MARSEILLE II PATHCODES VOL. II

ACT II. “You can’t compete where you don’t compare” Length - 7, 452 Mood - slighted, spoiled Pairing - Suho x Reader, some Baekhyun x Lyon Reader Warning - Mature for sexual references 

“어떤 단어들도 우릴 표현 못 하지 내가 아는 우주도 우리를 축복해 (Oh) 우리 안의 Circle를 만들어 매일매일 그렇게 돌다가 물들어 (너와 내가 너와 내가) (너와 내가 너와 내가)” “Eyes Locked, Hands Locked” by Red Velvet

You watched her in silence as she watched him. You had never seen such an untrammeled glare in _____ (Lyon Reader)’s eyes, and found yourself uneasy about her slow careless unraveling even in front of you. Following your arrival from Berlin, after the successful unveiling of the Pathcodes’ The First Supper New Year Gala, a demonstration of the culmination of an entire season of painstakingly detailed planning, you had originally arranged to return together with her and Baekhyun to your place from the airport before they doubled back to pick up Yun Hee from her gra-mère where she had spent a short period of her winter holiday. But the very notion of having to continue to watch the way that she fused her lips closed to withhold the feral screams her eyes could not contain, was unbearable. You knew that she was irritated with Baekhyun for what she would and had described as his lack of assertiveness, for his almost pathetically people pleasing nature that failed to come to complete fruition. You knew since you were young how volatile her anger could surmount to, and in contrast, you knew, that as their relationship evolved, how much she had forgiven and had therefore bloomed as a person capable of loving even herself after failing to meet her own expectations. She had let go of so much hatred, even for those you would say that she would have every reason to despise and dissociate with forever, and you knew that it was Baekhyun that taught her how to look within the pain to find opportunities to love. It was he, grant it also among others, that had given her reasons to hope for a second chance in life. But woe to him, you thought as you suddenly spoke up. Woe to you, Baekhyun who had inspired that very same wrath however loving and well meaning he had intended to be, you thought solemnly as you announced, “actually I’ll take a cab.” You watched Baekhyun hesitate. His back was to you as he meant to lead the way; he fumbled with their suitcases as he approached the white paint of the sidewalk crossing path leading the long trail from the airport to the car port. You looked away before he looked back and up at you, but you heard his uncertain gulp before she spoke. 

