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Hello....Do you mind if I ask your top 10 favorite characters (can be male or female) from all of the media that you loved (can be anime/manga, books, movies or tv series)? And why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before.....Thanks...

I've been asked my top 10 before, but never from all of the media I love and I've never been asked to elaborate on why I love them. Not to mention that the list changes as I watch/read new stuff, so it's good to update it. Then again, I don't watch live action that much, so I'm afraid it's gonna be all animanga/books, if you don't mind.

I must say, though, that it was impossible to decide on 10 this time around. So I resorted to listing my top 5. The list is in no particular order, by the way.

1. Kuchiki Rukia

So this one was an instant fave and I don't even think I need to explain much. Badass, kindhearted, A+ sense of humor. Just checks all the boxes. Also love her unique character design.

2. Gilbert Bougainvillea

I strictly mean the book version of him. Gil was one of the very few fictional characters to ever surprise me. I love how unapologetically emotional he is and how he's always making sure the people he holds dear get to live a happy life. The way he's such a "family and friends first" kinda guy and yet nobody seems to realize it simply because he looks like the aloof type is bitterly relatable for me. Also the way he acknowledges how unfair life is for him despite being brough up in an environment that, in theory, had everything to meet all his needs, and yet tries to make the best of it all. And my God, the amount of Respect Women Juice that this guy drinks. Goals as a human being, tbh. (Yes, the books are that different from the anime.)

3. Oikawa Tsurara

I normally don't vibe all that much with characters like Tsurara, but she quite literally opened new horizons for me in fandom. Imagine the dumb, clingy servant girl stereotype turned upside down. You start out fearing that she'll fit into the Mold TM, and before you realize it, she's risen to become an upper officer in command of two clans and is endgame with the protagonist (with three more guys pinning after her). Except this isn't a Cinderella kind of journey; she was always treated by her love interest as an equal and was always portrayed as having immense potential. Her jealousy of her rivals seems comical but is actually valid, as her suspicions always hit home. She's smart and strong and not at all delusional, and the story makes sure to give her a steady growth. She never becomes overpowered, but the protagonist only gets to that level because of her.

4. Takigawa Masaki

Again, book version. Motherfucker just be casually defying every god in existence because y'all can't just try to kill my disciple like that, what the actual fuck. The "Catch These Hands" priest, because he'll punch the shit outta whoever gets between him and the little bitch who tried to harm his students. And then he'll fuck into his shrine in the middle of the woods like nothing happened. His main occupation, however, is to be hot as hell. Truly an icon.

5. Sheryl Nome

Same as with Tsurara, I normally don't vibe much with characters like Sheryl, but holy fuck, the amount of respect I have for this woman. Macross is a franchise that specializes in taking archetypes and tropes and subverting them completely, and Frontier is my favorite because the character handling in this thing is good fucking food.

Sheryl has such an attitude but she can back it up. And she does it in ways that are charismatic, rather than annoying or bitchy. She absolutely never puts herself down and is never portrayed as actually fragile and inoffensive on the inside. The narrative gets points too for never going "she's amazing but she won't ever be as good as the protagonist". And she's cute, sure, but she's also dangerous and is out there to get what she wants. Yet there's so much heart to her. So much passion and admiration for all things alive and for connecting with them through music. She usually only does what she wants but is so ridiculously selfish with the people she cherishes. Easily one of the most extremely complex and absurdly cool femme fatales in animanga.

A recap of the Brontë2020 Virtual Conference

On Friday the very first virtual Brontë conference was held and included a program of various talks and presentations by people knowledgeable on many different aspects of the Brontës. And reader, I had a wonderful time.  

This post is just a brief overview of the event, with some commentary on the different topics and comments that were discussed and that I found interesting. This conference was held as a way to help support the amazing Brontë Parsonage in Haworth as they are going through a difficult time with the impact of Covid-19. If you are able, please donate whatever you can to the Parsonage by visiting this site. Help them reach their goal!

I live in the United States so I wasn’t able to attend all the panels - I decided to make my first one the discussion with Sandy Welch (screenwriter of the 2006 Jane Eyre adaptation) which was 5 am my time! I was so excited to hear what Sandy had to say about writing Jane Eyre that I was wide awake by the time her panel started.

Special Guest: Sandy Welch

First off, I didn’t realize Welch had also written the screenplay for North and South (one of my absolute favorite period dramas!) so I was pretty much in awe of her talent, even though the 2006 Jane Eyre isn’t exactly my favorite. If you read through my reviews of all the adaptations here. I have a few issues with the scenes after the failed wedding where Jane and Rochester are on her bed. And also I felt like the dialogue and added scenes did not always feel true to the novel. But Welch talked about her approach to adapting Jane Eyre and I agreed with all of her comments. Jane is a modern woman in that she is making her own way in the world, and that her thoughts and prose in the book are direct and clear to the reader. And Welch was glad to give more time to the conversations between Jane and Rochester so that the humor and intelligence that connects them shines through. The emotions were allowed to develop and we can see how Rochester changes with Jane.  

There was some discussion about the character of Rochester and how the audience needs to see that they deserve each other and are equals. So you see more of Rochester’s vulnerabilities and emotions in this adaptation. It’s important to remember too that Charlotte made Bertha irredeemable so that Rochester could not make his situation better, but he tried his best to take care of her.  

A question from the audience did bring up that scene where Jane must say goodbye to Rochester and they end up on her bed - I was very keen to know what Welch would say. She acknowledged that it was a bold choice, but there is that sensuality in the book, and Rochester wants to “impress” himself on Jane, and throughout the novel, Jane is very passionate. It seemed natural to Welch to have that shown on screen. It’s a bit of artistic license that still doesn’t sit easily with me, but I am glad to know the thought process was grounded in trying to take a realistic approach to how that scene would develop.

Another question also asked about the addition of the twins and the doubles theme in the adaptation. Welch included that to give Jane an opportunity to participate in the conversation around her since she is intelligent and able to hold her own. And to show that not all of the people in Rochester’s party are horrible. It also gives a little foreshadowing to the call across the moors between Jane and Rochester near the end.

The last topic I want to mention is when someone asked what the difference was between approaching Margaret Hale’s character (from North and South) and Jane Eyre. Welch worked to make Margaret more sympathetic and Thornton a little less so, so that they were equals in the story - much like Jane and Rochester already are.

A Day in the Life of the Parsonage

I was very excited about this next panel, where Ann Dindsdale, the collections manager of the Parsonage, and Rebecca Yorke, the communications manager, talk about what it is like to manage the Parsonage day to day. It made me long to be able to work there myself! Just think how lovely it would be to be up early in the morning at the house, preparing for the visitors that day.

On my last visit to the Parsonage, I was able to take the VIP tour (which I talked about here) and I have to say seeing a glimpse of the place behind the scenes and led by a knowledgeable docent was amazing. They do wonderful work there!

The two talked about the work that goes into maintaining the house - especially during the month-long closure in January where they clean every book and check every piece of furniture! When asked how they decide what to display, Ann said she puts out “what she likes” (lucky!) but it was also good to rotate everything regularly.  

The Parsonage feels it is important for guests to “engage with the Parsonage” - a wonderful way to describe how the guests are made to feel when they visit - as a part of the experience. And with social distancing right now due to the pandemic, visiting the Parsonage couldn’t be a more personal and intimate experience. I so wish I could make the trip across the pond right now and visit!

Author Roundtable: The Brontës, the 21st Century and Us

This was a fascinating panel with talented authors. I’ve read some of their books so I’ll link to my review of their work when possible. The panel was moderated by Rowan Coleman (The Vanished Bride) and included Finola Austin (Brontës’ Mistress), Syrie James (The Secret Diaries of Charlotte Brontë), Sarah Shoemaker (Mr. Rochester), Julie Cohen (Spirited), Lucy Powrie (The Paper Hearts Society) and Nikita Gil (a well-known poet, although unfortunately I am unfamiliar with her work.  

The conversation was dense and thought-provoking. The authors touched on many topics and ideas beginning with how each author felt about the Brontës’ work. Their books are about identity and who we are as people - we can live by their ideals, said Lucy. Sarah said that women are still not equal to men in how they are treated today and she loves how Jane does not hesitate to tell Rochester that she does not think him handsome - it’s an unconventional answer, the unexpected one, and it shows how they are opening up to each other and on their way to being equals. Syrie is fascinated by the almost mythical story they lived in their little place in the world. And how you can feel their rage against patriarchal societies in their work. Nikita pointed out that patriarchy erases the role of women, but the Brontës have endured in spite of that.

In their approach to writing stories that revolve around the Brontës and their work, they try to be as reverential as possible and stick to the facts because so much of their lives are known, and their stories can be very autobiographical.  

Julie talked about how we read the Brontës to find out about ourselves. With Villette especially there is a sense with Lucy Snowe that she is hiding a part of herself from the reader and people can relate to that.

The talk ended with thoughts on publishing bias - how women may not need to publish under pseudonyms today, but there is still a bias against what a woman writes and against race, sexuality, and many other things. We as readers need to show that we are interested in reading about a variety of lives and experiences.

In Conversation with Adam Nagaitis

Adam Nagaitis played Branwell Brontë in the film To Walk Invisible and talked with the organizers about his role. They opened by asking him trivia questions about Branwell to see how much he remembered from his research. Adam mentioned that he is still in touch with the actresses who played his sisters which I think is wonderful. They seem to all have gotten along very well.  

Adam read all the classic works on Branwell to prepare, but he also dived into documentaries on alcoholism and it’s gruesome realities to understand Branwell better. Branwell wasn’t mature enough to deal with the vicissitudes in his life - with his relationship with Lydia he was excessive and consumed. He thought that turned her off from him, and that started a cycle where he blamed himself for the failed relationship and his failures in his art.  

Because he was always surrounded by the people who knew him best, he was always reminded of his failure. Adam’s approach was very sympathetic to Branwell and tried to understand him mentally. Adam also talked about how he felt Branwell was never free as an artist. He always needed to work for the family or money but he could have been a brilliant newspaper satirist - something that might have been more along with his interests since he made wonderful biting cartoons.

In Conversation with Sally Wainwright

The last panel of the conference was a talk with Sally Wainwright - the writer and director of the superb Brontë biopic To Walk Invisible. Sally was approached to write this back in 2010 but she didn’t have time until 2016 which coincided with Charlotte’s bicentenary. It was a tough shoot for her as she felt she didn’t get all the shots she wanted, but the set was fantastic. They recreated the Parsonage as accurately as they could, resulting in a place that is bleaker and more isolated than the actual Parsonage today.  

Sally also mentioned something that I found interesting - that she felt like the “Victorian” speak that people use today in period dramas probably didn’t really exist. We have constructed people in our period drama adaptations to speak in a particular way. And that the inclusion of curse words in her program showed that the characters were very like us - of course Branwell would curse and say the F-word.  

Her approach to adapting the story was always to show it as realistically as possible and she wanted to show how the family was an interdependent team. For people who felt that Branwell was featured too much in the story - it’s important to remember that he was the leader of their gang as children and that when they were older, living with an addict affected their work as can be seen in The Tenant of Wildfell Hall and Wuthering Heights.  

And speaking of Tenant of Wildfell Hall, apparently, Sally is working on a screenplay for the story, although it is on the backburner at the moment. She is having a hard time empathizing with Helen - especially because it is difficult today to empathize with a character who behaves in a certain way solely because of their religious beliefs. I do hope we get to see her adaptation of Anne’s work someday soon though!

Nancy Drew 2x1

ONE OF YOU apparently ran to @kat--writes, or as my friend and I call her Tumblr Kat, and snitched that I had not yet posted my Nancy Drew premiere review. I promised to get it up by today and yes it is technically after midnight but the sun has not yet risen, so please find my thoughts under the cut.

Before I do anything else let me just say I will never stop appreciating the continuous book Easter eggs the show writers drop. Nancy mentioning how she learned that trick with the mirror in “a bungalow mystery” when she did in fact pull that exact same trick in The Bungalow Mystery? Iconic.

Now that’s out of the way, I’m going to do something I’ve never really done before and start off with the negatives. Guys, I was underwhelmed.

Not by the episode itself, the episode was great. It picked up right where we left off and continued into the mystery of the Aglaeca, the cast was engaging, the horror was chilling, the story kept unfolding. The problem is, it was great as any other regular episode, it was less great as a season premiere. I waited TEN MONTHS for this episode. And granted I understand that ND didn’t get to finish off its first season how they wanted, but they have had, I repeat, ten months to plan this. The season 1 premiere, for all its issues, did exactly what a season premiere is supposed to do. It established relationships, a season-long arc, character trajectories, and even a couple of smaller plots. We saw Nancy and her dad were on the rocks, she and George didn’t get along in high school, Bess is rich but living in a van, Tiffany Hudson was murdered and the crew are suspects, George is sleeping with Ryan, Ace is working for the police, and we found the bloody Lucy Sable dress in Nancy’s attic, to name but a few.

You guys, that is a lot of plot lines. And the writers explored and solved every single one of them over the course of the season.

Now we have the season 2 premiere. The crew tries to find a mirror to fight the Aglaeca, meets a mouthy dude, and takes a break from the Aglaeca to hide from the Gorham wraith. (Gorham is 100% a play on Gotham fight me.) Like yes there is more if you squint, but aside from that nothing all that major really happened. Mr. Hudson is setting up a defense, but we knew that already. Ryan wants a relationship with Nancy and is pissed at Carson for keeping her a secret, but we knew that already. The new head cop doesn’t trust Nancy or the crew at all, but, again, we knew that already.

But since this was still a good episode even if a lackluster premiere, I will still give you some positives.

The Gorham wraith you guys, oh my god the horror was fantastic. Nancy Drew is really looking every other magic show’s super special effects in the eye as it hits them over the the head with a folding chair made by their costuming and makeup department. The scarecrow coming to life, banging on the back of the bus, crawling in after Nancy? On point. I was on the edge of my seat.

Ryan I know you are an asshole and your character arc is a work in progress but kidnapping? Are you serious right now? “Your suicidal girlfriend begged us to hide and take care of her child right before jumping off a cliff. Also I didn’t even know you were the father.” “Omg how dare you. Time for BLACKMAIL.” It’ll be interesting to see how this whole Ryan v Carson thing plays out. I suspect maybe Carson will become like an example father figure to Ryan, teach him how to be good to Nancy. Something like “if you’re serious about being a father lesson number one is it’s not about you anymore, it’s about her. And you sending me to prison won’t just hurt me it’ll hurt Nancy.” I think that would be a nice parallel, Kate was Lucy’s guidance counselor, and now Carson will be Ryan’s parental counselor/therapist/whatever.

I’m going to be completely honest here, I totally forgot Nick and George had not actually told Nancy they are together. No idea how long this is going to go on for, I suspect not that long, but maybe up until like episode 5 or 6. I do think it would be fun if Nancy found out in like the absolute worst way possible. Like here is my worst/best case scenario. I know Nancy is supposed to have some kind of thing with Gil so let’s say they hook up a couple times and he burns her, as he probably will, and Nancy goes to Nick cause she’s upset and needs to talk, and when he opens the door thinking it’s the pizza guy he is shirtless and George is in the bed behind him. Unlikely, but fun to imagine. But however they do it, all the Nick and George fans will undoubtedly get some fun footage of them sneaking around, so enjoy guys.

All the Nancy and Ace shippers are also getting good material, even if I want to grab Ace by the shoulders and physically shake him.

Nancy: I can’t let you guys help me summon the Aglaeca, there could be really bad consequences.

Crew: Psh, consequences? What consequences? We have the power of FRIENDSHIP.

*Aglaeca sends them all death visions*

Ace: How dare you drag me into this Nancy I can’t believe we’re all going to die because of you.

LIKE BRUH. ACE. MY GUY. If you could maybe use your considerable brain power to pull your head out of your ass for TWO SECONDS I would greatly appreciate it. Thanks. But aside from that, their scene at the end? Poetic cinema. The slow burn is strong with this one. Even if I do have faith she will eventually find her way back to Nick aaaaaaaaah

Not sure how I feel about the twins yet. I know they were in some other ND-verse book series, but tbh I only ever read the Nancy Drew books. I never delved into the Hardy Boys or anything else, I was a Drew girl all the way. I do think the writers could maybe have done a better job introducing us to Gil and making us like him. Like they were definitely going for the Han Solo type I feel, and George being all “wow the Bobsey twins are hardcore” as he ups the price while literally dying. Um, George, no, the Bobsey twins are fucking morons, or at least Mr. Diabetic over here is. It says a lot that Amanda had only two lines of dialogue and I liked her considerably more than Gil. But who knows, maybe they’ll grow on me. And they did mention their family used to work for the Hudsons, I would bet good money they know about more than one skeleton that’s been stuffed in the closet.

This paragraph right here is for me and the like two other Drewson shippers in the fandom. Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhh the first meeting flashback oh my god. I was dying. I rewatched it ten times. I am in love. The way they both just sort of stared at each other, the way Nancy clearly feels a certain amount of nostalgia for him and what they had. I am deceased. Honest to god I don’t care how many Nick x George and Nancy x Ace moments the writers throw at us, just as long as I continue to get crumbs like that I am good. Have faith guys.

And finally, oh my dear, talented writers. I would like to know when exactly you are planning on pulling my three most favorite women out of whatever floorboard you have stuffed them under. I WOULD LIKE DEAD LUCY, VICTORIA, AND HANNAH GRUEN TO PLEASE STAND UP. Yes I know Hannah Gruen is in the next episode but the wait is excruciating. And if the last time we saw Dead Lucy was going to be in the courtroom scene, her standing in the doorway as Nancy read her suicide note? I am going to mcfreaking lose it.

Well that’s all for today. Sorry this took so long, I guess I just wasn’t all that inspired by this premiere episode. But hopefully I will get the next one finished much quicker. And with that, I leave you until Wednesday the 27th when Nancy Drew 2x2, The Reunion of Lost Souls airs. See ya

all of who does what for Thunderstruck Starker

Wah, nonnie - this made my day! Thunderstruck is one of my favorite verses. If you haven’t read it, head over to AO3 to catch up with the entire series. 

For those of us that are lazy, the general gist is this: they are mechanics in a soulmate verse where pairs can hear the music their other half is listening to in their head. Peter is deaf, so it takes an alternate listening method for them to find each other. Life together ensues. 

Send me a ship & a prompt/au situation/idea and I’ll tell you who does what - 

Who accidentally pushes a door instead of pulling/vice versa: Tony is perpetually distracted. There are always designs in his head, or the song lyrics to the last song he heard on the radio. Since he’s so used to being in his own shop where everything does exactly what he wants it to, he doesn’t bother looking at a door when he comes to an unfamiliar one. It takes him walking into several before he thinks that maybe he should take his head out of his ass and be present. The fact that Peter doesn’t tell him before he walks into said doors is a sore spot for the two of them - though, it’s easy for Tony to laugh when he sees the sheer delight on Peter’s face. Both of them are very familiar with the sign for jackass for a reason. 

Who doodles little hearts all over the desk with their initials inside them: It starts to happen unconsciously. Peter is so distracted in class one day, he lets his mind focus on the music he can hear there, Tony obviously in the shop working, the AC/DC blaring a sure fire sign of that. He’s missing half the lecture, but that never seems to matter - his note taker is thorough and they haven’t touched a topic he doesn’t know thoroughly, yet. When everyone starts to get up at the end of class, he sees the hearts and they’re initials all locked together - the doodles mixing in with the song lyrics he hears over the course of the hour. At the end of the semester, his notebook is filled more with doodles and the many ways he figures out how to put Mr. Peter Stark down on paper - bubble letters and all. 

