I just finished reading Letter to a Stranger by Colleen Kinder (and, of course, many many others) and it was quite a unique read for me
when given the choice (the time), i always read a book all at once in a few hours or over the course of a day or two (depending on how long it is). i’m not so good at pacing myself when it comes to books (i never willingly pace myself...i’m bad). when i don’t have the time, i’m terrible, it’ll take me months to finish a book because i feel so demotivated knowing i might be able to read a few chapters but no more because i’m too busy.
but i started reading this book on the 17th of july, a sunday. i read a few letters. i called it a night. i had a busy week. the 22nd, friday, i read some more letters. i had time to read the majority of the book but i put it down. i read an entire fiction book instead over the course of 2 ish days. i loved that book. i read some more letters. i read some letters each night before bed. just a few. i honestly think this was the first book i’ve ever deliberately paced myself on because it felt like it’d be better consumed slowly, like reading it all at once would ruin it.
i really liked it. not every letter to a stranger of course, some drew my interest more than others. but i just loved the concept. when i think of people who have been a part of my life in one way or another, i never think of strangers. friends, family, teachers, school peers, friends parents, bosses, coworkers, sports leaders/coaches, and so on and so forth, i think of them. but if you ask me about strangers, it’s definitely true some have stuck in my mind often without so much as a name.
When I was 15, I spent one night in the hospital for observation, I was in severe pain and felt miserable but there was a girl in the bed next to me who i remember thinking of as beautiful and falling slightly in love with her (that may have been the very strong pain meds they had me on but still). when morning came, her family came to visit, and her boyfriend. He kissed her and i remember feeling like ‘aw man...’ but then he called her Sharlina and i was like wow that’s a name as beautiful as she is, I’m going to write that down. And I did. And it’s still in my notes. The first name in a list I started of names I like. The name doesn’t particularly appeal to me now but then I remember her and I’m like never mind it’s still beautiful.
Across the room from me was a woman who’d just had kidney stones removed or something of the sort. She was feeling like shit, I remember. Her son had found her passed out and called 111. But in the middle of the night when I was throwing up painfully into a small hospital container she pulled back the curtain around my bed, asked if I wanted her to get a nurse, and patted me on the shoulder. She couldn’t even get up to use the bathroom earlier! But the second she heard a kid around her son’s age throwing up it was like fuck it, my pain is irrelevant, I’m going to help. I never forgot that act of kindness.
and that’s just one occasion. there’s been so many strangers that have a cemented place in my memory it’s wild. and i guess i also have a place in some people’s memory as a stranger who did x.
when i was walking home from high school when i was maybe 14 years old I was stopped by a little kid, maybe 6 or 7, who explained he was walking home from school but was a bit scared. I held his hand and walked with him in the opposite direction from my house talking about his day at school on the way to his house making sure he got there safely until his parents car pulled up alongside us and they took him home from there. i dunno if he’d remember that. it was a minor act on my part, no big deal for me. but it’s cases like that I guess I might’ve stuck for some people.
I know some people hate the idea of Being Known. But from this book I’m actually quite fond of some glimpses people may have caught of me and remembered. Not knowing my name, or anything about me, just that I was doing x once and it was weird or interesting enough that it stuck. I’ll never know any of that. They’ll never know me I imagine. But little fragments of me could exist in random strangers too. that’s a cool thought to me. maybe i’m the grown ass adult they saw jumping in puddles, or the one wearing weird ass neon pink leopard print sweatpants to a council meeting, or the one who couldn’t get a hearty mince pie out of the cafe shelf without spilling half of it on myself, or the person licking an ice block on the coldest day of winter, shivering. i have no clue what’d stick of my actions. but it’s a fun idea to me.
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