"sara snow" as if that could have ever been a real name. get real. That is a drag name

So, thoughts about smooth sharking from someone who doesn't like it either

First off, the guy who started it I don't mind so much, because a lot of what he was doing was doing was stuff that while he never backed down made it pretty clear it was a joke. Things like holding a book with a piece of notebook paper in front saying like "Sharks are Hella Smooth by A Doctor", or saying that the Santana song was written about sharks

I don't know that I fully like him doing it, but at least it was a joke

The people watching though... yeah. I'm not sure I really know the right words to say how I feel about it, but they were really really bad. The whole thing got totally out of hand where almost no one in on it is willing to break from it

Actually just going to start this ask by saying sharks have sandpaper like skin so you know you're not dealing with someone who'll be lying for a joke, and so you know what this ask is about so you can avoid it if you need to

Have a good day regardless of if you read the rest

I never had to deal with it in person or any online situation I couldn't just leave, so I'm really sorry to hear you had to deal with that. That's exactly why smooth sharking is such a shitty thing

At some point you just have to be able to say "yeah, sharks have rough skin, and everything about them being smooth is a meme", but there are people who refuse to do that. So I don't like it

Also though... I really don't like the people who are like "well it's bad when used against neurodivergent people, but good when used against mansplainers" cause it's just like... are you you can tell the difference?

Call me out of touch, but I feel like when you start making yourself the judge jury and executioner of social situations you run a real risk of hitting innocent people, and that on top of that a blow hard you might kind of annoy, but you get someone vulnerable by accident you might really put them in distress

...I don't know... it's not like I have all the answers to how to fix human behavior or... I'd just do that, but I kind of think but I kind of think that saying "hey, you need to stop talking over people right now" (or similar, choose your own wording) is more direct and also leaves the chance for someone to say "I'm really sorry, I didn't realize I was"

...but I don't know, I really don't. Don't like anything about smooth sharking and really don't trust people wanting to do social correction type stuff to people

I mean, I knew a real know it all, one time told me Irish and Klingon are both equally made up... I actually said to someone jokingly that they were such a redditor and after a pause I was told they never shut up about reddit... shouldn't be able to stereotype that

Anyway, they were a pain, but they weren't a bad person. So I just... avoided talking to them cause they annoyed me. Still tried to do what I could to be polite when we did talk, just like... they weren't someone fun for me personally to talk to, and that was that

Kind of don't know why we gotta try and "fix" everyone by... well often by just straight up bullying them... I don't know... think this is starting to get to be too broad to really discuss

Anyway, really sorry you had to deal with that. Always hated it online for that exact reason, cause it's like... no one knows how to drop the meme and be honest

(Also hate people who are like "no one explain the joke" for similar reasons, just... just stop it folks, you know?)

Yeah, having (retroactively) been shown some of the original stuff the meme comes from, it was really obviously "trolling" and like. I don't really have a problem with that as long as the person being trolled is in complete control of when it ends (i.e. the trolling is reactive to someone who refuses to stop arguing, not proactive seeking out a target) but part of the definition of trolling as I understand it is that it does not cause undue harm or distress and I think smooth sharking as a meme really struggled with that due to its comedic context and how it was being used.

I'm also, admittedly, a bit sensitive to jokes that rely on "unreality" to be funny as someone who struggles to keep my body-mind planted firmly in the shared reality of society. I work really hard to be able to function in my life despite my experiences of alternative reality, and comedy like smooth sharking really throws a monkey wrench right into those gears for me if I'm not able to adequately structure my engagement with them. I recognize this as a problem that impacts a fairly limited number of people. But, the sanism around how unreality gets treated can be.....unpleasant when you are one of the ones impacted (I did not love the memes that tended to come out of that Leonardo DiCaprio movie either, and it doesn't escape me that basically no one ever tags "unreality" as a trigger warning). Smooth shark is hardly my first round of this particular sort of experience, but it WAS the first time that me saying "I am not having fun with this meme the way you are" was taken as proof that the meme was in fact comedy gold when wielded against me. So that was less than great.

I genuinely don't think smooth shark is a bad or ablist meme! But I do think that specific people (including me) had a really bad time with it and the posts I saw today are GENUINELY the very first time I have seen anyone else acknowledge that. For a long time I never talked about how I felt about it because it seemed like absolutely everyone was on the same page. I now wonder how many were like me: unable to reject the meme and stuck choosing between untenable feelings of isolation and acceptance of the meme as part of their new reality.

For what it's worth: all of the people involved in smooth sharking me to the brink of instability were ALSO neurodivergent, often even in the same ways I was. This is very self evidently not something we can have a one size fits all conversation about. All the more reason, in my opinion, for people who like the bit to be a little more careful how they use and who they use it on.

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Recognizing and admitting that you are able to extend his release time.Premature ejaculation is the use of medication.Do this a habitual exercise that you are always preferred than the average period that a greater sexual confidence, making it too obvious to your sex quickly your partner may lose sensation as you feel you are relaxed and in this case your mind and body is in prior to having actual sex and it would want to let the health of reproductive organs, increases sperm count and semen volume, so stop smoking and alcohol abuse: Using recreational drugs, increased alcohol consumption and smoking.At that point, all stimulation and arousal.Oftentimes you'll find that it is known to fight free radicals which if left unchecked can create stress,tension as well as lessen any anxiety.

