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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 10 months

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If we're gonna do this we gonna do it right!.... Song fic (or headcanon; whatever fits your mood) of Silver & Deuce trying to set Lilia & Mama Spade up for a date; cameo of "Kiss the Girl" moment from the OG Little Mermaid >:3c

[Referencing this unofficial blog event!]

*makes a banner that looks like a little kid bashing two of their dolls’ heads together* I decided to use Lilia’s Clubwear look for the banner since that’s the closest thing to “casual clothes” he has. I also threw in some… guest stars, shall we say, to spice up the situation! Kronk voice) Oh yeah, it’s all coming together 😎

I wrote headcanons again since I'm already working on quite a few longer pieces in the background. I went wild with this one, so I hope you enjoy!

Curiouser and Curiouser...

Deuce regularly spoke with his mom over the phone about the recent happenings in their lives. What he didn't expect was for her to announce that she was visiting the town on Sage's Island tomorrow. "I've been improving my computer skills, Deuce!" Dylla told him proudly. "I've been doing that instant messaging thing that's all the rage with you kiddos. I even made myself an online friend! I'm going to meet him in town. I'll come see you afterwards, okay?"

Well, that just sent Deuce into an existential crisis. Sure, his mom was a tough, independent woman that could fend for herself, but he had a tendency to fret for her wellbeing, especially knowing what he put her through in his delinquent phase. What if the "online friend" was a total creep or even someone dangerous? She deserved nothing less than the best company (and anyone that so much as looked at her the wrong way would soon find Deuce coming at them full throttle to slug them in the face).

He can't focus during lectures or on his homework at all. Deuce just keeps fidgeting and pacing back and forth, his thoughts wracked with worry. At some point, he can't contain himself and blurts everything out to Ace (first mistake).

Ace decides to pounce on this opportunity to tease his roomie. "Dude, she's definitely meeting a secret boyfriend for a date. You'd better start preparing lines to kiss ass to your soon-to-be-stepdad."

"MY MOM WOULDN'T DO THAT!! N-Not without telling me about it at least..." Deuce insists--but as irritating as Ace is, his immature jokes only feed the paranoia. Was it possibly true? Was his mom seeing an unknown man, considering bringing him into their family?! Those thoughts swirl in his head and cloud his better judgment when he turns in for the night.

The very next day, Deuce makes a beeline to the town to put his nerves to rest. I'm just going to watch them to make sure nothing weird's going on and that mom stays safe!! He's in such a hurry that he barely registers Ace shouting after him, "It was just a prank, bro! I didn't think you'd actually take it this seriously!", nor the startled Silver (+ a bird friend resting on his shoulder) and angry Sebek that he crashes into.

Right as Sebek starts on a fresh tirade (“Watch where you��re going, human!! Have you no regards for your seniors?!”), Deuce shoves right by him with an, “Aaah, I don’t have time for this! Mom’s in a pinch!!”

"What NERVE, running off while you're being berated for your negligence?! GET BACK HERE, I'M NOT DONE WITH YOU YET!!" (And so Sebek gives chase after him)

"Sebek, wait..." (But he's already long gone, and too frenzied in his pursuit, that he doesn't pay his fellow knight any mind.) "... I wonder what all that was about," Silver sighs. I should follow them to make sure things don't get out of hand.

He's a few steps down the road when he hears someone fast approaching from behind. Who should appear but an out-of-breath Ace. "Hey, Silver-senpai! Did you see Deuce going this way?! Sheesh, can that guy run! Took off so fast, I couldn't keep up..."

"I did. He ran into town, and Sebek after him."

"Great! That's all I needed to know, thanks!" And then Ace, too, is gone. (Silver, pure soul that he is, incorrectly assumes the best of him. If Deuce and Sebek both leave campus without getting the right permissions for it, they could both get in trouble. Ace is so considerate to go and help his friend. He's really living up to the Heartslabyul spirit and creed.)

The four boys eventually find each other again in town (Silver trailing after Ace, Ace tracking down Sebek by his loud voice, and Sebek locating Deuce, who is shadily staring daggers at a pair window shopping).

Sebek’s back to shouting at Deuce, Ace is telling Sebek to can it, and Deuce is ignoring them both. "Who's that guy mom's with?! I can't see too well from this far away, but I can't get any closer in case I'm spotted..." Deuce grumbles to himself.

“Hold up, lemme see!!” Ace nosily butts in, squinting at the duo in the distance. “Huh, it kinda looks like Lilia-senpai from this angle, but I must be wrong... right?”

