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#and going back to being insane full time
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Wasn’t gonna make another part but I had these saved so 🤷
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puppyeared · 6 months
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save me old flipnote studio MVs.......
#im going thru old flipnotes i used to watch years ago and ouggghhg so many good ones#is twenty one pilots still popular.... do people still remember the TRNDSTTER and marble soda meme.........#its like im unlocking some sort of primal part of my brain and everything is coming back to me. one of my biggest inspirations as a kid#i still remember thinking the final transmission lyrics were the coolest thing and watching =TopHat= Bee and Melissa over and over#theres a very specific feeling of longing and nostalgia looking back and watching these again years later#especially when there isnt anything genshin or mcyt and instead its either fnaf undertale eddsworld or another obscure#interest... and not even fnaf sister location its like fnaf 3 and 2. its THAT old. and a lot of oc MVs especially pokemon ocs and furries..#god but they were so creative u know. i still find it amazing ppl took this little lightbox animation on the fucking NINTENDO DS and#cranked it all the way to 11.. like if u look at the transitions and movement its so fucking fluid its insane..!! HOW DO YOU MAKE THE#CHARACTERS SPIN??? AND CHANGING CAMERA ANGLES??? and keep in mind youre doing this all with a shitty stylus#on a THREE BY TWO INCH SCREEN. you only get two layers you can go up to 29FPS and you only have 999 slides to work with#and 24FPS eats up a lot of that. absolutely insane it literally boggles my mind every time i think about it. AND SOME ARE EVEN FULL COLOR#i forgot how popular EDM was back then too...they were really good for timing beats though so you get a lot of MVs with#strobe last and marble soda. porter robinsons goodbye to a world was also popular with undertale and oc MVs. also a lot of vocaloid#someone made a flipnote abt the warner bros fnaf movie being announced EIGHT FUCKING YEARS AGO. it even used the stay calm audio from#the office.... i wonder how theyre doing now... i love you shitty grainy MV audio.. but i have mixed feelings abt the flashing colors#ppl LOVED animating the sans vs frisk fight. aishite and primadonna were also big ones they were SICK AS FUCK#lots of these inspired my old oc designs.. a lot of my characters had side bangs with one eye covered. animal ears and simple eyes too#now i kinda wanna try my hand at the marble soda meme cause i loved it as a kid lol.. i wonder if i should compare my old and new art here#UGHHHH IM SO NORMAL ABOUT NOSTALGIA. IM SO NORMAL ABT MY SCHOOL BOOK DRAWINGS WITH SHIBA BROWS#yapping#nostalgia
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krispiecake · 1 year
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i hope that everyone is aware that i am trying SO HARD to be normal but the universe is TESTING ME.
#i am trying ao hard not to fall back into old habits rn but jesus CHRIST brooooooooo#i havent been able to get barely any time with the staff i need for the past two days and now#theyre like 40mins late with my meds bc of another tenant#and its not even like theyre WITH the other tenant rn btw there are two members of staff sat in the office just talking#and its like bro. BROOOOOOOO#like they know this shit is SO triggering and i know they cant help some stuff but i still feel like i should be able to get my meds on time#if they arent actively with another tenant#its such a small thing but it helps my brain remember that actually they do still care abt me lol#all ive wanted to do since like wednesday was just watch a movie with my fp now that we’re cool again#and i was waiting in the lounge for like an hour and no one even came in#and its not like we planned anything so im not mad or whatever im just frustrated that#i had a rlly shit night last night and a pretty shit day today#and there just isnt anyone around to talk to bc theyre all dealing with someone else#or not even just sat around talking or whatever#idk this shit makes me wanna punch things burn everything to the ground and then kill myself if im being totally honest rn#and like last night and this isnt my therapists fault or anything but ahe wasnt able to pick up#and i managed to get thru it but it just added to the feeling like no one gave a shit#and its past nine again so she probs wouldnt be able to pick up now even tho i kinda need help again#idk this shit just. its so fucking triggering and i feel insane and so tightly wound#and ive been putting so much effort into my stupid therapy and i just wanna let go and have a full on meltdown again#i wanna take a bunch of pills and scream and cry and throw things and argue and just LET GO#cuz i feel like thats my ‘true nature’ and everything else is just me faking#or masking#AND IM SO FUCKING SICK OF IT ITS SO MUCH EFFORT AND I FEEL LIKE IM GETTING NOTHING BACK
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villainsidestep · 2 months
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(hums loudly) much to think abt
