“i’ve never done a ghost story before...”

Till death do us part: Matt and Lisa are torn apart – but why?

3 MIN READ

PLATFORM 7 | ITVX THURSDAY 

This supernatural thriller – based on Louise Doughty’s 2019 novel of the same name – follows Lisa Evans, a young woman who frequents platform seven of a railway station. After witnessing a tragic event at the depot, Lisa’s blurred memories come into focus, unearthing a connection between that moment and her own life – and death. The four-parter stars Jasmine Jobson (Top Boy) as Lisa; Toby Regbo (A Discovery Of Witches) as her boyfriend Matt; Rhiannon Clements (Hollyoaks’ Summer Ranger) as Lisa’s best friend Izzy, and telly veteran Phil Davis as Edward – a man with an unearthly connection to Lisa. Here, Jasmine, and Toby tell Inside TV more… 

Hi, both! What appealed to you about this series?

Jasmine It has to be the supernatural thing. There’s something about being a spirit and being around people without their knowledge, and playing about with them when they’ve irritated you! And I hadn’t played anybody like Lisa before, so it was also about trying something new.

Toby This is the first modern piece I’ve done in ages. I seem to just do period dramas! So to make the switch towards psychological realism, I feel as though you can get away with more. And I’ve never done a ghost story before. 

The doctor will see you now: Matt and Lisa feel the chemistry

It must feel strange not acknowledging that the other actor is there? 

Jasmine Yeah, it definitely felt weird being in scenes yet not really being involved. I had to get used to not having anything to say! 

Toby Trying to pretend that somebody isn’t there is surprisingly difficult. It’s interesting how your body just responds to somebody being there, like trying to pass right beside someone without making any little movements that you naturally do to accommodate another human being. 

How was it playing those moments where Lisa walks through walls?

Jasmine So that took a while to figure out. I’d walk through open doors, and I accidentally pushed a door open once! But once we knew what we were doing, it was wicked. 

Toby, do you think that Matt believes in ghosts?

Toby No – I think, as a doctor, he’s a man of science. I don’t think he has any inkling that Lisa is standing behind him, nor that he has a sense thatt there’s life after death. Which is interesting in terms of where the story goes…

There’s also an important relationship between Edward and Lisa – Jasmine, what was it like working with Phil Davis? 

Jasmine Oh, Phil was absolutely amazing. He’s such a phenomenal actor. Our scenes together were very special. It was a delight to have him at the station playing Edward – who has quite an interesting secret of his own…

Do you believe in ghosts?

Jasmine I sometimes see spirits and I can tell if there’s a presence around me. One thing that I’ve always been aware of is you must never say hello to them if they’re in your home. You need sage and frankincense, and you need to bless your house. 

Toby I haven’t had any first-hand experiences with the supernatural and I’ve always tended to err on the side of the material. However, that doesn’t mean to say that when I’m staying at my friend’s place in the Dorset countryside, when the moon’s out and there are owls, that I don’t sprint across the lawn to get back inside the house! 

CHIEF in-spectre 

RHIANNON CLEMENTS TELLS US HOW HER ALTER EGO TURNS AMATEUR SLEUTH… 

When it comes to her best friend’s untimely passing, Rhiannon’s character is fixed on finding the truth… 

“The big thing for Izzy is that she doesn’t believe Lisa’s death was suicide,” she says. “She thinks that there’s something else to be uncovered – and won’t let it lie till she knows what.” 

As for believing in the supernatural, making the series led to a spooky coincidence for the star...

“Phil’s character has a dog, and in some scenes, it barks at what’s seemingly an empty space,” shares Rhiannon. “I recently moved into a Victorian house, and my dog has now started barking at empty spaces. It does leave me with chills!”

Tassonomie fantastiche e dove trovarle

Che sarei curioso eh...

