#I have fuckin auto save on
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I lost my painting
#I started a chara painting based off one of my mutuals fan songs for them#and I was making some real leeway on it but I think the file corrupted#I have fuckin auto save on#man
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#im gonna fucking kill myself im so fucking angry#i gotta go to work in like 30 minutes and im so fuckin pissed off at a video game#baldurs gate has gotten more auto saves since the game launched but you what doesnt fucking autosave?#the entire fucking gauntlet of shar apparently#i killed the orthon explored the whole fucking temple got all the way to the shadowfell and remembered i forgot the halsin shit#so i went back to do that#and lost that stupid fight and apparently at no point in that like entire hour and a half did anything save#and im too fucking stupid to save it on my own#so now i gotta redo everything#im so fucking pissed#cause the gauntlet of shar is actively my least favorite part of the game cause its boring and annoying and more importantly#this isnt the first fucking time ive had to do this#ive had game crashes and other fuckups that have made me redo that entire area#multiple times#youd think id fucking learn my god damn lesson but no#im so angry right now how am i supposed to go to work like this#wasted my fuckin morning#i hate video games
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#ik its my own fault for not saving but games that dont have auto save and also dont have save points my beloathed#i WILL forget to save for 87 hours#anyway rip my mega level digimon Sachi and Sorcha lost forever to the ether bc i raised them to mega in 4 hours and then my game crashed#im less mad about that and more mad about all the fuckin plot i have to redo tho lmao#i got a not insignificant amount of things done and now i have to do it all again 😶🌫️#i am however mad thay the biyomon i raised after somehow not rage quitting and getting back on the grind be ame a redveedramon#while i was shooting for and all on board to get birdramon#fucming ugly dinosaur#its fine i will love wretched and unwanted child anyway
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AUGH
#Ravage.txt#me: alright stormreign let’s settle ‘ere fo th night#stormreign: neigh#me: ugh someone’s riding by and i can’t set up camp. let’s trot down a little#us: *trotting*#me hearing ominous howling: IS THAT THE GRIM REAPE—#us: *go flailing off a rock ledge that definitely should not have nearly killed us sr is galloping away my revolver isn’t doing instant kill#headshots i am violently torn open by four wolves*#me reloading the game: mannn i lost the ram and rabbit i ran over too :(#that was super embarrassing i was trying to gallop away but it was so dark and on a mountain so i tripped when i meant to jump and we fuckin#died because of it 😭 and the game auto saved right before we encountered the pack too weeeh#i was only out there to hunt the grizzly :((( i like trail rides too much i have done 0 quests#also a woman was screaming for help saying she was kidnapped so i. shot her kidnapper and she called me crazy and galloped off and then a#witness rode towards me in the opposite direction she ran and saw me dump the body behind a boulder so i had to kill him too :/ threw them#both over a hill. that happened with another lady i rescued who was wailing about her abusive husband. idk maybe i should’ve just hogtied#them and going straight for the gun isn’t a good approach but it’s kinda making me feel useless? i love helping people in games and i really#tried doing that and the result was a $5 bounty on my ass for the first woman rescued and an innocent man dead for the second :/ might just#ignore them from now on tbh like what’s the point if there’s just more suffering as a result of my intervention
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Okay I’m obsessed with this idea of Lip as stay at home dad. Like the way he’d be just so on top of things. Like imagine he has his wife who works Monday-Friday as litigation attorney wife (yes I’m self indulging a bit 😅🤭) like I think it’s just the cutest thing. Like she has a photo of him and the kids at her office and he’d be so proud of her like THATS MY WIFE energy.
i think at the beginning he'd feel so inferior staying at home. he's never in his life been around someone (besides sheila but that's different lol) who got to stay at home and not work. he just has never grew up that way, and it feels so insane for him to do.
"i can pay debbie to watch them for cheap, and i'll go to work too."
"why would you do that? just save us the money and stay home?"
it's a little emasculating to him at first. his wife the breadwinner feels wrong to him (it's lip ok). he's still got a touch of his own fragile masculinity until he talks to mickey out of all people.
"it's the fukin' best gallagher."
"yeah? really?"
"fuck yeah." mickey scoffs. "get to stay home with the kids. make sure no one's fuckin' with 'em. sleep in. don't have to deal with assholes out in the real world."
he'd do it, and really enjoy it, but he'd definitely have a saturday and some night shift jobs through the week at the auto shop. just so he feels a little more in control, not completely dependent on you (for his own sanity and sake).
#thebearer#bearblahs#lip gallagher#lip gallagher x reader#lip gallagher fluff#dad!lip gallagher x mom!reader#dad!lip gallagher#mickey milkovich#shamless us#shameless#shameless fluff
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Not My Sister's Keeper Pt. 3
Roman X OC(Kara)
Jey Uso X OC (Tia)
Rating: 18+
Warning: Smut; sex, fluff, couple arguing, Jealousy, infidelity, pregnancy
Roamn’s wife recently left medical school and returned home to save her marriage. Upon her return, she finds out things are not what they seem. Her sister is pregnant by her best friend Jey Uso, who is also Roman’s cousin, and her husband is acting suspicious.
What happens when a conversation overhead on a baby monitor blows her world apart?
Kara's Parent's Guest House
Kara's POV
“What the hell do you mean your water broke!” I exclaimed as Tia screamed in pain.
Is this really happening, she’s in labor.
Switching to auto pilot I helped Tia over to the couch to lay down .
“Are ya’ll alright down here I saw Jey leaving and he looked upset?” my dad asked pausing at the door.
“She’s in labor, call an ambulance,” I said as my dad called 911.
“Where is mom? I need her,” Tia moaned as dad held her hand.
“She had to go get your brother, his flight just got in,” dad said as I tried to time Tia’s contractions.
“Another one is coming!” Tia screamed as I frowned. That was too close to be having contractions.
“How long have you been hurting?” Dad asked as Tia grunted through another contraction.
“Since this morning but I wanted to have my baby shower, it wasn’t as intense earlier.” She moaned shook my head.
“You always do stuff that don’t make sense! Ugh,just breath and lay back until the ambulance comes,” I said trying to put aside my differences for the moment.
Logan being born safely was all I cared about at that moment.
“I feel like I need to push!” she cried as I reached down to check her and felt the top of the baby’s head.
This bitch really done sat here in labor all fuckin’ day….
“My daughter said she feels like she has to push, should she do it?” my dad asked putting the phone on speaker.
“Dad the baby’s coming I can feel the top of her head,” I said, totally overwhelmed as Tia screamed in pain.
This had to be some cruel joke…I’m really about to deliver Roman’s baby…His baby with my sister…
“Ok, looks like this baby ain’t waiting, I’m going to need you to get some towels, scissors and something to tie around the umbilical cord. There is a traffic jam, and we are about thirty minutes out,” the operator said my heart began to race.
“This isn’t happening right now,” I whispered trying to help Tia get comfortable as dad gathered the needed items.
“I’m so sorry Kara,” Tia cried as I tried to keep my emotions bottled up but couldn’t stop my tears.
“Look, Logan needs your help. You gotta push with all you got,” I whispered trying to keep my mind on what was important right now.
“Here is the stuff,” dad said placing the items beside me as we waited for nature to take its course.
“When the baby comes out, I need someone to tie that string about a half an inch up before you cut the umbilical. Now when another contraction hits, I need mama to push as hard as she can,” the operator said as we all listened intently to her not wanting to miss anything.
“Here it comes. Ahhh!” Tia screamed pushing with all her might as my niece’s head eased into my hands.
“Oh, I got her head, it’s out!” I cried. “Come on and push Tia!” I shouted, as she screamed pushing once again.
“It’s burning! Get her out! Please, get her out!” she yelled and with one final push, my niece made her entrance into the world, but there was no noise….. No crying.
“She’s out,” my dad cried to the operator as I tied off the cord as instructed and cut the umbilical cord in a hurry.
“Why isn’t she crying?” Tia whimpered as I tried not to panic.
“Come on Logan…… Breath baby,” I whispered trying to clear her airway, gently rubbing her back but she wasn’t moving.
“Kara, what’s happening!” My dad yelled as I began CPR.
“It’s my karma for everything I’ve done!” Tia cried as I tuned her out. This was about Logan right now, not her fucking guilt.
“Breathe, Logan. Come on, breathe for Tee Tee,” I begged blowing air into her tiny mouth.
“Ya’ll please hurry the baby’s not beathing,” my dad pleaded as I took two fingers and began compressions counting in my head.
“Logan, mommy loves you. Please……. Just breathe.”
Once again, I blew some air into her tiny lungs. The powerful cry that spilled from her lips, lifted my heart as she wailed, her little face scrunched up as her tiny hands moving against my face.
“That’s it baby girl, breathe,” I cried, wrapping her up in the blanket, before placing her on Tia’s chest.
