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animalsoffarmsanctuary · 6 years

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Clarabell Goat: A Decade of Love, Laughter, and Hope at Farm Sanctuary

It’s been said that you can learn a lot about someone by walking a mile in their shoes, and Farm Sanctuary resident Clarabell goat is no exception.

Rescued from neglect at just 6 months of age, Clarabell had such severe foot problems that veterinarians believed she would never walk again. But thanks to the devotion of a compassionate 12-year-old girl, Clarabell’s story turned out very differently. With her young friend’s unwavering support, Clarabell found her way to Farm Sanctuary, where she received the individualized care she needed to heal and thrive — and she’s been standing tall ever since.

Clarabell spent her early days at a petting zoo, where she met the girl who would save her life. While many people think of petting zoos as offering harmless, family-friendly fun, the reality for the animals is often quite different. These operations typically favor baby animals, but most visitors don’t stop to consider what happens to these babies when they grow up. They’re commonly sold for profit, and replaced with new babies to continue the cycle.

And when animals like Clarabell have health issues, petting-zoo operators often choose not to invest in their care, since they plan to replace them anyway. In Clarabell’s case, she was forced to crawl on her knees because untreated laminitis — a painful inflammatory condition — prevented her from walking normally. She also suffered from terrible lice and mange that left large bald patches across her body. Her needs were being ignored — that is, until she met the caring young person whose intervention would change her life.

Clarabell with her young rescuer.

Clarabell’s new friend knew that the little goat needed help, and her parents convinced the petting-zoo operator to relinquish her to their care. But Clarabell was not out of the woods yet: Veterinarian after veterinarian said there was nothing they could do, and recommended euthanasia to end her suffering. While sitting in the third vet’s waiting room, though, Clarabell and her young friend met someone who was perfectly positioned to help.

As fate would have it, Dan D’Eramo, Farm Sanctuary’s chief rescue and investigations officer at the time, was visiting the same veterinary hospital that day during the investigation of a nearby cruelty case. Upon meeting this goat in need, Dan immediately contacted National Shelter Director Susie Coston, setting the wheels in motion for a happy ending to Clarabell’s story. While others had given up on Clarabell, we believed that she could live a beautiful life if given the chance. We welcomed her without hesitation to our New York Shelter, where we quickly got to work trimming her hooves, treating her lice and mange, and giving her the TLC she needed to recover and thrive.

Clarabell lived indoors while she recuperated that winter, since she was still very thin and her body was especially sensitive to the cold as her hair grew back in. She was very receptive to the treatment she received and loved her caregivers from the start, clearly understanding that we had her best interests at heart. Day by day, she took small steps on the road to recovery; after repeated hoof trimmings, for example, she was able to put her crawling days behind her and begin to walk again! But she still needed some extra support as she learned to navigate the world around her. Enter her adorable, yet functional, pink converse sneakers: perfect for adding traction on the tile floors of our original “white house” hospital building.

Clarabell in her adorable, functional shoes!

As much as Clarabell loved her caregivers, we knew that she would truly thrive in a herd of her own. Just months earlier, we’d rescued a group of lambs from terrible circumstances. Clarabell bonded with one of them, Madeline, while both were at the Cornell University Hospital for Animals (where Clarabell had been taken for radiographs and Madeline was receiving treatment). We decided to try the two together, and they bonded right away. Once both girls were ready, they moved in with our main sheep flock.

It was in the sheep barn that Clarabell began to truly shine; once her physical health had improved, nothing could stop her from being herself and sharing her incredible personality with the world! She’s always been very funny; one of our favorite Clarabell memories (and a reason we now ask people to leave their personal belongings outside the barn) involved her fondness for reaching into visitors’ bags, figuring that she’d help herself to their contents! She’s always been a hit with her adoring fans, whether on our sanctuary tours or through our live-streaming explore.org cams, and she’s been a dear and supportive friend to all who are lucky enough to know her.

Clarabell and her dear friend Joey.

Our late friend Joey goat, for example, benefited from Clarabell’s sweet company toward the end of his life. As Joey slowed down and began to have trouble keeping up with the herd, Clarabell would stay by his side as he walked at his own pace to and from the barn, seeing to it that he had the support and companionship he needed. She would also keep Samantha — a special-needs sheep from the same group as Madeline — company when she lagged behind the flock, and always saw to it that shy Samantha got her fair share of food around pushier flockmates. And then there’s her sweet interspecies relationship with Francis sheep — they chose each other out of approximately 80 other individuals in their barn and are often seen nuzzling each other!

Clarabelle and Francis.

One of her closest relationships, however, has been with Skye, the former head of the sheep barn’s goat contingent, who moved to another part of the sanctuary to convalesce during an illness. Skye’s absence was tough for Clarabell, and she began spending more and more time alone. While Clarabell is well liked by all (goat, sheep, and human alike), it took her some time to once again find a pal she’d connect with as strongly as she had with Skye.

Panza, Shannon, and Clarabell relaxing in the barn.

We were delighted when she found that connection in a newer friend, Panza goat. Like Clarabell, Panza hadn’t had a close friend among the barn’s goat crew. Bruce, Cynthia, and Shannon goats, for example, spend much of their time together; though Panza came to us from the same rescue, she wasn’t quite as close with the group. Everything changed, however, when she connected with Clarabell, and the girls have grown quite close. (They even look a little alike, with their similar facial stripes!)

Clarabell and Panza.

From the neglected youngster we met a decade ago to the beautiful girl (both inside and out) she is today, Clarabell’s inspiring transformation is a true testament to the power that each of us, young or old, has to make a difference in the life of another. In her 10 years with us and counting, this incredible ambassador has helped so many individuals see that each and every farm animal is someone, not something!

Please share Clarabell’s story of survival and resilience. Together, we can increase awareness and understanding about the rich emotional lives of goats like her. With your support, we can continue to promote compassionate vegan living through rescue, education, and advocacy work. A compassionate world begins with you!

#goats #animals #animal rescue #goat #animal #New York Shelter #Clarabell #New York Shelter goats #New York Shelter sheep barn #petting zoos #animal videos

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instantsongwerewolf · 3 years

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Here is an email response from the Center of Disease Control in the U.S.A.

The question was " If anyone is about to get vaccinated do they need to get tested first?" The logic is if you need to wait for a flu to disappear before getting a flu shot, you should also wait till you feel better before getting that injection, right?

Let us see is FB will try to remove this response that comes from the CDC. By the way alot of stats can be found at the site and Mr Gates the richest man in the world after Elon Musk has fortified the coffers of the CD with so much bacon, there is no chance it will ever run out of bacon in this century. With so much bacon invested into the CDC one must wonder if it truly is always acting as an independent body with B.G. sitting on the board

Thank you for contacting CDC-INFO.

Here is the information you requested on COVID-19 vaccine.

COVID-19 vaccination should be offered to you whether or not you already had COVID-19.

Line 2 : "You should not be required to have a test for prior infection before you get the vaccine".

However, if you currently have COVID-19, you should wait to get the vaccine until:

• at least 10 days have passed since your symptoms first appeared, and

• at least 24 hours have passed since you have had no fever without the use of fever-reducing medicine, and

• your other COVID-19 symptoms have improved.

It is rare for someone who has had COVID-19 to get infected again. It also is uncommon for people who do get COVID-19 again to get it in the months after they recovered from their first infection. Therefore, if you recently had COVID-19 you may choose to wait to get the vaccine until 90 days have passed, however you are not required to wait 90 days before getting a COVID-19 vaccine. With both currently authorized and available COVID-19 mRNA vaccines, you will need 2 shots to get the most protection. Johnson & Johnson's Janssen COVID-19 vaccine, which is a viral vector vaccine, only requires one dose.