“Oh? It’s no trouble to bring you home and come back quickly for YunHee. Maman knows our plan. It’s no trouble, I promise,” she even smiled at you as she always did, her eyes no longer clouded with unforgiving, agitated even darkened clouds. You shook your head, turning back to hail one of the taxis that waited for a willing traveler. The man started up at your signal, barreling down from behind the slowly loading tourist bus, and reuniting families and the security detail directing the haphazard afternoon traffic. You shrugged, pretending to yawn, you hoped convincingly enough. “It’s a long drive and it would be unfair to make you drive that far. I’ll see you. Kiss my niece hello and goodnight for me?” You said to her as you moved towards the taxi where the man had already popped open his trunk in anticipation for your suitcase. He wiped his hands clean against his jeans before reaching for it. You took your time, turning yourself completely away, stowing your coat on the seat, before looking back up at them. Baekhyun couldn’t hide his look of growing apprehension as he watched you go. Usually he would bound towards you and hug you goodbye with that carefree puppy eyed grin, but he now braved a timid smile and waved from his safe post behind the suitcases, “see you soon ____. Be safe getting home please.” “I’ll see you later then,” you nodded at him accepting his wary stance and then you looked at her. She smiled, again for you though it still didn’t cool the heat in her eyes, leaning forward to kiss you goodbye. You caught her quickly, pressing an incisive “take it easy,” into her cheek which you felt her stiffen against. Take it easy on him. —————————- Home in your apartment at last, you waited for Junmyeon. You had washed all of your travel clothes, cleaned and put up your suitcase, changed your sheets, scrubbed your floors, checked the mail, and cleared out the trash, shampooed your hair, and fixed dinner. “He should be here any minute,” you chewed at your bottom lip, looking up again at the time on the clock that read well past the 7:30PM dinner date you had set, above your oven where two servings of deliciously prepared coq a vin waited to be enjoyed. You had hoped to still be cleaning while Junmyeon arrived from Elixier, where you had just called him to check in after settling back in with the groceries. “Everything is running smoothly here so I may get there earlier after I meet with Dad-” “I could always just go to your place tonight. That’s easier isn’t it? It’s not as far as you would have to drive to get here. Plus! You needed groceries-” “I’ve already requested groceries for next weekend when we’ll stay at my place, ____. But I appreciate that,” you heard a sincere smile in his voice, and a slight chuckle at the idea of you going overboard to spoil him, as if that were unusual between you two. “Ok, but definitely 7:30 right? We can push it back if-” “I’ll be there sweetheart. At 7:30,” he stated in a deliberately thoughtful tone which you knew to mean that he couldn’t wait to see you. But it’s 8:30 now… Don’t cancel don’t cancel don’t cancel not again don’t- His name flashed across your screen underneath a time that read 8:45PM as your phone buzzed, and beeped within the clasp of your palms. “Jun?” “_______, sweetheart. How is dinner coming?” He intoned honeyly. “You’re not coming are you?” You frowned impulsively. “Sweetheart I-“ “Can I at least bring you the dinner I made? I got everything ready for us. You promised me when we got back we could-” “I’m sorry. I am. I…things are difficult with Dad. I…I want to see you. I do. I’m sorry. I can’t get away right now. The board is here and we’re discussing damage control after my brother’s blunder. They need me for this evening-” Your emphatic I need you too died on your lips. You pressed your tongue against the roof of your mouth to release the clenching of your teeth. “How is everything going? Will you be able to rectify the damage he caused? Surely we could make up for what was lost with investments from-” “I don’t know if I should risk that. Minseok advised against it…I can’t compromise us all…” he began to drift away though you could clearly still hear him pacing in the hall outside of where the meeting must have been taking place in Junmyeon’s father’s private hospital room. He had been transferred to a private facility given the green light from his initial medical treatment team following your visit prior to your departure to Berlin for the New Year’s Gala. Junmyeon left the night before you all were scheduled to return back to your home bases to check in with his father and Elixier, and promised you that once he saw to his affairs, that you two would have more time just to be together. Successive no phone, no internet weekends for two beginning at your place. You had dreamed of the hours you would spend together this weekend and pushed all fantasies outside of primarily face to face cuddling off of the possible agenda. Once the taxi dropped you off, you had purposefully headed back into town. You had fully stocked your refrigerator, cleaned every inch of your place, and stopped into a boutique for a walk-in bikini sugaring because luckily you could call in a favor after regular hours. All of that for a “can’t tonight, sorry?” You remembered again the palpable rage within her (Lyon Reader) eyes and wondered again how long you would struggle to maintain your calm with this chafing rejection. The reason for these purposefully planned upcoming weekends was because the year before had been dedicated to your new mutual endeavors, The Pathcodes. An entire year and some you both had spent working through every detail of every venture that culminated in the last and first evening of the business calendar year. “Will you be back this weekend at all?” Your voice was barely above a discernible whisper but he “mhm’d” in reply almost out of instinct. “I’ll be back on Sunday at the latest, sweetheart,” that word was starting to make your palms itch and tremble. So many “I wish I could-” “I want you” “please come home” “why are you doing this?!” swallowed screams pressed and bruised against your rib cage forcing a weighted exhale past your lips into the receiver. “I know it’s not ideal ____ but please be patient with me,” he had the audacity to sound…was he really annoyed at you? Really?! “….but I have been…and I am being patient,” you felt your brow furrow as you scratched your bare toe folded underneath you with a free hand, taking your time to enunciate every word and pause. “I can’t-” “No. Stop. It’s not I can’t. It’s I will not. I choose not to. It’s a choice Jun. Everything we do is a choice. I chose to come home and prepare for my boyfriend and I to have a weekend together. Because we had an agreement and I chose to honor that. You chose to take care of family business. You are telling me that now you will not honor our agreement instead of coming to a compromise with me for tonight since we planned to take the weekends off together. I understand the circumstance but I am obviously pretty fucking frustrated with you. You have to allow me that-” “Allow it? I told you that I can be there on Sunday at the latest, if you were listening. I am saying that tonight is not something that I am able to compromise. Listen I don’t want to fight _____,” “You’re not even home for us to properly fight and makeup, first of all. That’s the real problem. I know that this is a difficult time. I saw what was happening before we left or don’t you remember that I was with you at the hospital? I know your family doesn’t necessarily want me around. I know that that is awkward for you and for us. But what concerns me now is if you even want me around? Do you even want to be with me anymore Jun? We have gone months without truly spending time together unless for Elixier, or the Pathcodes. Am I not worth your time? Why do I feel like I’m fighting to stay in something that you have already left?” You would not apologize for the way you rushed through your statements. You would not apologize for the way his breath hitched in his chest, signaling his growing irritation with your brazen accusations. I want you to come home and yell at me and scream at me. I want to fight. I want to fight for us. I want us to cry and pick each other up and love each other down all night, all day, all weekend. You remembered the slight fear in Baekhyun’s eyes as he watched you go but you noticed too the resolve in his shoulders as if he had decided, “well let’s get on with it.” Here now on the phone with you Junmyeon cursed. “Damn it ______! I know and I am sorry. I am. I can’t fix this situation going on here and be with you at home tonight. I am choosing to fix this first so I can come home and be at home with you. I promised you my undivided attention. I have not forgotten that promise. But I have to be here now. I have a duty to fulfill. That is irrefutable. On Sunday I will be there. I promise you. Please. I don’t want to fight. Just please tell me that you will wait for me until then, ok? Let’s talk more on Sunday, ok?” He waited for you to acknowledge him and you waited out his patience. “______,” he groaned in a tone that made you think that he knew that you were stalling him if just to hear his voice. Didn’t he feel guilty? “I love you,” you whispered and he sighed, his voice softening as he responded in mutual passionate exasperation, “I love you too.” __________ You still ate your helping of coq a vin, and dipped into a pint of chocolate and cherry glacé unabashedly, hiccuping and nodding off on your sofa. You jolted from an awkward nap dream wherein Junmyeon’s mother asked you to choose between Jun and his brother, and nearly clotheslined the emptied glacé carton, ceramic dinner plate and utensils, wine bottle and glass of white wine you had begrudgingly indulged from your coffee table. Rubbing sleep from your swollen eyes and now dry cheeks, you slowly cleared your dishes and trash, washing them and placing them in their cupboards and the bin neatly. Your slippered footsteps echoed almost mockingly in your flat as though you were realizing how truly empty it was now that you had slowed from running around and around during the weeks that had been being employed as a full time investigative journalist some years ago now. How much had you given away thinking you had gained something priceless? Were you making room for love or was it emptying you? 11:25pm huh? I can’t even drink myself into the next morning anymore? You trudged towards your bedroom, shedding your clothes as you brushed past the door and moved along toward your bathroom. Without looking at the mirror you pulled your brush through the flattened curls you’d shaped of your hair, and wiped the rouge from your lips and cheeks. You ached for him more so than being angry, and that fact alone frustrated you. Why am I so willfully compliant? Why do I wait for him? I know what it is to be abandoned. Forgotten. Unwanted. Why am I waiting? Why? How can I possibly want him right now? How? How could I possibly WANT him right now? Sitting at the edge of your clawfoot tub, you turned both of the faucets until a tolerable mixture of heat and cool water filled the bath. You gently descended, feeling a rush of relief envelope you once you were submerged. And then you started crying again. You hadn’t known your parents. You remembered fragments of your mother’s voice and your father’s face. You thought you had once had siblings. Sometimes the smell of fire and seared flesh was coupled with the sound of her voice. But you were also sure that children made up stories to comfort themselves, and people in general did so because it was easier to live believing a lie. You remembered your mère, the only woman whom you had called mère, visiting you at some place you could never remember being a distinctive orphanage or otherwise. It seemed like you just came to be with her and she just took care of you. Well minded you more so in that she provided a home, an education, nutritious diet, and a wholesome environment for you. But you never had holidays together or with relatives. You didn’t know anyone with your last name or could ever trace a lineage. “What trifling, foolish thoughts. This is some American design on education? I will have a word with the directeur about this sham of a project,” she spat at your family tree project in primary school. You had come home so excited to interview her with the questionnaire your teacher had drawn up. You couldn’t wait to meet her at the school gate, and bounced excitedly all along the street as you walked home risking her chiding for your wild behavior. You showed her the papers as soon as you had finished with your dinner, prattling on about how you hoped she could show you now that you had washed your dishes. You had been so hoping for family photos to be revealed and long lost stories of your mysterious ancestors. No sooner had she spoken with said director though were you removed to a private academy wherein you met your dearest and fondest lifetime friend. Somehow the topic of the project found its way into your first conversation at lunch during your first week, and you shyly revealed to your classmates that you were adopted. Most of the children around you shrugged, though some did eye you in a pitying oh-my-what-a-sad-sorry-thing-that-you-don’t-know-your-family way. She (Lyon Reader) watched you after you said it and slid her chair closer to yours sharing her extra juice box since you drank yours for snack earlier. “I hope you feel welcome here. It’s hard when you feel alone,” she smiled, her chubbiest pearliest smile just for you, and you knew then that family can also be those you meet in life. Family. A concept so elusive but essential to your being was understood differently by you and Junmyeon. You cherished your dearest ___ (Lyon Reader.) Your love for her as pure as a sister and as deep as if the blood within your veins had always been one in the same. And Junmyeon reflected that in his relationships with his dearest friends as you had witnessed. His family, his blood family, however was something unknown and apart from him altogether but unlike you in every way. He felt that he owed them his life no matter the insult or sneers he endured. Your mère, your only legal representation of family, did not deserve your life, in your opinion however. You granted her respect, because you knew that without her you may have never survived wherever it was that she had found you. You had never achieved finding any record of your birth or that place you could hardly remember. On a dare and in search of the truth with ___ (Lyon Reader) one summer vacation, you went to the library to research the whereabouts of your origin. “It’s for your ultimate happiness!” She had declared, with a bravado that insinuated that she would brave the very bowels of the world, and pull apart every floorboard of secrecy to unearth the home you never knew you lost. But even that research meant nothing to you, looking back at it now. Not when you considered what you gained. Junmyeon however could not resist his desire to know more of what his father had suddenly revealed. To hell with what would come of such knowledge. He wanted to know why his uncle would willingly give up a son. What harm could an illegitimate child do? Why did his father have to marry the mother of his nephew who was also his mother? What could such a marriage achieve? He wanted to know more about his family history, and more about their business. He wanted to map it out in front of him to see what had been hidden in such a deceptively innocent manner so uncharacteristic to him of his family. While he had been brought up under the guise that he would always come second to his brother’s future, the very fact of this methodically perpetuated deception had robbed him of his relationship not only with his mother, and his brother but his father. You could see him wondering as he made love to you, driving himself deeper and ever deeper into you until you cried out in anguished ecstasy, the evening you first returned from the hospital somehow surviving a car ride after that bombshell of news, “who am I? What am I doing here?” At the thought of him touching you, and kissing you again, you blushed, your hands happening to slip over your breasts with your soaped up cloth once again. You purposefully ran the cloth over and under, cupping and smoothing your skin smothered in lathered bubbly soap, until the budding of inspired sensation began to spread across every nerve within your body. “Mmmph,” you thought of the way he looked at you with his reddened cheeks, and the sweat between the brows above his darkly impassioned eyes as his mouth closed around your bare nipples. “Haa…” you exhaled writhing as the water slipped between your thighs, gliding over your softening, warming, tenderest places. You remembered his touch there, always gentle at first before gradually building in its intensity. You heard his gasps at your moans as you slipped your fingers along the current of the water, finding the most precious point. “Junmyeon…” you moaned into the quiet bath, hearing the lapping of water echoing its slippery reply. Quickening your pace, you felt the water rising with each breath, pushing you and pulling against you as he did when he, when you, until finally you cried out wishing he was again kissing your lips, your closed eyes, your neck whispering drowsily as he pressed his lips against you that, “I love you. I love you ____.” _______________ You woke again to the incessant buzzing of your cell phone on your coffee table. You turned over after the second call and a glance at your bedside clock that read 2:15am. Ughhhhhh!!!!!! Gathering your blankets around you as a gown since you hadn’t worn anything from the bath to your bedroom, you journeyed back to the living area where your phone buzzed again. “Is that-” You hurried to answer. “Baekhyun?” A horrible pause. “Baekhyun-” “_____, I’m sorry about the hour that I’m calling. Is she there with you?” You realized he had covered the receiver with his hand as you heard him talking to someone while he waited for your answer. “No. No she’s not here. Is something…she didn’t call me,” you hesitated to ask when you knew that something was obviously wrong if he couldn’t find her. I should have stayed with them. I shouldn’t have told her to take it easy. I should have- “She’s not at her flat. She’s not at maman’s. She’s not at the office. I am about to call the police. She won’t answer my calls. She won’t answer maman either. I just…” You could tell he was waiting until he had walked far enough away from the confused voice he had been talking to. “We had a fight again, and she stormed out. She didn’t even take the car. She just went. I made a mistake. I…I can’t find her _____. I-” you could hear the tears returning that had abated, his breathing ragged. You heard him trying to open the car door and fumbling with the handle, hearing the resounding kiss of the metal of the dropped keys against