#and leaving them dirty in the sink
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currently missing blind date au...spare hcs ?🥺
Babes for you, always!
Blind date au Bosco kept a very tidy space...before Jasmine. Before their room was immaculate, with everything in it's correct place, the aesthetic absolutely air-tight and visionary, the plants well kept and artfully arranged. Post Jasmine it's just like three chapsticks of Jasmine's on the floor, bedsheets everywhere, bra hanging over the balcony, Jasmine's dried up contacts sitting on the night stand. It's a total wreck, but Bosco tries not to be bothered by it because thats just the way Jasmine lives.
Off of that, Jasmine and Bosco have a lovely home. It's well designed and often photographed for the magazines when they do the spreads of famous people's homes. Their home is one of Bosco's proudest creations—a little bit quirky, the perfect balance between the natural greenery and minimalist aesthetic Bosco loves and the outlandish colors and patterns and maximalism Jasmine loves.
Bosco and Jasmine's "dorky old people hobby" is definitely scrapbooking. Bosco of course thinks all their work is immaculate as is, but has to admit that there's something special about a wine-tipsy Jasmine, practically in Bosco's lap, reaching for a cat sticker to seal down a picture of Aveyah and Theo first meeting Tito and Tobi.
#also this is where i add in the fact that bosco's got their own cats now#which wow it's got to be in all the aus like i've got to integrate those little babies in any way i can#because on a personal note grey cats are my ultimate favorite just the absolute sweetest babies#also i'm working on designing the homes/apartments of my au in the sims#i've got the socialite au penthouse done rn#and would be more than happy to share it#and make the various blind date au apartments as well#anything to distract me from writing am i right aha#but also daya is really shocked that bosco's just cool with having jasmine's stuff all over their apartment#daya's just sitting there like *you threw a whole fit when I had a girl over and she left one (1) glass in the sink*#and bosco's like yeah that was one of your hook ups#drinking my wine#out of my cups#and leaving them dirty in the sink#this is different because it's my jazzy#and daya probably has to straight up leave like she's not ready for another *my jazzycakes* speech that ends in them not being gfs#also i'm down for more blind date au if we have more questions!!#for anon#asks answered#jasco blind date au
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Ok everyone I have a very important question for you. No judgement I am genuinely just curious because this strikes me as so odd
#every single roommate i've had has left their dirty dishes in the sink and i'm??? because my mom would flip if i did that#right now we have two sinks but only one of them can ever be used because the other is always full of dishes#and most of the time there's still at least one dish in the other sink too. trying to fill water is an act of trying not to brush#against food particles with the bottom of whatever vessel i'm trying to fill#it's just weird to me. you're limiting your space? also leaving food bits out for days is how you get bugs... :/#anyways i can't always do my dishes right away (low energy/motivation) but like. i stack them in a designated area in my room#why the sink?#storyrambles#my polls#maybe there's some wisdom to this i'm not understanding.
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okay one of my flatmates is really fucking starting to piss me off lmao
#i am away for. Four days.#i come back. 10 pm. the shared compost bin i washed and left to dry in the rack the day before i left is still where i put it. instead of#moving it (Extremely Simple Fucking Action) she has chosen to dry her dishes by balancing them on the rim of the sink. the sink itself has#food scraps in it. jars with bits of food still in are standing on the counter and i know from experience i'll snap and bring those#to the recycling bins before she does. i start scrubbing things because leaving My Kitchen unclean upsets me on a molecular level and she#walks by and all she says is a grunted hello#and i could tolerate this ALL FINE i could think ah she's just busy probably! but when other flatmate (beloved) and i attempted to initiate#a chore chart system so that kitchen and bathroom get regularly and properly cleaned#at the end of the month she was like well i hate kitchen duty because i don't think i should have to clean up your messes. i cleaned the#kitchen once this month and an hour later it was dirty again. woman 1. sorry for fucking using the kitchen 2. you cleaned the kitchen ONCE?#in a MONTH? 3. you did not fucking clean up our messes. i know for a fucking fact i was putting away your dishes on a daily basis i would#looove to know what the fuck you considered cleaning up my mess#anyway. long story short thank fucking christ she's moving out at the end of spring semester otherwise i'd snap and write her a very#pettily snide whatsapp message
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came home acutely aware of how much goodwill and compassion i am willing to offer others. and not that it's stingy by any means. but it has a hard limit.
