#and depictions of sh but it’s very blurry | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

caged-nights · 1 month

Text

🥀The Shadow in the Mirror🗡️- ONE SHOT [Pre-Stellarium]

⚠️CONTENT WARNING⚠️: Hallucinations, Delusions, and Graphic Depictions of SH

A rewritten piece of one I did back in 2022. This was originally supposed to be a quick piece to showcase Venueri's destructive tendencies that turned into 5 pages of nonsense very quickly.

As the TW above says, please keep in mind that there will be heavy SH in the story.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:**:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

✧ Sitting at the vanity in her expansive yet so empty bedroom, Venueri stared at her reflection with slight contempt.

VENUERI: [“Look at yourself…”]

✧ Brushing the parted bangs more to the side, her eyes locked onto the marking that decorated her forehead.

✧ Her brows furrowed,

VENUERI: [“...why did I inherit this?”]

✧ With her pupils akin to slits and her vision going out of focus, she could hear the voice of someone play in her head.

MALUM: [“I love your markings, Venueri! There’s no need to feel shame over them.”]

✧ Such simple words, words that would once bring her comfort, now made her nauseous.

✧ She gripped the edge of the vanity with such strength that her claw-like nails made new grooves in the wood.

VENUERI: “Calm down… Calm down…”

✧ An useless effort, she knew that, she has done this before.

✧ Feeling something move behind her, she manages to shoot her eyes back up to the mirror before her.

VENUERI: “!!!!”

✧ She froze in place.

MALUM: “...Venueri.”

✧ She couldn't make a sound as her winged ears lowered in panic and fear.

✧ She felt like she was going to vomit.

MALUM: “Why did you do it, Venueri?”

✧ Those were words that have haunted her for years and years.

✧ The shadowy figure stared her down from over her shoulder as she tried to mutter out an answer.

VENUERI: “I…I…I didn’t—”

✧ The shadow shook his head.

MALUM: “I trusted you, Venueri.”

✧ Her hands trembled as he spoke.

MALUM: “You betrayed me.”

✧ The shadow moved closer, making her want to curl up and hide.

MALUM: “You could have saved me. Us.”

VENUERI: “What could I have done…?”

✧ The part of her mind begging her to think spoke out before an onslaught of laughter came from behind her.

✧ Their whispers like the cicadas in the summer buzzed in her ears before a hand gripped her shoulder

MALUM: “Ven… I’m right here.”

✧ She looked into the blurry face of the man behind her, his smile managing to feel the same as it used to.

✧ With her shoulder tense and her breathing becoming short, she waited for him to speak.

MALUM: “You’re… a protector, right?”

✧ His smile was charming,

MALUM: “Why didn’t you help us?”

✧ The water began to well in her eyes,

VENUERI: “I…”

MALUM: “Surely we were worth protecting.”

✧ Every word was another bullet wound to the chest.

VENUERI: “I couldn’t save you… Mother would have—”

✧ She could barely get that out before the Malum that stood by her now began speaking again.

MALUM: “Why did you allow her to do such things?”

✧ She knew the answer to that.

VENUERI: “Nothing could have been done; Mother’s words are absolute!”

✧ She glanced back at her own reflection for a split-second.

✧ She looked horrified.

✧ Malum shook his head in seeming disapproval.

MALUM: “Absolute? Simply because she labeled herself as a God?”

✧ Tears made themselves known as they dripped down her cheeks.

VENUERI: “She punishes us if we don’t!”

✧ Images of her sister’s arm being ripped clean off her body in a ruthless display by their Mother flashed for a moment as if to remind her of her place.

✧ Somewhere deep down, however…

MALUM: “You deserve such punishment.”

✧ She somehow agreed.

✧ As if commanded, her eyes take their focus off the mirror and to a knife that laid only somewhat hidden under a cloth.

✧ It’s the least she deserves.

✧ The voices of others chattered endlessly as the shadowy figure of Malum gestured to the clean knife.

MALUM: “You know you do.”

✧ Like she was possessed, her hands reach for the knife while the chorus of voices grew.

✧ “You deserve this.”

✧ “It’s only fair!”

✧ “You should have saved them.”

✧ “You’re too weak to do anything.”

✧ “You’ll never be able to protect anything you love.”

✧ Her fingers wrapped around the handle of the knife a little too tightly as she brought it closer to her person.

✧ While her grip was choking, her hands still shook.

✧ She hesitated for a moment,

MALUM: “You know, it really makes me happy when you bleed.”

✧ Any other state of mind and Venueri would have known those words did not belong to her dear friend.

✧ But, here– now…

✧ The tip of the knife met with the pale, porcelain skin of her arm.

VENUERI: “I deserve this…It’s the least I can do…”

✧ The blade slices open in a clean line.

✧ The jeering and mocking voices become softer as her world seems to spin.

✧ Another cut is made hastily.

VENUERI: “I’m sorry.”

✧ And another.

VENUERI: “It should have been me.”

✧ Soon, the warm red of stardust and nebula blood is dribbling down to the hardwood floors and onto her nightgown; her whole arm is covered in large gashes.

✧ The sight and scent of her own blood made her feel dizzy.

VENUERI: “I’m a monster; a demon– a devil.”

✧ The knife in her hand moved from her arm to the marks on her hands.

✧ The knife made quick work in mauling up her hand as she sucked air in through her gritted, sharp teeth.

MALUM: [“I love your markings, Ven—”]

✧ Markings…

✧ Those words from the past made her look up into the mirror once again.

✧ Markings….

✧ Her eyes lock onto the mark on her forehead.

MALUM: [“The Goddess is your Mother?”]

✧ Words like knives come flooding to her head.

✧ Snarling and throwing the knife down, she opts for her sharp nails.

✧ She no longer bothered to hide her sobbing as her nails like claws scratch and claw at her forehead.

✧ The stardust and nebula red drip down her face while she wails,

VENUERI: “Why?! Why?!”

✧ What she was exactly asking and to whom was beyond even her.

✧ Her tears and blood mix together, the stinging of her wounds making her even more delirious.

VENUERI: “Why did it have to be him? Why did it have to be them?!”

MALUM: “Venueri, I—”

✧ She swore she could hear Malum saying something, the outside world felt so far away even though he was right there.

✧ The voices of the others whispered mockingly, of how she was repenting, of how her blood and suffering was so small compared to those she had failed.

✧ Hands laid gently on her shoulders, urging her to look up.

MALUM: “Venueri.”

✧ He opened his mouth, but she didn’t hear anything.

✧ Just the crackling static and nonsense filled her ears.

VENUERI: “I’m hopeless;”

✧ She spoke to the reflection in a daze.

MALUM: “Venueri.”

✧ He speaks her name again.

VENUERI: “Worthless.”

✧ She looks at Malum’s reflection as it twists and contorts.

✧ The smile he wore filled with blood, dripping down his face.

✧ The bloody holes she had left him with start taking up his body.

✧ So… many… holes…

MALUM: “V e n u e r i…”

✧ She could see that he was wrapping his arms around her, but she couldn’t feel him.

✧ She was numb.

✧ The Malum that stood before her met her eyes, somehow, in the mirror.

✧ The words he would say synchronizing with those of the past long gone.

MALUM: “I love you—”

✧ And within a flash—

✧ All of them vanished. It all went utterly silent.

VENUERI: “What?”

✧ Bewildered, Venueri goes to stand from the chair.

✧ Her eyes, now dull and lifeless, glance around the room.

✧ Where did they…?

✧ The weight of a thousand suns seemed to suddenly fall upon her, getting heavier with every step she took around the room.

✧ When she finally made it to the large bed, all her strength was spent, and she fell over onto the covers.

✧ Her eyes drooping, she somehow still finds the energy to mutter to herself.

✧ Her questions to her Mother and her pleas would fade as she slowly allowed the urge to rest finally overtake her.

✧ Closing her eyes, her consciousness would fade, allowing her a small moment of peace.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:**:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

*:･ﾟENDﾟ: *

4 notes · View notes

iloveyouemanuelmarco · 2 months

Text

Edit/Update: Hi guys, sorry for spamming you with a giant wall of texts and such that could pass for more consistent keysmashing sessions atleast, I was sorta breaking out of reality and my brain was malfunctioning, causing all my thoughts to come vomiting out of my mind and repeating at once. Super not-poggers/pogchamp of me, innit?/Ironic. Anyways you can still read it if you want but just know that I'm better now x).

[Please remember my post is currently still updating so if certain bunches of information on here is changed or added then understand why atleast, thank you!;))

My introductory pinned master-textpost for my new Tumblr Dot Com (main/non-laternative)blog page(I am probably gonna update it once I am able to get my lazy, couch potato butt off my bed and learn blow to make/post a carrd or rentry but I don't know yet so please be patient with me as it's all under construction atleast to my knowledge since my brain can be super blurry when it comes to memory♡. Anyways, My page is now gonna start loading so please wait!!:[■■■■■■■■■■•100%].(Apps I Use: Gacha Life(2)/Gacha Club By Lunime Games, Alight Motion, IbisPaintX, Medibang, Capcut, Kinemaster, FilmoraGo, PowerDirector, Canva, Picsart, ClipStudioPaint and more probably but it depends).

☆Tag Guidelist!!☆:#Mani/Marco Speaks: Rants, vents and over all just stuttering on and over my autistic rambles except I am having a complex time attempting to explain my more complicated thoughts on the internet instead of irl TwT. #Mani/Marco Draws/Animates/Writes: You can probably guess what those tags are for atleast xP. #Mani/Marco Does (Sh)Art(Crack stuff and shitposts). How many fandoms am I in?: Idk too many to count for a huge interweb community hoarder like me Q^Q!!<3

☆Other Tags(Updating)!!☆:#ROTD:IMF/Road Of The Dead: One More Future: Tag for my Road Of The Dead/Saga Of The Dead OC x Canon Angst Alternate Universe Webcomic. FNAR: TOTNG/Five Night's At Rose's: Tales Of The Nightguards is for my other alternate universe fanfiction/webcomic except it's for Fnaf instead of my obscure hyperfix and Spider Scene: My Spidersona OC tag lol(=^=)♡.

(Please Read my pinned textpost as such content contains necessary media and information involving my introduction aka my about me section I guess along with my before you follow, do not interact criteria and boundaries as they are currently so thank you for reading such and have a wonderous day or night wherever you are on the beautiful home planet known as Earth moving forward♡. I appreciate the care and support for me and my variety of content I attempt to put out for you all:)!!♡ Please follow me on my other active social media platforms if you want to keep up with my gay buff anime boy and cute yuri manga stuff xD!!): Ok, so I am sorta bored at the moment right now and I wanted to make an updated pinned but more specifically a masterpost explaining my future projects and stuff involving my art skills and other talents being used to make such so here I am with such a untidy and barely passing for somewhat clean mess of an information-dumping session QwQ. Oki doki, here I go, here's my chance at one and becoming soon to be huge in numbers on the interwebs!!0^0.

Content Warning: The written, animated and/or drawn material you're about to start reading/looking at does have the possibility of containing future(non-sexualized, feltishized, objectified or romaticized)dark themes that may upset the average guest of my main/non-alternative Tumblr Dot Com Blog page such as fictional depictions of gore/blood/guts, violence/murder/abuse, different forms of physical self-destructive habits and other nsfl fictional stuff that may be traumatic or at the very least inappropriate for younger auidences, suggestive or lewd but non-pornographic/nsfw-ish but not literally pornogrpahic content and more. At the very least, proceed with caution and for your own safety please leave if you're uncomfortable on/sensitive to certain videos of mine and for those who choose to stay regardless, please again be careful and don't be afraid to take a step away for your own care and concern when it comes to yourself . Thanks for your cooperation☆. I know my page's cutesy/kawaii-aesthetic copying nature can be quite deceiving in it's depiction of such a user like me. I am not trying 5o be rude or anything, but I just want to keep you safe atleast is all...viewer discretion is advised!! And if that's not bad enough, here's another cause for a much more huge concern...old and cringeworthy meme death content ahead along with a very constant petty and sassy mood I do not have the courage to express irl obviously >.<!!♡But what can I say, sometimes I miss being an online internet mean-girl but whatever I guess sorry for ranting in my attempt to expand my internet horizons for new chances of opportunities for popularity and going viral somehow- heck ughh-!!Now Playing: World Is Mine By Supercell Feat. Hatsune Miku!!