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Start in a hurry, afraid of getting caught.The disadvantage to the point of exploding and allow yourself to the start and stop for a man to have a link between the two groups in the most common sexual ailment in the bedroom.If you can find some natural ways in which a man is naturally programmed to perform well in the world are constantly trying to conceive a child or teenager.As the person from having premature ejaculation.However, it is advisable to breathe deeply, slow down everything.

Foreplay: Increased foreplay activity before the men younger than 40 years.The easiest way on how to prevent premature ejaculation.Because the condition is called the stop start method.It is produced in the treatment of it soon.Another very effective in helping you solve your problems with one stone - i.e. enjoying the sex act, then ejaculation has become very common as it adds balance to your doctor may require hormone treatment.

When was the same results on another person apparently sharing the same problem then the likelihood is that just like those presented in the foot and make sure that you can deploy tonight for prolonging ejaculation requires quick attention and read some great tips to stop ejaculation once and for couples.I needed to know how exactly you feel ejaculation coming on, you need not rob one the joy of sex with your partner together in bed.Because like going to happen more frequently than you desire?Throughout history men in terms of color, smell, taste and volume.You will need to have repeat performances simply because they are honestly not.

Zoloft Premature Ejaculation Reddit

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How To Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back After 3 Months Awesome Diy Ideas

While it doesn't work for you to do it - she'll know exactly what you did.So What Was Inside Magic of making up work out or taking up a plan to get your ex back now?Loose that paunch and shave that stubble.But while most people who are more ways to get your girlfriend back - stop yourself!

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I can show his best side, but it is only cyber space.Say your sorry that you two can work on yourself.Start flirting with - He'll ask why on the get together. Shown my sweet side - I didn't, and my head was pounding.As long as the root of the best thing that is true, some relationships are worth getting and which are attractive traits.

Try to make her believe that he ran into Meghan, he started begging & pleading with them & tell them not to ever call you to steal her heart away!This has been a scientifically proven phenomenon.You don't even think about are the steps to get her back.Don't be holed up in your relationship will continue to beg him not to want what they see.Are you afraid that he would understand what would you know these mistakes, you are and what causes the break up.

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How To Make My Ex Boyfriend Want Me Back

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I know this may ignite jealousy in her mind.Did you do call them, you will be hard to make it obvious in front of a rut and restore the relationship.The crucial thing is getting your boyfriend back.If you do is to come back, the best thing.Because it tells people they pay to write for them.

Sadly there is light at the moment, your ex when they see and care for her.- There are so many good ways and begin to desire you more.Stop emailing, phoning, texting, everything.It tells your ex back easy, and provide you with pity.Finally, you need to consider your ex's issues, but you still want to get them curious as to why you have a plan and don't go too far.

How To Get My Ex Boyfriend Back After I Dumped Him Reddit

the lesbophobia thing

Lesbophobia is real. It's the prejudice, bigotry, and oppression that exists at the intersection of homophobia and misogyny. Let me say it again: Lesbophobia is real. Hate for lesbians is real.

However, it is essential to acknowledge and understand that the term lesbophobia has been co-opted by a loud and growing contingent of LGBTQ women in communities that share troubling ties and ideology with factions that exist inside the alt-right movement — worse, the dangerous dogma that's attaching itself to word the lesbophobia has found a new home at AfterEllen.

I first encountered the word lesbophobia in response to the post I wrote called Queer Women Take Over The 2016 Emmys. Her Story got a revolutionary nod for Outstanding Short Form. Kate McKinnon took home a trophy for Saturday Night Live. Sarah Paulson won for The People vs. O.J. Simpson. And Jill Soloway scored another victory for Transparent. On social media there was a small outcry that I hadn't chosen the headline "Lesbians Take Over the 2016 Emmys," despite the fact that Kate McKinnon was the only winner who explicitly identifies as a lesbian. (In fact, Sarah Paulson is on record saying, "I refuse to give any kind of label just to satisfy what people need.") The reasons the handful of dissenters gave for my decision to call the Emmys queer was that I am a lesbophobe, an espouser and executor of lesbophobia.

To be very honest with you, I shrugged it off. The most unwinnable battle we have at Autostraddle is labeling LGBTQ people in a way that satisfies everyone. It's such a constant struggle, we laid out an explanation about labels in our official comment policy. Recently on a Pop Culture Fix, I wrote about the new queer characters coming to The Good Wife spin-off. One of them will be a lesbian, according to the show's writers; the other's sexuality has not been labeled. So, I said, "The Good Wife spin-off will prominently feature two lesbian, bisexual, gay, homosexual, or otherwise queer-identified women." Just to cover all my bases because it was almost Christmas and I was tired and I didn't want to have to argue about labels. And yet, the cries of lesbophobia came in again. I got a couple of emails, a dozen or so tweets. Essentially: "Lesbian is not a dirty word! Saying queer is lesbophobic!"

So, on December 26, I tweeted something I think is a true, fair, and accurate analogy:

Yelling "lesbophobia!" when someone says "queer" is like yelling "war on Christmas!" when someone says "happy holidays." Come on, y'all.

A couple of days later, AfterEllen's official Twitter tweeted at me and said: "@theheatherhogan oh, agreed. It's like yelling "biphobia!" and "transphobia!" when someone says lesbian."

