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altalksaboutstuff · 4 years

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Shantae: 1/2 Genie Hero

From the 16th of this month, March 2020, to the 15th of next month, April 2020, Games with Gold has the excellent platformer – Shantae: ½ Genie Hero. As long as you have an active Xbox Live or Xbox Gamepass Ultimate subscription

It's “FREE” to download during that period but even after April 15th, you can keep playing it, it won't leave your library and if you let your subscription expire it will still remain, you just can't play it.

I have had Gamepass for about a year now, I wanted to kind of document my journey and time with games on Gamepass and one of the first that I played when I got the service last year was Shantae: ½ Genie Hero. Unfortunately, this game is no longer available on the service and I thought back in September of 2019 that I had lost my chance to talk about it in a relevant sense, but lo and behold its back now – kind of, in a zombie-esque way.

The game expiring from Gamepass was actually the launching point for me to a Switch. It was my birthday in September and Shantae was just about to be removed from the service, great present Microsoft. I was kind of depressed that in this moment in my life that I had spent about a quarter of a year playing the game that was just going to up and leave. Now I could have bought it and at a discount but if I did that I would be getting just the base game that I was practically done with. I also had all this extra money from my birthday burning a hole in my pocket and instead doing something smart like putting towards my mortgage – I ended up buying a Switch to cheer me up. And what does the Switch have but the physical version of Shantae: ½ Genie Hero that includes all the DLC.

THAT – and the fact that one of my favorite games of all time was just remade – Link's Awakening.

So I got those two games to cope with the fact that I wouldn't be able to play Shantae on Gamepass anymore in a few days ...but I had also gotten my wife a Switch Lite for our anniversary so I kind of wanted a reason to give it to them early and we had a Switcheversay on September 28th.

NERD!

On a side note of this tangent – I feel like I'm always a little behind with Nintendo, with my earliest exposure to Nintendo being no different. Way back in the dark ages of the early 1990s I was a Genesis Lad. After school I was in a program where I first got to play a Nintendo game, there were NES consoles, games and Ataris as well. While kids at school were telling me, “YA GOTTA PLAY Donkey Kong Country 2 and Mega Man X!” The cutting edge stuff of the time, I would root around and find other games like Donkey Kong Jr. and Mega Man 2 on NES. Now don't get me wrong, those were great games I loved then and still love now but I was behind the times. I just didn't have a Super Nintendo, like most of my peers that I went to school with. I just had the Sega. So when most were playing Super Mario World, Chrono Trigger and A Link to Past – I was playing Sonic... Sonic (Sonic 2)... and Sonic... (Sonic 3 but not & knuckles)

BUT Sonic is great!

When my friends had a Gameboy Advance, I still had a Gameboy Color. When the DS was the hot handheld, I got a Gameboy Advance, I got a 3DS around the time Fire Emblem Fates came out when it seemed like everyone was clamoring for a new portable technology and I got a Wii U when it was all but dead. As previous stated, I only got a Switch last September. Heck, I haven't even played the new Mary-o yet

Pushing forwarding in the way back machine to the time when I was a still a young teen, at the age of 14, I remember a Gameboy Color game came out that I really wanted to get – Shantae. I don't even know why I really wanted it other than it was a new Gameboy Color game when new Gameboy Color games weren't coming out. Like, I remember the Gameboy Advance came out about a year ago but I didn't need one according to my parents-

Me: Mom, can I get a Gameboy Advanced? Mom: You have Gameboy Advance at Home ::At home::

So the impact of a new Gameboy Color game coming out - blew … me … away.

Of course - I didn't get that game either.

Now don't get me wrong, I still got games as a kid on birthdays and Christmas but I feel like the games I didn't get are the ones I look back at and think – If only...

(^I never had a Neo Geo but I wanted this game)

Love you Mom and Dad

Back to Shantae though

Tangents aside – why do I think I like this game?

Why is it when I played Half Genie Hero in June of 2019 did I really got hooked on it well until the end of summer? I play, play, played it – all the modes, collect the endings, the tedious achievements like Queen of the Seven Cheese where you have to beat Risky Boots by just chomping at her as a mouse doing 1 damage at at a time.... ugh! For achievements I even … gasp (teeth noise) … speed ran it. And successfully, not on my first attempt though! Or … at least successfully enough to get the endings and achievements. I've never speed ran a game before, at least on purpose. I drew bad fan art!

(^Unlike everything else on this post, I actually drew that [sorry])

For the first time in my life I even looked into Fan Fiction.

Which, on a side note, I don't recommend you look at most of the fan fiction that I’ve seen if you are at work.

The game really got its hooks into me and I'm not exactly sure why but I think I might know.

Well, it feels like a SEGA Genesis game – long story short.

Short story long - I think the best way to classify what kind of game this is, is Metroidvania. You have a mini map and you unlock powers that later allow you to explore the rest of the levels you had previous been to and there are collectibles and upgrades you can buy in game. As you play you can upgrade how Shantae attacks by purchasing upgrades for her hair whip attack or armor but the big mechanic is the transformations – you can turn into animals with varied attacks and abilities as well as some other inanimate objects and living things like this tree

- to help you better get across the stages and discover the secrets of Sequin Land.

I've also read its kind of Mega Man– ish which I had never really thought about before but yeah, because I do love some Mega Man. It has a lot of obstacles/the levels are kinds of obstacle courses like the early NES Mega Man games and there are two areas particularly in my mind – The factory in Mermaid Falls and the Hypno Baron's Castle part of the … Hypno Baron's Castle stage. Well most of it is actually like an obstacle course now that I think about it

The score is by Jake Kauffman and man, AND if I ever make a game I want that guy doing my music. I mentioned the factory part of Mermaid Falls before – the best track in the game and maybe even in any game I've ever heard is Counterfeit Mermaids, its such an earworm,

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KkXd26E_Ynw

I feel like this song and Neo Town Burning are the two best games

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yParHIzy1nA

You are going to be in the camp that one is better than the other (though Counterfeit Mermaids is clearly the superior track, ahem)

Its a great soundtrack, I find myself tuning into it during my commute to work and sometime even turning off my podcast or audio books to listen to this soundtrack (yes Even Neo Town Burning too). The game's lead voice actress according IMDB is Cristina Valenzuela (sometimes credited as Cristina Vee) who sings the games title theme that also appears in the first level, Scuttle Town the first time you play the level and also when you first boot up the game its there too. POW! Give it a listen – sample plays and fades. Its great. This soundtrack is really memorable and still in my rotation almost a year after I played it for the first time.

The characters themselves too are varied in personality and the styles are now toted as being“in high definition”.

Shantae is my least favorite but I think that works well in the sense of self insert. And that's not to say Shantae doesn't have a personality, she is kind of bubbly and she cares a lot about her ties such as to her family - such her uncle Mimic and her late mother - and to her friends. The three main friends that back Shantae during her journey (that also get their own adventure in the DLC)

Sky - a somewhat more responsible friend of your that is out to give you some counsel and a ride to each stage on her cool bird

Bolo – who offers a bit of comic relief

Rotty Tops the zombie that is a true friend that shows up to support you and cheer you on, in one time literally too.

By the way there is also Risky Boots (the best character, IMO) who is the larger than life antagonist to akin to a comic book villain.

But even with the “HD” graphics, and incredible score everything about just feels like … a Sega game. I can't really put it to words to do it justice, like, it has the essence of games I grew up with. I know a lot of people already had that nostalgia rush with Freedom Planet or Sonic Mania but I only just got Freedom Planet on Switch

Which is great so far, by the way

and Sonic Mania is on my to do pile

so for me – Shantae was it.

I felt that joy like I was 5 years old playing Sonic 2 for the first time. I took me something embarrassing like 8 hours to beat the first time. But after I beat it, I immediately wanted to play it again. I almost NEVER want to replay a game after I beat it – Best case is I take a break and play it again in a year. While it took me a laughable amount of hours to beat the game the first time but by the time I was really invested and on the 3rd or 4th time replaying it, I was completing it in under 2 hours. I was looking up speed running strats and Youtube videos of people speed running the game to compare and contrast how I played the game. I never, ever thought that I would speed run a game. Super Metroid still takes me an embarrassing number of hours to play and I've beat that almost as many times as Shantae now.

Having played both the Xbox One and Switch versions they look pretty similar and seem to play about the same. I noticed that the game seems to run a bit better on the Xbox One and the load times aren't as long

So I really recommend you get this game. I'm super jealous if you've never played it, you get to experience it for the first time! If you don't have an Xbox One but have a Switch you can get the physical version for pretty cheap, used I got this copy for about $20 and it has all the game content. And with the DLC you can finally play as Risky Boots!

It goes without saying that the game I am most excited for this year, 2020 is going to be Shantae and the Seven Sirens.

If you don't have an Xbox or a Switch, the game is also on PC too. Steam has sales, last time the Ultimate Edition was on sale it was only about $21 (show pic) and with a plug and play controls great.

And just as I was checking before posting this, it is on sale for $20.99 until March 30th, 2020

Its also on PS4, I guess if you don’t have any other options

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disregardcanon · 4 years

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a decade of self recs

i’d like to invite anyone who wants to to participate in this exercise along with me!

this is a self rec and a reflection on a fic from each year of the decade

fandoms include: percy jackson, adventure time, a song of ice and fire, girl meets world, gravity falls, young justice, the flash, my hero academia, the mcu, and the handmaid’s tale.

2010: I didn’t even know what fanfiction was! oh my gosh i was a baby!

2011:

I Won’t Ever Leave You Alone

Fandom: Percy Jackson

Pairings: Percy/Annabeth

Summary: What happens when Percy's sent to the Roman Camp and flat out does not want to remember his past? Can it have a happy ending? It's my first fan fiction and I hope you enjoy.

A.N: This WAS the first fanfiction that I ever wrote. It was bad. It’s STILL bad. however... if I didn’t ever write this one, then I never would have gotten less bad. That’s important!

2012:

The Ice Prince

Fandom: Adventure Time

Summary: "Some say the world will end in fire, some say in ice" Robert Frost. The lonely ice prince wonders a frozen wasteland of his own creation, searching for companionship he will never be fortunate enough to find, with only vague recollections and half memories as comfort. Drabble Ice Prince!Finn

A.N: this fic is actually shorter than the author’s note I wrote for it, but... I’m not going to lie. The atmosphere work is really great and the wording flows really nicely. I’m proud of this little piece. I think out of everything that I wrote that year, it shows my potential the best.

2013:

Hot Chocolate Heals All Wounds

Fandom: Percy Jackson

Pairings: Reyna/Annabeth and past Percy/Annabeth

Summary: Moving on is never easy, but with hot chocolate, love, laughter and Reyna by her side, Annabeth might just manage.

A.N: 2013 was where I really started to take off as a fic writer. I improved drastically over the course of the year, but I still think that this fic that I wrote during the summer is the closest to my heart. It’s the first of my “ladies getting over trauma together and falling in love” genre.

It’s not as good as I remember it being, and oh lordy. the smut.. the smut is bad. But there’s a lot of potential here, and I can still look back on it fondly.

2014:

The River Rushes On

Fandom: A Song of Ice and Fire

Pairings: Catelyn/Cersei

Summary: The official reason that she is sent to Riverrun is so that she can learn to be a proper lady alongside Hoster’s daughters. The unofficial reason, of course, is that Tywin found his golden twins having sex.

Or, the one where all good things end, but life continues.

A.N: I had a bit of debate going between this one and a sansaery fic that I wrote that year, but I decided that this HAD to be the choice. Catelyn/Cersei is a pairing that I came to on my own, but I ended up really loving because of the friends I made through the pairing. While this might not have been might best writing of the year, I feel like it was a formative enough experience that it overrides that.

honorable mention: like the songs, a tragic sansaery au where sansa was a traveling singer

2015:

Caged

Fandom: A Song of Ice and Fire

Pairings: Sansa/Margaery

Summary: In an alternate universe where many of the members of the Westerosi elite are magical creatures, the Lannisters seal Sansa Stark's wolf form deep within her. Margaery Tyrell vows to break the spell.

A.N: this is where we get into fics that I might actually recommend to someone. This one was one of the last fics that I wrote during high school, and it was inspired by our class reading of Macbeth and the emotional turmoil of getting ready to head off to college. There’s still some stuff I’m REALLY proud of in there. The spell ingredient “blood of a lover, willingly drawn” is still fantastic, the dream is still chilling, and I honestly sometimes think of adapting this premise into an original story.

honorable mentions: a guide to coming out, the girl meets world edition

her heart’s duet, the mabifica soulmate’s au

2016:

Over the Shadowy Hills

Fandoms: Young Justice

Pairings: Artemis/Zatanna

Summary: Wally is dead, but Artemis isn't. She's trying to learn how to deal with that.Featuring: Bart Allen, product placement Netflix isn't paying me for, blatant symbolism, and snaibsel sweaters.

A.N: 2016 was a REALLY hard one. I wanted to put like, 3 star wars rebels fics, but i’m holding myself to my one fic per year policy, and if it’s one fic for year... then it has to be over the shadowy hills.

one of my other friends helped me work this into a fic that i could be really proud of, and it’s the better version of the same fic type as “hot chocolate heals all wounds” from a couple years earlier. i’m still really pleased with the way that this one panned out and i couldn’t leave it out of a best list,

the honorable mentions: you were someone, once the winter soldiered! ezra fic that helped me become friends with @bodhimcbodeface, the ketbine soulmate au where sabine drew dicks all over her face, and then there’s the mirialan!ezra au.

2017:

you, me, and the flash makes three

Fandom: The Flash

Pairings: Cisco/Iris, eventual Cisco/Barry/Iris

Summary: When Barry Allen wakes up from his coma, he finds out that Iris is dating Cisco. He tries really hard to dislike the guy, but Cisco makes it really hard. He's a likable dude.Things get more complicated from there.

