#and I found myself receding into the non comfort of being touchless
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I underestimated how much humans need touch
#me#personal#humans#psychology#mental health#touch starved#i miss being able to hug and cuddle my friends#my friend group from middle school which I still speak#we used to do this huge cuddle piles#when we watched movies or played videogames#we would jump on eaxh other backs#hold hands#an even lay on each others laps#one of them when he was tired would grab the closest persons hand and just place it on his head#meaning he wanted scratches#i would boop my friends noses all the time and it wasnt wierd#these are the only times I truly feel homesick#europe is great but god are they not touchy at all#and I found myself receding into the non comfort of being touchless#trying to mold myself smaller#so I wouldn’t make anyone at around me uncomortable#and now when people tell me#no! you are not touchy at all#it kinda hurts a little#i used to laugh internally when people said that they were touch starved#couldn’t understand it#lol look at me now#vent
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