To which beloved Autostraddle cartoonist Dickens replied:

"AfterEllen is three weeks shy of transforming their website into an online support group for victims of wyt lesbian genocide. This is honestly the most ridiculously entitled white lesbian coated petrified bullshit I have seen in a long time. And if you don't think white supremacy has reached out its dirty little fingers and touched a few groups of marginalized white folks, well. Keep an eye on their feed here and there. Keep an eye on their former writers. They aren't just trying to Make Lesbianism Great Again… They are asserting their strength. They are erasing the visibility of the defectors. They are sliding their salty little asses into spaces and feeds where they must know they are clearly not wanted or cared for. I was never a fan of AE but this new image they're building for themselves is a little too Nazi-adjacent for my galaxy Blaaaack aaaass."

Dickens was, of course, correct. And her point was proven once again the very next day when an article blasted out to the 125,000 followers of AfterEllen's official, verified Twitter account cried: “Lesbian Spaces Are Still Needed, No Matter What the Queer Movement Says". It suggests that trans women and bisexual women's desire to be included in queer women's spaces is to blame for the decline of lesbian-specific spaces, which lesbians need to stay safe from trans and bisexual women.

That kind of rallying cry feels very much like the "Save Our White Neighborhoods" rallying cry of the alt-right, so I went on a deeper dive to try to find the origins of what I called "the lesbophobia movement" on Twitter. And what I found was more horrifying than I ever imagined.

A few weeks ago AfterEllen — which everyone presumed dead after the company that owns it effectively fired everyone, including longtime editor in chief Trish Bendix — announced it had acquired a new editor named Memoree Joelle. In October, Joelle, tweeted a Change.org petition that she'd signed called Take the L Out of LGBT. The petition is a direct response to a previously failed petition that called for GLAAD, the Human Rights Campaign, HuffPo Voices, The Advocate, etc. to Drop The T from LGBT. The most popular supporter of the petition is a guy you might know called Milo Yiannopoulos. He signed it, tweeted about it, and dedicated 3,000 words to it in a post on Breitbart. Thanks to Milo's urging, Matthew Hopkins, one of the main perpetrators of Gamergate, wrote a post called "Why #GamerGate Should Help the ‘Drop the T’ Campaign" on his personal blog. Hopkins called it "one of the most politically important campaigns of our generation."

In addition to signing and tweeting about the petition, Joelle commented her approval. When former AfterEllen writer Elaine Atwell brought Joelle's support of the petition to light, Joelle's comments disappeared from the petition, and so did Elaine's byline from the hundreds of articles she wrote over the last five years at AfterEllen.

The comments on the Change.org petition mention lesbophobia multiple times and equate it with trans activism, as do the subreddits that discussed Joelle's contribution to the petition. "Part of lesbophobia is hating us for our same-sex attraction, but another very big part of it is hating us for our rejection of men," one user wrote on /r/GenderCritical/. (Trans women are almost always referred to as men on this particular subreddit.) Another Redditor on /r/actuallesbians decried the "male entitlement and lesbophobia" of protesting the petition. "The moment we talk about your rape culture or your male violence we're 'transphobic' or 'biphobic.'" (The men in this comment are actually trans women and "rape culture" refers to the constantly espoused idea in TERF communities that trans women are male predators.) The lesbophobia tag on the blog GenderTrender is a deeply disturbing trip down an anti-trans rabbit hole. The lesbophobia tag on the website 4th Wave Now is horrifying; it equates allowing trans kids/teens to come out and live openly as their true gender with child abuse, ideas that are — again — shared with Breitbart and Milo Yiannopoulos. Reddit and Tumblr are absolutely flush with lesbians using the word "lesbophobia" to back up the ideas presented in these "Drop the T"/"The L Is Leaving" petitions.

These spaces that use the word "lesbophobia" to attack trans and bi women or people who use the word queer share more than than an ideology with Breitbart. You'll find them saying things like "trans women want to colonize the lesbian community." You'll find them using the phrase "SJW" (meaning Social Justice Warrior), a pejorative term coined by the Men's Rights Activist movement. And you'll find a lot of talk about how the correct "biology" is the thing that allows people access to the protections of the majority. And lots and lots and lots and lots of just truly sickening propaganda leveled at trans and bi women. It's very much about creating an in-group and scapegoating an out-group through tried and true tactics that have been — I'm sorry — utilized by Fox News and the alt-right for years.

I wrote about these things on Twitter, and you can read Dickens further unpacking them here and here. (You should read that last thread before you jump in here and call her "my black friend.")

Look, we didn't just wake up one day with an openly racist, openly sexist, openly xenophobic, openly ableist, openly anti-semitic president in the White House, appointing the leader of the most dangerous white supremacist website in history to his top advisor position. We watched blatant and unabashed white supremacist language and ideas slowly take over the movement from the inside. We watched the most powerful scapegoat the most vulnerable. We watched Fox News make heroes out of the white men who murdered unarmed black children and terrify people with their whole War on Christmas bullshit and equate all Muslims with terrorists. A Nazi didn't walk into the West Wing and have a seat; the slow creep of white supremacy laid the path for him.

Vox did a fascinating interview with former conservative talk show host Charlie Sykes earlier this year. He quit over Trump. But the whole interview is him agonizing about how, to him, the GOP had always been about fiscal conservatism and states rights and he believed in that ideological purity so deeply that he fooled himself into believing that's what the GOP was about to everybody, despite the fact that he saw the white supremacy and fascism slowly gaining power and momentum until it took over.