A.N: i have a few others that i would have liked to put for this year, but i saw “you me and the flash makes three” and then i was like. well shit. i can’t pick anything else. this fic is a little under 15k and it’s really one of my favorite things that i’ve ever written. it’s a little cheesy and at parts feels a little clunky, but i think that the way that i was able to hit the most important emotional beats for season one of the flash and flesh out all the relationships within an ot3 outweigh that.

honorable mentions are: how to fall in love with your mark, the bluepulse fic where bart allen realizes that he can’t kill jaime reyes and

mantis prays to oregon, the guardians of the galaxy vol. 2 fic where mantis is ego’s biological child, but that somehow makes everything worse

2018:

Ad Astra Per Aspera

Fandom: My Hero Academia

Pairings: Ochako/Bakugo

Summary: Ochako sees none of herself in Bakugo’s pure rage, her sheer confidence. Bakugo holds up an enormous middle finger to the world and says come and get it. She’s harsh. She’s loud. She’s angry. She doesn’t say what’s on her mind; she shouts it.If she’s being completely honest, Ochako is a bit in awe with her.People might not like her, but they take her seriously. Bakugo grabs them by the throats, pulls them in and says “I am woman, hear me roar."

Sequel to "knights in shining armor"

A.N: 2018 was the year that I embraced the gender bend and started writing bildungsromans that deal with coming of age and trying to puzzle out wtf being a person and gender even are. I’m really pleased with all of them, but this is my favorite. Partially because I think it’s the most well-written, partially because I like the motifs the best, but mainly because it taught me a lot about myself and my writing.

Also it accidentally got me to ship kacchako, which is something I appreciate.

honorable mentions: hers, not his: the fem!todoroki one where she learns that sometimes telling your dad to fuck off isn’t worth giving up the things that you love

gimme a boost over heaven’s gate, the one where eleanor and tahani end up on the same talk show together. then bone. then become better people

2019:

Paint a New Horizon

Fandoms: A Song of Ice and Fire

Pairings: Sansa/Margaery and abusive Sansa/Joffrey

Summary: Sansa is a painter. The moment that she meets Joffrey he becomes her muse. After they get married she starts to see his true colors unfold in front of her and she loses her passion. Then she meets Margaery. Her presence changes everything, and reignites a passion for painting and for life that Sansa thought was long buried. It’s too bad that leaving Joffrey isn’t an easy task.

A.N: this fic is 23k of my sweat and tears. i know that it’s kind of a weird premise, but this was the most gripping writing i’ve done all year. it was exactly right for me at that moment.

however, it does spell a bit of a turning point in my writing and life. in the past, i have written short fics that i could get posted fairly quickly. this fic was the result of multiple weeks of work when i was off school, not working much, and focusing mainly on... writing this damn thing. moving forward, i’m going to have to try to figure out a way to keep up my motivation and drive with longer projects when i don’t have the time to dedicate to HUGE chunks of work at one time when i also know i’m not going to get the instant gratification of kudos immediately after a long writing sesh. i know that sounds silly, but this is the first year where the majority of the fics i wrote WERE longer.

while i’m very pleased with all of these longer fics, it does mark a shift that i will just have to learn how to deal with.

honorable mention: A Woman’s Place, the handmaid’s tale time travel fix it fic

#self recs #decade meme #a decade of writing in review #sansaery #reynabeth #mabifica #bluepulse #barriscowest #ketbine #rilaya #larkle

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sol1056 · 5 years

Note

EPs: "we chose Netflix to explore things like sexuality" (nothing was explored or was explicit for even 2 seconds) "when they told us u cant kill Shiro, we knew we could push the reveal 4 later" (so nice of them to admit they stopped our rep just to be able to kill him) "when we found out about byg we knew we coulnt kill Shiro & we thought we'll find rep w another character. Then we learned we could go on w/ Shiro as the rep" (theres ANOTHER REP WE DIDNT GET?? Was it vague then erased? Whatt??)

I think these are two separate issues. One is related to who made VLD, and the other is related to the EPs’ ignorance of characterization. The second overlaps with a bunch of asks I’ve recently gotten about race and representation, so here I’m just keeping it to a general discussion of characterization, with Lance as example. And then about Shiro in particular, how the EPs’ statements reveal their lack of thought.

Behind the cut.

remember where these people came from

The team behind VLD is almost entirely formerly Nickelodeon. DreamWorks wanted to break into television on a much larger scale, and since they almost always promote from outside the company, they lured over Margie Cohn from her position as a Nick VP. As VP/exec levels tend to do, Cohn brought a bunch of people with her.

One of those was Mark Taylor, who’d been involved in both AtLA and LoK. Taylor, in turn, brought JDS, LM, and I think one or two of the other producers. Taylor also probably brought over Hamilton, Chan, and Hedrick, as known entities with proven track records.

These are people who — for for the last ten or more years — have swum in Nickelodeon’s considerably more conservative fishbowl. It’s entirely possible (given what people tell me about storylines in HTTYD, and DW’s open support of She-Ra) the former Nickelodeon team automatically downgraded DW’s “go ahead and explore these heavier/darker topics” to mean “maybe kinda mention in passing but don’t be too obvious about it.”

Now, to be fair, the EPs may have pushed for more LGBT+ rep, and their obstacle might not have been DW, but Taylor. It’d explain how the EPs could praise everyone (read: DreamWorks staff) as supportive, yet allso complain about pushback (read: Taylor’s Nickelodeon-influenced sensibilities). Two different parties were calling the shots.

It’s also possible what the EPs saw as ‘rep’ was still considerably toned-down from what DW execs (and the VAs) may’ve expected. After all, that one-minute scene in VLD might’ve required an act of god at Nickelodeon. VLD’s staff may have genuinely considered this scene landmark because even that tiny bit was far more than their previous employer would’ve allowed.

Cue the victory lap and excited chatter, and seeming blindness to Korra being long since surpassed by Steven Universe, Young Justice, Bob’s Burgers, Adventure Time, Gravity Falls, RWBY, Rick and Morty, Clarence, BoJack Horseman, Danger & Eggs, Big Mouth, and Summer Camp Island. Remember, it wasn’t until 2016 that Nickelodeon would have a married gay couple (in The Loud House), and they’re not even central characters. The VLD staff may’ve thought itself bold, and unprepared for the reality of modern (non-Nickelodeon) audience expectations.

No, I don’t think that absolves them. It just seems the most reasonable explanation. That is, short of seeing the EPs as so utterly cynical they’d pump up the audience for what amounted to a nothingburger in light of what else popular media now delivers.

and then there’s representation

VLD’s troubles can all be traced to one crucial detail: the EPs don’t understand that characters are the bedrock of stories. And as such, there are no shortcuts.

Ever had the misfortune to catch a home decorating show? Here we have a windowless basement: mock up a mantle from polystyrene, paint the walls gray, put up sconces with flickering lightbulbs… it’s still a basement. It’s just now desperately pretending to be something it isn’t. The bones of the structure are undeniably American Suburbia, not generic castle keep, and those bones are integral to how we experience the space.

The average person isn’t trained to be aware of those bones — the underlying architecture — and its subtle impact on our experience, just as most non-storytellers aren’t trained to see how and where and why characters create plot. I guarantee you, though, you will never mistake a late-century Kmart for the Centre Pompidou or the Forbidden City or Mount Vernon. Just as you would never mistake a beginner’s first novel for Lord of the Rings or Left Hand of Darkness.

That is, the dressed stone isn’t paint and plaster; it’s a core element informing (even dictating) height, width, and depth of a space. Characterization is the same: it must be structural. In turn, characters inform the breadth and depth of the story. If your characterization is shallow, wild swerves and dramatic reveals can make the story fun, but they will never make it deep.

I empathize with the (hopefully genuine) intent to avoid making Shiro’s sexuality a ‘reveal.’ The unfortunate truth is: waiting 60+ episodes to even mention in passing makes it a reveal. It wasn’t structural, or viewers would’ve been sensing it from the very beginning.

This isn’t a haircut or a pair of jeans. It’s a person’s identity, and that has crucial impact on hopes, fears, desires, and needs. It doesn’t start only once the audience is let in on the secret; it was always there. It should’ve informed the character’s actions and reactions all along.

If Lance is Cuban, and the story takes place in a quasi-future America, then to understand Lance’s perspective, we need to ask questions like: is Cuba still under embargo? Is it a free democracy now, or did Lance’s family flee at some point? Is he part of an exchange program, or is there a lottery that let him come to the US for his education? Did he leave his family behind? How young was he, when he left? What was his childhood like, and how does that differ from what he found in America? What was his parents’ relationship like, and how does that influence his expectations for friends and lovers?

Was he fluent in English when he arrived, or did he only become fluent later? Does his Spanish have a noticeable accent, and if so, has he felt isolated from other Latinx at school? Or is he the only Latino at the Garrison? Is he proud of his heritage, or ashamed of it? Did he get bullied for being foreign, and how did that change what he says/does? Even if America is joyfully multi-cultural, he’d still be an immigrant or foreigner, and that’s a different experience from a non-white community that’s multi-generation American. What was his impression of his new life? What compared favorably (or not) to his childhood?

It’s not just, “He’s a boy from Cuba.” You have to think about what it means to be ‘from Cuba’ and how this is different from, say, growing up next door to the Garrison (like Pidge probably did). If you put that much thought into it, if you talk to people who’ve lived that experience, if you push yourself to imagine as deeply as you can how Lance’s life would have shaped him?

By the time you’re done, Lance would never need to say a word.

His reactions, his assumptions, maybe a few mannerisms, his humor, a few throwaway comments about his family or things he did as a kid — and there would be Cubans in the audience going, “hey, wait a minute, he’s just like my cousin.” Or brother or uncle or friend. By the time someone asks at a panel? Half the audience would be saying, yeah, we were right, Lance is totally Cuban.

Or you don’t think about it, and you use stereotypes in hopes that’ll do the work for you. As @sjwwerewolf commented:

Man, I’m ready to rant about Voltron. I’m Cuban. Lance, oh boy, Lance. From season 1 on, he has been written as a huge stereotype. The flirtatious, passionate comic relief character who’s dumb. Like. He’s literally Antman’s sidekick. That character. All you need to make him a full caricature is like, “I have a gangster brother.“

The stereotype is a shortcut. It’s slapping on behaviors without thought for a real person’s experiences or perspectives. VLD is, sadly, full of them: the Latino (wannabe) lover, the big guy who likes food (with only the slightest twist to have him actually good at cooking), the boyish-girl who’s a brain and likes computers more than people, etc.

just pull shiro out of a hat

At some point early on, the EPs said (once again in an interview, not in the story) that VLD is a world without homophobia. The story itself contradicts that ideal, or at least, it emphasizes a certain level of heternormativity over an open embrace of diverse relationships. What’s in our face for six seasons is Lance’s lover-boy stereotype, Allura’s attraction to Lotor, Lotor’s attraction to Allura, Matt’s attraction to Allura, and so on… and the closest we get to anything resembling an alternate attraction is one blush from a servant in a flashback, and Kuron’s startled reaction to Keith’s return.

All VLD had to do was have Hunk mention his moms. Or Coran mention his late husband. Or Lance mention his sister’s wife. Something explicit to offset the heterosexual attractions going on. Frankly, for six seasons it was an open question whether homosexuality even existed in VLD: the absence of a negative is not proof of the presence of a positive.

That absence means we really have no idea how being queer in VLD’s world would affect a character — and it would, have no doubt. Our sexuality affects every single one of us; it’s just that straight people have the benefit of seeing the roadmap of their sexuality played out in a million books, movies, and television shows. If you haven’t given thought to whether this is also true in your world, then you don’t really know how a character could discover, define, and map their sexuality, or how they’d quantify or qualify relationships that overlap their sexual preferences. You don’t understand the structure.

That lack of thought means, nine times out of ten, the creator has said to themselves, “it’s easier to just say this character’s experience of their sexuality is exactly like the one I, as a straight person, vaguely recall having (that I never actually had to question because it was already mapped out for me, everywhere I looked).” That’s not a queer character. That’s a character with a label slapped on their forehead that says here be a queer character. It’s paint, because the structure underneath is straight person.

Which means that of course the EPs could consider making someone else “the rep,” because they really seem to believe this is as easy as removing the label from Shiro’s forehead and sticking it on someone else. And it’s not. People don’t work like that. Sexuality is no more a simple paint-job than race, gender, culture, or dis/ability. Each of these things is etched on our bones, literally or metaphorically, and that changes us all the way through.

The short version, then, is: no, we wouldn’t have gotten any other rep, just as we haven’t truly gotten any rep as VLD was delivered. Shiro has a label on his forehead, but unless and until the canonical story demonstrates this goes all the way down to his bones… he’s just a straight suburban basement with a mediocre paint job and some fake queer columns.

#vld #voltron #characterization #representation #sol thinks about stuff

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the-record-newspaper · 5 years

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The Killing of Rhonda Hinson: Part II

Rhonda Hinson and Greg McDowell

(Editor’s Note: The 1980’s was a violent decade for women in Wilkes and surrounding counties. At least four young women were murdered between 1981and 1987—their cases remain unresolved: Rhonda Hinson of Burke County — who has relatives in Wilkes County, Angela Hamby of Wilkes, who disappeared in 1982, Sherry Hart of Ashe County, and Candy Roberson of Wilkes. This series, “The Killing of Rhonda Hinson” is the second in a trilogy of murder cases that will be detailed in The Record over the ensuing weeks and months — cold cases of crimes perpetrated against women over 30-years ago, whose families await justice and closure.)

By LARRY J. GRIFFIN

Special Investigative Reporter

I’m really sorry and I apologize for pushing you. I really lost my temper and I’m sorry for being so stupid…I’m sorry I’m so jealous, but I can’t help it….—Excerpted from a letter Greg McDowell wrote to Rhonda Hinson during their Senior Year, 1981.

By all appearances, Greg McDowell and Rhonda Hinson were an ideal match.

Born on Feb. 7, 1963 to Rev. Charles and Betty McDowell, Gregory Lynn shared several early commonalities with Rhonda Hinson. Both were born on a Thursday. He, like her, also came from a family with two children whose birth orders were identical — an older girl and a younger boy — the age variance, in each instance, between the two siblings was virtually the same. Additionally, his parents came to North Carolina from South Carolina just as the Hinsons had done. Even their names — whether given or full — had exactly the same number of letters.

Interestingly, the differences between them seemed to work to the mutual advantage of each: Greg was an accomplished student and a medium athlete; Rhonda was the accomplished athlete and a medium student. In one of his many missives addressed to her, Greg noted that even their dissimilarities were, in fact, complementary in nature. “…I may be better in Math, but you are a better typer [sic] than me. We both do some things good and some things not so good.”