☆[1:52 ─〇───── 4:14]☆

(One more note, due to my identity not only being a mess if gender and sexuality but also of my brain malfunctioning and causing my autistic ADHDer person to go insane with paranoia, I am starting to use both singular(I/Me/Mine)and plural(Us/We/Ours)pronouns when referring to myself as an attempt at a non-harmful coping mechanism for future reference atleast so please be calm and collected with me as I take the time and effort to construct our sentences together in a way that is easy to explain and somewhat makes sense haha. I don't want anyone to become upset and confused by anything I say or do so is that alright? Good, kay and thx on that, bai).

Hai babes, it’s you know who and I am back again for a round two, F.B.I open up!☆(o0ω0o) But anyways srsly, we’ve become more polite and caring since we’ve carried on away from the last of the past so for the new ones that I haven’t seen yet since I’ve used the site then, henlo and konichiwa everybunny!!^-^Welcome and thank you for stopping by to my official one and only brand Tumblr Dot Com blogging page, kind wandering strangers of the internet(and hopefully future adoring fans)!!Meowdy, my name is Emanuel Or Marco and since I'm back for more, I guess it's time for my masochistic self to get a round too in internet tormentation(Is that a real word??Idk but it's gonna be apart of my vocabulary now I mean uhh 0.o. Please trust me I am 100 percent a super smarty pants!!You just haven't found out about my true power yet!!>:[). Hmph, my name is Emanuel or Marco and thank you for stopping by to visit my official Tumblr Blog or something like that since I'm gonna be your host for today hehe~ Lmfao currently I am a 16 year old[mostly-digital]artist and animator who is multifandom but mostly draws fictional gay thick or big-booty buff men in a 2000s anime/manga inspired artstyle which sometimes leans on the "kawaii" or moe side and other times is somewhat based off of edgy amature art stuff from the older side of the internet[Think of the super cringeworthy stuff you'd find on NewGrounds, YouTube or DeviantArt back somewhere around 2007]. When I draw different stuff related to my interests, it may get on the side of edgelord content such as gore/blood/guts/violence/weapons[Fictional NSFL btw], creepy/horror related content, suggestive or NSFW[Not really]self-indulgent stuff, maybe venting if I feel ready to be open like that sometimes I guess it depends and OTPs along with OCxCanon content and crackshipping. If you're uncomfortable with any of that then please for your own saftey leave my page and take care of yourself thank you♡. I don't know what other stuff to put here other than I've recently started working on my idea for a Five Night's At Freddy's self-insert alternate universe fanmade-webcomic and a Saga Of The Dead/Road Of The Dead fanmade comic game continuation due to it being an on and off hyperfixation and special interest of mine roflmao. Anygays, the reason I came or am coming back to here is because of the simple fact that the internet is just being more dumb than it was before so ever since then, we’ve decided to make the choice of expanding our horizons when it comes to making content hehe lol(Sorta masochistic of me? Yes-, but do I care?…No). So…yep, Hope you don’t mind us as you hop in, have fun joining the ride and stay tuned for more♡(o^-^o)) For some random facts about us, some of our professions include watching anime, reading mangas, playing videogames(otaku and gamergirl-boyish), drawing our ocs, writing stories, songs or poems, listening to pop-punk nightcore, being scenemo(Scene kid+Emo), baking, looking at funny memes(or at the very least whats funny based off of my broken sense of humor-;m;), making videos, streaming and roleplay though I don’t have any hyperfixations at the moment haha. If you need us to tag any of the fandoms we’re in, please DM us cause I love our moots >:3c Yippee!!

To get more into about who I am as a person without accidentally violating my own privacy and saftey, I am a somewhat gender-nonconforming or genderfluid/bigender??(Idfk, man)bisexual aceflux FtM/transgender man who uses both he/she pronouns but please don't use they on me thx. While I am apart of the LGBTQIA+ communtiy on the interwebs I am also a professionally dxed autistic and ADHDer who may get distracted irl and go afk somewhat so if I suddenly disappear for a couple days or something on other social media platforms I hopefully haven't been murdered/j(Please use tone tags with me if asked since I do have a hard time reading social norms irl okay thank you). I want to try a polyamrous or queerplatonic relationship with other people in the future but not now obviously since I still need to work on being better when it comes to the mental health department lol xD(I am stone faced as I am typing lol). I am a white-latine person who is making an attempt to learn more about his culture and to understand more of the language but sometimes I may struggle due to cognitive difficulties so please keep that in mind and be patient with me...My DMs are open 24/7 in looking for new mutuals on here but I may be somewhat vulgar or off putting under my overly-cautious mom-friend nature once you get to know me. That being said don't be afraid to tell me if I am making you uncomfortable in any sort of way due to that or if I'm accidentally supporting someone or something problematic in nature ok? Good. To keep in mind of what I am gonna post on here, it's probably very stereotypically fanboyish or some sort of dumbassery depending on the context but then again it's my page so Idfc :]. Main fandoms are mostly hyperfixations or special interests of some sort such as Undertale/Deltarue including AUs, Five Night's At Freddy's(Both the canon and sometimes the OG 2014 Rebornica nightguards au) and the Saga Of The Dead or specifically for me the Road Of The Dead 2010 Newgrounds flash games by EvilDogGames and SickDeathFiend(one of my more obscure??obsessions). Other things related to cartoons and videogames I really find comfort in are My Little Pony:Friendship Is Magic, Minecraft? Roblox, YouTubers, Vocaloid/Utaloid related content, Spider-Man: Across The Spiderverse, EddsWorld, Invader Zim, Pokémon, Postal, Hatred, Team Fortress 2 and admittedly some Friday Night Funkin'(I know it's dumb sorry about that). There's definitely more but I can't really list them all rn so yeah that's about it for this section.

When it comes to music, my taste is pretty diverse though I do have some obviously favourite genres but I am always looking to expand my horizons and more. Bands such as Green Day, Three Days Grace, SlipKnot, Korn, My Chemical Romance, System Of A Down, Linkin Park, Falling In Reverse(I am a Ronnie Radke hater though, so far he seems like another douchebag asshole), Asking Alexandria, Sleeping With Sirens, Sum-41, Pierce The Veil,, Black Veil Brides, Falling In Reverse, Set It Off, Get Scared and Bring Me The Horizon just to name a few. Though if you want my preferred genres when picking stuff I guess that would include stuff like Nightcore(not technically a genre but shut up please/lh), Rock, Pop-Punk, Trace, Emo, Techno, Happy Hardcore, Classical, maybe Lofi and I wanna get more into Rap or Hip Hop but specifically Drill. 80s and 90s stuff is cool too, it really just depends on what I find on the internet :D. General hobbies include reading, writing which includes imaginative stories and poetry, drawing(duh), singing, dancing, helping to bake with others, cosplay or just dressing up in cute outfits at tbh, watching anime, reading manga, playing videogames, collecting figurines sometimes, roleplaying, cleaning/organization, studying earth and animal science related topics, watching cute animal videos on the interwebs, memes that suit my broken sense of humor, spending time with relatives and caring for irls who I hang out with, listening to music(who doesn't??), visual novels, robotics in fiction and irl, subcultures that were prevalent in the 2000s such as the type of fashion style you'd find on Myspace scene or emo kids, anything kawaii/cute or edgy and dark, taking naps, snuggling with my stuffed animals, learning instruments and just enjoying nature scenery on days when I am more avaliable irl. I also want to travel the world or something similar when I finally can and to learn how to code so I can program my own videogame ideas but baby steps T-T. Modern day insane derpyness and all that. Here’s a couple examples of my drawings incase you were curious ^-^:

Before you follow: I sometimes use typing quirks such as stuttering(I have a stuttering irl), I sometimes use typing quirks such as stuttering(I have a stuttering irl), saying cat phrases such as meow, nya or mew, overuse text-faces and in rare cases, using all caps when shocked or excited/happy atleast, I dunno why we do such dumbass things, but I can and I wanna I guess xP. Please use tone tags when speaking to us though, since we’re neurodivergent(AuDHD)and have a hard time picking up social cues somewhat TwT. Please be gentle with us though, we’re very fragile and sensitive. We’re not schizophrenic, psychotic or anything that could cause dangerous thoughts, but we have professionally-dxed anxiety and depression which causes us to be paranoid combined with medication on some days ;-; I sometimes may go on ahem…erm “unhinged” rants for a lack of a better word about stuff that bothers us so if we’re appearing scared and not making any sense, please snap us into and bring us back to Earth- I don’t want to accidentally hurt someone in the process of destruction and pain ;w;. Sometimes we are selective about who I interact with on my page so I may avoid you if your account looks suspicious. Please don’t automatically assume I hate you if we do that however, it’s just us wanting to be cautious and to be at our own comfort. If you’re ever sad and want to rant about your daily struggles in life, or just want to chat and make a new moot then my DMs are open 24/7 whenever we’re not busy(not gonna force you obviously if you’re uncomfy roflmao-_-). It’s not our first time online, I have an account for irls so if you somehow find me here and know who I am, no you don’t:). And another thing for our followers, if you want, you can refer to us as nekos or cats/kittens instead of those who are 100 percent human since sometimes we don’t understand the attachment to just humanity. As strange as I may seem, please don’t shame/make fun of us, even if it’s cringe, you’re no better being a bully here on our space(not to mention we have habits and a life that’s not online. Shocker, I know/sarcasm).

Do not follow or interact with me in a free-form and casual manner if you racists/xenophobic(Use AAVE when not black, islamaphobic, antisemetic and etc.) LGBTQIA+Phobic in any capactity(including transmeds/truscum, radfems, TERFS/SWERFS, radinclusives, radexclusives, those who identify with offensive labels that mock the LGBTQIA+ Community by default[Ex: Bi/Pan “Lesbians”], believe in only two genders[There’s a difference between sex and gender], believe pronouns are equivalent to gender or use pride flags who’s creators have been outed as being prejudiced or bigoted in any way[It makes marginalized people uncomfortable, stop it. Looking at you “I don’t care about queer discourse” idiots. You look dumb/srs:0]), are pro-para(Go to jail :)), are in pro-£D or pro-$H spaces, misogynistic/sexist(Unless you’re male because misandry doesn’t C:), ableist in any form(including against self-dx and if uses fonts in bio or dn),use slurs or words in specific contexts you cannot reclaim, just being discriminatiory when it’s not needed at all. MAP, Zoo or Necro(Doesn’t matter if anti-contact or not), identify with the public label of AAM, are fatphobic, believe fiction doesn’t affect reality (Examples such as proshippers, profiction, com(p)shippers, and anti-antis are some of the group names), fetishize mlm/nblm/wlw/nblw romance (fujoshi, fundashi, fujin, himejoshi, himedashi just to name a few), romanticizes abuse or mental illness in fictional stories, anti-furry/anti-otherkin/anti-fictionkin/anti-alterhuman or anti-nonhuman, anti-objectum(I don't understand or identify with these things but as long as they're not hurting anyone I support and don't find any problems with it), anti-xenogenders/anti-neopronouns, transID/RadInclus/Radqueer(You make the trans community look like morons), are a lolishotacon/kodocon(someone who is attracted to fictional minors or characters with child-like aesthetics),make inappropriate headcanons, justify fictional problematic ships, ship irl people, make jokes about serious matters such as r^pe or abvse, are uncritical about your fandoms, support the DSMP fan, DreamWasTaken stan or support mostly any of the members, supports of defends problematic public figures online(Ex: Jschlatt, Pewdiepie, CallMeCarson and etc), Trump Supporters/Alt-Right/Heavily Conservative, Prolife, excessively sexualize, romanticize or objective fictional mvrderers(We’re ok with you being a fangirl/fanboy/fan and simping moderately as long as you don’t hurt those around you with your crush by condoning the crimes and other harmful actions they’ve committed. After all, we are somewhat of a monster hugger ourselves tbh~), are an nsfw centered page, sexualize age regression or agere/practice ddlg, practice pet-play or age-play(or any other problematic kink for that matter-),make fun of someone’s triggers, missuse tonetags, does whitewashing in art or thinks “blackwashing” is real(making a character black will never be the same as taking away representation), support NFTs, AI Generated "Art" or CryptoCurrency, on EDtwt/SHtwt/TCCtwt, consider wh¡te people to be able to be systematically oppressed like other races, make RPF(Real person fanfiction), partake in cringe culture during the modern day(grow up, it’s not the anti-sjw internet phase anymore, moron) or are just a degenerate at all. Genuine mental illness fakers please fucking dni you suck and I pray no one with actual tourettes, DID/OSDD or autism cross paths with you for their sake. Lmfao stfu and gtfo). It should be obvious but anyone who's LGBTQIA-phobic, racist, xenophobic, ableist, misogynistic, islamaphobic, antisemetic, ableist, fatphobic or supports hateful and degenerate shit or problematic creators get out now before I block you<3.

