My take on how Jancy and Joe first met!

I think it takes a loooot of magic hypnosis to fully wipe a mind like Jancy True's. And I think that much hypnosis would definitely mess you up for at least a few hours. AND I think..... milfs. Reblog if you agree.

Special shout-out to @little-banjo-frog, whose enthusiasm about my wips for this piece was the highlight of a very difficult week!

(Listen I just really like seeing masculine/butch characters in vulnerable situations and if I have the opportunity for that plus a size difference PLUS a dash of rescue and unexpected tenderness on the side, I begin vibrating uncontrollably. For more of that very specific exact thing, check out the graphic novel link in my blog description. ... Please. Pretty please. It is free and short AND I CARE SO MUCH.)

[Image descriptions below the cut]

Image description: A comic done with digital illustration featuring the characters Jancy True and Joebeans from the YouTube series Drawtectives. The comic is done in shades of yellow, pink, blue, and purple, with the exception of the final panel which is done in full color. The style is fairly realistic, with influences from western and Japanese animation styles.

Joe is a large, muscular green-skinned orc woman with voluminous blonde hair in the style of Dolly Parton. She is wearing a sleeveless red flannel, red lipstick and nail polish, jean shorts, and red pumps. She's very pretty and handsome, with a well-endowed figure, and two sharp white bottom fangs that jut up from her bottom lip.

Jancy is an older butch woman. She is thin, with short silver hair, caucasian skin, and angular features. She is wearing a red and yellow Hawaiian shirt, cut-off jean shorts, and red Converse-style sneakers. She has cochlear implants in both ears.

Panel 1: Joe sees Jancy passed out face-down in front of a dumpster in some kind of alley. Joe is in the foreground of the shot and is holding her hand up to her face with an expression of surprise and concern. She is saying, "Oh my!"

Panel 2: Joe's hands carefully turn Jancy onto her side, cupping Jancy's face gently. Jancy looks confused and extremely disoriented, barely awake with circles under her eyes. Joe is urgently saying, "Oh, you poor thing!!! Are you all right?! Are you hurt???"

A small faded speech bubble coming from Jancy reads, "uh--!?"

Small squiggly lines at her shoulder indicate that Jancy is trembling slightly.

Panel 3: a close up from the previous panel, zooming in on Jancy's face, her eyes just barely opening with an expression of great concern as she looks down at the large green palm holding her head up by gently cupping her cheek

Panel 4: a close up from the panel that is to follow, showing Jancy turning her head slightly to squint up at Joe. She is sweating and has hair in her face, and looks only half conscious as she strains to see. In turning her head, she presses her face slightly into Joe's palm

Panel 5: Jancy, still lying on her side, struggles to brace her arm on the ground and get up. Action lines indicate she is trembling and moving jerkily. She doesn't seem to be able to see very clearly. She is barely managing to lift her head several inches off the ground.

Joe's hands support Jancy's head and lightly grip her shoulder. Only Joe's hands are visible, but speech bubbles belonging to her take up most of the panel. She is saying, in a country accent , "Oh gracious! Don't push yerself! What if you've hurt your neck or somethin'??"

a scraggly speech bubble coming from Jancy reads, "ah-- uhh?!?" In small unsteady text.

Panel 6: Jancy gasps and collapses back onto the ground. She lets out a yell and her eyes shut tight in a grimace of pain. Her hands are trembling and tense. Joe's hands are on either side of jancy's face, stabilizing her long slender neck. The shot is framed with Joe's speech bubbles. Joe is saying, "Oh! Oh, dear! It's alright! I gotcha. Please, let me help you!"

Panel 7: Joe helps Jancy to slowly turn onto her back. Jancy is shown at a profile, back arched, eyes shut and teeth clenched in pain. She's letting out a quiet grunt of pain. There is a small scrape on her left cheek. Joe's hands are behind jancy's head and on her opposite shoulder. Joe's blonde hair is visible hanging into the shot, but her face is out of view. Joe is saying, with each separate sentence in its own individual speech bubble, "Let's get you turned over real careful alrigh'? Take your time. That's it... You're doin' great darlin'!"

Panel 8: a large speech bubble from Joe reads, "There. Jus' take a breather, sugar." A close up on Jancy's face framed by Joe's hands cradling it gently. Jancy is panting, her eyes closed in exhaustion from the effort, mouth open slightly and head tilted back. Sweat on her face. Joe is wearing a silver bracelet. A scraggly speech bubble coming from Jancy reads, "uungh??" One of Joe's hands is lightly brushing Jancy's cheek while the other supports her head.

Panel 9: speech bubbles from Joe read, "Oh, you poor dear... lemme get this hair outta yer face!"

This panel is similar to the the previous panel. It is still a close up on jancy's face from Joe's POV. In this one, Jancy is slowly opening her eyes, a small question mark next to her head as she slowly focuses on the image in front of her. Joe's hands are supporting jancy's head and brushing the hair out of her face. In this position, jancy's collar is askew, and her shirt is open to the just below her collarbones. A soft hazy light is reflected in her eyes. With every panel, the comic has shifted slightly more from a blue color tone to a slightly warmer pinkish tone. It is now much warmer than the first panel.

