I do think its really important to remember that SY was suppose to be the villain character but its only because of his kindness and newly gained life that he didn’t end as one. In the very beginning of the story we learn that Peerless Cucumber Bro often left comments on how SJ didn’t get his dues and needed to be punished more, and only after he transmigrated did he acknowledge how awful of a death SJ had. He also made point to explain that he only read the book for LBH, which he noted to enjoy his decisive actions and deft ability to kill. Markedly, he liked his brutality and personality over the erotica that the majority of PIDW fans enjoyed. Peerless Cucumber Bro is someone who loves action and the ability to cut right to the chase, something that he does not do and most likely has difficulty with in his world.

Speaking of, it is something to note that Peerless Cucumber bro is rich. He had head chefs, he could pay for a 6k+ chapter book of erotica in 20 days, he noted that he could not understand SJs envy and ambition for power since he lives well, and he even noted to himself that his family was well off. He is incredibly wealthy, and it shows. Which is important to note because he, not once, showed any guilt or remorse on dying and leaving his family behind. Yes, he sometimes refers to people as being similar to his family but he never showed any pain for losing that life like he did when he lost LBH. This is important because I genuinely think SY was depressed and self destructive to himself, which goes against popular HC that he was chronically/terminally ill (I do like this HC and like how its portrayed in fanfiction). It would explain how he ended up dying all alone by himself, and how blase he was to his own life and death.

SQQ is a self destructive force who ended up dying three times, and didn’t feel anything about death itself. He was worried about others and the effect it had on them, but for himself it was up and on again like it never happened. He does not care for his health, had self isolated as SY to the point he died alone, and has a horrible self esteem to the point that he continuously agrees when other people put him down and often calls himself the villain. Even though we have seen the evidence of someone who is always being thrust into new situations and awful plots, he calls himself lazy and easy going. He hides his thoughts and feelings behind his fan and has a remarkably thin face. At the very base of his actions and his thoughts, he is self destructive, powerful, and smart. This is the set up for a villain.

However, when shown the actual people in front of him and forced to act as SJ did towards LBH and his disciples, he flinches from it. He notes that it happening in front of him was different. His entire self soothing comedy monologue went quiet when he had to enforce the Endless Abyss scene, and grieved for the childish innocence he killed from one of his favourite people. SY was set up to be the villain and obviously thinks of himself as one, but can not act as one. If he had the choice LBH would have been his sticky sweet white lotus disciple for as long as LBH wished to be.

His kindness, as seen in the book, is what turned him from being “the scumbag villain” to the protagonist we see in the novels. Which, yes, he is a protagonist! He even has the protag halo that LBH has and its very funny in the meta way for SQQ not to realize this, but thats for another post. But he loves his disciples, he loves his peak lord siblings, he loves his Binghe, he loves his new life, and he is kind. That is what kept him from being the villain he sees himself as, his kindness and love for others. Whether that be romantic, platonic, or familial, he loves the people he has met and he treats them kindly. That is why it is important to remember that he was set up as the villain by everything in the story we do not see, but what we do see is him continuously changing the story to fit a new genre that lets as many people as he can save live. Sorry sorry, I just think about SY being set up as a villain so much. It changes a lot of views I have on the series when I remember the duality of SYs story and character development.

we get it! okay!!!! you hate biden!!!!!! but when trump wins because you won't fucking vote for the only other viable option and makes things infinitely worse, that blood will be on YOUR hands!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! fuck off!!

(This isn't bait, and you don't need to answer it if you don't want to). What's your beef with heartstopper?

The author and I have the same favorite mangaka but they tried to claim her as a "one of the good ones defying all problematic elements (of the gross bl genre of course)" without knowing that . One of the only other scanlated works from same mangaka is a psychological horror incest BL with every trigger warning under the sun

Also I hate white British people but that's on me #listening and learning

Do yall like, know how to enjoy something w/o constantly criticizing it? don't you want to enjoy something-- anything for what it is? if it gives you joy and makes you happy, you dont have to be critical and pick a part about it to be a 'real' fan of the thing, or to show you're aware of the whatever problems it has.

just liking and enjoying it is enough.