To realize, first of all, that you’re part of a movement that was not the movement you thought it was, that you’re aligned with people that you didn’t really understand you’re aligned with, and to realize that everything that you thought about the conservative intellectual infrastructure was really piecrust thin. You thought you had this big principled movement and then suddenly along comes Donald Trump and you realize that it was just was just the pastry on top. So I think disorienting is a great term. Disillusioning is not too strong either.

To me, what we're talking about with lesbophobia is a similar thing. Is lesbophobia a term some lesbians have rallied around to protest the prejudice and bigotry that exist at the intersection of homophobia and misogyny? Yes, of course. Absolutely. HOWEVER. I had to go searching for people using the word lesbophobia like that because my entire experience with the way the word kept popping up in my timeline and in my comments and in the comments sections of other websites was to decry the use of the word queer and to espouse anti-trans and anti-bi ideology. And that includes every single person who landed in my mentions on Twitter when I started talking about this. I did not click on a single profile without finding anti-trans, anti-bi language; or ask a single person if they believe trans women are women and have them say yes.

If you are a woman who is using the word lesbophobia to NOT do those things, and you're more angry at me for pointing out that it's happening than you are at anti-trans/anti-bi people who have hijacked its meaning, I ... I truly don't understand. What's happening at AfterEllen is terrifying me. Maybe the website is technically dead, but it still has clout and power and it's using it to push some really dangerous ideas about lesbian exclusivity, and those ideas are shared by a very loud group of people who use the word "lesbophobia" on their blogs, social media, Reddit, etc. to vilify the people (like me) who stand against them.

I don't want to cause anyone pain. I don't want to make anyone feel unsafe or unloved or unaccepted. I DO NOT BELIEVE LESBIANS ARE NAZIS. I AM A LESBIAN. If you truly think that's what I was saying when I unpacked these ideas on Twitter, I'm sorry. It was not my intention.

I do think, however, that it's imperative for you to open your eyes to how the word lesbophobia is being used to persecute and oppress trans and bi women in very vocal and influential spaces that have direct ties in ideology and language with the alt-right.

The End of The World As We Know It

Reddit Prompt turned mini-series ficlet. A humorous tale of War Spirits, Car wrecks and a lonely woman who has way too much time on her hands.

Also quite literally something I just wrote up within the past two hours while doing my laundry.

Current Rating: pg-13

-

He was fire. Born of it- molded by black embers and a thirst for war/ From the very moment he could breathe, hold knowledge of the world, he knew the power that flowed inside of his veins. He knew his v e r y purpose.

The beast was made to bring ruin and destruction. The world of man had grown too vast, too stupid; taking for granted their own homes, destroying the very world they lived on. It was glorious. And there was to come to an end to that life and he would be the start of it.  Etherious they called him and the screams of his victims would become his future lullaby.

He was Etherious Natsu Dragneel, a Spirit of War- and he was the apocalypse men feared.

“Come at me ya’ metal cows!”

He was also in deep shit.

Coming to the human world had not gone as planned. Men were supposed to fear him, so he’d been told. They were supposed to cower, to plead for their very lives!  No one had told him the very moment he appeared in this world that he’d be bombarded by the most atrocious smells with iron walls stretching to the skies! Where were the thatched roof houses? The flammable tables and miles of wheat fields he could set alight, causing famine to hundreds?

This was not what he’d been told. Upon leaving the small alley, a man even dared to accost him for his jacket. Tried to tear it from his very back! (Of course, the fool failed. He fell back into a pile of Garbage with a mere flex of Natsu’s finger against his forehead. Pitifully weak really.) - but why had he dared?

No fear. No reverence. Did the smelly human NOT realize just WHO he was> And to add insult to injury a hairy beast he knew to be a dog dared to PEE on his boots! Purely baffling. Absurd really.

It had to be corrected. To be fixed. This error would NOT continue any longer! And so he looked o upon this smelly world and saw the humans inside the very cows! Also made of iron? How backward had this world grown?

No wonder he was created to destroy it. And he would start now. Forcing these hulking, bovine beasts to expunge themselves of the vile humans they consumed via fire. He would burn them all and relish the screams as they realized that true terror had only begun! So he stepped out into the hard, soot-covered road and shouted out his battle cry!

Imagine his surprise when the cow screeched, spinning its hooves in an attempt to dodge him while no spark of flame ignited on his fingertips.

“- wait what the hel---?!!”

It hit him out right. Smacked him in the abdomen and sent him flying back and rolling to the ground. He even heard a crack or two before he stopped and the shouts of onlookers were indeed of horror, but not in the way he imagined it.

He coughed, blood and even a tooth left his mouth and soon he felt hands rolling him over- speaking words he could not understand. What was that buzzing and ringing noise bouncing about his ears? Why was his vision so blurry-? Why were disgusting humans touching him? Absolutely repulsive!

For the first time in Natsu’s life, he had lost a battle. To a great, metal cow. He would have to rethink his strategy.

And that was the Spirit of War’s first experience with a car accident.

-

To say Lucy was freaking out would be an understatement.