If you were treated for COVID-19 symptoms with monoclonal antibodies or convalescent plasma, you should wait 90 days before getting a COVID-19 vaccine. Talk to your doctor if you are unsure what treatments you received or if you have additional questions about getting a COVID-19 vaccine.

If you had COVID-19 and were treated with monoclonal antibodies or convalescent plasma, you should wait at least 90 days after treatment before getting the vaccine. This is to avoid interference of the antibody treatment with the immune response produced by the vaccine. This is a precaution until additional information becomes available about how these treatments may interfere with the immune response produced by the vaccine.

The line 2 response is saying you should not have to get a test for possible prior Covid infection but in the next they do say basically that if you are feeling sick...wait..

Personal statement :

Without any injection the Natural Defensive System

of the human body will kick in overdrive.

check the stats online.

A large percentage, from UPWARDS of 95% percent, who have been infected by the regular strain will recover at home.

No vaccine. Regular strain.

No BS statement. DYDD.

Of the remaining % who go to the hospital most recover

and a smaller percentage don't . The actual death rate within the % varies from country to country. The type of therapy can also impact the survival rate. People who react badly to respirator therapy ..well...not good. Some meds , under development, in the 3rd trial phase are administered to patients in critical care . Results vary. If any of your loved ones end up in the hospital ask the doctor if they are administering new drug therapies besides respirators.

Upwards of 95% of infected recover.

of the remaining 5%, 10 to 20 % pass on.

No percentage of deaths is good .

None.

The vaccine does not guarantee you will not catch it.

The vaccine will not be able to tell your body how to deal with a variant since the injected technology was not pre built with attack instructions for variants that did not exist at the time of the injection technology.

If the variant is part original strain and part something else that's when it can get touchy as your defense system was provided instructions on how to deal with one but not with the other.

Variants can change in 10 to 12 hours.

Variants become variants because the strain is looking for a host.

If the host is fortified with a vaccine to fight strain #1 then the strain will attempt to alter itself so that it can survive when it attacks someone else but as a variant and not as strain #1

In the world of vaccine science some scientists ( who have worked in vaccine research for over 30 years, do not agree with mass vaccinations on the premise that the strain will morph itself very quickly within that population of millions that got their injections for strain #1 all at the same time.

The fear is that the strain will morph itself several times over and will then be able to latch onto to anyone of the many millions who got the vaccine .

The same doctors have said that " the technology behind this vaccine is avant guard" but the way the population is being mass injected has not taken in account how quickly the strain will morph and spread. " Some have even said that the vaccine should have been delivered to millions after the pandemic period as we do with other vaccines, and in the meantime rush develop medical therapies that will stop the virus in its original strain form in its tracks while in the body of an infected person whose NDS will kick in and kill the invading virus with the right combinations of medecinal therapies.

In the event that the variant strains storm through countries due to morphing, then the actual fatality rates will be .....

The medicinal therapies that have worked to some degree on the 1st strain won't work on the variants as the drug companies have to redesign the drugs to fight an invader who has changed.

Redesigning drug therapies for an invader who is always changing is a frustrating game of cat and mouse but in this case the mouse is smarter and faster.

Are the scientist who dedicated most of their lives to vaccine research over reacting to the way in which the injection are being administered?

Will the variants morph and morph and morph?

If they do then the population growth on this planet will drop and we may even see a significant drop in the world population.

The fact that Mr Gates sits on the W.H.O. is concerning. His donation amounts to the vaccine industry is STAGGERING.

He is on record stating that population growth issues can be dealt with the correct type of vaccines.

Is the present vaccine part of this objective?

I truly hope not.

The scientists who have sacrificed and are dedicated to vaccine technology are concerned.

The very vaccines that were designed to save humanity might become redundant and out of date if variants morph to the 10th degree or higher.

If you do have contacts with health officials or with senators who represent your state, you have the right to express your concern.

You have the right to ask questions that are not politically correct.

Very big money has been invested .

Very powerful people.

And the C.D.C. and the W.H.O. are no longer independent as they have been fed by B.G.

Mr Gates is spending colossal amounts to ensure that limited info is available on social media everywhere.

We all have the right to know.

Not just B.G. or Vaccine Pharma .

All of us.

Be safe.

God bless.

The world health organization and the CDC have alot of available data.

I recommend you all DYDD. Most of the info that is being broadcasted on tv is not accurate. Sharing it on FB is next to impossible but email still works. Messenger services that belong to s.m. should not be used as they are monitored , and message content can be blocked from going where you want it to go.

To fight the war of "ignorance" we need to recognize that a war has been enacted. Censorship is the first fruit of "pending socialism and freedom death". Hoping it will go away and fix itself without fighting the good fight is not the way to go.

Dan Bongino is someone who would read this on air.

If any of you have his email send it to him via email

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whalefairyfandom12 · 6 years

Text

ALT ER LOVE

Summary: Dan is the breakout star of the newest international sensation, SKAM Britain, with the upcoming season centered around his character Isak. The only problem is that the actor portraying Isak’s love interest is enough to send the carefully labeled details of Dan’s life into disorder.

Phil had never wanted to be an actor, but peer pressure and having a film credit on his uni application was enough to make him audition. Somehow his meager talent lands him the role of Even, starring opposite one of the biggest names in the industry and his not-so-secret celebrity crush. The reality of the situation is more than he’d ever signed up for, and as fiction starts to bleed into reality the only thing anyone knows for certain is that understanding love isn’t nearly as easy without a script.

A/N: Though this certainly talks about Skam and its characters, it’s not necessary to have seen the show to understand what’s happening. It’s really just an actor au with an excuse for me to talk about the show haha. (But really, you should watch it if you haven’t already as it’s amazing.) I hope you enjoy!

Masterpost

Week One

Wednesday 10:30

The poster was hanging from the bulletin board, already wrinkled and torn in several places.

Following the success of the Norwegian hit show SKAM and its subsequent British remake we are currently holding auditions for the upcoming season! The series is an international phenomenon praised for its authentic portrayal of teenagers and focuses on telling real stories based on the hardships and pressures of being in college. We’re conducting an extensive search to find British teenagers for the cast. NO ACTING EXPERIENCE REQUIRED.

Phil Lester was not an actor. The last time he’d participated in a play was in Year Two during a retelling of the birth of Jesus, and he’d almost passed out from stage fright. He had no interest in acting, and he hadn’t watched any of the iterations of Skam. He did, however, want to get a degree in video post production, which was why he was standing in the middle of the hall trying to determine if he thought he’d pass out if he tried to audition.

Rosie came to a halt beside him, adjusting her grip on her backpack. Her hair was back to its natural blonde color, falling loose around her shoulders. “Are you going to audition?” she asked.

“Are you?” he countered.

She laughed. “No, definitely not. I can’t act to save my life.”

“I can’t either, but it would look really good on my application.” He paused. “Is it bad I’ve never seen Skam?”

Rosie’s eyes widened in horror he hoped was mock but looked fairly genuine. “How have you lived?”

“I’ve seen gifs on Tumblr,” he said defensively. “And I keep meaning to, but I don’t have time.” He was even following some of the gif blogs, but that was more because of Dan Howell than anything about the show.

“You’d get to make out with Dan Howell if you auditioned for Even’s role,” Rosie said, apparently reading his mind. “That’s reason enough.”

“I didn’t know Dan was your type.”

“He’s a little bit everyone’s type, but I know he’s yours.” She raised her eyebrows, nudging him suggestively. “You forget I’ve been on your Tumblr.”

Phil flushed. “Skam is everywhere,” he said, protest weak even to his own ears. “It’s impossible to avoid it.”