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mainfaggot · 4 months
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oh also shes straight
#and the part of me thats empty hopeless and constantly passively suicidal scores a goal!#a win for the agony within!#a loss for whimsy hope and serenity and the part of the me that is trying to heal and move forward without the weight of it all defining me.#it's like. im not surprised. why did i have expectations#why did i hope. i shouldnt hope. im so stupid. i shouldnt hope i should know better than that. im scarily lacking substance. im a shell#im a puppet. i cant form lasting relationships im an actor im a liar it would've never worked anyway#-> me going insane in real time#-> i sound so dramatic like go watch txt to do and chill out maybe ⁉️#idk lol 😐#im not giving up bc she said we should hang out again and friendship is always an option and she already#knows too much about me at this point so it's too late to back out#here is to befriending her for the sake of allowing myself to exist imperfectly and for the sake of hanging out with someone every week for#funsies and nothing else. we dont need to have some grand connection. she doesn't need to have a crush on me. we can just be#on campus buddies#we can meet during the summer at some points too maybe#idk. idk i want to disappear i think bc i really feel like i embarrassed myself by being so open about my insecurities#i should've put on the mask i usually wear#but i didnt#and everything thats pathetic about me was on full display#i don't know. god. i dont know#what matters is i made her smile a few times. my unnecessary commentary got a laugh out of her a few times too#the world is still spinning#the air was refreshingly chilly on my way home today#i got rained on and came to class looking beautiful despite my carefully slicked back hair falling into my eyes#my spanish professor agreed with my thoughts on the text we were analysing#z.post
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immamapletreekid · 5 months
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playing pokemon black... started tearing up at skyarrow bridge
#THE SKYARROW BRIDGE THEME MAKES ME SO EMOTIONAL BUT IM NOT EVEN SURE WHY?????#POKEMKN MAKES ME SO EMOTIONAL AND I DO KNOW WHY!!!!!#god i wish i could have played it growing up... i have a ds but no actual cartridge and pokemon gamws sell for crazy amounts#i want to olay it on the ds for the full experience#one of my goals in life is to have my own copies of pokemon bw and platinum...#pokemon makes me cry. i love pokemon i love running around collectijg friends and battling cool people#idk i think 7 year old me tjougjt it was so cool how adults in games were so much kinder and cooler tjan real life adults#imagine being a gym leader and archeologist?!?!?!! a member od the elite four who fucking. shoots a guy w hyper beam point blank#i love lance hes insane#IMAGINE BEING CHAMPION OF HOENN! BEING HEIR TO THE LARGEST COMPANY IN HOENN! AND BEING A ROCK ENTHUSIAST WHO CAN SPEND HIS DAYS TRAVELLIMG T#HE WORLD LOOKING FOR RARE STONES!!! STEVEN STONE IS LIVING THE LIFE I WANT#but also i get so sad bc. when i first got into pokemon i was several years younger than the protags#when i first watched pokeani i was younger than ash!!!!! and now i am old :(#never going to br able to go back to spending summer vacation curled up at home going through 7 volumes of pokespe a day...#never goijg to be able to waych anipoke during winter break under a pillow fort again...#never goijg to be ahle to experience listening to n's farewell and the striaton city theme and skyarrow bridge theme and eterna forest and#littleroot town and nimbasa city and cianwood city and#so many other pieces for the first time again#rambling finished i guess first days of class make me cranky and sad#going ti go back to playijg pokemon black again...going to walk around castelia city and scream#rambling about stuff#rambling about pokemon
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hella1975 · 1 year
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the 'i totally wrecked my walls' saga gets funnier bc ive spent the past few days trying to figure out how tf to get out of the inevitable fine and one thing i joked about was that i have a lot of hard hitters on my side if shit really does get nasty. like my flatmate's mum is an actual soliciter, my dad is a finance guy who can write an email so scathing you'll cry, my local friend's family owns half the property in the city and knows all the tricks of the trade when it comes to housing, and then there's just my mum who was like 'oh yeah i regularly used to dodge rent in my twenties. you'll be fine' and somehow she's the one im finding the most reassuring rn