“My baby…… My Logan,” Tia cried as a momentarily wave of relief washed over me, Logan was ok.
“Ambulance is almost here, you did so good baby,” my dad said as I nodded moving away from my sister and niece.
I felt the walls closing in as I observed her with the baby. That was my dream, and she took it from me.
“Kara, look at her,” Tia whispered as they did skin to skin.
“I see her, she’s beautiful” I whispered as my dad kneeled beside her.
Her tiny face, a mirror image of her daddy’s baby picture that proudly hung up in our home.
I turned away as the EMT’s came in, wiping my tears. I needed to leave, and in a hurry, this was too much.
I turned back around to watch the EMT’s check over my niece. I had to be sure before I left.
“Baby’s vitals are good, and lungs are clear. Now we need to check mom, can someone take the baby for a few minutes,” one of the EMT’s asked as Tia looked at me.
“Take her Kara, she needs her auntie,” she whispered as I shook my head in shock and disbelief.
“Was she serious? She really was trying to manipulate me to hold the baby….
“I can’t and you know why Tia…..” I whispered as she wiped her tears.
“We can put this behind us, please….. Kara, just hold her, please…Just look at her, she needs you in her life,” Tia pleaded as I sick to my stomach at her weak attempt to manipulate me.
I couldn’t do it, I would never be able to look at that tiny little face and not see my husband and my sister’s betrayal.
“She doesn’t need me….She needs her dad, and I hope you allow Roman a chance to be that,” I said looking at my niece.
“Roman?” What are you talkin’ about sweetheart?” my dad asked as I smiled sadly at him.
“I’m sure when everything settles, they will explain it, I just can’t right now.” I whispered, giving him a hug. I was done with it all. I then leaned over and kissed my niece gently on the forehead.
“I love you Logan, always remember that,” I whispered as she opened her eyes and looked directly at me.
“Kara, I’m so sorry,” Tia cried as ignored her and left.
Walking back to my car I felt numb, and I knew nothing would ever be the same again.
----
Roman’s & Kara’s Home
Roman’s POV
“Where the fuck is she?” I muttered pacing the living room. I hadn’t heard from Kara in hours and now I couldn’t get Tia either.
Had Kara heard us on the baby monitor?…God, I hoped not, I wanted to tell her for myself.
“You really fucked everything up, all you had to do was kick her out of your room that night,” I whispered to myself pouring me a shot of brandy.
11 Months ago
“You said you understood Roman and that we would make time for each other,” Kara said as I felt the tension between us building.
“I do, I just didn’t think it would be this hard to be without you,” I said peering through the door at Tia getting into the bottom bunk.
She had come to me after her match and said her ride had left early and asked could she ride with me to the next city.
I saw no harm in it, so I told her sure. I didn’t tell Kara though; I knew they fell in and out too much and I didn’t want to cause no argument.
“Are you still coming to spend the week with me next week?” Kara asked as I smiled.
“Yea, I’m taking the jet after my last house show. Maybe you can show be around up there,” I said as she smiled brightly at me.
“I would love to,” she said with a yawn.
“A’ight I kept you up long enough, go to bed and dream about me,” I said as she blushed.
“I always do, love you,” she whispered as I smiled. “Same here beautiful, and I love you more. Call me after you get outta class in the morning,” I said as we said our goodbyes.
Turning off the light, I went to bed but sometime later I felt the other side of the bed dip beside me. Startled, I turned over and there lying next to me was Tia…..Naked.
“What you doin’ in here Tia?” I asked as she straddled my waist, a strangled moan escaped my lips as her bare pussy rubbed against my dick.
“Giving you what you’ve been missing,” she moaned slowly moving against me as I groaned stilling her hips.
“Don’t do that, you know I’m with Kara.”
“She isn’t here, and I know you need it Roman. I won’t tell, I promise,” she whispered her face mere inches from mine, my heart racing as I saw for the first time how much she really did favor Kara.
“We can’t,” I moaned as she slowly stroked my dick.
“Yes, we can,” she moaned against my lips, placing my dick at her entrance slowly takin it until I was buried to the hilt.
“Fuck, we can’t,” I hissed as she began to bounce slowly with a smirk. “Then stop me,” she moaned, as my eyes closed in pleasure as she bounced.
Giving in, I gripped her hips meeting her thrusts as she screamed.
“Mmm, yes! That’s what I wanted,” she moaned as I willed my eyes open to look at her as she bounced on my dick with a purpose.
“Kara! Fuck!” I moaned as Tia smirked. “Oh…..So, you want me to be Kara, huh?” she asked.
“Tia, this is a mistake, we gotta stop,” I rasped, sitting up as she kissed me again.
“It’s ok….I promise…I’ll be Kara for you…I’ll be whatever you need me to be Roman.” she moaned and in that moment there was no turning back.
And that was the first encounter….On my bus, fantasizing she was Kara as we had sex.
“I’m so fuckin’ stupid,” I growled truly regretting my choices. Picking up my phone, I called Kara with it once again, no answer.
“Kara where you at baby?”
Kara’s POV
With a heavy heart I stared at the home Roman, and I’ve shared as husband and wife for five years. The bus where a lot of his infidelity took place, parked beside the garage made my stomach turn.
Anger radiating off of me, I reached into my bag and pulled out the knife I had brought with me earlier to cut Tia’s cake.
“I decorated this fuckin bus and I picked out this motherfucka,” I quietly hissed to myself, stabbing the tires one by one, leaving one untouched. “Had her slutty ass up in here,” I muttered, failing to reel in my emotions, I was too hurt but I knew I needed to calm down.
“Get it together Kara, calm down and just see if he’s going to tell you,” I muttered giving myself a pep talk.
I put the knife back in my bag, laying it down beside the bus before I went around to the side door. As I went into the kitchen, I spotted him pacing in the living room sipping on a glass of Brandy.
“Nasty son of a bitch,” I muttered, taking a deep breath before I made my way into the living room.
“Kara, I was worried baby, where you been?” Roman asked sitting down his drink as I cleared my throat, walking a little closer to him.
“Um, I was at my parents, then Tia stopped by with Jey,” I said staring a hole through him as was oblivious.
“Oh….Well, you could have returned my calls or texts baby, I thought something had happened. I’m glad you were at your folks though,” he said nervously as I gave him a small smile that didn’t quite reach my eyes.
“I was busy….Tia went into labor, Roman,” I said watching his facial expressions. He looked excited then cleared his throat stopping himself.
This asshole, how could I have been so fuckin’ dumb?”
“Uh, did everything go ok?” he asked, trying to be indifferent as I nodded.
“Well, Tia had a trying afternoon. The ambulance didn’t make it in time, so I had to deliver the baby, but they’re both fine,” I said casually as Roman seemed shocked but happy.
“You….You delivered the baby? That is crazy,” he said as I nodded in agreement.
“Yea, it was crazy..Damn near like I was in the twilight zone,” I said studying his body language, knowing at any moment I was going to fucking snap.
“Wow that’s great, little Logan is here,” he whispered, a small smile etched on his face before he slipped back into his stoic expression.
“Yes, she’s here, so congratulations Roman…..You and my sister have a beautiful, healthy baby girl,” I said calmy as his looked at me as if I had shot him in the heart.
The disbelief on his face as he processed the fact that I knew his secret was something I will never forget.
Taking a deep breath and exhaling, he bent down placing his hands on his knees, he looked sick honestly.
“What’s wrong Roman? You look like you can’t breathe.”
“Kara”
“What you gotta say?…Kara, what!?” I yelled trying to keep my tears at bay, backing away as he reached for me.
“W- Who told you? Was it Tia?” Roman asked as I chuckled at the gall of him.
“You both told me actually,” I said, his eyes widening in realization.
“The bab-……You heard us on the baby monitor.” He stammered, his eyes full of unshed tears.
“Yea, imagine my surprise to find out my husband is not only sleeping with my sister but got her pregnant. Damn, we’re a fucked-up Steve Wilkos episode waiting to happen,” I said, my voice full of sarcasm.
Honestly, it was that or being a hysterical mess, but I was well on my way to losing my shit.
“I’m so sorry Kara, I didn’t mean for this to happen. Please, believe me baby,” Roman pleaded as I felt my heart breaking even more.
“You’re sorry you got caught! Like who are you?!” I cried as he lowered his head in shame.
“Just tell me what I can do to make it right please?” Roman pleaded as I looked at him in disbelief as he sank to his knees pulling me to him, burying his head against my stomach, his arms holding me tight.
“Let me go Roman,” I whimpered trying to unlock his arms from around my waist as he held me tighter.
“No baby, I can’t let you go…Just tell me what you need, I’ll do anything. What do you need me to do?” Roman begged as tears fell from his eyes.
“What do I need you to do?” I sobbed, prying his hands from around my waist.