“Uh huh,” Rosie said, looking entirely too smug for his liking. “But seriously, you should go for it. You fit everything they’re looking for and I think you’d make a good Even.”

“Yeah?”

“You both like film, for one. But if you do get the part you have to bring me Dan’s signature.”

“I’m telling Rose.”

Rosie rolled her eyes. “Like she’s one to talk. She’s had a crush on Hannah Witton since season one.”

“Hannah’s a little bit everyone’s type,” Phil echoed, earning himself a snort of laughter.

“Exactly.” She patted him on the shoulder, grip surprisingly firm. “Alright, I have Classical Literature but I’ll talk to you after you get the part.”

Phil shook his head, gesture fond. “It’s not going to happen!” he called after her. “I don’t even know if I’m going to sign up.”

Rosie laughed, ignoring his words in favor of a wave as she disappeared around the corner. Phil watched her leave before turning his attention back to the poster. He sighed, trainers scuffing against the floor. He stretched a tentative hand towards the paper before faltering at the last minute.

At this rate he was definitely going to be late to maths.

Signing up didn’t mean he had to go. He could always change his mind, even if he was offered the part. He’d probably end up in the background anyway, no speaking required.

Phil tore one of the paper strips off the bottom, folding it in half and tucking the URL into his pocket. It wasn’t going to hurt anything to just see what happened after all. He was sure nothing was going to come of it, and if it also presented a convenient excuse to meet Dan, well, what Rosie didn’t know wouldn’t kill her.

Wednesday 10:30

At age sixteen Daniel Howell was quickly rising through the ranks as one of the most influential up and coming English actors. SKAM Britain had taken off internationally, being praised for its loyalty to its source material while still giving it a fresh cultural spin.

It was everything six year old Dan had fantasized about: fame, recognition, finally being a real actor. But despite finally living the childhood dream sixteen year old Dan just really wanted a nap.

Unfortunately, Tyler Oakley had other plans.

Said pain in his ass whacked him in the arm with the script, jolting him awake. “Focus!”

Dan winced, rubbing the undoubtedly forming bruise. “I am!” A pregnant pause. “Fine,” he amended. “I’m trying. It’s just...it’s been a long day. Week. Life.”

Tyler’s expression softened slightly. Because unlike Chris he respected Dan’s boundaries, he kindly didn’t point out the fact that it was only 10:30 and therefore too early to really make the classification as a ‘long day.’ “Okay. I think we know the lines anyway.”

Dan exhaled, flopping back onto the other boy’s bed. His relief was probably obvious, but he was too tired to care. “Thank fuck.”

Tyler mimicked his movements, staring at the ceiling. “Any luck with casting Even yet?”

“Not yet. There are a few auditions left today and tomorrow, but I have to decide before Friday.” He rolled over and buried his face in the pillows, closing his eyes. Maybe if he was lucky he’d suffocate to death. “I don’t know. I think Nick would like Felix or a person like that. Someone who's already well-known, but nothing feels right yet. There’s a…” Dan trailed off and snapped his fingers, looking at Tyler expectantly. “You know?”

The other boy was staring at him uncomprehendingly, brow furrowed. “No, not really.”

“It’s like when you meet someone and there’s a spark or chemistry or whatever you want to call it, but you click and everything feels like it just works.”

Tyler bolted upright, holding up a hand. “Hang on. Are we still talking about acting or have we moved on?”

Dan rolled his eyes. He didn’t know why he bothered, honestly. “Never mind. Forget I said anything.”

“Because we can totally talk about your love life,” Tyler continued, glee thinly veiled. “Or wait, you’d actually need to have a love life to talk about it.”

Dan scowled, flipping him off. He retracted any and all previous statements about Tyler being a good friend. “I told you, I’m not--”

“Interested in a relationship,” his friend finished, pulling a face. “I know. We all know. But imagine how cute it would be if you started dating whoever was cast as Even.” Dan frowned, opening his mouth to respond but Tyler cut him off again. “I know you’re not gay. I’m just saying, everyone loves a good costar romance and imagine how much hotter the sex scenes would be.”

Dan let out an undignified yelp as he tumbled off the bed, resisting the urge to bang his head against the wall in an attempt to scour the images from his brain. His face was burning as he stumbled to his feet, yanking open the door. “Bonding time’s over! Thanks for going over the lines with me.”

Tyler smirked, stretching out on the mattress. “There’s something I like about the idea of two really tall men--”

Dan jammed his fingers in his ears. “Goodbye Tyler,” he said loudly, but unfortunately not loudly enough to miss the rest of the sentence. At this point he’d give half of every paycheck for the creation of brain bleach.

Tyler laughed. “Have a good time meeting your future lovers.”

Dan picked up one of the shoes laying by the door, aiming it at his costar’s head. In his visions of fame, six year old Dan hadn’t accounted for the assholes that would become his colleagues and only friends. Which was more than a little depressing to think about, really. He wrinkled his nose as he stepped outside, heading towards his trailer.

And they say to follow your dreams.

Wednesday 17:15

The world looked a little better upside down. Phil’s mum had always been a big advocate for approaching problems from multiple angles, and though she probably hadn’t meant it literally he found it kind of relaxing to pretend he was a fruit bat whose biggest problems were surviving until the next night.

His laptop was open to the audition application, name and email already filled in which was as far as he’d gotten before panicking. If he thought he could screw his head on enough to focus actually watching some of the episodes instead of relying on Tumblr’s slightly biased opinions would probably be a good place to start.

From what he did know, Dan was playing Isak Valtersen, the main character of season three. Isak was gay and his storyline primarily revolved around accepting himself, coming out, and meeting Even. Dan was one of the original cast members, and from the numerous crying gifs on Tumblr was popular with the viewers.

Even Bech Næsheim was Isak’s love interest, and that was basically all Phil knew about him. He’d skimmed the wikipedia page once out of curiosity and seen the film connection that Rosie had pointed out and a lot of gifs of Even and Isak kissing. Like a lot. Like so many he was already blushing thinking about having to do all of that with Dan.

Phil had been an out and proud bisexual since he was twelve and had his share of boyfriends since then, so it wasn’t the thought of kissing another boy that had him so nervous. It was that the boy in question was Dan.

Who, not that he was looking or anything but from a video he’d found of Dan making out with some girl from another movie, looked like he was a great kisser.

He exhaled, puffing out his cheeks as he rolled right side up. The room spun, and he blinked a few times rapidly to try and unsuccessfully clear his head. He reached for his laptop, entering his password. The audition form loaded again, and he finished filling out his information and pressed send before he could angst about it again for another six hours. Now all that was left to do was wait.

Wednesday 19:23

Dan was ready to implode and take the rest of the world with him. He didn’t understand how it was possible to make an improv scene about hiding a body boring, but most of the actors were finding a way. He slumped in his seat, sighing loudly enough for Nick to shoot him a dirty look. The director held two fingers and Dan gave his best impression of a ‘what the fuck is that supposed to mean’ face.

Nick’s lips thinned. “Twenty two more people,” he said as Peter exited with a flourish. “And then we’re done.”

Dan groaned. “That’s twenty two too many. And then a hundred more tomorrow.”

“Have you see anyone you like?” Bertie asked before Nick could respond. Dan almost felt bad for him. The screenwriter spent a lot of his time smoothing things out between Nick and the rest of the cast. “They don’t have to be from today.”

He shrugged. “Peter was okay.” He’d wrung a laugh out of him with his improv anyway, which was more than could be said for everyone else.

“He went off script quickly,” Bertie said, flipping through his binder. “Since we’ve left casting Even five days before we start filming,” Dan cringed, sinking further into his seat. “It’s important whoever we cast can think on their feet.”

“I’m going to let the next one in,” Nick said. “Try to look less like you’re being held against your will.”