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Türchen Nr. 5: Die etwas anderen Weihnachtsgeschenke

*Werbung* Herzlich Willkommen bei meinem 5. Adventskalendertürchen! So schön, dass du da bist. Im 5. Türchen lautet das Motto “Mit Liebe schenken“. Seit ihr noch auf der Suche nach einem Weihnachtsgeschenk für eure Liebsten? Aber ihr wollt nicht irgendeinen Gutschein oder irgendwelchen Krims Krams schenken, wo gefühlt jeder schon 5000x mal Zuhause stehen hat. Na dann, hab ich euch hier ein…

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Just a jacket

requested by @vampireatemycats​ 32 "you need to work on your people skills," 42 "is that mine?' "are you refurring to me or the shirt?" Derek hale x reader A/N i know this one is a little short i just wanted to get it out quick the others will be longer but i hope you like it

He doesn't know when it started but Derek found himself not dreading the pack meetings in his loft once a week as Scott demanded be hosted there since Derek was the alpha, don't get it wrong he still hated the uncontrolled teenage hormones stenching up his home or how Stiles would bring over all the pieces of his wall of crazy and spread it across every inch available. but he always found it worth it when she'd walk in suddenly her scent stuck to everything she touched and the dusty old police files seemed like the most interesting thing when the contents fell from her lips as she read aloud. that's why he's leaning against the island watching the door like a hawk.

you were late, you were never late you always came early to help him set out snacks which he only had because they were your favorite not that he'd ever admit it. "Hey!" Stiles yelped when Derek reached out and yanked his arm. "Where's Yn?' "What!" rolling his eyes at the spazz he readly doent know how you deal with him, "Y/n isn't here where. is. she.?" he sighed out trying again making Stiles bristle up, he sensed Dereks' weird obsession over you no matter how many times Lydia and Alison say it's a normal crush he refuses to see it like that. No way sourwolf could have normal emotions, nope. "Why do you care? matter of fact while we are asking where things are where is the food? drinks? little dog treats you nibble on at night?" Lydia could see the older wolf getting irritated at the game Stiles was playing and decided to break it up. "She has dinner plans tonight in town." no longer than it took her to finish her sentence he was already out the door, the strawberry blonde smiled pulling her phone out to warn you, she was definitely your biggest shipper. in the center of downtown becon hills, you were sat at your favorite diner books laid open across the table being ignored as you laughed at some joke the young deputy told you the smile on his face slowly fell as he locked eyes on something behind you. before you could ask what was wrong two hands landed with a heavy thud on the table as Derek glared at Parrish, "Don't you have better things to do?" at the flash of Dereks eyes, Parrish just sighed and gathered his things. not without saying goodbye to you drawing out a low growl that only the two supernatural could hear. once he's out the door Derek drops into the empty chair and flipped through one of the books set out like nothing happened. raising your eyebrow at him gaining nothing but a shrug, "That was rude." "So is being late." he rebuttled, shooting you a look before going back the the book which you know he wasnt actully reading seeing as it was upside down. 'For the record, I texted Stiles and Scott that i was busy tonight," for some reason wanting him to know you didn't just ditch. "Next time text me." he hummed, meeting your eyes, a smirk pulled up of his face as he sat the book down and leaned in, eyes shooting to the jacket draped over the back of your chair. "Does your little sherrif know you brought my jacket on your date?" crap, he gave it to you weeks ago after a pack meeting and it was too cold outside you had almost forgotten it was his only the occasional whiff of his cologne reminding you but still hadn't stopped you from practically taking ownership of it, not that he needs to know you were nervous and it brought you comfort, the jacket, not Derek. "It wasn't a date and he's a deputy." you didn't notice your foot tapping under the table or the fact he could literally hear your heartbeat but you didn't want to give in that easily. Derek who was still leaned in sat back in his chair smiling not caring you defended the deputy one bit and nodded his head back at the leather jacket. "You didn't answer the question, is. that. mine?'' his tone slowed as it did in the loft but had a completely different meaning with you. the look in his eye gave you some unexpected confidence. you and Derek have always been close ever since Scott got bitten he never got irritated at you or withheld information and you were normally the middle man because of it. while you both knew you had feelings for each other and could often be found stuck to the other side or cuddling on his couch during a full moon when he was too afraid to leave you alone claiming you were safer there, regardless you had never crossed that line but the feeling tonight had you toeing that line. mimicking his previous position. "Are you refuring to me or the jacket?" You didn’t bother to hide the teasing tone your voice took sinking your teeth into your bottom lip when his eyes flash down to them. You knew you were being blunt but you were tired of waiting for him to make a move which came to a shock to your table companion but wasn’t objecting. Dereks smirk changed to a real smile as he met your eyes and took a breath as if preparing himself to speak the words aloud or preparing for what could be your reaction to them. But with the signs you’d given tonight, he felt more confident than he normally would around you. “The jacket.” He words or lack there off made your shoulders drop in defeat. Maybe Lydia was wrong maybe you were wrong. To far in your head you didn’t notice Derek lean forward in the table again, close enough to feel his breath fanning over your nose and lips. “I already know you’re mine.” Pulling away leaving you in your haze he stood, grabbing the jacket from your chair you thought he was carrying it for you until he took the one he was wearing off and held it open waiting for you to slide your arms through. Not fully understand why until you obliged the cologne and a scent that is solely Derek engulfed you. Laughing under your breath which you knew he heard. “Did you give me this because it smells more like you?” Derek didn’t even look ashamed for being so transparent, slinging his arm over your shoulder and pulling you further into his side. Loving the fact he could smell himself on you knowing that if he could so could every other supernatural in town.      “Have you make sure everyone knows who you belong to"