No one knows for certain when Rhonda Hinson started dating Greg McDowell; however, there is agreement that it must have been in the Fall of their junior year. During the budding romance, Greg had a penchant for sending cards to his new girlfriend; in fact, there were at least nine cards forwarded to Rhonda during the 1979-1980 school year that remain in the possession of her parents. One American Greetings “get-well” card noted an early milestone in their relationship:

…Thanks for the happiest 4 months of my life and always remember that I love you!!! Greg

P.S. We have 82 years and 8 months to go!

And in a Hallmark card with an Emily Dickinson quote embossed in gold on the front plate, the young McDowell references yet another milestone; he penned:

You’ve given me much happiness over the past 25 weeks. Keep it up forever! I will always love you!

Love, Greg

Unable to locate a suitable greeting card to mark their first-year anniversary, Greg fabricated his own: a booklet of thirteen 3x5 index cards befittingly stitched together with a bright red ribbon. Then he authored an amorous aphorism:

Rhonda, After all we’ve done together

Through hot and cold and snowy weather,

There’s something that I just must say,

On this, our very Special Day;

Looking back on what we’ve done,

I’d say we’ve had some fun;

But as we watched some things go wrong,

We found it helped our Love grow strong;

So, I know one day we’ll be,

Together, Forever—‘Just You-n-Me!’

I want to say one more thing, Pup-E,

Happy Anniversary!!!

I Love You!!

Greg

Other cards contained Valentine’s greetings, pledges of lifelong love and devotion, lamentations of pain catalyzed by the absence of the object of his affection, and “get-well” sentiments. All were thoughtful — even sweet — overtures proffered by a young man clearly and happily smitten, laced with as much chivalry as could be mustered in Burke County in the 1980’s.

And Rhonda seemed to delight in the attention she was incessantly receiving from her new suitor. Mother Judy Hinson concurs, “I would say that during the first year that they dated, Rhonda was truly happy.”

During the couple’s 1980-81 senior year, cards were supplanted by missives written in pencil and ink upon notebook paper. Rhonda apparently kept most of them — over 25 letters and three cards, carefully preserved by her parents. Though these contained similar, repetitive declarations of lifelong love and devotion; the letters were less playfully reflective of young love and gradually resonated a darker tone — becoming increasingly more insistent, more demanding, more desperate, with a foreboding edge.

Predictably, disagreements between the two young people arose periodically, and indications of these commenced to appear within the lines of Greg’s handwritten notes, though somewhat downplayed.

Oh guess what? We forgot to straighten out that big argument that we didn’t have on the phone last night! I am right! Basketball is not numero uno in my life! So there! That settles that. Quickly changing the subject….

Admitting to having a “bad day” at school at some juncture, Greg writes:

…I’m sorry about while ago. I didn’t mean to be like that. I’m just so tired. I’m really sorry. I know you don’t feel too well either; so, let’s try extra hard to be nice to each other, OK? Thanks for understanding (if you do)…I’m really sorry I was like that while ago.

PS. Come at 6:00 unless you here [sic] from me. We’ll get some supper if you want any. I will be hungry.

Almost imperceptible at first, the letters began to assume an austere tone, indicative of more pervasive upheavals.

Rhonda…I am not eating lunch today; I’m sitting where we were at break today and I’m writing you this letter. It’s kind of hard to hold back the tears; so, if this paper is wet, you will know why. I just can’t imagine us not being together and when I think of it, I go to pieces. I want you to know that I love you now and I always will love you. I never want to hurt you and I would never intentionally hurt you. I’m sorry, very sorry about the things I said…I want you to know that I didn’t mean it. I want us to go on like we were and forget about this. I love you very much and I don’t want this or anything else to pull us apart.

I know I make lots of mistakes; but, I try so hard to make you happy….All I ask in return is love and understanding…Please forgive me when I make you mad and try to think about the good things I do for you…I really do love you and I’m sorry I hurt you, really.

The tenor of Greg’s notes and letters recommends to suspicion that he was becoming increasingly frustrated by Rhonda’s ostensible lack of reciprocity. He would take the time — even class time when he was bored — throughout the day to write a note to be hurriedly delivered to Rhonda as he passed her in the hallway, while en route to other classes and activities that the two did not share. Periodically, he relied upon the “Mercury” services of a friend to discreetly pass along his impromptu messages, garnering little — if any — response from the girl he loved.

“Rhonda just wasn’t that type of girl — she wasn’t very demonstrative of feelings,” Judy Hinson recollected. “In fact, she was very private about them. She wouldn’t even cry in front of us — and she hardly ever said, ‘I love you.’”

Perhaps Greg failed to understand that predilection or felt that he could somehow motivate Rhonda to become more responsive to him. It is not surprising that he began to vent his frustration within pointed paragraphs:

…From now on, I’m not going to mention anything about you writing me a note at lunch. It’s up to you, anyway, and I can’t do anything about it. If you want to write something you will and if you don’t you won’t. But I’m not saying I don’t care, because I do care and I want you to write but I can’t make you. So, it’s up to you…From 8:20 – 3:03, I see you every bit of 25 minutes…So, please understand why I want you to write during lunch. Ok?

With each passing day of the senior year, Greg McDowell seemed to grow more insecure about the relationship he had with Rhonda Hinson. His increased uncertainty triggered a proportional surge of jealousy that commenced to subtly surface. In one postal script appended to a note he admonishes, “Don’t flirt with the customer’s [sic] at work.” But during one full-blown jealous conflagration, Greg became physically aggressive for which he later apologized — in a letter, of course:

Dear Rhoda,

I’m sorry and I apologized for pushing you. I really lost my temper and I’m sorry for being so stupid. Please forgive me. Really, I’m sorry for pushing you. I just lost my temper. Please understand. I love you and you can do anything you want to me to get me back. I deserve it. I’m sorry I’m so jealous, but I can’t help it. When I read the part about ‘love ya’ and ‘wish I’d gotten to know you a lot sooner’ and ‘see you at work this summer’ and ‘play tennis with you this summer,’ I naturally got upset. I hope you don’t care for him. If you don’t you shouldn’t mind me beating his ass.

I love you,

Greg

In a series of reflective recollections that Judy Hinson penned on notebook paper, she proffered this observation: “I think [Rhonda] enjoyed Greg’s being jealous and possessive [at first] but then I think she had gotten tired of his demanding to know everything she did — where she went, who she talked to — everything.”

One of the recurring themes articulated through the letters of Greg McDowell was his desire for Rhonda to return to being her ebullient, insouciant self subsequent to an argument or misunderstanding. Several times he cajoles her to be happy, to smile, and to be glad to see him. In one of his short missives, Greg reassures Rhonda that he loves her and that it hurts him to see her “sad, upset, or worried.” Then he appends a poignant postal script:

“You’d better be happy and smile and be your usual self tonight or I’ll shoot you with my shotgun!”

Rhonda Hinson had approximately12 months to live.

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canaryatlaw · 7 years

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Alright, so today was pretty good, fun Memorial Day. Slept in of course, woke up sometime around noon and just laid in bed being lazy for a while before getting up and getting some breakfast. Around 2 or so my roommates two friends showed up, and we hung out for a while, they played guitar hero, before we grabbed our grilling supplies and headed outside. We don't exactly have a patio, it's more like a decently sized concrete rectangle behind our apartment building, which is kind of sad because like, all the houses around us have these awesome decks behind them, but hey, we'll take it. My roommate bought this dinky little grill for like $20 at target or Walmart, and by the time we even get the charcoal in it a bolt had like flown off the handle and two of the leg pads were off, lol, but hey, non-essential parts. The grill just fit 7 burgers, 6 in a ring on the outside and 1 in the middle, and like, I'm talking JUST fit lol. There wasn't one square inch left unused on this grill. They decided to just cook all the meat and divide shit later, I know literally nothing about grilling anything (I'm like watching them with the lighter fluid and in the back of my mind thinking about the jimmy johns commercial with lighter fluid and thinking "that was a gas grill, not a charcoal grill, right?") so I'm just going with it. So we sit and grill, when the burgers are done we do some brats and hot dogs, and we just chilled out next to it. Somewhere along the line I felt the sun on my back and knew if I didn't do something I would get a sunburn, so I ran back upstairs and got the little stick of sunscreen I keep in my purse (year round, cuz you never know) and tried to get it to cover all the space on my back not covered by clothing, lol. The tank top I was wearing actually had a high back so there wasn't that much space left over, and I did a pretty good job covering it, I only ended up with one tiny spot of sunburn on my neck. I still haven't switched my clothing over to summer clothes since its been so cold, something I'll have to figure out when I pack to leave on Friday and spend the next two weeks in New York. But today was obviously going to be in the 70s and we were gonna be outside for a decent amount of time, so I put on the like, one tank top I had in my drawer and grabbed a single pair of shorts from my giant suitcase I use for clothes storage (lol I have too much clothing) and wore those. I guess we'll see how the rest of the week goes in terms of weather and whether (lol) I'll fully switch over. I should technically have time after work, maybe Wednesday when I don't have PT, since prison break having its finale should really be the last of my tv shows still airing (I guess you could count the Handmaid's tale but I'm not like dying to watch those episodes ASAP) but I tend to be emotionally drained after work and don't want to do that kind of stuff, which is why the laundry I did last weekend still isn't put away and there's an ever growing pile of dirty clothes on my floor (sigh). But, anyway. Once all the meat was cooked we decided to eat inside, so we closed the grill to try and put out the rest of the fire (again, no idea how grilling works). So we go back inside and I get a hamburger (or I guess cheeseburger, we only had shredded cheese so the cheese was kind of weak but it still existed) and a hot dog since we have so many of both, I ended up taking like two bites of the burger before deciding it just wasn't doing it for me, but the hot dog was pretty good (I've traditionally been a hot dog person, though I do like burgers). We continued to hang out for a bit longer and I ended up making funfetti cupcakes using the cake mix I keep on hand for baking purposes and the hacks I know to make cake mix cakes taste better (because I'm a pro like that). They turned out pretty good and were quick enough, so now we have cupcakes as well. The boys hung out for a little while longer before heading out, my roommate going with when of them (being that she seems to spend most of her time at his apartment anyway) so I had the place to myself and decided it was time for more Young Justice, and ended up finishing the second season and consequently the show for the time being at least, until season 3 comes out some time next year. I definitely enjoyed it, and now I want to watch the other justice league animated shows that exist lol because I love my superheroes. I liked the plot, though I found it kind of amusing that they were handling this giant threat to earth when most of the Justice league's major players were totally off earth and indisposed, like did they have any contact with them during that time?? Their whole trial, or the small pieces we saw of it, was rather amusing for me to watch (especially their apparent having no idea what the concept of mind control is and their non-existent appeals process) from a legal perspective, lol. I liked the whole blue beetle storyline, I pretty much only know him from the like, single smallville episode he was in and that's not much so it was cool to see his character more. For most of the season I wasn't buying that they'd kill off one of their main characters, at least as far as the "deaths" they faked, but in the finale I did remember hearing that they had killed off (spoiler obviously) Wally West and his death felt much more legit all around, although probably sadder being that they were kind of teasing Artemis' life being in peril all season only for him to get killed instead. Aqualad going undercover was all sorts of awesome, as was their showdown battle at the summit between the light and the reach, where aqualad supposedly "dies" and then hologram him outs everything the light has been doing to betray the light (and vice versa to some extent) and Vandal Savage is like I HAVE NEVER BEEN BETRAYED THIS BADLY IN 50,000 YEARS OF LIVING because that was just amazing (and of course he comes back to life like two seconds later). So I basically just all around approved of the show and thoroughly enjoyed it. I guess it's back to The Keepers for now, though I may find something else to intersperse it with. It's a good show, it's just both heavy and dry which doesn't make it the best for always binging, but one of my podcasts is talking about it in next week's episode so I do want to finish it. And yeah, that was basically the rest of my night as I was also only my computer doing my normal computer stuff and reading fanfic which I'm still not at all caught up on. Oh, I should tell you I did get my LARC grade back, though I'm in no hurry to announce it because I was pretty thoroughly pissed off about it. I mean, it very clearly could've been worse, a B is not the end of the world, it just felt very frustrating in this particular circumstance given how much work I put into that class and how much it felt like our professor was not at all invested in the class and it was very much an afterthought to her actual law firm job, and like I got better grades in LARC last year with a(n objectively) better and harder professor, and a B ties con law from my first semester as the worst grade I've gotten in law school, so I'm not happy that now there will be two of them on my transcript (and 1 B+, but that's different). I know I'm probably overreacting to something that really doesn't matter that much at all, it just irks me and it makes me mad that it'll definitely make my GPA drop (though I'm not sure by how much) and probably make my ranking drop, even if only by 5% or so, putting me back in the top 15%. I was just so happy to be in the top 10% that dropping back to where I was after first year feels very frustrating. It's my second worse semester grade wise, just barely beating out my first semester (3 A-'s and a B versus 1 A, 2 A-'s, and a B) which is annoying in terms of progress (considering last semester I got 3 A's and 1 A-) but I guess it's bound to vary depending on what classes you take and how challenging they are. Like I said, I'm probably overreacting to what really doesn't mean much at all, I'd just hate to think a prospective employer would see that and think my legal writing skills are subpar because of it when I've been proven in actual real courtroom experience to have solid legal writing skills, which I of course worked very hard to get. Idk, it's just frustrating. I'm not sure what my GPA for the semester would be, probably somewhere around a 3.55 (given that my first semester GPA was a 3.5) which shouldn't bring down my overall GPA of 3.7 too much, maybe just to 3.67 or something, which hopefully won't kill my ranking all that much, but I was right on the border of 10% as is and the qualifying GPA normally goes up every semester so I kind of doubt I would hit it again. *sigh* idk, we'll see, speculating about it probably doesn't do any good, and I've clearly ranted about it for long enough here when that's not going to solve anything. It is what it is, and I'll deal. Worse things have happened to me grade wise (like the nightmare that was junior year of college). But yeah, that was pretty much my day. Now I just have 4 days (or 3 3/4, since I'll probably leave a little early on Friday to get to the airport in time) of work to get through until I have 2 weeks off in NY with my family and friends. I'm aware of my previous musings on here of how I romanticize going home to be better than it is in reality, but I'm still looking forward to it as some time off being that I pretty much jumped right into work this summer and I'm definitely feeling the lack of break. I'm hoping that will help with my overall feeling towards work, cuz it's not all that great right now, which doesn't bode well for my future in this business, especially if I end up wanting to work for this office and will undoubtedly be keeping a similar 9-5 5 days a week schedule year round. I guess at some point I'll have to get over it. This is long and it's late, I should go to bed now, so I guess that's what I'll do now. Goodnight peeps. Hope you had a good Memorial Day.