the pavement. “I’m sure she’s ok. Let me call her ok? Don’t go anywhere,” you said quickly transferring to your home phone. She picked up on the third ring. “I’m almost outside your door. Can you open it please?” She asked, her voice sounding eerily calm. “He’s calling to ask where you are. I’m going to tell him that I found you,” you informed her though you knew that she knew you were not asking her permission. “Baekhyun she’s here. She just came to my place-” “How did she get there?! Is she ok? Is she-? I-” “Let me look first ok?” You interrupted jolting from your sofa to scurry to the front door. You heard footsteps outside after a car door slammed and looked down to see a taxi slowly pulling away from your street. Her clothes looked wet no doubt from the misty midnight air, and her rumpled hair was pulled into a sloppy makeshift bun. Her expression was again composed, and resolute though her eyes wandered everywhere as she made her way to your staircase. “She looks ok. Maybe a little tired. Is YunHee-” “She’s home with me. Rather the nanny and maman. I’ll get back then…I…could you tell her that I’m sorry. I am so sorry. And I-” “I will. I promise you,” you whispered to him as you opened the door. __________ After a bath and the last helping of coq a vin you had saved for Junmyeon she was ready to talk. You told her when she had come inside what Baekhyun’s message was and tried to ignore the way she glared at the floor as if she wanted to set it ablaze. You waited for her to begin as she picked nonchalantly at her nails and slowly grew irritated at her callous exhales. “What in the world could be so awful that you would hitchhike it to my house in the middle of the damn night ____(Lyon Reader)?” you began abruptly. She shook her head as she ran a hand over her face, her features pinched. “I can leave-” “And just where would you go? What? Do you expect me to wait up for you to come back? I’m not Baekhyun damn you,” you frowned at her and then she glared at you. “Yea I said it. So come on then. What happened?!” You demanded, tossing your phone to the middle of your bed between you and her. She looked down at the blank screen, and for a moment said nothing before dissolving into soundless sobs. You waited another beat, before sighing yourself as you climbed closer to her to comfort her. You started just by rubbing her shoulders, and listened until she settled down before you tried again in a lower tone. “What happened?” “I thought after the New Years gala we would talk. Before the gala there were always excuses but afterwards since I knew ____ (Berlin Reader) hadn’t scheduled anything for us to attend to and so I planned to talk with him-” “Mhm I could see that at the airport after we got back-” “No…after we got back…___ I am really tired of the level of invasive this thing is becoming,” She suddenly fumed, the dimming fire returning to her speech, her lip curling at the invisible culprit who had reappeared. You pulled away to look at her. “Invasive…?” Oh. “Who said-” “Minseok. Minseok had the nerve to say that I was being unfair and I should know better than to think Baekhyun was not doing all he could for us. He wanted me to mind my attitude…where does Baekhyun get off airing our business to someone like him.” Many a time had the two of you argued over something diminutive in comparison but you knew from circumstance that she was not one to stay angry for long. But with Baekhyun it was different. Involving someone who was not considered family to her, was different. The clarity of that jilted you somewhat. “Did you tell Baekhyun, first of all?” you asked and she tsked at you, her eyes scarily reducing to venomous slits as if to say “obviously.” “He had the nerve to defend him-” “He defended him?!” “He said he didn’t mean it that way…” You rolled your eyes in mutual agitation. “We were doing fine, just fine before all of this. And now…I’m just so frustrated with Baekhyun and this lack of assertiveness. I just…” “What’s the matter though? Really? Haven’t you talked about this with him?” “I thought we had…I don’t know ____ he just got so comfortable,” she frowned at the word as if it was sitting in front of her shrugging away her judgement. “But when you’re happy in a relationship-” “Of course there’s comfortable as in a certain level of intimacy and understanding of each other but ___ he just…he changed…even after YunHee was born and I just…” She seemed to be battling herself to not say what she was afraid to think. “Can’t you make room for the way he is changing? Does he not still take care of you both? Knowing Baekhyun I know he isn’t going to step out on you. He has never had eyes for anyone since he met you. He would never compromise your relationship and willingly hurt you. He is faithful to you, ___ (Lyon Reader.)” “But why do I feel like I am settling for less than who he is? Why does it feel like he’s different but not because he’s becoming a better man but simply because he…I don’t know. It’s just…he bought the house we talked about but the way Minseok paraded around in it…I just…” She grimaced as she wiped away at stray tears. There are holes in our hearts that our families have made. Places we desperately want filled with the love that was promised. And it’s those places we oftentimes force our relationships to go without realizing that that person is doing their best, and loving us with their all. Well…mostly…sometimes. Sometimes we don’t want to recognize the mirror that our lover is. What shortcomings we see in others that we cannot care are often our own grievous downfalls. Where we fail to accept our lovers, we often fail to embrace ourselves. “I just…I miss us ____. When he makes love to me now I…the last time we were together I came like always and he seemed satisfied with that. But when he drifted to sleep I kept touching myself, I wanted more and I have never done that before ____. Never. I look at him at the breakfast table smiling at me over something I made for him and I am mad. I watch him playing with YunHee and I am frustrated at the time he takes showing her how to play the piano. The way he holds her hands and presses her fingers down on the keys. I don’t know what’s wrong with me-” her voice stuttered to a stop as she started to cry again, a pitiful rasping moan. The mention of lovemaking made you groan inwardly, but you heard an echo of what she had once said as a girl. That she wished her father had loved her and she was honestly jealous of girls who knew their father’s love. The research you conducted led her not only to your non existent family but to her own father; information she obsessed over for months before finally calling him to demand a meeting. To you she was not unhappy because Baekhyun loved their daughter, it was because she once again felt like something lacked in her even though everything had gone the way she had hoped…for the most part. She had not found the peace she wanted. Whereas you… “_____ you love this man. You absolutely do. There is no denying that. But instead of telling him what you thought-” “Why can’t he just-” “I don’t know why. But he tries does he not? Even now he called for you. He was at your apartment, he had just stopped by your office, he was even brave enough to go to maman to look for you and you know that must have been terrifying, and I have no doubt that he was about to get in the car to come here after calling the police if I did not answer my phone. He is not a superhuman. He has his flaws. But he loves you without question. Everything you had ever hoped and dreamed for in a father when we were little, our precious YunHee has in Baekhyun. Is that not a blessing-” She nodded but shook her head, again wiping away tears. “How is it any different if we are not married?” “Then stop delaying the ceremony and get on with it!” You cried and she laughed at your sudden shout making you smile at least. “I want some time away from him even so. I want to think about this. It doesn’t feel right. It doesn’t feel the same,” she went on and you laughed weakly, unable to hold back your emotions as you had hoped to spare her the time she needed to come down from crisis. “____? Darling what’s wrong?” Her tears forgotten she embraced you instead, cradling you where you turned into her embrace. “I’m sorry I…” “Is it Junmyeon? Has he still not come by?” She sounded truly worried and you knew that she was. She pressed your hair away from your face, gently combing your hair back with her fingers before she began to scratch your scalp. You cuddled into her, sighing, “I don’t know when he’ll have the time.” “What the hell does that even mean? Surely he has time to see you,” she intoned irritable on your behalf. You sat up to look at her, “I’m not sure that he loves me or that he would stick beside me if his family demanded different. I think given the ultimatum that he would leave me.” She shook her head at you, her eyes tearful as she heard your confession. “What really holds us together?” You mused aloud ruefully to which your dear friend (Lyon Reader) countered, “even before YunHee was born Baekhyun and I were committed. It’s not just a child that binds two people together. I mean look at my mom and Dad you know…?” She meant to comfort and rule out your fears but you said the truth on your heart anyway. “I worry that I have just now only realized that whether there was a child or not…Junmyeon and I…I’m not sure we are built of the stuff to last.” ______________ Saturday was spent in, serenely. __ (Lyon Reader) cooked each meal for you both and called home to speak with YunHee who was quite confused and upset that Mommy was not home to hear her piano practice as translated by her nanny. “Baekhyun will be taking her to his grandmother’s this week, and will stay until next weekend. He plans to be away on business the following week as well,” you overheard the nanny inform ___ (Lyon Reader) who was slowly pouring the tea she had brewed for you both. “Oh? Is Baekhyun there-” “He is not at home at the moment, but he will be returning shortly from a visit with his father,” the woman explained to which ___ (Lyon Reader) only nodded. “Thank you for passing along the information. I’ll be home tomorrow morning-” “Wonderful. Mr. Byun was hoping you would be home by then so that he could travel with the whole family together-” “Absolutely. I will be there…” she answered before hanging up the phone. “Make the most of what you have while you have it,” you reminded her as soon as she returned with the tray. ___________ She went early Sunday morning, leaving with sunshine and birdsong in her wake in a mood of both restlessness, and slight regret. “I do love him. I don’t want you to have the wrong idea…” Yea I know. “But you sound like you have cold feet still. Take your time to think it through but remember what’s at stake while your relationship with Baekhyun is uncertain…don’t neglect YunHee…everything you do affects her,” you murmured into her neck as you hugged her goodbye. “Mm,” she took a step back from your hug, holding your hands in hers as she looked at you. You both stood, quietly observing one another. She leaned in for other hug, wrapping her arms around your waist to hold you closer now. “Let’s both not give up, ok?” But I don’t really feel like that’s up to me. _____________ Back inside your apartment you hesitated to close the door on the morning light. The breeze outside smelled so good. The bright sky blue promise of a new day tempted you. Your yearning for truth pulled at the hem of your robe. The sweet smelling breeze lifted your hair, and caressed your cheeks. Run. But you closed the door after a gaping breath. I did promise her that I would try. _____________ “Delivery,” called a male voice after three short knocks on your front door. You had curled into your covers with a couple books Junmyeon left on the bedside table on his side during his last weekend stay with you. The Poetry of Zen, Mouthful Of Birds, The Price of Everything, Don Quixote, and Thinking Fast and Slow were all titles he loved to read over and over while he waited for you to finish with dinner. You smiled as you touched and turned each page, catching whiffs of his cologne impressed into the spine where he’d crushed the open book against him during a nap. “Coming!” You called back, rising from your bed and pulling your silken robe closed. You peeked through the curtains out the window just beside the door to see a couple of delivery men in simple black dinner suits standing in a line, holding velvet boxes embossed with bouquets of flowers. Your heart lifted at the sight. He is coming! You pulled open the door immediately. “Good afternoon, we have flowers for a Miss ____” “Yes. Yes that’s me,” you breathed in the fragrant scent of cherry blossom bouquets as they entered with boxes sized to hold small table and larger floor arrangements. You watched as they worked, expertly placing the bouquets in vases of clear crystal where they saw spaces fit for the glowing bouquets. The soft rosy pink and white of the buds cast a glowing blush within your seemingly barren apartment. Had the very light of my place been drained from here before now? How had I not noticed? As you stood mesmerized by the resurgence of life around you, you startled at the delivery man who approached you with a small white box lavishly wrapped in billowing red satin ribbon that loosely spiraled from the bow at its top to the floor at his feet. “If you would, Miss,” he gestured you closer, inclining his chin to the box held neatly atop the palms of his gloved white hands. You started forward reaching to touch the lush ribbon and gently pull the delicate bow loose from its arrangement. It spooled out from its hold cleanly and you lifted the lid of the box to see a blinking analog message. “I’m sorry ____. I hope you can forgive me.” Tearfully you looked up at the doorway where he appeared, a halo of the afternoon’s dimming rays framing him as he stood there. “Hi sweetheart,” he grinned, optimistically. _____________ “I want us to really talk about this Junmyeon,” you murmured against his bare chest, feeling happily woozy at the fragrance in the air, and the loved feeling in your limbs. “Then let’s talk now that we’re both awake…” he murmured against your nose, shifting carefully so he could pull you closer. You nipped at his chin as he wrapped his arm more securely around your back, your hand on his chest. Tonight was the first time you had loved openly in your living room. As soon as the delivery men exited your apartment, and he had discreetly closed the door, he referenced that saying before you could open your mouth, “I know it’s been stormy between us and around us lately…but they do say that April showers bring May flowers. And so I’ve brought you all the flowers I have in my heart for you for every time I thought of you, of us, and our love.” You broke into a sprint towards him, colliding with him though he had very obviously braced himself to catch you. “Why do you do this to me? I wait for you for days on end. You just abandoned me. You just desert me now when everything is uncertain? I want to be there with you! Why don’t you consider me as part of your family the way I think of you? Why did you come back here if you acted like you didn’t need me before? What do you take me for-” You whimpered into his sudden kiss, struggling to pull away from him. “I’m not abandoning you-” “Then what?! You meant to tell me I am making this all up?!” “You’re not-” “Then say it, damn it! Make up your mind! You can’t possibly expect me to let this pass just because you brought the garden of Eden to my apartment!” “____” he reached for your face, cupping your cheeks in his hands, willing you to still your trembling limbs as he pressed his forehead against yours. You treasured the scent of aftershave at his neck, and mint on his breath. You had happily noted his duffel bag at his feet, and that he wore your favorite sweatshirt. “I don’t know what to think. My entire world isn’t what I thought and right in the middle of that is us. I don’t know what to say. I love you. I know that. But some part of me is still confused about myself-” “But why not just say that? Why do you shut me out?” “Because you can’t help me. It has nothing to do with you. It has nothing to do with us-” “But it does. This…you being confused about who you are means that you are confused about our relationship. Where can I possibly hope to fit into that? How can I possibly comfort you when you don’t even know what you need? Junmyeon…” He dropped his hands to your shoulders, gliding his open palms against you, like water, the tide pulling you ever closer, this time, to his chest where he embraced you deeply. “I can’t ask you to wait for me but I am asking you to wait for me and to be patient with me-” “No,” you pushed against his chest. He mouthed your “no,” back at you as if it was an impossible answer. “No I will not wait anymore Junmyeon…I can’t,” you broke into a sob that sent tremors down your spine. His hopeful gaze splintered at your statement. “I want you. I’m sure of that. I want us. But I don’t want this waiting. I want to really get to know who you are. I want you to get to know me too. I want to grow together. I’m not saying that I need to be there for all of the board meetings or the trade deals though I do want to hear about that too. I know there are things that you have to do. I know there are places that I cannot go. But I’m saying that I want a home together. I want you here every night. I want you to come home to me. Whatever happens to you, happens to me. I accept that fate. I want to get to know this person you are discovering that you truly are. You are mine…and I…I am yours, Junmyeon…” can’t you see that? Can’t you see what a mess this has made of me? How could you sweep into my life like that and then just flutter away? He waited for you to finish, his hands fisted by his sides, his brown eyes dark with tears. He waited another moment longer while you wrapped your arms around yourself, despairing. He took a shaky step towards you and another before kneeling at your feet. “I…I don’t know everything about who I am. Or my family. And I’m scared of what I’ll find…but if you would have me ____. If you would stand by me that would mean everything to me…but I know I don’t deserve it. Not with the way I’ve made you feel…” he spoke in his lowest tones, his voice barely above a whisper in your apartment that never felt infiltrated by the noise of the world around you. Even now there was no sound, there was no one but Junmyeon in your garden. He reached for your waist, pulling himself closer to you, his head resting against your stomach. You bowed into his embrace, your crown meeting his. “I can forgive you. I have enough strength for that. But you cannot do this to me anymore. I am promising to be here from here on out but only if you honor your promise.” Junmyeon gave a weighted exhale at your steady answer, lifting himself as effortlessly as the morning sun above you, his lips meeting yours. ____________