“Yes, what do you need?…..Please, Just tell me what can I do to help us get through this, I love you.” Roman pleaded holding my hands in his, still on his knees, his remorseful gaze, pulling at my heartstrings but there was no coming back from this…Ever.
“Well, I’ll tell you, Roman…I’ll tell you what you can do for me,” I said as he waited with bated breath, his eyes pleading for forgiveness.
“You can go straight to hell,” I said calmy, snatching my hands away, leaving him in the living room, my mind on autopilot.
“Kara…Kara! Don’t do this,” I heard him plead as I walked into our bedroom ripping the comforter off the bed.
“I don’t want you here!” I shouted as Roman stood at the doorway looking almost scared to come in our bedroom…As he fucking should be.
“Kara, calm down.” Ignoring him, I ripped the fitted sheet off the bed laying it out on the floor. I wanted…No, needed him out of here before I did something I will regret.
“Let’s just talk please, I never meant to hurt you.”
“What is the point? It ain’t nothing else to talk about, you had a baby with my sister!” I exclaimed, grabbing some of his clothes out of the closet, throwing them on top of the sheet.
“I know I fucked up bad, but this can’t be it,” Roman said as I grabbed a couple pair of his shoes throwing them on top of his clothes.
“All these fuckin’ shoes, what you trying to do, start a shoes company? If you put this much effort into this marriage as you do shit like this, we wouldn’t be here now!” I ranted as Roman grabbed my hands.
“I do care about us! I know I hurt you baby, and I know how much you love me-” Roman started as I snatched away, slapping the fuck outta him.
“I obviously don’t know you Roman!” I cried, moving around the room throwing what I could of his on top of the sheet.
“You do know me, I’m your husband! You didn’t do anything wrong baby, I fucked up-” Roman said, his words stopping me in my tracks.
“You don’t think I did anything wrong? Really…Really….Marrying a selfish asshole and believing in him, when he obviously didn’t deserve it!” I shouted.
“Baby-”
“Putting off my MEDICAL SCHOOL plans for you!” I cried, really pissed thinking about the sacrifices I made for our marriage.
“Aye, I didn’t make you leave school in Boston,” he said pissing me off even more.
“Nah, you right you…I did that because you made it seem like it was an inconvenience for our marriage, and I wanted to be with my husband and save my marriage.
“I wanted that too!” Roman shouted as I scoffed. “No, you didn’t because you were too busy fucking my sister. That’s why you could never come see me in Boston,” I said as Roman rubbed his temples in frustration.
“Kara, It only happened a couple times and I am so sorry, if I could take it ba-”
“It should have never happened! I screamed, slapping him again, causing him to stagger as he Rubbed the side of his face.
“Just let me explain, please, I love you,” he whispered taking me in his arms, grasping my chin, trying to get me to look at him.
“I DON’T BELIEVE YOU!!.............And I never will again,” I whimpered, snatching away from Roman.
“You don’t mean that Kara.”
Ignoring him, I tied the ends of the sheets together, making a makeshift suitcase, throwing it over my shoulder, and walked out of our bedroom.
“Kara, don't do anything rash," Roman said as I made my way through the house, the makeshift suitcase thrown over my shoulder, only stopping to pick up his bottle of Brandy, and lighter before storming out the house.
The look of shock on his face as he saw the flattened tires on the bus was almost comical.
“Too late, I already did,” I said pointing at the flat tires as he sighed.
“Look, I don’t care about the tires, Let’s just go back in the house. I just wanna make sure you’re ok and then I’ll leave Kara.”
“Oh…You wanna make sure I’m ok? Well……Let’s see, in the course of a damn day I’ve lost my sister who wasn’t much of a sister to begin with anyway, my husband and my pride,” I said as Roman stepped closer to me.
“Baby, you ain’t lost your sister or me.”
“Don’t!……Don’t patronize me!" I yelled, throwing his clothes in the middle of the driveway, and dousing them with the bottle of Brandy, before going back over to my bag, pulling out a can of spray paint.
“What you doin’ wit that Kara?” Roman asked as I scoffed at him.
“I helped design this fuckin’ bus, and you out here fuckin’ dat bitch in it! You got me fucked up!” I yelled spray-painting the words “Adulterer" and "cheater” across the side.
“You takin’ it too far, Kara! First the tires, and now this!” Roman yelled finally snapping, grabbing the can from me as I pushed him away.
“Oh, I ain’t took it far enough, Roman," I said reaching in my pocket, igniting his clothes and shoes on fire with his own lighter.
“Got Damn it, now that’s it!..Let’s go in the house before somebody calls the police!” Roman yelled, trying to carry me back in the house as I fought against him.
“Put me down! Put me down Roman, I hate you!” I screamed as he continued to carry me towards the house.
“Will you calm the fuck down!”
Jey’s POV
“Uce, what you gon do?” Jimmy asked as we drove towards roman’s house.
“I want some answers,” I said as my twin brother tried to talk me in to going back to his house.
“I just think you need to calm down first. I don’t need you doing anything that you may regret.”
“They played me, Uce…Like really planned all dat shit,” I said in disbelief as Jimmy turned off the highway.
“I don’t see Roman doing that. I think he just got caught up in not wanting to lose Kara, so he kept quiet,” Jimmy said as I rolled my eyes.
“He still shoulda’ told me what was up. I been at doctor appointments, ultrasounds, getting attached to a baby that ain’t even mine!” I hissed.
“I know that, but can we just go over there tomorrow. I know Kara and Roman have a lot to talk about.”
“She ain’t deserve this, big Uce didn’t have to do her like dat,” I said remembering the pain in her eyes as she confronted Tia.
“Have you tried calling her?” Jimmy asked as I shook my head. “Another reason I wanna check on her, I need to lay eyes on her and make sure she good,” I said as Jimmy sighed in defeat.
“A’ight you know I’m wit you. Just don’t do nothing that could send our asses to jail,” Jimmy warned.
“I’ll try but I ain’t making no promises…..Plus, who would call the cops he ain’t got no neighbors for miles.” I said noticing smoke as we neared their house.
“What the hell?..... Is that them?!”Jimmy yelled as I jumped outta the car before he could put it in park, running toward Roman who had a struggling Kara in his arms.
“Aye, let her go!” I yelled, grabbing Roman and making him release Kara in the process as he turned to face me. All I saw was red, and swung connecting with his Jaw.
I saw Jimmy out the corner of my eye reach for Kara, moving her out of the way as I tackled Roman to the ground punching him over and over in the face.
“Fight back!” I yelled releasing my frustration as Roman hit me with an uppercut pushin’ me off of him as I stood up and kicked him in the ribs.
“Get yo’ ass up! I ain’t done!”
“I ain’t tryin’ to fight you, Uce!” Roman yelled as I kicked him one last time before Jimmy grabbed me.
“That’s enough, Uce, let him up,” Jimmy said as Roman coughed struggling to get up, wiping the blood from his mouth.
Kara’s POV
Good, somebody beat his ass….He deserved it.
“I never mean for this shit to happen,” roman said as Jey struggled against Jimmy.
“Why didn’t you tell me? You let her play me!” Jey hissed as Roman looked at me.
“What you lookin’ at me for, you had that shit coming.”
“I didn’t know how to tell ya’ll and I didn’t want to lose you, Kara,” Roman whispered as I turned to walk away, not wanting to even look at him anymore.
“Oh, so now you just gon’ walk away after calling Jey over here to attack me,” Roman accused as I stilled in my steps.
“Kara, ain’t called me, I came to check on her,” Jey said as Roman laughed.
“Of course you did, you just ready to make a move on her,” Roman said as I heard Jey snarl.
“Nah, that’s some shit you would do…I mean you did fuck her sister, didn’t you?” Jey said as I winced at his words.
“I said I was sorry, and ya’ll won’t even give me a chance to explain. Between you attackin’ me, Kara destroying and burnin’ my sh-”
“You deserved it and you should be happy that’s all I did!….. But does me doing that really hurt you, Roman?” I asked walking back towards him.
“Kara-”
“The bus…..Your clothes …. Your shoes….It’s just stuff, Roman……Stuff that you replace or fix with the snap of your fingers, whenever you feel like it.” I said sadly truly trying to get him to understand the damage he has casued.
“Just look at her, Uce. Give her some space,” Jimmy said as Roman sighed in defeat.
“Fine, I’ll leave for now…. But I’m not letting you go Kara,” Roman said as I turned and walked back into the house, not saying another word.
Roman’s POV
I’ll never forget the look on her face …I didn’t know her anymore and I caused the hurt and change in her. Looking at the bus and torched clothes, I knew I deserved it.
Thankfully, Jimmy was attempting to put out the fire with the hose as I looked at Jey.
“Damn, she torched dat shit,” Jimmy said continuing to douse the fire with the water as Jey looked me up and down before heading toward the house.