#daily journal #May 2017 #sigh #it's still May

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seriouslyhooked · 7 years

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So In Love (The CS Mixtape) Part 126/?

Series of CS oneshots inspired by music. Collection on FF Here.

A/N: Hey all! This is a modern AU drabble prompted by a follower who wanted ‘Danny’s Song’ (sung by the Swon Brothers) where Emma and Killian are newly weds who are really young (still in college) but are on the way to starting their family. It’s literally all fluff, but I hope you guys enjoy and thanks for reading!

Sitting in the waiting room of the doctor’s office, awaiting the chance to figure out if Emma’s hunch that she was expecting was true, Killian could barely wrap his mind around everything going on. He was elated, hopeful in a way that he couldn’t easily describe, though he also knew that this was a moment when fear could be understood. A baby, a new life to support and to care for, would be a major change, one neither he nor Emma had been expecting, but even if the timing wasn’t perfect, Killian couldn’t help but feel so incredibly happy.

Because the truth was that he loved Emma. He had been in love with Emma since the moment they met on the first day of classes freshman year. It was an adjustment, coming to America from a different country and starting anew. But in that time of darkness, in the midst of that uncertainty, there was a girl who was as beautiful as she was guarded. She also happened to be whip smart, far too good for him, and the funniest person he’d ever met. It was easy to outline the reasons why he’d fell for her, but that love only increased as time went on.

Emma’s origin story was a sorry one, and as soon as Killian discovered the full extent of what she’d missed out on, he made it his mission in life to make amends for all that Emma had gone through. She’d never had a place to belong? He’d help her find her home. She’d never had a family who wanted her? There was nothing in the world he wanted more than to stand at her side and see her happy.

Now more than three years later, Killian was truly blessed, because somehow Emma was his. She’d chosen him in return and there wasn’t a day that went by when Killian didn’t thank his lucky stars for that fact. Emma loved him just as much as he loved her, and in break from what most people would expect, they were already married. They hadn’t wanted to wait until they were done with school. It felt like a lifetime to them, waiting two more years. Honestly any amount of time was too long when you knew you’d found the one, and so they didn’t. Last summer they’d been married in the meadow not too far from school that Emma loved best in front of their friends and Killian’s brother. It was the single best day of his life and nothing could hold a candle to it, until the morning Emma told him her feeling under the weather and about the fact that she was late.

“Tell me it will all be okay.” Emma said the words from beside him and Killian turned to look at his wife. Her hand was already in his, her body hugging close to his chest as she molded to his side, but he could feel her anxiety, and instinct demanded that he ease it away.

“It’s going to be more than that, Emma. I know this wasn’t the plan. I know we both wanted a bit more stability before this, but I have to believe everything happens for a reason. Fate brought me you, and so I’ll never turn her down. Whatever the doctor says, we’re going to have each other, and someday, whether it’s months or years from now we’ll have that family we both want, and it’ll be the best thing in the world.”

Emma smiled, and though Killian could see some lingering worry, it was clear that his words were helping. Her hand made its way to his chest, just above his heart, and finally she exhaled, gearing herself up to talk to him.

“It’s just…” Killian moved one of his hands to cup her cheek and waited until her green eyes met his before he urged her on.

“Whatever it is you can tell me, Emma.”

“I never want to let our kids down. I want to be there – to really be there – and I want to do it right. I want them to know how much we love them and how we’ll always choose to be with them. What if it’s too soon? What if we screw up? We don’t know how to do this.”

Each one of her concerns latched onto his heart and it hurt, like a thorny prick against his chest, but it was always better to see inside his Swan’s heart. Emma trusted him, and that was one of the greatest gifts she’d ever bestowed on him. It was his job then to make her see that there was hope, even through the fear.

“You are the smartest, kindest, most fiercely determined person I have ever met, Emma. Everything you are, everything you’ve been through – that we’ve been through together – it’s given you the answers already. We’re never going to know exactly what to do. We’ll never get it perfect, but there is no doubt in mind that our kids will know love. With a mother like you, they’ll have the best. Belonging to you is a miracle, Emma, and any child of ours will know that.”

Killian didn’t know what he expected from her, but it wasn’t the kiss that he received, a searing one meant to show him how much Emma needed him and how much he meant to her. In that moment the waiting room faded away. There was only Emma, and the possibility that soon their life and their love would to bring something all together too beautiful to describe into this world.

“I love you.”

Her whispered words were simple in the face of all of his, but they brought a genuine smile to Killian’s face. All this time later and there was still nothing like knowing he had Emma’s heart. It filled him up with purpose, and this feeling like everything truly would work out in the end. She was his hope and his light, and the funny thing was she seemed to think it was the other way around. She always saw the best in him, and it was her belief that motivated him to be better in every way.

“Emma Jones?” The nurse called from the doorway and Emma jumped as Killian held her in place. He gently brought her hand that he was holding to his lips and pressed a kiss there.

“Whatever happens, love, know nothing in this world makes me happier than you.” Emma whispered that it was the same for her as they got up and moved together behind the nurse.

The appointment was pretty typical to start, just getting Emma’s vitals and such, but when the doctor came in and the truth came out, that they were expecting a baby in about six months time, Killian couldn’t help but let his joy be known. There were tears in his eyes, and he wasn’t too proud to let them fall when Emma decided to get an ultrasound and they heard the heart beat of that precious little boy or girl.

“We did this,” Emma said, clearly as blown away by their tiny miracle as he was.

“Aye, love.”

“I love them so much already.”

Killian heard the warm reverberations of Emma’s joy in her tone. There were tears in her eyes too, but there was also so much more. She looked lost almost, caught in the same fantasies he was having of little girls with their mother’s blonde hair and knowing eyes, and boys that looked like him, causing mischief but always vowing to protect the people they loved most.

He knew Emma was awaiting some sort of reply from him. Killian could see it in her beautiful face as she looked up at him and he tried to find his own that could do this feeling justice, yet he was speechless. It was unexpected, and this little boy or girl would be facing some interesting times with them ahead, but hell if Killian could regret a single part of this. This was the epitome of happiness. This was love made real. It was him and Emma’s passion and need for each other that made this possible. They’d started a family a family he would cherish and protect and live for all the days of his life.

“You’ve given me everything, love. Everything and more.” Killian pressed a kiss to her forehead and continued to hold onto Emma, from when the appointment ended until they were back in their little apartment set to make plans.

As expected, Emma was the picture of ability and capacity. She set forth a plan and in the course of one afternoon she’d gotten them on a track to not only graduate early (so that both of them would have their degrees by the time the baby was born) but to find a place to live once they were done here. They had a lot of questions to consider and not the least of them was where to call their home.

But when the sun set on this day, and Killian’s ability to wait any longer was tired out, he pulled his lovely wife into his arms and brought her back to bed, wanting and needing to celebrate this news in the way that only the two of them could. And later on, when the two of them were wrapped up in each other in the bed they shared, Killian told Emma the absolute truth: that there were no limits to the love between them, and that he was so in love with her and so devoted to their family that nothing could ever come between them.

………..

People smile and tell me I'm the lucky one, And we've just begun. Think I'm gonna have a son. He will be like she and me, free as a dove, Conceived in love. The sun is gonna shine above.

And even though we ain't got money, I'm so in love with you honey, And everything will bring a chain of love. And in the morning, when I rise, You bring a tear of joy to my eyes And tell me everything is gonna be alright.

Seems as though, a month ago, I was Beta-Chi, Never got high. And oh I was a sorry guy. And now I smile and face a girl that shares my name. Now I'm through with the game. This boy will never be the same.

Love a girl who holds the world in a paper cup. And drink it up. Love her and she'll bring you luck. And if you find she helps your mind, buddy take her home. Oh don't you live alone. Try to earn what lovers own.

Even though we ain't got money, I'm so in love with you, honey, And everything will bring a chain of love. And in the morning, when I rise, You bring a tear of joy to my eyes And tell me everything is gonna be alright.

Post-Note: So I just want to thank my reader for being so kind and patient as I worked to find the muse for this story. I really liked the idea of a younger Emma and Killian starting a family, and though it took some time to figure out how I wanted to express that, I hope I did your vision justice. Also thank you to everyone else for reading as well and I hope you all have a lovely rest of your day!

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10,Part 11, Part 12,Part 13, Part 14, Part 15, Part 16, Part 17, Part 18, Part 19, Part 20, Part 21, Part 22, Part 23, Part 24, Part 25, Part 26, Part 27, Part 28, Part 29, Part 30, Part 31, Part 32, Part 33, Part 34, Part 35, Part 36, Part 37, Part 38, Part 39, Part 40, Part 41, Part 42, Part 43, Part 44, Part 45, Part 46, Part 47, Part 48, Part 49, Part 50, Part 51, Part 52, Part 53, Part 54, Part 55, Part 56, Part 57, Part 58, Part 59, Part 60, Part 61, Part 62, Part 63, Part 64, Part 65, Part 66, Part 67, Part 68, Part 69, Part 70, Part 71, Part 72, Part 73, Part 74, Part 75, Part 76, Part 77, Part 78, Part 79, Part 80, Part 81, Part 82, Part 83, Part 84, Part 85, Part 86, Part 87, Part 88, Part 89, Part 90, Part 91, Part 92, Part 93, Part 94, Part 95, Part 96, Part 97, Part 98, Part 99, Part 100, Part 101, Part 102, Part 103, Part 104, Part 105, Part 106, Part 107, Part 108, Part 109, Part 110,Part 111, Part 112, Part 113, Part 114, Part 115, Part 116, Part 117, Part 118, Part 119,Part 120, Part 121, Part 122, Part 123, Part 124, Part 125

#captain swan #captain swan fic #captain swan ff #captain swan au #modern au #cs fic #cs ff #cs fluff #cs baby #emma swan #killian jones #captain swan mixtape #cs mixtape #the captain swan mixtape #cs drabble #so in love

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ntandosindanesays · 7 years

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On the Occasion of Unisa’s Decoloniality Summer School

The November 2015 – August 2016 Experience. Our brutal fight against the Outsourcing of Unisa’s vulnerable and exploited black workers.

The calling of student reflections in forums such as these ones is almost an anomaly in our collective reality of post-colonial pedagogies. We have all become accustomed to, or gotten used to, what other writers know as banking education. This is, the grouping of academics, meeting over a period of two weeks, presenting their papers to a group of students, who then receive these presentations and internalize them without question or giving an input. The method of banking education places the teacher at the centre of education. The teacher researches, puts information together and delivers it as it is, to the student. The student, is a mere receiver of information. What he/she receives, can be strongly likened to the gospel of Jesus Christ of Nazareth; “Then Jesus answered; I am the way, the truth and life.” (John 14:6). Who, among his followers were able to stand and dispute this statement? In the same fashion; the learner is unable to dispute any of the teachings by the teacher.

To be given this 2-hour slot therefore; breaks this “Jesus and discipleship” method of banking education. I am certain, that I speak for all students who are here, both on the panel and as well as the audience, when I say that we are thankful that Unisa’s Summer School is not in the habit of perpetuating a Jesus type of pedagogy.

I have written on this topic quite extensively over the past few months, and every time I am given an opportunity to speak about it, I relish the chance to reflect on a struggle that has decisively defined my student activism over the past two years or so. From this alone, one has grown, both in my personal life and as well as my public role as a student leader and an agent of social justice. There are so many lessons that I wish to share. All of these lessons are a product of a lived experience. They are not theories from books nor are they random musings of elitist imaginations on what the struggle is and what it isn’t.

At this Summer school, Professor Sphamandla Zondi, whom I hardly ever agree with, makes a very neat argument that captures my attention. He argues that the sequence of things as they are, the setting of time, alphabets, numbers and the rest is deliberately put in place to achieve the objective or desires of those who designed the system in the first place. At a similar platform almost two years ago, the good Prof made a similar observation. In the latter, he taught the audience that the elevation of literature to a higher status than Orature, was done with the intent to deliberately undermine and relegate indigenous knowledge systems. On these two teachings alone, I agree fully with the good prof. This brings me to the first lesson that is to be drawn from the insourcing struggle.

The fact that some people are poor and that some people are rich is the basis of my activism. Regardless of our collective ideological inclination or political persuasion, it was inherent and instinctive from all cadres that the distinction between the poor and the rich was a problem. To move further, it was our conviction that this was not an accident of history nor was it in any way natural. Towards the end of the year 2015, shortly after the hype of #FeesMustFall protest at the Union building in Pretoria, my comrades and I met a Martha Ndala(and this is her real name) at Unisa’s main campus. In one light-hearted conversation, we learned that she had been a cleaner at the university for more than 29 years. We further learned that she was earning a salary of R3500. She says to us that when she arrived in this university, the current Vice-Chancellor was still a junior lecturer. She tells a story of how she has watched the Vice-Chancellor develop from being a committed young academic in the college of human sciences, right up to the first office in the university.

See, using Prof Zondi’s analogy of orders, sequences and systems, we can boldly say that both Mama Martha Ndala and as well as Professor Makhanya contributed equally, for the past 3 decades or so, into building this university to what it currently is. However, this is bizarre. The state of coloniality, its oppressive pedagogies and hegemonic orders teach us that because Mama Martha does not have a matric certificate, because Mama Martha comes from an impoverished family and because she is black, she is not worthy of getting a salary proportional to that of Professor Mandla Makhanya.