“OnlyFans takes 20% of whatever creators earn on the platform. The top creators, most of whom are famous women, rake in millions a month. Below them, those in the 0.1%, earn around $100,000 (£80,000) or more every month. The typical creator, though, has 21 subscribers and brings in $151 monthly. A different survey* revealed that, on average, an OnlyFans creator makes about $180 every month. To earn the big bucks, you need to be better than 99% of creators on the platform. An opportunity that the growing number of agencies have begun to recognise, and have come swooping in, proffering the secret to success.”

I could be earning hundreds of pounds a week, apparently. I’ve been spotted, online, for my potential. And, as I wait impatiently for payday, dragging myself through those long days at work where nothing extraordinary happens, it’s tempting. Really tempting. How? I can become one of the OnlyFans 1%. At least, that’s what this agency is telling me. They would manage everything, I’d work less and earn more, and I wouldn’t even need to show my face. Win, win, right? But, as I was about to discover, what these agencies are really doing is less manager, more pimp… They’re selling a lie dressed as ‘the dream’.

One google of OnlyFans and the stories come rolling in. There’s the ‘Florida woman who quit her Chick-fil-A job to become an OnlyFans model and now earns a whopping $14K a week,’ or ‘the mum-of-two who makes £5,000 a month and saved a £60k deposit for a house in just two years.’ All rags-to-riches tales of women who bid adieu to their boring or unfulfilling lives and now make more than burned-out city bankers.

Your parents probably know what OnlyFans is, so extreme is its ubiquity. The UK-based company barrelled into the industry in 2016, offering users the opportunity to monetise their influence and sell exclusive content to their fans. Not all of this content is adult… but it’s largely, now, what the platform is known for. Sex workers, cam girls and adult film stars enjoy the autonomy OnlyFans offers, in an industry where – previously – they had to rely on bigger companies to either cast them, promote them or, in the case of strip clubs, give them a place to work. On OnlyFans, the creator chooses what content they produce and when, working hours that suit on a self-employed basis.

The platform’s popularity peaked during lockdown (something attributed both to traditional venues closing down and more people being pushed into financial hardship). Between 2019 and 2020, the number of registered users rose from 13.5 million to 82.3 million. Now, there are 190 million active users and 2.1 million of those are creators. Between 2020 and 2021, OnlyFans’ revenue increased by 220% – to $4.9bn.

OnlyFans takes 20% of whatever creators earn on the platform. The top creators, most of whom are famous women, rake in millions a month. Below them, those in the 0.1%, earn around $100,000 (£80,000) or more every month. The typical creator, though, has 21 subscribers and brings in $151 monthly. A different survey* revealed that, on average, an OnlyFans creator makes about $180 every month. To earn the big bucks, you need to be better than 99% of creators on the platform. An opportunity that the growing number of agencies have begun to recognise, and have come swooping in, proffering the secret to success.