#my mum looking at these insanely qualified people knowing she can one up them with the sheer experience gained from being poor#and she's right too. that's the fuck of it all#like she was trying to reassure me bc i nervously said to her 'im gonna be honest im NOT paying that fine if it comes to it'#bc im not! i dont deserve to! this tenancy has been a shithouse start to finish they have NO RIGHT to fine me over a dirty wall#like it does NOT cost that much to just go over it with some paint and it's not like i have a deposit for them to withhold from me#and i said to my mum thinking she'd be a responsible parent about it and be like 'no legally you HAVE to or they'll take it to court'#but she was so fucking unbothered she was like 'yeah when i was your age i literally couldn't afford to lose my deposit#so to ensure i still got it at the end of the year id just pretend my rent was late for however many weeks the deposit covered#and then id just leave. like id just leave without saying anything'#and that was that 😭 girl ffs. like her advice was really just 'call their bluff bc 9 times out of 10 they wont take you to court'#LEAST of all over an £80 fine for a bit of dirt on a wall. like lets be real here. i'll threaten to leave a review of all the shit#we've put up with during this tenancy and that'll be that i KNOW they'll roll over bc they've done it before we literally got rent back#for the first week at the start of the year bc people complained. im standing my ground#so even if the worst case scenario comes about that i cant salvage the walls and i do get fined#i now have full parental consent to just fucking dodge it LMFAOOOO#hella goes to uni
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Hello hi yes I’m not dead. Where have I been the past two ish weeks? Looking for motivation to do anything but that’s not the point of this post. The point of this post is to share some art. So
There are spoilers for the ending of Ride the Cyclone under the cut so be warned okay now onto the art
For a little background, @fitheghosty created this AU for Ride the Cyclone that’s absolutely consumed my mind. The rough concept goes that after Penny is brought back the choir is also thrown back into the living world as ghosts that only Penny can see. Penny doesn’t remember them, and vice versa, BUT in one of her posts, Fi mentioned Penny summoning the choir. I’m perfectly aware there’s probably a completely different way it went but that doesn’t stop my brain from imagining it going a little something like this…
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aequitaes · 1 year
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melto · 1 year
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i'll stop feeling like everyone is mocking me once i actually spend time with my friends everything will be ok then
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I’m a musician and I recognize the need for practice BUT JESUS FUCKING CHRIST DOES EVERYONE IN THIS HOUSE HAVE TO PRACTICE THEIR INSTRUMENTS AT EVERY HOUR OF THE DAY
I’m trying to get shit done and the constant noise is sucking the life out of me. The man finished the whole upstairs himself for his instruments and didn’t even think of soundproofing for recording purposes. I haven’t even found a place yet and I’m already looking at soundproofing.
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pepprs · 1 year
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hi update things are fucking terrible and my eyes hurt from sobbing. lol
#purrs#delete later#not to liveblog and be tmi or whatever but i feel terribly alone and terribly miserable so this is in fact a cry for help lol. or really#comfort bc im fucking going insane. so for context last spring when i was still an intern another intern orchestrated this back channel#where everyone was supposed to talk shit about our supervisors (my dearest most belovedest mentors) and all of us hid it for months and it#all came to a head at asb 2022 because there was a lot of drama witb the asb student facilitators and our staff team. and it was sooooo ugly#and messy and horrible and probably played a direct role in one of my dearest beloved est mentors (who was the point person for asb) fucking#getting a new job and abandoning us in july lol 😃😃😃😃😃😃😃 and so i became a full time staff member and me and my remaining dearest belovedest#colleague besties fucking carried the world on oh r shoulders and put on amazing programs as just 3 of us in the core staff and we thought w#we were doing a really good job with the asb 2023 leaders and that there were no drama dynamics or whatever and guess fucking what. tonight#we found out that half of them hate us for reasons we still don’t know and all of them are at each others throats and also some of the#participants feel a type of way about us. and i know i am being a fragile sensitive crybaby over it but i have had terrible cramps all day a#and have barely slept since ive been here and feel like ive been bending over backwards to support the leaders only to find out that half of#them think we’re evil and i just… i couldn’t take it. so i cried and now im beating myself up for crying. but it’s like come ON. i know we#did a pretty imperfect job of preparing them for this. and i should just take responsibility for that and not be defensive. but it’s like… i#have NEVER seen this program in person before or been part of the planning of it. i was just a student last year like all of you. and also#HOW many fucking times did we create space for you to talk to us and invite us in. and still this shit happened. and i just feel like a#failure. and i couldn’t react to that information in any way except cry liek it’s all so over my head and out of my depth and