversation. And at the back of the group, trying to look innocent, was your uncle. Your face went bright red. Jake put his hand on your shoulder. “(Y/n), welcome to the 99.”

The DC Challenge: Did You Solve It Before DC Comics’ Creators?

This week marks the debut of the “Kamandi Challenge,” which is both the first new series starring the original Kamandi since his first series ended nearly forty years ago and the first new “Challenge” comic book DC Comics has put out since the original “DC Challenge” in 1985-86. But what, exactly, is a “Challenge” comic book and what was “DC Challenge” about?

RELATED: “Kamandi Challenge” 24 Creators At Random for “Last Boy On Earth” Stories

“DC Challenge” was an idea that a few comic book writers came up with at the 1983 San Diego Comic Con. The concept of the book was that each issue would be written and drawn by a different writer and artist. They could do anything they wanted and use any character they felt like (outside of characters whose title they were currently writing) but they had to end their issue on a cliffhanger, along with a title for the next issue. The next creative team had to pick up from that cliffhanger and continue the story (using the issue title somehow), ending their issue on a cliffhanger and so on and so forth until the whole thing was wrapped up in the final issue.

The very first issue was by Mark Evanier, Gene Colan and Bob Smith (Evanier was the guy who first came up with the project, so it made sense that he would kick things off). It starred Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman and Adam Strange. It introduced the idea of some sort of alien invasion of Earth, along with strange beings who looked like famous dead celebrities like Humphrey Bogart and Groucho Marx. Also, seemingly dead people were getting possessed by what appeared to be demons somehow tied in to the phases of the moon. Wonder Woman got involved with some scientists.

Aquaman has also gone missing. Towards the end of the issue, Superman was knocked out by someone mysterious while on the moon. Batman was alerted to some mystery that took him to the Gotham City power plant, where he met a turban-wearing alien.

The most difficult mystery later writers had solving involved the following numbers, written on a wall and discovered by Batman…

See if you can even guess as to what that one is about. The first cliffhanger saw Gotham City about to blow up…

Len Wein, Chuck Patton and Mike DeCarlo solved the cliffhanger by having Batman quickly cut the power lines to that area of Gotham City so that Bruce Wayne’s VCR (which was a Betamax, by the way) lost power, so the nuclear device was never triggered.

As you might expect, plots were pretty willy nilly brought up and resolved. One of the major things each writer did was to use the ability they had to use any DC character (that they were not already writing) to pull out some really obscure characters from the DC Comics archives. In #2, Wein and Patton had B’wana Beast and Congorilla join in on the fun!

This was more or less B’wana Beast’s first appearance since was first featured in a couple of issues of “Showcase” (unlike other heroes introduced in “Showcase” like Flash and Green Lantern, the B’wana Beast did not have much luck as a hero).

Things really weren’t being followed particularly well, but we have to spotlight how Doug Moench resolved a mini-cliffhanger from the second issue. In #2, Aquaman was found but he was in the Sahara desert without any water! So in #3, Moench and artists Carmine Infantino and Bob Smith had Aquaman avoid dying of thirst by grabbing a buzzard and literally drinking its blood!!

Paul Levitz escalated things in the fourth issue (by Gil Kane and Klaus Janson), by having the aliens actively invade the Earth. Levitz also doubled down on obscure characters by having Deadman possess Detective Chimp as part of the story!!

You could tell that they were having a blast with the story when they could really just do whatever they want, including the aforementioned Deadman/Detective Chimp interaction. Levitz also introduced a plot where Superman’s identity was about to be revealed in a Daily Planet headline, but no one seemed to be interested in following up on that idea.

RELATED: The Kamandi Challenge #1 (PREVIEW)

The problem with each writer just having a fun time on their own was that not a whole lot of time was spent trying to make the whole thing read as if it were an actual continuing narrative. Plots were introduced, plots were dropped. Joker was in outer space and playing a seemingly important role. Jimmy Olsen and Adam Strange went to a world conquered by Nazis. People kept doing their own thing and not really following up on the main plot. It was not until #8 that any writer even gave Evanier’s number puzzle a chance, with Gerry Conway having Batman figure out that those numbers were part of a formula to blow up the Earth (with each number being in megahertz to denote “Vibrational frequences” – hey, he was trying, at least! The other writers didn’t even give it a try!).

However, it was not until Roy Thomas took a turn in #9 that things finally got back on track a bit, as Thomas did a wonderful job in #9 (art by Don Heck) of having the Guardians and Metron discuss things, which served as exposition to sort of tie the various plots of the previous 8 issues together…

Issue #11, though, co-written by Marv Wolfman and Cary Bates, though, was a game-changer, as they finally cracked Evanier’s code! Check it out (art by Keith Giffen and Dave Hunt)…

Can you figure it out yet? If not, don’t worry, it’s super duper obscure. We made sure to include one specific page from issue #1, a page that clearly every other writer skipped over in their story, because the total Batman came up with? If you flip it over…

Yes, Dr. Eli Ellis, the guy who had only made a single brief appearance all the way back in #1, was a key part of the whole puzzle! How hilarious is that? Everyone skipped over this guy until the very end of the series. By the way, Wolfman and Bates also brought in a big bad guy behind everything, someone Giffen loved to draw…

(Isn’t it a shame that Jack Kirby wasn’t involved in this project at all? He was working for DC a bit at the time).

Issue #12 quickly resolved the Superman identity plot by Superman printing up a bunch of newspapers with other people revealed as Superman…

(Luckily, due to his brilliant glasses disguise, Clark Kent looked as different from Superman as Sally Field).

Ellis, as it turned out, was possessed by a demon follower of Darkseid and Ellis was in charge of a nuclear device so large that it would destroy the whole world. Luckily, with the heroes tipped off to Ellis’ role in all of this, they went to his lab and found the bomb and saved the world.

Oh, and the celebrity lookalikes? They were, well, simply that – people who looked like celebrities. Like you see hired for parties and events.

The whole thing ended up as a bit of a crazy mess (especially amusing was that this was all while DC was changing its continuity with “Crisis on Infinite Earths”), but it was also one hell of a fun ride while it lasted. If the “Kamandi Challenge” is half as fun as the original “DC Challenge,” we will have a very fun year of comics ahead of us!

NOTE: The full creative teams for the original “DC Challenge” were as follows:

#1 – Mark Evanier, Gene Colan and Bob Smith

#2 – Len Wein, Chuck Patton and Mike DeCarlo

#3 – >Doug Moench, Carmine Infantino and Bob Smith

#4 – Paul Levitz, Gil Kane and Klaus Janson

#5 – Mike W. Barr, Dave Gibbons and Mark Farmer

#6 – Elliot S! Maggin, Dan Jurgens and Larry Mahlstedt

#7 – Paul Kupperberg, Joe Staton and Steve Mitchell

#8 – Rick Hoberg, Dick Giordano, and Arne Starr

#9 – Roy Thomas and Don Heck

#10 – Dan Mishkin, Curt Swan and Terry Austin

#11 – Cary Bates, Marv Wolfman, Keith Giffen and Dave Hunt

#12 – Mark Evanier, Dan Mishkin, Roy Thomas, Gerry Conway, Len Wein, Marv Wolfman, Dan Spiegle, Denys Cowan, Luke McDonnell, Stan Woch, Steve Lightle, Ross Andru, Tom Mandrake, Rodin Rodriguez, Rick Magyar, Jan Duuresama, Gary Martin and Frank McLaughlin

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