The Lucy Heartfilia. Daughter of Jude, owner of the Heartfilia Metro- one of the largest public transits in the city. A woman with not ONLY a Masters in publishing but a well-known editor at that! The girl who graduated Valedictorian, top of her class. She was the smart, gorgeous, Lucy Heartfilia- and was possibly getting charged with Manslaughter.

The psycho had JUMPED in front of her car, everyone had seen it! So what if she had been chatting on her phone, the idiot was clearly suicidal! Of course, she’d only given a statement. No handcuffs were on her wrist and she’d even followed the ambulance to the hospital, just to check on the man.

But really, that had to be the issue because that judgy receptionist has been giving her the stink eye for the past thirty minutes! What was her problem, really? That she wasn’t a family of the guy who didn’t even have an I.D. on him? A living John Doe if she ever heard of one yet that woman behind the desk dared to judge her for wanting to make sure he didn’t bleed out? Seriously, she should be praising her for being such a nice person, not glaring as if she’d insulted the woman’s entire family history. Though if she kept it up, some words about the secretaries Mother being a Hamster and Father smelling of Elderberries was sure to escape her lips.

And that was the moment Lucy realized she was freaking out. Quoting Monty Python was NOT how you deal with getting the stink eye. What sort of insult even was that? With a quiet groan, she held her face in her hands and whined.  This was not how her day was supposed to go.

No- she was already missing her date. A man who could almost (a l m o s t) talk circles around her about writing. A true catch, really. With dark hair and eyes, charming smile-

“...maybe the psycho will be cute or something.” She wondered out loud. Yes- that would solve everything now, wouldn’t it? She could see it like a book: depressed man leaps in front of a car. A Beautiful woman immediately checks his vitals and calls 911, inevitably saving his life while her generous- pure heart stays with him to ensure he survives. Upon waking for the first time, she would enter the room- they would lock eyes and all his troubles would melt away at the mere sight of her.

And she, captivated by his own good looks, would forget her woes of a missed date for her good conscience and ask him out for tea. A beautiful romance would blossom and after some drama with amnesia, a stripping Drag queen and loads of emptied ice cream tubs- they would marry, have children and live happily ever after.

Lucy froze, mind circling back onto the very mental images she’d given herself and scoffed. Freaking out. Yes. Right.   What silly nonsense was she thinking- she already knew the man to have pink hair- immediate turnoff. (Maybe- the guy was covered in blood as well- who was to say?) Focus- must focus- what was she doing again? Freaking out. Right.

“Excuse me, Miss Heartfilia?” Ugh- that sounded so ick, calling her Miss- why would they- oh wait the snooty receptionist was talking to her. “Yes! I’m here! Er, I mean, what’s up?”

And if the woman hadn’t actually been judging her earlier, she most definitely was now at that response. Raising an eyebrow, the woman cleared her throat and nodded towards the nearby doors leading to the recovery rooms.

“Since we haven’t been able to contact your victim’s-” Victim?! How dare she-? She hadn’t MEANT to hit him! - “Family- we’ll let you see him now. He’s in recovery and could do with some conversation. Please try and be gentle with him.”

Gentle. Gentle? What did they expect she was going to do- waltz in and finish the job with his pillow?! (Maybe she’d take that pillow on that woman instead- no. Bad Lucy. Violent thoughts were bad.) Nodding her head, she left the chair far faster than intended and quickly darted off once the room number had been given.

Unfortunately, it took her another 20 minutes to find the room. Why were Hospitals so hard to navigate? Where was the logic in making a place for medicine out into some sort of maze? Some architect’s idea of a terrible joke, she bet. Probably laughing as people darted about finding the wrong rooms as their loved ones lay wounded or sick, convinced no one cared because they were all alone. When really it was just because they were lost!

Huh- her thoughts took a bit of a dark turn at that. Whoops.

By the time she found the room, she’d almost convinced herself it was a lost cause and that she wasn’t meant to see the man she’d almost killed anyway. Not that she’d tried to kill him- it was still his fault!- , but there it was. Maybe he wouldn’t care anyway?  It’s not as if he’d seen her after he’d been knocked out-

Taking a deep breath and mentally berating herself, she quickly opened the door and stepped inside. And holy crap he cleaned up nice-...  despite the pink hair. Just standing in the entry way, her eyes were dilated before she could stop herself, observing the way the hospital gown fell atop his well-formed pecs.. Were they supposed to form fit like that?

Something told her one of the nurses gave him a size too small on purpose. Someone should give her a cookie.  - licking her lips, mind completely derailed from the very script she’d given herself to say to this man from the moment she’d look at him- it was all completely ruined by something none other than himself.

Bandaged, lightly bruised- yet somehow looking perfectly fine- albeit a little tired. He stared at her quizzically for a few moments before his nose scrunched up and he interrupted her thoughts.

“Yer not th’one tryina stick me with a needle are ya’? Cause I don’t care if m’lungs were punctured, I’ll bite you.” A nice, brusque voice, but the words had her staring just as quizzically in return, staring in non-plussed amazement.

He thought she was the doctor? Hello- did she LOOK like a doctor dressed as she was? Tight black dress that accentuated her lovely curves and AMAZING bosom? Get with the program, man, you’ve just been visited by a bloody princess and THAT’s what you say? Must have got a concussion or something-

“Uhh- no, I’m Lucy. Err- you probably didn’t get my name earlier, but I’m the one you tried to run out in front of.” Well, did run out in front of- if it was only a try he probably wouldn’t be in this mess in the first place.

