#and have to do it again on Thurs
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The fact that my reaction to “I mixed up Tuesday and Thursday so I have nothing to do for 2 hours” with “ima get starbucks and read Naruto fanfiction” really says a lot about me I think.
#personal#i feel Stupid lol but also i cant go home bc class isin 2 hours so#-shrug emoji-#mostly im upset I spent money on coffee and fodd#and the train ride here and back from suburgatory#which..probably also tells you something about me#mostly that im a millenial and Jesus The Economy#nah but fr i wanna cry why ami like this lmao;A;#( i had a meeting on Thursday...that i thought was today#..yeah idk)#my parents are gonna be pissed too and thats also :x bc imma have to tell them i spent money on the train/complicated shit for nothing#and have to do it again on Thurs#...yeah imma go read now
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i wish all boothill wanters to be boothill havers ♥ i will be pulling for my girl fu xuan in the meantime uvu also, apologies for not being here! i know this is set as low activity as it is but work has just been a bit draining because we're short-staffed so i haven't had the motivation to write a lot. but i'm alright! just tired ajshjsa
#* ∙ ☆ ◞ 𝐎𝐎𝐂 ❮ out of character. ❯#( im gonna pull for her once my partner is here from work )#( we have this gacha tradition LMAO )#( i do have her guaranteed so like hehehe )#( also !! ill attempt some ic stuff here but no guarantees )#( i have two ten hour shifts back to back thurs + fri )#( soo yea :> ill be alright again saturday i think )
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Today was my last Friday off for the foreseeable future from my job before I go back to having Wednesdays off to accommodate our severe understaffing issue on the Friday/Saturdays we’re open and I did absolutely nothing with my day today, but I do hope having a day off in the middle of the week from here on out will hopefully improve my motivation and help get me to start making appointments for stuff and the likes of that.
#personal#Ignore this. I’m thinking out loud#Having Fridays off was nice because I know we can get busy on Fridays which I’m not looking forward to but also like-#Working a four day stretch 10-12 hours a day Mon-Thurs definitely made me NOT want to get out of bed come my Fridays off.#I was not built for a five day stretch work week I think. I’m somewhat relieved going back to doing 2 days having off a day then 3 days.#Also I don’t know why I said ‘foreseeable future’ either. I have off the whole weekend including that Friday in two weeks for my birthday.#I thought I was going on a mini solo trip but I am now NOT and doing a staycation of sorts.#Again sorry. I am thinking out loud. I also have a toothache currently and I am trying to distract myself.
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my dad: yeah i'll be there at 3:30p
me, like a normal person: gets ready & is all set to go by 3:30p literally on the dot.
my dad at 3:45p: sike i'll actually be there at 4:30p
me: great :) love this :)
#liveblogging life#i am a chronic on time person precisely bc i grew up with two parents who could not be on time to save their fucking lives#like im not perfect about it but generally if i say i'm going to see you at a certain time#i will make every effort to get there either precisely on time or 5-10m early#the early thing is what's leftover from japan i think - i always had to be 15m early to stuff there and it's just kind of stuck tbh#but im also neurotic about it - tbh it irritates me SO much when people say a certain time for meeting & then are super late#like i get being a little late or w/e but when it's like 30+ minutes....#my sister's friend was supposed to pick up her kids on thurs & she was like 45m past the time she said she was going to come#and i was going BANANAS like lady i planned the rest of my evening around you being on time! i have places to be! jesus christ!#idk man i feel like im pretty easy going about most things but something about tardiness really unlocks my inner pta mom demon#also irritated bc he was supposed to be picking me up for driving practice#and now that he's going to be an hour late we no longer have time to do it bc we have to be at dinner at 5p#so like. great! there goes an hour i really could have used for practice!#and with. very little time left before im supposed to retake the test and hopefully not fail again lmao
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got discharged from the er home and showered i was there umm like nine hours. my final message: fibroid warriors assemble! not for long tho (hysterectomy this yr, maybe i can get it pushed up now lmao)
#i got a lot of scans and labs everything looked good except i said hey do i have endometriosis or something and the docs said maybe lets#look. came back after a couple ultrasounds and were like well we cant diagnose u bcuz it needs a camera but looks like u hve fibroids#well i was KIND of right okay!#anyway i dont rly have specific and exact answers they just told me a lot of things it ISNT and said i wasnt in like#a life threatening dangerous situation rn everything seems like ok im just in pain. so gonna go to my doc app on thursday#they might order a ct scan. the hospital was backed up it was so fucking busy they fucked up and discharged me early and didnt tell me and#had to resign me back in hours later after id been waiting there i had to get in the queue again t was a whole thing.#anyway my point w that was the ct scan thingy was a 6 hour wait they said#and i was like. nah. ill wait. the doc on thurs can order one and get me in like a walk-in why would i not sleep tonight#and spend more time in the er aka the scariest place in the world