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Just tore apart the kitchen looking for my matcha latte mix that was put in a usually out of reach place by my father (the power of petty "where the fuck is my latte mix" knows no physical bounds) and upon realising that I couldn't even make an iced latte because we have no ice either I proceeded to stick my latte in the fridge for half an hour. my cottagecore lifestyle is in shambles. will report back if it chilled it or not
#my posts#I have been searching for this mix for several months btw. the frantic search only brought on by the fact that I have wanted to cook#for three days but been unable to due to food poisoning and the Day I feel well enough to cook my father leaves out Every Pot We Own#dirty around the sink and on the stove#And you may be saying 'oh can't you just clean them?'#To which I say no. the sink was so full and even if I did clean it there was nowhere to put it that wasn't covered in More dirty stuff#also fuck dude I can't stand for more than an hour if I cleaned all that I'd be out of energy. also that's like. his one job in the house so#yes I am ranting now over smth small. I am pissed and feeling sick from searching for like half an hour. fuck
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in every lifetime i would choose an unemployed man that cleans up after himself over a ceo that doesnt do his dishes
#yes i know theres plenty unemployed men that dont clean up after themselves dont bring me such pessimism#im just saying im sick rn and not dirtying dishes and whenever i do. find i am cleaning so many because my mother is bedridden#and her bf too useless to clean his own let alone hers -_- like ffs i was raised clean them immediately leave nothing in the sink#if i cook i clean the pots before i eat. i dont want that waiting for me unless i burnt it and it needs a soak lol#squeaks
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adding a "lol" to the end of my messages as if im not seething with rage
#if you use my stuff please CLEAN IT ive been STARING at one of my cups for days thats been empty with a little bit of liquid in the bottom#AND I DIDNT WANNA CLEAN IT SINCE SOMEONE ELSE USED IT AND ALSO SHE IS SICK RIGHT NOW#LIKE#HEY#HEYYY#PLEASE.#UM ^_^#DONT USE MY SHIT AND THEN JUST LEAVE IT?!!!! PLEASE CLEAN MY CUPS IF YOU USE THEM#ESPECIALLYYYYYYYYY the TERVIS CUPS!!! IVE HAD THOSE FOR YEARS!!! THEY WILL GET NASTY AND FOGGY!!! THESE ONES ARENT LIKE THAT#BECAUSE IVE TAKEN CARE OF THEM!!!!!#im gonna#ghhh#i have to be Meaner. stop leaving dishes everywhere. stop using my shit and then not CLEANING it.#I KEEP ASKING THEM!! TO CLEAN THEIR OWN DISHES!!! CAUSE WR HAVE A TINY ASS SINK!!#WE DONT HAVE THE SPAAAACCCEEEEEEE FOR DIRTY DISHES!!! CLEAN THAT SHIT IMMEDIATELY
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i think one of the most annoying things about my sister being here for two-three months is having to go back to being her third parent
#zenith.txt#especially when she tells me that WE are going to do xyz which of course mean that /I/ will do everything as she watches#and takes credit#& this is for everything like i made the brownies i cleaned up the kitchen i made dinner i decorated the house i put together the furniture#its wouldnt be so bad if she actually HELPED#and if i didnt have to tell her to clean up her mess every two seconds like the garbage can is right there.#its not hard to fo your dishes why am i cleaning a sink full of dishes and none of them are mine#better question why are you leaving unrinsed dirty dishes with food in them in the sink for days#and the worst part is i am her YOUNGER sibling
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my friends roommate left her dishes for over a week in the sink so my friend put them in a box and put them in her roommates room 💀 i love her
#how can u leave ur dirty dishes in the sink for over a week!!#she had went on vacation and left them#and returned and still didnt do them
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in an unfortunate series of events due to (involuntary) sleep deprivation (loud music bass ppl screaming below my window until 4am) the first thing i did this morning was drop an entire box of tiny caterpillars (alive) (over 60 caterpillars) on the floor
#LUCKILY. most of them were clinging to leaves and some stayed in the box#so i didnt have to pick too many out of my carpet#i then proceeded to drop an opened blister of allergy meds into dirty sink water.#also just accidentally covered myself in chocolate shavings :)#I need to go to sleep but consider this: i still havent done my work for today#personal#m.txt
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not to be pissy but when your older sibling who is your roommate tells you in an asshole-y way to do something (that you specifically find disgusting) because they find it disgusting rn (because of their own actions) instead of trying to ask you as an equal….. well.