Untitled - Part 10, Final Chapter

Genre: AU/Fluff

Pairing: Junmyeon x You (Female!Reader)

Warnings: None

Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10  |  Word Count: 2,058

Two Years Later

You were feeling super nostalgic tonight.

More specifically, you were feeling nostalgic about your wedding and honeymoon.

It wasn’t your anniversary or anything, so you’re not sure why you were feeling nostalgic... but you were currently snuggled in bed watching your wedding vlog on Junmyeon’s YouTube channel, so what are you gonna do?

But the really bad part was... Junmyeon wasn’t even here to be nostalgic with you!

He wasn’t on a trip, though; since you got married, you actually went on work trips with him. Because, unsurprisingly, getting married kind of changed everything.

Junmyeon officially introduced you to all of his viewers and followers when he uploaded your wedding video to his YouTube channel. He even included his proposal because, unbeknownst to you at the time, Jongdae was standing there filming everything. But, from then on, you had gone on most of his trips with him. Some resorts and brands even specifically invited you, which was pretty exciting, you weren’t going to lie.

Junmyeon even started tagging you in his pictures, and you now had over five thousand followers, so... yeah. Your marriage had changed quite a bit about your life.

But, anyway. Junmyeon currently wasn’t home because he was out for a Guy’s Night with Jongdae and some other friends. He would be home soon but for now, you had to be nostalgic all on your own.

You let out a soft, wistful sigh as you watched yourself trying on dresses, your heart glowing when you eventually tried on the dress. You remembered seeing it for the first time like it was yesterday, and you knew it would be the most beautiful piece of clothing you would wear for the rest of your life.

Junmyeon had cried when he saw you in that dress. What more can you ask for?

You beamed as you and Junmyeon picked out flowers and tasted cake. You giggled as Jongdae attempted to calm Junmyeon down as he got ready the morning of.  You had no idea he’d been so nervous!

And Trish had been right: you hadn’t been nervous at all. You’d been too happy and excited to be nervous. Just the thought of getting to call Junmyeon your husband had been enough to keep you floating on a cloud. But Trish, on the other hand, had been nervous just like you’d been nervous at her wedding.

Tears filled your eyes as you watched yourself walk down the aisle, as you saw the look on Junmyeon’s face when he saw you for the first time that day.

Taking pictures, cutting the cake, your first dance, throwing the bouquet... it had all been such a blur, but you got to relive almost every moment because of this video.

At the very end of the video, just before you drove away from the venue, Junmyeon had held the camera out in front of the both of you and finally properly introduced you -- as his wife.

From time to time, you still read the comments on the video because the vast majority of them had been extremely positive. Junmyeon’s subscribers had congratulated him and expressed their joy. Many of them had remarked on how beautiful you were, and Junmyeon had replied to some with comments like “I know, right?!” Reading them still made you smile and blush.

Just as you were scrolling back up to move on to another video, you heard the front door open downstairs.

“Babe, come up here!” you called out immediately, not even waiting for him to close the door.

“Coming!” he replied. You heard him taking off his jacket, and then you heard the soft thuds of his feet coming up the stairs. His eyebrows were raised when he appeared in the doorway of your bedroom, and he paused so he could ask, “What do you need?”

“I need you to snuggle with me,” you answered, lifting up the bed covers.

Junmyeon’s somewhat cautious expression quickly morphed to one of delight, his brow smoothing and his lips curving into a sweet smile. He obeyed immediately, stepping out of his shoes and sliding into bed next to you.

“I just watched our wedding video,” you sighed as you curled up into his embrace.

“So... honeymoon vlog next?” he asked expectantly.

“Yes,” you confirmed. “Honeymoon vlog next.”

You lifted your phone back up and scrolled to find it, tapping on your screen and shifting it to landscape mode so both of you could watch comfortably.

Unsurprisingly, the two of you had gone to the South of France for a two-week-long honeymoon.

Remember when you decided to go somewhere else for your first vacation with Junmyeon and save France for something more important?

Your honeymoon was exactly what you’d had in mind.

Junmyeon had planned a honeymoon for the two of you which had turned out to be even better than the trip of your dreams. He had taken you to Provence and Marseille, Toulouse, Nice, Cannes, and even a short side trip to Monaco. You’d seen and done and eaten things you’d never seen and done and eaten before, all with Junmyeon at your side.

And, somehow, he had managed to cram all fourteen days into a 25-minute vlog.

When he first uploaded it, you had been very skeptical that he had truly captured the magical time you’d had. The two of you had done and seen (and eaten) so much, how could he have possibly gotten it all down to just twenty-five minutes?!

But you had been in tears by the end of your first viewing, and you had immediately restarted it.

Junmyeon was just... a vlog genius. That’s all there was to it.

“Did you have a good time tonight?” you asked softly as the vlog began, opening on Junmyeon’s face as the two of you were getting on the plane.

Your husband hummed positively, pressing his lips into your hair. “What about you?”

“I’ve just been watching old videos because I’m feeling nostalgic,” you sighed.

“I’m sorry I missed most of it,” Junmyeon said softly. “You could have called me. I would’ve come home.”

“No,” you chuckled. “I didn’t want to interrupt Guy’s Night.”

“Yeah... but you laugh at my jokes a lot more than the guys do,” Junmyeon pointed out, sounding just a bit forlorn.

Your chuckle turned into a giggle, and you moved to press a quick kiss to his jaw. “Because I think you’re funny.”

“I am funny!”

“You are funny! It’s why I married you.”

“Oh?” he asked, and you could tell he was holding back a laugh. “You only married me because I’m funny? Not because I proposed to you in an incredibly romantic and thoughtful way?”

You hummed thoughtfully for a few moments, and then you said, “No, just because you’re funny.”

“Well,” he huffed. “Do you want to know why I married you?”

Your cheeks instantly flushed, and you brought your phone up closer to your face. “No, I’m good.”