The orders, sequences and the like, have us to believe that the job of keeping the university clean is lowly and not worth of any serious recognition, let alone a decent salary. Colonial superstructures like universities are designed to entrench and extensively perpetuate the anomaly of the rich and the poor. With this realization, we were in the mood to prove a point. The point that the price of bread does not discriminate between Mama Martha and Prof Makhanya. We wanted to prove a point that the accumulated value of both their labour was equal and that their salaries should be proportional to each other. We were itching to prove that both their competencies were crucial to the smooth running of this institution and as well as its development. Of course, we engaged management calmly and wanted to reach a negotiated settlement, but the tremendous desire to prove this point led us to the streets. We figured that this could only be proven by asking Mama Martha and all her colleagues to withdraw their labour indefinitely. We went further went to persuade Security workers, Garden workers, Cafeteria workers and all other outsourced employees to also withdraw their labour. Within a week, Unisa was in a state of Chaos. Its premises, including Professor Makhanya’s office, were messy. The assets of the university were vulnerable to theft. The Garden and landscaping was disorderly. And so on and so forth.

The university responded the only way it has been designed to respond. By that time of the year we were already subjected to interdicts, suspensions and numerous arrests. By this, we knew that we had succeeded in proving our point.

A liberational pedagogy, as a contradiction to these colonized spaces, dictates that we need to move beyond just the epistemic question when speaking unto decolonizing, intersectionality and the like. Epistemic disobedience, is the practical enactment of what we have conceived to be true and just. This brings me to the next lesson.

The discourse is littered with the scum of the worst type of academic exercises. We had to grapple with, and eventually negotiate into understanding, the glaring theory-praxis dissonance in the discourse. This is, from all sides.

On the one hand, you had one massive in-house trade union, with a very proud history of advancing labour and working-class struggles without fear or favour. Naturally, you would expect this large trade union to automatically identify with the struggle against outsourcing. These expectations do not only stem from their proud history but also the equally gigantic intellectual work done by some of its prominent leaders of the yester years. You know, the Marxist-Leninist writings. I am talking about those verbose teachings on the labour theory of value, the class struggle, the dictatorship of the proletariat, the conception of the state as an instrument of class oppression and the subsequent need for this state to be smashed, and so on and so forth. You know those things? Yes. When the union leaders produce volumes of work preaching about these things, one will be convinced that their hearts are at the right place and that instinctively, theirs would be align the union to any struggle that seeks to advance a genuine worker’s course. THEY DID NOT. Instead, they wrote communique after communique to their members, and love letters to the entire university community, claiming that students were; “out of order for wanting to advance a struggle that is not theirs, this nothing but a ploy to grandstand and score cheap political points.” We are not really gutted by this gutter type of pettiness, we are rather appalled by the disconnect between theory and praxis. We preach this wonderful gospel and a type of Marxism that would ordinarily inspire masses into action but this theory does nothing to us. We remain static and reject anything that speaks unto action. In so far as this presentation is concerned, I should not be construed as one who is advocating for Marxism or whatever ideology. That is a discussion for another Summer School. The space here is; Marxism inspired various revolutions around the world. In the context of its resident theorists in the context of the Insourcing struggle it did completely nothing.

On the other hand, you had Unisa academics. For sure, they are not too big on Marxism. Most of them are into a newer brand theorising. They know it better than I do. I cannot exactly put a finger on it and hence do not have a name for it. I hope one will not be blamed for this type of ignorance. Of course they articulate their position quite eloquently, we see them on TV, we see them mainly on Facebook too. They are a powerful bunch. The only two things I know about this theorising is that it is black-people centred and that is calls for the ending of the world as we know it. Go figure. I also happen to know that round about this time of the year last year, when we were getting beaten by bouncers on campus and thrown into the park (outside Unisa premises) this group of academics was attending a certain summer school and doing more theorising. Am I upset by this? Of course I am not. I am rather baffled by this endless theorising that does not light the spark for meaningful action. Because we are students, we continue, to this day, to probe some of them on this theory-praxis dissonance. To our dismay, to these academics the so-called epistemic war is in itself worthy to be classified as action.

This lesson was an eye-opener. Theory does not always lead to action. Theory without action remains useless. It certainly did very little to ensure that Unisa’s exploited black workers are insourced. Except of course, for showing some salty solidarity on Facebook. It may seem like they have a case to answer but I do not think they do. Especially where consciousness is concerned, everything done is done deliberately.

During the course of this Summer school, we also studied Amilca Cabral’s Weapon of Theory. Of course, we focused on the predicament facing Africa. I wish to touch on one observation made by comrade Cabral.

“We do not think we will shock this assembly by stating that the only effective way of definitively fulfilling the aspirations of the peoples, that is to say of attaining national liberation, is by armed struggle. This is the great lesson which the contemporary history of liberation struggle teaches all those who are truly committed to the effort of liberating their peoples.”

This brings me to the third, and final lesson, for purposes of this presentation. One of the reasons why we were arrested and suspended on so many occasions as individuals and as a group was that our tactics had the tendency to invite violence and mayhem to the campus. Although no responsibility was taken by either the leadership or the workers themselves, on the 3rd of March 2016, buildings were vandalized, cars were burnt and badly damaged, people were physically assaulted and many other similar atrocities were committed. This happens against the backdrop of a Unisa management that had reneged on its part of the signed agreement with the workers. Those of us who were there on that day will never forget it till we go to the grave.

After the 3rd of March, we began receiving messages of condemnation from even our closest friends and allies. Acts of violence were condemned in the strongest sense of the word. My own parents weighed in quite heavily on this matter. This entices a discussion unto the question of violence. Fellow Communists continue to claim to have a healthy discourse on violence but an epistemic community around this subject needs to be broadened.

The entire war against outsourcing might not constitute a comprehensive move towards a decolonized university but definitely succeeds to move an inch in displacing the colonial understanding of roles in a university, (Cleaner vs Vice Chancellor).

Now, when there’s a protracted move to completely rid the university of its colonial face and schematic composition, will this be a peaceful and mosque process?

Is it not a given that those who are serious about decolonizing need to be at peace, at least, with the fact that we must destroy in order to rebuild?

Isn’t it that those who reform, transform, reshape and reshift the structure, do this so behalf of the original builders of the structure?

What does the condemnation of violence say about our readiness to engage in a revolution? That is; if our understanding of a revolution as a complete overthrow of the oppressive anti-black and Global Capital system. Unless of course, if decolonizing and the revolution is a mere academic exercise.

ENDS. [18-01-2017]

#OutsourcingMustFall

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adambstingus · 5 years

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Parkland Teenagers Taking on the Worldand Winning

We haven’t heard the last from survivors of the deadly February school shooting in Parkland, Florida. Dozens of the high school students who were thrust into a mortality crisis before they could order a beer at a bar have graduated from teenage angst to social justice, and they’re continuing to sing truth to power while pulling together to help one another to heal.

Recently, Sawyer Garrity and Andrea Pena, the teenage songsters who wrote “Shine,” the anthem of their movement #MSDstrong, performed in Washington, D.C., at the Fords Theater annual gala. They sang directly to Vice President Pence and FLOTUS, demanding change in gun laws. Then they joined a chorus of classmates from Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School to sing at the New York Public Theater’s annual gala, following the chorus’ surprise appearance at the Tony Awards that won them a rousing standing ovation.

The musical partners invited me later into their pocket-sized hotel room in Times Square, aghast at the shrinkage of space in our island city.

“Is this what a New York apartment looks like?”

For months, the dominant emotion in their lives was sadness. Then anger: “We’ve gone through an experience that someone who’s 80 might not have gotten close to going through,” exclaimed Sawyer, “so they can’t lecture us on what gun laws should be because they haven’t gone through this!” She plucks at the strings in her jeans. “But lately, I’ve been feeling inspired.”

And as of this week, the two drama students have started volunteering at Camp Shine, a ground-breaking summer camp program that families of the school have launched to help the children heal through the arts. “We had to find a way to keep these kids together,” says Wendy Simon Garrity, mother of Sawyer.

Her instinct was spot-on. Children of trauma most often shut down; they can’t express their feelings, so they withdraw into numbness, or wrestle with the inner crisis of fight or flight. When the families connected with Jessica Asch, a board-certified trauma therapist at New York University, she endorsed their hunch.

“The antidote to trauma is community,” Asch believes. “We have to meet these kids where they are and keep them together.” Her broad experience in working with adolescents, veterans, and other PTSD sufferers including Holocaust survivors has shown her how effective it is to use various art therapies to encourage trauma victims to be in touch with their real feelings and to find support in the embrace of their fellow survivors.

“‘In the beginning, the only people who supported the civil rights movement were a few whites and mostly African Americans,’ Sawyer said. ‘It was them against the world. And that’s how it feels—it’s just us teenagers against the world.’”

“Parkland has had so much media attention, these kids haven’t had an opportunity to be messy, they’ve been so busy performing,” for their cause, says the psychologist. An academic research study will be conducted on the Parkland program by the trauma center at University of Miami. The long-range hope is it will result in a curriculum that can be made available to other communities shaken by their children’s exposure to violent death.

At the camp, Garrity and Pena are joined by 35 students, six of them among the wounded, who are being guided in music therapy, art, drama, and storytelling and other relevant artistic expressions such as graffiti and photography that are therapeutic for victims of trauma. Their charity, Shine MSD, has raised just enough money to provide a two-week camp. They hope to attract donors who will fund another month of the camp to reach all the traumatized students. The program is designed by some of the nation’s leading creative arts therapists, and it is thus far supported by the royalty fees earned by their song “Shine” on iTunes, and from donations by a few celebrity benefactors like Miley Cyrus.

The two girls told me the story of how their celebrated anthem came to be.

Last Valentine’s Day had started out for 15-year-old Andrea Pena in an exchange of gifts with her boyfriend. At school everyone was cracking jokes about being single, passing around a box of Pringles and saying, “I’m a single pringle.” When a weird second fire alarm sent her and Sawyer and scores of kids and adults outdoors, the girls joked, “Oh, Culinary burned down,” referring to kids in the Food Services department who often burn while they learn.

The words “Code Red” drove them back inside. Sawyer Garrity, then 16 and all of 5-foot-1, jumped over a table to get into an office in the Drama Department that turned out to be full of windows. For the next hour and half, she and Andrea and 10 others crouched beneath a desk while hearing the shots and screams of friends’, sounds that would never be muted in their minds. Seventeen people, including teachers, lay dead.

I asked them, as many do, “Do you think you can, through your art and music, convey the reality to others that his might happen to you, to your school, to your children?” Sawyer replied solemnly, “I don’t think we could ever push the feelings that we felt onto other people. No one can relate unless it’s happened to you or to your child.” Both girls admitted that when their drama teacher, Melody Herzfeld, tried before the shooting to rehearse them into imagining how they should respond to a gunman’s attack, they paid no attention.

“Oh, it’s never going to happen here,” they thought.

The first two days after the massacre, the girls had spent in solitary anguish, slouched in their separate homes, Andrea bent over her Yamaha keyboard (“I’ve never had a big fancy piano”), Sawyer glumly picking at her guitar. She has been writing songs since she was 6 years old. Her father, Joe Garrity, told me he’d scratch his head when his little daughter would emerge from her bedroom and say, “I’ve got the bridge!” But Sawyer, who will be a senior this fall, admitted to me that she had never taken her guitar seriously until she faced a mortality crisis decades before she was ready to cope. The two classmates began texting each other.

“We have to do something,” Sawyer wrote.

Andrea, a rising junior, fiddled around with a few chords on her keyboard. “This could be something,” she thought. She didn’t dare voice the intention of writing a song; she had never done that before. So she sent Sawyer a voice memo of a riff. It touched something in the baby-faced girl with spigots of curls falling over her eyes. Sawyer played those chords again and again until some lyrics popped into her mind.

“You, you threw my city away…”

She texted them back to Andrea, the granddaughter of people who fled Castro’s Cuba and found refuge in Puerto Rico (though young Andrea never wanted to learn Spanish when her kindergarten friends in Florida teased her for her accent).

Andrea sent another voice memo, more chords. Sawyer’s sorrow suddenly released a powerful chorus of resistance:

You’re not gonna knock us down

We’ll get back up again

You may have hurt us

But I promise we’ll be stronger

A couple of days later, they got together and finished off the song as if it all came naturally.

They first shared “Shine” with the public at a town hall a week after the massacre. With 15 minutes to teach the lyrics to a chorus before performing, they weren’t even aware that CNN would be broadcasting their song to untold millions around the world, beyond the 7,000 in their audience. But they had been well taught how to hold presence during a performance. And they had words ready to stake their claim to being, not just authentic, but real:

We’re, we’re gonna stand tall,

Gonna raise up our voices so we never, ever fall

We’re done with all your little games

We’re tired of hearing that we’re too young to ever make a change.

The audience response was rapturous. But the most touching moment for the girls came when the news anchor of CNN, Jake Tapper, came down to their dressing room and told them, “That was the most moving song I’ve ever heard.”

Belonging to a rather nondescript new generation, the girls told me they don’t even know what their “name” means—“It’s just a letter. Gen Z.”

I suggested they should be called Gen Now.

“I like that,” Andrea said. Sawyer chimed in: “I like that one.”

They recalled Jimmy Fallon saying at the school’s graduation ceremony, “Everyone’s saying you guys are the future, but I feel like you guys are the present.” They liked that, too. I proposed they might belong to a Third Culture generation.

“I definitely think so,“ Sawyer said. “Not just because of our awareness of gun violence, but also the way we’ve been speaking up for Black Lives Matter and LGBT rights and all. We’re so open to new culture now and more willing to listen—and we’re not as closed off and ignorant about other people. It’s like we’re coming together and embracing each other more than anything before.”

But of course, it’s not unlike anything that came before. And the girls have recently recognized that—it’s called the civil rights movement. And they want to build on it.

“In the beginning, the only people who supported the civil rights movement were a few whites and mostly African Americans,” Sawyer said. “It was them against the world. And that’s how it feels right now—it’s just us teenagers against the world.”

But they both notice more and more adults coming to their performances and wanting to learn from them, just as they find themselves learning from their parents’ generation and their fearless protests against the Vietnam War. “There was nothing ever like that before, where young people and then people in general were coming together and standing together,” Sawyer mused. “So powerful.”