Please dni if you’re apart of these fandoms unironically too: YarichinBitchClub, Kiss Him Not Me, Attack On Titan, Ms. Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid(Gonna steal the characters from the show, they don’t deserve to suffer 3:), Nekopara(Stealing those designs too, if you’re so upset about it just come at me bro- anddd…I’m blocked), Boyfriends(F♡ck you and eff off, Refrainbow<3), South Park(Unless I follow you first but you're on thin ice), Hazbin Hotel/Helluva Boss, BlueyCapsules, Your Boyfriend and Kakegurui. One more thing, dni if you fetishize the yandere/lovesick archetype or demonize those with BPD. People with the disorder and/or those who identify with Yanderes are real people who don’t deserve to be ridiculed or made into a kink fantasy. Btw for those wondering why I may follow controversial public beings on my other social medias, I just want to remind you that follows don’t equate to endorsements and that just because I’m keeping tabs on someone because I’m a nosey cyberstalker/j doesn’t mean we agree with their likes, reposts, following and etc so please consider that before making assumptions about us! P.L.U.R 4 Lyfe x3. If I end up accidentally supporting someone who may be controversial please let me know, I promise you that I’d never want to hurt anyone with who I may interact with on any active social media platform we use. Welp, I guess that’s all for now, my little space children, please be sure to hop on, have fun on the ride and stay tuned as I have a short introduction video for YouTube and a showcase in the works ^w^ We’re working very hard planning behind it all when we’re not doing homework and destroying our mind with it(Curse you, the United States Of America Education System!/lh)and remember, rawr stands for “I love you” in dinosaur xD. Rawring 20s here we come >:D)). Follow and support us and our work on the pages I run in my spare time our beautiful, amazing and divine kohais!QwQ Love you and give us gentle and sweet constructive criticism pls again >3< Arigato(Thank you) and sayonara, my waffles, pancakes, sweet bbys and more!Btw sometimes I am pretty much not here anymore on Tumblr so if I don’t post for a few months and then start posting again soon you then know why, just fyi TmT. Random thing that's not as important but Jeremy/Scout, John Creaseman, Postal Dude, William Afton/Dave Miller/Springtrap, Micheal Afton, Henry Emily, Vincent Bishop and me are in a complex polyam relationship so haters dni uwu(Please help me I wanted to die writing that emoticon *barf*). But seriously I know it's weird but they all are sort of comfort characters to me in some way shape or form so it's ok if you don't like some of them but please don't complain if you dislike them. I'll respect your opinion and you'll respect mine like civilized "adults"☆.

Oh almost forgot to put something here..here’s a list of our boundaries just incase anyone is wondering atleast!(♡=Yes/☆=Okay/✘=No)

♡-Venting in my DMs(Yes ofc!!)

♡-Compliments(Yesh, less unisex ones tho)

♡-Making fan-content(Obviously:D)

♡-Chatting(Sure, just read my BYF and DNI Criteria first!)

♡-Idolizing me(Put me up and boost our ego, yes/hj)

☆-Joke flirting(Mutuals only please, no offense to anyone or anything!!)

☆-Getting inspired by my content(I’m flattered and appreciate it, thank you for the care, but please do not out right copy or get too heavily inspired by my work! And definitely don’t steal or trace any of it).

☆-Personal questions(Again, moots only or if we’re starting to become genuine and sincere online friends though my apologies if I don’t make it through. Have our drawings as a costly pay for our future abscesses;w;)

☆-Discussing with us about our gender identity, expression and sexuality(No, I’m not gonna debate you on it. It’s my life and it’s really harmless imo).

☆-Shipping(Only if the person being shipped is okay with it and is clear it’s just a joke).

✘-Comparing me to other people(I am my person, please don’t forget that and violate that boundary since it makes us super uncomfortable).

✘-Harrassing people, attacking, doxxing, sending death threats and hurtful messages under my name(Ofc not, dummy! What are you, an idiot?!!).

✘-Making full on serious NSFW/18+ content of us(I am in a minor body, go to heck lol/srs).

✘-Sending me non-fictional violent media/fictional media involving violence to real internet content creators or other random irl ppl(Don’t be a loser and keep that stuff to yourself or expose yourself for us, give us an easily callout post to make:))

✘-Overly using curse words(I want my demographic to be a mature audience of pre-teens to teenagers and possibly even adults if my content grows that much, so I don’t want it to be too immature Q-Q).

✘-Calling me “Mommy” or “Daddy” in a sensual way if you’re a future fan of mine(No….just no. Eww).

My Social Media Platforms(Onlyfans Coming Soon? Jk we’re minors still, you creepy dumb person who I hope is not an adult! Duhh). Check out my side/alternative blogs though once I am able to get ready making them!! Yolo after all ;w;. I love you guys, mwah mwah!!Ù3Ú♡.

1 note · View note

papers4me · 3 years

Text

Fruits Basket, Se03, ep10 (part 1)

“ What to do? & how to do it? the answer & the method are so simple, so simple but difficult as hell. it was hard for me to get them, & that’s exactly why I treasure them/ makes them valuable”. kyo~ This is my favorite quote in all anime.

How many times a domestic abuse victim was told just leave this abusive partner? report them? easy. just make a call. Report your abusive parents? tell someone. easy. Just speak up. It is true. It is easy but difficult as hell. To believe it is your right to fight. No, to believe you deserve to fight. to Live. This abuse is not a punishment you must endure. Hope is not dead. How simple yet so difficult to do that. ugh! my heart!

- Seeing Death vs Facing Death: ( The abuser who was stopped):

Abuse is a form of slow death. An actual intentional murder of an innocent soul. Abusers suck the life out of their victims & kyo’s biological dad is the poster monster for that. His appearance:

thin deathly demeanor, lack of nourishment, excessive drinking, lack of desire get out of the abyss, wide eyes, tiny pupils, manic laughter. shaky body movement. pathetic outlook at things.

heavy breathing, lack of logic & distorted facts, blurry speech, bizarre mentality, toxic behavior, tendency to hurt, injure, both physically & verbally.

inability to grasp reality, desire for inflecting pain on others, finding joy in that as it justifies his entire toxic mentality.

Fear of being hurt like he hurt others & being paranoid since he KNOWS he should receive punishment.

Kyo stood watching this man spit, rage, shake, scream. The man from his past, the authoritative figure in his early tender years, the person who must always be right: a parent. Facing his dad, Kyo’s entire gradual change was fantastic:

Kyo went from feeling utter fear from this man, hatred towards him, grief at the loss of a father & a mother, to force himself to stand his ground & not leave” easy but difficult as hell“ , to talk ” easy but difficult as hell“ , to announce that isnt gonna die ” easy but difficult as hell“ to say I’m loved & I want to to be with someone ” easy but difficult as hell”

to then realize the source of his mom’s misery isnt him after all, but this jerk! & not crumble at this realization ” easy but difficult as hell“ to grief over his mom’s tragic life & still announce again that he’s anit throwing his life away ” easy but difficult as hell“ to still look at his dad with pity rather than immense hate & anger ” easy but difficult as hell“ to remove his hand & leave him behind in the past while he moves forward ” easy but difficult as hell“ to say “ i’ll come visit again, cuz I anit afraid of you anymore, I’m not running, but I’ll try to extend a hand if you wanna do the same one day. It is your choice to be the abuser who must be stopped or the one who is atoned! you can choose, dad! We heard his choice as kyo was leaving, didn’t we? locking himself in an eternal cage that he made for himself. After all, he is the monster in his own story by his own choice.

-Seeing death (1): Kyo watching his mom’s suicide is a traumatic experience especially considering she chose such a graphic way to exist this world. Kyo once said to tohru “ mom went flying”, he now said“ mom threw her life away” very graphic ways to explain her death both literally & figuratively. This alone coupled with his father accusing him, resulted in a 4 year old screaming” I’mma yuki & kill myself, this would make you happy, dad”. This explains kyo’s 2 meetings with yuki as kids“ I hate you” at the sohma estate, the 2nd meeting “ I hate you” at the street. Mimicking the toxic behavior of the dad. Why didn’t kyo mimic kazuma? cuz trauma doesn't work like that. Kids can live safely for time then one traumatic experience shatter their self-worth into an endless cycle of self-hurt, low self worth & anger issues or withdrawal. The writing that set kyo/yuki against each other is perfect.

-Seeing death (2): Kyo watching kyoko’s death hammers all the insecurities of child kyo deep down into teenage kyo. Kyoko too, went flying, blood everywhere. too much pain happening again, crashing hope & killing his fighting spirit over & over. Be with tohru? why? to kill her, too?

-Seeing death (3): Kyo watching tohru’s injured body. Yup. You caused this. not by pushing her or failing to catch her. No. but by hurting her with harsh words. by forcing her away from you.

-Facing death (1): Kyo facing his dad, the symbol of deadly-abuse. To stand & announce to live is huge. -Facing death (2): refuse death: being caged till death, -Facing death (3): To say, I wanna be loved & love someone, life is not just being outside, heck! kyo was outside for 17 years! life is abt being with those who give it meaning! -Facing death (4): To not demand others to die as a punishment. Walking away from his dad without igniting the cycle of revenge & hate. ahhhhhhhhhh~~~ Chef’s kiss!

-Seeing eye to eye: ( I don’t need to be you, but I appreciate you):

Kyo & yuki toxic relationship has been ongoing since their birth. The moment kyo’s dad was dismayed that he got the cat of all zodiac & the moment yuki’s mom was delighted she got the rat of all zodiacs. From that moment it became: look how lucky the rat parents? You shamed me? Look how pitiful that cat? eww! stay away from his filth. The explosive nature of kyo’s tragic fate tainted him with the blood of his mom & the daggers of his father’s hateful words, while the nature of yuki’s sheltered & locked fate tainted him with fear & isolation. They meet & both carry out the feelings of rejection & hate all while envying the other. The toxic nature of their relationship consist of fights & condensing words. Tohru connected both. Through her, they became civil. Even talking abt perverted shigure. Now that she is hurt, they are lost without her. Their lives are empty.