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other libraries - even small ones! - are out here doing fun stuff all the time meanwhile my boss hasnt even ordered new books since january
#i want to make like a survey for families w kids about what programs we'd like to see#bc i was talking about how my friends library and my old job have done stuffy sleepovers which are so cute and something we could easily do#and my boss was just like we did one of those a few years ago and only one kid did it :(#and shes like we could do one again but would be worth it if no one comes :(#and its just like. so we're just never gonna do anything???#it is inconvenient bc we're only open tues wed thurs sat so theres not a good day where kids can pick up their toys the next morning but ug#the problem is she just does not care about kids programming#she only does adult programs for stuff she is interested in#and to be fair my storytimes dont have a huge turnout but i just#i want to do SOMETHING more#r.txt#library tag
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the goal (the dream, the hope, the plan) is to finish reading for all my classes tonight and write my final paper for methods and final exam for wcc this weekend wish me luck yell at me if u see me
#i WILL finish the readings tonight i only have 2 left#then tomorrow i'll write my last journal entry for one of my classes#and then i think sat i'm gonna write my wcc paper and sunday my methods one#bc i have the methods presentation on tuesday. so i can write up and present on that. and then correct it tuesday / wednesday with whatever#needs to be fixed based off the feedback from the presentation#and then submit that#i have 3 meetings on monday so that's. fun.#but hopefully i get my dataset approved for the proficiency paper#sobs softly#ooc.#tbd.#anyway busy buzz buzz but freeing up? sort of?#next week is the last week of classes but i will be in stats hell yet again#my last assignment is due on the 20th so i will be working on that mon tues wed and thurs probably#and then my final is the 25th#which if things pan out will be the ONLY thing i have that week#and then i drive home#no getting trapped in chicago this time#me: then i have a month off#the reality: will be doing data collection full time (aka 40 hours a week)
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...
#how is it that i can get only like 6hrs of sleep. go for an hr run up a mountain and still b wired#like ??? make it make sense??? im not even a lil tired. im considering going up thr mountain again#how does my body do this? im not even euphoric. i just habe too much energy#i just wanna smash things with a baseball bat. its so weird. i guess its not really an issue. i just dont understand it which bothers me#its either a mood thing or the hyper disorder :-/ but like idk how i havent noticed it before#like have i always been like that? i have evidence going back to 2019 but i didnt actually notice it until the last year for real#...i guess there is maybe a reason i didnt have so much energy before this but ya kno#whatever. i can try to find a therapist in like 10 days or something. so ill try to figure it out lol#idk im just vibing bc im sorta unemployed rn. i mean ive been hired as a TA but dont meet for that until thurs but im not at my research#assistant job anymore as of Friday. so i can do whatever tf i want. except im still working on my data 🙃 bc im fucked up like that#hopefully the energy lasts. or maybe not bc idk how i would fucking sit in an office at a desk like this#jesus. im like: me having adhd is impossible. but also me: having to do 3 things at once to pay attention and fucking dancing while i liste#bc i cant sit still. listen. i wont believe it until someone diagnoses me. but it wouldn't not make sense#ugh. i wanna run up the mountain again. but last time i was running twice a day to get rid of energy i fucked up my leg and its still#fucked up. but like not enough thst it hurts to walk so i still run on it. maybe ill go see a doctor once my new insurance kicks in lmao#oh Jesus my brain. maybe im just happy to havr all my insurance bullshit cleared up. i guess thats a bonus to living in like libertari4n#land. less regulations than my last state in terms of car insurance lmao#or maybe im nervous abt thr start of the semester. its gonna b a fucking wild ride lol#unrelated
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i’m about to be so gODDAMN BUSY IM SO 😭😭 my manager scheduled me for four days out of the five i’ll be here for this week. i’m gonna be so tired :,) but the week after that i’ll have three shifts max and then i’m done working there so. i must persevere. plus i need money after the amount i spent in guatemala LOL
#rip me#i have the horrible sneaking suspicion i’ll be working three days in a row#first thurs + friday#no work saturday#then sunday + monday and i bet she’ll put me on tuesday as well#then no work wednesday bc i have it off#and again i bet she’ll do thursday + friday then i’m DONE#then along with that i have to finish shopping for my apt#finish my modules for orientation#meet with friends before we all move away (which is great but still makes me busy)#go to dance practices for seven#and simultaneously not lose my mind and die of anxiety hehehe#anyways it’s okay tho#HAHAHA#IM SO EXCITED AND SCARED AT THE SAME TIME GUYS I CANT#［ on : ria tries to be interesting %.