#timothy's txts.#i am fucking pissed. i wasn’t home. i didn’t make the trash smell awful and i didn’t dirty the dishes AND I DIDNT LEAVE UNRINSED NASTY DISHE#DISHES IN THE SINK#and now i’m the one washing them and taking it out (which seems to be a fucking trend now)#this is. oh i want to bite something#i’m gonna talk to them about the fact that they’re not treating me like an equal#tw swearing#tw caps
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Ok my parents need to stop moving my shit bc I’m about ready to explode on them.
#they put my perfectly clean and filled up water bottle in the fucking sink with dirty ass dishes#and then proceeded to get upset when I poured the water out and cleaned it#like. dude. it was in there with dirty fucking dishes of COURSE I’m going to clean it#also if you pick up a heavy ass water bottle that feels full why the fuck would you put it in the sink#goddamn I just left it on the counter and forgot it there fucking ask me goddamn#sorry I’m just annoyed#like they move my shit all the fucking time and put it in places I DO NOT want it#and I barely have any space in there#and they’ve also fucked up my food before#so I’m very annoyed#I’m about ready to tell them when I go back out#like please leave my shit alone#I’m already forgetful as it is…
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one day I'd like to move in with my partner but during this spring cleaning weekend I'm just relearning that I'm fucking insanely type A. like. 'why is ur backpack on the floor in the living room? do we need to install a hook for you?' or like. 'it's spring now why are u taking up limited vestibule space with ur snow shoes and hats and mitts?'
and then my partner will be like 'I put a bike. TWO bikes in my front room.' and his roomies are blessedly lackadaisical cause they just live with bikes in the front room without complaint.
if there were bikes in MY front room, I would probably get up in the middle of the night and stab my roommate. so. dunno where this leaves me except that I'm certified insane and not interested in changing that.
#mika rambles on#this is for all the type As out there#it IS valid to kill your roommate if they leave a dirty dish in the sink#DOUBLY VALID to kill them if the dirty dish is left OVERNIGHT#it's fine going into other people's houses and letting them live how they want#but I just can't live like that in my own house... I can't...
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Buckle up for another unhinged story time. Now, as I’ve said before, I used to work at a sex shop. At one point I had three roommates and we all worked the same dildo slinging retail job and lived together. It was extremely sitcom.
Now, as you’d imagine, living with three other people who also talked about sex toys all day created a microcosm of people who were all extremely comfortable around sex toys and related topics. No one left dirty toys laying around but seeing things left in showers or showing off a new purchase was just a Tuesday.
After some life upheavals I ended up living with one of those roommates again, just me and her. For the sake of this story let’s call her Betty. Betty and I shared a two bedroom, and the layout was all the common spaces were an open floor plan and then one hallway formed a T, with my room and bathroom to the left and Betty’s to the right.
Well, one day my cousin calls me up. He’s coming to town for a visit and I offer to put up him, his wife, and their more… sheltered friend. (Unbeknownst to me there was a full Briefing for this girl before she met me so that I didn’t overwhelm her with my blasé attitudes towards- well, most things).
They drove in from two states over and it was a long drive. I had to work and couldn’t greet them or spend the first day together. So I told them to come grab my key so they could all shower off and settle in before me.
I arrived home later that night and found the atmosphere a little awkward at first. Things quickly warmed up and I charmed their friend, impressing my cousin with my immaculate respect for personal comfort levels. We had a lovely evening. By the time we all said goodnight I’d dismissed the initial tension as being tired after a long drive.
The next day we all decided to go to the zoo. I’m a morning shower person, but I let them go first while I made breakfast. After breakfast it was my turn and I hopped in the shower.