Panel 10: a close up of Joe's face from jancy's POV, looking down at Jancy with her face framed against a sunset sky, the light brightening her golden hair. In this shot, her skin is a saturated sky blue. Her eyes are blue and her lipstick is a bright pink. She is smiling at Jancy and speaking with a gentle, sympathetic smile. She has dimples. She is saying, "Well, there you are!!"

Panel 11: a close up of jancy's face, once again framed and supported by Joe's hands. Joe has brushed the hair out of Jancy's face, giving her the look of someone who has just had their hair blown back. This matches Jancy's expression, which is one of awe. It is very gay. This panel is the most pink-tinted of all the panels so far.

Panel 12: the same image as the previous panel, but zoomed out to include Jancy's shoulders and upper chest in the shot, as well as Joe's muscled forearms. This also makes room for speech bubbles, which overlap the edges of the panel's frame and surround Jancy.

Joe is saying, "No sign of any fever, thank goodness! And thank the stars yer not bleedin'! No need to fret! You're safe with me!! I'll take care of ya! Still, I think I best get you outta this alley!"

Panel 13: a wide shot in full color and a lot of detail of Joe carrying Jancy in a bridal carry. Joe is several times larger than Jancy and carries her with no effort. Jancy is mostly limp, her head resting on Joe's breast. She is looking up at Joe, blushing slightly, and looking embarrassed . She still looks pretty lost and disoriented, mouth hanging open a little and eyes straining to see Joe's face without being able to move her body much.

Joe is smiling brightly, posture confident, she is saying, "Now don't you worry! We'll have you feeling right as rain in no time!!"

Joe is walking down some kind of wooden boardwalk that is framed on either side by flower bushes. Behind that, a sunset reflects on a body of water that goes out to the horizon. The scene is warmly lit. Willow leaves hang down in the foreground. Joe is backlit by the sunset.

Panel 14: a close up of the previous image, focusing in on the character's faces.

Bonus image: the same as the final panel but with no speech bubbles covering up parts of the background

Could you maybe do something involving Luna? Like your headcannons and stuff?

Omg I haven't done headcanons in FOREVERRRR

☆

Luna Lovegood headcanons

Includes- platonic headcanons and romantic headcanons

Warnings- gender neutral, house neutral, bullying, idk what else

Platonic ☆

Nobody has ever seen the one of you not with the other.

You back her up on anything, bullying and etc.

When her things get stolen or hidden, you search high and low even though she tells you, you don't have to do it.

When neither of you have a date to any of the fancy school functions, you always take the other, even if one of you has a date already.

Sleepovers. All the time, her dad treats you as his own.

And because he treats you as his own you get free volumes of the Quibbler.

Sharing clothes is a must, Luna keeps a good amount of thick sweaters and coats, so you always take on from her clothing trunk on your way out.

You two have your own secret friend language. You both use it to cheat on work and talk about someone who's 5 feet away.

She tells you fun facts about certain magical creatures which you are fascinated by everytime.

You both also create cute dances late at night. You performed them at Bill and Fleurs' wedding.

She likes to play with your hair, no matter the length or texture, she will somehow always find the perfect way to style it to your liking.

The two of you go to small antique shops near Hogsmeade when you're allowed to go down. You and Luna split up and buy stuff for each other and always find the perfect things for the other.

Romantic ♡

You're the bigger flirt out of the two. Even if you are shy, she'll let you run it all. She wants your confidence to build.

Every time one of you twirls the other while dancing, the person will be pulled in for a kiss right after, and then it will be right back to dancing.

She isn't huge on PDA, but you've convinced her to let you hold her hand through the halls and in classes, just for some extra comfort.

But once the two of you are alone, it literally becomes cuddle central. She also has some of the best blankets, so you sleep wonderfully every night.

She compliments you every day, whether it be your looks, outfit, hair, or shoes. It doesn't matter. She adores you and will admire anything you do.

Okay so we covered that you would stick up for her, but once your together you take on a whole different level, you've gotten in trouble for how violent you get about it, people are just they aren't as amazing as her.

Also, her dad brings up your futures together all the time. You both find it more funny than embarrassing.

After your antique shop trips, which you've both now turned into dates, you'll both get ice cream and candy for the trip back to school.

You love to smother her in kisses after going to hang out in her dorm.

You're both obsessed with each other and accompany the other all the time, no matter the setting.

I love doing headcanons

Writing questions: 1, 8, 35 please :D

yay, thank u!!!!!! :3

writing ask

1. What font do you write in? Do you actually care or is that just the default setting?

this is a fun question, bc honestly, i write in comic sans! i read a tweet at some point somewhere that was like "listen if you're having a hard time writing bc the words on the screen seem intimidating or you're taking things too seriously, write it in comic sans." bc it's like literally impossible to be wary of comic sans!! like it's become a joke font, yeah, but we kickstarted it bc it's so friendly! also it's good for dyslexia bc it's bottom heavy!

8. If you had to write an entire story without either action or dialogue, which would you choose and how would it go?

honestly if i'm not paying attention, i can end up writing entire things w/o dialogue just by accident. i really love writing heavy introspection-based character studies (which is... probably apparent ahaha), so would definitely choose to go dialogue-less if pressed. it'd probably go okay, though the piece would definitely be bite-sized.