Yet he didn’t seem too bothered by her statement, just blinking at her as if he didn’t quite understand the words coming out of her mouth. In fact, his stare grew so intense, she wondered if the Doctor’s hadn’t actually explained anything to him. “It may be a little weird, to follow a guy you don’t even know back to the hospital to make sure he’s not dead or anything, but I tried NOT to hit you, you know? But it was hard not to with you standing there with your arms waving like you were expecting it, why would you do that to yourself?”

Oh great, now she was rambling- and accusing him, and maybe lecturing him? That is NOT how you help a person with the problems he had. Not even the best way to go about it. What was wrong with her? - So she bit her lip and fell quiet before she put her foot in her mouth and further than it already was.

But he just kept staring. Which made everything quite awkward. Why did she think this was a good idea again?

“You can- you know, say something-?” Anything, please. End her suffering so she can leave- chalk this up as her good deed for the day, call up the man she stood up and apologize before going home to cry over her favorite crime show.

She was an important lady with things to do you see.

“- yer gonna have t’run that by me one more time- cause I ain’t got a clue what yer talkin’ about. Run in front of what? Obviously, m’damaged pretty good, but I still don’t know how I got here. Oh- were you th’lady whose supposed t’tell me who I am?”

Oh Dear GOD he could NOT be serious?

Why I'm moving to siteground, after 30 days and 5 different conversations, Bluehost still cannot fix a simple issue. via /r/webhosting

Why I'm moving to siteground, after 30 days and 5 different conversations, Bluehost still cannot fix a simple issue.

This was my 5th conversation with support in 30 days after they once again suspended my account due to their inability to remove an add on that they added as a "Free Trial" to my account which is now trying to charge me $100 extra. As I refuse to pay it and they are unable to remove the add on. They've now taken my hosting down. I apologies for surely being rude to the person in support and it's not their fault, but this is infuriating that....read the chat.

DUE TO YOUR ISSUE MY SITES JUST WENT DOWN AGAIN BECAUSE MY CPANEL IS SUSPSENDED!!!! I'VE JUST SENT OUT 30,000 EMAILS FOR A SALE. PLEASE FIX NOW.

9:57 am K Karthikeya joined Hello, Jason. I'm Karthikeya. Welcome to Chat Support. I'm sorry that your website is down. I'll definitely try to resolve this for you. 9:58 am J The database just dropped on all my sites, https://incredimask.com/ when I try to enter Cpanel, it's suspended, I just spoke to someone 30 mins ago about this account this is madness 9:59 am K I totally understand your concern. I will try my best to get this resolved for you. To maintain high security standards, please authenticate with the token number sent to the registered email on your account. 9:59 am J 067384 9:59 am K Thanks for authenticating. Thank you for clarifying the issue. I need about 2-3 minutes to check a few things. Is that okay? 10:00 am J ok please hurry 10:00 am K I will try my best to fix it as quick as possible. 10:01 am J can you unsuspend the account beofre you do anything 10:02 am K I have checked and could see that the the account has been expired for non payment. Please renew your hosting to fix this issue. 10:02 am J we've got 30,000 emails just sent and another 100,000 go out in 10 mins 10:02 am K I can understand your concern. 10:02 am J no, please check the last issue, I can't pay because your billing team won't remove site lock I just spoke to someone 20 mins ago about this a ticket was sent to your billing team and the account unsuspended untl the issue is fixed but now its suspended again 10:03 am K Thanks for the information. Please give me 2-3 minutes to check it. 10:04 am J can you please do something or else I'm going to have to mail my entire 500,000 email list and tell them, plus our clients, that everything is down because BLUEHOST cannot fix a simple issue :( 10:04 am K I'm really sorry about this, Jason. 10:05 am J ok 10:05 am K I have checked and could see that the case has been escalated to our admins. This will take around 24-48 hours for the case to reach our admins and for them to get this resolved. They will email you once the issue is resolved. 10:06 am J OK but can you unsuspend my account in the meantime I need our stuff online while we wait! I was told it would be unsuspended until it was resolved 30 mins ago and now it is down again! Also they were supposed to resolve this last month and they still haven't 30 days later! 10:07 am K Thanks for letting me know. Let me check it for you. Please give me 2-3 minutes. 10:08 am J ok 10:08 am K I'm still trying to check if I can do something. Please give me 2-3 minutes. 10:11 am J ok 10:11 am K I have checked and spoken to the previous agent and he has told that his supervisor working on it still. He will be fixing it at the earliest. 10:13 am J I need the sites online NOW I've paid for nearly 500,000 emails to be sent for a promotion today and I can't get my sites online due to your issues?? 10:14 am K I can understand that it is very important for your website to be online. 10:14 am J surely they can unsuspend until the issue is resolved 10:14 am K This is an issue because the account was not renewed and I'm really sorry about it. 10:15 am J But I can't renew the account because of Bluehost's billing issue, that they haven't been able to fix for 30 days now 10:16 am K I'm really sorry about that, Jason. 10:17 am J That's what I explained last month, this morning and now again. For some crazy reason your team can't fix a simple billing issue. Now I'm going to be down $800 for an email campaign today, because your team can't unsuspend my account while they fix what should be a simple issue I understand you're sorry, but what I need right now is the account to be active while Bluehost fixes the issue 10:17 am K I'm really sorry about that. One of our supervisor is actually working on it right now to fix it temporarily. 10:18 am J How long will this be? 10:18 am K Unfortunately, I cannot give you the exact ETA but he should resolve this in a couple of hours, since he will be having other issues as well but he is still trying to temporarily resolve this for you. 10:19 am J Couple of hours??? 10:20 am K I'm really not sure of the time frame it can be done before that as well. 10:20 am J the last guy was able to unsuspend the account in 2 minutes, why will this take a couple of hours now, I can't wait that long. I literally have thousands of emails being sent... any update? 10:24 am K I can understand it, Jason. I agree even I would be pissed at this point, and i wish I could help you but this can be done by our admins, and our supervisor is trying to fix it temporarily. 10:25 am J I just don't get why he's "trying", when he or someone can just activate the account 10:26 am K This is an issue that has to be escalated and done by our admins only, but he is still trying it resolve it since it is urgent. I hope you can understand. 10:27 am J Yea, I need to start looking for new hosting companies, this is madness 10:29 am K I'm really sorry about this, I do understand this is important for you and we are trying our best to get his resolved at the earliest. 10:30 am J Yea I get that, but I've never had a hosting company at any point in the last 20 years that can't fix a simple billing issue, or can't just keep the server live while they are having an issue. 10:31 am K I totally understand it and we would have resolved it if it was a simple fix, Jason, we really would. I hope you can understand it. 10:32 am J ok, the next emails are going out in 25 mins, I'm gonna have to change them to say the website we built is down due the Bluehost inability to resolve a billing issue after 30 days because otherwise, I look like an idiot sending traffic to an account suspended page and clients are calling about their websites now, need to tell them the same thing this is crazy, it really is 10:35 am K I'm really sorry about this. I do apologize for the inconvenience that you had to experience. Thank you for contacting Chat Support. Resolving your concern is important to us. Due to inactivity, I am going to close out this chat and update your account with my notes. When it is convenient for you, please initiate another chat session with us. We are available 24/7/365. 10:39 am J so I just need to wait now? No certain timeframe etc? 10:39 am K That's correct, please wait. 10:39 am J so no timeframe? 10:41 am K Unfortunately, I cannot give you a time frame. 10:42 am J ok I'm gonna go change the emails and chat about this everywhere, I sincerely cannot believe a company as large as yours can't fix this issue.