Dan rolled his pencil between his fingers, picking at the places where the wood had started to chip. Twenty two more people and he could go back to staring at the walls in his trailer. At least filming started soon, and even if everything else was going to shit at least that was something that still made sense.

Thursday 16:27

Phil had moved three meters in the past two hours. The rest of the crowd snaked around the block and into the audition building, better looking and infinitely more talented candidates making excited conversation. He estimated there were still a good few hours before he reached the door, but he was already starting to feel ridiculously anxious. His nerves weren’t helped by the fact that despite leaving the flat with plenty of time to spare, he was the last one in line. He made a face, prying his fist open and wiping the sweat against his shirt.

The crowd inched forwards.

He jumped as his phone vibrated, a thumbs up from Rose and a gif of Dan in a beanie from Rosie. He smiled, the encouragement only slightly lessening the urge to throw up. He’d never been very good at job interviews and this was a million times worse.

Then again, the application had had a lot of unusual questions so maybe the experience wouldn’t be as painful as he was anticipating. Only one of the questions asked about prior acting experience, and most of them were assessing with what he liked to do in his free time or if he had any social media accounts. He wasn’t sure how any of that was relevant to acting, exactly, but the less he had to advertise his faults the better.

The line moved forwards, three centimeters, this time.

Phil sighed, eyeing the pavement dubiously before sitting down. He had a feeling he was going to be here for awhile.

Thursday 18:43

“I'm sure that in a parallel universe there's an Isak and an Even who're lying in the exact same way in the exact same place, only, like the curtains are a different color or something.”

Mark was quiet. He met Dan’s gaze evenly, voice subdued. “So yellow curtains, then?”

“Yeah.”

A melancholy smile. “I think you’ve had enough jay now.”

“Haven’t you ever thought about that?” Dan asked, trying to keep his tone wistful. He couldn’t be the only one that spent every night wide awake and imagining the other versions of himself in realities where he regretted his life a little less.

“Yeah, but I guess I’m just starting to feel so...I don’t know. Lonely.”

“It’s interesting though,” he insisted.

Mark sighed heavily, shoulders slumping. “I don’t like it. Freaks me out.”

“It freaks you out?”

“Not freaked out like a horror movie, but like feeling alone. That sort of freaked out, I guess. That like it's your head it's you and your head and all of your thoughts.

“Alone in your head, what do you mean?”

“A ‘The Mind is Alone’ feeling.” Dan frowned. “A what feeling? The mind is alone?”

“Because the only thing that exists is you and your thoughts, right? You can't escape from your own thoughts, The only way to do that is to die.” Mark curled further in on himself, averting his gaze. Dan had a feeling he was trying to portray the heaviness of the dialogue, but he’d already started out the perfect picture of forlorn that he had limited ways to try and look more depressing.

“That's dark, though.”

“Yeah, but haven't you ever thought about that?”

He did a double take. “No?” Mark laughed, a more than a little bitter sound. “Jesus! I'd forgotten how young you are.”

Dan’s smile was more of a grimace as he dropped his script on the table. Both Nick and Bertie were nodding appraisingly in Mark’s direction, and his heart sank. It was rare that the two ever agreed on anything, and it was looking more and more like Mark was going to get the part. He retreated to his seat, rolling the pencil between his fingers as Nick gave Mark the usual speech about expecting-a-call and -thanks-for-your-time.

“Thanks!” Mark said cheerily. He shot Dan a bright smile, offering a wave. Dan returned the gestures with considerably less enthusiasm as the other boy left the room.

“I think Mark is the best we’ve seen so far,” Bertie was saying. Dan tried to pretend he was interested.

“I agree,” Nick said. “What do you think, Dan?”

He hesitated. “Fine. Yeah, he was great.”

The director and writer exchanged exasperated looks, which he thought was rather unfair. Sure he could be a little high maintenance sometimes (read, most of the time) but he didn’t have anything on someone like Jake Paul.

“What didn’t you like about him?”

“Nothing really. It’s just, don’t you think it should’ve had more lightheartedness?” Dan said in one breath. “In the beginning lines, at least. Isak and Even have spent all this time chasing after each other and trying to figure out what this connection is between them while all of these other tensions and pressures keep piling up until finally they kiss and realize that the idea of Isak-and-Even isn’t so crazy after all.”

“And?”

“And don’t you think after spending the night together and the way both of them feel free and safe enough to let their walls down that the morning after wouldn’t seem so much like someone died? And if the scene starts mellow there’s nowhere else to go.”

Nick sighed, rubbing a hand over his beard. “You’re right,” he admitted. Dan tried not to fall off his seat in shock. “I noticed that too, but there’s never going to be a perfect actor that gets everything right the first time. Not even Meryl Streep. If you keep waiting for someone like that you’re never going to be happy.”

“Maybe. I guess we’ll see.” Dan set his jaw, dropping his gaze to the table determinedly. There was a challenge if ever he’d heard one. Now he just had to hope the actor was out there that could prove him right.

Thursday 20:15

Phil’s trainers squeaked against the floor as he followed the man into the audition hall. The sound was uncomfortably loud in the silence, and despite his nerves he was relieved when they finally reached the room. The man pushed the double doors open, entering without hesitation. He could make out the silhouettes of a table and two people sitting at the head, flanking the empty seat. They looked like they were engrossed in a conversation, pausing as Phil took a hesitant step forwards.

The first thing he saw was Dan, head bent over his phone and dark curls soft where they fell against his forehead. The actor was wearing a biker jacket unzipped over a gray shirt and black skinny jeans, outfit complete with the bored and slightly tortured look on his face. Beside him was a blond haired man in glasses, and the red haired man who’d let him in.

The latter cleared his throat, stepping forward with a practiced smile, “My name is Nicholas Young and I’m the director of SKAM Britain. This is Bertie Gilbert, our screenwriter. And of course, Daniel Howell who plays Isak Valtersen.”

Phil wet his lips reflexively, trying for a smile. “Hi. I’m Phil, it’s nice to meet you.” Dan looked up at his response, and he almost wished he hadn’t because wow. He’d never really understood the whole ‘the eyes are everything’ shtick everyone was always on about in the movies, but clearly he hadn’t been around the right people.

“We’re glad you could make it,” Bertie said. He pulled one of the empty chairs away from the table and Phil took a seat, unable to resist glancing back in Dan’s direction. The other boy was still staring back and he dropped his gaze, face warm.

“As you know,” Nick took over. “Skam is unusual in how interactive it is. It’s not just a show, it’s an experience.” Dan snorted quietly, and Phil smiled despite himself. “Clips are released in real time, and filming and writing can be very intensive to meet the deadlines. The characters have real social media accounts, and pictures need to be shot outside of filming. Even doesn’t have an Instagram, but you’ll be required to be in Isak’s photos as well as some groups shots and promo pictures. The point is, this is not a commitment to be taken lightly and we’re only looking for candidates that will invest the time and effort necessary for an experience this time consuming.”

“Okay,” Phil said weakly.

Bertie flashed him what he assumed was supposed to be a reassuring thumbs up. “Just focus on the audition for now. You’ve got this.”

Actually Phil was becoming more and more convinced he didn’t got this, but he nodded anyway.

“We’ll start with a short reading of one of the scenes to warm up,” Nick said. “Followed by an improv and a final read through with Dan.” He pushed the stack of papers Phil’s direction. “It’s in order.”

Phil shuffled the stack, scanning the first page. A hotel room. EVEN is eating a mini burger. His energy is infectious, almost too much so.

“Whenever you’re ready, Phil,” Bertie said.

He relaxed his death grip where it was starting to wrinkle the script, nerves back with a vengeance. He let his eyes drift shut, envisioning the walls of a hotel building around him.