35. What’s your favorite writing rule to smash into smithereens?

god, there are writing rules? lmaooo, i'm not really sure!! i have no actual ~*Training*~ and i'm sort of allergic to reading non-fiction so i haven't consumed much writing about writing. the one thing i can think of is that i willfully push back against the socialized idea that flowery/purple prose is 1) "Women's Writing" and 2) less worthy than straight-forward, grounded writing styles. think faulkner, hemingway, twain—your typical all american white male authors.

when "on earth we're briefly gorgeous" really gained its stride and people started discussing it as the newest addition to the canon of Great American Literature™, ocean vuong had a lot to say about this exact thing. bc not only is his book structured after kishōtenketsu (a four-beat plot structure that originated in chinese as four-line traditional poetry, and which has spread to korea and japan; you have almost certainly encountered its usage before, bc it's the narrative structure hayao miyazaki employs) instead of the western 7-beat narrative—it's also non-linear and reads almost like a prose-poem. to have a book written by a vietnamese-american immigrant considered part of the american lit canon is huge in itself, but adding to that the fact that the novel was written in a prose style that has been looked down on by literary critics for decades (which involves a really funny amount of shitting on nabokov honestly, like y'all could fuckin Never, the dude was writing in his third language and he still wrote wildly evocative shit like "I am just winking happy thoughts into a little tiddle cup") is like!! huge.

so idk, i like to think i'm sticking it to the man (and my dad whoops) by being a trans man writing in prose that's heavy on sensory figurative language. also i have been told by english teachers past that i use too many em dashes, and to this i say Suck It, Nancy Streblow ;)

Edgar Jacobi (Watchmen) | DC Database | Fandom

This is Edgar Jacoby AKA Malik and he is the character who is going to be assassinated tonight. They say it is the character ozymandias, when in fact it is not and they have to investigate it. And shortly thereafter the comedian goes flying on a window it's nine stories it's a hell of a fall and he is put into a casket in tomb the next day it is pulled out and he's in rough shape but not bad. Tons of people are making fun of him for it when they don't understand the situation. They're a huge amount of people bothering Tommy f about the aliens because they've seen some and he seems to know about them. It's getting very rough out there even here and we need to send in cops and troops and we need them now and we need people to volunteer for this duty if you're a non-combat roles or you're not a troop or a trooper we need to volunteer for police duty from any kind of duty please

Bitol and Goddess Wife

The shooting is significant it opens investigation until into the attack on New England Malik is found guilty whether he is or not is up to you to decide we know he's partially guilty yes and the issue warrants on tonight that are real they don't just say it and revoke them and so forth and they're issued in New York City and their examined and they talk to the investigators and the issue them globally. The comedian is out until tomorrow and he is not a conspirator in hitting New England however they do ask him questions about it and he does say that he thinks he knows people who are involved and reveals that after he gets hurt because he thinks it was actually Malik who beat him up and they're a few reasons it's his fighting style and he was saying things by throwing certain things and Mora and more so is a big mouth and he said it that way and they went looked and it was and they interviewed people he knew where trumpsters and they knew about it and they started resting them and it became a huge deal and tonight and tomorrow and Justin is revered for it

Note; I deeply apologize seeing as this is going to end up being long. Onto the information; My name is Ghost(mainly go by this one), Acid, Killer(more of a nickname), or Gore(more of a nickname). I go by he/they/xe/its, and I'm a dude, MLM and poly so it really doesn't matter much who it is. Born March 31st, being an Aries I'm a very loud and energetic person. I'm also very impulsive and get myself into deep shit, even if I don't realize I'm doin' it. I get overly loud when the topic is about something I enjoy or is into, if I try flirting on purpose it's ass but when I do it without realizing I get called a huge flirt. Big music and art geek, I have sketchbooks upon sketchbooks filled just sitting around in my room. I listen to a lot of rock like Queen, Guns N Roses, Red Hot Chilli Peppers, ACDC, Nickelback, KISS, Slipknot, KoRn, and on and on. Although I listen to every genre of music minus country(although there are few songs I can deal with). Big tattoo/piercing person, if you have one visible I will point it out and geek out about it. Although literally don't ask me to name a few songs unless I've been rambling on about it because I have the shittiest memory. I dye my hair so often it's surprising my hair is still healthy. I have literally bleached my hair, dyed it red and let that fade for a week, then dyed it blue and have been touching up the blue ever since then. If it wasn't due to money problems and the fact it's hard to borrow in my town my hair would probably have my hair a different color every two weeks. I ramble quite a bit and have the shittiest focus and memory, so you may have to pull me to the side and tell me to calm down. Would definitely compliment on the boys looks, specially their outfits. I'm a coffee and monster addict at this point, you'll see one or the other in my hand, and the occasional water bottle because I try to keep myself health. My love language is through touch and insulting people. Ex, "I fucking love you dumbass" or flipping you off playfully as a way of saying "i love you bitch". Smoking doesn't bother me, grew up around it my entire life. I love riding on motorcycles, no matter the weather, is it cold asf, nice idgaf, is it raining, shit lets go. I have a bad(good in some people's eyes) of using petnames/nicknames for everyone. Everyone has a wholesome petname from me and then I'll call them a whore or some shit. I cuss too much for my own good, I literally don't have a filter in my entire body. I will impulsively say shit, sometimes that's a good thing and sometimes it's a bad thing. Due to my anxiety I try to stay away from large crowds, but if I'm in them (aka on the boardwalk) I will have music blaring in my ears and my ears glued into my current sketchbook. Although I currently don't have them, I'm going to add them anyways because I'm going to end up getting them when I have the money to go to a piercer or to get a kit. I want a shit ton of piercings. Such as snake bites(lip piercing), tongue, septum, all of the piercings finished on my ears, and bridge. I've stated once I'm a big tattoo geek, so I want a quite a bit of those. I'm definitely a big "oh let's do it myself" person, and I have tried giving myself a septum piercing. (it would've worked if it wasn't for the fact I did it too low to be able to flip it up to hide it) I love the adrenaline of fights, it doesn't matter if I win or loose, although I do prefer if I win. I literally get the most random urge to fight someone for the hell of it. Probably has something to do with impulsive thoughts and shit, but oh well. I'm a big respect person, I live by the motto "you respect me, I'll respect you". I have blackouts sometimes due to rage and anxiety, so I try to keep myself from having them. I have a bad habit of rambling and saying sorry too much. I tend to repeatedly say sorry whilst rambling as I tend to get overly excited and loud when I ramble. I'm a very talkive person if I know and trust you. If you're around me and you don't get your ear talked off or messed with, you're probably not liked or