Who starts the tickle fights: A lot of times, neither of them plan to start the tickle wars that have been known to go on for days. There is a lot of finger spelling going on in bed, neither man willing to break away long enough to get a sign out, so the tangibility of the letters and symbols on skin becomes the easiest way for either of them to get their point across. Sometimes, when Tony is lounging on the couch with Peter’s head in his lap, it’s easy to get lost tracing long planes of smooth skin - his fingertips now pretty familiar with the territory. The touches that bring out the sounds Peter is so sparing with are repeated until a hand is batting his away and his soulmate is starting to retaliate. One time, they spent three days getting each other into situations where they could tickle the hell out of the other. When it’s Peter that starts it, Tony tries to ignore the tingling sensation racing across his skin - but he can’t, he’ll never be able to. By the time Peter is finding all of the good spots, Tony is on his knees - Peter’s cock usually filling him while fingers wonder. 

Who starts the pillow fights: Tony is a ninja when it comes to his pillow throwing skill. The longer he’s with Peter, the more creative he has to become to get the man’s attention. Sometimes, he just doesn’t want to get up off his chair, so he’ll chuck a pillow or throw the nearest soft thing he can reach. Peter always looks over at him with the slightest bit of irritation in his eye - like he’s worth more than the toss of a pillow. Which is exactly right. Tony usually gets up and gives him a kiss, the intended interaction sitting on hold until they come up for air. Peter is stealth with his attacks and usually uses Tony’s never ending need to never have the other mad at him to his advantage. He’ll slam the pillow against Tony’s face when he comes in for a ‘I’m sorry’ hug and then it’s all out war. Tony is never one to back down from a challenge - even if he’s the one dropping the initial gauntlet. 

Who falls asleep last, watching the other with a small affectionate smile: Peter’s never been the best sleeper. It’s a little better now that Tony is around, but he’s still not that great at it. There are times when he can get right to sleep, usually when he’s spent and coming down from the fifth orgasm - and there are other times when he startles himself awake, or sits just at the edge of consciousness, his brain never quite hurtling over the peak of true rest. After realizing just how cute Tony looks when he’s slowly drifting off to sleep, Peter lets the sleeplessness aid him in watching Tony in the most unguarded moments the man will ever have. The older man does a really good job of taking care of him - but, it’s nice to see the softer side, too. 

Who lets the microwave play the loud beeping sound at 1am in the morning: In their new home in Cambridge, Tony installs a microwave that doesn’t beep - because Peter can’t hear it, anyway. Instead, the lights attached to it flash. Tony is free to make whatever noises he likes, but he respects Peter’s needs, too. He comes to find that the flash of light is much nicer, more peaceful. 

Who comes up with cheesy pick up lines: Always Tony. There’s like an innate feature within him that makes him feel the need to always be making lame jokes. It’s not with everyone, either. He’s stonewall with Steve and Bucky and the slightest bit affectionate with Happy - but he’s not out to impress them. No, he wants Peter’s attention on him, anything that will earn him that beaming smile. So, he makes puns and silly jokes - especially overtly lame and outlandish pick up lines. Literally anything Tony can do to get Peter to whole heartedly laugh, he’s is going to do it. 

Who rearranges the bookshelf in alphabetical order: Tony’s office space is meticulous, but there aren’t a lot of text books to speak of. The technologically brained man likes to keep all of his needed information on the tablet he keeps with him. Peter, on the other hand, is all about the tangibility of turning pages and taking notes - he catches grief about it from the older man constantly. The bookcase they built together houses all of Peter’s books, including the fantasy novels that he’s so very fond of. The books are sorted not only by alphabetical name, but by genre and subject matter, too. He likes to be organized, it helps. 

Who licks the spoon when they’re baking brownies: Peter’s not shy about his appetite, no matter how much he’s consumed in the small window of time he’s been eating. There are times when Tony has to limit his time in the kitchen when they’re baking - more of the stuff in the bowl makes it into Peter’s mouth than into the pan. There’s no chiding about raw eggs or sickness - Tony likes the fact that Peter is all over the brownie batter. When he kisses him later, Peter tastes sweet, the slightest hint of chocolate there and steadily present the entire time they press their lips together.

Who buys candles for dinners even though there’s no special occasion: Every time they eat food is a special occasion - though, they don’t always mark it as such. Aunt May is pretty consistent about the little care packages she sends him and the one he receives right before Christmas is stuffed to the gils with decorations and silly trinkets - long red candles included. For the three weeks it takes them to burn down to nothing, Peter and Tony eat their meals by candle light. Peter mentions how much they enjoyed them to May, so there’s a new set of them in every single package she sends his way from then on out. 

Who draws little tattoos on the other with a pen: Tony is terribly needy right around the time Peter starts to study for something. It’s like a sixth sense - he’s not seeing dead people, but he sure as hell is being distracting, his need for attention never ceasing. That is, of course, until he discovers just how good Peter’s skin looks with blue pen on it. Study sessions get a little easier after that, though Peter sacrifices his right arm for the sake of furthering his knowledge. The cuter ones, he doesn’t wash off right away - he lets the blue ink stick around until it fades naturally. 

Who comes home with a new souvenir magnet every time they go on vacation: Peter usually brings back postcards. What do you buy a man that could have anything he pleased in an airport gift shop? He decides that a marker of where he was traveling would be the best idea, so he sticks to it. The one time the Atlanta airport is out of postcards, he grabs a magnet instead. It becomes a thing to see where Tony proudly displays them after that. 

Who convinces the other to fill out those couple surveys in the back of magazines: Neither of them - they don’t need any further proof about how perfectly meant to be they are. 

you’re already home where you feel loved

a shirbert soulmate au (ao3)

-

Gilbert Blythe had grown up his entire life hearing he was special. Everyday someone told him something that apparently made him special, it ranged from the fact that he was good at sports to the fact that he was thoughtful. He used to believe them. At first it was hard too, he didn't understand why someone who was supposedly special had lost his mother before ever getting to know her. But then the years passed and he got used to hearing his name accompanied by a smile. 'Gilbert!' the boys would shout when he entered the schoolhouse or when he made the winning score at the game. 'Hi, Gilbert!' the girls would wave at him before erupting into a fit of giggles. 'Oh, Gilbert!' the older ladies would coo at him after church service. All of this made him puff out his chest and snicker when his father would tease him by calling him 'Avonlea's golden boy'.

Then his father got sick and he stopped feeling special. People no longer grinned after saying his name, they looked at him with sad eyes that made him want to scream. And so a part of him was glad when his father asked him to travel throughout Canada. When he got off the train in Alberta he actually breathed out a sigh of relief. He was no longer the golden boy, he was no longer special, he was no one. And as the days went by thoughts of himself ceased to fill his mind, his only concern was his father and spending every minute he could with him.

Gilbert tried not to think about the fact that his father's skin became paler, and his coughs more frequent and he wheezed in his sleep. He focused on the fact that his only family was still here. He focused on the conversations they had by the fireplace in their small cabin in the mountains, and listened intently to every word that was said. He spoke frequently of Gilbert's mother, so much so that Gilbert could picture her in his mind. He could even see the curly black tendrils that would escape her bun, his father had told him that putting those tendrils behind her ear was a pastime of his.

"Were you and mom...?" Gilbert asked his father one day. The older man immediately knew what his son was referring to.

"No." He answered curtly. "That's why you're special, Gil" He softened his voice.

The word irked him now that he hadn't heard it in almost two years. He didn't think there was anything special about the small dark mark he wore on his skin, just below his ribcage. When he was five years old he asked his father about it, little Gilbert thought it was a smudge of dirt that wouldn't go away, even after many baths. And that's when he heard the word soulmate for the first time. His father explained that not everyone was born with these marks, and that made him special (the beginning of the bothersome word for him). And so Gilbert came to understand that someone, somewhere had the exact same mark on their skin, and that person was his perfect pair.

He never spoke about his mark, he didn't want to draw even more attention to himself. Not even when they read stories about soulmates in school or when Mrs. Lynde announced at the church picnic that she didn't believe there was actually such a thing as soulmate marks. "Just something that a novelist came up with and we all believed." she had scoffed.

"I don't think having a birthmark makes me special, dad". Gilbert rebuffed.

"It's more than that and you know it."

After that he changed the subject.

------------

Three weeks before their two year anniversary of leaving Avonlea, his father's condition worsened. The strain on his chest became so much he could barely leave his bed without erupting into a debilitating coughing fit. They no longer spoke as much, speaking was hard for his father. So Gilbert read to him. Before that he wouldn't've called himself a lover of literature per se. He had read all his schoolbooks back when he went to school (oh how he missed it) but he never really opened a book unless it was for an assignment. His father on the other hand, loved poetry. "These poems helped me convince your mother to marry me, you know." His father chuckled at some faraway memory.

He appreciated poetry because it made him feel connected to his parents but the little books would often include mentions of little black marks too similar to his own and he felt his cheeks redden at the thought of ever feeling what these poets describe. So, when he heard the soft breaths of his father's indicating he had fallen asleep, he closed the little book and contented himself with watching the leaves fall from his window.

Two weeks before their two year anniversary of leaving Avonlea his father uttered four words that filled him with dread. "Let's go home, Gil." It wasn't the thought of returning to Avonlea that filled him with dread but what the fact meant. It meant his father didn't think he had much time left. His doctor didn't either. But Gilbert did, even as his father became more ill he held on to the stubborn hope that they had all the time in the world together.

A week before their two year anniversary of leaving Avonlea, they returned. Their orchard had managed to survive without any care for two years, and apples littered the ground beneath the trees. That Sunday they sat in front of the fireplace as they had done countless times before. "Are you excited for school tomorrow?" His father asked.

Gilbert furrowed his brow in confusion, he hadn't been to school in two years and he wasn't planning on going now. "I'm not going to school, I'm staying here and taking care of you and taking care of the orchard."

"Nonsense, Gil. Your job is not to take care of me, you should be going to school."

"I haven't been to school in two years, why should I start going now when I'm clearly needed here." Gilbert started becoming irate, though he tried not to show it. While he had missed going to school while they were traveling he wouldn't give up spending time with his father for the world, even more so now that his condition had worsened. There was also the subject of money to consider. His father never spoke of it but Gilbert knew the meagre savings they had lived of off while traveling had ran out and now that his father couldn't work Gilbert saw it was his responsibility to take care of the farm.

"Now we're home. Don't worry about me, Gil. I've written a letter to Mrs. Kincannon and she'll help out around here while you're at school." Gilbert wasn't happy with the decision, but he knew there was no changing his father's mind. That night Gilbert dusted off his old slate and gathered his things.

A nasty thought started to creep up on him. He started thinking of how behind he actually was, how he would go to school tomorrow and sit near the front of the classroom with the younger kids when he should be in the back studying for his Queen's entrance exams. He shook the thought away, he would've gladly missed 4 years of schooling for his father. Instead he thought of the positives, of all the things he would learn and the fun he would have (school would still be fun, right? He wasn't quite sure.) and drifted off with thoughts of tomorrow.

------------

Anne Shirley tried not to dwell on the sad aspects of life. She liked to smile at the sun and smell flowers and read. Oh how she liked to read. It was as if she could escape herself for a brief moment, and become someone else. She could be a princess, or a fair maiden, she didn't really care who she was, as long as she wasn't herself. She couldn't recall a time before she could read, she didn't even remember how she learned how to read. She figured her life only really began when she opened her first book.

She learned many things from books, her favorite fact being the existence of soulmates. The first time she read the term was in a romance novel, she figured it was a wonderful idea but not something grounded in reality, like mermaids. But then the term kept popping up in different books and would stay with her even after the books were closed. The day she read the word in a dictionary she gasped and jumped for joy. This was it, the sign that she needed. 'Soulmates: a person ideally suited to another as a close friend or romantic partner, characterized by the same birthmark on both persons'. That was the sign that meant that she would be happy someday, because there was someone out there who was ideally suited for her.

After learning this Anne developed the habit of stroking her left ankle whenever she felt particularly unhappy, because there, beneath her stockings, lay a small dark mark. That mark comforted her whenever the girls at the orphanage were keen on taking their anger out on Anne.

But even this small comfort wouldn't last her long. One day, right when Anne had gotten out of her bath, one of the older girls came into the room. She stared at Anne from her head to toes and opened her mouth, likely to tease Anne about her skinny frame again no doubt. Instead, she closed her mouth and drew her eyes to Anne's ankle. Then the girl started to laugh, though the laughter sounded forced and didn't reach her eyes.

"So that's why. That's why you think you're better than us. Lovely Princess Cordelia has a soulmate mark." The girl scoffed. She stepped forward and grabbed Anne by one of her braids, bringing her face close to hers. All Anne could do was try not to yelp at the pain. "Let me teach you something you'll never learn from your books, dear little Cordelia. That mark means nothing. You think you'll meet your soulmate? Fat chance. Soulmates aren't for girls like you. No one will ever love you, you'll be smart to remember that." And with that the girl threw Anne against the wall, she was unable to contain her pain at the blow. The older girl only laughed and left the room. After that Anne got back into the tub and scrubbed at her ankle as hard as she could, but the mark stayed. She tried not to look at it after that and decided to only read books with no mention of the horrid word.

Life went on. Anne left the orphanage and returned a handful of times before a mistake was made that would change Anne's life forever. She was sent to live with the Cuthbert's.

Anne's life there had its ups and downs but she was so sublimely happy that she hadn't thought of her mark at all. Until the school spelling bee where it was her against the insufferable Gilbert Blythe. "Spell Soulmate, Blythe." Mr. Phillips had instructed and Anne's breath caught in her throat. Surprisingly the boy wonder misspelled the word.

"Should've added the 'E'." He said to her afterwards, but she could barely register his words, her mind had returned to the orphanage. To that day when the older girl had told her no one would ever love her.

That night Diana stayed over at Green Gables and Anne couldn't help but confide in her dearest bosom friend what was plaguing her. When the candle was blown away and the moonlight couldn't come through the curtains and Anne could hide her shame.

"She was wrong. You know that, right Anne?" Diana had reassured her.

"I don't know that she was, Di." Anne replied, her voice trembling.

"She was, because I love you." Diana had turned to look at Anne.

"You do?" Diana merely nodded. And Anne finally realized that the older girl had been wrong. Maybe she was right in the fact that Anne would never experience romantic love. But she was loved. She was loved by Diana and Marilla and Matthew and that was enough for her.  

-

Anne was now 14 ('Soon to be 15!' she would announce to everyone whenever she could) and had been living in Avonlea for a year. She no longer dreaded going to school, she would skip down the stairs every morning and nearly race to the school. She loved being around Miss Stacy, and in the short time she had been teaching them Anne had realized that she wanted to be exactly like her when she grew up. When Anne and Diana arrived at the school the only person there other than Miss Stacy was Gilbert.

A lot had changed since she lost that spelling competition to him. His father had died and he left Avonlea for nearly a year. During that time she found herself looking at his empty desk and wishing he was there. At first she told herself that the only reason she wanted him back was so Ruby would stop crying during lunch time. Then Ruby actually did stop crying (she still talked about him, mind you) so Anne told herself she only wanted him to return so she could have an educational rival again. Eventually, she admitted to herself that she didn't really have a reason to want him back, she just missed him.

He finally came back and she really couldn't find a reason to hate him anymore. Though she still found him insufferable, this time for another reason entirely. He had always been good at school but now he had found his calling and didn't pay attention to anything that wasn't school related. He never sat with their fellow classmates during lunch or played with the boys, it was always just his nose in a book (Anne would never admit that her main issue with that was that he also wasn't paying attention to her).

Anne warmly greeted everyone with a general 'Good morning!' when she arrived, to which Gilbert merely lifted his palm in a wave, his eyes never once leaving his book. Anne rolled her eyes and took her seat. The other students started to file in and class quickly began.

A small tap on her shoulder distracted Anne from the lesson, it was Ruby. The girl handed her a note, her hand practically shaking in excitement. It could never mean something good when Ruby Gillis was this level of excited. 'Stay after school, we're playing a game. - Josie P.' the note read. Anne immediately shook her head no, she remembered the disaster that was the last game Josie Pye suggested and Anne didn't really find herself in the mood to be humiliated.

'Come on, Anne.' Ruby mouthed, Anne merely shook her head again.

A little while later the afternoon bell rang and everyone gathered their things, but instead of heading out the door like they usually did, they gathered in the back of the classroom and sat in a circle. It seemed Anne and Ruby weren't the only ones who received a note. Nevertheless, Anne headed out the door but before she was able to leave Ruby blocked the exit.

"Anne, please stay. Please please please. Gilbert's also staying and you know he never stays for these types of things. Come on, Anne." Ruby pleaded. Anne merely groaned and turned around.

"I just want it to be known, Ruby, that the only reason I'm doing this is because I know you'll complain about it for the next 10 days if I don't stay."

"Thank you thank you thank you!" Ruby jumped up and down and hugged Anne. Anne chuckled.

The girls reached the circle and it seemed the game had already started.

"What are we playing?" Ruby said as she sat down.

"Truth or dare." Josie replied with a smirk. Anne had to stifle another groan. Now Josie Pye had two different options for torture. She either made Anne answer an embarrassing question or she made Anne perform an embarrassing act. She was already regretting caving to Ruby's pleas.

The game went in typical truth or dare fashion. 'Who do you like?' and 'Who do you have a crush on?' being the two most popular questions. Anne had already made up her mind to choose dare when it was her turn. She guessed if Josie did ask her about her crush she could just say the truth. She didn't have a crush on anyone. But she had a feeling Josie would find a way to twist her answer into something everyone else would laugh at.

And Gilbert was sitting in front of her pretending he wasn't looking at her (Anne was also pretending she didn't notice his stares) and the last thing she wanted was a repeat of the spin the bottle fiasco in front of him.

"Truth or dare, Anne?" Josie asked her.

"Dare." Anne immediately replied.

Josie had a dare at the ready, because of course she did. "I dare you to walk across the schoolhouse roof."

The circle erupted in a chorus of 'oohs' and 'ah's' with a couple of people expressing their disapproval at the dare but not enough to make Josie take it back. The only person who stayed completely silent was Gilbert, he barely even reacted. 'He thinks I can't do it' Anne thought. 'Well I'll show him' and with that last thought she stood up and walked out of the classroom, everyone else hot on her trail.

She could do this, she climbed trees all the time. She even jumped out of her bedroom window once, and while the fall hurt a little bit, it wasn't anything she didn't get over. But as she looked up at the roof her heart started beating a little bit faster. She hadn't ever climbed a tree that high, and her bedroom window wasn't that high up either.

"Are you gonna be a scaredy cat, Anne?" Josie taunted her.

"Cut it out, Josie." Gilbert stepped in, to everyone's shock. He took a few steps forward until he was close to Anne, who had already started climbing the ladder. 'Why was there even a ladder here?' Anne thought. 'This really is an accident waiting to happen.'

Gilbert wrapped his hand around her leg, preventing her from continuing the climb. At the death stare she gave him he let go of her leg, but he didn't leave to join the others who were standing at the other side of the schoolhouse waiting to see Anne walk across the roof.

"You don't have to do this, Anne. It's just a stupid dare." Gilbert said, his eyes staring into hers and she found herself unable to look away. She hated when that happened because staring into Gilbert's eyes made her heart beat faster than the thought of walking across the schoolhouse roof ever did.

"Anne Shirley Cuthbert doesn't back out of a dare." Anne managed to get out with shaky breath. She tore her gaze away from his and continued to climb the ladder. When she finally got on the roof she found it hard to breath. Her classmates below looked awfully small and the steep roof wasn't the most stable surface. 'Here goes nothing' she thought as she took the first step.

She only managed to take two more steps before she lost her footing and fell. The fall so sudden she didn't have time to register anything but the searing pain on her ankle. Hot tears came to her eyes as she tried not to make any noise that would expose her injury.

All the other students ran to her, asking if she was okay but none of them knew what to do in the situation. All Diana could think to do was hold her best friends hand and yell at someone to get Matthew in Green Gables. Anne wasn't paying attention to her classmates, her attention too focused on her breathing. If she focused on her breath she wouldn't be able to focus on the pain on her ankle and the tears on her face.