Because you knew he would get incredibly cheesy and romantic and embarrassing.

Junmyeon tightened his arms around you, and you prepared for him to let out a sigh and pretend like he wasn’t going to just go ahead and tell you.

...And that’s exactly what he did.

He sighed, resting his head against yours and cuddling even deeper into the bed. “All right,” he murmured. “I won’t.”

The two of you watched the video for a bit, but after a few minutes, he turned and pressed a kiss into the top of your head.

“I married you because you’re nice,” he whispered.

And then a few minutes later, he added, “And because you’re smart.”

A smile tugged at your lips as you continued watching, and Junmyeon only waited about a minute before speaking again. “And because you’re beautiful.”

“I am?” you asked, finally indulging him.

“Oh, very,” he answered. “Every single part of you is beautiful.”

“Thank you,” you murmured, tilting your head so he could kiss your cheek.

“I also married you because you’re thoughtful and patient and brave and you write the best letters and you’re the greatest travel partner and you make me laugh at least once a day and you’re really comfy to cuddle with.”

A giggle bubbled up in your throat, and you finally paused the video so you could turn to face him. You were about to thank him again, but he took a breath and spoke before you had the chance.

“And... one of the very first reasons, one of the very big reasons why I knew I was going marry you... is the fact you went on a second date with me.”

“What do you mean?” you chuckled, reaching up to trace a finger over his jaw.

“I was such a doofus on our first date,” he continued with an embarrassed roll of his eyes. “I was trying to be all cool when you were annoyed with that untitled thing, and then I was afraid I’d hurt your feelings but instead of just bringing it up and apologizing, I panicked.”

“You were not a doofus!” you argued gently.

“I was,” he urged. “So the fact you actually agreed to go out with me again and gave me a second chance... I knew you had to be The One even back then.”

A wide, beaming grin pulled at your lips, and you leaned in to kiss him briefly.

"And the fact you kept making me nervous -- you still make me nervous -- “

But you cut him off, kissing him again, deeper and sweeter this time.

“I love you,” you whispered against his lips.

“I love you, too,” Junmyeon beamed as he reached up to smooth your hair back from your forehead.

“You didn’t really hurt my feelings, by the way,” you murmured. “Back then. I was a little... embarrassed, I guess? But I knew I was being ridiculous because you were only very slightly disagreeing with my opinion.”

“Hey, listen, I can’t help it if your opinion is --”

“Don’t you dare say my opinion is wrong,” you warned, raising your eyebrows.

“I’m just saying! Not everything needs a title!”

“Yes, it does,” you countered. “I would never, ever, ever write a book and not give it a title!”

“Well, that’s your choice. But you have to admit, not all art needs to be titled. Especially, like, pictures and stuff.”

You simply let out a somewhat annoyed sigh and turned back so you could continue watching the video. There was no point in arguing because, first of all, it was an incredibly silly thing to argue about it. Second of all, Junmyeon wasn’t going to change his mind, so it would be a waste of energy to try and convince him.

Junmyeon had and still did post pictures on Instagram with no caption. You simply tried to ignore it or come up with a caption in your head.

The only -- only -- time you hadn’t been annoyed at Junmyeon not adding a caption had been when he’d posted a picture after you’d gotten engaged. It had been a selfie of the two of you, though your bejeweled hand had covered up most of your faces.

Okay, so technically, he had added a caption. Maybe that was why you weren’t annoyed.

Because the caption had been “no caption needed.” Junmyeon had wanted to prove a point to you, the point that not all pictures needed a caption. Sometimes the image itself was enough.

But he had proven that point by still adding a caption, something he knew would appease you.

And maybe that was the big reason for you. The big reason why you knew he was The One.

He thought he was right, but he still let you be right, too. 

He was the perfect partner for you, in just about every way. He knew the perfect balance of give and take. He let you be alone when you needed it, but he didn’t hold back his clinginess when you were together. He supported you just like you supported him. He recognized the little things that annoyed and irked you and even though they didn’t necessarily annoy him, he still humored you and even went out of his way to minimize those annoyances. 

He didn’t mind when other things were left untitled, but he always made sure you were not.

LYON | PATHCODES VOL. II

ACT II. “a castle of glass”

Length - 2,585

Mood - wrathful, intemperate

Pairing - Baekhyun x Reader

Warning - language

“Ever since the first time I laid eyes on you I saw the truth No questions just proof They may talk, but I ain't hear a thing they said about you

Ever since the first time we laid Everybody want details, but don't say nothin' I won't say nothin' if you don't say nothin' Cause this is between us Yeah we gon' fight But I'mma love you till it's alright Ain't gon' find these answers outside Boy we don't need nobody's advice Give me a shoulder to cry on And I'll be alright I'll be the one you rely on This love Ain't none of your friends business Ain't none of my friends business It's ours, all ours, nobody else's”

“Business” by Teyana Taylor

____________

“Travel safely, see you soon,” you said to both ____ (Almaty Reader) and ____ (Arizona OG Reader), kissing each of their cheeks in a parting greeting.

“It was such a pleasure to see you again,” ____ (Arizona OG Reader) smiled elegantly as she reached to embrace you.

“Likewise,” you nodded to her as ____ (Almaty Reader) reached to embrace you as well.

“We probably want to organize a conference call within the next two weeks,” ____ (Berlin Reader) stated as she joined your parting circle, bristling at the chill of the wintry air that whipped around you.

The voices of your broader band were momentarily subdued by the gust of wind that had you all pulling your collars closed around your necks.

“Between-” you began eyeing ____ (Berlin Reader) questioningly.

“Well following our conversation yesterday probably just us ladies as a separate conference. A biweekly or even monthly check-in should suffice,” she said, pondering the subject before answering.

“Grand. Well we’ll talk later then,” you agreed as Baekhyun and Minseok approached.

“Ladies,” Minseok beamed at you all, missing ____’s (Berlin Reader) raised eyebrow.

“We’ll be off then. Bye everyone,” Jongin waved, ____’s (London Reader) hand in his as he turned to walk away. When you caught her eye again she raised her hand and demurely waved, her cheeks rosy when Jongin turned to tell her something as they continued into the airport.

Baekhyun came to your side, humbly taking your bag you’d set beside your feet as you said your goodbyes.

“I’ll get our boarding passes,” he said aloud in your direction, hurrying inside.

“Are you flying into Arizona still or-”

“I am going to spend a weekend with ____ (Almaty Reader), and then I’ll head back. MQ said he’ll meet you there before he goes out of town,” ____ (Arizona OG Reader) revealed which seemed to be a surprise to Chanyeol.

“Oh...I’ll see you then. Safe travels ladies,” he stepped back from ____ (Arizona OG Reader) who had only turned over her shoulder to address Chanyeol’s concern. You all nodded to him as he went past following Baekhyun who waited for him within the sliding doors.

You caught the look on his face as he watched you standing there before he knew that you were watching him, and quickly masked it with a pleasant smile before he too turned away.

____ (Almaty Reader) pulled ____ (Arizona OG Reader) along after Chanyeol left, hooking an arm through the crook of hers as they carried on conspiratorially.

“Can’t they do anything without us babysitting?” You caught them whispering before they walked out of earshot.

“Can I talk to you for a moment?” a sudden voice asked just beside you where ____ (Berlin Reader) also stood.

____ (Edinburgh Reader) had stayed behind while Sehun had gone in earlier with Kyungsoo and ____ (Colorado Reader) as they checked in and gathered their boarding tickets.

Since had ____ (Barcelona Reader) gone ahead with Tao back home to Barcelona she was alone in front of you all now, and very obviously uneasy.

“Me? Yes of course,” ____ (Berlin Reader) turned to her, gesturing for her to follow into the black SUV bearing Minseok’s trademark crest.

“Thank you as always for your hospitality, Minseok. Until next time,” you said cheerily, reaching a gloved hand out to him which he took and held in both of his, the light in his eyes flashing.

“Certainly. I hope to see you and Baekhyun and Yun Hee soon. Have you decided on a theme for her birthday party this year? As soon as you know please let me know so that I can plan her gift.” You were already modestly refusing his kindness as soon as the words passed his lips but he shook his head at you.

“Baekhyun is my family. And now you are part of his family. And now that family has extended to Yun Hee. If there is anything I can do, it is to take care of my family,” his smile remained sincere as he held your gaze but you had a prickling suspicion that you were not the only one who had revealed what you both had been keeping private.

“Baekhyun and I are so grateful to you Minseok. I could never thank you enough for how much you have blessed our family,” you reached forward to hug him and he held you close.

“He does love you, and I know you know that. No matter what happens, I hope that the both of you can be happy,” he spoke in deliberate muted tones and as he released you, you turned to see Baekhyun holding up the boarding tickets.

Your eyes narrowed at the way you could tell that he was gauging the result of your conversation.

His smile was pleasant, but it was the way his eyes cautiously lingered on you.

You were fuming.

___________

“It’s good to be home, jagi,” he tried meekly, looking at you through the rear view mirror where you’d sat with Yun Hee. After arriving at the airport you parted with ____ (Marseille Reader) who was traveling alone since Junmyeon had left abruptly following your New Year's event.

“Take it easy,” she muttered after a kiss to your cheek where you sent her off in her taxi.

Though you composed your fury at Minseok’s classy but brash attempt to contain you, and remained cordial to Baekhyun, you were seething by the time you were in French air.

You allowed him to drive to your mother’s house where you picked up a sleepy Yun Hee. “We colored for hours today. She was so excited to see you both but tired herself out too early.”

You listened, trying to calm your breathing as Baekhyun moved past you to pick her up.

“Darling?” Your mother asked, her tone apprehensive but you swallowed back the grit between your teeth and said your goodbyes.