It was 3am and Pollie† had just finished filming her latest content. She’d been doing what’s known as ‘dick rating’, where fans send her pictures of, well I think you can guess what of, and she delivers them a critique of the picture. But, despite working for hours, she still couldn’t go to bed – she had 30 messages to reply to, from her fans, and each needed special care. She wasn’t in the mood for sexting, but if she slipped up, was snappy or not as ‘fun’ as they thought her to be, then she would lose their support. Bleary-eyed and frazzled, she checked the clock… 5am. She was finally ready to wind down. Her kids would be awake soon and she’d need to do the school run.

Pollie, who’d set up her OnlyFans account in April 2022, was succeeding on the app. She enjoyed it a lot more than her old job in the corporate world, plus it could work around the hours she needed to do since falling sick with an autoimmune disease while pregnant. She was making okay money, but with all the hours she was putting in, it wasn’t worth it. ‘It was extremely lonely,’ the 30-year-old mum says from her home. ‘It had reached the point where I didn’t have the motivation to cook.’ She’d heard that other OnlyFans creators hired people who would do a lot of the accounting and messaging, leaving her with more time to create content. Within a month of starting OnlyFans, she decided that she also needed extra help. She didn’t know then that it would end up costing her a lot more than she ever thought.

Agencies exist to help models manage their productivity, schedule work, help with time management and marketing. In theory, they aren’t any different to an actor, author or influencer hiring a PA or manager. ‘Creators may choose to work with a wide range of third parties, including photographers, videographers, talent managers and agencies, to curate and monetise their content,’ an OnlyFans spokesperson told us, adding that, ‘Any third party that a creator elects to work with does not work on behalf of OnlyFans and is not affiliated with the company in any way.’ There are also plenty of reputable agencies that are a great help to the creators and can take their business to the next level. But then there are the rogue ones. They take many guises, from the ones going after people like me, who don’t have profiles yet, claiming that they can make people hundreds without showing their faces, to those approaching existing OnlyFans creators and promising to elevate their brands and take all the hard work off them.

‘One person doesn’t have enough hours in the day to do OnlyFans and earn good money, unless you’ve got millions of followers on Instagram and are ready to mass DM them,’ says Pollie, who was building her OnlyFans profile and trying to attract a fan base from scratch. ‘If you’re just an average Joe like me, agencies are quite important because they have the strategies and finances to help you out,’ she notes.

The agency told Pollie they would do everything. She logged out of her OnlyFans account so they could post her content and reply to fans. They’d monitor her email inbox and the money made, paying her an allowance each month (40% of the profit, they took 60%) as they took total control of her account. Pollie was new to this, she didn’t know how it usually worked. Plus, they were convincing. Two months passed without them paying her. She was also still doing 90% of the work, as the agency had stopped doing any promotion for her. Pollie, curled up with her cockapoo on her sofa, takes a deep breath as she remembers. ‘I’d spend so many hours just crying, thinking, “What the fuck have I got myself into?”’ Spiralling, she demanded her log-in details. Her blood ran cold. The agency had earned $9,000 from her and had only sent her a meagre cut, not the 40% she thought they agreed. They blamed exchange rates and bank fees. When we spoke to OnlyFans, it confirmed that creator accounts have to be set up by an individual who goes through extensive identification checks before they can upload content, and that all payments are made to creators’ bank accounts, with the name field for all bank accounts uneditable. Pollie claims her agency got around this by setting up a bank account in her name.

I spoke to six OnlyFans creators for this piece, all of whom had experiences with different agencies. However, there were common threads that ran through each of their harrowing stories, with financial abuse looming large. Student Josie†, who started an OnlyFans to help pay her tuition fees, went from earning £1,200 a month to £160 in three months after signing on with an agency that sold her profile to another, without her knowledge. It then locked her out of her account, changing the email and refusing to give her the new password. ‘I was crying all day,’ she recalls. ‘I thought I was going to lose my account.’