Midway through my eyes fixed on it. A little pink sex toy, sitting brazenly on the rim of the tub. Oh no, I thought. This was why things had been awkward yesterday! I left out a personal object because I’d literally forgotten to ever put them away by that point.
What I felt wasn’t embarrassment per se, because that emotion had been utterly eradicated by that point. Rather it was a deep shame that I’d leave out something that might make a guest feel uncomfortable. They told me their friend was sheltered and I had left out a sex toy, it was the epitome of rudeness!
I rejoined everyone and said, “I am so sorry! I didn’t realize I’d left that in the shower, that was so rude of me!”
My guests all exchanged a Look. I looked from my cousin to his wife, she glanced toward their friend, and their friend looked at my cousin. No one would look at me.
“Well…” my cousin finally said, “you didn’t tell us which room was yours yesterday.”
I blinked in confusion, Betty’s room and bathroom were basically just like mine.
“When we got here,” his wife continued, “we went to the other side first. In Betty’s bathroom.”
Reader, Betty’s bathroom.
Had been absolutely covered in dildos. Sex toys of all shapes and sizes covered every flat surface, the tub rim, the sink, the shelves. Wall to wall sex toys. Apparently Betty was doing a spring cleaning and had left her entire extensive collection out to air dry.
These three weary travelers had opened a door to the dildo dimension and had no idea how to react. To this day I have no idea what context clues they used to figure out Betty’s room from mine.
But when I’d come home they were lost in the sex toy shell shock, presumably wondering how they could ever talk about it with someone who felt it was okay to leave out every sex toy they own when expecting company in some kind of bizarre power play.
By the time they finished telling me about this we were all laughing so hard we were in tears.
“When we saw your bathroom with one little pink toy it was so discreet we didn’t even care!” They told me.
After my cousin and his crew had gone on their way I finally told Betty the whole story. She listened with eyes growing wider and wider and finally burst out, “That’s why they were so weird when I got home!!”
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I can't stand people who leave bread CRUMBS in the cream cheese or the butter. if you don't wipe that knife before you double dip it or scrape out the remnants of crumb when you're done we're gonna fight.
#there are very particular things I hate like ppl leaving dirty bowls out or putting them in the sink without rinsing them out#or leaving used spoons with coffee pooled in them on the counter. I will kill you
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it turned to smut in seconds, i cannot control my own hands, ok. 18+ (implication of breeding kink or something and simon's a jealous boy)
ex-husband simon who signed the divorce papers without a fight. it'd stung, you're not gonna lie, but it needed to be done and the fact that he didn't make a big fuss about it made things easier for you physically. (emotionally you were in shambles because did he not even want to try and fight for you?)
he comes over only on the weekends when he's on leave.
he's a good father to his boys. he takes them to their softball games when he can, buys them the ice cream and takes them toy shopping.
and then there's a sharp knock at your door on a wednesday afternoon.
"simon?"
he walks in like he owns the place, which technically he does- even pays the mortgage because there's no way you would be able to afford living here with your own measly income.
"what's this the boys are tellin' me 'bout a man bein' in here?" his voice is calm, steady. but you know simon better than you know yourself, and he's furious.
"i- i'm not sure-" he swipes his hand in the air and your mouth clicks shut.
"don't lie t'me, poppet, or i'll be findin' him myself an' you really don't want tha'."
what man? there hasn't been any since the divorce! you're digging through your memories, scrambling to find what the hell he's talking about when-
"oh! it's the plumber!" you take steadying breath. "i called a plumber on sunday. i needed the kitchen sink fixed."
his dark eyes are piercing, so sharp they could cut. simon's always been a walking lie detector, and it's unnerving to be on the opposite end of that analyzing stare.
he nods imperceptibly, then flicks his gaze to behind you, over your head. "show me."
you scoff indignantly. "show you what? the bloody sink?"
simon wordlessly heads to the kitchen and his knees pop as he kneels-
he's actually checking the fucking sink.
with a grunt, he leans his head into the cabinet and twist awkwardly which is no doubt causing a familiar pain to flare up in his lower back. you can't help but wince in sympathy.
lo and behold, there's a shiny, white elbow in the middle of the rest of the dirty, scratched pipe.
he hums, and rises to his feet, closing the cabinet with his leg.
simon approaches you slowly, fingertips touching the kitchen island as he rounds it. "palms flat on the counter, sweetheart."
oh. oh you know exactly what that means, and your pussy throbs almost in reflex. months without his touch and your body still responds the same.
your protest already at the tip of your tongue, almost involuntarily because principles, but he sees right through you, as he's always done.
