Story: That Time When I Was 12 That My Mother Accidentally Took Me To A Burlesque Show
Mom's favorite book is The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas, a classic tale of adventure, justice, revenge, love, forgiveness, and, apparently, nipple pasties. So when she saw there would be a play adaptation running for one night only in the Big City near Hometown, she was so excited that she immediately bought the tickets without reading the playbill too closely.
So, there we were: country mice on an awfully big adventure, off to Big City to bond over wholesome, family-friendly fun in manner of Gilmore Girls or similar. The bouncer (there was a bouncer) asked to see our I.D.s, I said I wasn't 21 and asked if I could still sit in the theatre since the bar (there was a bar) was in the lobby. The bouncer said she'd ask her manager, but my mom went all real housewife gangsta on her: "I'm her mom, and it's okay with me that she's here." She wasn't about to miss the show when she'd already bought the tickets and had to take the train to get here, and the bouncer knew that. I love my mom.
We found our seats and I read the program while we waited for the curtain to come up. We started out like this:
"That's so weird, I didn't even know this place was 21+."
"Yeah, that seems strange for just a normal theatre, like any other. But everyone here is, like, super old."
Then we got to:
"Oh, so this is like, a modern re-telling?"
"Yeah, I guess so."
"Oh, so it must be like Clueless or 10 Things I Hate About You or something like that."
"Probably."
Then:
"Wait, this theatre company is called Manustrip?"
"Huh. That's a weird name."
And eventually:
"Mamá, is this a burlesque show?"
She didn't get the chance to reply before the show started, but I got my answer from Fuschia Folds, Annya Neese, and Miss Trixie Vermouth soon enough. Incredible performances, the highlight was watching two drag queens gag Villefort with her with her own barrister's band and whip her for misbehaving while sitting next to my middle-aged Catholic mother in a very vocal audience.
Where you lead, I will follow.
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