im not as#emotionally mature as my colleagues bc im the youngest and this is my first time dealing with this and i feel so incompetent and like i#failed. failed the first time by not speaking up when i was implicated in the stupid fucking Google form back channel situation last year#and now failed the second time by not being able to prevent this stupid drama bullshit from happening again and for not catching it. and jfs#like… im in excruciating physical pain and haven’t slept and haven’t eaten well and my life is falling apart and we were ABANDONED BY THE#PERSON WHO WAS RESPONDIBLE FOR THIS (i know we weren’t abandoned she literally just got a new job i just have psychological issues) and#we’ve been running at a million miles per hour with absolutely no break and now you’re mad at us and not even telling us and it’s impacting#everyone’s experiences but you want to pretend this is fucking high school and keep secrets. i am TIRED of drama. i am TIRED of this stupid#bullshit. and not to say this bc i don’t know if asb 2022 drama factored into her decision to leave but if it did i get why * left now. i#get it. bc this shit makes me want to jump out the hotel window. i do not want to face any of them tomorrow and deal with more bullshit. i#am emotionally unstable and incompetent and not equipped to deal with this in a mature healthy way. i want this to be over NOW. im done.#ok i think that’s it um. sorry about that i just needed other people to know i am suffering and i will suppress the shame i feel about that#just this once. esp bc i denied myself the opportunity for my colleague besties to comfort me while i was crying and i regret it now lol
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starlooove · 1 year
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Batfam YouTube AU except it’s not the batfam it’s just Duke:
I actually don’t think he’d have multiple channels, I think he’d have every single kind of his vids on one big one with a bunch of playlists u can pick and choose from. His vids are mainly 3 things: book/film critiques, Parkour vids, and hate to say it but a messy ass tea page.
The parkour vids are mainly taken in Gotham but if Brucie Wayne is traveling and Duke goes along, he’ll make some wherever they are too. He has subsections of parkour vids and his faves are the “trying to beat my fastest time at X” and “is this possible?” Which is him recreating famous parkour scenes from movies or tv shows. Sometimes he posts vids where he shows the best ways to get away from the rogues in a pinch and call for help depending on where you are.
The book/film critiques are everyone’s favorite tbh. The thing about him is that he’s kinda mean. He doesn’t care about hurting the creators feelings because, as he puts it, “if you didn’t wanna get your feelings hurt you should’ve produced something better.” He’s so pretentious and snobby and it’s honestly the worst side of him coming out but he’s so right that nobody can really correct or call him out without sounding whiny because he doesn’t target anything personal, he’s simply critiquing the content.
The tea page….he could give Vicki Vale a run for her money. Duke’s tea page has honestly been doing more for protecting secret identities than anything any heroes done since heroism became a thing. Because when it comes to Duke’s channel, NOBODY is safe. He goes after heroes, villains, and civilian alike. It’s never anything doxxing or dangerous or whatever but he DID notice the rumors about Batman being Bruce Wayne’s sugar baby and he’d love to discuss the proof for and against it. Theories about whether the Girl Robin is real or if they just made her up, does Lex Luthor wanna fuck Superman, are Batman and Catwoman EVER gonna tie the knot? At one point the channel gets banned because of some shady shit (more ppl were tuning into it than to the Gotham Gazette) and Brucie Wayne was so offended that he had half a mind to buy YouTube and delete everything. Duke had a new vid up the next day talking all about it 🚶🏾‍♂️
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megafreeman · 9 months
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Its insane how many people here, when criticizing staff's shitty decision making, they completely fail to take into account how IT companies actually work and just spew bullshit like its some gotcha at the staff. Yall are making all of us rightfully criticizing their terrible decisions like fools that have no idea what they're talking about.
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cheekblush · 10 months
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feeling very embarrassed about the thinness of my life tonight...
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the lonely city: adventures in the art of being alone by olivia laing
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I’ve not been knitting for the past month due to a mixture of factors. But I have had some off and on work on several projects. Featured here are a kite shawl, an unblocked lace doily knit in worsted weight cotton, the most evil baby blanket i’ve ever had the displeasure of creating with my own hands, and yarn for a future sweater.
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