Lia†, an ex-OnlyFans model, who also worked as a marketing and talent manager for an agency, describes being in message groups with the agents where they spoke derogatively about the women they managed, including racist remarks. The agents advised each other on control tactics such as blackmailing women who didn’t pay them their cut, by threatening to send all their pictures to family and friends. At one point, one agent said (in messages seen by Cosmopolitan), ‘Sounds like time for a leak of content… revenge porn,’ before a colleague reminded them that they could get into legal trouble for that.

As for the professional marketing strategies and account growth promised? This turned out to be fake followers and likes bought to boost profiles, and ‘the chatters’ (people employed to pretend to be the model, to chat to fans and boost engagement) were mostly friends and family members of the company directors. ‘Only one of them had sales experience,’ says Lia. ‘[The models] were giving away a percentage of their earnings for no reason.’ Meanwhile, agency staff began promising fans in-person meet-ups that, aside from the safety and privacy concerns, is a violation of OnlyFans policy, with their spokesperson telling us that ‘OnlyFans is a site for digital connections, and in-person meetings are strictly against our terms of service. Words such as “meet” are not allowed on the platform and we use AI tools to screen for them. Supported by our AI tools, our team of human moderators review all content uploaded to the platform, including direct messages, and anyone found to be breaching our terms of service faces being banned from the platform.’

Lia screenshotted everything and showed it to a solicitor. They told her she couldn’t take it further because they’d taken themselves off Companies House, a government register of legitimate companies. ‘Every few months, they set up a new business name. They would rack up a lot of debt, and a lot of unhappy clients. But then the clients can’t do anything about it because they’ve now resigned.’

‘No one actually needs a subscription for your pussy…’ I’m chatting on the phone to flame-haired Rebecca Goodwin, who’s an OnlyFans success story. Before joining the platform, she was £15k in debt and feeding her children with food vouchers. Today, she earns between £60,000 and £100,000 a month. But, despite her success, she’s keen for people to know about the hard work that goes into it. ‘People think, “Oh, OnlyFans will save my life.” It’s just not that easy,’ she explains. ‘We’re in a cost-of-living crisis, so you have to put 10 times the amount of work in [to get subscribers].’ You need to be in people’s faces constantly to do well, Goodwin adds.

People message Goodwin all the time asking if they can sell content on OnlyFans without showing their face or having any social media. ‘Less than 10% of it is the actual act of anything explicit. In fact, 90% of the job is constantly being on social media, piquing people’s curiosity so they want to see more,’ she shares. She’s a brand. ‘People remember my name. They know my personality, rather than just someone anonymous on a free porn site. That’s what they pay for.’

Yet, it was exactly this that I was promised. The opportunity to build a fan base without having to show my face, or use my own social media channels. Agents prey on vulnerability. When Goodwin’s page started blowing up five years ago, it all got too much. ‘My anxiety was awful. I thought that having all the money would be an exciting time. But it was just so much more pressure than I could have ever imagined.’ She signed a 12-month contract with an agency, whose advice then led to her losing a bulk of her subscribers and income.

That was a year ago, and the 29-year-old from Chesterfield is in a much better place now. She works without an agency, and puts time aside (8pm to 11pm, six days a week) to answer messages. It’s a lot of work to sext this many people every day, but her fans expect a personal connection. They send pictures of themselves, she sends a video back. She’ll also ask how their day went, and the chat might get deep. Others are witty and playful. It’s very rewarding, she says. Alongside this, she makes three or four movies a month. They are comedic parodies, professionally produced. Her titles include The Little Spermaid, Super Mario Hoes and Lord Of My Ring. Each movie takes two days (seven hours of acting with clothes on, 20 minutes of sex) and costs about £4,000 to make. The bulk of her time is spent promoting the films and her page across social media, which is why her average screen time is 10 hours a day.

On one shoot, she met adult film director Dick Bush. They got on and decided to become business partners. He gets between 15% and 20% of her earnings a month, which amounts to between £15k and £20k. It’s worth every penny to work with one person she trusts rather than an inexperienced team she’s never met, Goodwin says. He helps her with filming and editing, brainstorming ideas for content and finding new work opportunities. He also motivates her for the sex scenes. ‘I’ve got the worst self-confidence in the world. So I have to talk myself into doing sex scenes for days before actually doing it.’