Alone now and closer to home, your fury was piping white hot.

Ticking.

“If you want, I could-”

“I’m going to put Yun Hee to bed and then I’m going to the office,” you said, opening your door and hurrying to Yun Hee’s side. You opened the car door carefully, unbuckling her car seat so that you could bring her upstairs, leaving your purse and luggage in the car.

Your staff greeted you as you approached, standing clear of you as you went down the hall.

You heard a clatter of bags and buckles drop to the floor the moment after you’d reached Yun Hee’s door.

She stirred in your arms as you shifted her so that you could open the door.

“Shh shh mon petit,” you whispered, kissing her brow as you hurried inside.

You could see that your mother had given her her bath, washed her hair and brushed it.

You laid her in her crib bed, pulling off her shoes and socks, gently removing her jacket, and sweatpants.

She stirred at the sound of her door opening but you continued your task.

“Going to the office already? Jagi, let’s rest now. You don’t have to go in-”

You turned to look at him, a tempered glare set in your eyes.

He stood dumbfounded, unmoving as you turned to finish tucking your daughter in.

“Sleep well my baby,” you kissed her again gesturing for Baekhyun to do the same.

His stupor melted before he did as you asked, “sleep well my baby,” in an uncharacteristic stricken tone.

You headed to your bedroom, stripping as soon as you hit the door.

In your private wing, you knew based on past trials, that no one could hear how loud you could be. You wondered now whether that muted structural design was purposeful, and mockingly laughed aloud at the thought.

“Why are you going in now jagi?” He asked, following you into the room and closing the door to your wing noiselessly.

“Can you move please? I need to shower,” you asked icily breezing past him as he let you go in.

“Jagi, please. Why are you going in now?” He asked again, the whine in his voice rising.

You knew that as his voice rose he was coming closer to his breaking point. And even with that thought in the back of your mind, you couldn’t stop yourself.

“Baekhyun, can you give me a moment please? I want to shower quickly and head in. We’ve been gone for a couple days now and I don’t want to get behind again. We do need to pay bills. We can’t rely on Minseok for everything,” you sighed dismissively as you turned the knob to your shower, sighing again as the jets pulsed against your bare skin whisking away the grime of recycled stuffy air and sweat.

You heard him retreat from the bathroom and turned to see whether he left the door open, which he had.

You took your time to wash your hair and towel off before you began your hair care routine.

Usually Baekhyun volunteered to help you with this part. He thoroughly enjoyed every opportunity that he had to touch you and since you had moved in together he had been fascinated with touching your hair in its slick wet and thick dry state and feeling the difference in your curls.

But he remained in your bedroom, waiting futilely.

After blow drying your hair, and applying lotion to your body you marched into the bedroom, nude, to find clean underwear and a bra.

He watched you as you walked around him, his expression pained.

“Don’t stay there tonight, jagi,” he spoke in sotto voce.

You looked at him in the mirror above your drawer after pulling on a clean pair of underwear.

“Excuse me?” You asked, turning to look at him where he held his head down.

He took a steady breath before looking up at you.

“What’s wrong?” He asked, trying to keep his sniffles to a minimum.

You could hear his panic now. It was getting harder and harder for him to hold it back. And though some small part of you knew it was cruel, you laughed.

“How dare you tell Minseok to talk to me?! I mean that was just ridiculous. You’re going to speak to me through your friends now?” You challenged, seeing the panicked sweat beginning to break across his forehead. His eyes searched the floor as he thought of a response.

“Jagi he’s just...he’s my friend and I was worried and the guys were just-”

“They were just what Baekhyun? Who the fuck does he think he is telling me to mind and obey. We are engaged but that doesn’t mean-”

“He didn’t mean it like that. I’m sure he just-”

“Well tell me how he meant it then since I don’t know. What does he mean talking to me as if I’m supposed to do exactly as he says?! I don’t owe him anything but maybe you do since he paid for the roof over this house. In that case we owe Junmyeon too for taking care of us,” you snapped, throwing your hoop earrings down on top of the drawer before rising to find a fresh pair of jeans and top in your closet.

“That isn’t fair-”

“Oh that isn’t fair? Now we want to talk about what’s fair,” you snorted, pulling on your jeans and your tank top, snatching your Supreme hoodie from it’s hangar and your heeled boots from its rack.

You pulled a roll of socks from your drawer as you exited the walk in closet, hopping into them before sitting at the foot of your bed.

Baekhyun’s breathing was silent as he waited on the bed while you zipped up your boots, and hoodie.

“You have no right to tell me where to go and neither does he. If I need space Baekhyun then you should respect that,” you said, rising from where you sat to head towards the door.

Baekhyun rose quickly, shutting the door as you opened it, his hands trembling as he dropped them to his sides.

“Don’t go jagi. You shouldn’t drive like this,” he protested, daring to meet your glaring eyes with his reddened ones.

“There’s nothing wrong with me-”

“But there’s something wrong with us. Don’t leave. I don’t want to keep doing this. I don’t want to keep waiting-”

“Waiting for what? What are you waiting for? You could just say it Baekhyun. Say it,” you dared him, stepping back from the door with your arms crossed over your chest.

“Do you want to leave me, jagi?” He asked, stuttering through the sentence as a sob threatened to split his voice.

You stood unwavering, growing more and more exasperated with every sniffle you heard.

“Baekhyun I am going to scream if I can’t get out of this room-”

“Then scream at me. Just do it, jagi. But don’t leave me. Don’t go jagi please,” he begged you, coughing back sobs as you stared him down.

“Baekhyun I can’t do this with you right now. Let me go,” you asserted moving towards the door.

But he stepped forward, blocking the doorway, refusing to move out of your way.

“Jagi-”

“Baekhyun-”

“Don’t-”

“Let me go!” You screamed moving towards the door where he held it closed.

You pushed against him, hearing the door rattle as you struggled with each other.

“Stop it,” he begged you as you pushed away from him where he tried to hold you against his chest.

“Baekhyun let me go!” You cried out, but he held you there with your back against his chest, crying into your hair as you both slumped to the floor.

“Baekhyun...let me go…” your fury imploded as you screamed again, pushing at his arms that he held tight around your waist.

“No,” he protested.

“Let me go right now!” You screamed again, struggling to lift his arms from you.

“Baekhyun!” You screamed louder.

“Jagi stop, please stop. Stop,” he moaned plaintively, but you persisted.

“Baekhyun let me go! Let me go now! Right now!” You screamed hoarsely, struggling to turn in his arms to break his grasp.

He hiccuped, his grasp around your waist loosening for a second.

You took your chance, moving quickly to your feet.

But he was right on your heels, slamming the door closed just as you opened it.

“Baekhyun get away from me! Get away!” You rasped, turning to hit his chest, trying with all your might to push him back so you could get out of the door.

“No!” He choked out, as he grabbed your wrists.

“Just talk to me, jagi. Talk to me,” he pleaded, willing you to look up at him.

You were unaware of how heavily and erratically you were breathing, until you looked into his eyes and saw yourself reflected in his irises.

Your tamed hair was wild about your face, curls pasted with sweat against your forehead, your clean top and hoodie now sweat stained and disheveled.

You glowered at him, feeling a trembling sob rising up in him as he held you, waiting.

“Yes I want to leave you. I want space. I need to think. Baekhyun please let me go. Please,” you stated, closing your eyes.  

And he released you immediately.

“I...I’m sorry jagi. I’m sorry…” he whimpered, taking a step back from you.

You heard him descend to the floor in a slump as deeper sobs and gasps for air passed through him.

You turned to the door, taking and turning the handle in your suddenly shaking hands, feeling your resolve weaken as the door opened.

“______ I...I’m sorry,” he sputtered again, coughing.

You turned to look at him where he was slumped over on the floor, his hand gripping his chest as he took successive gasping breaths.

MARSEILLE || PATHCODES VOL. II

ACT I. “Qui n’avance pas, recule” Length - 4,648 Mood - trepidation, unease Pairing - Junmyeon x Reader

Warning - N/A

“You’ll know when you grow up//I still don’t get that saying//Living each day by holding things inside//Is that what becoming an adult is?” “Being An Adult” by Kim Na Young

December

“Junmyeon, you’re such a clever young man. Pity you weren’t the first born son,” the executive gave another booming laugh as he stood to shake hands with Junmyeon, who masked his annoyance within seconds of the man’s utterance.

From where you sat you could hear the sharp inhales ________ (Berlin Reader,) and ______ (New Almaty Reader) took discreetly before intermittently taking a sip of wine.

Even Minseok, gave a chic smile, his eyes flashing as he looked on at the gentleman.

In response, Minseok rose and gave the gentleman an equally firm hand shake, gazing at the rod straight posture Junmyeon held.

You rose to give the executive your farewells as well, standing to the side once you shook his hand as well as his board members.

“To the future of our mutual interests. Here is to the beginning of Elixier. May this mighty vision turn not only the power and heat of the Earth into healing springs for our customers but also turn our efforts into gold that we can thrive off of for generations to come,” he proclaimed, the boom in his voice as powerful as his girth.

You lifted your glass in unison with the small assembly to punctuate his toast, seeing Junmyeon thinking about making a toast of his own.

“We cannot thank you enough for your investment into the Pathcodes, and into Elixier. I will give my absolute best, and would appreciate your continued support. May the water of life invigorate not only our cause but may it transform the world. I thank you,” he bowed humbly, and the business executive did likewise before everyone took another hearty sip of wine before you resumed your seat as Junmyeon and Minseok spoke privately with the gentleman as he and his board members stepped away from the table.

You lowered your eyes as he led the executive and his private dining party away while you,  _____ (Berlin Reader,) and ______ (New Almaty Reader) waited for him to return.