Even was feeling on top of the world, Isak sitting across from him. Affection overtook him at the sight, knocking him off his feet and dissolving his expression into a smile. After everything they were finally here, and maybe it wasn’t going to last forever but he’d be damned if he wasn’t going to keep it for as long as he could.

His eyes snapped open. He met the other boy’s gaze with a smile.

“You don’t think we’ll get married?” he asked, surprise mingling with genuine fondness. It had become impossible to do anything without feeling ridiculously, stupidly, improbably in love. “We’re so fucking getting married.”

Thursday 20:45

The door slammed shut as Phil left the room, Nick taking the now empty seat across the table. Bertie had left a few minutes ago for a meeting, and Dan steeled himself for the impending interrogation. Strangely, the prospect didn’t bother him as much as it normally would’ve, black hair and a bright smile lingering every time he closed his eyes.

Fuck.

“Now that auditions are finally finished, who did you connect with the most?” Nick asked, cutting straight to the point.

Dan hesitated. (Phil, his brain helpfully supplied in the pause. You want Phil, possibly in more ways than one. He told it to shut up.) “I don’t know. They all seemed like good candidates.”

Nick released a long suffering sigh. “The original season three of Skam was what brought it to international prominence. If we want to replicate that success in any way we need to make sure you’re comfortable with whoever plays Even. I still think Mark seems like a good choice.”

The thing was, deep down he knew Nick was right. Mark had already made a name for himself and had plenty of experience. He or someone with his background would be the obvious choice. Not some gangly eighteen year old who hadn’t acted since he was six. But even though Mark was fine and his audition had been fine there was something missing.

Auditioning for Skam was one of the first things Dan had ever done for himself, and despite living the acting dream and getting to work with his friends everyday between his success and the popularity of the show his career was becoming yet another thing he was losing control over. Picking the Even he wanted seemed in some small, pathetic way like he was taking over his life again.

There was the whisper of a laugh again, tongue poking out the side of Phil’s smile as he looked at Dan. And while he knew it was just Even looking at Isak and it didn’t mean anything, suddenly he felt more real than he had in a long time and really there was no dilemma was there?

“Phil Lester,” he said. “I felt the most chemistry with him.”

He held his breath, waiting for Nick to say something disparaging, but to his surprise the other man merely looked contemplative. “Hmm. You two did have a natural connection and your chemistry was very good, but he doesn’t have any acting experience.”

“The sign up sheet said he didn’t have to,” Dan argued. “A lot of us don’t, and that’s part of why people connect with it so much. It feels authentic--there isn’t any of the polish or glamour from the industry. And it seemed like he already really understood the character in just a few hours.”

“Okay,” Nick said, expression contorted like he was making a life or death decision and he’d chosen death. “Fine. If that’s what you want and Bertie agrees, Phil Lester can be your Even.” He narrowed his eyes, finger jabbing Dan in the chest. “But you better prove me right.”

It was ridiculous how much Dan had to fight the urge to smile. “I will,” he promised. He waited until Nick had left the room before letting his grin split his face. A laugh escaped before he could stop it, relief and adrenaline coloring it slightly hysterical. He’d done it--he’d finally found an Even.

His steps were light as he ran towards the door, knocking Carrie down the stairs where she was waiting outside with PJ. Not even the fact that it looked like they’d been talking about him was enough to dampen his mood.

PJ helped the girl to her feet, giving him a suspicious look. “What’s got you so happy?”

“Can’t I smile sometimes?” he protested.

“Not like that.”

“I agree,” Carrie chimed in. “Black clothes and gallows humor is more your style.”

Dan would be more offended, but they were kind of right. He’d known PJ and Carrie since the start of Skam, as they were two of the original cast members. PJ played Jonas, Isak’s best friend, and Carrie played Vilde, one of the main recurring female characters. By this point they’d known each other so long it was impossible to get anything past them. “I hate you both.”

She patted his back. “We love you too.”

He glared at her. “I hope you both get eaten by a moth.”

“Are you going to tell us what’s going on?” PJ interrupted, looking at him expectantly.

Part of Dan was tempted to leave them guessing, but he really was excited. “I found an Even.” A moment of stunned silence.

Carrie unfroze first. “You found an Even!” she shouted, pulling him into a hug. “That’s amazing!”

PJ clapped him on the back, more reserved but smile wide. “Who is it?”

“Phil Lester,” Dan said once Carrie had released him and he could breathe again. “He’s eighteen and from Rawtenstall. He read the hotel scene and we did yellow curtains again but it just worked this time.”

“What does he look like?”

“Tall. Like, I know I’m freakishly tall but he might be a little taller actually. Black hair, his eyes are like a blue, green, yellow shade?”

“Isak and Even together at last,” PJ said seriously. “And you and Phil really sound like you have chemistry. The sexual tension is essential.”

“What color are his eyes again?” Carrie asked innocently.

Dan rolled his eyes. “How are you and Chris getting along Carrie?” he asked pointedly. “Or PJ and--who is it you’re with now?”

“You’re deflecting,” she said. “And for the record, Chris is lovely. We haven’t spent that much time together so far but I’m sure that’ll change once we start filming.” She threw an arm around his shoulders. “Seriously though, I’m happy for you. And that my job is safe for another six months.”

It was starting to become stupid how he couldn’t stop smiling, and once the shock wore off he was sure he’d revert to his usual state of dark nothing, but for once he shut off his brain and reveled in the feeling. “Yeah, well, I’m happy for me too.” It wasn’t a lie in the slightest.

Friday 15:16

Phil was trying to pretend he wasn’t staring at his phone waiting for it to ring. His English teacher was giving a lecture about the final paper that he should probably be listening too, but instead he was staring at his empty notifications. The longer the day went on the more convinced he was that he hadn’t gotten the part. It stung more than he thought it would’ve.

He’d spent the entire day fielding questions from his friends and hiding in the bathroom, hating that he was so excited. He’d even watched the first four episodes of the original Skam last night and started the first two of Skam Britain, and found that he actually enjoyed it far more than he thought he would’ve. Granted, Dan was in the British version so he would always be slightly biased towards that, but there was definitely an appeal in the original version that made him understand its success.

His phone rang on the table beside him, vibrating against his pencil and sending it rolling to the floor. Phil ducked his head, reaching to silence it. He froze.

It was an unknown caller.

His heart leaped into his throat, chair squeaking across the tiles as he bolted for the door. The pencil would have to wait. “Sorry,” he said, pausing long enough to meet the dumbfounded expressions of his classmates. “I have to take this.” His hands were shaking as he pressed answer, sinking onto one of the benches lining the hall. “Hello?

“Is this Phil?”

“Yes?”

“This is Marie from Skam Britain. I’m calling to inform you that you’ve received the part of Even Bech Næsheim in our upcoming season. Congratulations!”

The phone clattered to the ground. Phil scrambled to recover it, his cheeks starting to hurt with the force of his grin. His brain was starting to short circuit, thoughts frozen somewhere between received the part and congratulations. “Thank you!” he blurted, elation lifting his words into something nonsensical.

Marie huffed. “You’re welcome, I guess?” she said, humor lacing her voice. “From what I can tell you’ve earned it.” Phil couldn’t bite back his smile this time at her words, and settled instead for leaning against the back of the bench and listening. “Filming starts Tuesday, but we want you and Dan to spend Sunday together if you’re available?”

“Yes!” he said, trying unsuccessfully to curb his excitement and sound professional. “That works great.”

“I’ll email you the address and more information, but welcome to the cast.”

#alt er love #ael #phan #phanfic #phanfiction #skam #skam au #phan au #actor au #fanfiction #fanfic #alternate universe

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wearecounterfeit · 6 years

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Rolling Stone Russia interviewed Jamie before Counterfeit. headed on over for their gigs. You can find the interview in Russian here.

