It's very interesting to contrast Kan and Akk as well as Thua and Ayan because they play similar roles in their relationships but with very different bases.
Kan is not having a sexuality crisis in the same way Akk is. Kan knows he's gay. Kan knows that he's attracted to boys and, very specifically, that he is attracted to Thua. He knows that and he is torn between self-hatred, social discomfort and a desperate yearning for what could be if he just gave in.
Akk is having a sexuality crisis and a morality crisis and an education crisis and a personal crisis and just... how many crisis can one teenager have? We're gonna find out. He's struggling with his own thoughts, with figuring out what he's feeling at all and with the very concept of what is going on in his life. He doesn't understand how he feels about Ayan and he's still in the middle of discovering himself.
Thua knows he's gay as well. He knows he likes Kan. He even knows that Kan is protecting him and, I suspect, he knows that Kan likes him back. He's the most honest of the characters, the most comfortable in his skin. He is not in any kind of crisis nor denial. He's just trying to be the best student he can be, a good friend and to keep the people he cares about safe.
Ayan is in a very different kind of crisis. His pain is coming from an outside trauma. He's comfortable with his sexuality enough to use it to his advantage and he's smart enough to understand how to use his knowledge and his understanding of people to help himself. But he's still in a deeper crisis, one of pain and revenge and loneliness and isolation. Because for all that he's doing all of this, for all the flirting and the closeness, he's shared nothing of himself with anyone and he won't for some time. No one at Suppalo knows him.
There are so many stories here, stories about repression and loneliness and isolation and acceptance and fear and rules and history and change.
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god it's just. the way they're both trying so hard to be there for each other, to be strong for each other
akk is at his breaking point already during class with teacher waree and goes hurtling past it with that fucker chadok yelling at him and yet he tries to smile for aye and tries to tell him he's okay. that he doesn't need to worry.
and he pulls himself back together over and over again, lets himself cry for only a moment before trying to be strong because he can see that aye is barely holding on either. it's worrying how good he is at stopping himself while sobbing and pulling back his shoulders and trying to sound steady
and aye. god. aye is furious and trying so hard to get chadok away from akk and he's terrified because he understands how his uncle was driven to his demise, and i think he really, fully understands what his mother felt like now as well, when she asked him if he was leaving her too.
it's the devastation on his face when he looks at akk, who only days ago was smiling and teasing him, kissing his cheek and flirting and being happy, that really just brings this point home. he's trying so hard not to let his grief and his fear and his anger get the best of him because he knows akk needs him, knows that he can't ever forgive himself if he doesn't give akk his all now, if something were to happen to him
it's just. i think they're both trying their best to hold themselves together because they haven't yet learned that they can be weak together, too. "you're allowed to be weak, at least with me" applies to them both at the same time, but it seems like aye and akk think they need to cling to cliff with one hand and each other with the other hand, instead of falling together holding each other
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The Sun & The Moon
They say as the solar eclipse approaches the curse becomes stronger
A solar eclipse occurs when the Moon passes between the Earth and Sun appearing as if the Moon is covering the Sun obscuring its light and leaving the Earth in darkness. The Moon is usually in the New Moon phrase when this happens.
What if the eclipse isn't the actual astronomical event that will cause chaos, but instead it is what happens when Akk and Ayan begin to orbit each other?
Akk [Big Foot] = Sun
Ayan [Short Stop] = Moon
The school's symbol is the sun
And Akk, the bigger and brighter star, is the president of the Prefects, meaning he is the golden child (sun traits).
While Ayan, the smaller one, is the new student and lurks in the shadows (new moon behavior).
Ayan's hoodie, that he wears over his uniform (shadowing the school's symbol = sun) clearly depicts a solar eclipse transpiring:
The top object is the Sun, the lower object is Earth, and the middle shows the transition of the Moon during the eclipse.
The front of his hoodie reads Solstice
A solstice marks when a hemisphere has the most or the least sunlight of the year but is also when the "sun stands still"
Ayan's notebook depicts the sun as well, but he keeps it hidden.
The music video that accompanies the series is also called..."Over the Moon"
Finally, Akk's pin shows the school's sun symbol in golden lighting,
while Ayan's pendant that he wears on his necklace shows the moon transitioning into the eclipse with blue lighting.
A total eclipse is rare. A solstice solar eclipse is even rarer. An eclipse is also known to cause disorder because it can mess with gravitational pulls, technology, and, of course, the natural order of life because it casts everything in darkness.
Akk's life is good, but the exact second Ayan appears, he is off balance. Each time he encounters Ayan, he freezes; he enters a solstice stage by standing still.
Akk, the Sun, should be able to overpower Ayan, the Moon, easily, but Ayan continues to overshadow Akk at each turn because they are an eclipse, and this disruption of the school's natural order will cause mayhem. The closer they get, the stronger the unrest will become.
They are the curse.
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