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I am at my Limit :)
#I decided to do a meal kit delivery thing again#bc 1. Im bored with my usual dishes#2. living alone it is so hard to portion food for just myself without some of it going to waste#3. it’ll work out to be about the same or less than groceries anyway#and the first delivery was supposed to be today#i very specifically planned it to be delivered on Mondays bc i work from home#and Tues weds thurs im in the office#BUT the delivery has been delayed until tomorrow for some mysterious reason 🙃🙃🙃#I just got back from nj for thanksgiving I haven’t gone food shopping specifically bc this was supposed to be delivered today#I don’t have anything besides snack food rn :))))#and eggs… I don’t want to make eggs…
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goooood morning from my beautiful green living room. we got up at 6:15 today (sleeping in lol). I have had a busy morning so far—long meeting with my boss + shorter meetings with the HR team and my team lead. but now I am done with being on calls for the day and can dig into this stupid graphic design work (HUGE sigh). I do not want to do it at ALL so I am trying to break it down into smaller steps.
distill this super unwieldy overview they gave me into a simplified timeline
look at canva + articulate for timeline options (choose the simplest possible version)
input info into timeline graphic
finish copying over images and priorities into leadership section
look in the canva business section for simple templates for project recommendations
marshal my strength and figure out what next steps are (I’m so bored my brain is shutting down lol I can’t figure out what else needs to happen). figure out if there’s anything more I need to do today… then tomorrow
I am going to allow myself to do no work for 20 min (until 11am) and then I will get up and try to do a burst of concentrated work from 11-12 to get through as much of that list as possible. then I will take a break and look for my preexisting letters for these students to figure out how much new drafting I need to do. hopefully not much??
#i feel TIRED today#but maybe it’s just the transition back after holiday weekend#okay I can do this. I do need to have a draft of this module to review with the office director tomorrow#and then it would be just a huuuuge bonus if I could submit these rec letters or get them pretty close#but they’re not officially due till thurs so I have some breathing room#the other must-do is I gotta call target guest services to arrange a return pickup#and I REALLY need to call the car leasing company I just have spent 40 min on hold with them twice now#and it is physically painful to imagine calling them again AAAAAAA#but maybe I’ll put them on at 11 when I start working again since I’ll already be miserable (graphic design my beloathèd)
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mx. cineplex i sincerely hope you die btw
#.txt#spent an hour trying to decide when to watch the rise of gru. my friend group has such incompatible schedules. and then its like the theatre#near us is only showing it until this thurs. but NOW its saying its showing it on friday too . and that other theatres are showing it next#week as well even tho they ALL said the 7th was the last day. kms#anyway we decided on watching it at someones house yesterday after changing the date 5 times and now that its in theatres for longer we#might change the date AGAIN what the hell#oh for fucks sake most of the theatres near us are only showing it till thurs the 7th except for a few that have showings only at timings we#can't DO. lord
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i am now on break AAAAA FINALLY <3
#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚#this post is 8 hours late#okay technically we still have. school tmrw?? non-academic tho <3#finished playing xiv for today and i can't play automata bcs i need to Wait ... nto sure what i should play#7 remake wld be cool but i hate doing the 1st boss </3 i miss ffxv but i think i don't have enough space </3#i'm too cowardly for ds3 and bloodborne ... gow is my biggest choice i think#tho i asked my dad to ask tita what are the ps/switch games she has so!!! i think we can get stuff from her this thurs <3#i can finally ... play octopath again ... and 3h ...
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I hope when they see me tomorrow rhey see how much pain I'm in and are like "we can't do anything until March but since your our specialest boy here's more codeine prescription for you sweetheart until then ❤️ and gallon ice cream prescription. we love you"
#I'm literally trembling just like chilling rn lawl. Waiting for it to be awesome again and making mac and cheese for softmeal#I actually don't know how I'm going to survive 10 more days of work in-between this#Well actually like .. I have tomorrow off and then I'm on thrus and fri#And then have just that mon-thurs to get through .. I can maybe do this .. ughhh#But even being at home doing nothing suuucks
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i am CRANKY and i do NOT want to be at work right now
#grace rambles#fuck this job#i worked back to back 11 hr days tues and wed#and im working again on friday#fun fact: my days are sun-thurs except for most weeks when there is an event on friday or saturday#so i often have 6 day weeks#with normalish office hrs of 9-4#and then evening meetings for me to come back to#do i have the flexibility to block my time so i come in later when i have night meetings??#in theory yes#in practice i got too much shit to do bc im doing the work of 2.5 pol#get me out of here#i dont want to decorate worship spaces any more
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Of course the activity I want to do that involves free time and me feeling good… I can’t figure out the phrasing of this but I’ve either not had free time or not felt good
#that thing is drawing! specifically artfight!#we’ve had guests almost for all of July so my room becomes the guest room and I don’t have my own space#(I do not want to be looked at as I draw)#and then I was sick for a few days#and the last couple days I’ve had Sad and Tired#maybe wednesday!! or thurs but then family’s in again for a couple days and I just rrrrrrgh#really wanted this to be a thing I committed to this month#random thoughts
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