Suddenly she saw a face in front of her, stopping her from counting her 11th breath since the fall. It was Gilbert. Under any other circumstance Anne would be annoyed and embarrassed if Gilbert saw her like this, breathing erratically and crying. But she remember that Gilbert wanted to be a doctor and that all he ever did was read medical texts and maybe he could help her in some way.

"Anne... Anne!" He snapped his fingers in front of her face to make her pay attention to him. She made a mental note to tell him later to never do that again. Anne looked at him, scared to open her mouth in fear that a sob would come out. "Anne, where does it hurt?" Gilbert asked her, his instincts kicking in.

"My ankle." Her voice cracked.

As Gilbert ran his hands through both her ankles she knew something was horribly wrong, she had twisted her ankle before and that pain was nothing compared to what she felt now.

"I think it might be broken, can I take off your boot?" Gilbert asked her, concern marring his features. Anne nodded.

Gilbert went on to unlace her boot and take it off, her stockings that had already pooled around her ankle going with it. "It's definitely broken, we need to get a doctor."

"Matthew's on his way." Diana added.

Gilbert continued moving around her ankle when suddenly he gave a small gasp. Anne hadn't dared look down in fear that maybe she would see bone sticking out where it shouldn't but she quickly realized what Gilbert had gasped at. Her mark. That exposure made her feel more vulnerable than all the shed tears.

"Gilbert let go of me." Anne had found it within her to stop crying and though the pain was still there the way Gilbert was looking at her made her want to run away. Alas, she could not do that. The next best thing was at least trying to hide her vulnerability. "Gilbert let go of me NOW!" She forcefully expressed when Gilbert still held on to her ankle. The boy jerked back as if he had been burned.

At that moment Matthew arrived on his buggy, and everyone forgot about Anne's outburst in favor of helping her get on the cart.

Four hours later Anne sat in the parlor in Green Gables. Her leg in a cast and her crutches leaning against the wall. She was no longer in pain but was plagued by a foul mood. Marilla had given her quite a verbal thrashing  about her recklessness and though she cried and cried Matthew had not come to her aid. She now sat staring out the window, incredibly bored. Her evening took a more exciting turn when she stopped the figure of Gilbert Blythe walking up to her front door. She wished she could go back to being bored and avoid any conversation Gilbert came here to have.

He heard him greet Marilla and exchange platitudes with her until finally he appeared before her, standing in the doorway.

"It's late, Gilbert." Anne said by way of greeting.

"I know, I just wanted to see how you were doing."

"Well, now you've seen me. I'm fine." Anne knew her tone was harsh but couldn't do anything to stop it. Maybe if she was rude enough he wouldn't ask what he actually wanted to.

"I'm glad. Anne I wanted to ask about what I saw on your ankle." He finally expressed.

Anne inhaled once trying to weigh her decisions on the spot. She could tell him it was exactly what he thought it was. But this would lead to two possible outlooks. Either he congratulates her for being lucky and moves on. Or he resents her for it, as many kids in the orphanage did, and he treats her differently. However delicate and sometimes somewhat tense their relationship was, she couldn't risk losing it. Not with him. So she chose to protect it, and herself.

"I don't know what you're talking about, the only thing you could've seen was my broken ankle." She puffed out.

Gilbert looked at her, in that special way of his that made her feel much too vulnerable. So she raised her eyebrows in silent question, 'Well?'.

"I guess my panic made me see things that weren't there. Sorry about that." He finally broke his gaze and turned to leave.

"Gilbert!" Anne suddenly blurted out. "Thank you." She said, she was honestly grateful that he was there that afternoon. He hadn't done anything but worry but looking back on it, his presence was a comfort.

"I'll always be there for you, Anne-girl." He looked down with a sheepish half smile and she did the same to try to hide the color that rose to her cheeks. They said their goodbyes and she watched him leave as she had watched him come.

------------

It was a scorching summer and everyone in the group was grateful that yesterday was the last day of school, the oppressive heat in the classroom not letting them concentrate. They were all having a picnic by Anne's dear Lake of Shining Water's when Moody came up with the idea and all the other boys immediately agreed because not even Ruby's delicious lemonade could help appease their suffering. One by one the boys unlaced their shoes, took off their shirts, and jumped in the lake. The girls didn't know whether to run, shriek, or jump in. So they simply laughed.

"Oh my mother would certainly faint if she saw this scene." Ruby squeaked, her excitement far outweighing her fear of her mother's reaction.

"You'll survive a scolding, Ruby. It's our last summer in Avonlea before we go off to Queens, we should take advantage of every second." Anne laid with her head on Diana's lap as she saw the scene that unfolded before her. The sun reflecting on the lake, the tall grass swaying in the breeze, her best friend running her hands through her hair. Avonlea was a treasure to Anne and she savored every sight, every smell, every touch. She had made it her goal this summer to have as many adventures as possible, she figured she already wasted last summer sitting in her parlor, her leg weighed down by her cast, she wasn't going to waste her last summer as a girl. Next summer she'd be a woman, a student of Queen's college.

"You're absolutely right, Anne." Ruby stood up, catching everyone's attention. Ruby started to unbutton her dress when all the girls stood up as well, trying to stop her.

"That's really not what I meant at all, Ruby." Anne pleaded.

"Take it from me, your reputation is a delicate thing. Don't tarnish it for an afternoon of fun." Josie tried to redo Ruby's buttons but the girl shook her off.

"I want to live, girls." Ruby proclaimed, standing only in her underthings. "Besides, this isn't too different to what the boys are wearing." She giggled, and with that final statement she ran to the lake and jumped. Ruby had grown bolder by the day ever since she showed up on the first day of school after winter break that year and announced to the girls that she was 'now officially over Gilbert Blythe.' All the boys stood still for a second, not being quite sure what to do, until Ruby splashed Moody's face and it was like nothing had changed at all. They all continued with their splashing and yelling and laughing.

All the girls had ran to the lakeside to get a closer look. Tillie and Jane shared a look. "Oh what the hell." The girls chorused before taking off their shoes and jumping in as well. They still wore their dresses, not feeling quite as adventurous as Ruby.

"It seems everyone has truly lost their minds. I'm going home. Diana, you coming?" Josie asked. Before Diana could answer Gilbert came out of the lake and sat down on a nearby rock. It was everything Anne could do to look anywhere but Gilbert's naked torso.

"You girls coming in?" Gilbert's teasing smile adorned his face. She had become quite fond of that little smile. Sometimes during their many study sessions she would pretend she still didn't understand a geometry question, just to see that little smile while he explained for the third time. She was also guilty of making up homework just so she would have an excuse for Marilla to let her go to Gilbert's house. Not that she often needed one, the Blythe's and the Lacroix's and the Cuthbert's had practically become one family. The use of the front door had been forgone and Bash had taken to calling Anne 'Aunty Anne' whenever he talked to Delphine about her.

"Certainly not." Josie huffed and took off.

"What about you, Carrots? Aren't you jumping in?" Gilbert knew exactly what he was doing, that nickname never failed to make her smile. She didn't really remember when it stopped irking her and started making her smile. She supposed it was late last year, she was feeding Delphine while Gilbert and Bash worked outside. She was also trying to surprise them with dinner. It seemed she got a bit too carried away playing with little Delly that her stew started pouring over, by the time she got to the stove the stew jumped and exploded all over her, her clothes, and the kitchen floor. Only Delphine was safe, as she laughed at the mess from the other side of the kitchen. 'What on God's Earth did you get yourself into this time, Carrots?' He had been unable to hide his smile and she had been unable to keep herself from bursting into laughter.

"Wouldn't you just love that?" They joked like that often. She had come to know a side of Gilbert that she didn't think a lot of people knew, and she absolutely loved. No one could argue that Gilbert Blythe wasn't the perfect gentleman, and entirely too selfless. But not a lot of people could say that he was funny. Anne could. Gilbert joked about himself all the time, self deprecating and self-adulating in the same amount. ('I mean I don't even know why all the girls in Avonlea are head over heels for you' she had said while they picked apples. He stopped and looked at her 'I mean, have you seen me, Carrots? Seriously?' She burst out laughing at that.)

So she had taken to joking around with him in the same way. ('Gil, I think we need to talk about your obsession with me.' She said to him when he arrived unannounced at Green Gables for the fourth day in a row. 'You wish. The conversation we should be having is about my obsession with Marilla's cream puffs.') Sometimes a joke wouldn't perform as intended and the air between them would became heavy with things unsaid. She would never tell him that when he joked about how she loved his hair, he was right. And he would never tell her that she actually was his main reason for going to Green Gables.

"I would." He dropped the teasing smile and looked at her solemnly. It reminded her of the way he looked at her right before she walked the schoolhouse roof and like she did that day, she felt the need to interrupt his gaze. She took all of him in, from his pants rolled up to the knee, to his wet curls sticking to his forehead. She noticed his broad shoulders and her gaze lowered, to a tiny dark mark just below his ribcage. She felt dizzy.

"I need to go." Anne didn't wait for anyone's response and just started walking as fast as she could. She could hear Diana running after her and calling her name but she couldn't bring herself to stop or the slow her pace.

Finally Diana caught up to her. "Hey, what was that all about? What happened to taking advantage of every second in Avonlea?"

"I-I couldn't stay there, Diana. I-I saw him and I saw something I shouldn't've seen, I'm not even sure what it is that I even saw but what if it is what I think it is an-"

"Slow down, Anne. Tell me what's going on." Diana tried to calm her friend.

When Anne felt she had put enough distance between her and the lake she stopped walking and turned to Diana. "You saw that birthmark Gilbert had?"

"Yeah, it looked like a soulmate mark but I'm not sure, I didn't take a good look."

"I don't know what it is, Di. But I have the exact same mark on my ankle." Anne silently pleaded for her friend to understand what she was trying to say, she didn't have the strength to say it out loud. When understanding finally etched itself on Diana's face, Anne started walking again.

"You have a soulmate mark on your ankle, Anne. You've told me about it and I've seen it. I know it's not a birthmark."

Anne couldn't form thoughts coherent enough for a reply so she just kept on walking. "Does this mean that you and Gilbert are soulmates?" Diana asked.

"I don't know what any of this means, Di." Anne finally saw Green Gables coming up the hill and said goodbye to her friend.

That night Anne poured over every romance novel she could find, including the ones she swore off years ago, and all of them had their main characters having some sort of grand revelation but Anne didn't feel any differently than she did yesterday. She loved spending time with Gilbert, that was much obvious. She couldn't say she didn't find him handsome, he's an objectively handsome boy... or man, she guessed. She could even admit (if only to herself) to having a small crush on Gilbert. But love? That was something else entirely. How was she to know what love was? But love was what she was supposed to feel for her soulmate. She had to feel it even without seeing the marks. And she had known Gilbert for a long time, if he really was her soulmate she should've felt something akin to the books by now.

Anne finally got her mind to quiet down nearing 4 in the morning, only to be woken up by the sun a couple of hours later. She begged Marilla to let her stay home from church that Sunday but Marilla would not relent. "Are you sick?" Marilla help a hand to Anne's forehead.

"...No." "Then you will go to church and thank the Lord for your health. Go get changed."

Anne did thank God when they got to the church, she thanked him because Gilbert hadn't been there when they got there, so she didn't have to talk to him. She still didn't know what to say to him 'Hey, I think we might be soulmates but we also might not be because I don't think I'm in love with you'. That probably wouldn't work. She also could pretend she didn't even see his mark and go back to normal but she didn't think that was a possibility anymore. She didn't know how to be around him anymore.

After church Marilla usually stuck around to talk to Bash and Mrs. Lynde but Anne took the opportunity to hop on the buggy with Matthew, Gilbert looking at her retreating figure in confusion.

The following day the Queen's study group was meeting at the schoolhouse to go over the topics for the entrance exam and Anne had already devised a plan for avoiding Gilbert. She spent the entire morning helping everyone else and when Gilbert asked her to read over his essay she quickly lied and told him she was too busy. This went on for the next few days. Anne had only gone four days without properly talking to him and she already missed him. She told herself this was a good thing, she had to get used to not being around him, they weren't going to be together at Queen's.

Anne tried to go a fifth day without talking to him but he made it impossible. Anne had been in the kitchen, trying to make bread, when Gilbert burst in through the kitchen door. Anne wasn't at all surprised, Marilla had assured Gilbert there was no need for him to knock anymore and he had listened to her. At the time it warmed her heart to see him come in with such familiarity, as if he was entering his own home. Now it only reminded her that she couldn't even look a mess in her house. Which she certainly did now. Flour covered every inch of her, it was caught in her braids, and in her dress, and on her face.

"I know you like to think you live here but you don't so try knocking next time." Anne kept on kneading her dough as she said this.

Gilbert was taken aback at her harshness, but persisted. "Sorry... It's just... You've been avoiding me, Anne. Why?"

"I haven't been doing anything, I've just been busy. Do you need anything or did you just come here to tell me you need attention?" Anne tried her hardest to keep her voice steely. She knew he would notice if she faltered, and if she faltered she would have to tell him the real reason she wasn't talking to him. She wasn't ready for that.

"Can we not do this right now, Anne?" Gilbert sighed.

"Do what?"

"This thing where you try to push me away. I'm tired of it from last year, and this time I'm not leaving so there's no point in trying." He moved closer to her. "You know you can tell me anything. What's going on with you?" His hands covered hers, stopping her from continuing with her kneading.

Her breath caught in her throat. "I can't talk about it right now, Gil." Her facade had been broken.

"I understand that. Tell me when you're ready. Just please don't keep avoiding me, I missed my best friend." He wrapped her arms around her and Anne felt like crying, though she didn't really know why.

"You're all covered in flour now." Her voice cracked. She held back her tears but the lump in her throat kept getting bigger.

"That's alright." He said softly. "I guess I'll just have to help you with this bread now." And that's what he did. They spent the rest of the afternoon baking, few words exchanged between them. He had gone to see her because she wasn't talking to him but standing there in the kitchen, her hand brushing against his as they worked the dough, he realized it wasn't just the conversation he missed. He missed the connection. They had somehow become a unit, there was no Gilbert without Anne.

As he walked back to his house his mind wandered to the day she broke her ankle after falling from the schoolhouse roof. He had told himself that he had imagined it. That whatever he had seen on her ankle that day was not a mark identical to his. It was just wishful thinking. If they were soulmates it would explain why he had felt so drawn to her since they met.

He rubbed the side of his face remembering the bruise that had formed there after she hit him with her slate that first day they met. Even though she tried her hardest to push him away, all he wanted was her attention. This need he had for her went on, even after he left Avonlea. Anne was the last thing on his mind after his father died but he would get struck by the though 'What is Anne doing right now?' as he shoveled coal or snuck into the upper deck to gaze upon the horizon.

Working on the ship taught him a lot. After seeing a lot of the world he figured there was more to life than worrying about a certain red headed girl ignoring him, he focused solely on his future. Until his brother got married, then he figured his future could wait. And he hadn't regretted that decision once. He thought of all the things he would've missed if he had left. He wouldn't've been there for all of Delly's firsts. He wouldn't've been able to get to know Mary before she left them, in the year he had with her he had cared for her as a sister, or maybe a surrogate mother. He wouldn't've gotten as close as he had with Anne.

Anne become a fixture of his life. He knew her, in a way that maybe he didn't know anyone else, maybe only Bash. She was his closest friend. And he always left it at that, friends. But sometimes when he saw her in a certain light or when she would laugh so hard her eyes would close, he felt a tug at his chest and wondered if what he felt for her was more than friendship. But then she would finish a sentence of his without even thinking about it and he would go back to being sure, they were friends. He had never heard of romantic partners having a relationship like theirs. What they had was special, and couldn't be sullied by adding anything more to it.

When he got home he found Bash with Delphine on his hip, trying to stir some soup. "Come on let me do that." Gilbert said, taking the spoon from his hand.

Bash tried to tell him about his day in the orchard but the words didn't seem to stick, his mind still hung up on Anne. "Where's you head at, Blythe? You haven't heard a word I've said." Bash protested.

"Sorry, Bash... I just... Can I ask you something?" He forgot about the soup and sat in the chair across from Bash. Bash nodded. "Were you and Mary soulmates?" Gilbert asked.

A rueful smile crossed Bash's face. It no longer hurt him to talk about Mary the way it once did. He missed her but now he wouldn't weep whenever he thought of her. "We were. Though we didn't find out until our wedding night. It didn't matter to us anyway, it was just a happy surprise."

"Didn't you at least have a feeling that she was your soulmate before you married her?"

"No, I just knew I loved her. And I would've continued to love her even if she wasn't my soulmate. Had I met a woman the next day with a matching mark the end result would still be the same. Mary was my person." Bash answered.

"How did you know you loved her? How could you be sure it was love and not anything else?" Gilbert continued with his questions.

"It just felt right, you know? I was eating dinner in her house and talking to her and I just felt at ease, and I knew that's what I wanted to do and how I wanted to feel for the rest of my life. That make sense, Blythe?"

Gilbert just nodded. It did make sense.

"Anything you wanna tell me?" Bash asked, his usual teasing smirk coming back to his face.

"Nope." Was all that Gilbert replied before standing up and returning his attentions to the soup.

-----

Anne knew she needed to make sense of her feelings. Whenever she was unsure of something she usually talked to Gilbert about it, but obviously that wasn't an option with the topic at hand. She tried talking to Diana, and while her bosom friend had tried to help her, she was a bit out of her depths, never having experienced anything close to what Anne was describing.

Anne decided to talk to someone who she knew would have answers. After the Queen's study group was dismissed, Anne decided to stay behind to talk to Miss Stacy.

"What can I help you with, Anne?" Miss Stacy sat on her desk while Anne leaned on the desk behind her.

She wasn't sure how to approach the subject so she decided to just jump right in. "You were friends with your husband, right?"

Miss Stacy was taken aback at the question but not much surprised anymore when it came to Anne. "I was." She chuckled a bit. "He was my best friend." Miss Stacy continued.

"How did you know you wanted to stop being his friend and wanted to become his wife?" Anne asked, earning a laugh from the teacher.

"It doesn't work like that, Anne! He was always my friend, especially when we got married. I believe friendship is the most important aspect of a marriage. Oh I had so much fun with my darling." Miss Stacy's smile only got wider as she continued to speak.

"Then how do you know when your feelings for someone are... romantical?"

"I know the answer I'm about to give you is probably going to be most unsatisfactory, but it is the truth. You just know. If you're confused now there will come a moment when you'll just know. You'll know whether this person is simply a good friend, or more than that." Miss Stacy was right, her answer did not satisfy Anne but she wanted an answer and an answer she was given.

"Thank you, Miss Stacy." The teacher went on to embrace her favorite student in a hug.

"I'll miss you when you're at Queen's." She whispered in Anne's ear.

"I'll miss you too." Anne replied.

Before Anne could exit the schoolhouse Miss Stacy called her for one last thing. "If it helps, I do think whoever is giving you these confusing feelings, is also having some confusing feelings of his own." She had noticed a certain Blythe boy moping around her classroom for a few days when a certain redhead wasn't talking to him.

Anne pretended she didn't know what Miss Stacy was talking about and left.

Anne still needed to think, so she went to her favorite thinking place. The cliff. She sat on the edge as the tall grass tickled her legs and wind mussed her braids. It wasn't long before she heard steps coming toward her. She smiled at the sound, how funny it was that she could tell exactly who it was just by the sound of his steps. He took a seat next to her.

"Marilla told me you'd be here." Gilbert said.

"Think of the devil..." Anne smiled at him.

"You thinking about me, Carrots?" Gilbert mirrored her expression.

"I was merely thinking, something you never let me do. I knew it wouldn't be long until you showed up here."

Gilbert suddenly turned serious. "I can leave if you want."

Anne shook her head. "You know your presence is always welcome by me, Gil."

He nodded. "So what were you thinking about?" He asked her.

Anne thought of a multitude of lies she could tell him but she decided to just tell him the truth. The moment was so peaceful she thought nothing could ruin it.