“Where the fuck you goin’?” I asked, more angry with myself, than Jey. The thought of him comforting her, knowing deep down how he really feels about her has me on edge.
He didn’t respond to my question; he only shook his head continuing to walk towards my house.
“Don’t get too comfortable Jey…… Kara’s still my wife and I ain’t letting her go without a fight.” I warned as Jey scoffed, still refusing to turn around and look at me.
“Shouldn’t you be at the hospital taking care of your new family?” Jey said walking in the house and slamming the door.
“You good to drive, Uce?” Jimmy asked as I nodded.
“Yea, I’m going to see my daughter, and then I’ll be back.” I said making my intentions very clear.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Kara needs some space,” Jimmy said as looked at the bus.
“Oh, I’mma give her all the space she needs…. I’m gon' just crash on the bus until we go back on the road. I'll call the company tomorrow to get everything fixed," I said as Jimmy sighed.
“Uce, I don't think staying on the bus is a good idea…Just grab a room or go to your folks.”
“I can’t uce, this is my home and my wife is in there…….I ain’t going nowhere, this is where I belong,” I said getting in my truck.
“A’ight, you just ain’t gon’ rest until she light dat damn bus on fire wit yo dumbass in it.”
“It’s just a chance I gotta take….. I can’t lose her.”
She’ll forgive me… I have to believe that, we’ve been through too much.
Jey’s POV
As soon as I went in the house I saw Kara sitting on the couch in a daze. The look of hurt adorning her beautiful face made me want to go back out there and whoop his ass again.
Hearing Roman speed out the driveway, I went to sit beside her.
“He’s gone,” I whispered as she nodded wiping away her tears as I sighed pulling close as she sobbed.
Damn him for doing this to her…. I could take it; I had no emotional ties really to Tia…. only the baby and I didn’t even have that anymore.
“I was outta control…I don’t know what came over me,” Kara whispered as I sighed.
“Your hurt and you have a right to be.”
“I thought I could, but I can’t stay here,” Kara said as I nodded in understanding looking at all their pictures on the wall.
“Kayla, you ain’t got to stay here…. Come home with me,” I offered as we sat in silence for a few minutes, no words spoken as I waited with bated breath for her answer.
“I’ll go with you,” she whispered finally as I sighed in relief, pulling her closer, kissing her gently on the forehead.
The fallout from Roman and Tia’s betrayal was just getting started and I knew it was about to get ugly, but Kara wasn’t going to have to go through this alone…
I’m here and I don’t give a damn who doesn’t like it.
One thing I knew for sure, Tia was gon' have to see Kara and Roman was gon' have to see me...
Taglist:
@reci24 @southerngirl41 @vebner37 @jeyusos-girl
@melaninsugababy @romanreignkisser @bebesobrielo
@arination99 @2-muchsauce @bakugoumarianawrites
@empressdede @alyyaanna @christinabae @anonandwannakeepitthatway @venusesworld @jeyusosgirl @theninthwonder @mya2real @justazzi @whatdoeseverybodywant @reignsboy19 wooahmiri alichesmi pytbgeezy @ superpietom
@truefant4sy @yana3sworld amandairene88 unapologeticqueen94 empressdede xbriexx @harmshake
tshepisho thatgirlest98 zdotspinalot mainthingdoja jimingotthajams rose-bliss mrswolffs-blog maeb99 jstarr86 sayyestoheav3nn digidestned @kriissy4gov
#jey uso fanfiction#jey uso x reader#jey uso fanfic#jey uso imagine#wwe fanfiction#jey uso smut#jey uso x fem reader#roman reigns fanfiction#jey uso x oc#jey uso fic#roman reigns fan fiction#roman reigns fanfic#roman reigns fic#roman reigns fluff#roman reigns imagine#roman reigns smut#roman reigns x black reader#roman reigns x chubby oc#roman reigns x female reader#roman reigns x oc#roman reigns x reader#roman reigns x y/n#roman reigns oneshot#roman reigns one shot#wwe smut#wwe fic#wwe imagine#wwe jey uso#wwe x fem reader#wwe x reader
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Fall's here y'all
Which means it's now far too cold to leave the absolutely massive number of house plants I have outside.
To my dismay
This spot is absolutely magical in the summer. I’m so head over heels in love with my porch that many times over the warm months my partner had to come outside to gently prod in reminding me that food has to be cooked and I have spent the entire day outside losing complete track of time.
I smoke my pipe and hookah out here. I eat my breakfasts and drink my coffee here. I get to wave to all the neighbors and occasionally give away a few plants and veggies.
I love this pouch.
Unfortunately it becomes a barren wasteland in the winter months because I'm just not comfortable sitting outside if it's below 60F, a temperature nowhere even near the average my area gets in the cold months.
Winter is a real downer for me.
But I do have my own little escape in the attic.
The air was noticeably fresher after bringing all these up here. I had spent the entire day before cleaning this space and it was hot and muggy and stale and now It's like stepping into a forest. The air is still humid but now it's a nice kinda oxygenated humid.
The last headcount I did for this space was over 114 individual pots but not necessarily number of plants. I’m really big into companion planting and will very often allow plants to share a pot if the space is available so many of these pots have more than one plant growing in them.
I think they grow better when they have friends.
This count isn't for every plant I got. The big boys like the miracle berry tree/aloe/monstera stay downstairs all winter since hualing plants that lorge into the attic is difficult with the non standard stairwell size and I'll be honest this space is already full to the gills.
I would like to take this opportunity to thank my boyfriend for helping me bring all these up here load after load when we both realized we had only that day to move all these little bastards before the frost.
I’ve set up a auto waterer. Some of these plants need more water than I can keep up with so this is really nice for those periods when the winter depression hits hardest.
A handy little thing if you're like me and have a pretty demanding watering schedule:
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B086BHHPR3/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o00_s00
Really easy to set up. Looks like it fits on just about any kind of bucket lip. I just keep a bucket up here filled with water from the rain barrels. Runs on a battery or a USB. Saved my taros from certain death last year.
Those bitches needs so much fuckin' water.
Anyways. Just giving an update on the plants. I'll talk about the downstairs ones in another post.
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BOOP YOUR FRIENDS TO HELL AND BACK
Do YOU want to boop your friends so hard they look at their inbox and go, "oh shit, I've been fuckin' booped!" Well then I have the tool for you!
boop.ahk <- link (does NOT auto-download)
What is AutoHotKey? Is it a virus??
AutoHotKey is like an autoclicker but better. Think of it like Notepad++ but for autoclickers. It can hold code that is great for booping, such as:
Finding the boop button
Clicking the boop button
How do I use this??
1. Download AutoHotKey. It's very lightweight (1 KB).
2. Download boop.ahk .
3. Go to Tumblr
4. Press shift+P to enter dark mode
5. Using the Snipping tool (Mac, Windows), take a screenshot of the "boop" link
6. Save it as "boop.png"
7. Open boop.ahk by right clicking it and pressing "Edit Script"
8. Follow the instructions inside!
#I promise u it looks like a lot of steps but that's just bc I broke them down a lot#each step takes like. 2 seconds#it has to be in dark mode bc the white background doesn't work with the image finder for compression reasons#any dark background is gucci#tumblr#april fool's day#april fools#boop#super boop#code#computer science#??? idk how to tag this lol#autohotkey#ahk#ahk my beloved
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SPOILER WARNINGS FOR THE LAST OF US
watching the hospital scene in the hbo show for the last of us just... it floored me. i mean, it really made me appreciate the differences in the way a show can tell a narrative versus the way a video game can.
video game story-telling is so unique. there’s nothing else like it, you know? you put the player IN the world. you make the player interact with it, and it’s fucking personal. it’s not just watching actors on a screen, it’s YOU doing it. it’s immersive and engrossing, and i think that’s absolutely amazing. especially when it comes to the last of us. it’s brutal in such a unique way. all the different sequences, and the position the game puts the player in. the things we gotta do to survive. the way it makes us invest emotionally, and deeply, in subtle ways. and it comes together in that last portion and it’s really well done.
but that hospital scene in the show just fuckin’ hit different. completely.
in the game, i think the majority of players felt the same way. they were gonna save ellie. there were no qualms about it. we spent the whole game killing npc’s to protect her, and this was no different. and it’s a challenging level, you know? we’re not really thinking about what we’re actually doing in terms of weight and the possible consequences. we’re just saving ellie. just mowing down these npc’s like we have been. it requires some concentration, and that can kinda take away from the emotional weight of what’s going on due to the action and having to focus on the gameplay.
but in the show... that scene is fucking haunting. pedro pascal’s performance was so compelling. the way his facial expression is just... blank. he’s not panicked. he’s not angry. he’s just... on auto-pilot. there’s no reaction from him as he kills all of those fireflies. and us, as the viewers, are just that: viewers. we’re not doing it. we’re just watching. and it’s hard to watch. it’s brutal. and it really drives home how, uh, deranged joel looks. like. holy shit man. this is fucked. this is INTENSE. and the way he does the killing. there’s no hesitation. there’s no emotion at all. even with the firefly who set down his weapon and surrendered. joel just fucking shoots him anyway. and the way he’s just picking up different guns as his runs out of ammo. the way he uses a knife instead to finish the job. when we’re playing it, it feels practical, you know, looting the dead npc’s like we have been. but in the show it’s just like, holy fuck, man. it’s just haunting.
don’t get me wrong, it’s intense in the game, too. but there’s something about seeing it the way the show is able to portray it. with real people. real human beings. the killing and the blood just feels heavier. it’s so visceral. and again, we’re not the ones doing it. we’re not feeling justified or vindicated. we don’t have to defend our actions. it just is what it is. a man killing an entire hospital full of people who could potentially find a cure to save one little girl he’s forged an unbreakable bond with. it gives a different perspective.
tldr: shit is good.