What Goodwin has discovered is her niche. With new creators joining OnlyFans each day, most have to find a way to stand out. The top performers find their USP and perfect it. Astrid Wett is known for also being a boxer. Bonnie Locket uses her knowledge and love of super cars to attract fans. Goodwin is known for her comedic parody fantasy films. ‘Being down to earth and having tits – I soon realised how important it was to stand out from the rest of the competition,’ she notes.

But what if you don’t have a niche? The agencies, it turns out, will find one for you. Pollie, who now has 123k followers on the app, has settled as a ‘curvy football mum’ but she’s also been a nurse, piano teacher, an office worker; whatever an agency (she’s now moved between a few) suggested she try, she did. I was also told by one creator, who preferred not to be named, that she was pressurised into creating content about wanting to sleep with a stepson, something she was opposed to doing as it would make her own stepson feel uncomfortable. But she was bullied into it and eventually gave in. The platform may have been built to put the power back in the hands of sex workers, but it seems the more business has boomed, the more outsiders – often men – have tried to exploit the women at its core.

‘How I made $100k a month in 2023,’ the video proclaims. Only this time, it’s men, not women, being sold a dream on OnlyFans. YouTube is full of hacks on how to earn six figures a month running an agency. Like the Bitcoin-hungry crypto bros before them, the OnlyFans boom provided a chance to cash in. Men see how supposedly easy it is to make money and are lured in to set up their own creator-management agencies. I’ve been told of men telling their partners or friends they could make loads of money if they let them manage their OnlyFans account.

But, as the platform (and cash within it) grows, what can be done to stop this from happening? An OnlyFans spokesperson told us, ‘OnlyFans provides creators with a platform to monetise their content and engage with their fan base. Our relationship is with the content creators and OnlyFans is not affiliated with and does not endorse any third party or agency.’ This stance exists within a wider context of murky UK legislation. OnlyFans itself is legal (with restrictions on certain types of content), as is working with agencies. However, laws for in-person sex work state that working with a third party is illegal. This results in those who feel taken advantage of by their agencies feeling afraid to go to the police, not to mention the long-running mistrust that sex workers have for law enforcement.

Transparency could help break this cycle. The more that creators speak out about exploitation, the more sex workers know what to look out for. But perhaps we also need to break our dated perceptions of what OnlyFans is and how it functions. Society sends the message that when a woman is using her image to make money, then she mustn’t know what she’s doing. That it’s work that doesn’t require a brain, only a body. But, as every creator I spoke to showed, making it on OnlyFans is a business. And today, it’s about being a business owner in a highly saturated market. Like all new companies, you’ll need a strong plan, a USP and the energy and drive to hustle, hard. And like any other business, the dream doesn’t really exist. Overnight success stories are rarely what they seem and, where there’s money, there’s always a host of snake oil salesmen trying to cash in. Third party OnlyFans agencies are no different, but due to the law and a society that shames sex work, forcing it underground, they have the opportunity to exploit and thrive. 

and this is how keaton ruined my plans of him hating daisy lmao

[attractiveness alert!]

Keaton landgraab just stopped what they were thinking about for a moment and found themselves staring at daisy verona. Their beautiful features meet keaton’s desires so readly that it’s almost as if whatever created such a sim sculpted her specifically for Keaton.

[keaton]: daisy... uh... you look... pretty

[daisy]: thank you! you look good as well

[daisy]: are you ready? i think amber is already waiting for us.

[keaton]: yes. i don’t think we should let her wait too much.

Eurovision 2023: #14 & #13

14. ESTONIA Alika - "Bridges" 8th place

Decade ranking: 40/116 [Above Circus Mircus, below TBA]

Tweak some bangs, Alika's Shart.

It is amazing how a few on-point tweaks can make a song significantly more appealing. I went up and down on Alika throughout the months, but a year after I've put her low on the pre-show ranking I am ready to lock in my final verdict: Bridges is kind of really good.

Ofc there were huge problems down the road cuz you know, vocal masturbation ballad in a BorisBubbles ranking, and also, clear jury carry the year after Marius Bear and Nadir Whatshisgjon, but Estonia ironed out their most glaring flaws, so what else can I ask for? I got what I wanted.