you need to leave. It's one easy way you'll be able to tell if I get along with you or not. I kinda have a whatever/punk/alt style, a lot of time I just grab something decent and throw it on. Although you'll always see me wearing a belt and my platform shoes. I'm 5'0, so my obsession with platforms grew because of my need to be tall. I wear a lot of baggy clothing, I'm definitely more of a comfort over style person.

Ok, my dude, I'll definitely pair you with...

Marko and Paul

Oh, man, you three are gonna be some threesome (and not necessarily in the sexual way lol)

Just imagine THE MESS

The boys think you're adorable when you get into the romantic mood and try to flirt but end up saying bad pick-up lines, so they'll laugh, but will twirl their hair as whoerish as possible and follow the game. Or they would get on with their manly act and fight to see who will flirt back better.

Now, the chatting will be so goddamn long! You three will go on 4 hour-long conversations that'll get from a "look at this new t-shirt I got" to "so that's why Ronald Reagan was an alien". The worst part is left to the spectators like David or Dwayne since none of you three will be the sane individual and shut y'all up.

The blondes like your drawing, and ask you to draw them or random stuff and people CONSTANTLY, so you'll have many opportunities to improve your skills and try with different models. When they happen to find some of your sketchbooks, they try to impress you or simply give a small present by drawing you or something you like, or at least make the attempt since some of the "fine pieces" as they call them, they give you are like children's school projects.

And, man, about the hair, are you blessed to have the glam diva Paul by your side to give advice and constructive criticism to your hair. He will help you choose the color and will give it style from time to time if you accept. The process to dye it will be so much fun, and so chaotic; experimenting with the pigments ends up with wounds caused from the bleach and the currently used wardrobe disposed later.

A thing they love about you is that you can stand up for yourself if needed, but they rather you not to, because they know you handle yourself and the others well, maybe too well for your good. Paul tries to take care of you as much as he can so there is no need for you to possibly get hurt. It was enough trying to control Marko so he didn't get involved in some stupid street fight every night at the boardwalk to now have to worry daily about you too. Marko shares the passion for the adrenaline of this and will think it is hot as hell, but he protects you as much as Paul, maybe a bit softer than him about it tho, but if you're in the middle of a fight and it starts to get worse than expected, he dead ass will force you to back off. He'll finish the business himself, sweetheart.

As for your love language, don't worry, these dorks will accept you playful pushes with joy, and they'll give you some of them too. But if you accidentally flip and fall some meters before hitting ground, you know the rule: laugh first, help second.

Oh, and you better get prepared for the bullying. You're the smallest in the group, so that leads to a constant attack as a hobbit. Marko joins the quip, but I mean, he'll get humiliated along. Let's just say Paul gives you two a hard time about it. With all the love of course.

They love to get out with you and the others and go to the boardwalk, but they try to take you out on days it is not that crowded, or in hours where a small amount of souls are having a stroll. But, if you happen to go out on a crowded night, they will keep you focused on having a good time, but just mention your getting uncomfortable and you'll be back at the cave in less than a minute.

Paul and Marko really love your style, they think it looks badass and try to match tough outfits with you from time to time. Giving you cool shirts and leather jackets with some patches on them that they think are awesome. Don't ask why some of the clothes have strange-colored stains on them tho.

They go with you to get you ears or nose pierced from the moment you three decided doing it diy style was a bad idea cuz y'all ended up with a bleeding nose and an ear infection the first time of trying it, and because there's no voice of reason in the threesome, Star and Dwayne had to give you kids a very long lecture of not doing those things by yourself.