We have a rough translation for you below:

"I apologize for the late call," Jamie begins politely, carcassing one cigarette and pulling out a new one from the pack. Behind the back of a 28-year-old actor and musician, he can see a room lit by a floor lamp with a window almost to the wall. The atmosphere is very cozy, even in the absence of curtains. - Lately, a lot has happened. On Friday, I need to be at the funeral of my friend's father - we've known each other since I was eight, and before that I rehearsed a lot. The whole group now lives together in a country house, but because of the circumstances, I had to come to London for a short time. " Jamie's hair is combed back, with a black denim jacket that reveals a light blue shirt unbuttoned over his chest. The leader of Counterfeit is visibly enlivened when I tell him that I have just returned from a short but exhausting tour with Machine Gun Kelly. "I know Kelly! - with a smile of recognition, exclaims Bower, a handsome guy with delicate features. The earring glitters in his nose. - We had dinner with him somehow, and we have a lot of common friends. He is awesome!"

How do you, the musicians, survive on long tours? I was exhausted even four days.

It always happens - you just have to go through this state. The first week is always the heaviest, your body is shocked, and then you are drawn. I always thought that the most important thing for the band is the performances, so you need to make sure that everything that happens on the tour does not interfere with them. I love touring - it's on the road that I feel most comfortable. When the tour comes to an end, I try not to notice that this is the last concert - I do not want to stop. When it all ends, it takes me about a week for a kind of decompression - I understand that I'm exhausted, and I plan to spend this time in bed eating pizza and in every way imitating a sloth. However, at some point I get an incredible itch - the same happens when we get a day off during the tour - wake up at five in the morning and realize that you do not need to play any concert - you can rest. In any case, the end of the tour always causes mixed feelings - touring is exhausting, but on the other hand, you are on the road with friends, with the family that you chose yourself - this is a bonus. We've known my guitarist Tristan from the age of eight, so we perfectly understand when we start to enrage each other. The same goes for the other members of the group, the tour manager and the technicians - they are like a family, we have known each other for a very long time, and we understand when it is necessary to shut up.

Have you watched the TV series "The Tourists "?

Kelly was in it, was he not? I read that it was closed after the first season, but did not see it. We have one guy among the staff, whose name is Peter. So, Peter is a bloody pocket rocket! You know, we are always involved in the process of loading equipment onto the site. One day I went off to smoke one cigarette, and when I came back in a couple of minutes, all my shit - and it's a lot of it - was already on the stage. Peemar - that's what we call him, - a very short guy, and I do not know how he gets up such things. The guys from our team work very hard, and without them we just could not do it. I consider it very important to maintain friendly relations with them - often you see terrible examples when the group conducts between themselves and the staff a line dividing the guys into "them" and "us". For me, it's dog shit - we all work for the same purpose.

An hour ago I spoke on the phone with Isaac Holman of Slaves , and asked if he knew your group. He said he knew the name, but he had never heard your music. What, in turn, can you say about Slaves ?

I like Slaves ! I recently discovered this band for myself, and was impressed with how just two guys with a guitar and drums can create such a dense sound. They sound very cool and damp - I like it! They also have an incredible cover on " Shutdown " Skeptics - grime is perfectly combined with punk rock. For me, so generally now there is more punk in pimp than in punk rock - they send everyone to hell and talk about real shit. That cover simply blew up the airwaves when it sounded on BBC Radio 1.

Since we're talking about Skept, then how do you like his joint track with Mick Jagger?

I have not heard yet, but in general it's very cool: Skepta and Mick Jagger, two absolute icons of different generations, together! Skept in England is indeed a cultural phenomenon - he is at the forefront of the grime scene, working with Drake, directed by Boy Better Know .

What kind of music do you like lately?

I really liked the new album [Marilyn] Manson. Amazing record - he seemed to be back in those days when I first met his work - then only the track " Fight Song " came out . And after a softer, in my opinion, " Pale Emperor " - I'm a fan of Manson, but I listened to that album a couple of times and put it aside. When I really like music - like " Heaven Upside Down " - I lose it again and again without stopping until I'm already sick of it. This is an incredibly clever record, and I really like her deep aggression.

Also recently, I was mentally returning to the time when I was fifteen - then only came "The First Impressions of Earth " The Strokes , an album that summed up my teenage period - when I first heard it, it just gave me a brain. Recently I sat down and listened to their first three albums. " Is This It " and " Room On Fire " are quite similar, but in spite of this, both there and there are great songs. The third plate of The Strokes is just gloomy - Julian Casablancas, they say, he decided then to send everything to hell - so he was tired of everything.

In addition to The Strokes and Manson, there are many friendly bands that I like, for example, The Xcerts - I'm their longtime fan. Soon the guys have a new album; they play a melodic pop-rockin 'pop-pop, but without any reproduced shit. I like the latest release of The Story So Far ; The new single The Architects , which was released a couple of months ago, is simply amazing! I'm repeating these records, but, you know, when you're doing your music and you're very involved in it, then you start missing something new - I force myself to listen to new bands and be aware of what is happening in the music world.

A really cool service for such researches is Spotify with its section "similar artists". God, is he really inaccessible in Russia? It's terrible! We also have an excellent DJ Dan Karty on BBC Radio 1, he conducts a Sunday rock show and always tries to promote new bands, which is very cool - I learned about many newcomers thanks to him. I also have a brother Sam, who listens to heavier teams. This scene is very self-contained and full of cool projects, for example, thanks to him I recently discovered for myself Worthwhile - they play something like melodic hardcore. Hell, there are so many names of genres that I'm always confused in terms!

It's very cool when you find a group at a stage when they have very few followers - listen to them, go to concerts, and when they become popular, you are "Yes, hell! I have long loved them! "

Your latest video for the song You Can’t Rely turned out pretty halloweeny. Do you celebrate this holiday?

Of course! On this day everyone seems to dress the way we look every day.

What about horror movies?

I've always loved this genre - I like even bad horror movies. In general, I like all genres, because in the end it all depends on how interesting the story is. I think that I like horrors because, including them, you know roughly in advance that you will find out: there will necessarily be a protagonist who will be saved from the devil's wicked entity, or if you are on the side of this most evil essence, you just wait, when it will all dunk.

I also like science fiction, but again, the story should emotionally entice me. This succeeds in the production of the studio Blumhouse , as well as the authorship of James Wang - this guy is just a genius. The genre of horrors, having begun the way from a distant shelf, has strongly advanced in that to force spectators to perceive it seriously.

I have not seen the new " Blade Runner " yet, but I've heard a lot of good things about it. Did you like the movie? I'm a fan of the first part and I understand the general tension that arises every time a remake or a continuation of the classics is shot. Imagine that someone decided to remake your favorite record twenty years later in the spirit of "The album is excellent, but I want to write down my version." A natural reaction to this will be: "Wait, do you really think that this is a hell of a need? Maybe we'll leave it as it is? "This approach has to be resisted internally, and I'm looking forward to the moment when I can see" Blade Runner 2049 "- after all, it's a sequel, not a remake.

In one of the interviews you said that the engine of your creativity - both texts and music - is anger and aggression. With age, people usually become a bit calmer - what do you think will move you in the future?

You know, I once suppressed aggression - in the period from fifteen to twenty-five, but then I realized how it happens to many, that all these emotions are equally necessary in life - they are needed for the senses. In our first album, the malice I mentioned is not a reflection of my current state at that time, but rather there is my retrospective view of life. I believe that most of the art is born out of pain, and for me, as an artist, the pain is a powerful moving force - it concerns both songs and poems and some artistic scribbles (I'm not an artist, but I tried to draw). I do not know what will inspire me in the future - now we are starting to quietly work on a new album, and a lot of ideas are in the air. Usually I take as a basis one idea or written down on a line and build music around it - from this everything is born. It is important to establish an inner connection with yourself and pull out the words that you want to express, and also surround yourself with inspiring people. The new album will definitely have a lot of pain again - I do not know what will inspire me this time, but something definitely should - otherwise the record will turn out to be damn boring!