Estonia's problem for me, as I've come to realize once I started liking Alika again, was always one of aesthetics, and specifically visual aesthetics (keep that in mind when I rank Europapa low for the lack of bags-over-head (lol if I rank ESC2024 to begin with (I mean, I probably will (I am not readly to enter that discourse yet tho (regardless, that haircut is a capital offence))))). A big inherent flaw of vocal flex ballads like "Bridges" is the lack of dynamism and emotional gravitas (as the vocal technique goes against these principles - "loud" is a pitch, not an emotion) - it's a flaw that comes with the genre and that's something only charisma can fix. Pre-show Alika looked like she'd been dragged out of a river and then SHOUTED into a mic without moving, so yeah, that's where I bail. Slimane your way into someone else's simple and easily-impressed heart please, I Am Not The Demograph. (-- Alesia Michelle).

The version in Liverpool though was - by textbook definition almost - a glow-up. Alongside her Jenevelle hair, Estonia actually put Alika in a beautiful gown and made her move around. Observe:

NOW I SEE MAHSEEL BEELDING UP A WOALD OF BREEECHEEEEEEEEEES

Apparently a lot of people were mesmerized by the self-playing piano but for me the biggest factor in selling "Bridges" was just Alika herself. Props are nice embellishments but the true art of live performance is when score and vocal come together via the power of Personality. Which she finally showed in Liverpool after what felt like an eternity.

By allowing Alika to just do... idk, Alika things with her body lang, face and hands, Estonia broke the monotony of "three minutes of loudness" and made it fun, camp and digestible. If theres anything The Gays (me) like, it's a neat lady doing silly things with fierce confidence. Yasss Go Slay Queen.

Ultimately, a lot of people think Alika's top 10 is nonsense and a strike against juries and here I disagree. That a strong glow up and performance such as Alika's went unappreciated by the televote is a huge strike against the televote, not the other way around. I am happy she got her spot in the limelight, and 8th place is a good, if somewhat generous representation of what she brought. I'll never be a huge fan of the song "Bridges", but at the end of the day Alika really ate that live, and that's something worth rewarding.

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13. POLAND Blanka - "Solo" 19nd place

Decade Ranking: 39/116 [Above Alika, below Stefan]

"ARIANA GRANDE IF ARIANA HAD NO TALENT" -- my immediate instinct when i first heard "Solo"

Were my instincts wrong, though? Her lack of performance skill and talent, the online response, the severed heads of Jann and Iru she keeps mounted on a pedestal in her boudoire. Blanka was the Mery Bass of 2023. She has no business being this good.

btw yes, lmao so hard that THIS ENTRY was somehow one of the more controversial ones in recent ESC. Honestly, the 13th place I'm giving here is at least half thanks to the controversy which made "Solo" feel iconic - it is exceedingly funny to me that it caused so much outrage for... existing? What did Blanka ever do? Certainly not rob better acts - Listen to Jann and listen to Iru and tell me straight-faced they were better.

BEJBA! IS KINDA KRAJZA!

As a song, "Solo" was always fun femmetrash. Ever since Eleni the majority of the Eurovision girlbops have been attempting to recreate Fuegos with varying successes - Competently staged with intricate choreographies to commemorate our inner faggotry. "Solo" represents a style of girlbop that's gone out of fashion - the "Aphrodisiac"-like basic bop by useless bitches for useless cigs. (Fuego is what gays see themselves as, Solo is what they actually are). Aphrodisiacs have become nearly extinct at Eurovision because they nearly always lose the NF nowadays. So thank you Jann for performing 'Gladiator' in Scooby-Doo vocals so that we could witness Bejba fullfill her beautiful destiny in Liverpool.

And what a destiny it was. In a way, most of the things I wrote about Alika also apply to Blanka. A few small tweaks to the performance can make the whole a lot better. Unlike Alika though, who ampted up the sophistication, Blanka went a route I respect more: She listened to fan feedback.