#the last of us#the last of us hbo#the last of us part 1#joel miller#ellie williams#pedro pascal#bella ramsey#naughty dog#sorry i just have a lot of thoughts#it's so good#i love this story#the different modes of story telling are so good#i appreciate em both for different reasons
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home
kenjorine band au oneshot <3
characters; kenny mccormick x marjorine stotch
warnings; tooth-rotting fluff teehee
a/n; short lil oneshot bcos i love these silly little guys!!
the brick wall of the alleyway is cold and damp as marj leans her head against it, finger twirled around the cord of a decrepit payphone. she’s lucky it still works, she thinks, before her thoughts are drowned out by the dial tone she’d come to know and love.
crimson dawn’s tour had been a success thus far; 14 sold out shows, with 1 more to go. stan, jimmy, marj and bebe had spent countless nights exploring the cities they’d only be in for a day or so, before they’d be back on the bus, travelling to the next to do it all over again. it was incredible, and she’d seen more of america than she thought she’d ever see in her life in just the space of two weeks. the band had been a silly pastime for her a year ago. an escape from her parents and their sheltered household. now, playing to crowds of thousands of fans every night, she’s sure nothing can feel as perfect as this.
well, except, maybe..
“marj.”
his voice is quiet, and she almost doesn’t hear it over the sound of the bustling nighttime streets of phoenix. she holds in a squeal of happiness. “hiya, ken!”
she can hear him chuckle from the other side of the phone, then sigh. it’s not a frustrated sigh, or a fed-up sigh- those, she was used to hearing, especially from her parents. this was a sigh of comfort, like a weight’s been lifted from kenny’s shoulders.
he’d never been a religious man, though his family were. promises of eternal happiness and a loving god with a ‘plan’ seemed so far from reality. but, after every show, when the phone rings and he hears her sweet, sweet voice, he could fall to his knees and pray, thank whatever divine being brought her to him.
“how was the show?” it’s a simple question, and he asks it every night without fail. he makes sure she’s okay after the bad ones, and congratulates her after the good ones, and always, always tells her how proud he is of her. kenny had left crimson dawn to work with his brother at the auto shop, hoping to save up some money to put karen through college further down the line. marjorine was still butters back then. music wasn’t kenny’s biggest passion anyway. that spot was saved for his sister and now, also, marj. the only people in the world he’d die a hundred times over for.
“so much fun. our next one’s gonna be the best we’ve ever done, though. pinky promise.” she giggles into the receiver. stan had made sure that south park was their last stop on the tour, meaning tomorrow she’d be home. maybe not her actual house; she’d been living in bebe’s spare room since she told her parents she didn’t wanna go to college. no, home. with kenny. she swears she can hear his grin through the phone.
“do i get a backstage pass? yknow, since i’m a groupie.” she laughs and it’s loud and real and it feels so good to be joking around, to forget about how difficult it is being away from him. “aw ken, of course you do! i wouldn’t exactly call you a groupie, though,”
“my girlfriend is a fuckin’ gorgeous, talented rockstar. i wear the word groupie like a badge of honour, babe.”
marj looks out to the street as she hears the backstage door open, watching jimmy lean against the handrail of the stairs while stan and bebe use his crutches as swords, doubling over, laughing their asses off. they’re all red in the face, still sweating from the show, but they’re having the time of their lives, and so is she. admiring the people she’s been through her worst and best times with as they act like completely loveable idiots. it’s bittersweet; she wishes kenny was there to watch too.
she’s silent for a moment, listening to his soft, rhythmic breathing, dulled slightly by the static of the old phone. “geez, ken, i miss you,” it comes out cracked and quiet, and she doesn’t even realise there’s a tear rolling down her cheek until it brushes her lip. she wipes it away, pretending it’s his hand instead of her own. “one more night, babe. then i’m all yours.” marj lets out a sniffly laugh, even though she knows his words aren’t true. it didn’t matter whether she was in his arms, or in the depths of hell; wherever they ended up, he’d always be all hers.
#brook1yn-baby#south park#kenny mccormick#sp kenny#south park kenny#kenny x butters#kenny x marjorine#sp kenjorine#south park kenjorine#sp angst#butters leopold stotch#south park marjorine#marjorine stotch#sp marjorine#sp butters#south park butters#crimson dawn#stan marsh#bebe stevens#jimmy valmer#sp au#south park au#oneshot#my babies
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ASKING YOU ABOUT YOUR AVA/AVM HEADCANONS!! I'D LOVE TO HEAR ABOUT THEM
I AM ABOUT TO GO CRAZY IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT...
okay lets start with just my hollowhead hcs
brace yourselves i wrote a lot
SECOND/ORANGE:
Second isn't actually all that fond of being called TSC he prefers to just be refered to as Orange since that way he feels less like the odd one out of the color gang, he already has enough w his big ass head! So he def prefers that name over his actual name, think of it like a nickname !
Another one, he has no idea of what he is capable of. LIKE. in AvA 5 showdown he gets his shit rocked and then unlocks his inheret hollowhead OP powers right? here's the thing, what if, while all of that was happening, he's completely unconscious and going on auto pilot? Not only does he pass out again and then wake up confused and in disbelief at seeing his friends alive but he is also very confused as to why Chosen bowed to him! He has no clue that it was *HIM* who saved the day and defeated Dark !! RAAHH !! That why we never see him use his powers again (at least fully, or conscious lol) Cause in ep 16 note block battle he had just woken up and in his half-sleep state he went there just to shut his friends up and go back to bed, in my heart of hearts the fuckin uh energy wave he produced wasnt even a conscious action!!
And speaking of his sleeping habits, i think its pretty interesting to see him sleeping so much, i either think it has relation to his powers (even if showdown came after we started to see him sleeping constantly) just for the lols. Another one is that he's just narcoleptic haha
CHOSEN/TCO:
Fucked up little guy he's poprtrayed as cool and level headed and serious by the fandom but all i can think of is back to him first being given his name and deciding to instantly break stuff and cause trouble, he is a menace!! I hc that he is angry a lot of the time, he's just a silent-rage type of guy, easily irritable and impatient, probably sarcastic and to-the-point when he talks
I think he also sleeps a lot, like Second, but in his case he's just depressed el o el, he is also haunted by memories of his time being used by Alan/Creator as an AdBlocker cause that sure had to leave sequels, so he is depressed and thus sleeps a lot but then has terrible nightmares about being a prisoner and thus doesnt sleep but then gets tired and has to sleep a lot and then its just a terrible terrible cycle-
He has decided to move on and "forgive" Creator but he still needs to go to therapy tbh
One more for him is that he is both very caring to Orange and very scared of him. HEAR ME OUT, Chosen knows what this kid is capable of, he knows that Second doesnt know, and decides to keep it that way for both of their sakes. STILL, even if he is very intimidated by what his little brother can do he still cares for him and looks after him the way he wishes he would have been looked after, even if Orange already has a loving support system in the color gang Chosen tends to go out of his way to check on him, i think that Chosen yearning for family is fucked up and in character since he was the first one to get severly punished by their Creator and even if Orange doesnt need a loving caring family (he already has one) he's gonna give it to him godddammit !! (for both of them)
DARK/TDL:
MY BABYGIRL oh god ohhh god
Okay so to start off, middle-child syndrome. Lots of insecurities and issues with identity and finding out who he is and what is his purpose.
Simple one: i think the bracelets he made to enhance his powers are now imposible to take off and got broken so badly that his powers are now nonexistent (or at least suuuperrr weak) cause of them malfuctioning.
His insecurities come from being literally the weakest of the HollowHeads, imagine being one out of three inherently superpowerful (and probably inmortal!) beings in the world and then not even coming close to defeat either of them on your own. FUCKED UP!