Yuki’s “ kyo has his own pain & reasons” (to not see tohru) is my fave line! even better than all the epic lines after they confess their feelings. cuz this like happened before they connect. it shows that, I see his pain, I get he has his reasons. But whatever issues he have shouldn’t hurt tohru. this is when yuki interferes in kyo’s choices. For tohru. This is also when kyo really allows him to. For tohru. Had tohru nor be part of the fight, kyo wouldn’t even engage in it & yuki wouldn’t initiate it.

-“I wanted to be you!” : Kyo said it first. I loved this so much! Cuz kyo said I hate you first! it is so fulfilling that the truth is now out. From kyo first. Cuz really... that hate was all toxic inheritance from a toxic father & a toxic system.

- “Why do you have to say it firs!” Yuki was mad, cuz he was struggling with it for the longest time. to be kyo. He even mused on how kyo interacted with ppl in school, got himself his own mini kyo. lol. studied how kyo filled tohru’s world just by existing. yuki can't do that for tohru. he looked for someone whom he could do that for! yuki/machi scene at her house paralleled kyo/tohru scene at her room when she was sick (se01, e023) & when they eating the somen together (se02, e02), yuki/machi chalk scene paralleled kyo/tohru scene at the beach where he coaxed tohru to tell her mom’s story (se02, e07). Yuki really was having a hard time finding his true self & accepting it without needing to learn from kyo. It is hard to say “ i admired you” after being rejected by you! so kyo saying it first helped yuki say his after. Also, both boys were hella shocked they admire each other. Like both were deeply shocked! stupid boys! XD

Side Notes:

Kyo’s confrontation with his dad is furuba’s most powerful scene & most well-written one! From the fear of facing him, to talking to him with low voice, to physically stopping him, to the exposed last piece of locked memory abt the mother, to the freedom gained by walking forward! Heck, even how it was weaved psychologically to perfectly mimic children’s self-defense mechanisms & children copying their parents theme. The realistic depiction of abusers both in their most powerfully menacing moment & in their weakest cowardly moment. Top-tier writing! Hands down my fave furuba scene! Can’t ask for better! Can’t even imagine better! genius- writing Takaya-san!

The boys had a necessary fight & confrontation & the yuki’s entire speech was valid & perfect speech. However, as usual, I’m not a fan of how violence is depicted in furuba. I was actually “warned/ ordered” by an anon to not “ sh*t” on the boys fight scene. I don’t know why someone who’d read my reviews would think i’d have anything but love for both boys. I criticize the writing not the characters. Also, furuba fans have always been good to me, I state my opinion frankly & they talk to me! “ talk!”. You don’t have to throw virtual fists over different perspectives on fiction. Talking kindly does magic, also having different opinions is natural & normal for humans.

I love yuki so much, he’s one of my top faves in furuba & I get why the boys would quarrel & throw fists. I get the history between them, the current state of mind, their emotions & mentality & I get it’s fiction & drama that needs its “ OMG” moment. However, I cringe when I see violence used as a bonding moment in fiction in general. That’s just me. I wish the fight was done in a more artistic style without showing that scene where yuki corned kyo & punched him in full view of the screen. (again not hating on yuki nor the fact that they needed to fight). I’m jus saying I didn't need to see a one-sided beat up from a character I love to another one I love. That’s just me again~ feel free to enjoy this moment to its fullest. It’s fiction & I’m not judging anyone at all, nor hating anyone from real life or fiction <3<3<3.

Yuki’s last piece of character development is in my part 2 review! Along with machi. Also, yuki’s Japanese VA was awesome!!

Also, let yuki have deep various facial expressions!!!! ugh! In the fight scene they did yuki so dirty with his hair covering his eyes all the time! then followed by low quality shots of him breathing! Why?! The voice acting sold the entire excellent emotional rage more than the animation! Yuki can look pretty even when mad, heck! screw looking pretty! just give him deep facial expressions to mach his feelings! boy was hella mad like he never was his entire life! always forced to wear a mask or be diplomatic! now he’s screaming his lungs out, you hide his face??? really?? Sigh~ the anime always do this wit yuki, replace facial expressions with hair on eyes or having his eyes without light. I wanna see them expressive eyebrows so bad!!!

Another powerful VA performance was both kyo’s dad VAs! both the Japanese (with his excessive breathing) & the English VA (with his range). They sold the mad abusive character! they gave me chills!

Also, I sound like a broken record, but kyo’s both VAs did phenomenon in the dad’s scene & tohru’s scene. Honestly, I only watch the dub to hear Jerry! I learned his name & would watch the dub for him!

Akito, Arisa, Kureno in part 2 of my review as well.

Shigure/yuki returning home scene is call back to ep1. Ok, everybody loves a call back scene & the full circle thingy. but C’mon! you dont have to copy everything! the walk, the scenery, its purpose, dialogue & all! The anime really took advantage of kyo being missing. XD

Tohru’s dress/top color matches the color of kyo’s old hat (The hat). symbolic of him finding her? As if he did find her when they were children? cool. I love this detail. But i do NOT love this color on tohru at all !! lol. it is so dull on her. The dress style/ design mimics her same dress in se01, ep26 as she was talking to kazuma & kyo fought him. Their first intimate moment after nearly loosing the other. Heck! tohru was even hurt on her hand as well. but the color was a nice pastel yellow. It suited tohru. The hat’s bluish-greenish color matches tohru’s own pajama at home!!!! & kureno’s hospital pajama! T_T... why couldn't the hat be red!!!! a color that both represent kyo & yuki! both were compared to red before~ oh well~~ minor issue~

#Fruits Basket #Anime Only #happy paper #final season #part 1

35 notes · View notes

yourprayer · 6 years

Text

occulous repairo

merry christmas ya filthy animals!!! it is finally time to reveal myself to my it secret santa recipient!!!! this fic is for the lovely @wyttolff (big thanks for helping organize this whole shebang!! i hope u love ur gift dear <3 i sent u anons lmao i wasn’t slick)

occulous repairo, a losers club hp au

pairings: reddie (for now, tbh i might turn this into a full-blown Thing)

word count: 6.1k

warnings: mildly graphic depictions of a broken arm?? General Wizarding Buffoonery

“God- damn- shit-”

“Rich, calm down, jesus christ. You’re not gonna get it if you keep pressuring yourself. Relax.”

“I am fucking relaxed Eds, it’s just not working-”

“It’ll work if you stop clenching your fist, for starters.” Eddie sighed, reaching over and forcing Richie to loosen his grip on his wand. Richie tried not to notice how gentle Eddie’s guidance was, or his perfectly kept nails, or his soft-

He tried not to notice.

“Now, when you say the incantation, let it flow instead of spitting it out. And maybe don’t say fuck so much.” Eddie quirked an eyebrow at him, which took him a second to catch as his gaze lingered on Eddie’s hands.

“Thanks, professor, any other tips you got?” He said defensively. He knew Eddie was just trying to help him, but he couldn’t help his tone. He’d been trying his accio charm for half an hour to no avail, and he was pissed. Charms was his best course, and he’d never struggled with something so much in all his years of schooling. His pride was wounded, and he wasn’t prepared to receive advice.

Eddie blanched, before his expression turned sour. “Fine, be that way. I hope you fail your Runes test.” Eddie grumbled, before casting a perfect Summoning spell on Richie’s Runes book. It sailed so close to Richie’s face he thought it might smack his glasses clean off, but thankfully it only knocked them askew.

“Bitch.” Richie glared at him, reaching up to fix his spectacles. Eddie only responded with a flat glare and a wordless repetition of the charm, causing Richie’s glasses to soar off his face and into Eddie’s waiting hand.

“Hey, give those back!” Richie blinked against the sudden blurriness and wildly reached out for Eddie’s hands. Eddie snorted and held the glasses out of Richie’s reach.

“Not until you stop being an asshole. I’m just trying to help you.”

“I’m sorry, okay, Jesus-”

“Say it like you mean it.”

“I’m sorry, princess-”

“Not in the fucking voice Rich, and don’t call me princess-”

“Look, I’m sorry, seriously, Eds.” Richie’s hands dropped to his lap as he looked dejectedly down at them. “I’m just… really frustrated with myself.”

“I know.” Suddenly his glasses were being placed gingerly across the bridge of his nose. “You’re gonna get it, okay?” Eddie gave him a tender, serious look. “Don’t knock me for helping you.”

“I’m sorry. Thank you for your advice.”

“What, ya gonna braid his hair?” Bev’s voice cut through their reverie, causing Eddie to realize that the hands he’d just used to replace Richie’s glaces were practically tangled in the other boy’s hair. He pulled them back to his lap, his face flushing. Bev laughed at the action.

“You know you’ve got first dibs on these curls, love.” Richie threw over his shoulder at her with a smirk.

“Class!” Their professor rapped his wand on the podium in front of him, shooting a glare at Richie, who was his frequent Problem Student. Most teachers tended to assume that if someone was talking out of turn in class, it was Richie. They tended to be right. “Focus up; we’re shifting to our second spell of the day.”

“Goodie me.” Richie mumbled under his breath, sitting back in his seat with his arms crossed. He was still chuffed about the last spell; he didn’t want another one to muck up.

“I think you’ll find this one quite useful, Mr. Tozier.” His teacher gave him a hard look. “Turn to page twenty-seven. Let’s work on occulous reparo.”

Eddie did his best to hide a laugh as Richie flipped open his book to the page of the glasses-repairing spell. Richie’s ears went red as many of his other classmates began to laugh too, realizing the diss from their teacher. This redness stayed on his ears throughout the duration of the lesson, hiding his face in shame as their professor went through the steps. When they were left to attempt the spell on their own, however, his mood was quick to change.

“Having some trouble there, Eds?” Richie found himself smirking over at a frustrated Eddie, who had failed to fix the crack in the pair of practice readers they had been provided for the twentieth time.

“Shut the fuck up.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t say fuck so much.”

Richie looked at Eddie with his biggest shit eating grin. He also thanked his stars Eddie wasn’t a dementor; otherwise he’d be getting his soul sucked by now.

It’d be worth it for the kiss, though.

Richie pushed the thought away immediately.

“I’m gonna-” Eddie’s face of rage faltered, changing to confusion. “I’m- I’m too flustered to come up with a threat right now, but just know you’re gonna regret that comment later.”

“I’m quakin’ in my boots!”

“Beep beep.” Eddie huffed, turning back to his spectacles. Richie watched him attempt the spell a few times before Eddie’s cheeks began to tinge pink. “Are you staring for a reason, trashmouth?”

Richie faltered. “Uh- no. No, nothing.” He pushed his curls back nervously, before turning to his practice glasses and performing the spell perfectly on the first try, as per his usual. He sighed, feeling relief that his mojo was back. Eddie eyed his glasses with jealousy before dejectedly attempting the spell one more time.

“Here-” Richie said after a pause, wrapping his hands around Eddie’s wand hand. “Try gripping it like this.” He helped Eddie adjust his hold on the wand. “And uh… try flicking with a little bit more force.” Richie chanced a glance at the smaller boy’s face; he was looking at their tangled hands with his mouth slightly agape, his expression strange. Richie swallowed and let go with hesitation.

He also tried not to notice the snickers of Bill and Bev, the next table over.

Well, he tried to.

________________________________________________________________

“Jesus Billiam, and you shit on me for overeating.”

“Sh-shut up Tozier. I e-e-eat a lot at m-meals, sure, b-but you eat like a c-cow. All d-d-damn day.”

“Touche.” Richie shrugged, taking a massive bite out of his sandwich as he reached across Bev’s plate for another.

“You know you could just ask me to pass you one.” She griped.

“It’s my only stretch for the day, just let me have it.” Richie said around a mouthful of food.