"I think we might be soulmates." She turned to look at him. His expression didn't change and he didn't say anything. He just sat there waiting for her to continue.

"You're not surprised?" She asked him.

He shook his head. "I had a feeling. I wasn't really sure, I'm still not, but I thought we might be. That day you broke your ankle, I could've sworn I saw your soulmate mark but it was so quick, and you pulled away, and there were other things to think about, I figured I imagined it. But then you started avoiding me after seeing my mark and I started thinking about it again." Anne opened her mouth to protest but Gilbert replied before she could even speak. "I know you saw my mark, Anne. I saw you checking me out at the lake."

Anne burst out laughing at this. "I was not checking you out!"

"You kind of were." Gilbert laughed. "But anyway, whether we are soulmates or not it doesn't really matter." He continued.

"Why not?" She asked.

"Because it won't change how I feel about you." He replied earnestly. He gazed at her in a way he had done many times, but looking at him now, she was sure his eyes held the answer to the question she was about to ask.

"How do you feel about me?"

"I love you." He said without hesitation. "And I'll continue to love you in any way you'll let me. If friendship is all you'll allow then I'll love you like a best friend until you no longer stand the sight of me. Though I'll probably still keep on loving you after that. Or if you'll allow it, I'll love you like a husband. I just want to be with you, Anne."

She understood Miss Stacy then. She knew in that moment she loved him. She couldn't imagine a life where Gilbert Blythe wasn't there to tease her and comfort her. She couldn't imagine ever wanting to be with someone the way she always wanted to be with him.

"I want to be with you too, Gil. Always. I love you." She said softly.

Gilbert didn't waste another moment after that, he closed the space between them and kissed her. It wasn't passionate, as they kept breaking the kiss to smile, but they wouldn't have it any other way.

They sat there, staring at the horizon. Anne's head on Gilbert's chest, his arms wrapped around her. It was as if Anne found the missing key. This was the only thing missing between them.

"Even though it doesn't matter, I do think we need to resolve the whole soulmate issue." Anne said, breaking their silence. "Let me see your mark." She said, tugging at his suspenders.

"Anne Shirley Cuthbert are you trying to get me to take my clothes off? Just what do you think Marilla would say?" He feigned shock.

"Oh come on, Gil!" She laughed. "Here I'll go first." She unlaced her boot and took off her stocking, the action reminding her of that fateful day outside the schoolhouse. Gilbert followed her lead and tugged his shirt over his head.

She inspected his mark and inspected hers. She ran her fingers over his mark and over hers and he did the same. Then Anne did something very uncharacteristic of her. She squealed. She squealed and wrapped her arms around his neck, the force of it making them both tumble to the ground. She went on to pepper him with kisses wherever she could. His cheek, his jaw, his neck, his collarbone, and finally a peck to his lips.

"I'm really glad it's you, Anne-girl." Gilbert said against her hair.

"There could never be anyone for me but you, Gilbert." She kissed him again. She would probably have trouble not kissing him after today.

But Gilbert was usually was the voice of reason between the pair and today was no different. He realized if anyone were to stumble upon them, that person would stumble upon quite a scene. Anne laying on top of him, kissing him, missing a shoe and a stocking, and Gilbert below her, kissing her, missing a shirt. "I should probably put my shirt back on."

"I'm becoming a fan of this shirtless Gilbert." Anne said sitting up. Gilbert only gave her a look.

A few hours later Gilbert dropped Anne off at Green Gables. She felt like she was walking on air.

"What's gotten into you, child?" Marilla chastised her when she took too long to set the table for dinner.

"Oh Marilla I'm in love." Anne said when they were all at the table. Matthew choked a little bit on his water but a few pats on the back from Anne and he was fine.

"I'm happy for you, Anne. But you must keep your head, your chores can't be ignored just because you're daydreaming." Marilla reminded her.

"Yes, Marilla. Oh but aren't you going to ask me who I'm in love with?" Anne continued.

Marilla scoffed. "I've seen you two making eyes at each other enough times right here in this very table to not know it's Gilbert Blythe making you crazy."

"We're soulmates."

Marillas eyes widened at that. "You are?" She asked. Anne nodded.

Marilla held out her hand over the table and squeezed Anne's hand. Matthew gave a kiss to Anne's temple and she felt oh so grateful for her parents.

Back at the Blythe-Lacroix homestead Gilbert was having a similar conversation.

"Hey, Bash. Guess what?" Gilbert said as soon as he opened the door. Gilbert nearly skipped on his way home from Green Gables and his cheeks hurt from smiling so much. Bash raised an eyebrow, expecting an answer. "I found out who my soulmate is today." Gilbert revealed.

Bash's face made quick work into turning his frown into a smirk. "Oh really? And who, pray tell, is the unlucky gal?" Bash had placed both his hands on the table, ready to get up from his seat any minute now.

Gilbert decided wait a few seconds before answering, it was his turn to torture Bash a little bit. "... Anne Shirley Cuthbert."

Bash sprung out of his seat and began doing his little dance. All Gilbert could do was roll his eyes. "Nearly three years later, Blythe. I was right all along. So you figured out part one, she's your soulmate, have you figured out part two yet?"

"What's part two?" Gilbert asked.

"Figuring out you're in love with her." Bash replied.

"Ah, it seems I figured out part two before I figured out part one." At that Bash let out another whoop and engulfed Gilbert in a hug.

"I'm happy for you, brother. You found the one, now don't mess it up."

"Why do you always have to add that little bit of venom." Gilbert complained, though he wasn't at all upset. He embraced Bash's teasing, it reminded him that the man that he had met in the most unexpected of places, really had become his brother.

"It's my job, Blythe." Bash laughed and left to get Delphine from her crib, doing his little dance every step of the way.

----------

The next morning while Anne was having breakfast there was a knock on the door. "Gilbert Blythe since when do you knock?" She heard Marilla say. She quickly gulped down her milk and went to the door.

"Anne reminded me the other day I need to mind my manners." Gilbert said, eyes piercing straight into Anne's. "Marilla may I walk Anne to the school for our Queen's study session?" Gilbert continued.

Both Anne and Marilla were shocked and rendered speechless. Gilbert had never asked for Marilla's permission for anything regarding Anne, he would simply show up and ask if she was there.

"Well I guess you'll have to ask her." Marilla said. She returned to the dinning room after that, not wanting to be witness to another round of youthful gazing between the new couple.

Anne raised her eyebrow at her Gilbert. "What's with all this newfound formality?" She asked him.

"Just wanted to begin our courtship the proper way. May I walk you to the school, Anne?"

Anne rolled her eyes at him. "You may. Let me get my things."

Once they were on the path to the school, walking the same way they had done dozens of times. Anne holding on to the crook of his elbow, letting go every once in a while to pick a flower or stroke a leaf, and Gilbert holding both of their books, she asked him a question. "What's all this about a courtship now?"

"After yesterday's events I thought we should start making things a little more... serious. I mean you're 16 and we've been lucky enough until now to have been friends this close and not have any rumors spread." Gilbert explained.

"It's just courtships are so stiff and formal and there's so many rules, you know we'd need to get a chaperone if we were to follow the rules correctly. And you're right, I am 16, much too young to be dealing with anything as serious as a courtship."

Gilbert stiffened at her explanation. "Does that mean you want to go back to just being friends?"

"No! It means I want us to be the same us we've always been. With a few new things thrown in." To make her point she grabbed him by the neck and pulled him in for a kiss.

"You're incorrigible, Carrots." Gilbert murmured against her lips.

---------

Anne's time that summer was divided between spending time with Diana and studying for the Queen's entrance exam with Gilbert. And the day had finally arrived, in a few minutes she would be taking her exam.

Diana had gone over to Green Gables that morning to wish her luck and try to settle her nerves. It saddened Anne to think that Diana wouldn't be accompanying her in this new adventure, but she knew that distance wouldn't weaken their friendship. Diana was her kindred spirit and Anne always thought of her as her second soulmate, even before she knew who her actual soulmate was.

Now she sat in the examination room, her paper in front of her. Gilbert sat on the other side of the room and offered her a reassuring smile. 'You've got this.' He mouthed. In a surprising turn of events Anne had decided when she woke up that she did not want to speak with Gilbert until after the exam. If he tried to study some more it would only make her more nervous and if they talked about something else it would only distract her.

When the examiner finally let them turn their papers all thoughts of Gilbert or Diana or anything else left her mind. And all she focused on were the answers to the questions on that paper. She recalled every single one of Miss Stacy's lessons and every equation written on her slate, and every late night study session. And somehow her nerves left her. She finished the exam and stood up and left, Gilbert's eyes following her as she moved.

A few minutes later Gilbert joined her at the bench she was sitting, right outside of the building where they had taken the exam. They were the only two that had finished.

"How did you do?" They both asked simultaneously.

"I think I did fine, but we'll just have to see." Anne answered.

"You're the smartest girl in school, Anne. I'm sure you did great. I think I did alright, but like you said, we'll just have to see."

"You're the smartest boy in school, Gil. I'm sure you did great." Anne reassured him, a smile on her face.

A month later they both found out. All the students gathered in the school for the last time to find out their exam results. Not for the first time that summer, Anne felt quite nostalgic standing there. Avonlea had become her whole life, and if she had managed to pass this exam, in a few weeks she would be leaving.

"Anne!" Ruby's voice brought Anne out of her reverie. "You and Gilbert tied for first place!" Her friend informed her.

"We did?!" Anne asked, nearly jumping for joy. She had a feeling she had passed the test but never in a million years would she had thought she would get first place. Well, tied for first place, but that was a technicality.

In that moment Gilbert grabbed her from behind and twirled her around. "Guess all those study sessions paid off, huh?"

The pair had decided they wouldn't follow the traditional courting rules, and while everyone around them was initially shocked at they way they behaved (and Anne had received many a scolding from Mrs. Lynde) they eventually moved on, another small town gossip taking everyone by storm.

"And here I thought those were just an excuse so you could spend time with me." She teased.

"Two birds one stone, Carrots." Gilbert said, making her laugh. Anne's laugh was one of Gilbert's favorite sounds, all he ever wanted to do was make her laugh.

Moody Spurgeon, klutz with a heart of gold, had decided that this was a momentous occasion, and they couldn't ignore it. "Come on, guys! This is the last time we will ever be together like this, we have to do something to commemorate it." He said once they had all learned their results and left the schoolhouse.

Anne had stayed a few minutes. She wanted to say goodbye to the place that had seen her grow up, a place that had seen her cry and laugh, the place where she officially met her soulmate. But most importantly, she wanted to say goodbye to Miss Stacy. Anne told Miss Stacy how much of an inspiration she was to her and Anne had shed a few tears when the older woman held her close and told her she was her favorite student.

"I'm so glad I met you, Anne Shirley Cuthbert." The teacher told her as she wiped her tears away. They had said their goodbyes and Anne waved as Muriel Stacy sped off in her motorbike.

"Okay, everyone. Let's meet by the lake in an hour, I'll bring the moonshine." Moody was giddy and his mood was quickly becoming contagious so everyone decided to do as Moody said. A couple of the girls went home to get some blankets, and Charlie Sloane headed off somewhere to get another bottle of moonshine, much to Anne's surprised. 'Guess people never stop surprising you.' She thought.

"I have to say I am a bit excited to see you under the effects of Moody's moonshine." Gilbert said. He and Anne walked hand in hand towards the lake.

"I have to say you'll be disappointed. Drunk Anne just happens to talk a bit more and laugh a bit more."

Gilbert looked at her in shock. "You've been drunk?! Does Marilla know about this?"

"Oh unfortunately she does, she was witness to the mess. Have I not told you this story?" Anne said, Gilbert shook his head. Anne went on to tell him all about that time when she and Diana, at the tender age of 13, got drunk on wine, thinking it was raspberry cordial. Gilbert laughed as she told him repeatedly "It was not on purpose, Gil. I genuinely thought thought it was raspberry cordial!"

These were the moments he cherished more than anything. Just talking to Anne. He wanted to know her completely. He wanted to know every embarrassing memory and every strange thought, all of it delighted him.

"What about you, huh? I have a hard time believing Mr. Global and Bookish here didn't have at least a sip of something while traveling the world." Anne asked him.

"The first time I drank some of Bash's rum I threw up. The second time I also threw up, granted it was after three glasses but still. In the morning Bash told me I tried to join a band that was playing in the street, I don't know how to play any instrument. After that I thought it best if my short-lived relationship with alcohol came to an end." Anne laughed trying to imagine 16 year old Gilbert attempting to play the drums. She made a mental note to ask Bash to tell her the extended version of that story sometime.

An hour and a half later all the classmates sat around the many blankets provided by the girls. They all reminisced and told stories while the second bottle of moonshine was passed around, the first one lay forgotten in a corner of one of the blankets, it was empty. 'You guys remember when we hopped a freight to save Miss Stacy?' 'Or when Prissy nearly married Mr. Phillips, what was that about?' Jane scrunched her nose up at that. 'Or who could forget when Gilbert came back from traveling around Canada only to be greeted by a slap in the face with Anne's slate?' Anne blushed at the memory, or maybe she blushed at Gilbert's kiss to her cheek.

It was nearing twilight, fireflies flew around them, and the breeze was blowing in a way that could only mean summer was coming to an end. But Anne felt warm all over. She couldn't tell if it was from the many layers of blankets around her, the many many sips of moonshine she had taken, or simply Gilbert's arms around her. But even her heart felt warm. In that moment she felt so content. Her best friend lay next to her, Diana's head near Anne's feet. The girls had called upon Diana to join their farewell gathering and the girl nearly drank half of the first bottle with a grimace. "The wine was much better, wasn't it Anne?" Diana said to her, even though her speech was slurred, she spoke in soft tones.

"Yes it was, Diana." Anne replied.

The conversation in the group had faded out, people opting to speak in smaller groups or simply just enjoy the sunset, not speaking at all. The alcohol hadn't made them wild and rowdy, like Moody had predicted, but rather slow and lazy. It felt as though the slightest movement of Anne's body required enormous amount of strength, so the wisest choice seemed to not move at all. Her head was against Gilbert's chest, his steady heartbeat in her ears, like the sweetest melody. Anne chuckled at the sound of Diana's soft snores, it seems she was the first fallen soldier. But no one made a move to wake her. She moved her eyes forward and saw Ruby in a similar position, her eyes were closed and Anne couldn't tell whether she was asleep or not. The difference between her and Diana being that Ruby laid with her head on Moody's lap. That day at the lake was only the beginning of something.

Anne's childhood hadn't been perfect but that moment of complete tranquility and immeasurable happiness seemed to make up for every single tear she ever shed. She was now ready for the future.

How A Stolen Book Changed My Life

(Also known as "Dragon Knights Saved My Life") It started on a day somewhere between late 2006 and very early 2007. I was 16 and in high school and convinced my parents to stop by the library in town instead of the one nearest my house. I was looking for some manga and I knew they had some. It was a paltry little offering, just a handful of volumes in a short shelf. A few random Yugioh volumes, some Dragon Ball Z, a few stray volumes of Naruto. Nothing caught my eye in particular so I decided to just pick at random. I grabbed a volume of Yugioh, another of some shoujo dream something or other and 2 volumes of a manga called Dragon Knights, volumes 22 and 23 respectively, the only ones they had. I recall flipping through the pages trying to determine which held more interest as I sat in the car while my family went into Walmart to do a little shopping. I don't recall much about the shoujo dream manga except that it had 'dream’ somewhere in the title and the Yugioh volume was just something to flip through to compare to the anime I had already seen. I had high hopes for that shoujo manga but it sadly disappointed (didn't help that it was volume 2 and I'd never even read volume 1.) So I read through character profiles and 'the story thus far’ in the Dragon Knights manga, having a hard time fitting faces from the older volumes artwork in the profiles with the newer style artwork in the books I had. It was going to be a 26 volume series and I had borrowed volumes 22 and 23 having never heard of nor read the earlier books. I was at a loss to the storyline even with the summary in the front of the book, none of the “main” characters seemed to be around much in these 2 books. But one caught my eye, a character named Gil. As it turns out I just happened upon 2 of the 4 books of the entire 26 volume series that focuses on this character! And I had no idea how that happenstance would change my life. Needless to say I fell in love with this character. I began to draw him, make up stories in my head with him, want to know more about him (ahh the trouble of loving a side character in a little known series!), read fanfiction about him. I wound up finding every Dragon Knights related website and forum I could searching for more information. I was obsessed. I tried my best to get my hands on the other volumes he featured in first before eventually trying to collect the entire series. I fell fast and I fell hard. This was my new favorite character, my new obsession to draw and trace and print and read and write and search about. I wanted any and everything Gil! But these were library books, they had to be returned in 2 weeks. But… I couldn't give them up now! Not when I had fell in love! There were no bookstores where I lived. My parents didn't have a credit card to order books online. The library was my only connection! I had never stolen anything in my life. I loved libraries! I knew how frustrating it was to want a book that someone borrowed from the library but never returned! But… this felt like fate! This was my soulmate made from ink! And so… I didn't return them. I kept them. Marked out the barcodes with Sharpies to match the book covers. Since I was the one who always checked the mail on my way home, I destroyed every letter from the library about fines so my parents would never know. I stayed nervous that they would still find out somehow though. That they'd be mad that I'd stole and that they'd have to pay hefty fines. Within two years though, another letter from the library arrived. My gut sunk with fear. They were going to get me now and lock me up in library thief jail! But instead the letter mentioned National Library Week and came with an amazing note: in celebration they had decided to forgive my fines. I was free! $50 in fines was something I no longer had to worry about! The books were mine and my parents would owe nothing for them or my sin! But the fire Gil sparked in me rose still, being an artist type this eventually led me to DeviantArt and posting a bit of my art and finding others fanart of my beloved Gil. I went onto a Dragon Knights forum and a Dragon Knights guild on Gaia Online. I was too shy and new to the series to speak up much but I remembered some of the recurring usernames from site to site. Time passed, I graduated, I moved to DC, started art school, wound up broke, lonely, depressed and severely in debt, I moved back to KY, I started community college, I used my tuition grant money to finally get internet at my home. I eventually caved and followed a few of my friends in joining Tumblr. I went there cause my friends had (for the time) abandoned to their Facebook's to congregrate on this new site and because my newest obsession, Magi, had lots of dedicated blogs and information located there. So I joined and then realized one of the recent Dragon Knights 'sites’ I had been following was actually a Tumblr blog! So I quickly followed it as my steadfast Gil obsession had never really lulled. Some more time passed and I graduated college and moved a few hours away to start my first real job. It was then that things went horrifically, wonderfully, horribly, wrong and so, so right! I started having anxiety attacks and a fellow member of the Dragon Knights (and Gil) fandom whose name I remembered over all those years had started messaging me right about the same time. This person's elder sibling had gone through similar things and so they were the first to reach out a helping hand and understanding heart full of advice and comraderie. And they continued to reach out. We became friends. I became friends with a few other Dragon Knights peeps as well. And then I fell in love with this helpful fellow fan. And then things went to hell. I started to become increasingly depressed, having more and more anxiety attacks. I began to self harm for the first time. I constantly planned out my own suicide. Through all of this, my new internet friend was there. Sometimes my episodes were because of him. I was new to the feelings of love and jealousy and obsession (with real people at least) and the hurt that comes with living alone, with not knowing where you fit in the world, with not knowing how you fit in this other person's life and what to do with all these new overwhelming feelings while also trying to find a new job and pay the bills and prove I could do this thing on my own. My emotions were a swirling rollercoaster ride from Hell but somehow, some way, he rode through them with me. He rode through them with cute little drawings of Gil, and fun games to distract me from my pain, comforting words, and plans to meet at a large anime con. We met. I was still in love but he was not. It hurt to be turned down but his presence was something I still loved having in my life. It was something that, through all the emotions and hurt and blood and suicide attempts, was still somehow there. He rode the rollercoaster hell ride with me and was still with me at the ending gates. I wound up moving back home, getting counseling, getting meds, and slowly working on getting back on my feet. I went through a few more jobs shakily. But I learned how to reach out when I needed too. Learned that boundaries were not a thing to be feared. That I was not alone. That there were people who cared about me. That I was not a monster. I went through a lot those few years. My sexuality changed again and again and even my gender changed in the end. (I still credit the friend I made via love of the Dragon Knights series on helping me through all that as well.) And now, here I am. 28 years old. Now identifying as transmale, pan-romantic and somewhere between asexual and demi-sexual ( as far as I know of at this moment.) I still have the occasional anxiety attack. There's still a scampering from the brain raccoons and all that the mischief they bring every now and again (from paranoia to depression and overthinking and dissociation.) But for the most part I've come to realize that I've grown a lot. I've changed a lot. I actually like most of how I am now. I'm happier. I'm more accepting of myself. I'm still hopelessly in love. And… I'm alive. You see, during that year I was on my own I tried to kill myself no less than 3 times and scarred my arms many, many times more than that. But I'm alive still. And through it all the person I thank most of all for that, the person who taught me how to breath, the person who unknowingly stole my heart, the person who showered me with art of our beloved Gil, the person who literally SAVED ME from myself - I met because I stole a couple books from a library over 10 years ago. A lifetime obsession, inspiration for art and stories and character building, a breath of life into discovering myself and who I am, a love that's still as deep now as it began, a friendship I thank the gods for every day, a true lifesaver in ever sense of the word, and even the namesake for my gender transition journey - ALL OF THIS AND MORE because I stole a couple of books from a library when I was a wee nerd.

summer films ‘18

hi there! to clarify, this is a log of films i’ve seen this summer, not exactly films set in the summer, so if you’re here for that, i’m sorry?

anyway, here we go!