Hi~! You're amazing (in typing those three words I already made like 50 typos that's how amazing you are omg) I was wondering if you could write how the RFA+Minor Trio would react to an MC who ALWAYS forgets her birthday (this is actually me omg I forget my birthday every single year whenever someone greets me I look so confused and then they're just so done with me all my friends are so tired) lol thanks!!

HHHHhhhhHHhhhh Thank you!!!

I hope you like it anon!!

Yoosung:

He’s so, so excited!!

oh my gods its your birthday and you’re celebrating together and and and he needs to get the perfect present oh no will he have enough time?

well, it turns out he does (even though he’s so stuck in with school work that he couldn’t finish your present sooner)

why?

because you forgot.

yeah. you forgot your own birthday.

MC HOW?!!?!?!?!??!?!!??!!??!?!

By the third time, he’s used to it

but he still marvels at the fact that you manage to forget your own freaking birthday

like it’s not like it’s ONE MORE YEAR OF SURVIVING AND LOVING EACH OTHER IS IT NO NOT AT ALL

[i’m not bitter]

Oh well, it’s worth it for seeing your eyes light up when you remember

he tries his hardest to surprise you better and better every year

he plans detailed side-quest-like hunts that revolve around your forgetfulness

also gets the RFA to chip in (thank you Jaehee for fine tuning it, ur gr8)

and one year, he tops them all

by proposing~ (⺣◡⺣)♡

ZEN:

is all prepped to spoil you with his attention

and his fans are too

so when you wake up and are completely surprised by the amount of gifts you’ve been given, he kinda does a double take.

“Wait, what? MC, you seriously don’t know what day it is today?”

“No.. Why? Did you get a new role and forget to tell me or something?”

“You’re kidding.”

he just sighs and reminds you that it’s your birthday

to which you grace him with a huge smile, awkward laugh and an “oh, yeah, right.”

you guys spend the rest of the day going around and visiting all of these nostalgic places

[que next year]

“Morning MC~! Do you know what day it is~?” “No… What day is it?”

*record scratch* *freeze frame*

{Zen’s face is something resembling ∑(ΦдΦlll}

okay, so you’re actually serious…

pampers you anyway

at this point, he just sighs and reminds you with a smile

I mean, this is just a quirk of yours that he learns to love ♡´･ᴗ･`♡

Jaehee:

Oh my bab

she’s been so used to being busy with work that she used to forget about her birthday too (༎ຶ⌑༎ຶ)

but now that you’re working together at the cafe she has more time to relax

which means, she can prepare for your birthday! and hers too, eventually, she supposes

So she wakes up early and goes to the cafe after writing you a little note (telling you to relax and sleep in, and that she’ll take care of a few things first)

(she’d made sure that all of your regulars knew that the cafe would be closed today so you two could have a day to relax.)

she spends her whole morning baking and decorating a beautiful cake for you.

Then she decorates the cafe a little, putting up a “Happy Birthday” banner and such

when you get to the cafe, you’re confused. Who’s birthda- oh.

You play it off like you didn’t forget, but she knows.

It happens a lot from there on

and she just smiles and laughs it away. what can she do about it? it’s a part of you.

Jumin:

He’s up early, finishing a breakfast in bed for the two of you

it’s your birthday so of course you should spend it in style and comfort??? hello?? duh??

when you wake up, you are greeted with the smell of [favourite breakfast foods]

Jumin comes in carrying a tray covered int he most delicious, mouthwatering food you have ever tasted in your life

“mmm! it smells so good!! what’s the special occasion?”

he laughs, thinking that you’re joking. you raise an eyebrow

oh shit you’re serious

“MC.. it’s your birthday.” “It is?” oh yeah, it is

you share a laugh and then spend the rest of the day together, having fun, going out etc.

then it happens again, the next year.

He doesn’t get it. How can you remember literally every other holiday (including but not limited to: things like Noodle Day, Dog Day, Umbrella Day and Vincent Van Gogh’s birthday) but not your own birthday???

So he gets you a personal calendar with professional photos of the two of you (”Can I not just want a photoshoot with my girlfriend?”) and makes sure it’s marked, in bright colours [MC’S BIRTHDAY]

so you never e v e r forget.

Saeyoung:

WHOO HYPE IT’S YOUR BIRTHDAY AND HE’S GONNA PRANK YOU

and how does he do that?

He ‘forgets’ it’s your birthday, giving the others time to plan a surprise party.

so he’s all ready to treat it like a normal day when you wander into the kitchen and… well…

plan failed.

you’re acting like it’s a normal day too..

DID YOU LEARN ABOUT HIS PLAN?? WERE YOU TRICKING HIM??? DID YOU KNOW ABOUT THE PARTY?????

no. you just… forgot.

well, you’re greatly surprised by the party, that’s for sure.

by the second time, he decides to update your phone a little

he sets it so that every year,,, on your birthday,,, at twelve AM,,,,, like clockwork,,,,,

it plays ‘Happy Birthday’ REALLY REALLY LOUDLY AND YOU ARE UNABLE TO TURN IT OFF OR DOWN UNTIL IT’S OVER

it also covers the screen with confetti and balloons but that’s not the important bit

which leads you to your first birthday of slapping him in the face right as you wake up

V:

he’s just really excited for your birthday.

since he’s gotten surgery, he can’t wait to spend the day out with you, just going wherever you wanted and doing whatever you preferred

i mean, you do this a lot, but today was special ‘cause you had cake

when you wake up, he’s running his fingers through your hair, and drawing patterns on your skin, like he always does [hhh goosebumps]

“Happy Birthday MC~”

your very sleepy brain barely processes this and when it does, your expression turns confused

“what…?”