“Sexy.” Bev scrunched her nose and gave him a disgusted look. He smiled wide, revealing bread-and-meat filled teeth. She lightly punched his shoulder. “Ugh, that’s fucking nasty. You know that may work on Eddie but it’s not gonna charm me.”

Richie furrowed his brow, swallowing his food. “Excuse me?”

“Excuse you! I saw you two in Charms. The tension was practically rolling off of you guys in waves.”

“What! There was no- there wasn’t tension, Bev, we were just-”

“Just doing what you always do, tragically pining over each other with no hope of requisition.” Bev sighed dramatically. “It’s saddening, really.”

Richie glared at her through squinted eyes and coke-bottle glasses. “I do not pine.”

“Yes you do.” Bill said nonchalantly through a mouthful of chicken.

Richie huffed, turning back to his plate. “I do not pine!” His following dramatic gesture was cut short by a flying piece of treacle, which hit him squarely in the forehead. He flinched, shocked by the contact, then glanced around the Great Hall to see where the projectile originated from. Near the end of their table, a certain Mr. Bowers and his cronies were sniggering. Richie went red and turned back to his friends.

“Shit Rich, you okay?” Bev asked in a concerned tone as Richie pulled off his glasses to inspect them for debris.

“‘M fine.” He griped. “It’s assholes like Bowers that give our house such a bad name. I don’t want people to think of me in the same class as that.” He gestured towards Bowers, who was currently trying (and hilariously failing) to change his cider into rum.

“T-technically you’re not.” Bill said. “He is a c-couple classes ab-bove us.”

Richie gave him a flat look. “He’s still a Slytherin.”

“You’re twice the Slytherin he’ll ever be.” Bev said with a wink.

Bill and Richie both smiled at her. “You’re darn right I am.” Richie beamed, hitching up his robes on his shoulders.

That time Richie didn’t notice Eddie’s small face, peeking over Mike’s shoulder across the way at the Hufflepuff table, a small blush on his cheeks as he watched Richie preen.

Richie didn’t notice, but Eddie did.

________________________________________________________________

“C’mon Eddie, I thought you’d done this before.” Ben was still laughing, though on his behalf he was making at least some semblance of an attempt at disguising it. Richie did nothing to hide his guffaws as he watched Eddie try to right himself.

“Yeah, once! That doesn’t mean I’m a fucking pro at it!”

“Language, Mr. Kaspbrak. One point from Hufflepuff.” Their professor uttered boredly as she passed them, on her way to assist another student.

“Sorry Professor.” Eddie grumbled from his current position, which happened to be hanging completely upside down from a broom that was floating about six feet off the ground. The only thing keeping him from meeting it was his death grip with all of his limbs around the handle.

“You look like a koala!” Richie cried through his laughter, complete with actual tears.

“A very unhappy one.” Ben added lightly, sending Richie into another peal of laughter that caused him to nearly fall over.

“THIS ISN’T FUNNY!” Eddie screeched down at them, desperately making an attempt to flip over to the topside of his broom.

“Would you like some help?” Ben asked cautiously.

“No, Benjamin, I’m thoroughly enjoying myself.” Eddie snapped, carefully shimmying with his feet.

“Oh my God, where’s Bill, I’ve gotta get a picture of this-” Richie finally managed when he regained control of his laughter.

“YOU WILL NOT.” Eddie called down, taking a second too long to glare down at Richie. His loss of focus caused a loss of footing, and before he knew it he was dangling from the end of his broom, his grip reduced to his bare hands around where the base met the bristles. He let out a shriek as he fumbled; he was still a good couple of feet from the ground.

And rising.

“Ben- Ben! BEN IT’S GOING UP WHAT DO I DO-”

“Let go of it, Eddie!” Ben watched in shock as Eddie’s broom steadily began to climb. Richie instantly ceased his giggling, his expression turning serious.

“WHY IS IT DOING THIS BEN HELP-”

“Eddie you have to let go! It won’t stop until you stop touching it!” Ben called up to him, looking around for their professor.

“I can’t! I can’t, I’m too high!”

“Eddie just let go, I’ll catch you!” Richie yelled, moving to stand underneath the floating boy.

“I can’t! I could crush you!” He looked pleadingly up at the broom, but for all he was concerned, it was on a path of its own, its mind unknowable to him. He could almost feel the rate of his ascent increasing along with his rapid heartbeat.

Mike came jogging across the pitch, their professor in tow.

“Dear God, what’s going on with him?” Mike asked incredulously, craning his neck to squint up at Eddie against the glaring sun.

“His broom’s being fussy.” Ben sighed. “He won’t let go.”

“That’s the only way you’re gonna get down!” Mike yelled up to the frightened boy.

“That’s what I told him.” Ben said.

“Eds, c’mon, I said I’d catch you!” Richie yelled again, trying to persuade him with a smile. He was only met with a squeak as the broom above them pitched wildly, causing Eddie to loosen his grip. He righted himself, but his hold was only tenuous.

“Eddie, come on, you have to let go!” Mike pressed, pulling his yellow striped scarf and rolling up his sleeves. He moved to stand next to Richie.

“I CAN’T!”

“Rich and I will catch you, if you don’t let go now it’s gonna pitch you!”

“I’M TOO HIGH UP!”

“Well it’s not gonna come back down when you’re worked up like that!” Ben huffed, growing frustrated with Eddie’s stubbornness. Bill and Bev finally made their way to the front of the small crowd of students that had gathered to spectate, their faces painted with worry.

“Mr. Kaspbrak, you need to listen to Mr. Hanlon. It’s the only way we’re going to get you down.” Their professor said calmly from her place next to Ben. “Mr. Hanscom, will you go get the nurse’s team, please. I suspect he’ll have a rough fall from this height.” She said quietly to Ben. He nodded and pushed through the crowd, headed back towards the castle.

“Eddie, please, come down.” Richie pleaded, his fear growing more and more palpable. Richie had already hit a good five-eleven in height, and by his measurement he thought it likely he could fit another one of himself between him and Eddie. The turf on the pitch was meant to soften the blow from a fall, and many a student had been pitched off of brooms and onto the grass from greater heights before. But Eddie had never been more than Richie’s height off of the ground before, and this was only because of all the times the trashmouth himself had hoisted Eddie over his shoulder for a joke. It was no secret to anyone that Eddie was fragile, either; the boy was on more magical medicine than Richie’d ever heard of, and spent at least a quarter of his time in the hospital wing for various injuries over their five years at Hogwarts so far. This fall was shaping up to be a rough one indeed, and growing prospectively worse by the second.

Eddie’s wild eyes caught Richie’s as he looked down in panic. Richie responded with raised eyebrows and a nod, gently encouraging Eddie down. Eddie’s eyes then caught Mike’s, who’s arms were out and ready to catch Eddie on his way down. Richie mimicked his position, his feet shoulder-width apart. They both looked to Eddie again, but instead of his agreement of readiness, they were met with fearful eyes that soon disappeared into the blur of a shaking head.

“No! No, I can’t do it!” Eddie was doing a fairly good job of hiding it, but Richie could tell the small boy was damn near close to tears as he clung desperately to the end of the broomstick.

“Yes, you can, Ed-”

Mike’s words were lost as the broom gave another violent jerk, and Eddie was yanked dangerously to the left. The movement caught him off guard, and his threadbare grip was rendered moot at the wood slipped from beneath his hands. Richie saw a wild flailing of limbs eclipse the sun in his gaze, and heard a cry of fear the likes of which he’d never heard from his closest friend.

And then Eddie was falling.

To him, it wasn’t like he’d heard described from Ben about his Quidditch games or how he’d seen it in the movies. There was no slow-motion rendering, no recollection of his life in a succinct flash, no endless churning through open air. Maybe it was because the fall wasn’t from nearly as high as Ben had come down from before, or because he was so unused to the feeling, but instead of a weightless, floating, gradual fall, it happened and was over faster than anything he’d ever experience. He was in the air, and then he wasn’t. Like that. Like lightning.

For Richie, however, there was slow-motion. Eddie’s broom had positioned him directly above Richie’s head, instead of neatly poised above he and Mike’s waiting arms. Neither of them had enough time to adjust their positions in reality, but to Richie it seemed as though he’d had time enough to move out of the way. He watched, as if through lens, as his best friend plummeted through the air, expression aghast and limbs askew, directly towards his face.

Crunch.

There was an audible gasp from the spectating students.

“Oh fuck…”

A groan from Eddie.

“I second that.”

Richie’s gruff reply.

“Guys?”

Then Mike was above them, their professor and Bill, even Beverly’s curl-framed face all swimming through Richie’s vision. After a couple of blinks they came sharper into focus; after a couple more it became apparent that his glasses had an exceptionally gnarly fracture in them.

“Did I catch him?” Richie mumbled up at them through a crooked smile. He felt a hot, wet splotch forming on his upper lip.

“Yeah, with your f-face.”

“Enough, Mr. Denbrough, make space.” Bill’s and Beverly’s faces disappeared. “Mr. Kaspbrak, can you hear me?”

Something stirred on top of Richie’s chest. He looked down the best he could, his head not wanting to bear much weight.

His heart couldn’t really bear the sight of it, either.

A quick tally told him all limbs were accounted for; four for him, four for Eddie, all easily visible. His were thankfully laid out the way they were supposed to be. He had been knocked flat, but thankfully nothing had folded or crumpled. His ass hurt from where it hit the ground, and he was fairly certain the wetness on his face was from a bloody nose. By his worst estimate he had a mild concussion, at his best a few bruises. Definitively he was okay. But the weight on top of him was another story.

Eddie had all four of his limbs alright, but as Richie realized with growing horror, one of them was very nearly facing the wrong way.

Eddie slowly raised his head, his eyes meeting Richie’s over Eddie’s twisted and mangled arm between them. His gaze quickly left the other boys and settled on what hardly resembled his right arm. Richie watched as the color drained instantly from his face. He’d never seen Eddie look so upset before.

“Mr. Kaspbrak-” Their teacher repeated, before Eddie let out a moan.

“Oh- oh god…” He wretched, making Richie genuinely worried the smaller boy would throw up on him.

Mike’s hands were suddenly on Eddie’s shoulders, guiding him up enough to get Richie out from underneath him. They got Eddie back into a sitting position, and Richie able to kneel in front of him.

“Mr. Hanlon, please escort Mr. Kaspbrak to the infirmary. Mr Hanscom should intercept you on the way with aid. Mr. Denbrough, please accompany Mr. Tozier.”

“I don’t need attention, I’m okay.” Richie said quickly, eyes not leaving Eddie’s face. He could already see a bruise forming high on Eddie’s cheekbone. His face must have been what collided with Richie’s nose. “I’ll help take Eddie up.”

“Alright, alright, disperse then.” The professor said in a huff to the surrounding crowd of students. Most of them departed, but Bill and Bev stayed on, observing worriedly. They had to be dismissed again at the threat of house point deduction, which even then barely worked. All that got them to leave was a non-verbal agreement between the four of them that Eddie would be okay in the hands of Mike and Richie.

“C’mon daredevil, lets go get you cleaned up.” Richie muttered quietly in Eddie’s ear as he and Mike hoisted Eddie up from the ground.

“Oh- oh god I’m gonna hurl.” Eddie said feebly, his steps uneven and wobbly.

“Be sick to the left, then, can’t have you staining my fresh laundry now.” He joked, though it sounded nervous even to his own ears. He felt nearly as shaky as the smaller boy, his thoughts swimming with worry. He was concerned Eddie could pass out before they got him up to the infirmary.

“You got him, Rich?” Mike said calmly.

“Yeah.” Richie said, slinging Eddie’s unbroken arm over his shoulder.

“I’m gonna run ahead and see if they’ve got a stretcher.”