1. kasal (2018) / dir. ruel s. bayani ♡ 180525 ♡ girl is engaged to the son of cebu’s current mayor who is currently preparing for elections, but her ex comes back and tries to win her back ♡ cliche, i know, but trust me, this movie deals with this plotline in a very interesting way ♡ and come on, it’s bea alonzo and paulo avelino, two icons 2. high school musical (2006) / dir. kenny ortega ♡ 180614 ♡ iconic, i love troy bolton, thanks for reminding me ♡ i know sharpay isn’t that bad but she’s still a bully lol ♡ the choreography for when there was me and you got me dying i love it ♡  fave song: stick to the status quo 3. high school musical 2 (2007) / dir. kenny ortega ♡ 180622 ♡ my least favorite in the trilogy ♡ there was so much unnecessary drama they should’ve cut troy some slack ♡ i hate chad danforth, that’s all ♡ fave song: you are the music in me 4. high school musical 3: senior year (2008) / dir. kenny ortega ♡ 180622 ♡ my favorite in the trilogy! ♡ i still hate chad tho lol but i love taylor so much she’s my favorite character! ♡ i wish they elaborated more on gabriella though, because i like to imagine an alternate ending where she declines stanford and stays in albuquerque for another year which disappoints everyone and puts a strain on her relationship with troy. that would’ve been so interesting! ♡ fave song: i love all of them, but if i had to choose, the boys are back 5. kimmy dora 2: the temple of kiyeme (2009) / dir. joyce bernal ♡ 180626 ♡ the only reason i watched this was because i had a terrible pimple on my forehead and it reminded me of some horror movie then i realized it was this so i had to look for the particular scene ♡ the movie was really bad, as expected ♡ but i absolutely love eugene domingo!! she’s so talented i really admire her as an actress

6. before sunrise (1995) / dir. richard linklater ♡ 180630 ♡ this was the day my internet ultimately stopped working (for four days, if i may add) so i thought hey why not start that movie marathon i’ve been meaning to do ♡ i was excited to watch this because it’s a known pop culture reference, and also because it’s seulgi’s favorite movie ♡ it’s unique! it’s not easy to film a story that revolves around two people who’ve just met walking around in a city neither of them knows ♡ i liked this movie but it wasn’t that spectacular or anything, i think it lacks emotion and excitement ♡ but please, do not get off a train in europe with someone you’ve just met that is dangerous 

7. before sunset (2004) / dir. richard linklater ♡ 180630 ♡  i knew nothing about this so i was actually surprised to see the same actors nine years after before sunrise’s release ♡ i like this better than the first one! céline shows the emotions i was looking for ♡ it’s much simpler and easier to follow because it really is just them walking around and talking to continue the story because of the short amount of time they have together 

8. before midnight (2013) / dir. richard linklater ♡ 180630 ♡ this movie is the reason i watched the series! it was mentioned in it’s okay, that’s love so i thought i needed to watch this, and honestly, it helped me understand the characters from iotl a bit better! ♡ it ended up being my favorite film of the three ♡ it’s more complex than the first two because it introduces more characters and is set in more locations ♡ after years of watching and reading romcoms, this made me believe in love 

9. gone girl (2014) / dir. david fincher ♡ 180701 ♡ i knew nothing about this film except that there was a girl and she was missing and the plot is unexpected? ♡ i won’t say much on this because it’s amazing when you watch it without knowing anything ♡ but it is CRAZY it hecked me up so much wow ♡ will try reading the book when i can!! 10. the grand budapest hotel (2014) / dir. wes anderson ♡ 180701 ♡ my first wes anderson film (finally) ♡ bored me at first because sadly, i can’t relate to rich european men who live in hotels and have sex with elderly women ♡ but it is so much more than that! it’s funny and deals with loyalty, the war, and crap immigrants go through ♡ yes, the cinematography is unique and beautiful, but i couldn’t appreciate it much from years of seeing wes anderson stills on my social media ♡ i went into this without knowing anything about it, but i wish i’d watched the trailer beforehand because that would’ve helped me appreciate it more 11. the fault in our stars (2014) / dir. josh boone ♡ 180702 ♡ i was bored and looking through my sister’s hard drive and i thought hey why not watch sad western teen books-turned-movies i used to glorify years ago ♡ it was alright but knowing every line, song, facial expression that would come next made it worse ♡ john green’s cameo is so awkward it’s almost funny ♡ i hope i never meet an augustus waters in my life 12. if i stay (2014) / dir. r.j. cutler ♡ 180703 ♡ part 2 of sad western teen books-turned-movies i used to glorify ♡ the story is pretty good but the film itself isn’t as good as i remembered ♡ i’m still so in love with jamie blackley after four years he’s so handsome and his voice is beautiful ♡ chloe moretz’s acting is really awkward though it’s almost painful to watch ♡ it made me want to reread the sequel where she went though! 13. she’s dating the gangster (2014) / dir. cathy garcia-molina ♡ 180705 ♡ i started this with an open mind and some expectations because although i hated on it for no reason years ago, i wanted to give it a chance ♡ but i’m sorry it really is bad ♡ kenji delos reyes is manipulative and selfish i hope i never meet a guy like him 14. grave of the fireflies (1988) / dir. isao takahata ♡ 180706 ♡ two siblings in the middle of a war ♡ watched this because a friend wanted to rabbit with me! ♡ i haven’t seen a ghibli film in a while so this was refreshing ♡ really sad though :( 15. 10 things i hate about you (1999) / dir. gil hunger ♡ 180706 ♡ guy is paid to date girl lol ♡ julia stiles is so beautiful :( i love her ♡ pretty funny actually! ♡ also watched this because friends wanted to rabbit with me :> 16. i’m drunk, i love you (2017) / dir. jp habac ♡ 180707 ♡ i finally, finally watched this ♡ not gonna lie it disappointed me? so many people loved it but for me it was eh ♡ paulo avelino’s character was pretty lacking for me, i wish they’d elaborated more on him ♡ but i liked the group dynamic because they’re not the wholesome, fake happy kind of friends, seeing them interact made me feel like they’re people i really know in real life (which made me miss my own friends) ♡ even jasmine’s character felt real because she’s probably someone i’d know HAHA ♡ fun fact: i’ve listened to the song lloydy long before watching this because i mean? a song about john lloyd? sign me up 17. that thing called tadhana (2014) / dir. antoinette jadaone ♡ 180708 ♡ another film i finally watched after multiple pop culture references ♡ i actually kinda liked it! it literally has a spiel about john lloyd of course i do but it gets better when the main characters become comfortable with each other ♡ i find it interesting that the director also directed love you to the stars and back which is another film that revolves around two people, both dealing with stuff, who’d just met and decide to go on a journey together ♡ the characters also feel pretty realistic/relatable once you get to know them 18. the spectacular now (2013) / dir. james ponsoldt ♡ 180709 ♡ part 3 of sad western teen books-turned-movies i used to glorify ♡ the only reason i rewatched this was because it was the shortest of the films i had at the time and i needed something to pass the time while loading episodes of svt club ♡ i mean it’s okay? not bad not good and i don’t even like miles teller ♡ shailene woodley perfectly plays the part of the awkward oblivious girl (and that’s not a compliment) 19. the breakup playlist (2015) / dir. dan villegas ♡ 180716 ♡ this film was so refreshing to watch?? sarah portrayed a youthful musician just starting out so so well i love her so much what a great first sarah g movie for me ♡ piolo made me fall in love with him and later on hate him, as he should ♡ i love opm kaya seeing the gig scene, some actual artists like ebe dancel, and looots of covers of songs like wag na wag mong sasabihin by kitchie nadal and with a smile by eraserheads ♡ i understand now why people love paano bang magmahal HAHAHA 20. barcelona: a love untold (2016) / dir. olivia lamasan ♡ 180717 ♡ alright so remember how i absolutely hated sdtg? ♡ I LOVED THIS FILM SO. MUCH. ♡ kathniel matured a lot in two years and i think they were perfect for this!! they really showed certain struggles of young adults and did not disappoint ♡ it also shows filipino values for family, utang ng loob, ofw struggles, etc ♡ and of course the cinematography is beautiful HUHU i mean it’s barcelona!! 21. my annoying brother (2016) / dir. kwon soo-kyung ♡ 180721 ♡ honestly took me a bit to get into it  ♡ i expected it to be funny and although it did make me laugh a lot why were there tears :((( ♡ kyungsoo is so, so, so talented i admire him so much as an actor now ♡ really hits you in the feels! a really beautiful story about two brothers 22. so i married an anti-fan (2016) / dir. kim jae-young ♡ 180724 ♡ meh ♡ it took some getting used to seeing chanyeol being all snobbish and cool instead of his usual loud happy self ♡ of course it’s overdramatic for the comedy, but the hate-turned-love isn’t even that good lol it’s just unreasonable but whatever ♡ the lead girl reminds me of arci munoz HAHA 23. wonder (2017) / dir. stephen chbosky ♡ 180725 ♡ we watched this during my summer program and i was actually pretty excited because i remember loving the book! ♡ this honestly teaches you a lot not even just from the perspective of children but also as teenagers, parents, friends, etc ♡ i thoroughly enjoyed it!

Is This...?

Pairing: SKZ’s Chan x OC [Chaeyeon] || SKZ’s Changbin x OC [Nayoung] Genre: slice of life, slight fluff Word Count: 5,081 Summary: Changbin asks his older sister for help in confessing to the girl he likes. Ofc there’s another reason on why he did so.

Warning: none... really.

oh look, Chan is in here, too. i’m sure you know who my bias is? lol and this is one with Baby Changbin!! lol happy reading and kthxbai, Admin Lia~

revised. 9.10.20

"Hey, I need your help." Changbin asked his older sister as he barged into her room without knocking.

"Can you knock first?" Chaeyeon asked instead as she looked up from her textbooks from her bed. "What if I was changing?"

"Not at this time. I know your schedule. You don't really do anything different."

"True."

"Besides, you need to go out and hang with friends or whatever. Go date and stuff."

"I'm fine with my single self. Thank you very much. Anyways, what do you want help with?"

"I like this girl and I want her to notice me."

"I thought your wannabe cool, dark, and edgy style already made you hella noticeable." Chaeyeon mused before returning back to her homework while still listening to her little brother.

"I am dark and edgy." Changbin stated with a pout that Chaeyeon didn't see. "And I'm also very cool."

"Says the boy that's way too cheerful and active with his friends."

"So what?"

"So because he can't sleep without his Munchlax named Gyu." Chaeyeon teased her brother once more with laugh following after.

Changbin grew flustered and counter-attacked. "Hey, you still sleep with all of your stuffed animals since childhood."

"And your point is?" Chaeyeon asked glancing up at Changbin.

"You're the same as me."

"True, but I'm actually cool, dark, and edgy unlike you."

"Shut up. Will you help me or not?"

"Why don't you just asked this girl straight out that you like her." Chaeyeon advised giving him an annoyed look as she just wanted to do homework.

"I can't do that." Changbin said as he sat at the end of her bed.

"Why not?"

"Because it isn't cool."

"Coo or not, it's better to just be straight with the person you like, y'know? Anyways, I don't know why you want my help when I don't go out and stuff."

"Because you give good advice some times and you're a girl."

"Don't you have friends that can help you with this?"

"Yeah, but they'll just make it worst. Besides, you're my older sister. You're supposed to help me with these things."

Chaeyeon rolled her eyes with a sigh while closing her book. "Fine, okay. So what's your plan?"

"Well, it's just gonna involve me being cool for her to notice me."

"And what cool thing are you thinking of to get her attention?"

"Why did I let you drag me all the way to Garosu-gil?" Chaeyeon groaned as she and Changbin were on the subway headed to the 'Designer Street' so that Changbin could coolly get the attention of his crush by doing something cool to which he still hadn't revealed to her yet.

"Because you have no life and nothing else better to do. Remember?" Changbin answered as his sister elbowed him. "Ow, well it's true."

"I don't care. I still had homework that's due later tomorrow and to  just chill and relax."

"You're smart. You'll probably finish it before class begins anyways."

"That's true."

"Also, you basically chill and relax all day, every day, anyways."

"Yeah, yeah. Enough about me and now about you. How is going to Garosu gonna help with anything? You stalking her or what?"

"What? No. No. There's no stalking involved." Changbin denied with an awkward laugh before speaking again. "The boys just mentioned they'll be here hanging out when we were playing basketball after classes and we decided to hang out there later."

"I thought you were trying to get this girl's attention. You didn't mentioned the others."

"I am. I'm gonna do both. She just happens to work at one of the boutiques in Garosu-gil."

"Uh huh. So what's her name?"

"Nayoung."

"Does she go to the same school as you?"

"We did, but I graduated. She's a year under me."

"Wait a minute. You've known of her for two years and you haven't said anything to her? That's not a crush, Changbin. That's love."

Changbin shot his sister a weird look. "Love? You're crazy, Chaeyeon. That's not love. We're too young for that."

"Yeah, I'm the crazy one who hasn't taken a few classes in psychology this year. Sure, whatever." Chaeyeon muttered to herself as she leaned against her seat and crossed her arms in boredom while looking out the window. "How much longer until we get there?"

"It should be coming up soon."

"Good, because you're buying me food."

~~~~~~~~

"How many slices of cheesecake are you going to buy?" Changbin whispered in a slightly panicked tone as he watched his sister ordered another slice to her already slices of eight and counting while they stood inside C27.

"Um, that depends." Chaeyeon said with a smirk in his direction. "How much do you got on you?"

"Not enough for your sweet-tooth. Why?"

Chaeyeon's smirked grew and Changbin began to whined. "Oh c'mon, Yeon. Don't do this to me. You're supposed to take care of me."

"I'm just kidding, Bin." Chaeyeon chuckled while patting her brother's back in comfort as she pulled out her own wallet from her bag. "Sheeh. Calm down. Anyways, save the money for your date with Miss. Nayoung when you finally confess."

"Ah, don't mess with me like that."

Chaeyeon just laughed as she paid for her slices of different cheesecake while afterwards the siblings went to one of the tables inside to wait for the desserts.

"Alright, Bin. I've ordered my food and so what's your cool idea for this Nayoung girl?"

"She works over there." Changbin motioned with his chin as Chaeyeon looked out the window at the boutique opposite them. "And what are you still doing here?"

"Because you wanted cheesecake."

"No. I just wanted to mess with you for dragging me all the way here. Plus, Jisung messaged me during the subway ride that he wanted some cheesecake."

"When doesn't he want cheesecake?" Changbin scoffed. "You treat him more like a little brother than you do me."

"That's what you think. He's just as annoying as you along with the others."

"You know you love our company in your lonely loner world."

"I choose to be alone, Changbin. There's a difference between being alone and feeling lonely."

"Aren't they basically the same?"

"No. Being alone is the state of being while feeling lonely is the state of the mind. Get it?"

"Not really."

"You'll understand when you experience the difference."

"Do I want to?"

"I hope that you don't, but it makes you aware of the things about yourself though."

Just then Chaeyeon's order arrived ready to go and she thanked the staff before she and Changbin got up and left the shop.

"Alright, Changbin. Stop bring up my oh so lonesome single life that you think you need to spice up. You go do you and here you go." Chaeyeon said as she handed her brother a smaller box similar to her bigger one.

"What's that?" Changbin asked eyeing the white container suspiciously.

"It's cheesecake, dummy. That's what you're going to give to your crush."

"I said I was going to do something cool."

"Knowing you, your ass is gonna embarrassed yourself in front of her and you'll never confessed to her after that."

"That's harsh."

"It's true, now go and give her this cake and asked her out on a date."

"But, I-"

"Go or I'm going to do it for you so I can get this done and over with."

Changbin let out a grumble although he took the small package before psyching himself.

"You got this, Changbin. You can do it. You're cool, dark, and edgy. There's no way she can turn you down without giving you a chance. You got this."

Chaeyeon took a seat at the table that was outside of C27 and watched her brother amusingly before taking out one of slices in her own larger container.

"Okay, I'm going." Changbin announced as Chaeyeon gave him a thumbs up. "Good luck."

Changbin nodded earnestly as Chaeyeon watched him finally make his way over to 3RD EYE. Just as Changbin had entered the boutique she was soon disturbed by a very particular and familiar voice.

"Yeon! My love!" Jisung announced happily and playfully as he glomped Chaeyeon into a hug. "I've missed you so much. I haven't seen you all day."

Chaeyeon tried to moved away from the younger male's embrace, but Jisung held onto her tighter with a pout.

"Why do you hate me, Yeon? Don't you love me?"

"Because you're annoying as fuck."

"Okay, rude."

Jisung made a face as he finally let her go and sat in one of the chair and went through the container.

"Did you get me the chocolate one?"

"Why don't you look."

"It's here! Thanks."

"You're not welcome."

"You know you love me."

"Right."

"Hi, guys." She warmly greeted the others.

"Hi, Yeon." Hyunjin, Felix, Seungmin, and Jeongin greeted her as she opened her arms for hugs knowing that they were going to give her one regardless if she wanted one or not before they sat down.

"Why do you accept their hugs all willingly, yet always reject me?" Jisung asked with a pout. "You're so mean to me."

"Because you're a brat and hug me all the time, anyways." Chaeyeon answered with a smirk and a roll of her eyes before looking at the others. "So did you guys come to support Changbin in his love confession, too?"

"I thought he said that he wanted to buy a new jacket." Seungmin stated with a puzzled look. "That's what he messaged in the group chat earlier."

"Oh that was me." Jeongin clarified. "Changbin owes me a new jacket."

"Why does he owe you a new jacket?" Jisung asked with a raised eyebrow while eating one of the cheesecake slices.

"Oh, was it because he accidentally spilled soda all over you the other day when we were watching horror movies?" Felix asked as Jeongin nodded. "Yup. It was one of my favorites."

"So basically my brother made up excuses to get y'all over here when he didn't even need me." Chaeyeon let out annoyed while glancing at the boys.

"Oh, cheer up, my love." Jisung stated while pinching her cheek as Chaeyeon swatted his hand away.

Jisung let out a chuckle before speaking again. "You're basically here if something goes wrong."

She side-eyed him. "What could go wrong?"

"Dunno."

"But like Jisung said, Yeon. You're here if anything does." Felix confirmed again with a laugh as Chaeyeon groaned. "Fuck my life, man."

"I'm pretty sure it's because of Minho." Hyunjin spoke a second later after going through the cheesecake slices to find the one he wanted to eat. "Minho mentioned that Nayoung would be working today and that she'll be working late, too."

"Oh, so he wanted to take her home and make his move like that?" Chaeyeon pieced together as Hyunjin shrugged. "Probably."

"Anyways, where is Minho?" Chaeyeon asked realizing he was missing from the group. "He was supposed to return my camera to me."

"Right here, my darling, Yeonnie." Minho announced as he placed Chaeyeon's camera onto the table and back-hugged her from behind. "I knew you always thought of me whenever I was never around despite you saying otherwise."

"Ew." Chaeyeon cringed as Jisung smacked Minho to let go of Chaeyeon. "Hey, hey. She was mine first."

"Well she's mine now." Minho smirked as he hugged Chaeyeon tighter while she rolled her eyes. "I'm nobody's and now let me go or no cake for you."

"Fine." He reluctantly said as he hugged her once more before letting her go.

Chaeyeon shook her head and wondered how she got dragged into being friends with her brother's friends then remembered something.

"Isn't there another addition to your group of friends that I was supposed to finally meet already?"

"Oh yeah, Chan." Minho said as he pulled a chair from another table to the table with his friends as he scooted himself in-between Seungmin and Chaeyeon. "He was going to join us, but he had other plans last minute."

"Oh, I see. It's weird that he's been friends with you guys for a few years now, but he's the only one that I haven't met yet." Chaeyeon voiced out with a pensive look.

"It's because he's busy with school, work, and home life compare to the rest of us." Felix answered. "The both of you always seem to have plans whenever we all try to hang out and what not."

Chaeyeon narrowed her eyes at him before sweeping it over the others. "It's because you guys have plans that always involved me without my permission."

"You have a very dull life anyways, Yeon." Jeongin stated with a goofy smile as Chaeyeon looked over at him with a frown. "You're supposed to be on my side, Jeongin."

"True, but I'm closer with Changbin than you."

"Obviously." Chaeyeon muttered the last part as she released a deep breath while picking up her camera. "No alone time for me again today."

"What was that?" Jisung asked upon hearing something as Chaeyeon shook her head. "Nothing."

 "So Changbin's doing it for real this time?" Minho asked upon realizing his friend wasn't around a few minutes later.

"That's what Yeon said." Seungmin answered. "I thought we were here for clothes."

"He might go clothes shopping since it looked like it didn't work since he came out looking sad." Felix added a second later.

"Wait, what?" Chaeyeon looked up from going through her camera towards Seungmin. "Bin already came out?"

"Yeah. Like a few seconds ago." Felix confirmed. "He threw the white box he was holding on to the ground, too."

Chaeyeon followed Felix's hand and saw the small container she had given her brother before he went inside 3RD EYE.

"Oh, he did not. That was the feature flavor this month.

"Changbin wasted good cheesecake?!" Jisung gasped. "How cruel."

"Just eat your cake, Jisung." Chaeyeon told him before looking at the others. "Where did Bin go?"

"That way." Seungmin said as he pointed in the direction that Changbin had ran off to.

Chaeyeon set her camera on the table and got up to go look for him.

"I can't believe she'll leave her cake here for us to eat." Hyunjin commented while still eating the one he grabbed earlier as Jisung agreed with a grin. "And that is why her food always gets stolen fair and square."

"True." Minho agreed as he lifted one of the slices out of the container. "But then again she always blames you."

"I know and it's usually always you."

"I know."

"Rude."

"Shouldn't we have mentioned that Nayoung already ran after Changbin?" Jeongin asked a second later while looking at the the others.

"Nah." The older four replied.

Felix tilted his head in thought. "I think we should though. Don't you guys think so?"

"Nope. We're not gonna join in that mess." Hyunjin commented before bringing out the rest of the cheesecake pieces. "Let's just eat and wait for the aftermath."

"Oh, is this also part of the other plan to get Yeon a date with Chan?" Seungmin asked a second later remembering the talks from weeks ago.

"Yeah." The others answered with mischievous looks.