Say, and your name was never pronounced as "Bowie"?

Damn, no! Although I'm fucking waiting for such a case - I would like that when you check into the hotel, someone thinks I'm his son. By the way, my father's name is David - he will have to ask this question.

#interviews #counterfeit

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boycottphil · 6 years

Text

Blue Neighbourhood (My Youth Is Yours) - Chapter 2

Summary: Dan and Phil come from two different worlds. Dan’s family is poor and fighting to survive each day, while Phil was born with a silver spoon in his mouth. They do have one thing in common that keeps them together for many years to come: they’ve both been neglected and left to fend for themselves.

In this alternative universe, Dan and Phil are going through the joys, pains and confusions of childhood and teenage years; in which they discover themselves, their families and the people around them.

Rating: Teen and up (for now)

Word count: 3159 Chapter: 03/?

Read on AO3!

<- Last chapter | Beginning | Next chapter ->

Chapter Two: Together

Dan’s home was small. It was an average-looking house with a beige exterior and hardly anything else to go for it. The front door looked as if it would fall off its hinges at any given moment. One of the windows on the top floor was obviously broken, with grey plastic covering it from the inside to keep out rain. The only thing on the whole property that was prettier than anything else was a large oak tree in the backyard that towered over the house, making it look tiny in comparison.

Even with its falling exterior and junk in both the front and the back of the house, Dan never thought that it wasn’t homey. He was used to the clutter and the mess, he was used to squeaky doors and windows, to wooden floors that threatened to cause splintered feet. He never thought that he had it worse than any other kid. He had all that he needed, even if he recognised that he sometimes wanted that new toy everyone had, or that new video game everyone was playing.

It was a Sunday, but even on a Sunday, the Howell house was empty. Dan’s mother worked two jobs, and working Sundays paid better than working any other day of the week. Dan’s father sometimes left for days at a time. Dan never knew where he went, why he left or when he would be coming back. When he wasn’t out of town, he was sitting in the living room, a husk of a man, looking blankly at the turned on TV with a can of beer in his hands.

His parents weren’t perfect. Dan was aware. He knew his mother struggled with juggling two jobs, two kids. Two kids who were nowhere near ready to go out into the world, and wouldn’t be for years to come.

But everything was good. Even if Dan was left home alone, left to cook himself a meal and clean up after everyone, as he was the only one with the time to do so, he thought that everything was good. His family wasn’t perfect. But it was a good family.

On Sunday, Dan had a whole plan. He woke up whenever he wanted, since his mum wasn’t around to drag him out of bed for school or other responsibilities. He had his favourite cereal for breakfast, and sometimes even some extra sweets if he found any. He then sat in front of the TV until at least 2 or 3 in the afternoon, cleaning between shows and during ads. When he got bored of television, he cooked his mother and little brother a meal, then set it aside for when they would come home.

It was 4 in the afternoon on that cloudy Sunday when Dan remembered that he promised his new friend that he would be coming around again. He picked up his backpack, noting that there was a small hole in the bottom of it that he should patch up later. Band-aids, some water and a snack were carefully packed into the backpack, this time a flashlight as well. Dan grabbed his house key to lock the house up before he hopped on his bike.

He had fun, the previous day. Phil was a good boy. He knew how to have fun, even if he was a bit strange at first. Even if his family was a bit strange.

Whose family wasn’t strange?

The brown-haired boy was in the “rich” part of town within half an hour, panting a bit as he hopped off his bike and looked up at the by now familiar house. Compared to his own, this pristine-looking house, built probably not too long ago, or renovated at least, looked like a proper mansion for royalty. Dan wondered if they had a huge foyer with a chandelier made out of beautiful crystals… Or perhaps an indoor pool, with a slide?

Like the previous day, Dan scanned all the windows, hoping that this time he would see a pair of blue eyes peeking from one of the white curtains. He gave it a minute, then walked between the houses and looked into the backyard.

Phil was sitting on the porch, Lion positioned so he sat on Phil’s lap. The boy was looking out toward the forest, his blue eyes reflecting the woods in a way that made them appear to almost be green. A deep green-blue. Dan didn’t make his presence known yet. He noticed that the boxes were gone and that a swing set was set up in the opposite corner, and most of the flowers that were previously in pots had been planted.

“Hello, Phil,” he greeted, keeping his voice rather meek. He was afraid that he would startle the other.

“Dan,” Phil smiled, getting up and taking Lion by the paw as he walked over to the fence. “Hey. How are you?” The ginger-haired boy asked, probably to be polite.

Dan couldn’t help but notice the suit he was wearing. His tie was a bit crooked, but its pretty azure colour caught Dan’s attention. “Are you going somewhere?” He asked, some disappointment evident in his voice.

“No, we just came back from church a while ago.” Phil looked over his shoulder. He was glad that his mother seemed to already be too busy with work to pay attention to where he was. “I was actually waiting for you.” He admitted, looking back at Dan.

“Oh,” Dan breathed out, then he, too, glance at the open door leading into the house. “Can you come play?” He asked, knowing that the previous day, the other boy was forced to cut the time they spent together short.

Phil shook his head, and it was all Dan needed to feel defeated. He was hoping they could continue their game. He had been up late the previous night, thinking of strategies to get some of Phil’s “treasure.” They were ninja pirates, after all, and they needed to protect their territory and steal what isn’t rightfully theirs. Dan had hoped that they could build some more stuff together, maybe even explore the other end of the woods.

“But-!” Phil started, as soon as he saw the disappointment wash over Dan’s face. “We can play here.” He said, biting his lips. He didn’t seem too sure if that was true.

“Really?”

“I-I can ask…” he added softly, then took a step back from the fence.

“Wait. What if I can’t stay?” Dan looked down at the ground again. He didn’t want to go home. He really didn’t.

Phil shrugged, then finally stepped back and turned to climb up onto the porch. He was gone for a few minutes, and Dan began to wonder if the other boy would even becoming back. He was just about to take his bike again and leave when Phil reemerged from within his home and smile at Dan brightly.

“You can stay to play!” Dan saw that Phil had changed out of the suit he was wearing and was now dressed in a tee with a cartoonish purple T-rex on it as well as some simple black sweats.

“Awesome.” Dan grinned back and put his bike away, then walked around to the gate, which Phil opened for him and let him into his backyard.

Dan saw Phil’s mother poke her head out briefly. He frowned when she saw who her son was going to play with, but she did not say a word.

The two boys spend hours playing. Phil brought out his toys, making Dan feel just a little bit envious. But that feeling wasn’t about to ruin anything for him. They each picked their own action figure and were soon “battling” against each other.

It was late in the afternoon, the sun would begin to set anytime soon. Phil’s mother came out of the house, watching for a few minutes before she spoke up.

“I think that’s enough for today.” She said coldly, and even as the smiles fell from both of the boys’ faces, she remained stone cold.

“But mum-” Phil began.

“No. I’m sorry, love. Your friend has to go.”

Dan put down the figure he had been playing with and stood up. He grabbed his backpack off the ground and dusted it off. It was still dirty, but that’s just how it was.

“That’s okay, Phil. I had fun.” Dan said and smiled down at his new friend. Phil soon stood up as well and nodded, though he was not happy at all. Dan thought he could guess what the reason behind the frowning was.

“I’ll see you... “ Phil didn’t finish that sentence on purpose.