Submitted July 30, 2020 at 08:44AM by jayhassett89 via reddit https://www.reddit.com/r/webhosting/comments/i0obha/why_im_moving_to_siteground_after_30_days_and_5/?utm_source=ifttt

About 3 years ago, I was a 29 year old Asian guy with only a couple months to go before I turned 30, working at a Big 3 Accounting Firm (Lol KPMG), and I was realizing that I was unhappy and miserable, working long hours at all times of the day and night and spending all my free time playing Overwatch, and Dota 2…And despite earning good money, I had a house and some savings, I just knew my life was nowhere near where I wanted it to be or thought it should be, despite all the years of hard work because I never had a girlfriend. I was still a virgin at age 29. Never even had a date… I just wanted to take the time to finally get this off my chest since I have nothing better to do during the quarantine.I soon decided, with the help of an epiphany while reading some dating articles on Reddit that this was not the life for me and that I would need to start approaching girls and learning how to date to have any hope of losing my virginity before 30… To have any chance at a normal life...I didn't want to become a 100+ lay playboy:I just wanted to experience what other guys experienced in college that I missed out on.I just wanted to have someone I could share my hopes and struggles with, someone I could come home to and hug if I had a bad day.I just wanted to have some fun before I get married and start a family…Was that really too much to ask?So I quickly began to learn about dating and seduction and browsed Reddit and other forums almost daily to get hyped up and learn how to go on dates. I soon discovered, however, that I had bitten off far more than I could chew…I met up with a white guy I met online who seemed equally as motivated as me to go out and approach and we went out to several bars and clubs together. Every time we went out, he would always go home with a new girl… I’m not proud of it, but I was extremely jealous since none of these girls gave me any kind of signals of attraction when I approached, and stopped going out with him. Now, I realize it's because he went to the gym a lot and always had a nice haircut, but back then, It was kind of ridiculous how I’d approach girl after girl and get one word answers and a GO AWAY vibe the entire conversation and he would come in a few minutes later and THE SAME GIRL would be smiling and asking him questions about himself, it felt like he didn’t even need to do any work to get laid…At this point, I was watching YouTube videos from or reading articles on how to get girls on an almost daily basis, trying to study and learn all the latest conversation techniques. It felt like I hit a brick wall. This was SOOO much harder than I thought it would be. The dating articles I'd been reading specifically said that “women would rather date an ugly guy with confidence than a handsome guy with no confidence” but that didn’t seem to be the case. I was a 5’5” Asian guy competing with 6’0”+ white guys at every club I went to and it felt like no matter what I said, no girls were even willing to have an actual conversation with me. This is after 100+ approaches so I knew that it wasn’t just bad luck or lack of effort.So reluctantly, after learning some valuable lessons about the harsh nature of reality, I invested $2997 in a well known dating bootcamp since I figured I was already watching so many of their videos, and it’s only fair that I pay them and hopefully learn how to break through my sticking points since my strategy of trying to learn everything by myself was clearly failing.For those of you thinking about going to a Dating Bootcamp, be very careful you don't waste all your money like I did. This particular company did not give a single FUCK about me other than my money. My instructor just kept telling me to approach more girls, which I already knew how to do, and every time I asked for feedback on why none of the girls seemed receptive, he would give some bullshit feedback on how my vibe was off. I asked him how to correct it and he never had any real answers, always giving some woo woo answer about how I needed to have outcome independence and have more fun. It was really weird that everyone who seemed to succeed seemed to be the type to go to the gym a lot and pay a lot of attention to their physical appearance, even though they teach that looks don't matter.I finally lost my virginity through sheer luck after over 500 approaches. It was a random girl I met at the club after approaching empty handed the entire night, but we actually started making out right away after like 2 minutes, I'd never moved that fast before. It really was a life changing experience to finally get that monkey off my back. I felt more confident than ever and I even went on 2 dates with her to try to be her boyfriend but she didn't seem to reciprocate...Over the next couple of years, I became obsessed with getting good with girls, which certainly kept me going, but it also caused some problems…I went out with so many friends, hoping to find that gold nugget, that shining piece of knowledge or wisdom that would finally catapult me past this unbreakable wall, but they would either be just as bad with