"jus' a reward for all o' your hard work. takin' care o' the boys is a stressful job all on its own." his worn hand cups the underside of your jaw tenderly. "aren't i always good t'ya?"
your exhales are weak, just like your resolve. "okay."
simon's eyes glint with satisfaction as he lifts his hand, index pointing upwards and twirls it in a slow, deliberate motion.
your palms are flat on the counter when he curls his fingers into the waistband of your shorts and knickers, tugging them downward.
they're flat on the counter when he lowers himself to his knees and taps the inside of your foot, indicating you to widen your stance.
they're curled into fists when his breath puffs against your slick cunt and his warm tongue slides through your folds, drawing lazy circles around your bud. a tingle of arousal shoots up your spine, his mouth sparking a fire right under your navel.
they're reaching for simon, nails sinking into the delicate skin of his wrist as your back bows when you come on his tongue, vision spotted with black, blurry dots and white hot ecstasy coursing through your veins.
your hands are now crossed at the base of your spine, your cheek pressing into the cool kitchen counter as he bends you over it.
"15 minutes before the boys are home from school. tha's plenty o'time, yeah?"
a rhetorical, if you've ever heard one.
your knuckles stain white as you clench your fists at the heavy, hot weight of his manhood stretching your walls to take him in, a sweet burn that you've always loved. he's gentle but sure, bottoming out in one smooth stroke that pushes the air out of your lungs. the sibilant hiss simon lets out is never fails to elicit a whimper out of you.
"fuck," he groans. "i could stay inside this pretty pussy forever."
and the dirty talk. how much you've missed it.
"would you like tha', pet? be inside of ya til you don't know where i end and you begin?"
a garbled mhm slips past your lips. your head already empty at just the sensation of being so unbearably full that it feels like you're tearing at the seams.
"another time, then, since the kids'll be home soon."
he begins to move, shallow but firm thrusts that drag his cock along your nerves deliciously- a sure fire way of getting you to climax around him in minutes.
your walls begin to squeeze down as the knot in your stomach tightens, and he lets go of your wrists, looping an arm around your waist and straightens you- his broad chest to your much smaller back.
his clever fingers wind downwards, and rub precise, little circles on your slippery clit, and it's all too much, you're hurtling toward the precipice at neck break speed- "god, simon, please-"
his pace never falters, not his hips nor his fingers as your moans begin to rise in pitch. "i'll get ya there, love."
he does, he gets you to your highest peak- blindingly intense- one that chokes the very breath out of you and slackens your knees. "i've got ya."
there's no strength left in you to brace for the spine-jarring thrusts he gives after, the only thing keeping you from sprawling forward is the arm that's looped around you as he pulls you to him.
"on anything?" he rumbles.
your ears ring at that because he can't possibly- your head shakes unbidden.
"good."
the last four thrusts are heavy, backed by his weight, and he smothers a loud groan into the junction of your shoulder as he finishes inside of you- thick, viscous cum filling you until it begins to drip and fall to the floor with an audible plop.
he presses tender little kisses to your sweaty shoulder and nips the side of your neck. "just in time."
the clock on the stove says 5 minutes before the bus gets there.
he helps you redress, chuckling under his breath when you won't look him in the eye. "i'll get the kids, go get cleaned up."
the knot in your chest loosens when you hear the boys' laughter at seeing their father on the driveway. it loosens when simon picks both of them up, one in each arm, and glances up at you as you look down at them from the window.
heat licks up your cheeks when he gives you a smarmy little grin.
idiot.
#call of duty#simon ghost riley#simon ghost riley x f reader#simon ghost riley smut#simon ghost riley x reader#cod mw2#simon ghost riley x you#simon riley smut#cod smut#cod mwii#simon riley#ghost smut
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