???? do you not know what day it is???

he writes it down to just waking up and you continue on with your day

then the next year rolls around

you guys don’t get to see each other until later in the day because he had an unchangeable business trip.

You shrug it off and say you don’t mind (you were sleeping all day anyway), but he can’t stop thinking about it.

so, when you pick him up from the airport, he’s the one with a massive bunch of flowers instead of you.

he gives them to you and apologises for missing your birthday.

wait what?

Saeran:

He wants to surprise you for your birthday

he just doesn’t know how

so it’s actually a huge relief when you wake up with no realisation of the day

I mean, at first he thinks you’re pranking him, but no..

at some point, he calls up the RFA for some help in surprising you

Seven: take her to a theme park and propose on top of a roller coaster

Jumin: Treat her to only the best e v e r y t h i n g

Jaehee: ??? take her out on a date? idk??

Zen: Treat her like a princess and shower her in flowers and love and

Yoosung: ?? hECK?? ?

Saeran: I hate all of you

eventually, he manages to plan a cute picnic date at your favourite park

there are fairy lights strung up through the trees and flowers all around and it’s just so cute and heartfelt and gahh i’m crying

and it still surprises you ‘cAUSE YOU FORGOT EVERY OTHER TIME SOMEONE REMINDED YOU

heavens have mercy MC

and at the very end, he actually ends up taking Seven’s advice ღゝ◡╹)ノ♡

Vanderwood:

they’re happy to be sharing your birthday with you

they just want to do something fun to chill out and just relax so they enlist Seven to help plan something fun

oh gods why

Seven plans an adventure hunt that involves you two wandering around the city [kinda like his Valentines Day DLC but not]

it ends with a trip to the beach where they made reservations at one of your favourite restaurants

your birthday rolled around soon enough, as it tends to do

and they wake you up pretty early to start on the hunt

but,,, you’re confused,,, why are you getting dragged around the city at 7 in the morning???? 

Vanderwood pls

They just kinda stop

“MC it’s your birthday you know” “what” “yeah.” “you sure?” “positive.”

oh

ok

They should’ve figured

You tend to forget the important things, like when you’ve booked an appointment or have bills due.

So, like most things, they take it upon themself to plan it out.

oh also your dinner/night overall ended up pretty gr8

HECK THIS IS LATE I’M SO SO SORRY!!

also still can’t write Vandy well… i don’t do them justice… i just,,, ,love them ,,, so ,, mu ch,, ,, , ,

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Hi! I've been reading your stories for nearly a year now and I really enjoy them - you're a great writer! I have a slightly (very) crack idea for a prompt inspired by Ariana Grande's song Side to Side, where Effie can't walk in a straight line in the morning after a night with Haymitch. I feel like it would open up for a lot of teasing from Haymitch that would be funny to read. Maybe pre-HG or a 5-times-and-1 style one shot? Up to you! X

This was fun and this is crackish ;) [X]

A Sore Price

The kids were skittish and it was why Haymitchusually avoided making an appearance at breakfast, all the more so when Effiewasn’t there to play buffer. He tried to ask about Training, if only to shut uphis guilty conscience, but all he got was some mumbles about bigger teenagerswho were bullies. The girl didn’t seem to know where to look when she addressedhim, she was red in the face. He pulled his dressing gown shut tighter so nohint of his bare chest could be seen. Being a prude wouldn’t help her in thearena but he figured she was entitled to some respect for as long as she couldget.

Although he resented it a little. He had put on pants and a dressing gown. Hewasn’t always that considerate when it was only him and Effie in the penthouse.

He gave them some advices that they didn’t takeseriously enough. He could see it, the looks they exchanged, as if listening tohim would be worse than going to the Games without a mentor. He wasn’t sure atwhich point he had become such a joke that people from his own Districtinstructed their children not to takehim into account. He would have Effie repeat it again later, they respondedbetter to her – not that they liked herbut she had shown from the start she was there to help when he had vaguelyscoffed and declared they should get ready to die. Maybe she had a point whenshe said he needed to work on his introduction speech.

He was relieved when the clicking of heelscould finally be heard. She stormed in with her usual unchecked energy and ablinding smile.

“My apologies for being so late!” she chimed.“Good morning, children! Good morning, Haymitch.”

The kids muttered greetings, quickly fleeingthe table when she hovered behind them correcting their eating habits. Shepouted a little but reached for the coffee pot and poured herself a cup. Shewalked around the table and propped her hips against it to steal what was leftof his blueberry muffin.

“What took you so long?” he snorted. “Tootired?”

Faced with his smug smirk and his twinklingeyes, she huffed. “Hardly.”