“Ahem, you don’t have to add that comment-” _____ (Berlin Reader) began but you gave her a you-can’t-actually-be-serious look.

“I’m just saying…” she sighed as she took another generous sip of wine, before quickly tapping through her contacts and placing her phone to her ear, the acrylic of her manicured nails flashing at her brisk movements.

“_______ (Lyon Reader)? Hi. So did you speak with her? Mhm. Well we can wait a little while. Yes we can put it on hold. Mhm. Well if we need to have a conference with the two of them but separately then let’s do that. We are going to reevaluate our plan for the following year in a couple of days anyway. Yes. Mhm. I like the idea of them doing a soft opening or a mock opening at our venue. It’s possible. Mhm. But did she suggest that or are you suggesting it now…? Mhm. Mhm. Ok. Well I’ll see you in a couple of weeks. Yes I know...I can’t believe it’s December already too. Goodness. Don’t remind me. Mhm I hear her. Minseok wanted to send presents but I told him that we should wait until you all get here...well. Well if you say so. Mhm. My assistant is ready whenever you are. Ok. Sure. Of course. You know he loves to dote. There were a couple of gifts I told him we’d have to wait on...darling she isn’t old enough yet. Mhm. Mhm. So are you flying in earlier still or are you sending your associate and your intern? Mhm. Sure I’ve arranged flights either way. Mhm. Ok well we’ll see you soon. Mhm. Be well,” she held a quiet smile on her lips as she spoke with ______, your dear friend that you’d been texting earlier that day prior to your business meeting.

“We need his support...unfortunately….,” ______ (New Almaty Reader) sighed once she was done, before standing to collect the notes she worked to compile.

You were actually surprised that she hadn’t brought the iPads she’d ordered and compiled notes on.

“When I looked through his profile and spoke with ______ (Berlin Reader) about it again prior to today, he seemed more like an old school man. That he would rather have a pen and paper to look at instead of swiping through screens. We can always use them later,” she had said before the executive and his associates arrived.

You stood to stretch, rolling your shoulders back and forth before swinging your head side to side methodically.

You could hear Minseok and Junmyeon conversing as they walked up the spiral steps to the private dining area of Elixier, Junmyeon and Minseok’s brainchild.

Junmyeon gave a long yawn after they reached the top of the steps, shaking out his shoulders as Minseok continued on.

“We’ll do everything we can to secure his support. This is a prime moment for us Junmyeon. I know he’s an old associate of your brother’s but there was a reason for that. He is a powerful man. He heads not only the electrical components but also the internal distribution networks. Imagine the magnitude of this Junmyeon. Imagine being able to supply electricity provided through this geothermal energy not only to the local districts but throughout France. Imagine being able to not only heat your spa here at Elixier but also industrial plants and agricultural organizations throughout this country? All while providing power that is cost-effective, sustainable, and friendly to the environment? You have a brilliant idea here Junmyeon. I’m just your muscle...let me help you. Let me connect you with the right people,” Minseok said, keeping his voice level though the only persons in attendance besides your small party were all trusted staff men and women who were currently cleaning up the kitchen after your private meal.

Within Junmyeon’s eyes, you could see his reservations, and though you wished he would take a risk here, you knew better than to push him considering the past couple of years.

“We have had to delay this project for months at a time due to geophysical surveys we had to take. I won’t even go into more of the finances...but right now we have to decide. We’ve secured a lot of contracts within the past couple of weeks. I understand this is separate altogether from your father’s original plan. But keeping it old school isn’t good for the Earth and it isn’t what the Pathcodes is about...also with what’s happened with your brother...we need to transition far and away from that field in particular,” Minseok went on when Junmyeon had nothing to say.

He stayed quiet for another moment, considering all that his elder and dearest friend advised him of before he lifted his head, and looked to everyone standing around the dining table looking at him.

When his eyes found yours, you smiled encouragingly and he nodded to you.

“Well that settles it then...are we heading back to the hotel now? I want to sleep for at least two hours before I catch my flight,” ______ (New Almaty Reader) announced as she gathered her purse, her heels clicking as she moved towards the stairs.

_____ (Berlin Reader) was right on her heels, descending the steps behind her as soon as Minseok nodded.

He followed behind ______ (Berlin Reader) after taking a final sip of wine, and you moved to Junmyeon’s side after picking up your purse & tablet that sat in your seat beside you throughout the meeting.

“What do you really think?” You asked him, as he brought you into his side, wrapping your arms around his toned waist as he pressed a kiss against your brow.

His jaw tensed for a moment before he responded.

“I guess it’s up to me now. To not only save our family’s business but our legacy...and here I thought that I was going to remain the useless one,” he chuckled but you could hear the derision in his tone.

“Jun-” he shook his head, wrapped his arms around you as he kissed your nose.

“I want to go home and rest too before we head over there,” he said, clearly ending the conversation.

He released you, stepping out of your embrace to take your hand in his as you descended the steps with him leading the way.

When you made it to the entrance of Elixier, the staff stood at the kitchen entrance as if waiting to see you off.

The head chef had called everyone in early that morning to practice their serving routine for the business meeting you had just left.

She looked relieved to see you both standing at the foot of the stairs now ready to depart.

It meant her day of hard work was done for this weekend.

“Thank you so much for your support this weekend everyone. I cannot thank you enough for how diligent you all have been. We will be closed now until our grand opening in a couple day’s time. Please rest well and enjoy your time off. Have a good evening,” Junmyeon smiled, the tension of the last couple hours lifting as he smiled his brightest smile.

The staff cheered, walking up to you both and congratulating you too on your hard work.

“Champagne for the staff?” the head chef asked as she greeted you both.

“Why don’t we hold off until the night of the grand opening? That’s our final test,” Junmyeon said in response and she nodded immediately.

“Sir, Madam,” she winked at you as she took her leave back through the kitchen doors.

As the staff finished their goodbyes to you and Junmyeon, they also returned to the kitchen and you and Junmyeon headed out into the lobby before heading out where the valet waited with your car to greet you.

“Good evening Mr. Kim,” he said, inclining his head to Junmyeon who greeted him in turn.

He held the door for you, and took his time walking around the car before getting in and putting the car into drive.

After taking a nap together, you rested on Junmyeon’s chest while he anchored your weight against him, you woke refreshed, and took your time dressing, pulling on a simple dress and cardigan while Junmyeon pulled on dark blue slacks and a pressed white button shirt.

“We could take the evening to rest Junmyeon…” you suggested quietly, as he came up behind you to help you with the clasp of your necklace.

He pressed his hands against the top of your shoulders, sliding his hands down your frame until they touched your waist as he brought his face forward until his cheek touched yours, your faces now side by side.

He nuzzled your cheek for a moment, turning into your skin to kiss you gently.

You closed your eyes, pulling him by his hands so that he could wrap his arms around your waist and snuggle you closer.

“I’m not sure how to do this,” he whispered suddenly, his cheek once again pressed against your cheek.

His voice was so small, and afraid.

And you were afraid that if you opened your eyes, he would be smiling once again as if he hadn’t said a word.

So you remained quiet waiting for him to say more, but he only tightened his grip on your hands, squeezing them back where you squeezed them before intertwining your fingers.

“It’s ok to be afraid,” you whispered as quietly as you could slipping your fingers between his, offering him the moment where it was finally just you and him once again.

“But right now…” he gave a broken sigh, and you felt him stepping away, his hands opening as if to signal to you by gesture alone that he wanted to be left alone.

And you released him though you wanted to keep him close.

Open up to me.

“Junmyeon...please,” you said to his back as he turned to leave the bathroom.

He stopped, turning his chin over his shoulder, his eyes on the door.

“We don’t want to go too late. Visiting hours usually aren’t that long,” he whispered, his dress shoes scuffing the floor as he went.

Your drive to the hospital was quiet save for the pounding of your heart in your ears.

You thought you heard Junmyeon shifting away from you as he drove quietly.

He’d been distant for some time after the news of his father’s stroke, and the failure of his father to return to stable health status following the news of his brother’s reported indecency with the company stock.

“I thought she had reported it the first time I saw the news…” his mother had sniffed in your direction when you arrived early one morning with Junmyeon on his routine visit to check in on his father following a visit with ______ (Lyon Reader) once she returned from Edinburgh the day before.

Upon her return, she called you as soon as she landed.

“Are you busy today? Can we have lunch? It’s been so long,” she stated. You could hear her pouting.

“It has been so long. I think Junmyeon has a free afternoon today. Tomorrow we’ll be at the hospital to visit again,” you sighed and she waited a moment before responding.

“Well come by as soon as you can. Let’s enjoy an afternoon together?” she asked before you hung up and you hurried to get Junmyeon up from his nap so you could join them.

As soon as you arrived, she whisked you through the foyer to her private garden.

Junmyeon couldn’t hide his smile at the sight of the private sushi bar.

He couldn’t turn around to thank _______ (Lyon Reader) fast enough.

She was already hugging him, saying, “it’s so good to see you both! Please help yourself! Baekhyun and I sampled a little bit before you came just to make sure.”

He hugged her back, genuinely squeezing her.

She left you two to sample some of the sushi she ordered while she went to check on Yun Hee.

When she returned you made light conversation about plans of the other Pathcodes members and she expressed her concerns openly about Sehun, ________ (Edinburgh Reader,) and _______ (Colorado Reader.)

“I don’t know if we’ll be able to talk about it at our next planning meeting but I feel like we have to. Baekhyun and I are juggling a lot right now. I’m not sure about everyone else...but something has to shift. I feel like instead of bringing us closer together it sometimes tears us apart...and I can’t keep going like this…” she said while keeping her emotions in check.

You nodded, picking up where she left off.

“It’s been really hard…” you wanted to go on but you knew it wasn’t your place.