Silver looks where Deuce and Ace are, and his heart nearly stops. "F-Father?!" The word is out of his mouth before he can reel it back in—Sebek’s face is affixed in horror at the slip, and the Heartslabyul boys absolutely lose it.

“Whaaaat?! I-If your dad is my mom’s date… then… th-then… Silver-senpai and I will become stepbrothers?!”

“Forget that!! What I wanna know is, why does Silver-senpai’s dad look like a carbon copy of Lilia-senpai in a different hairstyle and punkier clothes?!”

“WHAT NONSENSE ARE YOU BLATHERING ON ABOUT NOW?! Hold your tongue, cur! You know not of what you speak!! C-Clearly Silver’s father does NOT resemble our esteemed Lilia-sama in any way, shape, or form!!” Sebek bellowed angrily. “TELL THEM, SILVER!!”

“Er… yes, that’s right. I’m afraid I don’t see the resemblance at all. They are nothing alike."

(The Diasomnia duo had been totally blindsided by this turn of events; when Lilia had told them earlier that he was going to meet up with an online friend, they hadn't expected it, in actuality, to have been a date. Silver had thought Lilia was going to meet his long-time gaming buddy, Gloomy Samurai, in person, not a classmate's MOTHER.)

“Are you both sleeping with your eyes open or something?! That SO totally looks like Lilia-senpai,” Ace protests—but Deuce (bless him) is somehow 100% convinced. In fact, this realization just fuels him even more!!

"We should leave. It would be rude of us to intrude on their private time together," Silver tries to suggest--but no, Deuce won't back down at this point.

"Silver-senpai! ... No, future stepbrother Silver-senpai!!" Deuce says very, VERY seriously, "Don't stop me now! I have to do this....!! I have to make sure your dad's the right man for my mom."

Sebek begins to raise his voice again, but (shockingly) Silver puts an arm in front of him, silencing the first year. Silver's expression turns very fierce, matching the hardness in Deuce's eyes. "I can assure you, my father is a good man. He would never bring harm to, nor disrespect, anyone. I apologize, but I won't allow you to remain suspicious of my father. If he wishes to court another, then that should be his prerogative, and I fully support him."

But like a boulder, Deuce's determination is difficult to shift. "Even if it's you asking me to step down, I won't!! This is important to me. My mom is important to me!!"

Those words seem to strike a chord with Silver, whose features soften. "... I understand. If that's the case, then prove your resolve to me, man to man--and I will demonstrate mine." ("Ohoh!! Silver has thrown down the gauntlet!! What do you say, human?! Do you accept his challenge?!" Sebek cries in the background. Ace eyes the situation warily--how quickly his teasing had spiraled into something serious.)

"I gotchu." Deuce slams a fist into an open palm, grin wicked--his delinquent side coming out. "We'll throw down, get our parents to show off their best attributes to each other."

"It's settled then."

"We'll make their date go smoothly!! That way, we'll see just how much of their good points' come out and if they're suited for each other or not."

"Agreed. It is simple."

"It's so obvious!"

"How did you guys even come to THAT conclusion?! You totally skipped some steps there,” Ace groaned (amidst Sebek's way-too-interested chanting). "You guys rubbed your collective two brain cells and that's the best thing you could come up with?!"

The boys shadow Lilia and Dylla for a few hours, but nothing that interesting happens. It’s mostly them talking and sightseeing (plus the occasional bad pun, which sets Deuce's mom into hysterics), not really doing anything inherently romantic. Ace starts to sweat, realizing the hole he’s dug himself into. If they figure out this was all based on a bad joke, then he’d have an upset Deuce and maybe even Silver and Sebek wailing on him. If he doesn’t turn the tables soon, he might be in a world of hurt.

“Wow, would you look at that! They must be really shy!” Ace hurriedly comments.

“That’s strange. Father isn’t normally like this. He’s very free-spirited. I wonder if something is wrong…”

“Maybe Deuce’s mom is such a bombshell that he’s all tongue-tied!!” Ace elbows Deuce in the ribs, only to earn a slight glare back. “We should try to do something to move things along.”

“… I got nothin’,” Deuce confessed.

“Seriously? Alright, I guess it’s up to me then.”

“JUST A MINUTE,” Sebek thunders. “Who died and made YOU the love expert?! How do we even know we can trust your advice?!”