~~~~~~~~

Chaeyeon quickly walked around with her head swinging left and right to try and spot her brother among the others, but couldn't see him.

"OMG, he's not that hard to spot, but when I'm actually looking for his dumbass I can't find him at all. Dafaq is this shit." Chaeyeon grumbled to herself as she moved about quickly with worried steps.

"When I find you, Seo Changbin, I'ma beat your ass first for wasting my time. Then beat it a second time for wasting a perfectly good slice of cheesecake." Chaeyeon muttered the threat against her brother. "And then I'll ask you what happened afterwards."

Just when Chaeyeon was about to give up she suddenly spotted Changbin a few meters away just chilling alone by a ginkgo tree. She let out a relieved breath upon seeing he was still okay and not hurting himself or doing something stupid.

"Bin! Binnie! Changbin!" Chaeyeon called out as she saw him lift his head to see who had called by his various names.

Before she could wave to get his attention she was suddenly pulled to the side and away from his direct line of sight.

Changbin looked around and saw someone else instead as he thought it was his sister's voice that he had heard calling his name.

"N-Nayoung?" Changbin stuttered before internally scolding himself for stuttering.

"Hi, Changbin." Nayoung shyly smiled at him. "I'm sorry if something happened at 3RD EYE to make you run off like that."

"What? Run off? Nothing happened to make me do something like that." Changbin casually said while dismissing the topic and went to coolly lean a hand against the ginkgo tree, but missed and later caught himself to right himself.

Nayoung giggled and Changbin once again internally scolded himself for making a fool of himself. He agreed with his sister. He is embarrassing himself, but he tried to save face by directing the topic elsewhere.

"Aren't you still supposed to be working?"

"Yeah, well I got off early thanks to Ayeon and Nakjoon who understood my situation at hand."

"What situation?"

"Well, not really a situation that's like bad or anything. It's just that I don't know if you know, but Chan and I are j-"

Changbin interrupted her already knowing what she was going to say.

"Yeah, I know. The both of you are dating."

Nayoung shook her head with a laugh as Changbin eyed her.

"Why are you laughing?"

"Because you actually think I'm dating my neighbor who I practically grew up with and see him like an annoying older brother." Nayoung stated as she let out another chuckle. "That's why I'm laughing, Changbin."

"Wait. Chan isn't your boyfriend?" Changbin asked while removing the hand that held him against the tree before falling back against it harshly.

Changbin pushed himself up right as Nayoung nodded.

"So, you don't like Chan?" Changbin asked next with Nayoung nodding again.

"Do you perhaps like someone else?"

"Mmhmm." Nayoung hummed with an amused smile.

"Who?" Changbin asked clueless as Nayoung laughed at his cuteness before answering. "You."

"I knew you like Hyunjin since the first time he offered that piece of sushi to you two years ago during the opening ceremony." Changbin stated without realizing what Nayoung had said. "I knew it."

Nayoung raised an amused eyebrow at his reaction before Changbin recalled what she had actually said.

"Wait a minute. Me? You actually like me? Did you actually say that?"

"Yeah. I've liked you since the day I saw you performing at the talent show with Felix and Minho. I didn't know you could sing and rap like that."

"But you didn't even say anything to me that day. You just praised Felix and Minho!"

"Uh, I didn't even know you that well to praised you in a special manner. I still congratulated you guys for doing a good job even though you guys didn't win."

"You didn't even hug me."

"Because I didn't know you that well and it wasn't like you opened your arms for a hug anyways."

"I was shy and nervous."

"Oh. I thought it was because you were keeping up with your whole cool, dark, and edgy facade." Nayoung said with a smirk.

"You knew?"

"Yeah."

Changbin smiled before realizing what Nayoung had said.

"Wait a minute. It's not a facade."

"I mean to each their own, but you're still cool either way." Nayoung said with a smile.

"I wish you would tell that to my sister. She thinks I'm uncool."

"Well, the way you speak about her some times does make her a lot more cooler than you."

"That doesn't help me right now."

Nayoung laughed before suppressing the laughter upon seeing Changbin's pout.

"Sorry, sorry. It's just that I think that's normal between siblings and those that have grown up closely with one another because Chan calls me cute when I do normal things and pats my head like I'm some sort of pet a majority of the time. He's a mess."

"You're right though. Chan is a mess."

"That's why he needs to get out and meet someone like your sister."

"I don't know, Nayoung. This was like killing two birds with one stone. Plus, Yeon isn't really a people person until she becomes comfortabe with it in the end because she doesn't really have a choice and just goes with the flow."

"Yeah, Changbin. She's definitely sounds way cooler than you and I haven't even met her yet."

"I don't even know how to respond to that, but speaking of Chaeyeon I totally forgot about her. I basically ditched her with the others." Changbin admitted before realizing about what he had done earlier with widened eyes. "Oh shit. I hope she didn't see me throw away the slice of cheesecake she wanted me to give to you to ask you out."

"Oh? You were gonna asked me out?" Nayoung asked making sure she heard right even though she already knew. "And with cheesecake?"

"Uh, yeah, well, yes." Changbin finally said with a sheepish look. "I was gonna do it in a cool way, but I saw you and Chan hugging and got upset."

"Like I said earlier, Chan and I are just neighbors. Also he was hugging me for kinda setting him up with someone cool like your sister."

"Wait. I wanted to ask you out on top of trying to set my sister up with Chan, but yet you knew that, too. How?"

"Minho told me."

"Ugh. That guy was playing matchmaker behind my back."

"I'm glad because now we both know how we feel about one another. Also Chan can finally leave me alone."

"Yeah, well I wondered what my sister will do to me and the others when she finds out the truth."

"Well, we have some time until then. For now that, I have nothing planned after this and Chan seemed to have disappeared so do you wanna hang out?"

"Like in as a date kind of hang out?"

"Yeah if you're down?"

"Oh, hell yeah. I mean, yeah sure. What do you wanna do?"

"I'm starving so do you wanna go to Serosu-gil and eat around there?"

"Yes that's perfect! Let's go!" Changbin exclaimed happily while offering his hand for Nayoung to take to which she did.

"Gotcha, but I'll have to be home before eleven though or Chan will beat your ass." She told him.

"Why would he beat my ass? We're like best friends."

"He still sees me as his litter sister despite you being his friend, so I rank higher than you."

Changbin let out a heavy sigh. "I wonder if this will change anything between us."

"Let's just go get something to eat and deal with that later." Nayoung suggested before pulling his hand to urge him on.

"So is this an official date then?" Changbin asked to clarify once they started moving as Nayoung nodded with a chuckle. "Yes, Changbin. It's a date. Now let's go. I wanna get there before it gets crowded."