“Yeah, hardlyis how I recall it.” he teased.

She pursed her green painted lips, tilting herhead a little to the side – not a hair moved from her silver and blue wigstyled as a huge puffy bun on the top of her skull, it left her nape bare andhe already knew it would be taunting him all day.

“You left marks.” she accused him.

His eyes slowly roamed on her throat and on thesmall amount of cleavage that particular dress offered, checking as much astaking in the view… “Can’t see any.”

“Yes, that would be thanks to the half bottleof liquid foundation I had to use.” she deadpanned. “And that’s only on my neck and collarbones. I couldnot get a proper look at my back but what I saw was enough. Did you mistake myshoulder blades for chew toys by any chance?”

He stood up, trapping her between his body andthe table. “Didn’t hear you complain, sweetheart… In fact… All I heard was ‘more, Haymitch’ and ‘yes’ and some pretty impressive moaning…” He brushed his noseagainst her cheek as he brought his mouth to her ear. “Fucking hot, you were…”

And the memory was enough to give him a boner.She placed a hand on his chest to push him away a little, flashing him achiding look.

“Do not get any ideas.” she warned.

“Bet I could have you screaming right here onthat table before Avoxes show up to clear it.” he challenged.

“Five times.” she reminded him. “Aren’t yousated yet?”

He was thirty-five and he was celibate most ofthe year. He was far from being sated.Besides, one of those times had involved his mouth and his hands so it didn’tcount for him.

Some night it had been though… Once at the veryboring party, once in the car, eating her up in the momentarily stoppedelevator, the particularly hot session in her bed with her on her stomach andthe lazy bout in the shower because some cleaning up had been overdue. He had been forced to carry her back to bedafterward because she had been so exhausted her legs hadn’t been able to stopshaking. She had been deep asleep when he had left for his own room.

“Are you?” he snorted.  

He expected some more banter because theyhadn’t been able to keep their hands off each other lately. There was somethingnew to their affair. It was less hate sexafter a fight and more… sex all thetime for no good reason at all. He didn’t know what it was about theSeventieth Hunger Games but… He wasn’t going to look at it too closely. Theywere having the best sex he ever had.

“For now, yes, I am.” she replied withoutbatting an eyelash. “Go get dressed, we have work to do.”

“Bossy.” he commented, lifting an eyebrow.“Maybe you should help me getdressed, sweetheart.”

She triedto remain serious but she turned her away to hide her smile and she couldn’thelp a chuckle or two. He took the opportunity to press a kiss on the side ofher neck. It tasted like make-up and it made him wrinkle his nose. He hatedthat taste.

“Do not undo my work.” she rebuked, pushing onhis chest again. “Go get dressed, Haymitch. I have a meeting with a sponsorscheduled in an hour, we cannot be late.”

“Fine.” he relented. “But I’m gonna fuck you again before the day isthrough.”

She rolled her eyes and shoved him back alittle more firmly. It was cute that she thought she could make him move whenshe was as strong as a kitten. He humored her though. It was always good tohumor her a little.

The outfit she had picked was good enough forhim – once thing he was grateful for with Effie was that, unlike previousescorts, she didn’t try to impose current Capitol fashion on him, she allowedhim outfits that were trendy but that he could live with, it was a compromisebut one that worked – although he left out the tie.

He came back to the living-room after somefifteen minutes – time enough to get ready and to get a few mouthfuls of liquorin his body – expecting to find her on the couch, reviewing schedules orsponsors files. She was checking hernotepad but she was doing it standing up, leaning against the bay window, afoot hooked around the back of her other ankle.

“I sent the children to Training.” she told himwithout looking up from the page. “We have five minutes before we need toleave. We are going to a restaurant for brunch, Haymitch, so I would thank you to put the tie back on.”

“That tie would look better around yourwrists.” he taunted. It was just a joke though. Tying her up… He didn’t trusthimself enough for that, as appealing as the idea might sometimes be.

“The tie, Haymitch.” she said firmly, still notlooking up.

That annoyed him. He didn’t like it when sheignored him or dismissed him like that, like he was just a chore for her tobear or a toy she took off the shelf when it suited her. He snatched thenotepad from her and pinned her against the bay windows, his free hand on herhip.

The kiss was brutal and it took her aback.After a second, she responded to it just as violently. His fingers left her hipto grab her thigh, hooking her leg up, aligning their bodies enough that…

She drew back with a hiss and he froze.

“You’re okay?” he asked, easing his grip onher. It had been pretty rough the previous night, he had bruises and scratcheseverywhere and he was ready to bet the same was true for her.

“I am fine.” she replied “We will be late.Please, put on your tie.”

She was lying, he thought, but he couldn’tquite decide about what. He let her go and didput on the tie if only to bring a flicker of a smile back on her lips.

He was surprised when she insisted on walking to the restaurant. Districtteams had cars at their disposal twenty-four hours a day and Effie wasn’t a fanof walking when she didn’t have to – and with the heels she was perched on hecouldn’t quite blame her for it. He, on the other hand, liked to walk so hedidn’t protest but he kept watching her in the corner of his eyes.