“Tomorrow?” The other boy perked up a bit as Dan suggested.

“Yeah, tomorrow.” He then leaned closer to Dan and whispered. “Mum and dad are gone until 4. We can go to the forest again.” He then pulled back and smiled brightly.

Dan briefly wondered how Phil could be both so full of sunshine and rain all at once.

“Okay, bye, Phil. Goodbye, Mrs….” He looked at Phil, as if asking for his surname.

“Lester.”

“Goodbye Mrs. Lester. Thank you for letting me stay.” He then walked out the gate, not looking at the woman as he grabbed his bike and slowly drove off.

Dan didn’t go home right away. He decided to drive around for a while. He had time. His mother and brother wouldn’t be home until very late, and he had nothing to do. Nothing good was on TV and he had no chores he wanted or had to do. He felt the weight of being alone. It felt as if someone had put rocks into his backpack and was forcing him to ride up a steep hill. He didn’t like the feeling.

With Phil around, it felt as if that weight didn’t ever exist.

He came across a park, not too far away from his home. He could see a group of boys, older than him by at least a couple of years, playing basketball.

The urge to run over and ask if he could play, too, was strong with Dan, but he merely sat down on one of the benches and took out the bottle of water and the snack he packed for himself. The sun was slowly beginning to dip under the horizon, casting long shadows on the ground, the light around the whole park turning a gentle orange. Dan wished he could have spent that time with a friend.

“Daniel, where have you been?” Dan heard his mother ask, no real concern in her voice. She knew that the 11 year old could take care of himself well enough. He was mature for his age.

“I was playing with Phil.” He answered simply, putting his backpack down on the ground and heading into the kitchen. His mother was sat down at the table, a lit cigarette held loosely between her pale fingers. Dan’s nose scrunched up at the familiar scent of tobacco. He was used to it by now, but after spending a day outside in the fresh air, he did not appreciate the foul scent.

“Phil?” He heard his mother ask, an eyebrow cocked in curiosity. Despite the bags under her eyes and the tired paleness of her skin, her chocolate brown eyes were still warm as she looked at her son.

“Yeah!” Dan said with enthusiasm, sitting down at the kitchen table and starting to animatedly describe Phil and all the fun he had had with the boy in the short time he had known him. From their games at the garbage dump to their rather quiet hours spent playing with Phil’s toys. Dan’s mum had a soft smile on her lips as she listened intently to her son.

“I’m happy that you found a friend like Phil, love.” He extinguished her cigarette and then put the food Dan had made for her and Adrian into the microwave. “Does he go to your school?”

“I don’t know. He moved in not too long ago.”

“So he’s new in town.”

“I guess so. They moved into a huge house.”

Dan’s mum hummed to let Dan know that she was listening.

“His mum doesn’t like me.”

She looked over at Dan, her smile falling. “Why do you think that?”

“She doesn’t like it that I play with Phil.” He thought back on the looks she was sending in Dan’s direction. The judging way she scrunched up her nose in what must be disgust whenever he touched anything that belong to Phil- or even Phil himself.

“...Some people are like that, honey. As long as Phil is nice to you, I don’t see a reason why it should matter whether his mum likes you or not.” Dan could only nod at that. He knew he shouldn’t care. But he saw how Phil reacted. How his head hung a bit lower every time he noticed his mum looking over at them.

“I guess. I’m gonna go read.” Dan pushed his chair away from the table. He hear his mum say a soft ‘okay, have fun’ before he closed the kitchen door and went to the bathroom. He took a shower and brushed his teeth before slipping into the room he shared with Adrian.

His brother was in the living room, judging by the sounds of some cartoon coming from said room. Dan sighed, climbing into his own bed and taking out a book to read. He could hardly concentrate. It was a strange day. But at least it felt like summer.

Dan kept meeting up with Phil every day. They would either go to the forest or explore the neighbourhood. They were inseparable. They spent every minute of every day together, as much as they could and were allowed to. Dan learnt that Phil’s parents weren’t home much, and even when they were, they were working. Usually, there was a nanny to take care of Phil. An older woman who had apparently been a family friend for a long time.

He also learnt that Phil has a brother who is three years older than him. Dan did ask why he had never seen Martyn. But Phil just shrugged and avoided the question for a few days, until he said that Martyn went to a boarding school, and was in America with some school friends on a summer-long trip.

Perhaps it was envy or maybe melancholy that he saw in Phil’s eyes. Whatever it was, it told him not to talk about Martyn too much.

Summer was slowly coming to an end. Dan had been so busy with just being around Phil that he didn’t even notice that in less than 3 weeks, they would be going right back to school. To hell, as Dan loved to call it.

“Phil?” They were sitting on a bench in a park near Phil’s home. Phil had sneaked out once again, because he always did that with Dan. Even if he got in trouble at least a few times when his mum noticed that his shoes were muddier than they were supposed to be.

“Yes?” The blue-eyed boy asked, turning his gaze away from some pigeon that had gathered around a woman who was feeding them some crumbs.

“What school do you go to?”

Phil thought for a moment. He had to remember the name. “St. Willow Secondary School.” He said after almost a full minute of thinking.

“That’s the same school I go to!” He wasn’t too keen to go to that school. Although it was a new school, as he is starting year 7, the change will be minimal. Teachers and a new building aside, not much changes. He’s going to be with the same kids. Their town isn’t exactly large. He’s happier this time around though.

Phil will be there, too.

“That’s great!” Phil chuckled, nudging Dan with his shoulder. They were sat rather closely together. It felt nice, comfortable. Just being in close proximity. They didn’t yet officially declare that they are best friends, but both of them knew it.

“I will finally have someone to spend lunch with!” Dan laughed, and Phil joined in after saying a small ‘me too’.

They fell into comfortable silence, both boys happy.

The first day of school was always difficult. Not only did it mean that he had to wear a uniform again, but it also meant that he had to get used to studying and listening and just waking up every morning. The only thing he was looking forward to was the fact that now he could be with Phil, every day. Maybe not as much as they were during summer, but he could at the very least look forward to something.

The beginning of a new school year meant something else, as well. It meant that Dan’s mum spent a lot of money on his uniform, his books, his supplies… And while she said that it was fine (she didn’t even have a choice, anyway), it was obvious that there was some stress around spending so much money all of a sudden. Dan couldn’t help but think a bit bitterly how Phil does not have such a problem.

After the welcoming ceremony, they were all told to find their classes and start the day. Dan had yet to see Phil, but he had gone through two classes already, both of which didn’t start on anything important yet. The usual get-to-know the teacher and students spiel was going on, and Dan already knew 99% of everyone in his classes. He was eager for lunch to come around so he could maybe, hopefully, find Phil.

Ten minutes into lunch break and Dan finally stumbled upon Phil. They shared stories of their days so far as they made their way to the canteen. Dan got his free lunch, and Phil had one packed from home. They sat down in a secluded corner, not wanting to be bothered by anyone at all. Dan used to hang out with some boys from his old school, but he didn’t find them. He knew that they were somewhere.

Lunch passed in what felt like seconds, and the two had to get up and continue their day. Dan was less than eager. He could only really see Phil during breaks and what’s about it. At the very least, he figured, he had the older boy’s schedule and they could meet up between classes, even if it was for only a minute or two to say hello.

Dan didn’t mind. He was okay with it. At least he had someone to be around. With Phil around, there would be no problems. With Phil around, even the bullies wouldn’t matter too much. Because at the end of the day, he didn’t have to go home and hope that the following day would be better.

He could go to his friend who would tell him that the following day would be better.

#phan #phanfiction #phanfic #daniel howell #amazingphil #danisnotonfire #phil lester #dnp #dan and phil #mine #fanfiction

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