And we know he is aware of this cause he makes all of this technology to enhance his strength and be able to stand on the same ground as Chosen. He only won his second fight w Chosen cause of his gadgets and his bots. And even with those he got easily defeated by Second. In showdown, if we become a little bit crazy, you can interpret his desperation to kill Second as Fear. The moment he thinks Second is down he goes and tries to get his plan into motion cause who fuckin knows what might happen next . And, as he feared. Orange beats him up and all that he worked for is gone in seconds!
And im not saying that him making all of those bots and killing innocent sticks cause they were in his way is okay DEF NOT but i think i can see where it comes from
Here come in play his issues with identity, since being given a name he was going to be Chosen antithesis, the one to defeat him and forever be enemies, but he lost, and instead of finding doom at the hands of Chosen or at the hands of the Creator, he finds companionship and a brother in Chosen, both of them break out of what they were supposed to be and run away after causing a mess.
Again mentioning how Chosen is the more destructive/chaotic one, i think that Dark held onto that and decided alright! this is me now! Just like him! Destructive. He makes that his entire personality and goal since he doesnt actually have any other. He was given a mission which was to destroy Chosen, he failed, and then he got a new mission, destroy Alan's PC, and then he, didnt have anything, just chosen, so he kept on destroying stuff, thats what they both did! And then, against his given interpretation of being a destroyer. he created something, he made viruses and bots yes, but he MADE them, he made himself something to be stronger, he had a plan that he was genuelly excited to show Chosen, like, "Look! I can get us revenge on the Creator, for what he did to you! For what he did to us!" ITS JUST SO. BITTERSWEET TO ME,, that when he thinks hes doing something by his own free will he's meet with rejection and told to stop, so thats why he sticks to it, he goes thru with his plan and decides hes not going to follow orders around anymore, this is what he is this is what he wants, he wants revenge, he wants to make the person that hurt him HURT. its so.... OUGH
And then of course it doesnt work as he wanted. he loses yet another battle and is left alone to put himself back together, it makes me so so so sad to think about him badly injured and having to pick himself up and just. move on.
In my perfect world after Showdown Chosen goes to look for Dark and they slowly but surely start to rebuild their relationship again.
ALRIGHT thats all i got now MAN i really have a lot of thoughts on this HJDASFHJSDHJF THANK YOU FOR ASKING DEAR ANON U MEAN THE WORLD TO ME, HAVE TINY DARK DOODLE <3 hes showing u the blueprints for his next project
#ene answers#ene does art#the dark lord#animation vs animator#ava#the second coming#the chosen one#TDL#TSC#TCO#please please keep sending me inboxes about any of the stickmen i am so insane about avm/ava#fuck it ava/avm request are available too
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not FED error standing there menacingly as Night runs to him as a plan B 😭
Error knew this original plan would not work out, but he wasn’t about to just steal Nightmare’s moment! He be inevitable backup (〜￣▽￣)〜
(Also fun fact: I spent a lotta time drawing that frame, took a picture to send to my friends, then my typically-auto-saving-program decided to delete all my efforts and I’ve never been so happy to have taken a picture, I was able to fuckin trace that shit always manually save your drawings guys omfg)
#error: does all the work#also Error: omg Nightmare look at you you got your first hoard all by yourself!#Nightmare: ÓoÒ omg I did it!#undertale#undertale multiverse#asks#dragon balance au#nightmare sans#nightmare!sans#passive nightmare sans#dreamtale#error!sans#error sans#wyrms on strings au#fed au
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Left of Bang
Characters: Captain Syverson & female you, OC parents
Summary: You’re used to holding up the world for your family. But what happens when you need someone to hold up the world for you?
Warnings: angst, reference to terminal illness, dying parent, hospital scene
Word Count: 2,400 ish
A/N: this is marginally autobiographical; my dad was diagnosed with cancer a year ago. As the oldest daughter, unmarried/no kids, helping out my parents has frequently fallen to me - never more so than over the last year. And I’m happy to do it! I see it as my vocation. But there are days when the world is so. Damn. Heavy. If only I really did have Sy here to hold me on those days… Also - many hugs and thank yous to my bestie and beta @thesassywallflower for giving this a review for me.
~~~~~
There are people that being in hospitals doesn’t bother ‘em. I’m not one of those.
It’s always been crazy to me that all hospitals smell the same. Even out in the desert, that same smell came through while carrying stretchers in or visiting my boys. Antiseptic, heavy duty cleaner, and bandages. And something else - I call it the “stress scent”. Sleepless staff, worried families, they all got it. Almost smells like sweat, but not quite.
Being here…the smell, the sounds, keeps trying to drag my brain back to memories I don’t want to see. Standing in hallways dimmer and dustier than these, repeating to every medical person what happened to my soldier. Why can’t they just write it down? Save a dude from having to relive it over and over.
“And when did the symptoms begin?” The soft voice was kind, but I felt my guts flinch at the question. The same question she’d answered about a hundred fuckin’ times.
“About a month ago, we noticed him shuffling his feet when he walked. Last week, he started losing mobility on his left side. He went to see his doctor, they ordered tests. They called him last Tuesday and told him to go to the ER because they suspected he was having a stroke. And he’s been here for the last 4 days since they transferred him here after finding the brain tumor.”
The latest specialist nodded as he spoke, his pen scratching as he hustled his handwriting to keep up. Then there was another exam of her dad, more questions, what prescriptions does he take. Now, I’m sure that this doctor, a kidney specialist, is an observant pro. They gotta be, right? But he’s only lookin’ at her dad. Which is good and right; he’s the patient, after all. Sometimes, he turns and includes her mom in the talkin’. Pats mom’s shoulder when her chin starts to tremble.
Nobody’s lookin’ at my girl but me, though.
She’s got that look. If I’ve seen it once, I’ve seen it a hundred times - that numb kinda fatigue soldiers learn to fight through. The kind of stress that lives up high in your chest, squeezin’ the top of your lungs and leaves your eyes burning. Puts you on a weird type of auto-pilot - you look and sound plugged in because you’re working so hard to look that way. But it’s survival mode, all the same.
She started to get up out of her chair - I knew she wanted to offer it to the doctor when he leaned against the wall - but I kept her sittin’ with a hand on her shoulder. She didn’t look up at me as she listened to the doc, but her cold fingers reached up to squeeze mine. I glanced around the room as I listened - a habit of too many years for me to quit now. Her mama sat sad and tragic-lookin’, wringing her hands. I don’t think I’ve ever actually seen a woman do that until everything went to shit with Papa C. Mama C crumpled like a paper bag - she couldn’t handle even the simplest task without looking to my girl.
My gaze moved to Papa C. The man had aged 20 years in a couple’a days. Cancer’s a bastard. He listened to the doctor, but with the brain tumor and diabetes messin’ him up, I don’t know how much he’s tracking on everything. More tests ordered, surgery comin’ soon, and then goodbyes got the new doc out the door.
Despite my snacking, my belly growled right in her ear from where I stood behind her. Shit.
“Dad, I think we’re going to head home. Are you set for now until morning?” Up and moving again. Swear to God, she’s like an exhausted Energizer Bunny on the last bit of a cocaine high. I couldn’t stop my jaw from clenching as I watched her gather up the ziploc bags from her mama’s lap. She glanced at me once as she pitched the uneaten sandwich and crackers into the trash - she’d made all of us a lunch to try and stop the spending. Hospital life for families ain’t cheap, and cafeteria food got old real fast. My sweet li’l Hummingbird even went to the trouble of toasting my sandwich bread ‘cause she knows I like it, and crammed so many crackers in my bag the corner of one poked a hole in it. She’d eaten her own like she was gettin’ paid for it, even managed a few crackers. But her water bottle sat barely touched, and she hadn’t even opened the candy bar I got her from the vending machine bandit down the hall.
That’s the thing about soldiers - they learn to do enough to survive. More than that is just damn hard to do.
There’s a concept we learn in officer training called “Baseline + Anomaly = Decision”. Basically, you learn the ‘usual’ about your environment or person you’re with - that becomes your baseline. Then, you watch for any changes - anomalies. If the anomalies are a big enough issue, then you gotta choose a course of action - decision. And this concept is critical ‘cause you wanna keep you and your soldiers left of bang - before a bad thing happens. After the bad thing happens, now you’re right of bang and fucked.
Anybody else would look at my Hummingbird and not see anomalies. She’s up and movin’, walkin’, talkin’, doing her thing. Looking all kinds of like ‘baseline’. But I’m not anybody. And she’s given off anomalies fit to sink an Abrams “Beast” tank.
As Mama C started fluttering around the bed, I gathered up all her paraphernalia - the woman didn’t travel light. Hummingbird’s cheery voice reached me as I turned to watch her smack a kiss to Papa C’s forehead, rubbing his bristly bald head gently before she started trying to herd her mama towards the door.