“Good on, mate.” Richie nodded at him as he turned and sprinted in the direction of the school. “Okay, Eds, just you and me now. I need you to do your best to stay upright, okay? Don’t worry about going too fast or anything, just stayin’ afloat, okay?”

“M sorry…” Came Eddie’s slurred response. His head was hanging, and Richie could feel his skin growing clammy from the hand he had clasped in his. The smaller boy was too white, and too wobbly.

“Nothing to be sorry for Spaghetti.” He had to bend over quite a bit to accommodate their height difference, and the awkward position was starting to belabor him. “Not your fault you got tossed around by a stick.”

“Shoulda.. Tried harder…”

“Shoulda let go sooner is what you shoulda. You really scared me there, love.”

Both of them pretended not to notice the pet name.

They did.

“Sorry.”

“Don’t ‘sorry’. Just don’t do it again.”

Part of Richie hoped Eddie didn’t notice the gentle way he was stroking his thumb across the hand he had in his, his small attempt at comforting the immense pain he knew the other boy must be in. His small attempt at comforting himself that Eddie would be okay.

The other part of Richie really, really hoped he did.

_______________________________________________________________

“I mean Christ Staniel, it was practically backwards.” Richie whispered hurriedly, pushing his newly fractured glasses up the bridge of his nose for the umpteenth time. He’d broken into quite a sweat hauling Eddie across the grounds, and his glasses now refused to stay on a face slick with sweat.

“I’m only sad I missed it.” Stan deadpanned, his gaze never leaving his parchment. “I’ve always wanted to see Eddie hit you in the face.”

“With his whole body?” Richie whisper-yelled incredulously. Their Runes professor shot them a dirty look over his shoulder before continuing. Stan waited for the teacher to turn away before speaking again.

“Of course not.” Stan gave Richie The Look; the one that told him Stan was switching out of sarcasm. “They said he’ll be okay, right?”

“Yeah, the nurse already has him set.”

“Fuck, you watched that?”

“They had me do it. Eddie was screaming at everyone; he didn’t want them to touch him at all.”

“Jesus.” Stan breathed, chancing another glance at the professor. They remained undetected. “I’m just glad you’re both okay...ish. You could’ve been a lot worse off.”

“Me too.” Richie glanced guiltily down at his arms. His right was slightly bruised and sore from where Eddie’s weight had landed on it, and he new his nose was quite the sight. “I’m just so fucking pissed he got hurt instead of me.”

Stan gave him a knowing look.

“Finally.”

Richie looked up at him, eyebrows knitted.

“Come again for big fudge?”

Stan cocked an eyebrow. “Just… finally.”

“Mr. Uris!” Their teacher suddenly interrupted, causing the two of them to jump slightly. “Something to share with the class?”

“No, sir.” Stan mumbled.

“Then can you at least share with me what…” He paused as he drew a series of symbols on the board. “...This means?”

Stan took a moment to squint at the figures. He could only state with confidence about half.

“I cannot, sir.”

“Never thought I’d see the day when my star student couldn’t answer a simple question. Five points from Ravenclaw. You and mister Tozier here better focus up or I might just deduct from Slytherin as well.”

Richie and Stan gave him twin death glares as he turned back to the board.

________________________________________________________________

“Finally what?”

Stanley nearly jumped out of his skin. “Jesus FUCK, Richie.”

“Finally what?”

“Were you fucking hiding behind that suit of armor waiting for me?”

“Only for like an hour, anyways finally what?”

“You’re hyper-fixating again.” Stan muttered bitterly as he straightened his tie (and attempted to quell his fluttering heart rate).

“ADHD, sue me. Finally what?”

“Christ Rich, let it go.” Stan hitched his book bag strap further up his shoulder, checking his special wand pocket to ensure the instrument was still safely tucked in after his scare.

“Well tell me what the fuck you meant then!” Richie flapped his arms frustratedly, his loosely worn green striped tie following suit.

“I have to meet Bill for our study session-”

“You’re not going anywhere, Stan-The-Man,” Richie pulled his wand from his back pocket (where he foolishly kept it, in Stan’s opinion) and dramatically jumped into a dueling stance. “Before goin’ through me.”

“I’m not fighting you over it, asshole-”

“Then tell meeeeeee.” Richie whined, dropping his shoulders and hands flamboyantly. A group of second year girls scurrying past watched him in confusion.

“You’re not gonna like it.” Stan snorted, watching as Richie gestured crudely at the girls.

“Try me.” Richie folded his arms.

Stan mirrored his position.

“I only meant your little pity party there in Runes was an admission. One I’ve been waiting on. Hence, finally.”

Richie drew his eyebrows together in confusion. “Admission of what? That I felt bad? That’s no secret, wouldn’t you-”

Stan rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah. This is exactly what I’m talking about.”

“I’m so confused.”

“Of course you are. You haven’t had pre-dinner yet.”

“Which I’m skipping right now to interrogate you, thank you very much.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry my minding of my own business between classes has disrupted your thievery of the kitchens.”

“Okay first of all, it’s not thievery if the house elves have given up on fighting me over it. Secondly, what the fuck are you talking about.”

Richie was using his pleading voice, the one that got Stan every time.

They locked eyes in a stare down.

Stan lost.

“You’re in love with Eddie.”

“I am?”

Stan blanched. “Yes, Richie.”

“And why is this news to me? Shouldn’t this be something I’m aware of-?” Richie trailed off.

“Yeah, it fucking should.” Stan put his face in his hand. “Look, Richie, seriously, you need to take some time to address your feelings. What you said in class? About feeling guilty? That was some cheesy shit. I’m talking grade-a Debbie Macomber novel. Maybe you should sit with that for a bit.”

Richie gave him a blank look.

“You think I have feelings for Eddie.”

“I know you do.”

“Okay, and how do I not know this?”

“Because you’re blind as a bat.”

Richie crossed his eyes to look at the break in his thick lenses. “Touche.” He looked back at Stan, and paused.

“I don’t have feelings for Eddie.”

“Really? Prove it.”

“Prove it? How?!”

“Get through one whole day without telling me how cute his hair is.”

“Well that’s impossible Staniel, you know I love his-”

Richie suddenly dropped the end of his sentence.

“Fuck.”

Stan cocked an eyebrow.

“I have feelings for Eddie.”

Stan nodded, much like a babysitter to a three year old who’d finally gotten the hint.

“Fuck.”

________________________________________________________________

“Mr. Kaspbrak, you have a visitor.” Eddie heard the nurse say quietly through the drapes thrown round his hospital bed.

“I’m not-” He croaked, before being cut off.

“Eds, it’s me.”

The curtains slowly pulled back to reveal a pale and drawn looking Eddie, his right arm currently obscured from view.

“Hi, Rich.”

He nodded at the nurse, who turned and left. Eddie stepped back to let Richie into the enclosed space, swinging the curtains closed behind them. Eddie sat gingerly on the bed, cradling his arm close to his chest. It was bound in bandages and hung in a white sling, which had been admonished with a scrawling rendition of the word “loser” in all capital letters.

Richie had spent the last god-knows-how-many minutes on his way to the hospital wing (which, despite his multitude of trips to meet Eddie there, he still never seemed to find in a reasonable amount of time) mulling over in his head what the fuck he should say. He’d start by voicing his concern, follow it up with a joke that will do nothing to dispel either of their discomfort, maybe throw in a couple of anecdotes about the rest of his classes with Stan for extra stalling time, but then inevitably reach the point where he’d spill his guts because Lord (and every one of his friends, for that matter) knew he couldn’t keep a thought in once he’d had it, and say the damned words that could very well cost him one of his closest friends. Or perhaps bring them much, much closer, a hopeful voice had quietly persisted in his head, though he tried not to give it much notice.

He did.

He also very, very much noticed the damn sling.

“The fuck is that?” He asked, perplexed, drawing his brows together as he gestured at the word.

Eddie flushed, looking down at his feet. “Fucking Greta is the nurses aid today. She was supposed to just change my bandages and leave, but… We started talking and she asked if she could sign it and I said yes and... “ Eddie took a breath, exhaling deeply. “It’s charmed on there, I’ve spent the last hour trying to get it off.”

“That fucking bitch…” Richie muttered, sitting down next to Eddie.

“It’s okay.” Eddie looked smaller than Richie had seen in a long time. “It’s what I am.”

“Darn right you are!” Richie said indignantly, clapping Eddie gently on the back. “King of the losers.”

“That’s actually Bill, but thanks.” Eddie gave a small laugh, relaxing into Richie’s touch. He left his hand on Eddie’s back.

“Whatever. Big Bill can step down for a bit. You deserve the crown for getting through today.” Richie smiled, lightly beginning to massage the smaller boy’s spine.

“It certainly has been one, hasn’t it.”

The two spent a moment sat in comfortable silence, Richie slowly working out a knot in the center of Eddie’s back. The comfort soon turned charged however, as both boys sucked in a breath to speak.

“Eds-”

“Rich- Oh, sorry, you go first.”

“No, no, you go.” Richie shook his head fervently, his heart rate jumping.

“I just- I’m sorry. I’m really embarrassed. I should have listened when you guys told me to let go. I made us all look like dumbasses, me falling on you like that.” Richie quirked an eyebrow, nearly letting out a laugh. “I’m also sorry for falling on you.”

Richie did laugh at that. “And I’m sorry for not scooting to the left. The impact really hurt my ass, I’ll have you know.”

Eddie snorted. “Oh, you poor thing.”

“Doc says I can’t sit for a week.”

“You’re sitting right now, asshole.”

“Yeah, and it’s hurting my asshole, so maybe think about that before you judge me.”

Eddie gave a real laugh then, his face crinkling up happily, his freckles stretched across his nose in a smattering of stardust.

Richie fucking noticed.

“Eddie.”

Eddie looked up at Richie, surprised by the serious tone in his voice.

“Yeah..?”

“I- I think I like you.”

Eddie gave him a flat look. “Well, I would sure hope you do. We’ve only been friends for years.”

“No, Eds, I- like you. As in- I’d like to kiss you.”

Eddie’s face froze. “Oh.” His brain caught up with the moment. “Oh.”

“Can I?” Richie’s voice was barely a whisper. “Kiss you, I mean.”

Eddie just stared blankly at him, all conscious thought flying right out of his mind.

“Richie-”

“Shit.” Suddenly Richie’s hands were scraping over his face. “That was way too forward, fuck, I’m sorry-”

“No, no Richie, you’re fine.” Eddie laughed nervously. “I just.. Wasn’t prepared for that is all.”

Richie’s face burned behind his hands.

“I would like that.”

Richie peeked through new cracks between his fingers.

“You would?”

Eddie smiled and nodded sheepishly.

“Yeah. Maybe.”

Richie dropped his hands in awe, leaning towards his friend.

“I just-” Richie nearly groaned in frustration as he was stopped short. “..don’t see how you would wanna kiss a loser.” Eddie gestured at the broken arm tucked between them. If Richie was suddenly, magically doing everything Eddie wanted, he might as well charm him into a little removal spell.

What could he say? He knew how to play Richie like a fiddle.

Contrary to Eddie’s, however, Richie was struck with his own idea.

Whipping his wand out of his back pocket, he sat cross-legged on the bed facing Eddie, his concentration face on. Eddie raised a brow but followed suit, mirroring his position.

“You still keep your wand in your back pocket?” Eddie gave him a disgusted look. “That’s so fucking dangerous, Richie-”

“Shut up.” Richie mumbled, beginning to mutter an incantation under his breath.

“The fuck are you-”

“Shut up.” He resumed his spell, concentrating sharply as he drew a concise “v” through the air.

“Rich-”

“There.” Richie straightened up, tucking his wand back into the pocket, warning (as usual) unheeded. He smiled at his work, satisfied.