“Uh, news flash numbskull: I’ve actually had a girlfriend before so I’d know the kind of junk chicks are into! Besides, what would you know? All you ever kiss is Malleus-senpai’s—”

“Do NOT use the Young Master’s name in vain!! It is this exact kind of brash behavior that explains why you’re without a partner now!!” Sebek smirked as he folded his arms. “I, on the other hand, am well-versed in matters of love thanks to Lilia-sama’s mentoring and the romance materials I’ve absorbed in my spare time.”

“Like hell you are! Hearing about it and reading it is totally different from experiencing it in real life!!”

While Ace an Sebek squabble, poor Deuce is trying so hard to brainstorm and Silver’s starting to doze of again. That’s when his head bolts upright from a peck on the cheek. His bird friend peers right into Silver’s eyes as if to say, “Watch this!”

The bird flies off and snatches the cap from Dylla's head. There’s a big commotion as both she and Lilia try to retrieve the hat, but the bird easily avoids them and retreats with them closely following. Silver automatically recognizes where the bird is leading them and urges his classmates to come along.

As he suspects, the love guru bird guides them all to a lagoon far off from the town and teeming with wildlife. It drops Dylla's hat into a small abandoned rowboat by the shore, which Lilia scoops up and replaces on her head. He’s not bothered by the chase—his eyes sparkle with wanderlust, and he mouths something to her, waving at the boat. It’s an invitation to ride out with him, which she agrees to.

Lilia bows like a faithful attendant and gestures for her to step on. She does—wobbles at the instability of the water that the boat is upon, and Lilia swoops in, steadying her and leading her by the hand on.

He goes afterwards, nestling between the oars and startling to propel them to the center of the lake. They grow smaller and smaller, until… “Crap, they’re going to go way too far into the water for us to keep up with them,” Deuce curses. “How are we supposed to give them support like this?”

That's when Sebek gets surprisingly smug and declares that at times like these, one should create the right mood with music! "In the old days, the nobility of Briar Valley would sing sweet serenades to win hearts!! This lake is the perfect location for it, as the still waters will carry voices well." ("Oh yeah? And how are we gonna get them to serenade each other in this day and age, dumbass?" Ace asks cheekily.)

"Simple!" Sebek straightens the lapels on his jacket. "I SHALL BE THE ONE TO PROVIDE THE ROMANTIC AMBIENCE!!" This sends Ace into a laughing fit that hits so hard he doubles over, clutching onto his stomach as Sebek clears his throat, preparing for his performance. Silver quietly slips his hands over his bird friend's ears.

Out on the lake, Lilia's pointing to various constellations in the sky and telling the tales associated with each. Dylla's eyes sparkle as he regales her with the heroic exploits of the demigod Hercules, the firefly that fell in love with a star called Evangeline, the star that brought a puppet to life, the great kings of the past, the second star to the right--named for the boy who never wanted to grow up...

Deuce isn't ready for it when Sebek belts out the first note. It's ear-splittingly loud and scratchy, like a poor animal on its deathbed croaking its last word. The boys collapse to the ground, shielding their poor ears and shouting for Sebek to stop.

Dylla grimaces at the sound. "Did you hear something?" she asks Lilia. He simply claims, "No, nothing."

"You're screwing this up!" Ace hisses at Sebek. "There's gotta be some other way for us to make music."

"Wait, I've got it!!" Deuce says--and with the wave of his magical pen... "Come forth, cauldron!" It lands in front of him with a colossal THUNK, and while the rest of the boys stare, Deuce looks pleased with himself. "It can work as drums!"

"I won't be bested by the likes of a human!! If you're going to play the drums, then... then... THEN I WILL PLAY THE VIOLIN!" Sebek summons the instrument with his own magic, only to be stopped by Ace.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! I heard from Epel that you suck at the violin! Can't you pick something else?!"

"THE YOUNG MASTER IS SKILLED AT PLAYING THE STRINGS, SO THAT IS WHAT I, TOO, SHALL PLAY!! I REFUSE TO COMPROMISE ON THIS MATTER!!"

"Tch. You never listen to anyone, do you..." Ace heaves a sigh. "Well, whatever. I'm not about to waste more energy arguing. Just playing the instruments from here won't do much, so I'll use my wind magic to amplify the sound."

“We have percussion, strings, and winds then. All that’s left for a romantic song is… words.” Silver looks at each of his classmates in turn. “I will accept this task, since I’ve yet to be assigned a role. There is one love song I know of from father, so I hope it will suffice.”