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/parkland-teenagers-taking-on-the-worldand-winning/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/182923245687

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samanthasroberts · 5 years

Text

Parkland Teenagers Taking on the Worldand Winning

The musical partners invited me later into their pocket-sized hotel room in Times Square, aghast at the shrinkage of space in our island city.

“Is this what a New York apartment looks like?”

The two girls told me the story of how their celebrated anthem came to be.

“Oh, it’s never going to happen here,” they thought.

“We have to do something,” Sawyer wrote.

“You, you threw my city away…”

Andrea sent another voice memo, more chords. Sawyer’s sorrow suddenly released a powerful chorus of resistance:

You’re not gonna knock us down

We’ll get back up again

You may have hurt us

But I promise we’ll be stronger

A couple of days later, they got together and finished off the song as if it all came naturally.

We’re, we’re gonna stand tall,

Gonna raise up our voices so we never, ever fall

We’re done with all your little games

We’re tired of hearing that we’re too young to ever make a change.

Belonging to a rather nondescript new generation, the girls told me they don’t even know what their “name” means—“It’s just a letter. Gen Z.”

I suggested they should be called Gen Now.

“I like that,” Andrea said. Sawyer chimed in: “I like that one.”

But of course, it’s not unlike anything that came before. And the girls have recently recognized that—it’s called the civil rights movement. And they want to build on it.

Source: http://allofbeer.com/parkland-teenagers-taking-on-the-worldand-winning/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2019/02/19/parkland-teenagers-taking-on-the-worldand-winning/

0 notes

allofbeercom · 5 years

Text

Parkland Teenagers Taking on the Worldand Winning

The musical partners invited me later into their pocket-sized hotel room in Times Square, aghast at the shrinkage of space in our island city.

“Is this what a New York apartment looks like?”

The two girls told me the story of how their celebrated anthem came to be.

“Oh, it’s never going to happen here,” they thought.

“We have to do something,” Sawyer wrote.

“You, you threw my city away…”

Andrea sent another voice memo, more chords. Sawyer’s sorrow suddenly released a powerful chorus of resistance:

You’re not gonna knock us down

We’ll get back up again

You may have hurt us

But I promise we’ll be stronger

A couple of days later, they got together and finished off the song as if it all came naturally.

We’re, we’re gonna stand tall,

Gonna raise up our voices so we never, ever fall

We’re done with all your little games

We’re tired of hearing that we’re too young to ever make a change.

Belonging to a rather nondescript new generation, the girls told me they don’t even know what their “name” means—“It’s just a letter. Gen Z.”

I suggested they should be called Gen Now.

“I like that,” Andrea said. Sawyer chimed in: “I like that one.”

But of course, it’s not unlike anything that came before. And the girls have recently recognized that—it’s called the civil rights movement. And they want to build on it.

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/parkland-teenagers-taking-on-the-worldand-winning/

0 notes

edmundminoredinfilm · 6 years

Text

Final rankings and a few sentences about every 2017 movie I saw...

1. THE SHAPE OF WATER - The Academy owes Guillermo del Toro big time after it overlooked his 2006 masterpiece Pan’s Labyrinth. Hopefully justice prevails and del Toro takes home both Best Picture and Best Director. This movie is a perfect fairy tale.

2. BABY DRIVER - I don’t even know how to say how good this movie was in just a sentence or two so instead I’ll throw a curveball: “Was He Slow?” should have been nominated for Best Original Song.

3. DUNKIRK - Never has a movie with such little dialogue emotionally moved me the way Dunkirk did. On top of that, the timeline structure is fantastic, Hans Zimmer kills it and all the sound is majorly on point in this one.

4. A GHOST STORY - Did it not get award season love because of its minuscule budget, summer release date or Casey Affleck? I’m sure it’s a combination of the three but it deserved several nominations and a win for its cinematography.

5. THE FLORIDA PROJECT - The most surprising snub in the Best Picture category. If Willem Dafoe wins for Supporting Actor, it isn’t just the Academy making up for Florida’s lack of nominations, he was really good.

6. CALL ME BY YOUR NAME - The cinematography and musical choices remind me a ton of The Graduate. The parallels to The Graduate don’t stop there though: thematically CMBYN is The Graduate for 2018 teenagers, despite being set in the 1980’s.

7. MUDBOUND - I’m opposed to nominating Netflix movies for Oscars but if you’re going to nominate them, this is the movie to nominate. Also, if there were an ensemble acting award this would definitely be in the top three of the year.

8. THREE BILLBOARDS OUTSIDE EBBING, MISSOURI - Frances McDormand is overwhelmingly good, as are Woody Harrelson and Sam Rockwell. The screenplay is great. I understand that some have ideological issues with the film, and I’m not say that I don’t, but regardless of the film’s worldview, it is still so well put together.

9. PHANTOM THREAD - The production design is wonderful. The Academy certainly nominated the wrong actress from this movie though, snubbing Vicky Krieps and nominating Lesley Manville, who wasn’t bad but I didn’t think was anything special.

10. THE DARKEST HOUR - My expectations were low but I was blown away by the cinematography and on the edge of my seat the whole movie. Also, I would say you can sign me up to watch any movie with Lily James, but she’s in the upcoming Mamma Mia sequel...

11. BLADE RUNNER 2049 - The best sci-fi movie since Mad Max and a worthy follow up to the original Blade Runner, one of the best science fiction movies ever.

12. COCO - I ugly cried in a way only Pixar can make me do.

13. LADY BIRD - A strong script and a good movie. My hat is off to Greta Gerwig, who not only captured the Catholic high school environment so well, but also has made the first great period piece of the early 2000′s.

14. HOSTILES - Christian Bale’s performance in this definitely was top 5 for male leads this year. Even though it wasn’t seen by lots of people, I’m surprised by this snub since James Franco’s bid for a nomination fell short because of allegations.

15. GET OUT - One of the most original concepts of the year for a movie. More so than any other movie this year, Get Out has me excited for what its director and writer, Jordan Peele, might do next.

16. THE DISASTER ARTIST - The Franco allegations did this one in, but it certainly deserved that nomination for Adapted Screenplay, and probably a nomination for James Franco.

17. MOLLY’S GAME - The dialogue is fantastic, but I know that’s not going to get you to go out and see this. Here’s what will: Michael Cera plays a high stakes poker player in it.

18. LOVING VINCENT - The flawlessness of the animation isn’t just impressive because it’s beautiful, it’s also impressive because of the direction it must have taken to get the 125 painters that worked on it on the same page. Coco is fantastic and deserving of the Animated Picture Award, but it’s a bit sad such a unique movie won’t win Animated Picture this year.

19. I, TONYA - Margot Robbie is excellent and the movie is really funny. However, I think she is done a disservice by having to play both 23 year-old Tonya and 15 year-old Tonya; she just seemed to old to play the latter.

20. THE MEYEROWITZ STORIES - Adam Sandler is particularly good in this one. I also thought “Genius Girl” should have gotten some consideration for Original Song, if we’re nominating Netflix movies for Oscars.

21. THE BEGUILED - A bit surprised that Sofia Coppola didn’t get any love during awards season but that doesn’t mean this movie wasn’t good. The movie has great ensemble acting and chilling cinematography.

22. LOGAN - The Academy got the nomination that this movie deserved wrong: while the screenplay didn’t deserve its nomination, Dafne Keen, who plays the young girl, X-23, ought have been nominated for supporting actress. The screenplay doesn’t deserve the nomination because the dialogue is nothing overwhelming and, while the movie may break barriers for super hero movies, so much of it has been seen before, especially an old guy that everyone used to love but now he’s a jerk who is addicted to boozing. I’ve seen it before.

23. KONG: SKULL ISLAND - My favorite “popcorn movie” of the year. Explosions and monsters make for a fun movie here, and while the visuals effects are good, they aren’t Shape of Water level good (The Academy makes another mistake).

24. FILM STARS DON’T DIE IN LIVERPOOL - Good acting from Annette Bening and Jamie Bell is a bit wasted in this movie as the screenplay fails to really show why Gloria Graham’s last few years merit a feature length film.

25. GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY: VOL 2 - Another good “popcorn movie.” Unsurprisingly good soundtrack and one of the best PG-13 Marvel movies since Tobey McGuire stopped being Spider-Man.

26. ALL THE MONEY IN THE WORLD - Christopher Plummer’s nomination is an absolute virtue signaling joke by the Academy. That said, it’s a decent movie if you’re looking for a thrill.

27. THE BIG SICK - It’s a great real life story and a good movie, but this was one of the most overrated pictures of 2017. Why would we start giving Judd Apatow-produced movies Oscar nominations now when we overlooked far better movies like Funny People and Forgetting Sarah Marshall?

28. LEGO BATMAN - I am so ****ing mad that Boss Baby is nominated for Animated Picture instead of this Batman movie, a movie we desperately needed after Batman v. Superman.

29. ROMAN J. ISRAEL ESQ. - Denzel’s acting is good, but not Oscar-nominated good in this movie. Also, the dialogue is fine but lacks what you might expect from a legal drama billing top talent like Denzel and Colin Farrell.

30. WONDER WOMAN - It has an OK story but I was underwhelmed by the special effects and I expect top notch ones from a movie like this.

31. SPIDER-MAN: HOMECOMING - It’s not Tobey McGuire, and that’s a bummer, but it’s also not Andrew Garfield, and that’s a good thing.

32. STAR WARS: THE LAST JEDI - Put great special effects and the Star Wars name on any average plot with pretty bad acting and watch the profits flow in.

33. WONDER WHEEL - It is a visually beautiful recreation of 1950’s Coney Island. Other than that, the film features a wide range of really good to pretty bad acting and Woody Allen’s most tone deaf screenplay to date (and I am a fan of lots of his movies).

34. THE POST - No one would accuse it of being All the President’s Men or Spotlight, but, given its nominations I guess some thought it was a good journalism movie? Yawn.

35. BEAUTY AND THE BEAST - It was pretty to look at?

36. BOSS BABY - See Lego Batman.

37. MURDER ON THE ORIENT EXPRESS - Michelle Pfeiffer really deserves a Razzie for this one. The ending implied a sequel would be coming, but I don’t think anyone wants that.

38. PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN 5 - I didn’t even bother to Google what the real name of this movie was. I forget everything about this movie that I saw only about half a year ago; that is probably a good thing.

#oscars #movies #2017 #2018 #90th academy awards #academy awards #baby driver #shape of water #three billboards outside ebbing missouri #call me by your name

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crocifixio · 6 years

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Bakun Shake

I remember the precise moment. It was the perfect marriage proposal photo op.

Amidst strobic rays of the midday sun from the intermittent play of clouds, on top of the iconic Mt Tenglawan carrot rock, a young girl sits knees down with her head buried in both hands, shoulders bouncing from helpless, emotional sobs. A few feet below, a fine young gentleman projecting gallantry in his half-kneel stance reaches out to her in dismal plea to take his offer. A steel crucifix rises above the silhouetted couple, the majestic Cordillera range is the backdrop.

Picture perfect, save for the fact that the two individuals were really not what you would call, well, a couple.

Down by the lower ledge, Team Alabok is caught in an awkward, suspended warp. Apparently, Rean- who was the aforementioned fine young gentleman had a wife who was not happy with the scenery. He had rushed in a selfless attempt to assist Mayeh down from the rock. Mayeh had suddenly let out an emotional stream upon reaching the top of the rock and Rean was the nearest who could help her. As to why Mayeh had cried – either from the difficulty of the ascent or from a swift wave of vertigo, we would never know.

“Ma’am, kunan natin picture si ser kunyare nagpo propose.. di ba yan ang mabenta sa FB? Daming likes nyan! Ok lang ba ma’am?’” quipped Kelvin, the one team member who had launched a thousand witty lines for the entire duration of the Bakun Trio climb. Silence broken, the affair turned into one raucous laughter.

I could not fathom how one year had redefined the demographics of an organized climb. Just a year prior, the median age group I was with during the Akiki-Tawangan hike was in the high thirties. For this summer climb that I joined, I was already the oldest at 36 years of age. We had jumped onboard a DIY-KBB endeavor, almost entirely unfamiliar with each other. Roy Gella had spearheaded the event, and in a tireless effort to replace last minute cancellations (mostly those who were active in the private chatrooms), had trimmed down the members to what we would eventually call Team Alabok.

Ours was a cold beginning, in spite of the warm ride courtesy of the bus aircon’s breakdown right when we left the Cubao Victory Liner terminal. We did not really ‘hit it off right from the start’, so to speak. We picked up one Rupert Arceo from Baguio, and a certain mountain biker by the name of Adriel Paglinawan along the trail going to Mt Lobo, our first mountain. Only on top of Mt Lobo did we truly get to let go all pretensions and become comfortable with one another. One look at the smiles on our faces in the group summit photo and you could say that we had known each other for a long time. But Adriel would digress. He would always consider himself as adopted, not knowing he was as bonafide as everyone else. For what it’s worth, he could have been the catalyst that shaped the friendship that would define the whole sortie. Everyone just started talking when he came on board.

One summit down, two more to go. I was in no rush to climb down, and so were Mayeh, Deya and Charles. We shared a lot of talks on the long breaks during the descent, and prior that last hanging bridge we also shared the same moment of that first glimpse of the dreamy town of Bakun - a mesmerizing hub of a plateau sitting in the midst of majestic geological wonders that seem to have popped out from the pages of The Hobbit. Some lady we passed by appeared to have been unmoved by all our manifestations of awe. She was not having it, and outright dismissed our excited admiration of her town. We were told that the scenery we were having was meager at best, (‘hindi pa po malinaw yang view na yan..’) for a haze from a recent forest fire was still lingering by the rock faces, and that the townsfolk were praying for rain days before to wash out that haze in time for our arrival!

The same sentiment was to be repeated by another guide on the way to Mt Tenglawan by the following day. Mt Tenglawan, which, by the way was a different beast altogether than Mt Lobo from the previous day, prompted us to start an hour earlier than originally planned. And there was justice to that move. As the town of Bakun sits on a plateau, one had to contend with the fact that nearby mountains had to be climbed by going down a rather deep gorge first. And that also meant having to climb it all again to get back to the base later in the day. Energized by all the fun in that proposal event, I would like to believe that I gave it my all on the descent, and virtually alone at that. My usual MO, letting the fast ones advance and hiking solo in the middle of the pack just in time to hear the voices of the sweeper team on my rest stops before treading back again was a real introvert’s delight. There was one unforgettable moment where I just stopped under the pine trees, kicked the needles on the trail to form a heap and just spread-eagled there like a kid in grammar school on his first conscious experience of snow. While I was at it, I opened my trail food- I was on a Cream-O Brownie Crunch craze at the time- and just poured all of the bits into my mouth while lying down. All in the relative solitude and serenity of the Tenglawan trail. But my adrenaline would come back firing on all fours when I noticed I had lost my bearings, I backtracked for at least three times until I was satisfied with my GPS readings.