Nayoung pulled him again towards the area of Serosu-gil with Changbin smiling happily at the outcome of today.

~~~~~~~~

Chaeyeon looked to her left to see who had pulled her over and saw a guy around her age with his hand on her forearm. Unaware that this was the Chan that she was supposed to meet, the neighbor of Nayoung, and set up on a date unaware of that fact. Shaking his hold off of her Chaeyeon backed away from the male and gave him a once over with a weird look.

"Um, can I help you with something?"

"Yeah, you can." Chan smiled at her. "Can you not go and bother those two over there."

Chan pointed in the direction of Nayoung and Changbin while Chaeyeon cast him another weird look.

"Bother who? I'm just looking for my brother so I don't know why you pulled along with you."

"Yeah sorry about that, but you're looking for your brother?"

"Yeah. I spotted him, but then you pulled me away. He's probably beating himself up for not confessing to his crush."

"Oh!" Chan exclaimed brightly with an even brighter smile. "Are you Seo Chaeyeon?"

"Depends on who's asking." Chaeyeon replied although she continued to give Chan weird looks. "Who are you?"

"I'm Bang Chan."

"Banchan? Your parents really named you side dishes?" Chaeyeon asked with a suppressed chuckled.

"No. It's Bang and Chan. Bang Chan." He enunciated as Chaeyeon gave him an OK sign. "Ah, I see. Okay, gotcha, but yeah I'm Seo Chaeyeon."

Then something clicked in her head.

"Oh, you're a friend of Changbin's aren't you? The oh so famous Chan that I haven't gotten to meet yet, right?"

"The one and only." Chan beamed happily as Chaeyeon was wary of his happy demeanor. "Um, yeah, right."

The two stood there in silence before Chaeyeon realized she was supposed to search for her brother.

"Did you know that he was gonna ask about the Nayoung girl?" She asked Chan.

"Yes." He answered. "Nayoung's my neighbor and because these two need to work out their situation and finally confess to one another that they like each other."

"Oh, I see." Chaeyeon sighed in tiredness. "I seriously was not needed for this."

She then looked over at Chan who still had a polite smile on his face. "Anyways, it was nice meeting you, Bang Chan. Also seeing that you don't need to help those two any longer the other seven are hanging outside C27 and probably ate all of my cheesecakes by now. You can join them."

"You're already leaving?" Chan's smiled dimmed once he spoke those words.

"Uh, yeah, but it's okay. You got the other boys to keep you company." Chaeyeon smiled at him. "I still have homework to do and knowing Changbin and if this went well, he probably went on his date with Nayoung so the he won't bother with the others."

"This wasn't how it was supposed to turned out like."

"What wasn't?"

"Oh, um, just that I was wondering if you wanted to do something with me instead."

"What do you mean by do something with you? Don't you have the boys to go and hang out with?"

"Well, true, but I'm not doing anything and you're not doing anything so-"

Chaeyeon interrupted him with an amused smile. "I don't know if you heard me say it earlier, but I was gonna go back home and do homework."

"Oh, I did." Chan caught her smile and returned one of his own. "You were gonna go back, but you're not doing anything at this very moment."

"Ah, I see. Is this another one of Changbin's set up to get me to meet you and so we can date, too?"

"No, not his idea, but Nayoung's been trying to tell me to go on dates so that I can stop bothering her and she said you sounded very cool."

"Oh did she?" Chaeyeon chuckled. "The girl's never met me yet she thinks I'm cool?"

"Highly so."

"Is this your usual way of asking girls out on dates then?"

"No, but is it working?"

Chaeyeon laughed. "Sort of, but since we've just met and I'm not sure if you're gonna turn out like the others, I guess we can do something."

"What do you mean by turn out like the others?"

"It's nothing, but I have a feeling that I will regret this later or something."

"Let's see if your feelings will turn out like what you're thinking then."

Before Chaeyeon could confirm anything with Chan she received a notification and checked her phone. She rolled her eyes upon reading the words that her brother had just sent her.

"Anything important?" Chan asked upon seeing her eye-rolls.

"Changbin said he's on a date and that I should be hanging out with his friend name, Bang Chan."

"Ohh, that sounds like a nice suggestion. What are you gonna do?"

"Well," Chaeyeon stalled while putting her phone away with her mind already made up, "I would rather go home, but since you don't seem that annoying or weird as the others at this very moment I guess you and I can go do something."

"Great! Because Changbin's told me that you wanted to check out this arcade and I so happened to wanna check it out, too."

Chaeyeon gave him a narrowed look. "Are you a stalker?"

"No." Chan laughed as he waved a hand in front of him to dismissed the notion. "I'm not a stalker."

"Are you sure? Should I even be asking that? I think I need to leave area."

Chaeyeon mused while backing up as Chan reached out a hand to stop her, but didn't do so once he realized what he was about to do. Chaeyeon stopped and shot him an amused look.

"Um, sorry, but I didn't want you to go." Chan admitted with an embarrassed laugh. "Anyways, Changbin likes talking about you and I feel like we'll get along well."

Chaeyeon's jaw dropped as she made a face. "That brat talks about me to you guys?"

"Usually they're good things."

"And the other times?"

"Um, that you'll have to ask him about yourself." Chan chuckled sheepishly before pointing towards the subway station. "So to District 9 then?"

"Sure, but don't cry if you lose to me in the games."

"What? Bold of you to assume that I'll cry over arcade games."

"Yes, yes it is, but I have a feeling that I'll actually have a worthy opponent to go up against finally."

"Again, bold of you to assume that I'm actually good at arcade games."

"You know what, Bang Chan, loser pays for dinner then."

"Oh, we're getting dinner after this? Is this a date, Seo Chaeyeon?"

"Bold of you to assume that it's a date, Bang Chan." Chaeyeon said with a proud look before Chan countered her words with a smirk. "Then is it too bold of me to assume that I'll get your number afterwards?"

"Whatever. Hurry up before I leave you behind and go by myself and then you don't get anything and I return back to my life with a bunch of idiots bothering me."

Chaeyeon said before rushing off with Chan tagging alongside her while smiling all giddily at her sudden flustered reaction.

Gridania Story-Go-Round Storylog:  April 2017

An Egg-citing Egg-periment

[19:09]Syranelle Ironleaf: "Our story begins in the laboratory of a brilliant lalafellian arcanist who was determined to change his carbuncle into a cuter animal. He was always fond of bunnies, having spent way too much time at the Golden Saucer in his youth, so that's what he aimed for. It took him many moons, but he finally managed it. A Bunnybuncle, at last!" >> [19:11]Syranelle Ironleaf: "There was something wrong with the Bunnybuncle, though. It often -- well, honestly, frighteningly often -- laid random eggs. So often, in fact, that the Arcanist's laboratory was festooned with them. Eggs in his books, eggs on his desk, eggs on his favorite chair, even eggs in his bed and on his pillow. They were everywhere! 'What am I supposed to do with all these eggs?!' he lamented. 'I need help!' so he placed an advertisement with the Adventurer's Guild that read..."

[19:14]Aislinn Melpomene: "Looking for fellow arcanist researchers to discover the mysteries of carbuncles... and bunnies. Your reward for assisting in this mystery: one thousand gil. Ten thousand if you can solve the mystery! And on a completely unrelated note, looking for kind and happy homes for bunnies." The arcanist waited and waited. >> [19:17]Aislinn Melpomene: Soon enough, he received several offers. Up and coming arcanists, ones who had served their time on the battlefields, honing their geometric magicks, and all sorts in between. The first came. The bunny-buncle was so happy to see a new face, that it produced even -more- eggs, even one in the newcomer's hair! [19:19]Syranelle Ironleaf: "The new Arcanist, a budding young miqo'te, was astonished even astounded at the development with the lalafell's Bunnybuncle. She inspected it carefully, both physically and through aether. 'This is incredible!' she said, 'How is this accomplished?' She seemed heedless of the egg atop her head, even though it rocked back and forth precariously, threatening to fall off at any moment. The Bunnybuncle bore this all in silence, content to be basked with such attention. >> [19:21]Syranelle Ironleaf: However, the pile of eggs was growing worse and worse by the moment. The Lalafell Arcanist finally had to call a halt to their research. "I'm going to have a house that's one giant omelet at this rate!" he cried. "This cannot go on... w-wait... Omelets! I'll go see the Head Chef at the Bismarck, maybe they could use all these eggs!" Indeed, he marched himself across the city to the renown restaurant where all the Culinarians trained. [19:25]Aislinn Melpomene: The guildmaster and his students were quite happy to have a steady source of eggs, not to mention quite free of charge! The Lalafellan Arcanist brought him many - as many as his bag could carry. He cracked an egg open, one could never know when it came to magic. Lo and behold... a tiny carbunny popped out! >> [19:25]Aislinn Melpomene: He was astonished. He could not cook this! The tiny carbunny hobbled over to him and with a little mewl, settled into the guildmaster's arms. Soon enough, the other culinarian students were clamoring for their own, and the Arcanist was happy to oblige. He returned to his laboratory to figure out what to do next. He studied and studied... until he heard of a report from the Culinarian's guild. Their guild was overrun by Carbunny eggs! [19:34]Syranelle Ironleaf: The Guildmaster begged for the Arcanist to take them back. They were getting into everything, it was impossible to cook, business would be ruined! But the Arcanist refused. "I need space in my lab; I don't have room for them either!" In the meantime, the miqo'te Arcanist who answered his earlier ad was still fiddling with the original Bunnybuncle. She managed to figure out that if you fed it enough aether it eventually *popped* in a shower of glitter, like an over-inflated balloon. >> [19:36]Syranelle Ironleaf: With a solution thus, accidentally, found she ran to tell the Lalafell. "I've found a way to cull the Bunnybuncles! All you need to do is overload them with aether and they'll pop like bubbles of energy." The Lalafell grimaced. "That sounds kind of questionable, are you sure it's safe?" The miqo'te shrugged. "They're just aetheric constructs; it's not like they're real. Besides, what choice do we have? At the rate they're multiplying, they'll take over Limsa Lominsa in a week!" [19:40]Aislinn Melpomene: With a reluctant agreement, the Lalafell agreed to the course of action. So, around they went, 'popping' the Bunnybuncles. Within minutes, the guild was covered in glitter, and the two mages, exhausted. Believing their task over, they returned to his lab. >> [19:43]Aislinn Melpomene: To their dismay, they found the original set of Bunnybuncle eggs had begun to hatch. And as they did, they hatched in a multitude of sizes. Large Bunnybuncles, almost as big as his chair! Tiny bunnybuncles, the size of the miqo'te's ring finger. And they were all... laying... eggs, the sizes of which were in proportion to their own sizes. The miqo'te looked to the lalafell. "I believe we are going to need more help..." [19:46]Syranelle Ironleaf: Bunnybuncles galore! With eggs in myriad sizes spawning every second. "Good Gods, I don't think we have enough Arcanists to get rid of them all! What are we going to do?" the lalafell sobbed, burying his face in his hands. The miqo'te thought for a long moment, but an idea struck her like lightning! [19:48]Syranelle Ironleaf: "The Hatching-tide Festival!" she crowed, grabbing her little lalafell companion and giving him a good shake. "Every year the Dreamers' come 'round and have people hunt up eggs. Well, I'm sure they'd love a never-ending supply of eggs!" With that, she scurried off in order to find out how to contact the organizers of the Hatching-tide Festival. This was sure to alleviate their problems... right? [19:52]Aislinn Melpomene: As it turned out, the Dreamers were quite happy to have so many eggs. And bunnies. After all, they mused, who did not like bunnies? And so, games were crafted for adventurers. Collect an egg here, collect an egg there, and bring them back. It was simple enough... And if an adventurer stole off with an egg, well, that is what the extras were for. And so, the eggs were set out around Gridania, placed in both easy and hard to find places. It started off well enough. >> [19:55]Aislinn Melpomene: The first adventurer returned with an egg. "I have found one!" She announced cheerfully. What they did not know, was that the teenaged hyur was a thaumaturge, and one whose aether acted up with her excitement. Giddy at having found the first egg of the season, her aether reacted - and struck the Bunnybuncle's egg with a faint zap of lightning, though not enough to destroy it. It however hatched in her arms. Immediately, the Dreamers knew that something was very wrong with this Bunnybuncle. [19:58]Syranelle Ironleaf: It had /fangs/, this Bunnybuncle, and seemed quite angry. It tried to bite the Dreamer as they pondered over it and so flustered by it were they that they sent again for the lalafell and miqo'te who started all this. "Look at this creature!" they said, pointing to the Vorpal Bunnybuncle. "It's downright hostile! You have to deal with it at once!" Try as they might, though, the pair of Arcanists couldn't draw close enough to 'pop' the Vorpal Bunnybuncle like they had its predecessors. >> [20:01]Syranelle Ironleaf: "What are we going to do? It's got nasty, big, pointy teeth! Perhaps we should run away!" the lalafell said, wringing his hands in dismay. "We can't just leave it here, what if it hurts someone?" the miqo'te argued. "Well, it might hurt /us!/" the lalafell protested. The miqo'te sighed. "I think we need to call in even /more/ help." So she went to the Adventurer's Guild and placed another ad. [20:05]Aislinn Melpomene: And this time, a tall male Roegadyn answered. "Oi, chief." He greeted the two. "Ye've got a bunny problem?" "Yes!" The Lalafell whined. "We cannot get close to one who has become quite hostile! And we cannot get rid of it if we cannot get close!" The Roe let out a boisterous laugh, shifting the axe on his back. "Yer just scared of a little bunny? Fine, show me where it is, and I'll deal with it!" >> [20:08]Aislinn Melpomene: They departed to the last known location of the angry Bunnybuncle. It was still in the area, having made a nest in the Dreamer's bucket of eggs. "Oh, what will we do!" The Dreamer bemoaned. "We must be able to get to that basket! It has been foretold in my visions!" The Roe let out another laugh and strolled nonchalantly towards the basket. "Ehhh, ain't ye' a little cute bugger? Ye' ain't that scary!" He reached out to grab the bunnybuncle by the scruff of its neck. [20:11]Syranelle Ironleaf: As soon as the roegadyn's hand neared, the Vorpal Bunnybuncle lashed out with it's sharp teeth and narrowly missed biting the roegadyn. "Whoa there!" the great roe cried in alarm, "That's not your ordinary bunny!" The miqo'te grimaced, placing her hands on her hips. "I /told/ you that to begin with!" The roegadyn crouched on his haunches, surveying the Vorpal Bunnybuncle from a safe distance. "I will send for my friend, the Brave Sir Robin, he's a great paladin from Ul'dah." >> [20:12]Syranelle Ironleaf: "I'm sure if anyone can manage to defeat this beast, it will be Brave Sir Robin!" The roegadyn assured them. The lalafell and the miqo'te heaved a sigh of relief and waited for this brave paladin to arrive. In the meantime, they built a crude sort of pen around the Bunnybuncle to keep it from going anywhere. [20:16]Aislinn Melpomene: The Brave Sir Robin, a midlander dressed in the shimmering white armor of the Sultansworn, strode forward with grace and confidence. "Where is this beast?" He asked haughtily. "I will elminate it, so no other need fear." He walked to the pen. "*This* is the beast?" He looked to the others. "Do not underestimate it! It is a strong and viscious being!" The Lalafell warned, and the Roe agreed. >> [20:18]Aislinn Melpomene: "Psh." The paladin scoffed, then reached to open the pen. The Vorpal Bunnybuncle looked up, then launched itself at the Paladin! With a shriek resembling that of a girl, he SWUNG at the bunny with his shield with all his might! The vorpal bunny poofed into a could of glitter... and a blue gemstone laid where the bunny had just been. [20:22]Syranelle Ironleaf: "Well, that was certainly short-lived," the lalafell Arcanist observed, "But what's that it left behind?" He stared at the blue gemstone curiously. It was lying atop the bucket of Bunnybuncle eggs that the Vorpal Bunnybuncle had made its nest. However, Sir Robin might be brave, he was also clumsy. He accidentally cracked one of the eggs as he took up the gemstone, but instead of producing a Bunnybuncle like all the others did, it just leaked out yolk and egg white, like a normal egg. >> [20:24]Syranelle Ironleaf: "Did it just turn all of those Bunnybuncle Eggs into normal eggs?" The Arcanists said, almost in unison. They scurried forward to take the blue gemstone from Sir Robin, inspecting it carefully. "If we can convert all the Bunnybuncle eggs into normal ones, maybe we can finally put an end to their ceaseless spawning!" It was worth a try, at least, so they carried the gemstone to another nearby pile of eggs. [20:27]Aislinn Melpomene: So the four carefully placed the gemstone on top of the next pile of eggs and waited a few moments. Afterwards, the Roe pulled out his axe, then slammed it down - crushing the eggs, and leaving a very eggy mess behind. However, in the process, the gemstone was also split - breaking into two halves. "Well... that did not last long." The miqo'te muttered. The Lalafell shrieked. "It could have been perfect!" He bemoaned. >> [20:29]Aislinn Melpomene: Sir Robin picked up one of the halves. "Well... why do we not simply see if these will work still?" He suggested, and the miqo'te picked up the other. "I suppose so... Let us split up." She ordered. The Lalafell went with Brave Sir Robin; the miqo'te with the Roegadyn. The first two came across another nest of Bunnybuncles, the mother of which perked up as they approached - appearing to be drawn to the half-gemstone, sniffing at it curiously. [20:32]Syranelle Ironleaf: Unsure of what to do with a fully fledged Bunnybuncle, instead of an egg, the Lalafell rubbed the half-gemstone atop the Bunnybuncle's head. But nothing seemed to happen. "Maybe your gemstone does not work upon the hatched ones. Mayhap try something more egg-like!" Sir Robin said, pointing to another nearby pile of Bunnybuncle eggs. The lalafell touched his gemstone to the eggs, then nodded for Sir Robin to break one. Sure enough, the egg was just a normal egg again! >> [20:34]Syranelle Ironleaf: "Whew, thank goodness!" he said in relief. Unbeknownst to them, the Bunnybuncle they'd touched with the gem began to shrink. And shrink. And shrink. Until it was nothing more than a mote of aether energy that got swept away by the Lifestream. On the other side of town, the miqo'te and the roegadyn were approaching another group of eggs with a pile of Bunnybuncles sleeping atop them. [20:40]Aislinn Melpomene: This pair had a similar idea. They placed the half a gem on a bunnybuncle's head. It perked up at the feeling, sending the gemstone flying into the air. The miqo'te caught it - but squeezed too hard in her desperation not to lose it. Part of the gemstone crumbled to dust, the dust settling onto the Bunnybuncles. Slowly, they began to shrink and shrink, until they were naught but specks of aether, blown off with the wind. >> [20:41]Aislinn Melpomene: The miqo'te glanced between the gemstone and where the bunnybuncles had just been. "The dust! Even the dust will rid us of them!" She quickly headed off to find the next nest. [20:45]Agnos Le'maudit: Off she ran, almost like a chicken with its head cut off. "The gemstone makes the Bunnybuncles go away!" she shouted as she ran, her Roegadyn compatriot sprinting after her to keep up. Her messaged managed to garner many an odd look from passer-bys, but more importantly, it reached Sir Robin and the lalafellin Arcanist as they crossed paths. [20:45]Agnos Le'maudit: Off she ran, almost like a chicken with its head cut off. "The gemstone makes the Bunnybuncles go away!" she shouted as she ran, her Roegadyn compatriot sprinting after her to keep up. Her messaged managed to garner many an odd look from passer-bys, but more importantly, it reached Sir Robin and the lalafellin Arcanist as they crossed paths. [20:48]Agnos Le'maudit: Sir Robin and the Arcanist exchanged glances, and there was an audible click as they realized what they should do. Off they ran to their next batch, touching the gemstone to any and all carbunnies and eggs they could find. But just then, a little girl approached them, curious to know why they were making all the little carbunnies disappear and turning the glittery eggs into normal ones. [20:51]Syranelle Ironleaf: Such matters are always difficult to explain to children, but the four of them tried their best. "You see," the lalafell began, "these Bunnybuncles aren't real creatures; they were an experiment of sorts that got out of hand." The miqo'te continued, "If they keep multiplying, soon everything will be taken over by Bunnybuncles and there won't be room for the rest of us." The roegadyn took up the speech next. >> [20:53]Syranelle Ironleaf: "And if some of them get exposed to magic they shouldn't, they might become dangerous." Brave Sir Robin finished off their explanation. "And then you'll have to run away and call Brave Sir Robin to save you! And we don't want that. We want everyone to be safe and the Bunnybuncles to go back to theory where they belong! This should be a warning to all young Arcanists not to meddle in things they shouldn't!" He might have glared a bit at the lalafell as he said this. [20:57]Agnos Le'maudit: "But I like the bunnybuncles," the little girl pouted. "And I like the glittery eggs. Can't it wait until after the festival?" In unison, the four adults muttered, "Not really..." "And why not?" the girl asked. "Time is of the essence, my dear," the lalafell said softly to her. "These bunnybuncles make little ones faster than you can imagine." [20:57]Agnos Le'maudit: "But I like the bunnybuncles," the little girl pouted. "And I like the glittery eggs. Can't it wait until after the festival?" In unison, the four adults muttered, "Not really..." "And why not?" the girl asked. "Time is of the essence, my dear," the lalafell said softly to her. "These bunnybuncles make little ones faster than you can imagine." [20:59]Agnos Le'maudit: "I've seen the bunnybuncles make eggs, I know how fast it is," the little girl told him with a straight face. The smile freezing on the lalafell's face garnered a loud guffaw from the Roegadyn for a moment, which in turn made the lalafell turn to glare at him. "So then you know that time is of the essence!" the miqo'te cut in while the two decided to have a little spat. "Yes..." the girl reluctantly agreed. "But do you have to go around smashing the eggs, then? They're so pretty, until they're just...goop. What happens if you leave the normal eggs?" [21:03]Syranelle Ironleaf: "If we leave the normal eggs out, they'll eventually rot. You know what happens when an egg gets rotten? If they get broken, they smell really foul and make life terrible!" the lalafell explained. "As pretty as they are, I don't think it would be worth leaving them and having someone accidentally break one. Do you?" The little girl sulked some more. "I guess not..." Nodding, the lalafell looked to the miqo'te, the roegadyn, and Brave Sir Robin. >> [21:05]Syranelle Ironleaf: "I can't thank the three of you enough for all your help. I wish I could reward you for everything you've done. Wait, I have it...!" He presented to each of them a Bunnybuncle egg. "NO!" they all shouted in unison, touching them to a gem, then smashing the raw eggs on the lalafell's head, each of them walking off, grumbling. "Well, one does not make omelets without breaking a few eggs." He shrugged, "Back to the drawing board."

MASS EFFECT ANDROMEDAAAAAAAA

This is gonna be a rambly mess of feelings because I played end game last night and have a lot of thoughts. I’m using a cut but if you’re reading on mobile just scroll really fast past this post.

Okay first of all, I played Sara Shepard, kept the default name (you get to hear it in dialogue!!!!) and default appearance (during the preview I was hesitant to waste even a second of play time on altering my appearance). I romanced Jaal because I really loved his emotional dialogue. I saved the salarian pathfinder instead of the krogan (I thought Drack was gonna kill me). I put colonies on every world, got everything up to 100% viability, and had a planet named after me. I saved Sloane but I couldn’t shoot Reyes in the back.

I got everyone but Peebee loyal because no where on the description box does it tell you how important getting remtech out of the vaults is. By the time I realized I needed it to trigger her mission, I had already cleared the vault and couldn’t go back in. So if you’re reading this and you haven’t cleared all the vaults yet, GET THE REMTECH. 

This is going to be so rambly and out of order but I just found the Jaal sex scene on youtube so let’s start with that. I try really hard not to judge other people’s player creations but this one is . . . not great. Please pay no attention to that. 

It’s like they tried to recreate Amy Schumer and could only work with what Bioware gave them. It’s uncanny valley for sure. 

I actually really like that the romances are so different??? That it’s not “and here you’ll get a romance scene and of course before endgame you’ll have the sex” and the formula from the first three games. I like that this was just a random date on Aya that ended up being, like, the ultimate romance moment of the game. It’s frickin great. 

I’ve since watched the Suvi romance just for some contrast and because she’s the one I’m least likely to want to romance on my own playthrough. Though Ryder has some HILARIOUSLY awkward dialogue (“I like you you’re pretty I like seeing you on the bridge.” Kallo: “kill. me. now.”) that romance doesn’t do nearly as much for me and lacks any semblance of the scorching alien sex scene you get with Jaal. No one takes their clothes off, for starters, and you definitely don’t get boobs and alien oral sex.  

So anyway: romance in this game is great. I’m pretty sure I could have romanced Vetra as a lady, because she was responsive and didn’t shut me down, and I really want to try that. Obviously Liam. Cora shot me down, and so did Lexi. Kallo and Drack weren’t even options, though I’d only romance Drack for the novelty of it. Gil’s only an option for dudes. 

Okay let’s talk about ENDGAME because I just played it and it’s still fresh in my mind. The endgame of Andromeda is what Mass Effect 3 should have been. YOUR WHOLE SQUAD SHOWS UP. ALL OF THEM ARE THERE IN THE FINAL BATTLE and since you can’t direct anyone it doesn’t matter that you can’t direct them either. As you’re charging through the forest in the Nomad all of the various fleets show up. I literally cried when Sloane showed up to make sure that everyone knew that Kadara had helped. 