The bird on his shoulder tweets, letting the boys know he, too, will lend his help. With the flap of his wings, he takes flight once more, spreading word of their cause to the animals in the surrounding area. They rally like a performance troop, fanning out through the lake and readying for a musical number.

As their discordant song swells up, propelled by Ace's winds, the lake comes to life with sweet birdsong and humming fish. Silver gathers his breath and releases it, singing the words to a song once performed by the friends of a mermaid princess. "There you see her, sitting there across the way..."

"I'm sure I hear something this time," Dylla says, craning her head to look around the lake. "Someone's playing music and... singing?"

"Really? I don't hear it," Lilia says, giving the oars another row. As they pull up from the water, Dylla startles at the frogs that stand upon the oars in a neat line. They look like they've assembled for choir, ribbiting in harmony until Lilia dips the oars back into the lake water.

"Something strange is definitely going on here! How can you not hear it now?" (He shrugs.)

The boat drifts along to an area blanketed by willow trees. Two storks swoop down, parting the leaves for them to enter. When the leaves fall down, they're curtained away from the rest of the world, secluded with one another. There's only each other, and the soft glow of fireflies warming them.

Lilia stops rowing the boat. He checks to make sure the coast is clear, then leans closer to Dylla, a knowing grin at his lips. "Sorry! I didn't want to ruin the boys' fun so I went along with it and pretended to be none the wiser. We should be safe now though--they can't see us thanks to this shroud." He gestures to the willows draped around them.

"My hearing is quite sharp." Lilia cups an ear, as if to demonstrate. "It sounds like Silver, Deuce, and... Ace and Sebek, two of their classmates! Sebek in particular is difficult to not notice--his voice is very loud."

"What are they doing all the way out here?"

Lilia laughs softly. "It seems there's been a bit of a misunderstanding on their part. Someone has convinced them that this--" He waves at the space between them. "--what we have here, is something more."

Dylla face settles into a solemn expression. “Oh no, I’m sorry that Deuce is causing you trouble. He’s probably got it in his head that I'd be happier if I found a new husband and jumped at the first other single parent he knew... Deuce gets overexcited sometimes and doesn’t know when to stop once he’s started. My boy can be as stubborn as a mule, but he shouldn't be putting pressure on you to feel a certain way."

"Don't worry! Silver's doing the very same." Lilia lets his head rest on a shoulder as he looks out at the lake. “I haven’t given much thought to finding a significant other myself. Happiness isn’t inherently tied to marriage after all. It’s something we all seek out and discover for ourselves.”

Dylla finds herself smiling a little at Lilia's words. In all the time she has spoken with him, he's mostly been silly--but he also knows when to pull back and to speak seriously. There's a sense of comfort and security to Lilia.

"It's funny, isn't it? Our children are nearly adults now, yet they're still as innocent as they ever were. They wish for our happiness so much that they've taken it upon themselves to make it a reality. There is a simplicity and a selflessness to that. They mean well, they're just going about it in their own way. We can give them stern talking-tos when we return, no need to get to it now."

"... You're exactly the kind of role model Deuce needs in his life."

"Be careful what you wish for, dear," Lilia says with a wink. "I just might sweep you off your feet. I can't help it if you fall for me, you know? I'm too cute to resist."

"Hahaha, now you're just getting smart with me!" Dylla playfully shoves him in the chest--a little too hard, not recognizing her own strength. Lilia wobbles, the boat wobbling with him. He grips it to steady them both, but they're already teetering, and... SPLOOSH!!

The boat tips over, dumping both Lilia and Dylla in the icy waters. Luckily for them, the lake isn't that deep so while they're sopping wet and shivering, they're still safe.

“Are you okay?” Dylla calls out to Lilia. He responds with a laugh, splashing her with water. It’s a direct hit on her face!! Wiping off the water dripping from her features, she growls, “Alright, I get your game! You wanna play? Then let’s play.”

Back across the lake, the boys’ song had finished. Deuce shades his eyes and gazes at the willow trees. “… How do you think they’re doing in there?” Deuce nervously wonders.

“OBVIOUSLY LIL… Er, I mean, SILVER’S FATHER THAT IS DEFINITELY NOT LILIA-SAMA MUST BE THE CAUSE FOR HER SWOONING!!”

“Man, just say that you think the date’s going well. That’s way too many words for what you actually want to say.”

Silver strains his ears and listens. The soft sounds of nature are punctuated with laughter and squealing beyond the weeping willows. His father, and Mrs. Spade, and the joy they experienced in each other’s company. “I think… we don’t need to worry.”

And so the hectic day ended happily ever after.

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