I have to write a relatively long German paper, and man its just so difficult for me. The pro side is that I can pick any topic I want, so of course I picked Charles VI. But I've literally not written any German in months, and I'm almost 100% sure our prof doesn't actually read them. I should just write and submit boy king fic....

the school arc to me is so good because it drags ciel out of his position as a powerful figure and literally places him in the shoes of the person he could have been. the circus arc ALSO drags him out of his position as big bad queens watch dog/head of the phantomhive estate but the school arc feels like a mockery of a future that never was. this is what he could have been had his parents not died. and even then its NOT because he will never be that kid.

he never was.

everyone who is in the stanley parable fandom should somehow get sucked into the rabbit hole of the story and or characters and or the concept the game presents . not like ohhh i looove the narratorso much heres my design and lore for them for it kind of rabbit hole where you fixate on this character that like. you are making uo backstory for to the point it deviates from canon because youve gone too far from the game details or whatever but but really aanalyze the game the moments the dialogue for just a moment . mmfind the meaning in the words . find somethin g profound in the data the papers the desks the situation as a whole . you cant just . romanticize the characters. without. like. understanding them first . tou cwnt do anything with the characters until you inderstand them at a gut wrenching level . at least brush uo on their wiki once in a while ? play the game ? every now and then ? treat stanley right ? anyway if you like the stanley parable so much why cant you tell me about 432 and their situation . how profoundly sad their existance is and how you trea t them. how about cookie9? why do you hate themm so much. because of a review ? tou antagonize them for what ? the narrators doing ? bexause the narrator what . yeah . tou cant even explain his actions . go go play the game and hav eit rewrite your brain . go down the rabbit hole and bask in the true horror and unrealism of their situation

thinking about lester for once. and about how i usually don't think about him.

lester is the youngest child of a middle-class couple who could have done without having any children, never mind three. i see lester as being trudy and victor's marriage saving baby, their chance to have another go at that whole parenting thing, seeing as the twins turned out to be such hardwork. this baby, they think, will be easier. but then it turns out the sinclairs just... don't really like children.

lester falls to the wayside, because not only are his parents just not that interested in him, but the twins just take up so much of their time.

the twins take up so much of their time.

lester was destined to be overshadowed in life. how couldn't he be, when his older siblings stand out so badly?

they were conjoined twins, a quality which even now (let alone in the early 70s) is looked at with a certain sort of morbid curiosity. even after they were separated, vincent still bears the scars of "what" they were. bo is labelled as the "troublemaker" and, as they get older, he lives up to it. vincent is labelled as the "child prodigy" and, as they get older, he tries to keep living up to it. they cut a striking picture, six feet tall and hostile to outsiders. but it's not just that, they're weird. they have an interest in the macabre, they listen to loud music and as teenagers they were just about the only people under 50 who go to the matinee showings of baby jane and east of eden and house of usher the theatre puts on for the old folk in town. the twins talk to each other and nobody else understands.

lester, on the other hand, is unremarkable. he didn't need as much as the twins did in terms of extra care (which probably, ultimately contributed to his neglect). in all the ways that make vince and bo fundamentally strange, lester is fundamentally ordinary. and sure, maybe he's weird, but not in the enigmatic way that vincent is, or the intimidating way that bo is.

there's not a doubt in my mind that lester is interesting. his knowledge, his interests, his morals and his choices. all of these things make him interesting, but in comparison to his brothers -- the terrible twins -- he isn't interesting enough for people. people don't notice him.

lester needs someone who is enamoured with him, even with the twins casting their shadow over him. he needs someone who doesn't see the twins first and him as an after thought.

ill be skinny. it will happen. ive been trying for so long now. once it was just trying to eat less and be smaller but not much real focus on my physical appearance. now its all about that. 11 years of my ed and 7 years of wanting what i want now. i dont live with my parents anymore. i have more control. i will achieve it.

there was a time where id eat 300-700 consistently. ill get that back. i will.

i want to compile a list of horror media that people need to watch before they call genloss groundbreaking incredible material. like yall are soooo so deeply entrenched in copium toting this thing around like its the best piece of horror media in the world when like. theres no horror. there has literally been no horror. how are we watching the same thing. go watch gemini home entertainment or marble hornets or daisy brown or unedited footage of a bear or this house has people in it and then come back to me. dont fucking talk to me until youve consumed some horror media thats actually good first!!!!!!!!

there's a point at which someone's fear of being a dick wraps back around to them just being a dick anyways

maybe im just a grump but honestly i treat stuff i dont want on ao3 with a very "i do not see it" kinda attitude. like, yeah, i think trollfics are annoying, and a friend made a strong case recently for why it's not really an appropriate place for ai-generated stuff either but like. any time i see something like that my response is "damn that's annoying" and then i ignore it.

there's very occasionally been like, actual campaigns to annoy users (like that time assholes put like 300 tags on all their trollfics to "protest"(?) something??), and in those cases i'll actually bother to report people, but if its only like 2 people that annoy me i don't see much point. they can go be annoying out of my sight i dont care.

moments like this when im really glad im a sad little cynic who always considers the worst possible outcome and never lets herself truly get comfortable and trust the good things in her life to stay there and builds her life around trying to soften the blows of the eventual disappointments just waiting around the corner lol never leaving my edgy teenager era peace and love

legitimately what the fuck was that

making that WF video was like. reminding me how much and how deeply Mo cared for Lee it hurts soo so so bad

Holy topic change batman

How did we even get here