You hoped Junmyeon didn’t think you set up this little heart to heart behind his back.

But this conversation was something you couldn’t even get Junmyeon to think about in private.

You had his full attention in bed or when discussing details of the Pathcodes.

When it was time to brainstorm he was by your side.

When he was ready to release the storm brewing inside of him, he was...well.

But this heart to heart…?

Baekhyun arrived just at that moment, briskly walking through the garden doors to greet you all.

“안녕,” he grinned, leaning down to kiss ______ (Lyon Reader) full on the mouth before he came around to hug both you and Junmyeon.

“My mother is here to visit for a couple days so I had to pick her up from the airport,” he explained as he sat down and then you picked up on your conversation.

“I agree, jagi,” he said to your dear friend, intertwining his fingers within hers as he took her hands in his.

She looked to him as he spoke.

The open fondness in her eyes melted your heart as you watched her.

“Maybe we’re going about this in the wrong way...I’m not saying we should give up on the Pathcodes. I think we need to find out how to make this work for us. I want to build something for my family, but I don’t want it to break my family. Does that make sense?” Baekhyun asked as he looked at you and Junmyeon in his mansion garden.

“I can understand that. Adulthood is about responsibility but you shouldn’t have to strain and drive yourself and everyone around you to the edge…” you chimed in and _______ (Lyon Reader) nodded in agreement.

“Fatherhood suits you, Baekhyun,” Junmyeon murmured in adoration, and Baekhyun blushed his ears pink as he sputtered making ______ (Lyon Reader) giggle as she snuggled into him.

You laughed too, parallel to the scene.

“I was nervous at first,” Baekhyun confessed in his trademark sincerity as their butler excused herself and lit the candles on your table and around the garden.

You turned to see the way the garden looked when it was lit, and took a moment to breath in the soft perfume of the floral buds surrounding you.

It was dizzying in an exhilarating way.

It was so _____ (Lyon Reader.)

“Because it’s not an easy thing. Fatherhood asks more of you. I was already all in for sharing my life with _____ (Lyon Reader) and then when I found out we were going to have a child...a daughter...I can’t describe that feeling,” there were tears in your eyes to hear him tell it.

“I will do everything I can to protect our family. Everything and anything I can. I’ve always been ambitious in my own way and have always worked hard because that’s all I know. But fatherhood almost feels like...it’s going to sound silly but I feel like I suit up every day and accomplish different missions throughout my day and once I clear them I get the reward of coming home and…” he looked at ______ (Lyon Reader) his eyes full of an intimate love you were slightly embarrassed to witness.

“It doesn’t sound silly at all,” she whispered and you knew full well that she would have kissed him right then and there but she coyly smiled at him, leaning into him and allowing him to kiss the top of her head instead.

You let out a shaky breath as you wiped your tears, and Junmyeon took your hand.

“That same passion you have for protecting your family. That’s how I knew my father to be. He always did things in his own way but I tried to understand it to be for the best for us. I...I don’t know what kind of man I would be without his example,” he confessed, and you felt his hand twitch slightly as he spoke, his eyes on the wine glass in his hand that the butler filled what now felt like hours and hours ago.

He kept his emotions in check as he spoke, not revealing anything deeper than that for the rest of the evening.

And for you, you tried to allow that to be enough.

From your own experience as a child who hadn’t had the chance to meet her birth parents, and had only known a mother who was hard working but distant you could understand Junmyeon’s reserved appreciation.

While your mother made space for you to bloom intellectually, that was where her investment remained.

She worked earnestly and remained steadfast in providing a healthy environment for your developmental and intellectual maturity.

And you felt that you had had a healthful upbringing from that standpoint until you met _______ (Lyon Reader.)

And when you finally met her Baekhyun…

You realized that you had only touched love superficially, and vicariously through her.

And it scared you how it didn’t bother you at first, to sit side by side with her and to witness her falling in unabashed, audacious love.

And it frightened you all the more seeing how you loved Junmyeon.

And how he loved you.

It was sincere.

Of that you were sure.

He would never hurt you, and he kept what you offered of yourself safe in his arms.

But you realized that your heart was what you still kept safe even from you.

And he let you keep your heart safe because he did the same.

But when moments like this happened…

When he was looking his pain stricken father in the face, and facing his mortality with him…

You wished you could find the key to him.

December

“Don’t wake him. He needs to rest,” his mother sniffed once more in your direction as you sat beside Junmyeon who focused his attention on his father who dozed before him.

You heard the soft click of the hospital door behind you but you didn’t turn to see whether his mother had left or not.

You focused on Junmyeon beside you, mirroring the quiet way he sat with his hands open, his palms flat against his thighs.

He sat still for another breath before leaning forward and whispering to his sleeping father, “I’m sorry 아버지. I’m so sorry. Please. Please if there is anything that I can do, please let me know so that you are comfortable.”

You felt your eyes welling with tears as you listened to his request but held yourself back.

Liver cancer.

“Liver cancer?” Junmyeon had echoed the physician immediately upon being given the news.

You expected his elder brother to be in attendance and for him to have been the one to deliver the news to the board of their family enterprise.

You expected a lot of his elder brother.

But mismanagement of company funds had not been one of them.

But it was apparently something he felt entitled to the day he was given his share of the family business.

He found every opportunity to create mysterious financial managers to handle this fund or that fund that he swore would balance the budget and debts owed to stakeholders.

And year after year he was trusted, waving away his father’s questions and the board’s doubts.

Until the price of the company stock plummeted following the news broke by a local hard nosed reporter of his mismanagement that was beyond the scope of the definition entirely.

It blindsided Junmyeon, the board and his father who had already been admitted after a stroke some days before the report was released.

And then came the lawsuits.

You couldn’t keep count of how many people jumped ship and you’d stopped asking Junmyeon a long, long time ago.

He hesitated as he suddenly moved beside you but then he moved purposefully closer to his father, reaching for his hand, and holding his hand in his with uncertainty.

It was odd watching from your angle and you jumped at the sudden fluttering of his father’s eyes as he searched for the reason behind the sudden sensation.

He looked at you both, his gaze lingering on you for a slight moment before he looked at Junmyeon.

He opened his mouth to speak, clearing his throat repeatedly.

“You should have been my only child.”

What?

Junmyeon shifted uncomfortably as he placed his father’s hand down.

“아버지...what do you mean? What are you talking about? What’s going on..?”

His father shook his head from side to side, before he spoke again.

“Your brother made a fool of us. He’s gotten cocky. He thinks that because I’m not in good health that he can do whatever he wants. He thinks that he can just take over the company…” he coughed as he spoke with vigor and he shocked you by doing his best to sit up.

What was going on?

Hadn’t both himself and his wife always allowed their eldest to lead and to be in charge?

“아버지 I don’t understand. I thought he was doing your will…?” Junmyeon sat back after helping to prop his father up, fluffing the pillows behind him and supporting him as he shifted around to get comfortable.

“He asked me to sell my share among other things. I didn’t end up doing it and we did argue about it but I still thought he was doing what you asked of him to do,” Junmyeon said honestly.

“No...he shouldn’t have done that,” his father said shaking his head once again.

He looked at Junmyeon as if to say that now he had every intention of telling the truth.

“He’s gotten into trouble again. He’s always gambled with his own funds and trusted his wild investments to cover him. But he went too far this time…”

The cold sweat of fear was starting to seep into your clothes as you listened to him.

“He lied to some potential investors telling them that we were in possession of bitcoin. He even held an auction-”

Junmyeon shook his head in disbelief.

“No father. No...how can he do this to our family?”

“He’s not even your brother,” he said, his tone flat.

“...what?” You whispered.

“That is my brother. What do you mean?” Junmyeon’s tone was becoming panicked.

“He was my elder brother’s illegitimate child,” his father went on. “He was married at the time and always...always making mistakes without consequences. The younger brother always pays the price for the elder’s mistakes.”

His tone darkened as he continued.

“My elder brother was unfaithful. He was unfaithful to his vows. He was unfaithful to our family. And when it was revealed that there was a child to be born of his unfaithfulness because the young woman came forward...he turned to his younger brother because he couldn’t risk his father finding out that he had dishonored his marriage to his father’s trusted business partner. The marriage had been agreed upon and refused numerous times due to his eldest son’s reputation. To risk his father finding out about his marriage not only risked shame, but the very future of the family business. So he asked his younger brother to take the fall. ‘Just say that it was your child. Just say that she’s your girlfriend and that you weren’t careful…’”

You didn’t know where to look as you listened to his father but when you chanced a glance at Junmyeon, you felt fresh tears welling up at the miserable way he slumped his shoulders.

But his father persisted, “I was asked to marry your mother. And since his birth, she has always celebrated the birth of her eldest son. And she consented to the marriage as long as she could continue to see my elder brother as she always had. But I demanded that if we were meant to truly be married and if I were to keep my silence, that we had a child of our own.”

Junmyeon lowered his head to his hands.

It all made sense to you now.

The way she looked at him.

His birth had trapped her in a marriage that she didn’t want to a man she didn’t love.

Your heart broke to hear it revealed to Junmyeon and in this way.

Had his mother known that her secret would be revealed today?

How could she?

“Why would you want to have a child…? I don’t understand…” Junmyeon asked, his head still in his hands.

“I had to make sure our marriage was legitimate when our father began to find out about the other children. Our father began to ask me about our relationship, and the circumstances of our eldest son’s birth. I had to make sure. I had to protect my brother. And it was also for me. I wanted a family. I wanted happiness,” he answered, his tone softening as he reached for Junmyeon who jumped in surprise at his father’s touch.

“You’ve been my happiness Junmyeon. You’ve made me so proud. You’re a wonderful son…” he said, patting his son’s hand as he laid back down to rest, closing his eyes.