Slight paraphrasing:

Fans: "EWW BLANKA HAS NO TALENT, CAN'T DANCE, CAN'T SING, WON BASED ON MONEY!!!" Blanka: "... so? 🙂"

I don't know WHEN Blanka decided to be everything the fans accused her of (talentless, washed-up, plastic), amped up to comical levels, but thank fuck she did because it made her instantly epic. It is rare for a Eurovision artist to address her online haters by Now I Betta Troll'em, Troll'em, and Blanka as it turns out is masterfully skilled at trollery. She elevated it into an art.

The Cheap VFX <3

The badly performed wooden choreos <3

The Dutch angles <3

Doing the Eleftheria thing of having your backing vocalist sing over you, while you mug the camera with semi-fierce faces and placeholder hairflips.

Accused to having no performance skill or talent? Add in a cheap dance break anyway, and enjoy every second of it, live your dream while they fume on Twitter, angry that Poland qualified over Georgia.

Guess where I am, honey? 💋 I'm in the final. 💋 And I'm here to stay 💋 :dramatic cymball:

"Solo" was incompetent, plastic and a huge mess, and that was great because it was all deliberate. That made it epic. Poland really took all the negative criticism they received and yanked it up to 11 and it made the entry better. If that isn't a taunting flex in the face of toxicity, I don't know what is. Given how venomous the fandom has been since the pandemic, that is an approach to life I can totally get behind.

THE RANKING

AND WITH THAT WE MADE IT OUT OF THE MILD LIKE ZONE, HOO-fucking-RAY. Now bear in mind that the next few eliminees are very LOW lush greens and there's quite a few of those before we get to the really good stuff, but eh. Soon I'll be able to talk about the songs I loved, and that's always a treat.

Whenever I get home from a tour or film shoot, the first thing I do is run into the garden. I feel this incredibly strong – almost empathic – connection to my plants. I only hope they’re still alive.

Johnny Flynn on Coutry Living UK Magazine, May 2024. Available on Readly. (x) Photograph by JOHNNY SAVAGE/EYEVINE/GUARDIAN.

On the "Luke as Annabeth's loser brother" multiverse...

While Annabeth is the architecture nerd,Luke is just as passionate about literature and language. Not only that,but despite his friendly,welcoming personality,Luke gets into heated arguments over interpretations of works on a regular basis and even had fistfights over some obscure texts very few people care about.

However,those facets of Luke aren't readly visible. He's handsome,charismatic,approachable and a high-level athlete(for his own good,I imagine it being an individual sport).

had the simple burger the other day and it was soo good I think I'm readly for the complex burger

Our complex burgers are too strong for you traveler

Daisy Ridley interview with Readly 💙💙

hi bestie!! first of all i heard abt your mom and i just wanna say i hope ur doing okay and that i’m so sorry for your loss. take as much time as you need to recover and don’t worry abt us!

second, i just wanted to ask if we’d be able to see ricky and ej as friends again in one of your aus? you wrote them so perfectly in the marching band au!

anyways lots of love to you and your family, love 🤍

Thanks so much for this! I appreciate it.

I'll be honest, S3 amped up my Ricky Bowen slander, for sure. ;-)

That said, I got a concept in my ask box that I'm not readly to share yet that would fit into this paradigm, so I'm going to go with...

We'll see, I'm working on it!

If we’re still do bio asks, are borrowers more social and live in large groups, or more solitary and live alone/in small family groups?

Borrowers are extremely social, their entire culture is based and centered around helping each others, so much that strangers will readly and gladly home each others, lend help, raise children together, etc etc (in fact, a little snippet of Nick's childhood Is when he was attacked by a territorial sparrow, and a traveler instantly jumped in to chase it away and sticked with Nick until his parents caught up, and the neighbors of Nick's family often looked after him and his sisters when their parents had to scavange around, and just as much they helped them back).

More often, they tend to stick to one family, but if they get the chance, they'll grow up in huuge communities, it's a lot easier to brave the world when there's lots of you and you're sticking together. Sometimes however borrowers are forced to live alone, usually because of forces greater than them (as it is for Nick) but sometimes people also just. Prefer It that way.

@staff get readly