“Well, Papa C, I’m gonna get your girls home. What contraband you want me to smuggle you in tomorrow?”
The older man smiled like I hoped as he told me, “a medium-well steak, Sy. Make it a sirloin strip.”
“10-4, sir.” I patted his shoulder and started to stand straight when he tapped my belly with the back of his hand. He glanced once towards the door where his daughter stood steamrolling his wife into her walker-wheelchair combo thing before he looked up at me.
“You take good care of her, alright?”
I leaned in close, wanting to reassure him. “You don’t worry about your wife, sir. I’m happy to watch out for her.”
He nodded once, glancing again at the women. “Thank you. But I don’t mean her.” His gaze was serious - almost a little sad - when he looked back up at me. “Beth has always leaned too hard on our oldest, and my little cupcake hasn’t always said no to her mama the way she should. I know she’s doing too much. She needs somebody to look after her.”
Seems a brain tumor and kidney failure couldn’t stop the former military man’s eagle eyes. I squeezed his shoulder, lowering my voice to just us.
“It will be my honor, sir.”
He rested back against the pillow, like I took a load off his mind. “You’re a good man, Sy.”
Mama C cried the whole drive back to her house. Thank the Lord that Hummingbird’s 7 year old brother was staying with a friend. She gave Mama C stern marching orders to eat, take her meds, go to sleep, and be ready to roll at 8:30am tomorrow morning. The minute we got in my truck, she went loose and quiet like somebody’d cut her strings. My lungs squeezed my chest tight as I realized - my little bird felt safe with me. Safe enough to stop fightin’ to survive.
The bright lights of the kitchen couldn’t hide her pallor. I helped her ditch her shoes onto the “HazMat mat” we’d relegated our germy soles to for decon each day, then urged her onto a barstool. In minutes, I had a pan of scrambled eggs and ham going. As an afterthought, I chucked in a couple handfuls of spinach. Vitamin A or potassium or some shit, but it was green and good for her. I wrapped up a hearty serving in a tortilla with a healthy dose of cheddar and handed her a plate.
“Hummingbird, why don’t you go take a shower? Or a good soak?” I watched her eat mechanically, that numb fatigued survival mode trying to kickstart up again.
“I will. Just gotta do the shoes and call Louise.” Her sister kept up a regular stream of texts and FaceTimes, but living 250 miles away with four kids and a husband working two jobs, she just couldn’t be here.
“Shoe duty is mine. Why don’t you text Lou the latest deets and tell her you’ll call in the morning?” There it was - that smile I loved. Just a hint of it, but I’ll take it.
“Did you actually use the word ‘deets’?”
I let my own smile stretch wide, pleased as punch when hers got bigger. “Damn straight, I did. ‘Cause I’m a cool ass grown up.”
She snorted around a mouthful of eggs, rolling her eyes as she scooped up her phone and hopped to the floor. “Alright, Captain, I hear you loud and clear.”
Even the simplest kiss she smacked on my face made my skin tingle. She didn’t see me smiling at her as she turned the corner for the master bath.
The minutes ticked by faster than I realized, and a quarter hour later, the shoe soles were Lysol’d and my emails were caught up. I could hear the shower as I made the hall, but when I sat on the bed and my shirt hit the floor, my heart went right along with it. Hummingbird wasn’t in the shower. She was sat on the bathroom floor, head back against the cabinet, just starin’.
That survival mode, all that endurance, had quit on her.
I squatted down in front of her, givin’ her space but lettin’ her feel my presence as I reached down and took her hands. Those fingers lay limp in mine - not even a squeeze.
“Talk to me, Hummingbird.”
Deep breath in and out - her movements so slow and heavy, it was like watching her underwater.
“I’m ok.”
I slid my hands into her hair, cupping the base of her skull, and rubbed the bones the way she loved. She sagged even looser into my grasp.
“You don’t have to be.”
Anomalies. Her swallow suddenly all tight. The way the left corner of her mouth quirked down a bit. Her bottom lip trembled. So, I decided on a course of action. I sat down cross-legged on the floor, pulled her into my lap, and hugged her up tight to me.
Left of bang.
She broke to pieces in my arms. Face in my neck, hands squeezing my shoulders fit to pinch, and cryin’ so hard my own eyes burned. And I couldn’t do a damn thing but hold her.
The shower kept on runnin’, but the water bill could go to hell. I ignored the steam as I rocked my girl, stroking her over and over. I wasn’t gonna tell her ‘everything will be fine, it’s ok’ when it sure as shit was not. So I just told her the truth for the now.
“I’m here, Hummingbird. I’m here. I’ve got you. I’ve got you, sweetheart.” At first, I wasn’t sure she could hear me, she was cryin’ so hard. It didn’t matter. I just kept on saying it - her heart was gonna hear it.
Coulda been 5 minutes, coulda been an hour, but those cries finally started to slow. Her hands stroked up my shoulders to my head, and she started gently rubbing my buzz cut. She told me once how soothing that was to her, and I never teased her about it again. She sighed all shuddery against me, and when she spoke, her little voice damn near broke me.
“I’m so tired, Sy.”
“I know.”
“My dad is dying.”
“I know.”
Her arms wrapped around my neck, and I settled her in snug against me. We just sat and breathed for a minute as I rubbed her back up and down. I wanted to reach into her and take all that pain, and carry it for her. Seventeen years in the Army taught me - it just can’t be done. But I can damn sure clear a path and lighten that load.
I got her on her feet, then into the shower to get the hospital off both of us. That flowery lotion bar butter crap kept slippin’ out of my hands and she chuckled when I cussed at the damn stuff before I could massage it in her skin. Her eyes were tired but she smiled sweet at me when I kissed her belly. I rested my head there for a second, letting the water rain on me and feeling the warmth of my woman against me. We both needed this.
“I’m sorry I cried all over you.” Her voice hummed against me where I rested on her, and I couldn’t stop the frown as I looked up at her. She dodged my look and reached for my beard soap, but I wasn’t lettin’ this go. I stood up so I could get her full attention, cupping her face to look up at me.
“You don’t say ‘sorry’ for cryin’ with me, Hummingbird.” She didn’t say anything for a bit. My chin raised up a hair as the Ranger Captain in me couldn’t let go of it until I got the answer I wanted, and she needed.
Her hair moved against my hands as she nodded. “Ok, Sy.” Mission accomplished.
Later, I got her bundled into her favorite shirt she stole from me and a pair of those fuzz floppy socks she likes so much. I turned on her favorite piano music station on Pandora, then opened my arms for all the cuddles she wanted.
“Sy?”
“Yeah, little bird?”
She didn’t say anything right away. The dark room and quiet music were pulling both of us to sleep.
“It’s not gonna be ok. It’s gonna suck.”
“That’s true.”
“But we’re gonna get through it”
“Yeah, we are.”
She didn’t say anything else, and a few minutes passed with us squirming a little into more comfortable positions.
“Sy?”
“Mmmhmm?”
“I’m gonna get through it because I’ve got you.”
My throat closed up so tight, my swallow hurt. “You sure as hell do. And I’ve got you.”
So, yeah - hospital visits suck ass. But this is my new tour. My hummingbird needs someone to keep her left of bang. And I’ll report for duty every damn day.
#shy vy writes#captain syverson fanfic#captain syverson fanfiction#syverson#syverson x you#captain syverson x reader#Left of Bang
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hold on I know I briefly mentioned my origins mod based escapades when I commented on why Viking should in fact be feared and why also dominon fix I think was probably underestimated but does anybody want to hear about some of the weird shit I pulled. No? Too bad.
I was the resident enderian. Spawn was this tiny tiny fuckoff island about 8 blocks from the main continent. Yeah it wasn't that bad. By the time I was added to the server somebody had built a tunnel across so I was not melted trying to get to a tree. This was the first like, big thing I'd done since 1.14, and unfortunately the server got like. updated, rebooted, and I don't think anybody has logged on in years, so I cannot provide screenshots, but here's the thing. The main continent was adjacent to the ocean.
so when deciding on a spot to build my house, I picked the most reasonable spot for somebody allergic to water.
About 30 blocks off the coast of the continent, straight up On The Water. I then proceeded to build the worlds most obnoxious tower that I was planning having stretch to build limit (unfortunately I never got there due to server shutdown) but as part of my house, I had no stairs for a Solid chunk of time. I solved this by having platforms I'd teleport to. Everybody else? Uh. They didn't. I eventually added stairs but until then uh. I have no idea how they navigated.
For a solid chunk of time my storage consisted of 6 single chests and my inventory. I think at some point the server owner made me a basement and put an automatic storage system in there, I never used it. It was small and I just. never used it. I have never used an auto sorter I have never built one and uh. Yeah.