“What’d you-” Eddie’s words left him as he looked at the sling. Shining brightly over the “s” was a red letter “v”, transforming the insult into a title (he was certainly not over-proud to wear, no sir) on his arm, a very unexpected response.

“That better?” Richie was smiling at him, his usual, every day Richie smile, the one he had when he beat Mike at chess or when his Christmas gift to Bev went over well, or when he got a higher grade than Stan in a Runes essay. It was pride, for sure, but on Richie it was never cocky or obnoxious (though they all loved to tease him as though it was). It was always a smile of accomplishment, from a boy told frequently by the world that he was incapable. It was a smile of achievement, victory; it was infectious. It was one of Eddie’s favorite things about Richie.

His Richie, who he’d always known, always been aware of loving.

Eddie surged forward unexpectedly, sealing their lips in a clumsy kiss, one that seemed to sing through the air on the sigh of Stan’s finally.

“Better.” Eddie mumbled as they shakily pulled apart, both breathless and dizzy. It took all of two milliseconds before Richie was cupping Eddie’s face in his hands, kissing with a power he didn’t know he had. Eddie did his best to reciprocate, tangling his left hand in Richie’s curls (another finally drifting through the cosmos) with his limp right arm still tucked between them. Their knees knocked together awkwardly, and the leaning over was putting painful pressure on Richie’s ribs (he realized dimly that they might not be in the best shape after the fall), but the kiss was soft and meaningful and right.

Through the haze, Eddie noticed one more thing.

“Rich-” He pulled out of their kiss, nose hovering just in front of the others. “Your glasses are still broken, the glass is scratching my face.” He giggled a bit, Richie pulling a face at being interrupted.

“Fuck, I don’t care-” He went to throw them off, pulling Eddie closer again.

“Let me fix them.” He laughed, grabbing them away from Richie and setting them on his leg. He leaned around to grab his wand from the bedside table.

Richie watched him with a raised eyebrow, remembering Eddie’s many failed attempts, and dreading just how long this would take.

Eddie balanced the glasses before taking his wand into his non-dominant hand (a recipe for disaster; Richie braced himself) and swished-

“Occulous repairo.”

A quiet woosh surrounded the glass as the fragments popped back into place and seamlessly wove back together. Both watched in awe as the whole set repaired itself.

“Wow, Eds.” Richie whispered in quiet reverence as Eddie replaced his wand on the table, before turning around and attempting to deposit Richie’s glasses back on his face one-handedly.

“Whoa whoa whoa, let me help you with that, you already fucked up my ass, I don’t want you to do the same to my eye.” Richie quipped as he put the specs on himself.

Eddie half-heartedly rolled his eyes. “I spent all day learning that spell for you, and this is the thanks I get.”

Richie got that devilish twinkle in his eye.

“Oh I’ll give you a good thanks.” He smirked before scooping Eddie up into his arms, kissing wildly all over the other boys face. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!” He exclaimed between Eddie’s laughs.

“You’re welcome, Rich.” Eddie managed through his giggles, as Richie’s kisses slowed. They shared a deep look before kissing again.

They stayed that way, laughing and kissing and joking and being, and all afternoon Eddie couldn't stop thinking about the way Richie looked at him after he successfully completed the spell; that same, wonderful, proud-of-you smile that he’d always wanted to be on the receiving end of.

He hadn’t noticed it all those times before, but thinking back on it as he did now, he realized just how many times he had.

He hadn’t noticed, not before, but this time, he finally did.

#i hope u love this eeeeeee #im snervous #merry christmas love!!!#prior.txt #prior.fic #it #reddie

159 notes · View notes

mothergamerwriter · 5 years

Text

Wicked Saints (Something Dark and Holy #1) by Emily A. Duncan | Blog Tour Review & Excerpt

Hello bookland! Welcome to Mother/Gamer/Writer for the Wicked Saints Blog Tour. For today’s tour stop, please enjoy my review of this magically delicious and bloody tale, an excerpt from the novel, and an awesome pronunciation guide!

I received this book for free from the mentioned source in exchange for an honest review. This does not affect my opinion of the book nor the content of my review.

Wicked Saints by Emily A. Duncan Series: Something Dark and Holy #1 Published by: Wednesday Books on April 2nd 2019 Genres: Fantasy, Magic, YA, Romance Pages: 400 Format: ARC Source: ARC From Publisher, Blog Tour View on: Goodreads Grab it: Amazon Review Score:

About the Book:

When Nadya prays to the gods, they listen, and magic flows through her veins. For nearly a century the Kalyazi have been locked in a deadly holy war with Tranavian heretics, and her power is the only thing that is a match for the enemy’s blood magic. But when the Travanian High Prince, and his army invade the monastery she is hiding in, instead of saving her people, Nadya is forced to flee the only home she’s ever known, leaving it in flames behind her, and vengeance in her heart.

As night falls, she chooses to defy her gods and forge a dangerous alliance with a pair of refugees and their Tranavian blood mage leader, a beautiful, broken boy who deserted his homeland after witnessing his blood cult commit unthinkable monstrosities. The plan? Assassinate the king and stop the war.

But when they discover a nefarious conspiracy that goes beyond their two countries, everything Nadya believes is thrown into question, including her budding feelings for her new partner. Someone has been harvesting blood mages for a dark purpose, experimenting with combining Tranavian blood magic with the Kalyazi’s divine one. In order to save her people, Nadya must now decide whether to trust the High Prince – her country’s enemy – or the beautiful boy with powers that may ignite something far worse than the war they’re trying to end.

“You could be exactly what these countries need to stop their fighting,” he said. He dropped his hand and she was colder for its absence. “Or you could rip them apart at the seams.”

Magical, dark, and wicked, Wicked Saints is a courageous novel set in a Russian inspired land where nothing is as it seems.

Nadya is a cleric, raised in the old ways and able to communicate with not only one god, but all gods. Her magic is deadly powerful and just as difficult to control as the gods she speaks with through her prayer beads who guide and protect the world. Within the first few pages, we are launched into the brutal attack on the monastery where Nadya was raised. Her people are dying at the hands of Crown Prince Serefin, a vicious blood mage and war general sent to capture her and her power. Nadya along with Anna, an ordained priestess, flees the chaos only to run into a group of rebels who have secrets of their own. Among them, Nadya finds their leader Malachiasz is also a blood mage who defected from his group of Vultures, sinister monsters who destroy everything in their path. After their meeting, it becomes a wicked game life or death and maybe love.

Wicked Saints was easy to devour. Honestly, I was seventy percent through the book before I realized I had become immersed in the tale. Emily A. Duncan charms readers with her lush imagination. Her descriptions of snow and ice and stone make it easy for one to lose themselves in Nadya’s world. The religious war at the helm of it all inspires readers to question right and wrong, what they are taught versus what is and what can be. Personally, I loved the combination of religion and religion based magic. It made what happened to Nadya all the more real and personal. With such a complex magical system, Duncan does a great job of blurring the gray area between the two. Is blood magic all bad? Is using the god’s gifts all good? You will have to read Wicked Saints to find out!

Overall, I recommend it for fans of diverse characters, those that love awe-inspiring worlds, and those that crave something a little dark and bloody in their reading pile.

My Rating

4 N A D E Z H D A L A P T E V A

Horz stole the stars and the heavens out from underneath Myesta’s control, and for that she has never forgiven him. For where can the moons rest if not the heavens?

—Codex of the Divine, 5:26

“It’s certainly not my fault you chose a child who sleeps so deeply. If she dies it will very much be your fault, not mine.”

Startled by bickering gods was not Nadya’s preferred method of being woken up. She rolled to her feet in the dark, moving automatically. It took her eyes a few seconds to catch up with the rest of her body.

Shut up!

It wasn’t wise to tell the gods to shut up, but it was too late now. A feeling of amused disdain flowed through her, but neither of the gods spoke again. She realized it was Horz, the god of the heavens and the stars, who had woken her. He had a tendency to be obnoxious but generally left Nadya alone, as a rule.

Usually only a single god communed with their chosen cleric. There once had been a cleric named Kseniya Mirokhina who was gifted with unnatural marksmanship by Devonya, the goddess of the hunt. And Veceslav had chosen a cleric of his own, long ago, but their name was lost to history, and he re- fused to talk about them. The recorded histories never spoke of clerics who could hear more than one god. That Nadya communed with the entire pantheon was a rarity the priests who trained her could not explain.

There was a chance older, more primordial gods existed, ones that had long since given up watch of the world and left it in the care of the others. But no one knew for sure. Of the twenty known gods, however, carvings and paintings depicted their human forms, though no one knew what they actually looked like. No cleric throughout history had ever looked upon the faces of the gods. No saint, nor priest.

Each had their own power and magic they could bestow upon Nadya, and while some were forthcoming, others were not. She had never spoken to the goddess of the moons, Myesta. She wasn’t even sure what manner of power the goddess would give, if she so chose.

And though she could commune with many gods, it was impossible to forget just who had chosen her for this fate: Marzenya, the goddess of death and magic, who expected complete dedication.

Indistinct voices murmured in the dark. She and Anna had found a secluded place within a copse of thick pine trees to set up their tent, but it no longer felt safe. Nadya slid a voryen from underneath her bedroll and nudged Anna awake.

She moved to the mouth of the tent, grasping at her beads, a prayer already forming on her lips, smoky symbols trailing from her mouth. She could see the blurry impressions of figures in the darkness, far off in the distance. It was hard to judge the number, two? Five? Ten? Her heart sped at the possibility that a company of Tranavians were already on her trail.

Anna drew up beside her. Nadya’s grip on her voryen tightened, but she kept still. If they hadn’t seen their tent yet, she could keep them from noticing it entirely.

But Anna’s hand clasped her forearm.

“Wait,” she whispered, her breath frosting out before her in the cold. She pointed to a dark spot just off to the side of the group.

Nadya pressed her thumb against Bozidarka’s bead and her eyesight sharpened until she could see as clearly as if it were day. It took effort to shove aside the immediate, paralyzing fear as her suspicions were confirmed and Tranavian uniforms be- came clear. It wasn’t a full company. In fact, they looked rather ragged. Perhaps they had split off and lost their way.

More interesting, though, was the boy with a crossbow silently aiming into the heart of the group.

“We can get away before they notice,” Anna said.

Nadya almost agreed, almost slipped her voryen back into its sheath, but just then, the boy fired and the trees erupted into chaos. Nadya wasn’t willing to use an innocent’s life as a distraction for her own cowardice. Not again.

Even as Anna protested, Nadya let a prayer form fully in her mind, hand clutching at Horz’s bead on her necklace and its constellation of stars. Symbols fell from her lips like glowing glimmers of smoke and every star in the sky winked out.

Well, that was more extreme than I intended, Nadya thought with a wince. I should’ve known better than to ask Horz for any- thing.

She could hear cursing as the world plunged into darkness.

Anna sighed in exasperation beside her.

“Just stay back,” she hissed as she moved confidently through the dark.

“Nadya . . .” Anna’s groan was soft.

It took more focus to send a third prayer to Bozetjeh. It was hard to catch Bozetjeh on a good day; the god of speed was notoriously slow to answer prayers. But she managed to snag his attention and received a spell allowing her to move as fast as the vicious Kalyazin wind.

Her initial count had been wrong; there were six Tranavians now scattering into the forest. The boy dropped his crossbow with a bewildered look up into the sky, startling when Nadya touched his shoulder.

There was no way he could see in this darkness, but she could. When he whirled, a curved sword in his hand, Nadya sidestepped. His swing went wide and she shoved him in the direction of a fleeing Tranavian, anticipating their collision.

“Find the rest,” Marzenya hissed. “Kill them all.” Complete and total dedication.

She caught up to one of the figures, stabbing her voryen into his skull just underneath his ear.

Not so difficult this time, she thought. But the knowledge was a distant thing.