Going back up the town was a real agony, and all the time I was just thinking of that Bakun shake which we had by the side of the municipal hall on our first day (which was just yesterday, but seemed like ages). Unfortunately, daylight had just closed on me, and so had the fruit stand where the shake was made, so I headed straight for soda. The sweeper team had arrived, with Mayeh in tears for the second time in one day.

By then, we had already been sharing the comfort of the Municipal Hall with another climbing group, who, by all things holy, had chosen to convert the backyard to a filling station. So I took the trouble of moving to the communal restroom out in town instead of using the one at the back of the hall. After all, for a couple of strides I get to wash down my tired limbs with natural spring water. It felt like iced water, and all pain went down the drain with it.

Mt Kabunian on the third day proved to be the most difficult, because I had already exhausted almost every ounce of my pride on the first two mountains. What little pride I had left was the thought that I would never be coming back home with just ‘Bakun Duo’ under my belt. Other hikers choose to just hang around by the municipal hall and wait for the entire team on the third day, a thought I dismissed all too quickly, however tempting. I had no regret, for this third mountain turned out to be the most beautiful of the three. Kabunian is a tapestry of different Cordillera flavors, a repertoire of hanging bridges, stone steps, rolling grassy lumps, coffin parade all cast in a crucible of local folklore.

I was last to summit, but I am just glad to have summited at all. And while I crawled (in the most literal sense of the word) the last steps to the top, I could hear voices of my teammates doing the group picture but begging each other to wait for me, because I had the better camera. Even though I had already told them I was a novice, and the possession of a dslr was borne of chance.

As Kabunian was an out-and-back hike (backtrail in local parlance), I saw it as an opportunity to redeem photo-op chances, especially at the thriller trail when I had not recovered yet on the way up. Having left the camera to the sweeper guide, I charged down the stone steps on to the famed foot-wide dead drop and did some kind of a tacky pose. But Miss Lady Guide was not shooting. Hand signals proving too futile and already leading to a communication breakdown, I walked back in regret to a spot where I could engage her in a shouting match. I lost right away at the faint audible sound of ‘ser, memory card full..’ A couple more exchanges and we succeeded at the decision for her to scroll right and delete several photos of fried chicken.

We left the town of Bakun in the afternoon with a heavy heart. Such is the response when you have stayed too long in an enchanting community. I recall only having one stopover on the way back to Baguio, and that was when we relieved ourselves from all the dust that had gotten too much to bear and we could no longer recognize one another inside the monster jeep. And thus the name Team Alabok, to which this journal post is dedicated to.

This was our ‘summer camp’ and we have gone our separate ways. But we kept in touch, at least in social media. Since then, I had been doing ambassador work for both Headware and Tribu. Roy Gella had done legendary long distance ‘die-hikes’, along with Albert Asonio. Albert had also made a name for himself by winning consecutive raffle draws in a famous online outdoor shop, and his winning streak may not be over yet. Deya had been successfully organizing one big climb after another under the banner of Diwatang Gala, and I had rejoined her just recently in a ‘reverse traverse’ of Mount Amuyao. Mayeh manages an online shop. Mr and Mrs Rean, Midge and Kelvin had focused on family but have still been hiking occasionally- something I deeply relate to. I sat with Kelvin on the bus back to Manila and we found out our daughters were of the same name! Charles had been part of a Lagataw hike hereafter, but had since been swept off his feet by a special lady and decided to re-channel his energy to romance, along with his outstanding video editing skills. Adriel is still the mountain biking and exploration legend that he is. Rupert had set foot on the Himalayas, ticked Annapurna off his list, snow and all.

Team Alabok

Charles on top of the Carrot Rock

Going up Mt Lobo

Random bridge

#mountains #hiking #philippines #backpacking bakuntrio pinoymountaineer

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ramialkarmi · 6 years

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How a Netflix documentary got inside New York City's intensely insular Hasidic community

"One of Us" is a Netflix documentary that gives a rare look inside New York City's insular Hasidic community.

Directors Heidi Ewing and Rachel Grady spent three years making it.

Two of the three people they spotlight in the movie said they suffered sexual or physical abuse before leaving the community.

Since the movie became available on Netflix in late October, young people within the community are watching it, the filmmakers said.

Documentary filmmakers Heidi Ewing and Rachel Grady have spent their careers getting access to places most believed were impossible to crack.

For their Oscar-nominated doc “Jesus Camp” (2006), they looked at a summer camp where kids were convinced that they had "prophetic gifts." In "The Boys of Baraka" (2005), they chronicled the journey of 12 boys from Baltimore’s most violent neighborhoods who attended a boarding school in rural Kenya to get a chance at an education they couldn't receive back home.

So when Netflix caught wind that Ewing and Grady were making a movie about people trying to separate from New York City’s insular Hasidic community, it jumped at the chance to be involved.

“We were working under the radar for a year; we didn’t need to be pitching it,” Ewing told Business Insider.

The two had received foundation money to start the movie, which would go on to be titled "One of Us." They were at the very beginning stages of trying to gain trust with people in the community, and Netflix saw the potential and wanted in.

Finding people who didn't want to be found

“We were very reluctant because we felt we hadn’t landed our final subjects,” Ewing said of talking to Netflix. “When they wanted to come on board we told them the people on the footage you saw probably aren’t going to be in the movie, we need a couple of years to make this. They were willing to do it.”

“One of Us” is a striking movie that looks at the lives of three Hasidic Jews who make the tough choice to leave the community. Twenty-something Luzer breaks ties with his entire family to pursue acting; Ari leaves while still suffering the trauma of alleged sexual abuse while in the community (which led to substance abuse); and Etty, the movie’s standout, leaves her children behind after saying she's had enough of the physical abuse from the man she was forced to marry at 19.

Ewing and Grady eventually chose to focus on these subjects after meeting them at the organization Footsteps, a support group for former Hasidic Jews whom the filmmakers found out about.

“The Hasidic community was a topic Heidi and I were both very interested in but never thought there was a point of access because they have their own community and have their own language, literally,” Grady said. “It seemed out of the cards. But then we learned about Footsteps. They had been approached many, many times by many filmmakers, but we managed to persuade them to at least let us meet their membership and let us make our pitch. It’s essentially the same process that we always have had.”

But the get-to-know-you process was longer than anything they had gone through before with a reluctant group. It took the filmmakers six months of talking to the leaders behind Footsteps, but they were finally allowed to come to meetings without cameras three years ago. It then took another six months for them to find their three subjects.

“We really wanted to capture a transition,” Ewing said. “Some people we didn’t go forward with because they were too fragile and couldn’t endure being followed by us. Others were too far out in the world already.”

The three they eventually went with were a mix of both. Etty and Ari were literally a week or two from deciding to leave the community when the filmmakers met them at Footsteps. And Luzer had been out for over a year, so he could show how people adapt when they are more removed.

The sudden change of heart by one of the movie's most compelling characters

But the backbone of the movie is Etty.

At first she refused to have her face shown on camera, which led to a challenge Ewing and Grady had never encountered before, as they had never allowed someone in their films who didn’t agree to be shown. Yet the stories of women being abused within the Hasidic community were coming up more and more as the filmmakers got deeper into making the movie, they said. And they knew they needed to have a woman featured who would speak about it.

“We just struggled creatively how we were going to show her,” Grady said. “Animate her? Shoot her from behind? It was a horrible puzzle.”

The filmmakers decided to animate the Etty footage with a chalk-outline look. Tests were done with footage to get it right. But then halfway through filming Etty decided to let Ewing and Grady show her face.

“She became a different person at one point of shooting,” Ewing said. “She shed a skin and someone else was there. As a filmmaker, this is one of those rare moments.”

The drama of the Etty reveal is shown in the movie. Her storyline begins with the viewer only seeing the back of her head, while she describes disturbing moments in her past. Then, halfway through the movie, there’s a moment when Etty turns and shows her face on camera.

It's the movie's most striking moment that shows Etty taking that first step into starting a new life for herself.

Since filming the movie, none of the three main subjects have returned to the community, Ewing and Grady said. Lozer has been acting onstage and in films, Ari has gotten sober after a stint in rehab, and Etty is going to community college and an educational trust fund has been started to get her to a four-year college.

Why Netflix's worldwide reach has mattered for the documentary

Though Ewing and Grady had almost no contact from leaders inside the Hasidic community while making the movie — though after two years, a Rabbi who is friends with Ari agreed to be interviewed on camera — word about the movie has grown since “One of Us” became available on Netflix in late October.

“A lot of young people are watching it on their iPhones in the bathroom,” Ewing said. “I was in a shop the other day and there were a group of Israeli girls there and they showed me their WhatsApp group in Hebrew that they were having with their conservative family members about the movie.”

The filmmakers said being involved with Netflix turned the movie from just another powerful documentary that people hear about (but isn't playing at a nearby theater), to one that can cause change because it’s so easily available to those who need to see it.

“Everywhere there is a Hasidic community there happens to be Netflix available: the United States, England, Canada, and Israel. We passed on a traditional theatrical release to have this movie drop globally on the same day.”

SEE ALSO: 4 reasons "Justice League" has flopped at the box office

Join the conversation about this story »

NOW WATCH: Here's what Melissa Joan Hart — who played Clarissa and Sabrina the Teenage Witch — is doing today

#Tech Insider #Arab #Entrepreneurship #sillicon alley insider

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asusirwritesalot-blog · 7 years

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Sweeney Todd appreciation post

In the latter parts of my last semester, I signed up for my high school’s annual summer production. I’ve done a good bit of theatre in the past few years of my life, and it’s become a pretty important part of who I am. I’m by no means a good actor or a good singer (although I’d say I’m probably better at singing), but I manage to get pretty good roles most of the time. I’ve gotten attached to some of the roles I’ve had over the past couple years, particularly to George Banks of Mary Poppins. Other times, I’ve gotten attached to shows in general, such as The Secret Garden. From the moment I finished that show, I repeatedly claimed it as my favorite musical. It still is very dear to me, and I think that the music is almost as beautiful now as the first time I heard it. I’ll probably write at some point about why “Lily’s Eyes” and “A Bit of Earth” are some of my favorite songs not only in musicals, but of all time.

To my surprise, this summer, The Secret Garden finally got beaten. I had originally signed up to be a part of Titanic: The Musical. However, after auditions happened, the folks in charge found out that we were short on males. They ended up deciding to change the show to Sweeney Todd, and thank god they did.

I believe the biggest reason I like The Secret Garden so much can be summed up in one word: melodrama. The powerful brass, the rises and falls in the music, the dreary plot that is almost too real. What kind of person can’t sympathize with a poor orphaned girl and her lonely father figure? Archibald is a truly tragic character: trapped in a mansion with no one but his bitter brother and overbearing servants to grace him from the haunting memories of his dead wife, the one person who ever accepted him regardless of his physical flaws.

What I find amazing about Sweeney Todd in contrast to The Secret Garden is the way it breaks my heart and fills my soul with beautiful music while still incorporating plenty of humor. There are plenty of musicals that do this, for sure, but I wouldn’t say that Mary Poppins is on the same level simply due to it’s overall silliness. It has deep messages and good music, sure, but it isn’t harsh enough. It doesn’t hit you with that sense of relatability. I’ve never had a magical nanny show up at my window and save my family from its deepest conflicts, but I certainly have heard of orphaned children, wrongfully incriminated people, and poverty. All of these are present in Sweeney, but Steven Sondheim managed to create these somber situations all while incorporating Pirelli as comedic relief that actually makes a little bit of sense.

All in all, I just can’t help but feel that Sweeney Todd is extremely effective at everything it does. It still has the most important piece (to me), though: the copious amounts of drama. Not only do we have an almost Shakespearean tragedy as our plot, but the music itself is powerful throughout. I’m going to write a paragraph about a couple of my favorite songs from the show. My favorites are probably also the most popular, but whatever.

Firstly, let’s talk about “My Friends”. It’s definitely one of the most popular songs in the show, especially given that it leads into the famous “Lift your razor” segment. The song begins when Mrs. Lovett remembers that she hid Benjamin Barker’s razors, rather than selling them when he was deported. Although she humorously tries to justify this by saying that she simply didn’t sell them in case Barker showed up again one day, it’s an obvious clue-in to the fact that Mrs. Lovett is obsessed with Sweeney Todd. I’m not sure whether to call it love per se, but if the audience doesn’t realize that Mrs. Lovett has feelings for Sweeney after this introduction, the song itself will soon make it clear. Sweeney sees the razors, a symbol of his past life, of his happiness, and almost romances them as the music begins to play. He calls the razors his “friends” and caresses them as he sings. Soon, Mrs. Lovett joins in, but she isn’t quite on the same page as him. Throughout the song, Sweeney dominates with his powerful, reminiscent, yet dark and brooding tone, while Mrs. Lovett stands to the side and interjects her feelings of friendship, hopefulness, and beauty. It’s a very stark contrast, especially once the audience figures out that Sweeney is only pondering how his razors will help him to murder the Judge and the Beadle. My personal favorite quotes from this song are “You’ve been locked out of sight all these years. Like me, my friend. Well, I’ve come home.” and, of course, “You shall drip rubies”. The cryptic sound of Sweeney’s voice is truly disturbing. But, it’s cool disturbing, you know? As a side note, there’s a really neat video on Youtube somewhere of Steven Sondheim directing two theatre students (Sweeney and Mrs. Lovett) at performing this song. It’s definitely worth a watch.

“Green Finch and Linnet Bird” is another really cool one. I don’t have nearly as much to say about this one. My main thought is that the comparison between Johanna and the caged birds is very cool. I especially like how Johanna’s vocal style even mimics bird songs.