My backyard was fuckin strange though. Because yeah, Big Obnoxious Tower in the middle of the ocean? There's no backyard. it was all built by me. It started as a small farm so I could make a food thing that worked much better than standard food. Then I pathed out a little more and added a tree growing platform. And branched off for eventually a turtle farm, a sugar cane farm, and a creeper/mob grinder. I got sick of placing trap doors eventually and gave up trying to make it creepers only but I want you to imagine this eyesore of a creeper grinder guys.
Not only was it likely far, far taller than any sane creature would have ever suggested (I've made taller ones now, that were fully creepers btw.) but it was also made of netherrack. And had a small portion of dark oak planks iirc. and it just came down this obsidian tube because the creepers hated everything I live for and a pair of trap doors that were supposed to be a step stool for the inchling and the vex. tiny little bastards. anyways the vex (who is named E btw. yeah we just call him E I'm related to this fucker.) never flipped the trapdoors back down? I promised him vengeance for this crime. he never logged on I. The Least active player and there were guys I've never met.
anyways. I later added an axolotl tank. and an excessively large farm. and there was also a bee enclosure. the chicken farm always was and forever will be Something to me. the turtle farm was because I could use scutes to make water resistance potions and I kept taking damage from the water (for obvious reasons.)
I had the Villager Pit, known as I dug out 4 chunks drove all 6 villagers in the village into the pit using boats, sealed it, and then proceeded to place down enough beds to cover the entire area and threw bread and vegtables at them regularly. this was before I learned how to properly wrangle villagers. I built another huge fuckoff farm on top of this and mobs spawned underneath it all the damn time. I actually had the waypoint for this place saved as "PIA - Potentially Illegal Activities" due to the severe villager mistreatment that undoubtedly took place. Including the initial unintentional massacre. the server was on normal for a solid bit of time until it got shuffled to hard purely for the sake of my lag zone.
there were over 200 villagers there, most of which sat and did nothing. I got weirdly good at separating zombie villagers into their own slots before curing them. I did this by infecting them like. 20 at a time and then dragging the zombie back to his containment hole. it was absolute anarchy I've never done villagers that way again and I never plan to.
My mine was on another continent a few hundred blocks out and I remember taking probably about 5-10 minutes to run all the way back from the end of my tunnel where I was mining to get back home. this was with me teleporting my ass off by the way I was not walking guys.
I had a massive castle build planned and I spent so much time clearing the 13 x 17 chunks to build it in and I never actually got around to building it and it also likely didn't help that it was 80 thousand blocks out that I had to traverse every time I went out there. I also had a horrible habit of not setting my spawn out there, dying, and then spending 20 minutes flying 10k blocks across the nether roof. this would happen going both ways. I had actually started the terraforming part, I should have a go at building the castle again at some point.
I got really petty at E at one point or another and spent probably an hour and several several stacks of bone meal growing double tall grass in front of his house for several blocks. this man was half a block tall and could fly, he got so mad at me for it he refused to log on until I fixed it. it inconvenienced the inchling more than it did E.
I had a network of several base locations I was working on and lodestones to nether portals hidden everywhere.
I had far, far too many shulker boxes. it was definitely a couple hundred. I had 5 elytra on display and they had a habit of getting fucking stolen so I renamed them all 1-5 and they got stolen a lot less after that. I have no idea who kept stealing them.
oh yeah I had no back door. The way you got in and out was through a half slab placed behind my house which I would teleport through. The solutions others had were either going up, over, or around, or if you were Rose, phasing through the blocks, or if you were Tree, being tiny enough to crawl through the gap.
I kept hiding my shulker boxes in my walls, I think I had 30 or so just under the walls in the nether layer of my house.
each layer of my house was themed, the first two were standard house inside and out and I eventually placed just So Many Barrels which were incredibly disorganized on the second floor, and the third layer looked normal enough from the outside but it was a very tall nether themed floor. above that was the end floor, which I think I ended up with the dragon egg and I kept that on display there. above that was the ocean monument floor, I think I made a mushroom floor above that for my friend Mayo, and above that was the landing pad. I had more planned but I never got around to building them,
At some point somebody, I think it was tree, built several large enderman themed things in my house and they never left despite blocking off access to my initial 6 chests because I loved them.
I had a few pet endermen. There were 4. I know one was named mark. they all vanished eventually and it was distinctly upsetting because I thought somebody killed them. no there was just a weird server thing.
there is. probably more. Weirdass server sometimes I tell ya
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I’ve seen you mention wigglebox a couple times the last few days. Are they bad news? I thought they were team destiel.
Wigglebox got banned from my server for triangulating Jensen's colorado home. Used satellite, after trying to pretend to be investors trying to buy vacation homes didn't work, and other weird steps they did whilel I wasn't paying attention. I had made them a little hobby room to find if/where misha was during the finale and somewhere they completely lost the plot. They found mishas sisters places and like 3d toured their houses on realty and shit like it was SO out of fuckin pocket.
Wigglebox ran to a server named Andromeda, where they continued their weird stalky shit. And swore it was "to protect Jensen's address." they also insisted they found it accidentally. They accidentally looked for unique trees in his videos and accidentally swept the entire town they knew he was in by satellite to accidentally find him.
Per the linked post, Andromeda did some really shady shit during the spn finale script thing. POLOL was arranging a 25 dollar distribution with the vendor to release multiple copies anyone could buy and put us on the first issue list. But Andromeda found out we were doing that and had arranged some shady backdoor deal for a supposed second physical script for 400 (never happened) and kept trying to aggro us out of the 25 dollar deal because wigglebox REALLY wanted that script and attention.
And we were like. No??? so anyway. 2po was busy boning Kelios and Vinnie at that time, which he denies despite my pinned receipts. That whole server denies it. Why?
Because despite wigglebox swearing 2po wasn't trustable and that's why they needed THEIR script save or whatever they decided to team up, and Andromeda became Scripthunt. 2po got on the secondary distro list of the digitals and waved it around like LOOK WHAT I DID and we all rolled our eyes. OK whatever but we have the truth and guess what 2po you were wrong I was right. But meantime he boned V/K for 5K, which again, despite receipts, they deny.
But in came that group. And every big name fan that felt the end of their throne coming in the new show, every salty ass, bitter ass motherfucker lined up in there. It's not even like. Just one lane. Like. Hellers used to know better than to work with Jules, or Fangasm. Those were ones that had big warning signs stapled on them about being snakes and untrustable. (And I mean, her bad intel DID already bone 2po earlier about THE FAKE SCRIPT, because her Very Shiny Crew Badge.) Oh and the next wave there was people I banned from my server for trying to hijack admin permissions and delete shit in mine. Oh and the one bastard banned from my server for being a blatant sea lion troll that was annoying literally the entire server for months on end.
Like. Aborddeimpala? Makes great gifs. But hard anti. They're trying to play the moderate "OH NO WE CAN ALL JUST GET ALONG" like it's 2011 again. And like. no. the show was made to get rid of a bunch of those people.
Anyway, that's also where a lot of my targeted hate comes from, it's all directed out of that server. They refuse to back off even when proven wrong on the pilot or anything else, 2po just shifts new lies and narratives and pumps it through the scripthunt server while wringing money out of people to send their buddies to cons free, even with gold passes. "for autos, for charity" that see a sliver of it back. And idk why gold is included. silver autos are the same. Also why they attack me so hard for freely distributing scripts. It really fucks their game up.
Almost like. Wait for it. The entire origin of that server is shady snakes, clout seekers, stalkers, aggros, antis, bitters, and people with major agendas that are forming their final stand of relevance as the self proclaimed guardians of old scripts. That's ... basically who makes the place. Fangasm wants to stay relevant. Superwiki wants to stay relevant. And even with her badge and bajillion followers her traction isn't really even higher than mine. And that pisses them off. Fangasm doesn't have jared to uwu at now. Like. I could just go on and on and on breaking down how it's a toxic installation of fandom old BNFs that just don't want to go irrelevant in the new fandom.
And, again, another reason they attack my SPNWIN leaks so hard. Because they realized they got left in the past and their coffee runner Wiki has shittier, older access than what I found. And I knew, when that server sent THE ENTIRE FANDOM AT ME SCREAMING IT WAS FAKE, it was wrong, both cuz the draft stamps and, you know, I HAD THE OLDER DRAFTS AND ARENAS. But reality didn't matter to them. They just wanted to beat down the people ahead of them in the information game, the people giving out stuff free instead of giving them money or convention rides for it.
THAT'S what that fuckin server is.
So yeah. Wigglebox is a FUCKING problem.
#supernatural#spn#spnwin#fandom#grifters#con artists#antis#bitters#everyone honestly needs to read this
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the auto save in this game fucking sucks. i'm gonna have to do the whole goblin camp again cuz Gale just had to be an asshole and kill my character after taking for-fuckin-ever to explain how to bring him back to life. and of course i forgot to save on my own.
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