She was just as chatty as usual, her cheerfulescort self, but there was something off about her. It took him a while torealize it was the way she strode straight on. He usually had to adjust hispace to hers – because, despite her long legs, he was taller than she was – butright then, she was taking purposeful giant steps that made her look a littlefunny.

“We’re late or something?” he grumbled, notreally enthusiastic about this sponsor meeting in the first place. It neveramounted to anything and it was always uncomfortable.

She faltered a little and slowed down her pace.“Not at all.”

She picked up her previous topic again, wavingher hands left and right as she talked, but there was a strain in her voice anda slight wince every few steps.

“You’re sureyou’re okay?” he asked, as they came in sight of the restaurant she usually chosefor sponsor meetings. It was expensive, the staff was haughty and he hated theplace with passion.

“Right as rain.” she hummed, stopping longenough to make sure his tie was straight. “Now, do behave and let me do the talking.”

“Sure.” He rolled his eyes, irritated with her.“I’ll just sit there and look pretty.”

“You do that, dear.” she grinned, patted him onthe arm.

He vowed to pat something else of hers later.

“Don’t call me dear.” he muttered as he pushed the restaurant’s door,automatically holding it out for her – thethings she had drilled into him…

She ducked under his arm to go in, chuckling alittle. “Of course. How stupid of meto forget you have the pet names privileges in this relationship.”  

“Not a relationship.” he was quick to correct,the word making him want to flee to the other end of the city.

She didn’t even blink. “Poor choice of word.”

It calmed him down a little but not a lot.

The fact that the sponsor they were meeting wasone he really didn’t like helped distract him though. He tried to bite back theclever retorts, the bitter comments and the loathing gibes – if only becausethe guy might give them some money.

He hated the way the man was looking at themhowever – at the two of them – likethey were some really mouth-watering dessert he wanted to taste. Haymitch wasalways left with a strong urge to punch the Capitol sponsor.

Effie played it like she usually did: seductive.The man liked to think himself clever so she acted dumb, giggling a lot at herown fake intellectual clumsiness.

Her smile was a bit strained though andflickers of something kept disruptingher carefully constructed mask of flimsy escort. The sponsor didn’t seem tonotice but Haymitch did.

Something was definitely off.

She was squirming in a way she rarely did –never when he didn’t have his mouth between her legs at least – and for a momenthe wondered if she was turned on. She crossed her legs and then uncrossed themonly to cross them again… She leaned forward or backward as if to alleviatepressure…  

The thing that kept flashing on her face, thereand gone in a second, wasn’t pleasure though. It was pain.

He was pretty sure he had done nothing tobruise her ass so it couldn’t come from there, which meant…

Five times might have been a time too many.

“Well, this was a waste.” Effie sighed, as theyfinally exited the restaurant.

“So you say every year.” he mocked. “And yethere we are.”

“You never know. One day he might actually do something more than justbeing a creep and squeeze himself through his pants at the thought of the twous together.” she scowled, not as oblivious to the guy’s fantasies as he hadthought. He wasn’t sure why he was so surprised by that. She excelled atreading people and the man wasn’t being subtle. It was a miracle he hadn’t yetoffered a threesome – or maybe he had and she had kept the information fromhim. “Perhaps you should go to the mentor lounge and see what you can find outabout our opponents…”

She was usually the one doing the digging.Victors were far too careful to let anything slip, some of the escorts now…

“You’re ditching me. You’ve got plans?” hesnorted.

“Not at all.” she immediately denied. “I stillhave some paperwork to fill so I will go back to the penthouse and…”

“Put ice between your legs?” he cut her off ina teasing tone.

She froze for a second and then quickened herstrides. “I do not know what you aretalking about. How vulgar of you. Truly, you…”

“Save it.” he interrupted again, grabbing herarm to stop her and immediately letting go because they were in the middle ofthe street and he didn’t need anyone sniffing out the scent of scandal. Itwould end up on Caesar’s special before they even reached the Games Compound. “Howhurt are you?”

She studied him and then pursed her lips,averting her eyes. “I am not hurt per se. I am simply… rather sore.”

“Sore.” he repeatedly flatly, acutely awarethat people were pointing at them and that it wouldn’t be long before someoneasked for pictures or autographs if they didn’t get a move on. He nudged heron, careful to adjust his pace to hers since he didn’t know how bad it actuallywas. “The fuck does that mean?”

“It means… It burns.” she admitted, clearingher throat. “I do hope it is just the result of last night and notsome horrible disease you…”

“You’re the only one I go with without acondom, sweetheart.” he sneered. “If anyone gives the other stuff…”

“I am clean.”she huffed. “It is frankly insultingthat you would even imply…”

“Calm your tits, sweetheart. Just joking.” hetaunted. He buried his hands in his pockets, feeling awkward. “You’re sure it’sjust sore, yeah? You’re not… hurt hurt?”

Because hurting her was the last thing he wanted to do.

But he had a bad track record.

“I am sure I will be fine tomorrow.” She shothim a side look, her lips stretching into a rare genuine smile. “If you canhold on for that long, that is.”

Haymitch rolled his eyes, not quite able tostop himself from smirking.

Not that he would admit it out loud but heusually held on half the year for her, so… A day wasn’t that long to go.