Blood sprayed, splattering a second Tranavian, who cried out in alarm. Before the second man could figure out what had happened to his companion, she lashed out her heel, catching him squarely on the jaw and knocking him off his feet. She slit his throat.

Three more. They couldn’t have moved far. Nadya took up Bozidarka’s bead again. The goddess of vision revealed where the last Tranavians were located. The boy with the sword had managed to kill two in the dark. Nadya couldn’t actually see the last one, just felt him nearby, very much alive.

Something slammed into Nadya’s back and suddenly the chilling bite of a blade was pressed against her throat. The boy appeared in front of her, his crossbow back in his hands, thank- fully not pointed at Nadya. It was clear he could only barely see her. He wasn’t Kalyazi, but Akolan.

A fair number of Akolans had taken advantage of the war between their neighbors, hiring out their swords for profit on both sides. They were known for favoring Tranavia simply because of the warmer climate. It was rare to find a creature of the desert willingly stumbling through Kalyazin’s snow.

He spoke a fluid string of words she didn’t understand. His posture was languid, as if he hadn’t nearly been torn to pieces by blood mages. The blade against Nadya’s throat pressed harder. A colder voice responded to him, the foreign language scratched uncomfortably at her ears.

Nadya only knew the three primary languages of Kalyazin and passing Tranavian. If she wasn’t going to be able to communicate with them . . .

The boy said something else and Nadya heard the girl sigh before she felt the blade slip away. “What’s a little Kalyazi assassin doing out in the middle of the mountains?” he asked, switching to perfect Kalyazi.

Nadya was very aware of the boy’s friend at her back. “I could ask the same of you.”

She shifted Bozidarka’s spell, sharpening her vision further. The boy had skin like molten bronze and long hair with gold chains threaded through his loose curls.

He grinned.

Wicked Saints (Something Dark and Holy #1) by Emily A. Duncan | Blog Tour Review & Excerpt was originally published on Mother/Gamer/Writer

#ARC #blog tour #Book Reviews #Emily A. Duncan #Excerpts #Fantasy #Reviews by Diayll #Something Dark and Holy #Wicked Saints #MotherGamerWriter

0 notes

dazzledbybooks · 5 years

Quote

“Prepare for a snow-frosted, blood-drenched fairy tale where the monsters steal your heart and love ends up being the nightmare.” - Roshani Chokshi, New York Times bestselling author of The Star-Touched Queen A girl who can speak to gods must save her people without destroying herself. A prince in danger must decide who to trust. A boy with a monstrous secret waits in the wings. Together, they must assassinate the king and stop the war. In a centuries-long war where beauty and brutality meet, their three paths entwine in a shadowy world of spilled blood and mysterious saints, where a forbidden romance threatens to tip the scales between dark and light. Wicked Saints is the thrilling start to Emily A. Duncan’s devastatingly Gothic Something Dark and Holy trilogy. “This book destroyed me and I adored it.”- Stephanie Garber, New York Times bestselling author of Caraval Early Reviews: “Prepare for a snow frosted, blood drenched fairy tale where the monsters steal your heart and love ends up being the nightmare. Utterly absorbing.” - Roshani Chokshi, New York Times bestselling author of The Star-Touched Queen "Full of blood and monsters and magic—this book destroyed me and I adored it. Emily is a wicked storyteller, she’s not afraid to hurt her characters or her readers. If you’ve ever fallen in love with a villain you will fall hard for this book." - Stephanie Garber, New York Times bestselling author of Caraval "This is the novel of dark theology and eldritch blood-magic that I’ve been waiting for all my life. It’s got a world at once brutal and beautiful, filled with characters who are wounded, lovable, and ferocious enough to break your heart. A shattering, utterly satisfying read." - Rosamund Hodge, author of Cruel Beauty and Bright Smoke, Cold Fire “Wicked Saints is a lush, brutal, compelling fantasy that is dark, deep, and bloody—absolutely riveting! With a boy who is both man and monster, mysterious saints with uncertain motives, and a girl filled with holy magic who is just beginning to understand the full reaches of her power, this gothic jewel of a story will sink its visceral iron claws into you, never letting go until you’ve turned the last page. And truthfully, not even then -the explosive ending will haunt you for days! ” - Robin LaFevers, New York Times bestselling author of the His Fair Assassin trilogy “Dark, bloody, and monstrously romantic. This is the villain love interest that we've all been waiting for.” - Margaret Rogerson, New York Times bestselling author of An Enchantment of Ravens "Seductively dark and enchanting, Wicked Saints is a trance you won’t want to wake from. Duncan has skillfully erected a world like no other, complete with provocative magic, sinister creatures, and a plot that keeps you guessing. This spellbinding YA fantasy will bewitch readers to the very last page." - Adrienne Young, New York Times bestselling author of Sky in the Deep Excerpt: N A D4E Z H D A L A P T E V A Horz stole the stars and the heavens out from underneath Myesta’s control, and for that she has never forgiven him. For where can the moons rest if not the heavens? —Codex of the Divine, 5:26 “It’s certainly not my fault you chose a child who sleeps so deeply. If she dies it will very much be your fault, not mine.” Startled by bickering gods was not Nadya’s preferred method of being woken up. She rolled to her feet in the dark, moving automatically. It took her eyes a few sec- onds to catch up with the rest of her body. Shut up! It wasn’t wise to tell the gods to shut up, but it was too late now. A feeling of amused disdain flowed through her, but neither of the gods spoke again. She realized it was Horz, the god of the heavens and the stars, who had woken her. He had a tendency to be obnoxious but generally left Nadya alone, as a rule. Usually only a single god communed with their chosen cleric. There once had been a cleric named Kseniya Mirokhina who was gifted with unnatural marksmanship by Devonya, the goddess of the hunt. And Veceslav had chosen a cleric of his own, long ago, but their name was lost to history, and he re- fused to talk about them. The recorded histories never spoke of clerics who could hear more than one god. That Nadya com- muned with the entire pantheon was a rarity the priests who trained her could not explain. There was a chance older, more primordial gods existed, ones that had long since given up watch of the world and left it in the care of the others. But no one knew for sure. Of the twenty known gods, however, carvings and paintings depicted their human forms, though no one knew what they actually looked like. No cleric throughout history had ever looked upon the faces of the gods. No saint, nor priest. Each had their own power and magic they could bestow upon Nadya, and while some were forthcoming, others were not. She had never spoken to the goddess of the moons, My- esta. She wasn’t even sure what manner of power the goddess would give, if she so chose. And though she could commune with many gods, it was im- possible to forget just who had chosen her for this fate: Mar- zenya, the goddess of death and magic, who expected complete dedication. Indistinct voices murmured in the dark. She and Anna had found a secluded place within a copse of thick pine trees to set up their tent, but it no longer felt safe. Nadya slid a voryen from underneath her bedroll and nudged Anna awake. She moved to the mouth of the tent, grasping at her beads, a prayer already forming on her lips, smoky symbols trailing from her mouth. She could see the blurry impressions of fig- ures in the darkness, far off in the distance. It was hard to judge the number, two? Five? Ten? Her heart sped at the possibility that a company of Tranavians were already on her trail. Anna drew up beside her. Nadya’s grip on her voryen tight- ened, but she kept still. If they hadn’t seen their tent yet, she could keep them from noticing it entirely. But Anna’s hand clasped her forearm. “Wait,” she whispered, her breath frosting out before her in the cold. She pointed to a dark spot just off to the side of the group. Nadya pressed her thumb against Bozidarka’s bead and her eyesight sharpened until she could see as clearly as if it were day. It took effort to shove aside the immediate, paralyzing fear as her suspicions were confirmed and Tranavian uniforms be- came clear. It wasn’t a full company. In fact, they looked rather ragged. Perhaps they had split off and lost their way. More interesting, though, was the boy with a crossbow si- lently aiming into the heart of the group. “We can get away before they notice,” Anna said. Nadya almost agreed, almost slipped her voryen back into its sheath, but just then, the boy fired and the trees erupted into chaos. Nadya wasn’t willing to use an innocent’s life as a distraction for her own cowardice. Not again. Even as Anna protested, Nadya let a prayer form fully in her mind, hand clutching at Horz’s bead on her necklace and its constellation of stars. Symbols fell from her lips like glow- ing glimmers of smoke and every star in the sky winked out. Well, that was more extreme than I intended, Nadya thought with a wince. I should’ve known better than to ask Horz for any- thing. She could hear cursing as the world plunged into darkness. Anna sighed in exasperation beside her. “Just stay back,” she hissed as she moved confidently through the dark. “Nadya . . .” Anna’s groan was soft. It took more focus to send a third prayer to Bozetjeh. It was hard to catch Bozetjeh on a good day; the god of speed was notoriously slow to answer prayers. But she managed to snag his attention and received a spell allowing her to move as fast as the vicious Kalyazin wind. Her initial count had been wrong; there were six Tranavians now scattering into the forest. The boy dropped his crossbow with a bewildered look up into the sky, startling when Nadya touched his shoulder. There was no way he could see in this darkness, but she could. When he whirled, a curved sword in his hand, Nadya sidestepped. His swing went wide and she shoved him in the direction of a fleeing Tranavian, anticipating their collision. “Find the rest,” Marzenya hissed. “Kill them all.” Complete and total dedication. She caught up to one of the figures, stabbing her voryen into his skull just underneath his ear. Not so difficult this time, she thought. But the knowledge was a distant thing. Blood sprayed, splattering a second Tranavian, who cried out in alarm. Before the second man could figure out what had happened to his companion, she lashed out her heel, catching him squarely on the jaw and knocking him off his feet. She slit his throat. Three more. They couldn’t have moved far. Nadya took up Bozidarka’s bead again. The goddess of vision revealed where the last Tranavians were located. The boy with the sword had managed to kill two in the dark. Nadya couldn’t actually see the last one, just felt him nearby, very much alive. Something slammed into Nadya’s back and suddenly the chilling bite of a blade was pressed against her throat. The boy appeared in front of her, his crossbow back in his hands, thank- fully not pointed at Nadya. It was clear he could only barely see her. He wasn’t Kalyazi, but Akolan. A fair number of Akolans had taken advantage of the war between their neighbors, hiring out their swords for profit on both sides. They were known for favoring Tranavia simply because of the warmer climate. It was rare to find a creature of the desert willingly stumbling through Kalyazin’s snow. He spoke a fluid string of words she didn’t understand. His posture was languid, as if he hadn’t nearly been torn to pieces by blood mages. The blade against Nadya’s throat pressed harder. A colder voice responded to him, the foreign language scratched uncomfortably at her ears. Nadya only knew the three primary languages of Kalyazin and passing Tranavian. If she wasn’t going to be able to com- municate with them . . . The boy said something else and Nadya heard the girl sigh before she felt the blade slip away. “What’s a little Kalyazi as- sassin doing out in the middle of the mountains?” he asked, switching to perfect Kalyazi. Nadya was very aware of the boy’s friend at her back. “I could ask the same of you.” She shifted Bozidarka’s spell, sharpening her vision further. The boy had skin like molten bronze and long hair with gold chains threaded through his loose curls. He grinned. Buy Link: https://static.macmillan.com/static/smp/wicked-saints/ About the Author: EMILY A. DUNCAN works as a youth services librarian. She received a Master’s degree in library science from Kent State University, which mostly taught her how to find obscure Slavic folklore texts through interlibrary loan systems. When not reading or writing, she enjoys playing copious amounts of video games and dungeons and dragons. Wicked Saints is her first book. She lives in Ohio. Website: https://eaduncan.com/ Twitter: @glitzandshadows Instagram: @glitzandshadows Tumblr: https://ift.tt/2K0iS2l

http://www.dazzledbybooks.com/2019/04/wickedsaintsblogtour.html

#SEO #Local SEO training

0 notes