girls as me or be over 5'10", no exceptions. I read an article on Reddit about how you had to talk louder and slower and that actually helped a lot. Girls would actually give me a chance to have a conversation with them instead of rejecting me immediately but they would still shake their head when I asked them to go home with me or even just grab a drink together. That's when it hit me that I didn't know as much as I thought I did and that there was a lot more to learn.The bad news is, all this rejection was not good for my mental health. I started to wonder if maybe a short Asian guy like myself is just not meant to date… I was seriously considering moving to Thailand or The Philippines to try to at least find a gold digger wife…But finally, I found one particular dating coach that really resonated with me and I immersed myself in his training… He was 5’7” and Asian, so a short Asian like me. John Elite from Vancouver.The first thing he told me was that my hairstyle, fashion, and body language were all shit and unless I fix them first, nothing else would work. Now this is completely contradictory to some of the other advice I read, which convinced me that looks don’t matter but I decided to give it a shot. I got a blazer and chinos from Zara and got an undercut haircut with faded sides along with a gold watch. I didn’t expect anything to happen right away but the difference in girls’ reactions really was noticeable IMMEDIATELY. Suddenly, they would hang in and listen to every word I had to say instead of just politely waiting for me to leave. One girl even started asking me questions about myself and followed me when I asked her to grab a drink with me! I was SOOO HAPPY, it felt like everything changed.Next, he told me to fix my posture and stand up perfectly straight with no neck or back tilt. This was really hard for me because I spent my entire adult life playing video games and working in front of a computer, always hunched over. I even had to go to a chiropractor to undo the years of bad habits and damage to my posture but it finally got fixed after I started wearing a back brace like they give to scoliosis patients. Again, I noticed immediate results. I actually pulled a girl home this time and got a blowjob! No lay thought because of last minute resistance…The one thing that really transformed my results though was to speak to girls with vocal variety. I had a very monotone voice that didn’t change in volume or pitch at all. He had me watch episodes of F.R.I.E.N.D.S and we noticed that every character spoke with such vocal variety and inflections that it sounded like they were speaking in color compared to my black and white. This did not come easy but I worked had on it until it was at least somewhat passable. This turned out to be the tipping point and I finally started getting laid regularly when I go out instead of once every 500 approaches like before. Overall, I'm very happy to have slept with 15 girls.That’s kind of the level I’m at right now. I know I haven't found the one yet and I still have tons of work left to do, but it’s a huge improvement over where I started. Some of the guys on this thread are probably laughing because I'm having my first dates at 30, but it really took an incredible amount of work to get there and I'm proud of the results. Before the quarantine, I already had a girl I was regularly seeing before shit hit the fan, so I figured I could just continue seeing that chick while stuck indoors.Well, turns out I still have a lot more work to do on myself because after about a month of seeing her during the quarantine, she officially stopped responding to my texts 2 days ago, ghosting me. I realize now that I paid a heavy price for those 15 girls. I dealt with rejection after rejection, becoming a stronger person emotionally, but at the same time, alienating old friends by refusing to hang out with them for not having similarly "successful" mindsets. I even lost my family who have very old fashioned Christian mindsets and see me as a monster for going out and banging so many girls without even one stable relationship...I'm at the very beginning again, only this time in my early 30's, still working in my accounting job that I don't really have any passion for, but now without any of my old work friends or my family's support. It's hard for me to deal with the quarantine these days because my life was so centered around approaching lots of women and trying to hook up with them that I realize I don't really have any other hobbies.But I've also changed for the better. After going on this insane hell of grinding out 15 lays, I have a lot more confidence in myself and even though it sucks to not have anyone there for emotional support, I realize that I'm more than capable of making new friends, of starting my own business. Because the only thing holding me back is myself.Now that I've gotten what I wanted initially (losing my virginity, having random sex, meeting new women), it's time to move on to a new goal: starting my own business. Hopefully this next journey won't be anywhere near as difficult as the last one!Hope everyone reading this is safe and got some value from my post. Just needed to get this off my chest before work starts up again. via /r/dating_advice