SPEAKING OF KADARA let’s talk about open world. I’m really grateful that I spent the week before this playing Dragon Age because the maps in Andromeda are basically identical, only space age. It also employed the same method of highlighting loot (only they call it crates). So it’s nice that in the vaults where you need a path, you get the path of previous Mass Effect missions, but you still get open world exploring. 

THE VAULT PUZZLES lol so many videos on youtube of people bitterly complaining about the vault puzzles, I thought they were going to be murderously hard. One guy spent literally two hours trying to figure out a puzzle that you couldn’t use the vault key on. I finished it in under two minutes. It’s basically sudoku with shapes instead of numbers and oddly shaped boxes but it’s still sudoku. I got that. I did not have nearly as much luck with knowing which console to interact with at which time, but you know whaaaatever.

BACK TO FEELINGS also I had a lot of siblings feelings about Scott, and a ton of feelings about the fact that I, the sister, saved him, the brother. It was like Jill of the Jungle all over again. I want to play as male Ryder but I also don’t want to lose that feeling ever. 

I was playing on easy and the endgame was actually super easy. I mean yeah and architect showed up AND nullifiers AND observers AND whatever the ones that make other ones are called, but honestly with your whole squad there it barely mattered? By the time I figured out what Scott was doing and actually paid attention to the architect they’d already mostly taken it down themselves. 

It was just nice to feel like all of the work I’d put into the galaxy paid off. That all the other pathfinders showed up and had all their moments. That you fought beside salarians and turians and also the angara. 

WHICH ALSO OKAY so when you get to choose a representative to the Nexus you can choose the Moshae??? Love that that’s an option. 

AND back to combat I really miss the power wheel, even though this made combat go a lot faster. I didn’t like that I couldn’t direct my squad powers, so combos largely happened by accident, or I made my own with my powers. I never could figure out the mechanics of the favorite profiles, let alone how to switch on the fly like they showed in the combat video. Nor could I find any guide online. 60 hours of game play and I couldn’t figure it out. So much for that being intuitive, Bioware. BUT, I like that there’s finally a reason that Shepard I mean Ryder has so many extra powers and abilities, and Sara teaching Sam how to be a real boy was really cute. ALSO CUTE: THE SPACE HAMSTER. 

And idk I just started thinking about the throwbacks to ME3, the fact that you meet ex-Cerberus scientists in the wilds of Kadara and Conrad Verner’s sister in the port. That Zaeed Massani’s son is in the desert of Eos. That fallout from the Overlord Project follows you to Andromeda. There are so many interesting easter eggs for those who played the original trilogy but this also was really accessible for anyone who’s never played the originals. 

Not related: I had some HILARIOUS bugs in later stages. My ship wouldn’t load sometimes and I found this out because I went up the stairs to the conference center and literally fell out of the spaceship into space because the floor hadn’t loaded. Related: I like that falling off shit doesn’t get you the dreaded death music, that you just pop back up right next to whatever you fell off. 

I like some of the social issues it touched on. The trans woman you meet in the colony on Eos who came to Andromeda to start her new life as a woman. Gil deciding to have a baby with his friend Jill. 

COLONIZATION BABIES. Y’all I want to read (or write) the fic where plural marriages are a thing, and Sara proposes to everyone (including Drack) on the Tempest to make sure they always get to stay together and also because they’re all pretty conveniently in love with each other in various ways because what they really love and want to keep doing is exploring and pathfinding. I want one of them thinking maybe I want to colonize and farming for a bit and being okay at it but ultimately finding it boring as shit so they come back and they’re given a bit of shit for it but it’s okay. I want Sara having Liam’s baby but sleeping in Jaal’s bed most nights while Liam hangs out in Peebee’s escape pod. I want Cora having Gil’s second baby and letting him name it whatever he wants, which is how she ends up with a child named after a drive coil. I want them having petty fights about who left crumbs on the counter in the galley that Lexi tries to mediate. I want them to go to port thinking they want nothing more than to not see each other for a few days and then to end up back in each others presence in an hour because they had a thought they couldn’t wait to share. This may or may not have been influenced by the latest book in the Expansion series, but that’s a different post. 

Because, finally, I LOVE THIS CREW. I started this game off just so unsure of Cora and her talking about what a poooowerful biotic she is and how she scared everyone in the Milky Way and blah blah blah but by the time I finished her loyalty mission I was literally crying about how much I loved her. Last night after endgame I finally finished all of the piddly requests and requirements to make movie night happen and it honestly was the best fucking thing to end a game on. Next play through I’m waiting to do that the very last thing, because it felt like the end of the party at the Citadel DLC, everyone sitting around on a couch and laughing and just being their perfect selves. 

In conclusion: 

Detractors: no power wheel, no squad powers, actually wonky facial animation, some game glitches (I could never complete a mission on the Nexus because I’d already scanned a thing and it kept telling me I hadn’t.) (previously mentioned falling through the floor of my ship)

Positive: heavy on feelings, so many feelings, all of the feelings, my crew, INTERESTING AS FUCK stories, choices that matter, endgame appearances by everyone, twin feelings, open world exploring

EDITED TO ADD: OMFG THE QUARIANS. WE GONNA GET QUARIANS IN ANDROMEDA 2. 

Title: Having The Faith To Soar

Fandom: Yuri On Ice

Ships: Gen

AO3, Previous

Chapter Two - Practice, Practice, Practice

Hello! I’m Vera Kotova, a self-taught amateur skater. Through an unlikely twist of chance, THE Yuri Plisetsky saw me skating and was impressed enough to call his coach! Now I’ve been whisked away to St. Petersburg so I can train under one of Coach Feltsman’s associates. Meanwhile, the Grand Prix Series continues with the Cup of China! I can’t wait to see Yuri skate again! 

Beep. Beep. Beep.

Vera groaned and rolled over to reach for her noisy phone on the nightstand. The screen glared with a notification: Ballet Practice. Vera practically rolled out of bed and turned the alarm off.

Ever since moving to St. Petersburg, she had a very strict schedule to keep. Six mornings a week she had alternating physical training and ballet practice. Of course, she had school after morning practice five days a week. Her favorite time of day was the afternoon when she was able to practice ice skating.

“You might have some potential but you currently lack a solid foundation to build on,” Coach Feltsman had told her, “If you want to seriously compete, training needs to become your life.”

What else did she have in life anyway? A dead father and a mother that barely paid attention to her. Vera would gladly throw her body and soul into the only thing she did have: ice skating.  

So, while her sore body longed to sleep another hour or two, Vera quickly got ready and left for the ballet studio. As she exited the apartment building, the sounds of the city – cars, people, seagulls – invaded her ears. The tall buildings and crowded streets were vastly different from the sparse town she’d lived in up until now. It was still a little overwhelming; she hadn’t yet felt comfortable wandering outside her bubble of apartment-gym-ballet studio-school-ice rink.

Maybe if she asked nicely when the season was over Yuri would go with her to explore the city? He did say he’d check in on her progress, even if he hadn’t been specific on when. But with the Cup of China quickly approaching and then the Grand Prix Finals after that… Then Nationals and then World’s… Vera wasn’t expecting to see Yuri Plisetsky again any time soon.

That was okay. She’d work really hard so that next time saw him, he wouldn’t regret giving her this chance.

Vera’s drifting thoughts cut off as she pushed the door open and entered the ballet studio.

The rink was strangely empty and quiet when Vera got there. She checked her phone and realized that she’d somehow managed to arrive a good fifteen minutes early. It was still unusual because this rink was typically open to the public right before the skating class. Maybe someone had booked it earlier?

Vera shrugged, not caring about the specifics, and went to put on her skates (that they were truly hers and not rentals still made her grin). She hadn’t gotten a chance to skate alone in weeks. There was no way she wasn’t going to take advantage of the empty rink.

As she skated out onto the ice, she put her earbuds in and stuffed her phone in her pocket.

Sic mea vita est temporaria, cupit ardenter caritatem aeternam

Vera hadn’t attempted skating Agape since moving to the city. Now she felt a difference in her skating. Her balance was even more stable; her motions were both more fluid and precise. She smiled softly before going into her first jump.

The sound and feel of blades against the ice as she made a perfect landing was beautiful and thrilling. Feeling even more confident, she continued to flow with the music.

Once she and the music came to a still, Vera blinked and realized that she’d gathered a small audience. Coach Lebedeva was standing rinkside with a bemused expression. A few of Vera’s rinkmates were there as well; their faces filled with a mixture of excitement and disbelief. One girl, who had her hair in a high ponytail, had her phone held up to take a video.

“Um…”

Vera’s cheeks felt a little warm; and, she wasn’t sure what to say. However, her rinkmates broke the silence for her.

“That was so cool!”

“I didn’t know you could land an axel!”

“How long did it take you to learn that?”

“Thanks. I first managed it about six months ago. And a few years,” she managed to answer.  

Before anyone could say more, Coach Lebedeva clapped her hands to get their attention. “Alright everyone, stretch and get your stakes on. And, Anya, don’t post that video online without Vera’s permission.”

Anya guiltily put her phone down, shooting an apologetic smile, and then went to get her skates on.

Once the rest of her rinkmates joined Vera on the ice, Anya skated up to her, “Some of us are watching the Cup of China at my house later. Do you want to come?”

Vera wanted to say that she’d go but the words got stuck in her throat.

“…I can’t. I have to finish a project for school,” she lied.

“Oh, maybe next time.”

“Yeah.”

The awkward pause was broken as Coach Lebedeva instructed them into edge drills. As it could be expected from a group of pre-teens, the class was an organized chaos. Students laughed and joked while skating in every direction; and, the coach would call out corrections or glide over to help when someone was struggling. Despite all that, practice always seemed to go by quickly to Vera. Soon enough her rinkmates were heading off the ice. When Vera didn’t follow them, the coach gave her a look but said nothing. Vera took that as permission to continue and stretched into the Biellmann position again.

As parents arrived to pick up her rinkmates, she tried not to pay them any attention. However, it was impossible to completely block out the drifting chatter.  

“Anya,” the voice was soft and sweet, “How many of your friends are coming?”

Anya listed off half the class. Excited giggles echoed across the room as Anya’s mother began ushering the group toward the door. Vera frowned as she switched the positions of her legs and went into a spin.

It was only after all her rinkmates had left that Coach Lebedeva’s called out, “That’s enough for today. If you practice much longer, you’ll miss the men’s short programs.”

Since the Cup of China didn’t start for another hour, Vera figured the coach was just saying that because she wanted to leave but couldn’t with a student still on the ice.

“I’m coming,” she replied as she skated off the rink.

That Seung-gil guy was about finished with his short program; the crowd cheering as the commentators exclaimed in excitement over the flawless combination he just landed. It was at that exact moment reality suddenly hit Yuri like a freight train.

“Yuri,” Yakov’s voice was distant, “Come on. You’re up next.”

He felt rooted to the spot, unable to move. The ground seemed oddly distant and blurred as well.

“Yuri?” A hand lightly placed on his shoulder. Lilia. “What’s wrong?”

Wrong?

Grandpa had rarely been able to come to his competitions but he always watched them on tv. Now, for the first time since Yuri moved up to the Senior division, Grandpa wasn’t sitting at home with the tv on to watch him skate.

A sob was building in the back of his throat. Yuri bit it back as a kernel of molten anger settled in the pit of his stomach. He absolutely refused to breakdown here and now! He could get through this! He could get out there and give one hell of a performance!

He just needed to move.

“Yura.”

He glanced around until his eyes found Otabek. His friend’s expression was as stoic as ever but Yuri knew him well enough read between the lines. There was no pity found in Otabek’s gaze, just the certainty that no matter what Yuri would give it his all. That he would soldier through.

“Davai.”

Yuri took a deep breath and then gave Otabek a thumbs up.

“It’s time,” Yakov said.

Yuri nodded and began walking toward the rink. He had a medal to win.  

The next night found Yuri kicking the locker room wall and muttering insults under his breath. He honestly didn’t mind losing gold to Otabek but he lost silver to Seung-gil?! What the hell?!

“Between the gold from France and this bronze, your spot at the finals is secure,” Yakov stated from behind him, “You’ll do better there.”

Yuri glared at an invisible point. “I will.”

Hours later Yuri knocked on a hotel door. It took a minute for it to open and reveal Otabek. Seeing Yuri, he opened the door wider and shifted aside. Yuri walked right in and immediately sprawled on the couch.

“I’ve sat on more comfortable benches.”

Otabek simply nodded before nudging Yuri so that he’d make room. Yuri grumbled but complied. Then Otabek just waited for the rant he knew was coming.

“Yakov didn’t even lecture me! He always lectures me after I skate!”

“He’s trying to be sensitive.”

“Well, it’s weird! I don’t want him tip-toeing around me!”

Otabek hummed in response.

“It’s bad enough that Katsudon and Viktor keep calling to check on me,” he continued with a grimace, “Bleh! I swear if Lilia goes easy on me when we get back to St. Petersburg I’ll kick someone.”

Otabek’s mouth tugged up ever so slightly, unnoticeable to everyone but those that knew him best.

“Not Lilia,” he said.

Yuri gave him an incredulous look. “Hell no! I don’t have a death wish!”

There was a beat of quiet as his word choice sank in. Then Yuri rolled off the couch and ended up face down on the floor.

“The carpet is more comfortable than that stupid couch. Someone should complain to the hotel.”

“I’ll be sure to mention it,” Otabek replied, his voice so flat that it was impossible to tell if he were joking or not.

“Good.” Yuri pushed himself back up and leaned against the couch. “We’re still going to Beijing Zoo before the exhibition show tomorrow, right.”

Otabek nodded. “You’d disown me if I tried to back out.”

“Damn right I would.” His eyes suddenly went wide like he remembered something important. “Oh! Watch this.”    

Yuri then pulled out his phone and swiped until he found the video he wanted. Otabek leaned over Yuri’s shoulder as he started the video. It was of a young girl skating with familiar movements.

“The kid you mentioned?”

“Yeah. Yakov’s friend sent the video yesterday,” Yuri answered, “Would you believe she’s only been formally training for less than two months?”

Otabek watched to the end before replying, “Then she has overwhelming natural talent.”

“Right!”

The students were gathering their things and trailing out the door when Vera’s phone started playing Allegro Appassionato in B minor. The teacher gave her a disapproving look but couldn’t say anything since it was time to leave. Vera stuck her tongue out once the teacher glanced away. She then unlocked her phone to see a text:

Vera let out an excited noise that earned her a few odd looks from her classmates. She didn’t notice though as she quickly gathered her stuff and zipped up her coat. Then she was out the door.

The air outside was chill; and, the ground was damp from it drizzling earlier in the day. Vera’s breath turned to mist as she glanced around. It didn’t take long to spot Yuri. He was leaning against the fence with his hoodie pulled over his head and scrolling through his phone.

“Yuri!”

He looked up as she sprinted over to him.

“Didn’t you just get back from China? I watched your programs!”

“We got back a few days ago,” he replied, “Come on. Yakov will yell if we’re late.”

Yuri began walking down the sidewalk; and, Vera had to practically jog to keep up with his long strides. She filled the walk with questions about his trip. While Yuri was happy to answer general questions about China, his replies about the competition itself were short and sharp. Vera fell silent after a few minutes.

It didn’t take much longer for the building to come into sight; its sign had ‘Sports Champions Club’ spelled out around the flag. There were a few people milling outside the entrance but they weren’t dressed to skate or workout. Yuri suddenly stopped in his tracks. Vera stopped a step later and looked back at him questioningly.

“Da-” He glanced at Vera and made an annoyed sound. “Tch. Can’t the reporters let me train in peace.”

Since they had yet to notice him, Yuri grabbed Vera’s hand and started walking.

“We’ll sneak past them and go through the back.”

He led her around the side of the building to an ‘employees only’ door. Either someone had left it unlocked or it’d been purposely left that way for this situation. Whichever reason, they were able to get inside without any issues.

Once they’d passed through a storage area, they entered the main lobby. Vera blinked as she took everything in. It was large but not overly crowded; just a few employees going about their work and a group of men with hockey shirts talking to each other. An employee greeted Yuri and gave Vera a curious look but everyone else ignored them.

They entered the rink then. Only Mila (THE Mila Babicheva!) was on the ice, spinning and jumping as she practiced what Vera recognized as her short program for the season.

“Woah.”

“There you are!” Coach Feltsman shouted.

Yuri joined his coach by the ice, while Vera trailed behind him. He began stretching as he replied, “There are reporters out front again.”

“It’s because you refused interviews after the Cup of China.”

“They can stay out of it,” he replied darkly.

“You won’t be able to dodge them forever.”

Vera, feeling a little lost by their argument, went back to watching Mila skate. How cool was it that she would be sharing a rink with both Yuri Plisetsky AND Mila Babicheva, if only for a day?

Mila’s short program practice run soon ended. She glided over and grabbed a water bottle, listening while Coach Feltsman critiqued. However, she soon spotted Vera and leaned over the rink wall.

“So this is the little kitten you’ve adopted, Yuri,” she said with a wide grin.

Vera blinked. “Kitten?”

“Shut up, hag!”

“I can still lift you.”

Yuri groaned in annoyance. Mila turned back to Vera.

“What’s your name?”

“Vera Kotova.”

“Kotova, huh?” She laughed. “See, she is a kitten.”

Yuri rolled his eyes and went to put on his skates, grumbling all the while. Mila continued smiling after him.

“…Um,” Vera said as she tapped Mila’s arm to get her attention, “You’re my favorite female skater.”

Mila stared at her a moment before shouting, “Yuri! Yakov! We’re keeping her!”  

Yakov just shook his head at his students’ antics. “Mila, work on that step sequence again. Yuri, warm up.”

Mila returned to skating, while Yuri finished lacing his skates and went to the opposite side of the rink. Vera stood there not sure what she should do until Coach Feltsman snapped at her.

“What are you waiting for? Stretch and then get your skates on.”

“Y-yes, sir!”

It wasn’t long before she too was on the ice, working on basic drills before she moved on to practicing her jumps. Maybe it was because she had been watching Yuri and Mila practice out of the corner of her eye but a thought suddenly popped into her mind: What if she tried a double?

With that idea urging her on, Vera jumped higher and spun faster. A full rotation… 540 degrees… a full 720 degrees! Vera’s heart leapt in excitement for a split second. Then her blade landed wrong. She tried to counter-balance but it was too late. She hit the ice with a solid thump.

“Ow.”

The sound of blades gliding to a stop echoed in her ear. When Vera looked up, both Yuri and Mila were staring down at her in mild concern.

“I’m okay,” she said as she scrambled up.

“Vera!” Coach Feltsmen yelled from the side of the rink, “Have you been given permission to start practicing doubles yet?”

Vera glanced down guilty. “…No.”

The coach’s frown deepened, while Mila snickered.

“You fit right in.”

Vera blushed at the compliment.

“You botched the landing because your foot was angled sloppily,” Yuri commented.

She nodded and then glanced back over at Coach Feltsman with pleading eyes. “Can I try again?”

He stared at her a moment before answering, “We might as well see if you can manage a half decent double salchow before practice is over.”  

Ascendance of a Bookworm Episode 15 Recap: Apprentice Priestess

Hello and welcome to the first recap for season two of Ascendance of a Bookworm. Each week, we’ll go through the latest episode of the show and give a quick summary of what’s happening. Any developments in the plot, characters, new technological advances, and so on.

Before we truly begin, though, let's go over a quick recap of the first season to catch everyone up to speed. Motosu Urano was a librarian who really liked reading all kinds of books, and then one day was crushed when a full shelf fell on her. She woke up as Main, a 5-year-old girl in a world where books are extremely rare and pretty much only available to the rich and those working for the church.

  Be warned, there are spoilers for Ascendance of a Bookworm Season 1 and Part 2 Episode 1, "Apprentice Priestess," ahead.

        Luckily, she retained her memories from her original world and so is able to devise a plan. If she can’t realistically read any books, then she’ll make them, instead. This leads to her trying out different methods from various ancient civilizations, all while working around the fact that, as a young child with a constitution so weak she can barely walk around outside, no one is willing to seriously listen to her ideas.

Along the way, she also tries out other ideas to help out, such as making a shampoo to help when her hair feels like sandpaper, and a hair ornament for her sister Turi’s baptism. The former gets the attention of a local merchant, who begins financing her attempt to make and sell paper; while the latter is something the merchant guild master was looking for as a present for his granddaughter.

It turns out the guildmaster’s granddaughter has the same illness as Main, which had been causing her to pass out when she exerts herself and become bedridden for days on end with a high fever. The illness is called the Devouring, and is essentially a person having an excess of mana slowly killing them. The only way to stave off the Devouring is to have a supply of expensive magic items, which is effectively a death sentence for a struggling family like Main’s.

    At the end of the season, Main discovers that the church can supply her with both the magic items and a library, and manages to convince the High Priest (by using “the Crushing,” which is the mana from the Devouring used to crush one’s opponents) to take her on as a blue-robed apprentice rather than grey-robed, meaning she will be treated akin to nobility, and to let her continue living at home.

    Thus, we start season two.

In episode one, we get some recapping of the final episode of season one, where Main was accepted into the Church as a blue robe, but with some more details as the High Priest learned more about Main’s specific situation. Namely that Lutz would need to walk her to the cathedral every day in case she suddenly passed out, and requesting that Main Studio, where Main and Lutz have been making paper, could stay open. Main even offered that the studio could be staffed by grey-robed apprentices—mainly orphans given manual labor—and that they could be paid or their pay could be donations to the church.

When the High Priest brings up the requests with the Head Priest, he agrees to allow the studio to continue operating since it could serve as a source of income. When they talk about Main’s retainers, they decide on one each from the Head and High Priests, and for the final one the Head Priest decides to give Main the most troublesome grey robe specifically to annoy her as much as possible, clearly showing that he only cares about Main as a source of mana and money.

    Outside of the Church, there is a subplot brewing. Lutz’s mother mentions to Main that a man was looking for her and knew about her studio when only Benno and guildmaster should’ve known where it was. Then Benno mentions that someone broke into the Merchants Guild recently and that he thought it seemed like a noble’s doing. Finally, Gunther and Otto talk over drinks and the conversation eventually turns to how Main being so talented but frail could lead to her being abducted, and how Gunther is in a position to keep track of any nobles going in or out of the city.

    In the meantime, Main teachers Corinna, Otto’s wife, how to make hair ornaments and in doing so sells her hair ornament designs to Benno, Corinna’s brother, for one large and seven small gold pieces.

At the pound cake tasting that was mentioned late in the first season, we get to see how much Main is changing some of the people around her. Benno says that if he doesn’t have access to everything he needs to recreate Main’s baking recipes, he’ll just need to make those things himself, which is exactly the mentality Main had about making paper.

    At the cathedral entrance, a grey-robed apprentice is waiting for Main to escort her to see the High Priest. Before any other conversation, we get several indications that Main isn’t necessarily welcome here, as the escort apprentice is walking too fast for her, a church noble insults her, and the various other grey-robed church members glare at her as she passes. When Main meets with the High Priest, she officially becomes an apprentice of the church with an oath taking ceremony.

After the oath, Main is given her robes, her official outfit for the season. The High Priest then introduces her to her three retainers: Fran, the one who met her at the gate; Delia, who is one year older than Main and works for the High Priest; and Gil, the problem child.

    What did you think of the first episode of Ascendance of a Bookworm Part 2? Any thoughts as to where the plot might be going (make sure to keep it spoiler free if you already know!)?

    ---

Kevin Matyi is a freelance features writer for Crunchyroll. He's been watching anime for as long as he can remember, and his favorite shows tend to be shonen and other action series.

  Do you love writing? Do you love anime? If you have an idea for a features story, pitch it to Crunchyroll Features!

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