“Kiss Me (Part 2)” also piques my interest. No one ever expects the Beadle to come out with a grand falsetto at the end, but it’s somehow not overly comical. The quartet is great, and shows a strong contrast between young and old. The funniest part about this quartet is how the Beadle is unknowingly leading the Judge to his death, and he’s so enthusiastic about it. Good stuff.

“Pretty Women” is the song that comes directly after, and, although I may be biased in liking it so much (I was the Judge), I might argue for it as my favorite song in the show. The song begins with a funny little impersonation of the Beadle’s apologetic advice from the previous song. Turpin sings in a commanding tone, giving him the upper hand. Sweeney is still in shock, surprised that the Judge who he wants to kill more than anything, randomly appeared at his shop. After the Judge’s instructions, Sweeney gets himself together and wittily affirms that the shave will be the closest he ever gave. Turpin, still with the advantage in the mental tug-of-war that the two will have throughout the song, begins to contently “bub dum” a tune. Todd, entering the battle, thinks “I can play your game, Judge”, and whistles alongside him. Todd has gained the upper hand, showing that he can keep up with Turpin. After some back and forth “banter” singing between the two, Todd asks “What more can man require than love sir?” But, it is a rhetorical question. Still with the upper hand, he answers himself and reveals the answer to be “women. pretty women”. The Judge, in agreement and still in the dark about Sweeney’s true identity as the father of the young girl he’s creepily forcing into marriage, continues his song. He gains ground here, but not long after the power is transitioned to Sweeney once more as we hear a short reprise of “My Friends”. However, the Judge interrupts him at the height of his song, telling Sweeney to stop goofing around and start working. Sweeney loses power as he replies “my lord”, and then he finds out that the Judge is planning on marrying his daughter. As if he didn’t already have enough motivation to murder Turpin! Todd, potentially out of spite, almost reveals himself when he asks if Johanna is as “pretty as her mother”. After this, which is really only the introduction to the song, Sweeney once again gains power as he begins shaving the Judge. The audience is supposed to believe that he will slit the Judge’s throat right then and there, but Todd instead decides to toy with Turpin and enjoy his moment of revenge. The remainder of the song is a straightforward yet beautiful duet, wherein Todd and the Judge sing passionately about pretty women. In this case, Todd is probably thinking of his wife, Lucy, while Turpin is singing about Johanna, Todd’s daughter. The music is truly beautiful, and we believe that Todd has gained complete control. Not only is he the only one who fully understands the song, but his razor is at the Judge’s throat, waiting for the perfect moment to exact his revenge. The song reaches it’s height, Sweeney’s razor is raised, and the tension is unimaginable. And then Anthony comes into the shop, giddily singing about his upcoming marriage to Johanna. Sweeney’s moment is ruined, and the Judge furiously storms out.

And those songs, ladies and gentlemen, are only the best from Act 1. Act 2 has plenty of powerful moments, such as the hugely disturbing “God, That’s Good”, the eerie “City on Fire”, the humorous “By the Sea”, and, of course, the heart-wrenching “Not While I’m Around”.

If I was given the chance to be a part of Sweeney Todd again, I’d like to give Judge Turpin a second try, or perhaps take on the role of the Beadle. I personally couldn’t do Sweeney justice, but I do hope to one day revisit this show. For now, I will continue to praise it as my favorite musical.

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handandbanner · 7 years

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Answering Questions

Why do you post so much on race issues? What about posting on other things so that it doesn’t look like you’re seeking out these issues and they are taking over your life?

My work in real life is as a racial justice activist with particular interest in African, Caribbean and Black identifying experiences locally. I also find connection between local issues and what is happening in other parts of the country/world. My activism has taken different forms. Primarily it’s been about using grassroots programmatic intervention to address wellness issues (social, economic, etc.) being experienced by especially Black children and youth locally. Through grant-writing I have been able to redistribute over $1/4 million directly into the local grassroots community in the past seven years that has mostly been used to provide various youth jobs through programs like Young City Grower and Canada Summer Jobs employment that has provided youth people with admin and community organizing roles, so decreasing their socio-economic isolation through jobs. It has also largely been used to create urban agricultural infrastructure, creating inclusive gardening spaces that have benefited Black immigrant families but also immigrant families of every background who want to grow their own food or just experience wellness that comes form connecting to the land, and families who are not immigrants but may be experiencing food insecurity. In this capacity, I have also worked as a land based activist, pursuing food justice by working with my hands in creating urban agriculture spaces around the city. The money has also helped fund cultural, arts and educational events that have had social and emotional health benefits to Black communities locally. One of the most important things is that the money has helped in creating after school educational support programming for Black immigrant children that is led by their communities. Thes is just the time put in writing and re-writing grants that mostly get rejected but some are successful. I have also contributed my own labour in a volunteer capacity. Sometimes I have had part time employment doing the work I do, and the seasons where there has been employment the labour has usually exceeded the reimbursement significantly. Most people know that $250,000 to approx. $300,000 over seven years in social services is not a lot of money. Most agencies have an annual budget of 1 million plus dollars to deliver services in their given area. We have used what we have gotten in the grassroots to create significant impact for many lives over the last seven years. I entered this form of activism after learning of the local expression of systemic racism of excluding Black folks from participating in creating solutions to the problems that face them. Poor Black communities locally are considered underserved communities. We have educational crisis as well as social crisis being experienced by the most vulnerable members of our communities. Programming funds don’t actually solve the issues because they are based on often one-time hit and miss funds. The kind of work that we do is not part of any ongoing government funding strategy (municipal, provincial or federal). We depend on activists, volunteers and hit and miss grants to try and address the documented gaps being experienced by the local Black community. So, though we are tax payers, our communities continue to experience funding racism from local government with regards to services.

So that is one area of racial justice activism that I have given my life to. I have been economically impacted by being a grassroots organizer. And recently I have had to pause some of the programs and explore new ways of sustaining myself and the labour as I work on finishing my schooling to become a registered social worker which would also hopefully increase my financial security in the future to support the work that is being done, even if others take over the frontline labour.

Another expression of my activism beyond being a community organizer is as a race scholar (student). While I have been reading and learning about Black issues and from Black scholars ever since entering the work, I guess on an official capacity I have just recently been involved in race-based research geared at documenting the systemic racism affecting the lives of our communities provincially and across the country. Research contracts especially in the last year have both been a source of income and my primary form of engagement.

I have also been involved in direct action resistance. I have helped organize when folks in my community have wanted to publicly demonstrate their concerns with the justice system and concerns around the loss of Black life in our community or in other parts of the country as part of the BLM movement. I have also helped organize community solidarity gatherings in response to state violence against Black communities in America. I have hosted racial healing circles in local universities and at my local church and I am currently planning to hold more spaces this Fall that tend to trauma and engage racial justice concerns.

So, I post about these topics because they connect to my work, they are not taking over my life they are already my life, they are an important part of who I am. I also I am not sure about the idea that social media is a place where I must present my whole balanced self, it’s certainly not the primary avenue for folks to get to know me. But I am not necessarily opposed to posting about other parts of my life. I am also a mother and I post about that sometimes. I don’t post about vacations and travelling the world (I’m assuming those are the normative good kind of things to post about?) because there is a high cost associated with that work, so I cannot typically afford to take big vacations. When I have had the chance to travel (thanks to my work) I have posted those pictures. But the things that give me joy in my life are predominantly my sons, reading and a bit of gardening. I live a very simple life and I try to embrace that. My short-term goals are to achieve physical health and to grow lots of flowers and be involved in lots of physical activities with my boys. I have had hard seasons associated with living simply but ultimately, I love Black people especially our most vulnerable members of community. I am inspired by folks who have died for us. So, I understand that sacrifice is part of this beautiful and demanding work. My boys have paid the highest price in this early days of my activism, so my life is about coming to peace with that and seeking help and guidance on how to best parent them and protect them. It helps to seek meaning and strength from a son-sacrificing Creator who understands my heartbreak. I know that pain and suffering can be addictive (chemically) after long-term exposure, so I am careful of that and I’m constantly trying to lean into figuring out ways of engaging that support my health and wellness and better my financial security. I look forward to less financially precarious avenues of engagement.

Why use social media at all?

I am intrigued by the role of social media in racial justice, particularly in contemporary Black liberation movements. It didn’t start as an intentional decision that this was going to be a use of my social media space. It was just about sharing what was going on in my life. But it has grown into an intentional kind of use of social media. Social media is not perfect but I am very much impressed by the kind of change that has been achieved by Black women leaders on social media to bring attention to racial injustice. I am not a social media activist as others are and do so effectively, for me it’s been almost more of a personal documenting of process and thought. I can’t remember who said this but I remember a quote during a Princeton AAS podcast that resonated to my experience. That social media for the Black activist becomes a space to live out the liberated life that is not afforded in the physical space. I also think about Toni Morison’s whole thing about writing the book you always wanted to read. It has had a therapeutic role for me. I want to live in a space where witness is provided to Black struggle through naming and reporting, so even if it’s just my own posts that break the loud silence, I feel better about it because I can’t stand the silence. There is almost a sense of talking to ones-self in public. I won’t say being understood doesn’t matter, but it is not paramount. I’m certainly not doing it for White people. I say that because I have had people tell me that if I’m looking to engage White people then perhaps how I am going about it is not the best way. I think sometimes because of White supremacy; white folks dominate so much existence for BIPOC in physical spaces that it’s hard in our world to make sense of any BIPIC activity that is not necessarily about appealing and appeasement to Whiteness. Very recently I have engaged in speaking directly to Whiteness, but again it’s a process figuring it out but I don’t know that it is always for specific results. In a strange way, it’s almost like political art or poetry in the sense that it is primarily about expression. So, like art, I can say that it’s not so much that I don’t care about engagement but it’s just not the central thing. There is something being documented here which is sometimes the raw responses of a Black woman to racism and maybe it’s just about being a human being, and maybe under White supremacist empire that is something that folks sometimes have a heard time making sense of, a Black human. I have sometimes benefited from meaningful engagement, I have also had people a few years down the road email me about how positively impacted they have been by my posts and public musings, other times I have had folks be scared, offended or hurt. I particularly obviously love it when Black folks feel positively impacted by anything I do. But I just don’t centre all of that. And I’d like to emphasize that my primary ways of connecting with folks around mobilization, action or conversation about racial justice is not primarily on social media.

I also can’t say that I think for sure that all of this is healthy, I think there are risks for sure. I don’t know how long I will continue to express myself in this way. I am interested in the work of folks like Imani Perry and their critiques. I recognize this is a new thing and that we don’t know the long-term effects and impacts of social media in general on our health.

Why not create a page that deals with racial issues as part of your work and separate it from your personal life?

I may in the future If I think there is some benefit to it. But the short answer is that I don’t ascribe to the private/public dichotomy with regards to work that was created by patriarchy to designate domestic and outside the home labour. So, there is a feminist turned womanist understanding that my private life informs my work and vice versa. My being a mother and my caring about other people’s children is intertwined. Racial justice is part of parenting and part of self love. I bring my whole self into theorizing about race. I also intertwine my faith and spirituality into my politics. I ascribe to the African indigenous worldview of the interconnectedness of all things. And I want to get even better at it. There are things I may chose not to disclose to avoid harm to myself and others. But as I grow older I want to understand better how all of me is intertwined with my contribution in the world. I don’t know what Creator has in store around the corner and I might have to work in a setting that where I cannot be my full self, and then I would be working even harder to create spaces that I can enter as my whole self. I don’t think it’s my accident that in a White Supremacist Capitalist Patriarchy we must live as divided selves. Lying is central to maintaining domination and we all lie (bell Hooks does a lot of good work on lying and domination). I want to lie less and be less scared.

Do you hate White people? Are White people the enemy? Why do you make generalized statements about people groups?

No, I don’t nurture hate towards White people. But nobody is beyond hate especially towards oppressive forces in one’s life, so it takes work to operate from a place of radical love and it takes spiritual practice and re-orientation when I do struggle with hate. It helps to be able to have loving connections with White people through personal or community relationships. When talking about race as a social issue I make generalized statements that are statistically and experientially supported. My spiritual framework dictates that flesh and blood is not the ultimate enemy but rather powers and principalities. I believe that White supremacy and racism are major enemy ideologies in the work that I engage in and I do believe that these ideologies are carried out in particular ways by White people who get to have stake-hold in these enemy ideologies. Having said that I do think that folks can embody and carry out harmful ideologies and in doing so set themselves as physical manifestations of oppositional forces. So in the process of dealing with folks in such situations even though there may be love, there may also be strong resistance, boundary setting, reporting and naming and maybe righteous force depending on one’s embraced values of engagement.

Do you believe all White people are racists and White supremacists?

It is hard for me to imagine anyone who has been socialized in any part of the world that is impacted by White supremacy and colonization as not having to do work to dismantle internal as well as social systems that idealize whiteness and denigrate other forms of humanity. It is also the case that spaces for carrying out such work are yet to be made readily available worldwide, and less so in White dominant societies. So yes, it is my experience that all White people are on the spectrum of embodied White supremacist ideologies.

What about all the problems in Africa and tribalism? Why are you just worried about White Supremacy?

This is a bad racist question to ask Black first-gen folks engaged in anti-racist work but you could see articles on asking about Black on Black crime in response to anti-racist work, same principles apply.

What kind of relationships do you envision with White people given the work you do?

I don’t have a manifesto of desired ways of connecting with just White people. But I do envision inter-racial relationships in my life where it is possible to know folks of diverse backgrounds and to be known. With regards to engagement of myself as a racial justice worker, I appreciate expressions of love and support, and I am glad for those that have been brought to my path who extend love and support. In other spheres of relationship not related to my work, I don’t want to experience stigma related to my politics or the work that I do. Instead of demands or questions like; “What should I do as a white person” when folks come across my concerns for racial justice, you might ask; “Would you be interested in having coffee sometime and sharing more about your work?”. If you don’t desire to get to know me better, that’s okay too. I also tend to be open to get to know people but there are times that I can’t invest in that manner for a number of reasons. I’m always welcoming prayer and happy to pray for you too. But outside of knowing each other, don’t try to shape or control how I express myself as a Black woman. It is also okay to disconnect on social media and be connected in other ways.

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